Enha Angst - Tumblr Posts

soo whos ready? ...

ALONE AGAIN ..

where you two have a argument and they admit they cheated.

pair : enhypen x fem!reader

warning : mentions of cheating , crying , major angst.

LEE HEESEUNG.

you and heeseung haven't been on good terms. always having arguments and sleeping in different locations, but your newest argument blossomed when he came late one day.

"for fuck sakes yn. why are you so upset! i was just with the boys." he yelled and rubbed his temple "hah!? just with the boys? thats a damn lie! you were probably with some girl!" you snarled and poked his chest.

"and so what if i was!? at least she doesnt throw hissy fits everyday!" heeseung yelled as he pushed your hand away, leaving a shocked look on your face.

tears welled up in your eyes as you immediately rushed towards the front door. "yn i didn..—" "save it." you said before slamming the door.

PARK JONGSEONG.

jay was a gentleman and always cared for you. if he was angry or stressed he would kindly tell you he need space! thats what you thought until today.

"jay honey are you coming to bed?" you asked as you peeked in his office. he was on the phone and a womens voice could be heard "i know love.. i'll eventually tell her i swear" he said to the girl.

you stared blankly at his figure as your sight became blurry. "dont worry sweetheart i love y— yn!?" jay said and hung up the phone in a hurry.

"yn i can explain.." "theres no need. how could you jay! after all ive done for you!" you cried out "what have you done for me!? except stress me out! no wonder i wouldve cheated on you." he said coldly, leaving you in utter shock.

SIM JAEYUN

jake had been very suspicious lately. seemingly texting someone, rarely home, and also leaving in the middle of the night. so you decided to talk to him about it.

"yn ive told you it's nothing. now your just pestering me" jake said with a huff and went back onto his phone. "really jaeyun? nothing? well it seems like whoever is on your phone is way more important than me!" you scoff

"what if she is huh? what if she satisfies me more than you do." he snarled and grabbed his keys , shooting for the front door. your mouth fell agape as you started sobbing loudly.

PARK SUNGHOON

sunghoon was tired of your constant nagging and yelling. you were on about the same girl you saw in his contacts and about how mad you were.

"fuck.. could you shut up?" he shouts "you on about this girl in my phone every single day! i should've listened to her when she told me to break up with you for her." he rolled his eyes and you clenched your fists

"fuck you sunghoon and that bitch." you shove at him and walk towards the front door , slipping on your shoes and exiting with a slam.

KIM SUNOO

you were chatting with your friend about sunoos recent actions. they all followed up with the same things like "go through his phone!" or "talk to him about it!" and you followed through.

"yn! why did you go through my phone?" sunoo questioned and crossed his arms. "i dont know. why have you been hiding stuff from me!" he sighed and held the bridge of his nose between his finger tips.

"i saw what you and her were chatting about. who is she!" you yelled "she was just a mistake okay! i was mad at you and she just.. came onto me." you looked shocked. "you know what, you can stay with her." you shoved past him, your figure disappearing in the dark.

YANG JUNGWON

"jungwon!" you called out as you took off your shoes and sighed. jungwon had stood you up and left you stranded at the restaurant.

you made you way to you guys shared bedroom and opened the door "jungwo—" you paused and took in the scene before you. jungwon was kissing another girl in YOUR home.

"you can get your jaw up off the floor yn." he spoke up and walked towards you. "i dont know why your so confused, you know.. after our argument i was out and thought that i dont need a nagging women like you." he spat. "you can leave now."

NISHIMURA RIKI

"yn shut the fuck up okay!?" riki yelled at you "fuck! all i hear is 'who is she' this and 'why are you texting her' that." he got closer to you.

you started to get upset at his sudden tone. tears threatening to spill at any moment "r-riki..—" "have you ever thought that after all your constant nagging, and all your bossiness i wasnt gonna fall out of love?"

your breath hitched "your a joke to me yn. i knew i shouldve stayed with rei after the night of our argument. shes less annoying as you." he poked at your chest. and with every word a singular tear fell.

written by @sjyunnsworld DO NOT COPY OR TRANSLATE.

taglist : @k1ttylvr @cupidscourt

taglist form here

SECOND CHOICE

where riki cant get over his ex.

pair : ni-ki x fem!reader

warnings : angst , cheating , arguments

buns note : this is based off a chat i had with junos (@pnghoon) riki bot :3

you sat at the table with riki, food in hand as you placed it down. he smiled and licked his lips. "yum.. this used to be her favorite!" you froze at his words.

i sighed at his remark and put my hands in my lap "what is wrong with you riki!" i huffed out.

Riki’s eyebrows furrowed at your reaction and he tilted his head ever so slightly. “What do you mean?” Riki spoke, clearly not seeing the problem with what he just said.

"this used to be her favorite?" are you kidding me!?" riki was taken aback by your words and seemed genuinely confused. He opened his mouth as if he was about to say something but then stopped himself. “I..I don’t see what the problem is?”

"seriously? on every one of our dates you mention her, when i tie up my hair you mention her and even when im not doing anything you mention her!" you raised your voice and was staring to get frustrated with his innocent act.

“I..I’m sorry.. I didn’t realize I was doing that…” he mumbled apologetically, still refusing to look at you straight in the eyes.

"whatever lets just eat riki." i sighed and began to eat my food as he did too. He slowly took a bite out of his food before speaking up again “Can I ask you something..?” his words made me perk up.

"hm?.." i said as i swallowed my food. he reluctantly spoke up "do you ever.. get jealous?.." i quirk my brow and placed my fork down "why? do you think i get jealous?" he nodded slightly "you.. always get worked up when i bring up my ex." i rolled my eyes and stood up to throw away my plate.

"i dont get jealous, there's nothing to be jealous about.." i said looking back him "it just seems.. you would prefer to be with her than me.." your works shocked him, he shook his head and approached you "no babe.. thats not true i love you.." he lied. it was true. but he would rather die than admit that.

i shook my hand "just forget it riki" i walked to the bedroom to get ready to sleep, riki trailing behind me.

he sighed and grabbed your arm, stopping you "babe can we talk about this please?" "about what!? that you want to be back with your ex?" he huffed in annoyance "its not like that! your blowing things out of proportion."

"oh really? its not like that? then why do you feel the need to bring her up everytime i do something!?" he ran and hand through his hair in frustration.

"because i cant stop thinking about her okay!?" he yelled before rubbing his temple, leaving you in utter dismay "you cant be serious" "yn im so-" you shut him up by shoving past him , grabbing your outside shoes and phone "wait dont leave please!.." he grabbed your hand desperately.

"i hate you riki.. i wish i never met you."

written by @sjyunnsworld DO NOT COPY OR TRANSLATE

taglist : @k1ttylvr @cupidscourt @jakesangel @luvvsim

networks : @enchive

꒰‧⁺ Casual *ೃ༄

*ೃ summary: where your relationship with Jake is a 'no attachments' one

pairings: jake x fem!reader

word count: 1.1k

warnings: angst, some suggestive mentions, reader is Jay's little sister

Jake Sim was known around school for a range of different stuff: his abilities in soccer, his disponibility to tutor people in Math, his great looks and even greater personality and, most importantly, his inability to have one night stands and casual flings. 

Despite being very popular among the ladies, Jake was never one to sleep around. First of all, ‘cause he considered himself a gentleman and he couldn’t really fathom the idea of one night stands. Secondly, he cherished the intimacy of knowing and loving someone more than the physical aspect of his possible relationships. 

But against all that and his better judgment, Jake Sim found himself having a casual friends-with-benefits relationship with you. 

And it's not like he didn’t know what he was getting into when you first caught his attention. You were Jay’s little sister, who he always warned his friends was off limits: not only was he acting like the protective older brother, but also ‘cause he was afraid of needing to pick sides if things didn’t work. 

It all began in one of the many sleepovers he had with your brother and their other friends, when it was so late it was almost morning and all of the guys were scattered in mattresses in the middle of the living room and Jake went to the kitchen to get a cup of water. And even though it was your house too, he wasn’t expecting to find you sitting on the counter with a bowl of cereal, dressed only in an oversized T-shirt and a pair of fluffy socks.

Jake didn’t really expect you to ask him if he wanted cereal too, or for him to say yes, but then he found himself sitting by your side, eating and talking in a low volume not to wake up the guys. He didn’t expect to end up kissing you in the middle of the kitchen, his hands holding your face as you stood in front of him, his legs dangling from the counter he was still sitting on. 

He also didn’t expect to be caught by Heesung leaving your room in the morning, but still, there he was. What he did expect though was the face and scoff he received from him when Jake said that it was only a one time thing. 

But it didn’t take long for Jake to see that it wasn’t in fact a one time thing. It barely took a whole week in reality, as he had to work on a few group assignments from a class he shared with Jay. 

As your brother left the house to buy food for both of them, you left your room to greet Jake. At least that’s what you said when you straddled him and kissed him, making him a breathless blushing mess under you. It’s not like you had a lot of time, but it was enough to convince him to accompany you upstairs so you could help him with the raging boner he got from having you on top of him; and enough for Jay not to suspect a thing when he came back with chicken wings and lamen for them. 

And as weeks went by, Jake gave up on keeping count of how many kisses he shared with you and how many times he ended up on your bed when he really shouldn’t. It also became harder to hide what was happening from Jay, as Jake couldn’t really hide the way his eyes would follow you every time you moved, or how smily he became whenever you gave him an ounce of attention, or even how much of a coincidence it was that both you seemed to have hickeys around the same time period. 

So to say that he was shocked that Jay already knew everything was an understatement. Jake had spent a whole lot of time overthinking that conversation with your brother, planning what to say and how to run away if Jay wanted to punch him in the face, only for him to keep an uninterested face and say he knew. 

-My sister told me when I found one of your sweatshirts in her room last week. 

-And you’re not like, mad?

-Not at you bro, but at her? Totally. I told her not to fuck around with my friends, especially for her ‘no strings attached’ bullshit. 

And as relieved as Jake was that Jay was not going to kill him, something in what he said rubbed him in the wrong way, but he couldn’t really understand why. Was it the way that Jay looked at him, pity in his eyes? Was it the fact that, despite all the nights you spent laying naked by his side and talking about everything and nothing with him, you still considered your relationship just ‘casual’?

Maybe it was the way that, on the next sleepover the guys had, you came home laughing and holding hands with another guy. You froze on your tracks upon seeing your brother and his friends in the living room, and you blushed when you looked in Jake’s eyes. Or the way you apologized to the guy you were with, saying how you didn’t know your brother would have friends over, just for him to smile and say that it was fine and his roommate wasn’t home, and you left with him again. 

And Jake felt like shit when all his friends' eyes turned to him, worry stamped on their faces. But he forced a smile, grabbed one of the controllers and told his friends he was fine, despite none of them believing. 

-We’re just casual guys.

But he felt sort of grateful the next morning, when you were already back home and Jay thought the guys were still asleep in the living room and he could hear your brother scolding you about what happened. He just pretended to sleep when Jay came back and laid back on his mattress, his soft snoring soon being heard. And that was the moment you left your bedroom, as Jake could hear your steps and feel your eyes on him. 

-I know you’re awake Jake. Can we talk?

That’s how Jake ended up in your bed pounding on you, his mouth on yours to keep you as quiet as possible under him. He didn’t really pay attention to your apologies about last night, too focused on showing you that this casual thing you had would always be better than whatever other guys could do to you. He had to bite his tongue not to ask if it was worth it, if that guy could make you feel better than Jake could, settling for marking your body and watching as your eyes rolled and your body squirmed under his touch. 

 It was hard to ignore the way his friends looked at him when he left your room, a mix of disappointment and concern, and as he could still feel the way your body fitted on his hand and your taste on his tongue, he hoped that if he lied to his friends enough, he could convince himself too. 

-Don’t worry guys, I’m fine. It’s all casual. 

slipping away ໒ྀི sjy

𝓈ynopsis : in which jake continuously comes home late and doesn't make an effort anymore.

pt.2 !! 𝙱ℯ𝓎ℴ𝓃𝒹 ᴛʜᴇ ʙʀᴀᴋᴇ

content : fem!reader // angst // warnings : cheating // ᴡᴄ.1909

he promised he would be home by 8; it's currently 11:47.

this wasn't out of the ordinary. every night the same disappointment. eight would come and go, but he'd never walk through the door until 12, sometimes even 1.

the tv served as background noise as the clock continued to click. your eyes felt heavy as you continued to wait for him, not caring how many times he has told you not to.

…more under cut

you continuously glanced at your phone, even though you knew there wouldn't be any new messages. there never were.

part of you wanted to be angry, to finally say something when he walked through the door. but another part–maybe the weaker part–just hoped he had a good reason–you always gave him the benefit of the doubt. always.

you tried to push away the nagging thoughts creeping into your mind. what if he wasn't coming back? what if something happened? or worse… what if he was with someone else? but you quickly dismissed them. he wouldn't do that. not him.

but than again, why did it feel like he was slipping further away each night? why did the silence grow louder, the excuses more rehearsed? you knew you should be more assertive, confront him, but every time you gather the courage. it crumbled under the weight of your fears.

your fingers traced the edge of the couch, feeling the familiar texture of the worn fabric, memories of happier times flood your mind. times when he would rush home, eager to see you, when your laughter filled the room, and the hours slipped by unnoticed. those days felt so distant now, like a dream you couldn't quite remember upon walking.

the clock struck midnight, a final reminder he was late again. you sighed, a mix of sadness and doubt settling upon your chest. maybe tonight would be different, maybe he'd walk through that door with an explanation that actually made sense. or maybe tonight would be the night… you would finally stop waiting.

it was 12:38.. he finally walked through the door. his shoulders slumped as he took off his coat and placed his shoes in the cubby.

you walk up to him, hugging him so tightly, as if he would disappear at any moment. he hesitantly hugged you back, as if he didn't know who you were.

as you pulled away, you searched his face, hoping to find some reassurance, some sign that the man you fell in love with was still there. but his eyes were distant, unfocused, as if he was somewhere else entirely.  the words you had rehearsed a thousand times in your head–questions about where he had been, why was he late, if everything was late–died on your lips.

he gave you a tired smile, the type that never quite reached his eyes anymore. "sorry, work ran late," he muttered, his voice flat, devoid of any real apology. he brushed past you, heading towards the kitchen as if the conversation was already over.

you stood there for a moment, frozen, the air thick with words left unspoken. you wanted to scream, demand answers, to make him know how much this was affecting you, how much his careless actions hurt you. but instead you just followed him, watching as he poured himself a cup of water.

"did you eat?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

he nodded, not looking up. "yeah, grabbed something on the way,"

another lie, you thought. you knew he hadn’t eaten; you could see it in the way he avoided your eyes, in the way his hand trembled slightly as he set the glass down. but you didn’t push, didn’t call him out. you were too tired, too worn out from the endless cycle of waiting, worrying, and pretending that everything was okay.

you stood in the doorway, watching him as he leaned against the counter, his gaze fixed on the floor. he looked like a man who had the weight of the world on his shoulders, but you couldn’t shake the feeling that he was carrying something else too—something he wasn’t willing to share with you.

finally, he looked up, meeting your eyes for the briefest of moments before glancing away. "i'm gonna head to bed," he said, his voice hollow.

you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. "i'll be up in a bit."

he walked past you, his footsteps heavy, like every step was an effort. you listened as he climbed the stairs, the creak of the old wood echoing through the quiet house. when you heard the bedroom door close, you let out a breath you didn't realize you’d been holding.

alone in the silence, you felt the tears welling up, but you refused to let them fall. not tonight. not again.

you walked back to the living room, the tv still flickering with images you weren’t really watching. you sank onto the couch, pulling your knees to your chest, feeling small and fragile in the vast emptiness of the room.

you couldn’t keep doing this—waiting for a man who was already halfway out the door. but the thought of confronting him, of demanding the truth, terrified you. because deep down, you knew that whatever he said might shatter the fragile illusion you’d been clinging to for so long.

you wiped your eyes, determined not to cry. maybe tomorrow would be different. maybe tomorrow, you'd finally find the strength to ask him the questions you were too scared to ask tonight.

or maybe tomorrow, you'd finally accept the truth you’d been avoiding for far too long.

–

you had fallen asleep on the couch, too emotionally drained to move even an inch. the soft hum of the tv, now just static, was the only sound in the room, a quiet reminder of the night before.

when you woke, the sun was already creeping through the blinds, casting slivers of light across the living room. your body ached from the awkward position, and your mind felt just as heavy as when you’d closed your eyes. for a moment, you lay there, replaying what had happened last night repeatedly in your mind like a broken record.

you opened your phone to check the time–8:12, he had already left for work. you sigh and get up from the couch to freshen up.

as you were brushing your teeth, you got a message from an unknown person. you opend the message and almost dropped your phone in the sink.

it was a picture of jake. not just any picture tho, it was a picture of him and a girl. his arm wrapped around her waist as she was kissing his neck.

you stumble backwards, frozen and in shock. this had to be fake, someone was playing a trick on you. there was no way that was your jake, the jake you had given you entire heart to, the person you thought you would marry one day, the person you thought you knew.

your body started to shake as tears ran down your face. 

you tried to steady yourself, gripping the edge of the sink as your mind raced, desperately searching for some explanation that would make this all go away. but no matter how much you wanted to believe it was some cruel joke, the image on your phone was painfully real. the jake in that photo, the one with his arm around another girl, didn’t look like the man you thought you knew.

your hands trembled as you stared at the screen, the tears blurring your vision. How could he do this? How could he betray you like this after everything? Memories of the nights you spent waiting for him, worried and alone, flooded back to you. All those times he said he was working late, all the empty apologies… it all started to make sense now, but it didn’t make it hurt any less.

you sank to the floor, feeling like the ground had been ripped out from under you. the trust you had in him, the love you shared—it felt like it was all shattering into pieces. you wanted to scream, to throw your phone across the room, to do something, anything, to make the pain stop. but all you could do was sit there, numb and broken, as the tears kept falling.

your mind kept flashing back to the moments when you were so sure that he was the one—the way he used to make you laugh, the promises you made to each other, the dreams you shared about the future. you never imagined this would happen, that the person you loved the most would be the one to hurt you this deeply.

as you sat there, the shock slowly started to give way to anger. how could he lie to you like this? how could he throw away everything you had together for someone else? the image of him with that girl was burned into your mind, a painful reminder of his betrayal.

you knew you had to confront him, but the thought of facing him, of hearing whatever excuses he might try to give, made you feel sick. but you also knew you couldn’t just ignore this, couldn’t just pretend like it didn’t happen. 

wiping your tears, you forced yourself to stand, your legs feeling shaky beneath you. you didn’t know what you were going to say, or how you were going to handle this, but one thing was clear—you couldn’t keep living in the dark, waiting for him to come home, wondering where he really was. it was time to face the truth, no matter how painful it might be.

but as you stared at the photo one last time, something inside you snapped. you realized that you didn’t owe him a confrontation, didn’t need to hear his excuses or lies. he had already broken your heart—why give him the chance to hurt you even more?

you grabbed your suitcase from the closet and began tossing your clothes inside. every piece of clothing you threw into the suitcase felt like a small step toward reclaiming your life. you packed quickly, not allowing yourself to think too much, just acting on instinct

you grabbed your essentials, leaving behind anything that reminded you of him. there was no point in taking those memories with you. you wanted to leave it all behind—the lies, the heartbreak, the empty promises.

finally, with your suitcase packed, you took one last look around the room. the life you thought you had here was gone, shattered by a single photo. but as painful as it was, you knew you couldn’t stay. you couldn’t keep living in a place that no longer felt like home.

you left a note on the kitchen table, short and to the point: "I know. Don’t bother looking for me."

with that, you grabbed your suitcase, wiped away the last of your tears, and walked out the door. the sun was still shining, the world still turning, but everything had changed for you. you didn’t know where you were going, but you knew you had to get away, to start over somewhere new, where the pieces of your heart might have a chance to heal.

kpi’s notes 🗒️ : hi guys!! some angst cuz im feeling emo 👩🏽‍🎤 n e wayzzz hope you enjoyed it ❤️❤️❤️

𝙱ℯ𝓎ℴ𝓃𝒹 ᴛʜᴇ ʙʀᴀᴋᴇ 彡 lhs

𝚜ʏɴᴏᴘsɪs : after running away from your ex boyfriend who wasn’t faithful, you search for comfort through your best friend; lee heeseung.

sequel to : slipping away ໒ྀི sjy

ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ : fem!reader // angst, fluff ( a little bit ) // warnings : mentions of cheating, cursing, fighting // ᴡᴄ.2829

you didn’t know where else to go. your feet moved on autopilot, dragging you through the empty streets that seemed to stretch on forever. the suitcase in your hand felt like dead weight, each step heavier than the last, as if it were filled with all the pain you’d just been through. the hurt from that picture, the one that tore apart everything you thought you knew, was still fresh, like a wound that wouldn’t heal. staying in that house wasn’t an option—not with those messed-up memories haunting every corner, making it hard to breathe. ....more under cut

as you stumbled towards heeseung’s place, your path took you past jake’s office building. you couldn’t help but look up at the tall glass windows, now just a cold, empty reflection of the morning light. how many times had he told you he was stuck there, working late? the excuses, the lies, all seemed so obvious now. your mind replayed the image of him with her, over and over, like a bad movie you couldn’t turn off. tears pricked your eyes and started spilling over, sliding down your cheeks as you thought about that co-worker, the one he told you not to worry about.

the more you walked, the more your thoughts spiraled, pulling you into a dark place. was she really that much prettier than you? had you somehow stopped being enough for him? what did she do that made him think it was okay to throw away everything you had? each question stabbed at you, like a knife twisting deeper into your already broken heart. you wiped your face, smearing the tears, but they kept coming, hot and salty, and the weight in your chest only grew heavier.

the streets were too quiet, like the world was holding its breath, waiting for you to break. and you were so close. but you kept walking, one foot in front of the other, because standing still hurt even more.

when you finally reached heeseung’s apartment, you stood there for a moment, frozen in place. the morning was quiet, almost too quiet, and the sound of your knuckles against the door was too loud, breaking the stillness. but you didn’t care. you couldn’t care. you needed him. you needed someone to hold you together when it felt like you were falling apart. someone to tell you that you weren’t crazy, that leaving was the right thing to do.

the door opened, and there he was—lee heeseung, your best friend, the only person who had always been there for you, even when jake started slipping away. his eyes widened when he saw you standing there, your face streaked with tears, your body trembling like a leaf in the wind. he didn’t say a word. he didn’t need to. he just pulled you into his arms, holding you tight against his chest. the second you felt his embrace, something inside you snapped, and all the tears, all the pain, came flooding out like a wave you couldn’t stop.

you clung to him, crying uncontrollably, your fingers gripping his shirt like it was the only thing keeping you from falling apart. he held you like that for what felt like forever, his hand gently rubbing your back, his heartbeat steady against your ear. it was the only sound that made any sense.

after a long time, he gently pulled back, his hands holding your face. his touch was so soft, so careful, like he was afraid you might break if he wasn’t. “what happened?” he whispered, his voice filled with concern. he tried to meet your eyes, but you couldn’t. you just closed them, letting the tears flow down your face, soaking his fingers. you couldn’t speak, couldn’t find the words to describe the mess inside you. all you could do was cry, letting everything you’d been holding in finally spill over, hoping that somehow, in heeseung’s arms, you might find the strength to keep going.

“i saw a picture,” you finally said, your voice trembling. “of him... and her. he was holding her, like he used to hold me. she was kissing him, and he... he looked happy.”

the last word came out like a sob, choking on how bitter it felt. you squeezed your eyes shut, trying to block out the image that had been burned into your mind, but it was no use. it was there, haunting you, mocking you with every beat of your heart.

“fuck,” heeseung muttered under his breath, his voice thick with barely contained anger. “i’m so sorry.”

you shook your head, tears spilling over your cheeks. “i don’t even know why i’m surprised. he’s been pulling away for months, and i just... i just ignored it. i let him lie to me, over and over again. and now... now i feel so fucking stupid.”

heeseung’s hand moved to yours, his fingers wrapping around yours in a comforting squeeze. “you’re not stupid,” he said firmly, his voice steady despite the emotions swirling in his eyes. “you loved him, and you trusted him. that’s not something to be ashamed of.”

but you couldn’t help it. the shame, the guilt, the anger—it all felt like too much, crushing down on you from all sides. “i don’t even know who i am anymore,” you whispered, the confession tearing its way out of you. “i gave him everything, and now... i don’t have anything left.”

“you have me,” heeseung said quietly, but with a certainty that made you look up. his eyes were locked on yours, filled with a warmth and determination that cut through the fog in your mind. “you’ll always have me.”

for the first time in what felt like ages, something inside you shifted, like a small crack in the wall you’d built around your heart. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to let a sliver of light in, enough to remind you that maybe, just maybe, you weren’t as lost as you felt.

“thank you,” you whispered, squeezing his hand in return. the words felt small, but they were all you had to give right now.

heeseung just nodded, his gaze never leaving yours. “we’ll get through this,” he promised, his voice steady and sure. “together.”

and in that moment, sitting on that familiar couch with heeseung by your side, you felt the smallest flicker of hope. it wasn’t much, just a tiny spark in the darkness, but it was there. and maybe, with time, it would grow into something stronger. and for now, for now this was enough.

–

it’s been a week since everything fell apart, and you still haven’t spoken to jake. the days blur together, each one feeling like the last. you try to block out the memory of that picture, but it’s stuck in your mind, like a bad dream that lingers.

heeseung let you stay with him, giving you a place to hide from the pain. he’s been there for you, never asking for more than you can give. he doesn’t push you to talk or to face all the hurt that’s tangled up inside. instead, he stays nearby, his presence like a soft blanket on a cold night, keeping you grounded when everything else feels like it’s spinning out of control.

every time your phone buzzes, your heart jumps, hoping it’s jake, finally ready to explain. but it never is. it’s like he’s disappeared, leaving behind nothing but the broken pieces of what you thought you had.

every day, heeseung gently nudges you to leave the apartment, to get some air, to stop you from just existing in the space. “you can’t stay cooped up forever,” he said, his voice soft but firm.

finally, after days of retreating into yourself, you decided to go. the walls felt like they were closing in, suffocating you, and maybe he was right. maybe fresh air would help, if only a little.

"okay," you said one afternoon, your voice barely above a whisper. heeseung's eyes brightened in relief, though he tried not to show it too much. "let’s go for that walk."

the air outside was cool, and the sunlight felt strange against your skin after being inside for so long. with each step, the weight in your chest lifted just a bit. heeseung stayed beside you, quiet, letting you set the pace. as you were walking, heeseung offered to go to a cafe around the corner, you agreed.

but then, as you turned the corner, your heart stopped. there he was. jake, walking out of the cafe, laughing with the same girl from the picture. the world seemed to freeze for a second, your breath catching in your throat as your eyes met his.

heeseung saw him too. his body tensed next to you, and for a moment, you felt his hand brush against yours, as if he was ready to pull you away or shield you from what was about to happen.

jake stopped laughing the second he saw you, his face paling as he realized who was standing in front of him. the girl beside him looked confused, glancing between you and jake, oblivious to the tension crackling in the air.

"yn..." jake’s voice trembled, like he wasn’t ready to face you. his eyes darted between you and heeseung, panic settling in. the girl beside him, still clueless, tugged at his arm, but he gently pulled away from her.

he took a step toward you, his mouth opening to speak again, but before he could, heeseung stepped in front of you, his body stiff and protective. "don't," heeseung said, his voice low and sharp. "you don’t get to just walk up to her after what you did"

jake's face tightened with regret, and he raised his hands in surrender. "i know i messed up, heeseung. i just want to talk to her. i need to explain—“

"explain?" heeseung’s voice cut through the air, sharp as a knife. "what could you possibly explain? that you lied to her? that you went behind her back? you don't get to apologize now, jake. you’re too late."

you felt frozen between them, unable to speak, the weight of the moment pressing down on your chest. jake took another step closer, his eyes pleading with you now. "yn, please, just let me talk. i never meant to hurt you."

before you could respond, heeseung shoved jake back, his jaw clenched. "don’t even try it." the sudden movement startled jake, and for a moment, it looked like he might back down, but then his face hardened, and he shoved heeseung back.

"stay out of this, heeseung," jake growled, his calm facade slipping. "this is between me and her."

"it stopped being about you and her the second you decided to cheat," heeseung snapped. and before you could even process what was happening, heeseung swung at jake, his fist connecting with jake’s jaw.

jake stumbled back, wiping the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand. the tension snapped, and suddenly the two were on each other, fists flying, each punch fueled by anger and betrayal. you screamed their names, trying to pull them apart, but they were too lost in the fight to hear you.

the girl jake had been with stood frozen in shock, her eyes wide as the fight escalated.

it wasn’t until a cafe worker rushed out, clearly alarmed by the scene, that the fight broke up. the worker, a tall man with a stern expression, grabbed heeseung by the arm, yanking him back with surprising strength. "hey, that’s enough!" he shouted, his voice cutting through the chaos.

another worker stepped between jake and heeseung, forcing distance between them. heeseung was breathing heavily, his knuckles red from the impact, while jake stood on the other side, his face bruised and bleeding.

"don’t come near her again," heeseung spat, his voice shaking with anger.

jake’s eyes flickered to you, filled with regret and pain, but he said nothing. he turned and walked away, the girl trailing behind him.

— jake's pov

jake sat at his desk, staring at the empty coffee cup in front of him, his fingers tracing the rim absentmindedly. he hadn’t been able to focus on anything all week. his phone sat next to him, screen black, no new messages—just like every other day since you had left.

you were gone. really gone.

he rubbed his face with his hands, exhaustion weighing down his entire body. the office around him was buzzing with activity, but everything felt muffled, distant. all he could think about was you. the way you used to smile when he’d walk through the door, the quiet mornings they’d share before life got too busy. but those moments felt like a distant memory now, like something he could never get back.

he had tried to explain, tried to apologize. but none of his words had reached you. the look on your face when you found out—when you *really knew what he had done—was etched into his mind. the hurt, the betrayal. he had destroyed everything.

he’d messed up. he knew it. and now, the reality of losing you was suffocating.

his eyes flicked to his phone again, hoping—no, praying—that there’d be a message from you. but the screen remained blank, the silence louder than anything he’d ever experienced. he thought back to that day at the cafe, when he saw you again with heeseung. seeing you there, seeing you so close to someone else, had broken something inside him.

heeseung had always been around, always been that solid, dependable guy for you. and now, as much as he hated to admit it, he knew heeseung was there for her in ways he hadn’t been. jake clenched his fists, remembering the fight, the way heeseung had looked at him with pure hatred. he deserved it. every punch, every harsh word—it was what he deserved for letting her slip away.

but the worst part was knowing that you had walked away from him. the one person who had believed in him, who had given him her whole heart, was gone. and it wasn’t just the physical distance that hurt. it was knowing that you’d probably never forgive him. that he had broken something too deeply to ever fix.

jake leaned back in his chair, staring blankly at the ceiling. the loneliness pressed in on him, the regret gnawing at his insides. you had been everything—his anchor, his calm in the storm. and now, without you, everything felt wrong.

—

as you and heeseung walked together, the weight of your past started to feel lighter, heeseung couldn’t shake off the knot of sadness that had settled in his chest. despite everything, despite how jake had hurt you, he saw the way you still had lingering feelings for him. it wasn’t just about the anger or betrayal; it was the fact that jake’s presence still had a hold on your heart, even now.

heeseung had always been there for you, quietly harboring his own feelings, watching as you tried to mend a broken heart. now, as he saw the pain in your eyes, he couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness. he wanted to be the one to heal your wounds, to be the one who could make you smile again without the shadows of jake's memory lingering over you.

heeseung walked beside you, his thoughts heavy with unspoken emotions. he couldn’t deny the ache in his heart, the longing to be more than just a friend to you. but he also understood that you needed time, space, and healing. he had to be patient, even if it meant wrestling with his own heartache.

the cafe and the fight seemed like distant memories now, fading as you and heeseung continued to walk together. with each step, heeseung vowed to be there for you, no matter what. even if it meant watching from the sidelines as you sorted out your feelings for someone else, he would stand by you, offering his support and hoping that, one day, you might see him for more than just a friend.

the city’s noise came back into focus, but for now, the two of you walked on in silence, finding solace in each other’s presence. and as heeseung held your hand, he felt a glimmer of hope that, with time, things might change. for now, he would be there for you, every step of the way.

but even as he walked beside you, he couldn’t escape the gnawing feeling of inadequacy, the ever-present reminder that he was only a bystander in the wreckage of your heart. every moment with you was bittersweet, filled with the hope that one day you might see him differently, but also the crushing reality that he could never fully erase the pain jake had caused. heeseung’s heart ached with a sorrowful longing, knowing that while he could offer his support, the love he wished he could give you might always remain just out of reach.

kpi’s notes 🗒️: HI GUYS!! sooooo did you guys like it?? i know i know, its not a completely happy ending, but its not THAT sad. i just wanna say TYSM for all of the love and support you gave to “slipping away”, it really makes me happy to know people actually enjoy my writing 😊😊

taglist (bold = couldn’t tag) : @t1iqaa @orimuraa @silquids @vixensss @iilwji @milanco @femmefqtqle @whateverhoon @judedu4rte @who-tf-soddhi @itjengirl @eneoha @jooniesbears-blog @river-demon-slayer @mylettterstoyou @hoonsdrnkdzd @heebambilee @haeeeeefer @pinksweetlittlepiano @jungwonsgff @hmusunoo @jayshadoww @alexiskook21 @02zluvbot @urrluverrr

lee heeseung; autumn heartbreaks.

pairing: lee heeseung x reader

genre: angst, lovers to strangers

synopsis: where the only person you could ever imagine loving, breaks your heart.

trigger warning(s): n/a

word count: 1.3k words

a/n: this stayed in my drafts for weeks, decided to work on it today and here we are. ITS SO CRINGE I CANT HELP IT

yours and his life was once all about each other.

morning picnic dates but he forgets to pack the strawberry jam,

coffee dates during fall when he'd wrap his scarf around your neck even though you already had one but it was only another excuse to pull you in close and give you a kiss, he'd smile cheekily right after pulling away. oh how you loved his smile.

library dates during finals week because he insisted on helping you study,

waking up every morning to see him already staring and admiring your features with so much love in his eyes. "morning, doll" he'd always say every morning with a soft smile as his hand reaches out to your face to move your hair from your face delicately

kissing on his rooftop during new years eve as fireworks lit up in the night skies

those days where you'd get into little quarrels and he'd always show up at your doorsteps with snacks in his hands, especially banana milk and chocolate. and you'd always end up forgiving him because you could never seem to stay mad at him.

taking your dog out on walks around the park and stopping by some food stands to get some churros,

baking chocolate cupcakes, dancing around your kitchen island and swaying side to side with his hands on your waist and yours on his shoulders as he plays his playlist that he made thinking of you in the background. staring into his eyes made you want to give in whatever you had to make those moments last forever.

those glowing bambi eyes that once felt like they held a thousand galaxies behind them. his gaze that was once so full of love whenever he was with you, was now all dull and felt as if there were no emotions in him at all.

your worst fear was that he'd fall out of love.

your worst fear was that one day, heeseung would find someone else that was better for himself, someone he loved more. and no matter how hard you've tried to be his ideal type, no matter how much you've always tried to be that someone, he was out of your league.

you've always been there for him, you've seen every side of him and stuck with him no matter what. you showed him all the love you ever could to anybody, and yet that somehow wasn't enough.

you weren't enough.

-

you find yourself waiting on your boyfriend to get home safely again, and hes late, like he's always been.

heeseung's been tired lately, you can't really do anything about it since its been stressful at work for him and of course you wanted to treat him well especially during these hard times. it was the least you thought you could do.

you made plans of what you were gonna cook him day to day, made plans of how you were gonna shower him with gifts and movie nights, you made sure to make the bed, did his laundry although he insists, did everything at home despite your study schedule and made sure he was comfortable as soon as he got home.

just as you were done cooking something up in the kitchen while waiting for him to get home, the apartment door opened.

"heeseung! you wanna watch a movie together? look i made ramen and some-" "y/n, we need to talk"

your heart dropped. his tone was unusual, sending an uneasy feeling to your guts.

you stared at him in concern, the look in his eyes were unreadable.

"we can talk about it over some ramen," you gave a warm smile as you walked over to arrange the table, hoping that looking away could cover up the fear you had deep down because you could guess the words that he was going to mutter out next.

and you were saying whatever for for him to not say it even if you already knew.

"let's break up" he said in monotone, looking away from your figure avoiding eye contact.

you froze in place and turned to look at him and all you could mutter out was his name

"hee..."

"i'm sorry"

"is it something i did? i promise you i can fix it if you'd just tell-"

"its not something you did y/n,"

"then.."

"i.. i fell out of love."

he fell out of love. and all you could reply back that day was "oh."

you swore you saw tears in his eyes, all he could say in context to why were just his apologies.

why was he crying? he's the one hurting you most and he knew it. yet all he could spill out were his apologies that would never fix anything.

four years worth, and all he could say is sorry. no better explanation. just his useless apology.

after that he just left. leaving you in tears with the heavy burden on your chest. you hated him for that but all you had to blame was yourself. were you not good enough? did he find someone new? all those questions hanged around your mind.

he just left you alone in your apartment and from that day on, everything you did reminded you of him, all those memories haunted you everywhere you went or did and all you could do about it was cry yourself back to sleep for god knows for how long.

its been a year since it all happened.

your bestfriend, ryujin convinced you to move out of you apartment and helped you pick yourself back up. staying in that apartment would only lead to endless days of skipping meals, classes and crying yourself to sleep. whatever you did was just going to end up in tears and breakdowns.

you've been better and managed to pull yourself back together and focus on your studies. you worked a part time job in a cafe with ryujin and heeseung wasn't much of a burden for you anymore. the thought of him still made you feel heavy and hurt. but at least he everywhere you looked now didn't remind you of him.

-

[9:30 PM]

it was just like every other weekend, you took up an extra shift since you were free. you closed up the cafe, now on your way home to your shared apartment with ryujin. it was autumn again, leaves were falling and it was cold, cozy. you tucked your hands into your coat as you walked down the streets, street lights lighting up the path as you walked along it quietly, admiring the autumn scenery as the cold wind lightly blew on your hair.

reminded you of that winter night two years ago when you were the happiest, with him of course.

the memories lingered in your head and instead of crying like you used to, it made you feel heavy, but those memories made you feel warm and you managed to smile upon thinking about it.

you can't help but miss the way he'd gaze at you, you missed his gentle hands moving your hair away from your face, you missed the love you felt in his gaze whenever he looked at you. but now, those loving eyes were no longer meant for you.

you treasured every single second with him, and you genuinely loved him. and you can't lie to yourself, if he was to call you and told you to come over right now because he wasn't feeling okay, you'd definitely find yourself running back to him with no second thoughts. he still owned your heart like no one else's.

but now, at least he's happier and thats all that really mattered to you.

he fell out of love. and there was nothing you or himself could do about it. it was what it was.

he was out of your league, and no matter how much you tried to be enough for him, you just weren't the one.

it was nice while it lasted, you experienced what love felt like and how much it could hurt.

it hurts for you to think about it and you dread thinking about it, but he wasn't yours. no matter how much you loved him and cared for him,

those loving eyes just weren't yours.

-

check this playlist i made out if u wanna! i think it suits this fic :)

& check out this playlist!!!! (pls)

taglist (open!) @sunwoahkim @chanshyuck @squiishymeow @maiverie @thicccdiccdaddy27

----- ⁎⁺˳✧༚ T5U'S MASTERLIST ⁎⁺˳✧༚ -----

keys: [f] fluff , [a] angst note: i mainly write for enha ✿ i dont write nsfw !!

♥︎ HEESEUNG 이희승 [LEE HEESEUNG] 🦌

⌦ [a] autumn hearbreaks. || pairing: ex boyfriend! heeseung x fem!reader ↳ synopsis: where the only person you could ever imagine loving, breaks your heart.

⌦ [f] heart eyes. || pairing: bestfriend! heeseung x fem!reader ↳ sypnosis: in where the both of you have nothing but love in your eyes whenever you looked at each other, and all flaws turn into perfection. but it took you both long enough, so heeseung decides to confess at the perfect time

♥︎ JAY 박종성 [PARK JONGSEONG] 🦅

⌦ [f] winter stargazing, with you. || pairing: boyfriend!jay x fem! reader ↳ sypnosis: late night stargazing with your boyfriend.

♥︎ JAKE 심재윤 [SIM JAEYUN] 🦮

⌦ [f] paper butterflies. || pairing: golden retriever boyfriend! jake x fem!reader ↳ sypnosis: where your boyfriend is adorably in love with you.

♥︎ SUNGHOON 박성훈 [PARK SUNGHOON] 🐧

⌦ [f] to the moon, never back. || pairing: boyfriend!sunghoon x fem!reader ↳ sypnosis: another night under the moonlight, with your one and only lover.

♥︎ SUNOO 김선우 [KIM SUNOO] 🦊

⌦ [f] love letters. || pairing: long time crush!sunoo x fem!reader ↳ sypnosis: you've liked sunoo for as long as you could remember. you wrote him love letters, bought him snacks almost everyday, all anonymously with no expectations of reciprocation. i mean, he receives pilling love notes everyday, what makes you any special? you weren't popular or the prettiest, or the smartest or anything. it would be shocking if the boy even remembers your name. but it all changes when you decided to write him a love letter you worked on, basically a recap of all the love notes, of all the paragraphs you wrote in your diaries through out the years that were about him. as you slid your love letter into his locker, he was right behind you.

♥︎ JUNGWON 양정원 [YANG JUNGWON] 🐏

⌦ [f] shoelaces. || pairing: class president!jungwon x fem!reader ↳ synopsis: turns out that your class president's feelings were mutual after all.

♥︎ NI-KI 西村力 (にしむら りき) [NISHIMURA RIKI] 🐥

⌦ [f] photobooths. || pairing: bestfriend!riki x fem!reader ↳ synopsis: riki was your one and only bestfriend, you basically went everywhere and did everything together ever since both of your parents met. it was going to be hard to not catch feelings when you spent almost every single hour of everyday with him, so you did. one accident at the amusement park where you two accidentally kissed caused a week of him ghosting you. scared of losing him if you happened to confess your feelings for the boy, you promised yourself not to. until one day when he decided to take you to the same amusement park after school. little did you know, it was where it all began for riki.

© t5u ♡(♡)

── ❝ ꒰ 𝒯𝐻𝐸𝑌 𝑆𝐴𝑌 𝑆𝑂𝑀𝐸𝑇𝐻𝐼𝑁𝐺 𝐻𝑈𝑅𝑇𝐹𝑈𝐿 𝐷𝑈𝑅𝐼𝑁𝐺 𝐴𝑁 𝒜𝑅𝐺𝑈𝑀𝐸𝑁𝑇 .ᐟㅤ ៸៸﹙ 엔하이픈 ﹚ ᶻ𐰁

GENRE ៸៸ angst ៸ hyung line ﹔ SYPNOSIS┆in which they hurt your feelings during an argument .ᐟㅤ ꒰ WORD COUNT﹕1-2k per member ꒱── 𝓦ARNING(S) not edited ៸ arguing ៸ pet names ៸ they say mean things to yn:c ៸ . ݁ ✦ ݁ . ⊱ LIBRARY . . . ﹕LUNA 💭 — i can’t write a fic under 1k for the life of me this is like 4k all together LOL.. 𖥔 ݁˖ maknae line !

୨୧ ‎이희승 ── 𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆

you and heeseung had been having a rough week. he had been busy with schedules, and you were busy drowning in your own work, leaving little time for the two of you to really connect.

when you finally had a day off together, you hoped it would be a chance to spend some long awaited quality time together, but it didn't go as planned.

you had been cooking dinner, trying to do something special to lighten the dull mood between you both, but heeseung was glued to his phone, responding to messages and scrolling through social media, barely sparing you a glance.

you tried to ignore it, reminding yourself that he was probably tired, but when you asked him if he could help set the table and he barely looked up, muttering something dismissive, frustration bubbled up inside you.

“heeseung, can we talk for a second?” you asked, trying to keep your voice calm.

“about what?” he sighed, still not fully putting his attention on you.

“about us,” you said quietly, putting down the wooden spoon you had been stirring with. ─── 𝙈𝙊𝙍𝙀 𝙐𝙉𝘿𝙀𝙍 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝘾𝙐𝙏 !

“i feel like… like you haven’t been here with me lately. i know you're busy, but it feels like whenever we do have time together, you’re distant. like i’m the only one trying.”

that finally got his attention. he placed his phone down, but his expression was tired and frustrated.

“what are you talking about? i’m here, aren’t i? i’m sitting right here.”

“that’s not what i mean and you know it,” you said, hurt creeping into your voice. “i just… i miss you, heeseung. it feels like i’m always the one reaching out, trying to keep us connected, and you’re just… i don’t know, drifting away.”

heeseung rubbed his temples, the stress of the week weighing on him. he wasn’t in the mood to talk about emotions right now, especially when he felt like he was already giving everything he could.

“y/n, can you like..not do this right now? i’ve had a long day, and i don’t have the energy for this.”

your heart clenched at his dismissive tone. “this isn’t just about today, though,” you pressed gently.

“it’s been building up for a while now. i just… i need to know that you still care, that you still want this as much as i do.”

heeseung stood up abruptly, his chair scraping against the floor. he could feel the pressure building up inside him, and in a moment of frustration, he snapped.

“you’re so clingy! i can’t breathe without you wanting something from me. can’t you just leave me alone for once?”

the words had cut deep, freezing you in place. you stood there, staring at him, disbelief and hurt flashing across your face. you felt the sting of tears welling up, but you swallowed them down, refusing to let them fall in front of him.

“clingy?” you repeated softly, more to yourself than to him. you took a step back, your hands falling to your sides, trembling. “i… i didn’t know you felt that way.”

heeseung’s anger disappeared the moment he saw the look on your face. the realization of what he had just said hit him like a ton of bricks.

he hadn’t meant it. not at all. he was just frustrated and overwhelmed, but that didn’t excuse the fact that he had just hurt the person he loved most. “y/n, wait—”

but you were already turning away, your shoulders hunched as you walked out of the tension filled kitchen.

he heard the soft click of the bedroom door closing behind you, and the silence that followed was suffocating.

heeseung stood there, frozen for a moment, his heart pounding with regret. he pushed a hand through his hair, cursing himself under his breath. how could he have said something so cruel and mean to you? you were just trying to talk, trying to reach out to him, and he had shut you down in the worst way possible.

after pacing back and forth in the living room for what felt like forever, heeseung couldn’t take it anymore. he needed to fix this. he couldn’t let the argument hang in the air between you both like a dark cloud.

he approached the bedroom door hesitantly and knocked softly. “y/n?” he called out gently, but there was no response.

he tried again, this time opening the door just a crack. he saw you lying on the bed, your back to the door, curled up tightly in the blankets piled on top of you.

his chest ached in complete and utter regret seeing you like this, knowing that he was the reason for your pain. slowly, he walked into the room, sitting down on the edge of the bed. for a moment, he just sat there, unsure of how to begin. the words felt heavy in his throat, but he knew he had to say them.

“y/n,” he whispered softly, his voice thick with emotion. “i’m so sorry.” he waited for a response, but when none came, he continued.

“i didn’t mean what i said. you’re not clingy, and you don’t suffocate me. i was just… i don’t know. i’ve been feeling overwhelmed lately, but that’s no excuse to take it out on you.”

he reached out, hesitating for a second before gently placing his hand on your arm. “please, can we talk? i know i hurt you, and i’ll do anything to make it right. i love you so much, and i hate that i made you feel this way.”

you remained quiet for a few moments, your back still turned to him. heeseung’s heart pounded in his chest as he waited, afraid that you might not forgive him.

but then, slowly, you turned around to face him. your eyes were red and puffy from crying, and the sight made his heart twist with guilt.

“you really hurt me this time, heeseung,” you said quietly, your voice trembling.

“i wasn’t trying to be clingy. i was just trying to tell you how i felt.”

“i know, baby..” he said softly, scooting closer to you on the bed. “and i’m so sorry. you didn’t deserve that. i should’ve listened to you instead of shutting you out. i love you, y/n, and i want to be better for you.”

you looked at him for a long moment, searching his eyes for sincerity. finally, you let out a small sigh and nodded, though the hurt was still lingering in your eyes.

“i just need you to be more present with me,” you whispered. “i don’t need grand gestures, just… your attention, and your time.”

heeseung reached out and pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly against his chest. “i promise,” he murmured into your hair.

“i’ll do better. i’ll make more time for us. you’re the most important thing to me, and i don’t want you to ever feel like you have to fight for my attention. i’m here, y/n. i love you.”

as he held you in his arms, you could feel the sincerity in his words. the hurt was still there—no doubt, but the warmth of his embrace and the steady beat of his heart against yours slowly began to soothe the ache of the pain.

you wrapped your arms around him, burying your face in his chest. “i love you too, heeseung,” you whispered, the words muffled but heartfelt.

the two of you stayed like that, wrapped up in each other. the argument was still fresh, but the love between you both was stronger. heeseung gently stroked your hair, pressing soft kisses to your forehead as he whispered promises to never take you for granted again. it wasn’t a perfect fix, but it was the first step toward healing.

୨୧ ‎박종성 ── 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐒𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐆

you and jay didn’t argue often. he was usually always calm, collected, and understanding, but everyone has their breaking points, and tonight, jay unfortunately reached his. it started with something small—just a simple misunderstanding, but it quickly spiraled into a full-blown argument.

you had been frustrated about him coming home late for the third night in a row without letting you know. you didn’t mind that he was busy, you just wanted him to communicate with you. but he didn’t see it that way.

“you never tell me when you’re going to be late, jay,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady, though frustration couldn’t help but seep through.

“it feels like you don’t care enough to even send a message.”

jay let out a tired sigh, tossing his jacket onto the couch. he had been running on very little to few hours of sleep for the past few days, and the last thing he needed was an argument with you. “i’ve been busy, y/n. it’s not that deep. i’m doing my best, okay?”

“your best?” you echoed, your heart tightening. “i’m really not asking for much, jay. just a simple text so i’m not left wondering when you’ll come home. i’m tired of feeling like i’m the last priority.”

jay’s patience was wearing thin. he felt like no matter what he did, it wasn’t enough. “you’re overreacting,” he snapped, his voice sharp.

“you act like i’m purposely ignoring you. maybe i don’t text because i don’t want to deal with this constant nagging every time i’m a little late.”

your breath caught in your throat at the word "nagging." it was like a slap to the face. you stood there, stunned, the hurt quickly welling up inside of you.

“nagging?” you repeated quietly. “that’s how you see it?”

jay realized his mistake the moment the words left his mouth. he hadn’t meant to use that word. he knew it wasn’t fair to you, especially when all you wanted was a little consideration.

but it was too late. he saw the pain in your eyes as you turned away from him, trying to hide the tears that had started to form.

“y/n, wait—” jay stepped forward, reaching out to you, but you shook your head, holding up a hand to stop him.

“no,” you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “i just need some space right now, okay?”

you walked away, leaving him standing alone in the living room, the weight of his words hanging heavy in the air. jay ran a hand through his hair, frustration and guilt mixing together.

he hadn’t meant any of it. he knew you weren’t nagging—you were just asking for something simple. he had let his exhaustion and frustration get the best of him, and now he had hurt you.

jay paced in the living room for a few minutes, replaying the argument in his mind. every second that passed only made him feel worse.

how could he have let it escalate like that? you didn’t deserve to feel like you were nagging him just for asking for basic communication.

finally, after giving you some time to cool off, jay decided he couldn’t let the night end like this. he knocked gently on the bedroom door before slowly opening it.

you were sitting on the edge of the bed, your face buried in your hands. his heart broke seeing you like that.

“y/n, honey..” he said softly, stepping into the room. “can i come in?”

you didn’t respond, but you didn’t tell him to leave either, so he took that as a sign to approach. he sat down beside you hesitantly, keeping a respectful distance, not wanting to invade your space.

“i’m sorry,” he said, his voice sincere and filled with regret. “i shouldn’t have said what i did. you’re not nagging me. you’re just asking for something simple, and i failed to see that because i was too caught up in my own stress. it wasn’t fair to you.”

you stayed silent for a moment before finally lifting your head to look at him. your eyes were red from crying, and the sight only made jay feel worse.

“i wasn’t trying to make your life harder,” you said quietly. “i just wanted to know that you care enough to let me know when you’re going to be late. i didn’t think that would be too much to ask.”

“it’s not honey, you were right..” jay agreed, his heart heavy with guilt. “it’s not too much at all. i’ve been so caught up in everything else that i lost sight of what really matters—you. i promise i’ll do better. i’ll text you, i’ll communicate more, and i’ll make sure you never feel like an afterthought again. i’m so sorry for making you feel like i didn’t care.”

you could hear the sincerity in his voice, and though the hurt was still there, you could see that he truly regretted his words. you took a deep breath and nodded slowly.

“i just need you to be more present with me,” you said. “that’s all i ask.”

jay reached out hesitantly, gently taking your hand in his. “i promise,” he said softly, giving your hand a reassuring squeeze.

“i’ll be more present. you mean everything to me, y/n. i love you, and i never want to make you feel like this again.”

you looked into his eyes and saw the honesty there. the warmth of his hand holding yours helped soothe some of the hurt, and though it would take time to fully heal and get over his hurtful words, you knew jay was committed to making things right.

“i love you too,” you whispered, leaning into him. he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead. “thank you for listening.”

“always,” he murmured, holding you tightly against him. “i’ll always listen. i promise.”

୨୧ ‎심재윤 ── 𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐌

jake had always been your rock—kind, supportive, and gentle. but even the most patient people had their moments, and tonight was one of those rare nights where the tension between you two came to a head.

the argument started because of miscommunication. jake had promised to join you for a special dinner you’d planned, but he ended up canceling last minute due to a last-minute meeting.

you understood that his schedule was most of the time unpredictable, but this was the third time this month, and you just couldn’t help but feel neglected.

“i just wish you’d let me know earlier,” you said, trying to stay calm, though frustration was evident in your voice. “i spent the whole day preparing for tonight, and now you’re telling me last minute that you can’t make it?”

jake sighed, running a hand through his hair. he was exhausted from the long day he went though and simply didn’t have the energy for an argument.

“i told you, y/n, it wasn’t in my control. my schedule changed, and i didn’t know until the last minute. it’s not like i wanted to cancel.”

“i’m not saying you wanted to,” you replied, feeling your own patience starting to thin. “but it feels like i’m the one who’s always adjusting for you. you don’t even try to make it up to me afterward. it’s like my efforts don’t matter.”

that hit a nerve. jake had been stretched thin lately, trying to juggle everything, and the idea that you thought he didn’t care about your efforts made him snap.

“do you have any idea how hard i’m trying to balance everything?” he snapped, his voice harsher than he intended.

“it’s not like i’m just sitting around doing nothing. maybe you need to stop being so needy all the time. not everything revolves around you.”

the second those words left his mouth, jake instantly regretted them. he watched as your face fell, your expression crumpling as you processed what he just said. you took a step back, hurt and disbelief written all over your face.

“needy?” you whispered, your voice barely audible. “i’m needy for wanting to spend time with you? for wanting to be a priority in your life?”

jake felt his heart drop to his stomach as he saw tears welling up in your eyes. he had never meant to hurt you like this. you didn’t say another word before turning on your heel and walking out of the room. the sound of the door softly closing behind you felt like a slap to the face, leaving jake standing there, filled with regret.

he stood there in silence, replaying the argument in his mind. how could he have said something so hurtful to you? you weren’t needy. you just wanted his time and attention, and he had failed to give that to you. he realized how unfair he had been, taking out his stress on you— neglecting you instead of communicating properly.

after a few minutes of wrestling with his guilt, jake couldn’t take it anymore. he needed to fix this. he found you sitting on the edge of the bed, your head in your hands, shoulders shaking with silent sobs. the sight of you crying because of him made his chest ache.

he approached slowly, kneeling down in front of you. “baby,” he said softly, his voice thick with remorse. “i’m so, so sorry.” he reached for your hands, gently pulling them away from your face so he could look at you.

“i didn’t mean what i said. you’re not needy— not at all.. i was just frustrated and stressed, but that’s no excuse for saying something so hurtful.”

you looked down at him, your eyes red and swollen from crying. “it really hurt, jake,” you whispered. “all i wanted was to spend some time with you, and you made me feel like i was asking for too much.”

jake’s heart clenched at your words. he squeezed your hands tightly, his voice filled with regret.

“you weren’t asking for too much. i was being selfish and insensitive. i’ve been so caught up in everything else that i lost sight of what really matters—us. i don’t want you to ever feel like you’re not important to me, because you are. you’re the most important person in my life.”

you sniffled, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand as you listened to his apology. “i just feel like i’m always the one compromising, and i’m starting to feel like i don’t matter as much.”

jake shook his head, his expression serious. “you do matter. more than anything. i’ve just been overwhelmed lately, but that’s no excuse. i should’ve been more considerate of your feelings.”

he hesitated for a moment before continuing, “i’ll make it up to you, y/n. i’ll plan a special day just for us, and i promise i’ll communicate better. i never want you to feel like you’re the only one trying.”

you looked into his eyes, searching for sincerity, and you could see how much he truly regretted his words. though the pain was still fresh, his heartfelt apology soothed some of the hurt.

“i just want us to be a team,” you said quietly. “i don’t want to feel like i’m always on the sidelines, waiting for you to make time for me.”

jake nodded, his grip on your hands tightening as he leaned closer. “i want that too,” he said with desperation.

“i’m going to do better, i promise. i love you, y/n. please, forgive me for what i said.”

you could see the sincerity in his eyes, and though it would take time to fully forgive jake and the hurt he had unintentionally caused you, you knew jake meant every word.

slowly, you nodded, giving him a small, shy smile. “i forgive you,” you whispered.

jake let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding, relief flooding through him. he pulled you into his arms, holding you tightly as if he was afraid to let you go.

“thank you, my love—” he murmured into your hair. “i’ll spend the rest of my life making sure you never feel like that again.”

you hugged him back, resting your head against his chest as you both sat there in silence, wrapped in each other’s warmth.

the arguments words still lingered in the air, but you two were strong enough to overcome it.

jake pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, promising himself that he would never let his frustrations get in the way of your relationship again.

୨୧ ‎박성훈 ── 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍

sunghoon had always been reserved. he wasn’t the type to express his feelings openly, he struggled— and while you understood that when you first got together, lately, his coldness had started to weigh on you.

you couldn’t remember the last time he had initiated affection—a hug, a kiss, even holding hands.

it felt like he was pulling further and further away, and you couldn’t help but feel like maybe you were the problem.

one evening, after a long day of feeling emotionally distant from him, you finally decided to talk to him about it.

you had been sitting together on the couch, watching a movie in silence, and though you were physically close, the emotional gap between you felt like an ocean.

“hoon,” you said softly, turning to face him. “can we talk?”

he glanced at you, his expression neutral, as if he wasn’t sure what you were going to say.

“what’s on your mind?” he asked, his voice calm but distant.

you took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. “lately, it feels like… you’re not really here with me,” you said carefully.

“i..i know you’re not the most affectionate person, but it’s been hard, sunghoon. i miss you. i miss the way we used to be.”

sunghoon sighed, as if your words had no affect—leaning back against the couch. “i’m still here,” he said simply, his tone almost indifferent. “i haven’t gone anywhere.”

“but that’s the thing,” you replied, your voice trembling. “it feels like you have. you’re here physically, but emotionally… it’s like you’ve shut me out. i can’t even remember the last time you kissed me or held me without me asking first.”

his jaw tightened at your words, frustration flickering in his eyes. “i’m not good at that stuff, y/n. you know that,” he said, his voice cold. “it doesn’t mean i don’t care about you.”

“i know you’re not good at it,” you said, tears pricking at your eyes. “but i need it, sunghoon. i need to feel loved. i need to feel like you still want me. right now, it just feels like you don’t care.”

sunghoon stood up, running a hand through his hair, his irritation evident. “why do you need constant reassurance?” he snapped, his voice sharper than he intended. “why isn’t it enough that i’m here? isn’t that enough proof that i care?”

you felt your heart sink at his words, the tears you had been holding back finally spilling over. “because just being here isn’t enough!” you cried, standing up to face him.

“i need more than that, sunghoon. i need affection. i need to feel like i matter to you.”

he stood there, his expression cold and hardened, and for a moment, you wondered if he would say anything at all. but then, instead of comforting you, he lashed out.

“maybe you’re being too needy,” he said bluntly.

“i don’t see why i have to constantly prove myself to you.”

you felt like the air had been knocked out of you. his words stung deeply, cutting through you like a knife. without another word, you turned away from him, walking quickly to the bedroom and shutting the door behind you.

you didn’t want him to see you cry—not after what he had just said.

sunghoon stood there in the living room, watching you leave, and the realization of what he had just said hit him like a ton of bricks. his chest tightened with regret.

he knew he wasn’t the most affectionate person, but hearing you say how much it hurt you—that you felt unloved—made him realize how much he had been neglecting your needs.

and worse, he had just pushed you away even further with his harsh words.

after a few minutes of mentally scolding himself over his mistake, sunghoon couldn’t take the silence any longer. he walked to the bedroom and knocked gently on the door, his heart racing.

“y/n,” he called out softly, his voice filled with regret and longing. “can i come in?”

there was a pause, and then your voice came through, quiet and shaky. “come in.”

sunghoon opened the door and stepped inside. you were sitting on the edge of the bed, your face buried in your hands, your shoulders shaking with quiet sobs.

seeing you like that—so hurt, so vulnerable—made his chest ache with guilt. he walked over to you slowly, sitting down beside you.

“y/n,” he said softly, his voice thick with remorse. “i’m so sorry. what i said… it was wrong. you’re not needy. you just want to feel loved, and i haven’t been giving you that. i’ve been cold and distant, and that’s not fair to you.”

you didn’t say anything at first, but you slowly lifted your head to look at him, your eyes red from crying. “i just… i don’t understand why it’s so hard for you to show affection,” you whispered. “i feel like i’m the only one trying, and it’s exhausting.”

sunghoon’s heart broke at your words. he reached out hesitantly, taking your hand in his. “it’s not that i don’t want to show you affection,” he said quietly.

“i’m just not used to it. but that doesn’t mean i don’t care. i love you, y/n. i love you more than anything. i just… i’ve been so caught up in my own head, and i’ve forgotten to show you that.”

you looked into his eyes, searching for sincerity, and you could see how much he truly regretted his words and actions. “i just need to feel like you still want me,” you said softly. “that you still care.”

“i do care,” sunghoon said earnestly, squeezing your hand gently. “i’m going to do better, i promise. i’ll show you that i love you. i don’t want to lose you because of my own issues. you mean too much to me.”

you could hear the sincerity in his voice, and though the pain was still fresh in your mind, his apology filled you with the warmth you were longing for.

slowly, you nodded, giving him a small, accepting smile.

“i just want us to be okay,” you whispered.

sunghoon gently pulled you into his arms, holding you close as he pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head. “we will be,” he murmured. “i’ll make sure of it. i love you so much, y/n.”

“i love you too,” you whispered back, resting your head against his chest. the warmth of his embrace helped to ease the tension, and though the argument still lingered in your mind, you knew the two of you could overcome it.

sunghoon held you close, silently vowing to never let his coldness create distance between you two again. from that moment on, he promised himself he would show you the love you deserved—because you were worth every effort.

© won4kiss 2024

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we can't be friends

hi guys!! this is my very first piece of writing! constructive criticism is always welcomed. please don't mind any grammatical/spelling errors. i wrote this at 2 in the morning and just wanted to do something fun. i still have a lot of room for improvement but i hope you guys enjoy!

warning: little angsty

song: we can't be friends (wait for your love) - ariana grande

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he was the sweetest boy to you when you had first met. his puppy eyes, gorgeous smile, and brown fluffy hair were what drew you in. his flirty words towards you, and only you, had you captivated in a heartbeat. 

that’s why you couldn’t believe what was unfolding in front of you right now.

“oh god please don’t start.” jake groaned as you stared at him with angry eyes. or was it hurt? he couldn’t tell. 

“i’m not starting anything! if anything you are! why are you still talking to your ex after the countless times she’s crossed the boundaries in our relationship? i’ve told you how i feel about her!" your voice croaked and you felt helpless.

you had always tried your best to not be that jealous girlfriend everyone hates. but how could you? jake was attractive and every girl tried to get at him. it didn’t help that he was oblivious to the advances the women around him would give. that’s why you would get angry, but never at him. 

“how many times do i have to tell you that she came up to me? i was just being polite by having a conversation with her”.

jake was sitting on the couch now. his hands covering his face, unaware of the tears forming in your eyes.

it always came down to this. you voicing your problem with jake entertaining other girls and him trying to reassure you.

trying.

you both were growing tired of the constant arguing. 

“jake she was pushing herself all up on you and you just stood there! can you imagine how that made me feel? watching my boyfriend have another girl's hands all over him as if she were the girlfriend?” you were hurt. it hurt. all of this hurt. you knew this wasn’t your boyfriend’s fault. he had always been a gentleman, one of the many qualities you loved about him. but his next words made you second-guess yourself.

“that’s just her character, doll. she’s always been like that from the moment i met her. this jealousy thing of yours really needs to stop, it’s not cute anymore”. jake almost immediately regretted his words as he saw your reaction. he knew he was wrong.

“you think i do this to be cute? am i joke to you?” you cried out.

you don’t remember when everything went wrong. you don’t remember the last time you felt secure in your relationship. maybe you weren’t ready for all of this. 

“no, love i’m sorry i didn’t mean that” jake said as he quickly got up and made his way towards you.

“i’m so sorry, i just had a difficult day that’s all”. he slipped his arm around your waist and used the other to wipe your tears away.

“jake”

he looked at your eyes.

no

“whatever you’re about to say please don’t” jake pleaded.

“jake i just think we aren’t ready for this. for us”. you started to sob again. 

“i think we need to let each other go. we need to grow and learn to understand ourselves before we can understand each other".

“please” jake said as he dipped his head into your neck.

you let him stay there for a while before you detached yourself from him. it was hard to because jake wouldn’t let go. he knew it would be a while before he held you again. 

“i’m sorry jake, i really am” you said with a small smile, trying your best not to completely break down again. 

“no i’m sorry, this is all my fault.”

“we both had fault in this jake, don’t blame yourself.”

you both stood there for a moment, observing each other. it was as if you guys were taking in your last moments together. 

“i’m leaving now jake”. you wasted no time in collecting your things in order to head to the front door. 

“thank you for everything, really. i know things didn’t end how we wanted them to but some of my best memories were with you. thank you jake”. 

jake just stood there, still in disbelief at how quickly things had unraveled. 

right as you were about to walk out he calls to you.

“can we still be friends?” a little hope is visible in his eyes. he hopes that you say yes so that he’s able to see you again.

“we can’t be friends”. and just like that you were gone. the only evidence of you ever being there was jake’s broken heart.

i’ll wait for your love jake thinks as he slowly walks over to the sofa and slumps down.

I can’t be your love

you’re in love with jay

but does he feel the same?

you can’t quite figure that out

warnings/heads up: female character, beginning is a bit slow?? little angsty🎀, fluff, minimal curse words, small kisses here and there…I lowkey suck at building up chemistry/romance so please give tips thank you😞😞😞🙏🙏🙏

wc: idek but hella long that’s for sure

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

There he was.

You always lingered in the halls in hopes of getting even just a glimpse of him. His soft dark brown hair. Eyebrows that somehow looked better than yours. His cheesy little smile that seemed to never falter.

Park Jongseong. Or Jay for short. He was a junior, just like you. But he had this level of maturity that many boys around his age couldn’t reach even if they tried.

He was a gentleman. That’s what you liked about him. He was kind to everyone.

No wonder he had so many admirers.

“You’re going to get caught one day you know?”

You quickly turn around and meet the eyes of your best friend, Liz.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You’re pretty sure your face has turned completely red judging from the way Liz is giggling at you.

“You’re so obvious. I don’t know why you haven’t tried to strike up a conversation with him, you clearly like him.”

Liz has stopped giggling now and peaks behind your shoulder to get a glimpse of your little crush.

“Judging by the way things are looking right now I’d say you need to act fast.”

You quickly turn around to see what she was talking about.

The once lonely Jay now had a girl by his side. They were laughing about something. He was wearing that cheesy smile you loved. There was a burning feeling at the pit of your stomach.

“Oh.”

“Oh? Yeah I think you need a break, let’s go.”

Liz took you by the hand and walked you to your next class.

———————————Time Skip———————————

It was cooking class now. Usually you would be beaming knowing you shared this class with Jay, but the moment you witnessed earlier had given you a twisted feeling.

“Okay class today is the start of a new semester. Which means new cooking partners. I would like you guys to partner up with someone you don’t usually talk to, trust me I know who you guys talk to.”

Maybe I should try to partner up with Jay. It wouldn’t hurt to try right? They might be just friends too, I’m looking much too into it.

You quickly scan the room in hopes of spotting him. You do. But someone had beat you to it. It was that girl again. As you were about to turn and look for another partner the teacher speaks.

“Emma please find another partner. I know the two of you are friends”

The girl, or Emma as you’ve just found out, turns around to face the teacher with a pout.

“But Ms. Smith”

“No buts ma’am”

“Jay tell her something!”

You turn to Jay who now has an…embarrassed expression?

“Emma you’ll be fine. It’s not like the world will end if we’re not partners. We can still talk to each other outside of class.”

Emma huffs and turns to find another partner.

“If you say so. See you after class then.”

You see Jay begin to look around to see if anyone witnessed the humiliating incident. Before you can turn to look away he catches you staring at him.

You immediately turn away and pretend to read the cooking book placed on the table in front of you.

Hopefully he didn’t notice me staring.

You hear footsteps behind you and unconsciously squeeze the book tightly.

“Woah there, are you trying to rip the book into shreds?”

You look up. There he was. You’ve never been this close to him. His eyes are enchanting. You’re speechless.

“Are you okay?”

That snapped you out of your day dream real quick.

“Hi yes sorry.”

He chuckled at you while reaching for the book. Your hands gently brushed his as he took it away from you.

“The names Jay by the way and I’ll be taking this from you now, wouldn’t want you to have to pay anything for damaging school property.”

You laughed awkwardly and turned your entire body to face his.

“So y/n would you like to be partners?”

He knew my name? I don’t recall having any sort of conversation with him ever.

You studied his face a little closer. Were his eyes a little wider now and were his ears a little red? It must be your imagination.

“Oh uh, sure!”

“That’s great. I’ll go get our aprons.”

He walked away to the back of the classroom. You were a nervous wreck to the way the least. You had dreamed of a moment just like this, but you never thought it would happen.

I should take advantage of an opportunity like this.

Jay returned quickly and handed you your apron.

“Do you mind helping me tie it from the back and I’ll help you tie yours?”

Lifting your head up you saw Jay looking at you.

“Yeah, no problem.”

He turned and you caught sight of the freckles along his neck.

Cute.

You finished tying up his apron and turned to face the opposite direction.

“Okay I’m tying it now.”

His hands traced gently along your waist as he reached for both strings. You shivered unwillingly.

“I’m sorry did I do something wrong?”

“No you did nothing wrong it’s just…”

How could you explain to him that everything he did gave you butterflies?

“Never mind you keep on going it’s fine.”

“Okay just please let me know if I’m making you uncomfortable.”

He was such a sweetheart.

Jay quickly finished tying the apron up and you both sat.

“I hope this isn’t too awkward for you.” Jay says while his head rests on his hand that’s propped up against the table.

“Why would it be awkward?”

Your words came out a little harsher than you meant.

“Well I saw that you witnessed that little incident earlier. I don’t want you thinking that you were a second option or anything.”

“But I was, wasn’t I? You only paired up with me because Emma couldn’t.”

“Wow you’re very straightforward aren’t you? And about Emma, she wanted to be partners with me not the other way around.”

Jay has this concerned look on his face. As if he wants you to understand him. To understand what he was saying.

“Well that doesn’t really matter to me so you’re good.”

“Uh that’s great then.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah…”

You have no idea why you acted the way you did just now but you regretted it. It was easy to tell that Jay was a bit hurt by your words. You were about to say something, but Jay beats you to it.

“Let’s make some apple pie then? The teacher said we could choose whatever pie we wanted to make.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

It was towards the end of class now and there was flour, sugar, apples, and so much more everywhere on the table. Not only the table, but your face too.

Jay and you had gotten past the tension from earlier and were now laughing and playing around.

“Oh you got something right…”

Jay reaches just under your lip and wipes some of the flour off.

“here.”

You blush and start cleaning up your area hoping that he didn’t notice. How was it so easy for him to do something like that?

As you both finished up cleaning the space around you a voice comes up behind you.

“Jay are you ready to go?”

It was Emma. You had to admit she was gorgeous. It was likely her and Jay were together, hopefully not.

“Oh uh…I’ll meet you guys later I need to talk to my cooking partner about something first.”

Emma took a quick glance at you and then back at Jay.

“Yeah sure…see you.”

She walked away and you looked at Jay with a questioning face wondering what he could possibly want to talk about. But first you had to ask the question that was nagging you.

“Girlfriend?”

“What?”

“I mean Emma.”

You internally slapped yourself. It was such a stupid question, of course they were dating.

“Emma? No never! I mean she’s pretty cool and all but we’re just close friends that’s all .”

“But she’s really pretty, you guys suit each other.”

“You’re right she is pretty.”

You should’ve kept your mouth shut.

“But-”

You cut him off before he can continue, not wanting to hear anything more about Emma and what he thinks of her.

“So what is that you wanted to talk about?”

“Oh yeah that. I heard you’re pretty good at English and I could really use your help. I was wondering if you could tutor me?”

So that’s how he knew your name. Was his plan to befriend you so that you wouldn’t say no to tutoring him? You won’t lie it hurt a little bit. But how could you say no to the man you were so hopelessly and devastatingly in love with?

“Um…sure no worries. What time works for you? I’m free every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday after school.”

“You’re an angel sent from heaven thank you so much!”

Your heart just skipped a beat.

“Those times work for me. See you next week then?”

“Yeah see you next week.”

Jay winks at you and walks out.

Oh gosh this was a mistake.

———————————Time Skip———————————

“HELLO? Oh my gosh this is so crazy y/n what!”

Of course you had told Liz everything.

“I know but I’m still super worried Liz.”

Instead of what should have been a smile plastered on your face, was a frown.

“I just can’t help but feel that he wanted to get close to me just so he could easily get me as a tutor. And what’s worse? It worked.”

“Based on what you told me I’m pretty sure he really wants to be friends. You got to watch out for that Emma girl though.”

“I know but I don’t think we would grow into anything beyond that. Plus he said she was pretty.”

“And you’re breathtaking so what does that matter. Impress him! Captivate him. Lock him up if you have to.”

You start laughing at your friend. Liz always knew how to make you feel better.

“We’ll see.”

———————————Time Skip———————————

Knowing that today was the first day of tutoring with Jay, you decided to dress up nicely. A cute pink bow, jean skirt, and a white cashmere sweater. Simple.

Jay was already sitting in the study room you had reserved when you walked in.

His eyes flickered up and he took your appearance in.

“Never saw you as the type to wear skirts.”

How would he know what I wear? I thought he only knew of me just a couple days ago.

“I never knew you were the type to know what I wear on a daily basis.”

You were joking of course, trying to act casually around Jay in order to get closer to him.

But he seemed flustered.

“Well um…glad you could make it. Thanks again for doing this for me I really appreciate it.”

“Yeah no problem it’s not too much of a hassle for me, this is perfect for my extracurriculars list anyways.”

Jay quickly sits up right.

“Oh yeah I heard you have big plans for college. I’m really smart too you know? It’s just English is my only weakness. And also-”

You laugh at him as he tries to quickly string his words together. You already knew how smart he was, of course you did.

“Jay you don’t need to tell me any of this you know that right? I’m not judging you or anything. Unless you see me as some sort of competition or something?”

Jay smiles.

“No yeah I guess I just had the urge to I don’t know…impress you?”

“Why would you need to impress me?”

“I don’t know.”

You both stare at each other.

“Well you’ve left a pretty good impression on me so far, so don’t worry too much okay?”

Wow you’ve gotten bold out of no where.

He chuckles.

“I’m happy to hear that.”

“Okay then let’s get started.”

You turn to the books you placed on the table and open one up.

“So let’s start with the basics. What have you been struggling on?”

Jay leans his body closer to you making you once again, shiver. His effect on you drove you crazy.

“Sorry am I too close?”

There was no way you’d give him even a hint of your liking towards him.

“No you’re fine. I guess it was a bad day to wear a skirt, it’s a bit chilly in here.”

You tried to laugh the situation off.

“Here take this.”

Your heart skipped a couple beats as he draped his jacket over your legs. You could feel your cheeks flushing red.

“Oh uh thank you!”

“No problem.”

His smile oh lorddddddd.

“Well let’s continue.”

End of tutoring session

“Thanks so much y/n I feel like I’m improving already.”

“Don’t flatter me too much.”

The both of you laugh.

You reach for his jacket but he stops you and instead grabs the jacket to place it over your shoulders.

“You should take it, it’s pretty windy out there and I heard it’s supposed to rain soon.”

This man. He was going to be the death of you.

“But then you won’t have anything to wear! I’ll be fine don’t worry it’s not that far of a walk to the bus stop anyway.”

He starts to collect his things.

“I live nearby so I’ll be okay. But you should hurry to the bus stop before it starts pouring. Wouldn’t want you to get sick.”

He’s so caring it hurts. Was he like this towards others? Other girls? Emma?

“Okay see you tomorrow for cooking class then?”

“See you.”

———————————Time Skip———————————

You walk into school, earlier than usual. In your hand was Jay’s jacket, you were eager to find him and give it to him. Or maybe eager just to talk to him. This new formed friendship was now something you cherished deeply.

As you walked through the hallways and turned on a sharp corner you accidentally bump into someone. Their phone goes flying in the air.

Emma.

Just your luck.

“I’m so sorry I didn’t see you there!”

You’re first to apologize, it was the polite thing to do since it was your fault.

“No worries, I should’ve watched where I was going too but I was busy looking at my phone.”

The phone was still laying on the floor, screen side up, so you reached down for it.

It wasn’t your intention to snoop but the name on the screen caught your attention.

She was texting Jay.

You only got to read the name before quickly handing it back to her.

There was a moment of awkward silence as you both just stood there.

Emma took notice of the jacket you had in your arms.

“Is that Jay’s jacket?”

Trying to maintain eye contact with her, you speak.

“Yeah, he let me borrow it yesterday and I was hoping to return it.”

“How sweet! He’s always lending out his sweaters, it’s a habit of his. Whenever I leave my sweaters at home he always gives his up.”

Oh.

It was pretty stupid to think you were any more special than Emma, he knew her longer and she knew him longer too. They had a stronger bond than the two day old one you both had.

Emma took your silence as a sign to speak again.

“I can give it back to him if you’d like? I have first period with him.”

You look up at her and she has this beautiful smile. She’s similar to Jay in many ways. They’d look lovely together.

“Would you do that for me? Thanks.”

Your voice trembled a bit as you handed the jacket over to her.

Don’t cry. This isn’t something to cry over. You’re not even close with him.

“Well see you around…what was your name?”

“Y/n.”

“My names Emma! See you around y/n!”

At the moment it didn’t irk you that Jay could possibly have feelings for Emma. What irked you is that you couldn’t hate nor dislike her. She was kind and genuine towards you. There were no ill intentions behind her words.

Sighing, you turned around to head towards your locker.

“Good morning darling how was tutoring yesterday?”

At least there was Liz. She was always there for you.

“It was okay.”

“Oh wow. Okay. What’s got you in a twist? I thought you would be bursting with happiness after having some alone time with your crush.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Hmm I know you’re lying but I won’t pry anything out of you now. Tell me when you’re ready.”

“This is why I love you.”

“I know it is. Now come one let’s go, I heard they’re serving waffles in the cafeteria today!”

———————————Time Skip———————————

It was now cooking class. For this first time ever, you were dreading having to face Jay. There was this small ball of anger in you, jealousy. You didn’t know how to handle it.

Maybe I should tell the teacher I don’t feel well.

Before you could act on your thoughts, a familiar voice reaches your ears.

“Hey y/n! How you been?”

Jay starts to settle his things down next to you.

Why is it so difficult to try and have a conversation with him right now?

Probably because you know he just walked in with Emma.

This jealousy thing was really frustrating you.

“We saw each other not even less than 24 hours ago. You’re making it seem like it’s been over a year.”

He shifts his head to look at you.

“Yeah uh just trying to make conversation. You know?”

“Mhm.”

You hoped your attitude didn’t hurt him too much. But you felt hurt too.

“I saw that you gave Emma my jacket.”

“Yeah.”

“Didn’t want to see me huh? Is that why you gave it to her?”

He chuckled. He was joking, but you weren’t in the mood for it.

“No.”

Silence.

“Sorry I’m not feeling well today. I think I might go to the nurses office.”

Before he could get a word out you walk up to the front of the class and explain to the teacher about your “illness”. After being given your teachers approval you make your way to the nurses office.

Mindlessly forgetting your things, just needing an escape.

End of class.

Class is now over and you’re still laying down on one of the beds with the curtains closed.

You slept for the first thirty minutes of your stay but now you can’t stop thinking about Jay.

How there was a hint of sadness in his eyes as you walked away from him. Or was it worry? Hard to tell. You clearly don’t know him at all.

But no matter how hard you tried to stop thinking of him, he always wandered back into your mind.

“Jay…”

A sudden noise erupts from behind the curtains.

“Awe man!”

You stand up quickly.

“Hello?”

You slide the curtain open and to your surprise Jay is on the floor with…strawberry milk?

“Thought I could surprise you but I guess you knew I was here already. How did you know? I thought I was being sneaky…”

That’s good. He doesn’t know you were being a complete lunatic who can’t seem to stop thinking of him.

“Oh trust me, you surprised me alright.”

You can’t help but laugh at the sight in front of you.

Jay looks like an absolute clutz.

“That’s nice.”

You stop laughing and raise an eyebrow.

“What is?”

“Seeing you happy.”

You blush.

“Sorry about earlier. I was being a bitch.”

“No you weren’t. Don’t call yourself that.”

He always knew what words would give you butterflies.

“Well I was being a bit rude.”

Your hand reaches out for his, he takes it.

“We all have our bad days.”

He’s up now. But neither of you let go. You don’t want to let go. Does he? He might think you’re weird if you don’t let go of his hand soon.

Swiftly, you retract your hand from his bringing it to your side.

His face now has a tint of pink realizing what just happened.

“I bought you this.”

He sticks out his hand which has the strawberry milk you saw earlier.

“Thanks I love strawberry milk!”

“Yeah Emma told me all girls love anything strawberry.”

Oh.

You try to conceal the jealousy you had forgotten you felt to begin with.

“Emma’s a genius.”

“She is.”

You look down to open up the milk in order to hide the hurt on your face.

“But you are too.”

Huh?

“Thank you?”

Jay stares at you as you struggle to open the carton of milk. He grabs it from you and continues to open it as he speaks.

“I have something important to tell you and I understand if you get weirded out and don’t want to be friends anymore. But it’s just something I need to get off my chest.”

What could it be?

“Go ahead.”

He takes a deep breath and hands the milk back to you. His hand now starts to scratch the back of his neck.

“So I know we’ve only know each other for a couple days but I was hoping to get to know you better.”

“Know me better?”

Was this a dream?

“Yeah, in a romantic way I guess? I don’t know. I don’t really know how to explain it. But I understand if your answer is no. It’s just that I kind of like you and-”

His words are cut short when you hug him.

“I hope this is okay.”

You say, hoping for some reassurance.

“I’m just so happy right now.”

“This is more than okay. It’s great. It’s amazing.”

Jay’s hugging you back now.

The both of you stay like that for a while. Until the nurse finds the two of you and sends you guys to the principle’s office for skipping class in order to date.

Being sent to the principle’s office should have made you upset. But as you walked side by side with Jay, nothing could make you happier.

4 months later

You guessed it. Jay and you had ended up together. Turns out your suspicions of him and Emma were wrong, and they were really just close friends. Also, let’s just say she seemed to take interest into Liz a lot more than she did Jay.

Throughout your so far two month relationship you discovered two important things.

1. Jay absolutely loved smothering you in kisses and hugging you from behind while slithering his hands across your waist. He loved pinching your stomach and hearing your voice telling him to stop.

2. You were a clingy girlfriend. Not in a bad way. You didn’t have to be with him every minute of the day. But you took advantage of any moment you had with him, immediately hugging him the moment your eyes set on him. Goodbyes were always hard, even if you were seeing him the next morning.

Jay didn’t mind though. This was one of the many things he loved about you.

“Graduation is coming up soon.”

Jay and you are at the park right now eating ice cream. Summer is coming up soon so the weather is starting to warm up.

“I know, time flies.”

You respond to him. Happily licking away at your ice cream and enjoying the view of the pond in front of you as the sun sets.

“I can’t believe we’re going to be seniors soon.”

Jay still can’t grasp the idea of this being his last high school year.

“College is soon.”

“I never did ask what you wanted to do after high school.”

“I never asked you either.”

“So?”

“So?”

“Y/n…”

You laugh at him and reach for his hand.

“I hope to be a doctor.”

“That’s awesome. You can do it.”

“You really think so?”

“I know so.”

He squeezes your hand in order to offer some sort of comfort. It works.

“How about you? What do you want to do Jay?”

“I’m boring and simple. I’d like to be a mechanical engineer just like my dad.”

“You’re anything but boring and simple Jay.”

He smiles and leans in to kiss you.

His lips are soft and gentle. You guys have kissed hundreds of times but he always makes it seem like it’s your first.

As he pulls away he brushes some of your hair away from your face. His next words leave you in absolute shock.

“I think I love you.”

Your eyes are wide and your mouth is left agape.

“No, I know that I love you. I understand if it’s too soon and there is no need to give me a response anywhere near the future, but I thought I should let you know.”

“Why?”

“What?”

“Why do you love me?”

Your questions were cliche. You knew that. But you needed to know why. This all felt so surreal. Too good to be true.

“Because you’re you. Because of the way you laugh at my unfunny jokes no matter what. Because of the way you smile even at the smallest things. Because of the way you don’t let anyone disrespect you no matter what. And most of all, because of the way you’re the only one that can make my heart skip a beat, make my ears red, and give me butterflies. My heart beats for you and only for you.”

Woah.

You never knew someone could ever feel like this towards you. You were absolutely star struck. But you had an answer already. You always had it deep within you.

“I love you too Jay.”

He smiled.

“Thank God. I was hoping you would say that.”

With that, you both shared another kiss. This one was longer, deeper, and more passionate. It was as if time had stopped. As if the world had stopped. It was just the two of you.

You wished this moment would last forever.

———————————Time Skip———————————

It’s the beginning of senior year now. Jay and you had a plan. Apply to the same colleges which had both of your majors. Go to school together. Graduate, get married, all of that. Two dumb love birds hopelessly devoted to each other.

You both had similar grades and qualifications so you weren’t too worried about getting in or not getting into the same colleges.

It didn’t matter to you though, you would follow Jay wherever he went. You would strive in any pre med program anyways. It wasn’t a bother, as long as you were with Jay. The love of your life.

“I can’t believe it’s our senior year Jay! This is so exciting!”

“I know love, but let’s start getting ready for those applications okay? You know how quickly time passes by.”

“Ofcourse I do. Want to come over after school? We can come with ideas together for or piqs.”

“That sounds great. See you after class?”

“See you!”

7 months later

It was now time. Colleges were sending out their letters.

You had to admit. This was nerve wrecking. It would be absolutely devastating if you didn’t get in to any of your dream schools. Of course John Hopkins and Stanford being at the top.

But the fear of not going to school with Jay had also crossed your mind a couple of times. It’s not like you would die if you didn’t go to the same school, but you loved growing as a person with him and watching him grow too.

The both of you received acceptance letters from various schools but all of them weren’t any of you two’s top choices. Jay’s top choices were MIT and Stanford. Stanford seemed to be the target at the moment. You had applied to Amherst too, just in case Jay had to go to MIT instead of Stanford. It wasn’t your top choice but it wasn’t a bad one either. Luckily you had gotten in!

“Y/n sweetie your father says the mail man delivered some letters! It two of them seem to be from Stanford and John Hopkins!”

Your mom yells from downstairs.

This is really happening.

You quickly rush down stairs and see the letters there in the middle of the table.

“Deep breaths sweet girl. Just know we’re here supporting you no matter what those letters say. You’re still an amazing and intelligent lady.”

Your dad says as he rubs your shoulders.

You smile nervously and reach for the John Hopkins letter first.

Waitlisted.

“It’s okay honey, that’s still such a great accomplishment.”

Tears are threatening to spill out of your eyes. But you have to look strong. You still have one more letter to look at. The one that matters most to you right now.

You reach out to open it and once you start to read what’s inside of it you can’t help the tears from coming out.

Congratulations y/n we are happy to admit you to the Class of 2028!

“Mom! Dad! I’m in! I’m actually in!”

Your parents hug you and take you out to eat in order to celebrate.

Hours later.

As you head to your room after dinner you text Jay.

You: Jay can we call really quick?

Jay: Well hello to you too princess.

You: Haha very funny. Now please can we call?

Jay: Anything for my girl😋

“Hello?”

“Hi princess.”

“How much longer until you stop calling me that?”

“Never.”

“Okay whatever.”

“You got in didn’t you?”

“What? How did you know? Did my parents tell you? I wanted to surprise you!”

“I know you too well, that’s how I knew. Congratulations y/n. You have absolutely no idea how incredibly proud of you I am.”

“Thanks Jay! How about you? Did you get your letter yet? You got in didn’t you?”

Jay clears his throat and for a moment you start to get worried.

“Jay…?”

“Of course I got in princess.”

“Oh my gosh this is amazing. I can’t believe I’m going to college with my boyfriend!”

“Okay y/n it’s been a long day so you should probably head to sleep now sleeping beauty.”

“You can be an annoying shithead sometimes you know that right?”

“I’m your annoying shithead.”

You laugh.

“You’re right. Love you lots Jay. Goodnight.”

“Love you more princess. Goodnight.”

———————————Time Skip———————————

“Hi Liz how’s Boston?”

Yup! Liz got into Boston University! It’s towards the end of summer now and she’s meeting some of her dormates before she officially moves in at the start of the semester.

“It’s great over here! I’m living for this weather. I wish you were here with me right now, I need my best friend during times like these.”

“You’ll be fine, you can make friends anywhere you go.”

“But it won’t be the same without you.”

“I could say the same thing.”

“So…how are things with you and Jay?”

“Everything is going great. But I have noticed something different about him.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“Well he’s been acting a lot more clingy lately. Way more than I usually am. And I thought I was supposed to be the clingy girl friend!”

“Hm yeah, I wouldn’t look too much into it he’s probably thinking guys will try to snatch you up in college.”

“Never!”

You both start to laugh and quickly say your goodbyes as Liz had to go out for lunch with her new found friends.

Coincidentally it’s student orientation day for you so you call up Jay.

It rings.

And rings.

And rings.

Strange.

Jay’s house is only a ten minute bus ride so you decide to go check up on him.

You arrive at his house and knock on his door.

His mom steps out. She usually has a gleeful smile just like Jay’s, but this time her smile is no where to be seen.

“Hi ma’am how have you been? Is Jay around? I tried to call him but he wouldn’t answer so I just came to check up on him!”

Mrs. Park stares at you with saddened eyes and then hugs you.

“I’m so sorry my sweet girl. I’m so so sorry. Just know he did it for a reason okay? He did it for your own good.”

You’re shocked by this. What does she mean? For your own good?

“Excuse Mrs. Park but I’m a little confused. What do you mean? Where’s Jay?”

Mrs. Park rushes inside and quickly comes back out. This time with a letter.

“Take this and read it at home okay? It’s best if you do it in your room alone.”

And with that she gives you one last hug before shutting the door.

What.

The.

Fuck.

Was that.

You’re going through so many emotions right now. As you take the bus home you have the letter in one hand and your phone in the other. You continue to attempt to call Jay in order to get some sort of answer from him.

You make it home and enter your room. Sitting down on your bed you wast no time in opening the letter. Your eyes settle on the first line.

Dear y/n,

Hi princess I know you must be worried right now. Just know that I am physically okay. At first, I wanted to do this in person but I just couldn’t find the strength to do it. I know I’m a coward. I know this will hurt you just as much as it hurts me. But I’m doing this for you. Because I love you. In no way am I blaming you for anything. I want apologize for what I’m about to say next.

I won’t be going to college with you. We can’t spend the next four years together. I’m so incredibly proud of all your accomplishments. I know it’s been one of your biggest dreams to attend Stanford. Which is why I couldn’t let you come to Massachusetts with me. I know the plan was to be together, but your dreams should always come before me. I don’t want to stop you from reaching your full potential. Long distance relationships are a thing yes. But I feel that with our relationship we will only hold each other back. We will never want to reach out for more, in fear of leaving the other behind. I hope that one day you will find it in your heart to forgive me. I hope that we can find our way back to each other. I will always love you. Every season with you has been a blessing. For now I’ll pray for you all the time.

For now I can’t be your love.

I love you,

Jay

You start to uncontrollably sob.

“Jay you asshole. How would you know anything about my dreams?”

Your throat was itching.

“You were my dream. My dream was to spend my life with you.”

You cried yourself to sleep that night.

Heartbroken.

•••••••••••••••••••JAY’S POV••••••••••••••••••••

I loved her since the day I saw her at the library.

It was sophomore year.

Finals week.

I was looking for some books to prepare for the English final and there she was.

Studying? No.

She was tutoring someone else.

I was amazed. She had to be the smartest at this school. Finals week and here she was helping someone else out.

She was beautiful too. Her dimples and cheeky smile captured me in an instant.

I made it my mission to look for her every time I was at the library.

Luckily she was always there.

I never got too close. Afraid that I would scare her away.

Emma always said I was paranoid and that I should go for it before someone else did.

I never had the courage to, until my junior year.

She was looking at me. Actually looking at me.

She turned away immediately after I caught her but I knew this was my chance to get to know her.

As I walked up to her desk in cooking class I took notice of her hands clutching onto the book in front of her.

Cute.

From there we got closer.

I could never get tired of her.

My hands always found their way to her waist or her face. I loved caressing her and covering her with kisses. It was just my way of showing my love for her.

I loved this girl.

I loved her so much that I was willing to let her go even if it hurt me so very much.

When I got that rejection letter from Stanford I was heartbroken. Not only because it was my dream school but because it was our dream school.

I knew if I told her that I was rejected she would want to go to Amherst. But I couldn’t let that happen. I couldn’t stop her from chasing the thing she had wanted for so long.

So I wrote her a letter. It was the only way I could clearly express myself.

Even though I made the heartbreaking decision of leaving without saying a proper goodbye I don’t regret it.

I don’t think I could ever leave her if I had to face her one last time.

I thought leaving without a goodbye would be the hardest part but the messages and calls she would leave me for the next few weeks absolutely broke me. I had to fight so hard to not respond.

I’m sorry princess.

I can’t be your love because I’m afraid I’ll ruin your life.

5 years later.

I’m home again. I haven’t told anyone. Not even my parents. I want to take everything in.

Not much has changed. Hasn’t been that long since I left anyways.

But I guess I have.

I’ve grown a bit taller, new hair, and looked a lot cleaner than I did back then.

I walk down the streets of San Francisco and pass by a coffee shop.

It’s a coffee shop she and I regularly had dates at.

I walk in. The bell chimes as it opens up and a couple heads turn to see who the newcomer is, and then they all quickly turn back to what ever they were doing before.

I walk up to the cashier ready to order when I hear a familiar name.

“Order for y/n!”

I turn to the voice.

There she is.

It feels like I’m at the library again.

She’s become even more breathtaking.

Is that even possible?

There’s so much going through my head but it’s as if my legs have a mind of their own because before I know it I’m in front of her.

Admiring her face.

I’m the first to speak.

“Hi.”

Her breath hitches before she starts to talk to me.

“Jay…hi.”

I can’t believe this. I mean, I should’ve expected it. She never did leave the area.

“How have you been, time has-”

Before I can finish a voice calls out to her.

“Y/n there you are!”

A man runs up to her and slides his hand into hers while giving her a soft peck on the forehead.

Oh.

Are We Still Friends?

(preview)

synopsis: Heeseung and you were close friends. Closer than most. Slowly you both realize that maybe being friends has become too difficult. Heeseung struggles to understand his feelings, and you're not sure how long you can wait.

warning/heads up: fluff, angst, flirting, protective+jealous Heeseung, jealousy, and more to come up as I continue writing...

wc: 552 in the preview + tbd for final draft

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Heeseung and you were on your way home after a day out on the beach with some friends.

It was a quiet ride for the most part. 

“ARE WE STILL FRIENDS?” by Tyler, The Creator currently playing

“Have fun?”

Heeseung asked, shifting his eyes off the road for a second to glance over at you.

“Lots. We should do this again sometime.”

Heeseung and you had become friends in your freshman year of high school. Your twin brother was the one to introduce the both of you. The two of you had first bonded over your love for music and since then you guys have become inseparable. It’s now your senior year.

“Definitely. Did you see Lola checking me out? She for sure wants me.”

You let out a laugh.

“Yeah, she was totally not laughing at your horrible volleyball skills.”

You say with a hint of sarcasm.

Heeseung pinches your thigh.

“Watch it. I’ll tell your brother you’re being mean to me.”

You flinch and instinctively slap his hand away. 

“I’ll tell him that you keep on harassing me.”

Heeseung clutches his heart.

“Oh no. I’m so scared.”

This time you both burst out laughing.

“Okay, I think I’m going to take a nap. We still have a pretty long way to get home and I’m burnt out.”

You start to recline your seat and shift to face the window.

“I’m going to think you don’t like me y/n if you turn away from me like that.”

Rolling your eyes you change your position to look at him.

“I know you think I’m pretty and all but your obsession with being able to see my face at all times is concerning.”

Did I mention Heeseung and you liked to playfully flirt?

“This is why I can’t get a girlfriend, you’re over here acting like mine.”

You reach for his hand that’s resting on the stick.

“But Heeseung I thought I was your girlfriend?”

You say looking at him with your best puppy eyes.

“Please stop I’m going to start believing you’re in love with me or something.” 

He says swatting your hand away and giving you a playful smile.

Instead of leaving him alone, you decided to tease him a bit more–just like all best friends do, right?

You stretch out your hand and slowly start tracing your finger along his arm.

“How did you know? Oh, Heeseung I am so totally in love with you.”

As you continue tracing your finger along his arm, you feel him tense up at what you just said to him.

“Oh my, you must be so happy to hear me confess my love to you! Aren’t you? It’s okay Heeseung many boys li-”

Before you have the opportunity to keep rambling he grabs your hand and places it on the stick, he then puts his hand on top of yours.

You’re in shock and look up at his face.

He’s still smiling.

“Had to make you stop one way or another. Go to sleep miss, and stop flirting with me just to get my attention.”

And with that, you don’t speak anymore. Not because you don’t want to, but you just don’t know what to say. Your eyes slowly close and Heeseung is the last thing you see before you drift off to sleep. 

Breaking the Ice

synopsis: you were a talented figure skater, who found herself torn between loyalty and love when falling for park sunghoon, the captain of your brother jake's rivaling hockey team. as your secret romance deepens and opportunities for you arise, balancing feelings and family loyalty seems to be a struggle.

warnings: sunghoonxfem!reader+more as I continue to write

a/n: lol this might be a little corny bc there are so many stories of sunghoon related to ice skating and other things but i thought this would be fun!! also lmk if i should make taglist for this bc i never have before??

teaser:

as you sat down in one of the stadium's very first rows, you fixed the jersey that was currently bunched up at the bottom. your brother had insisted on having you wear it to fend off any of his teammates from trying to flirt with you.

letting out a sigh you quickly scanned over the rink in search of your brother. he was easy to find, currently, he was having a pep talk with his team before the game began.

buzz

both teams began to move to their positions. naturally, jake took the center position, being the best player on his team. he hadn't dedicated most of his life to this sport to be anything less than the center of attention.

but at the moment he wasn't the one to capture your eye. a fair-skinned boy was just the opposite of jake. presumably the center for the opposing team. he was one of the most breathtaking men you've ever seen. even through the helmet on his head, his beauty radiated.

you hadn't noticed you were staring at him for an uncomfortable amount of time until the sounds of men grunting and skates gliding across the ice hit your ears.

but it wasn't too long before the unknown boy had your attention again because before you knew it his body was slammed against the glass right in front of you.

he recovered rather fast and went on to fix his now crooked helmet. but just as he was facing the crowd he stopped.

locking eyes with you he swiftly scanned over the features of your face. smirking at you, he gave you a wink. ears getting red you couldn't help but let out a giggle.

the man conntinued to eye you but his eyes halted when reading the name on your jersey. with a scowl on his face he picked up the stick that he had dropped on the ground and turned around to join his teamates who saw the whole interaction play out.

what the fuck was that?

tearing your eyes away from the boy you turned to face jake's team. and there he was, wearing a face similar to the boy who had one of the most contradicting reactions in 20 seconds.

CUPID’S MISTAKE ! sim jaeyun

♫ crybaby by the neighbourhood

SYNOPSIS. you’ve never understood why he gets so many dates all the time, he’s bloody insufferable. you can’t stand him at all, yet everyone else is crazy for him. i guess, you’ll find out what’s so irresistible about himself, soon. after all, he’s planning your valentines date together already.

PAIRING. playboy!enha x reader, slight enemies to lovers au, angst & fluff.

WARNINGS. cursing, suggestive ish make outs but they’re not that bad & jake being MEANNN.

WORD COUNT. almost 9k (8,976)

N. hi guys it’s finally out! member reveal omg !! feel like this fic could have been way better but i promise to make the next not as rushed and rubbish :( lmk what u guys think thoughhh .. also big thank you to @dazed-hee for beta reading :)

TAGLIST. @delcakoo2 @flwrshee @woon2u @rikizm @luckyowl @luvistqrzzz @mrchweeee @seungiesluv @x-mbl

 1. I THINK I TRY TOO HARD. 

You always hated the first days of school, but for some reason, they had always summed up your year perfectly. Something about them was always so exciting.

Every first day of school for four years now, you started your day with a Starbucks accompanied by your best friends: Yunjin and Taehyun. The sweet taste of the coffee greeting your tastebuds first thing in the morning paired with your - somewhat - lovely best friends. They spent the entire morning bickering, but still, it was a pleasant start to the morning. 

Entering the school gates, you heard Yunjin beside you say, “Guys, get a good look. This is the last first day of high school we’re going to have.” 

Taehyun rolls his eyes, “Literally makes no difference at all. We’ll see this shithole for another year.” 

“Do you always have to contradict what I say?” She huffs to which Taehyun happily nods and you laugh at the entire situation.

“What lesson do you all start with?” You ask. “I have Chemistry with Mr Kim.”

“Same,” your friends say in unison, so you make your way to Chemistry, listening intently to the bickering that continues.

Straight away, your teacher puts you in a seating plan, despite the many complaints against it. You get placed at the back corner, the seat beside you remaining empty for now while Yunjin sits a few rows ahead of you to your left and Taehyun sits one seat ahead of you.

Quickly, the class begins to get full but your eyes linger on a certain nuisance strutting into the classroom. 

Mr Kim informs him of his seat, which he begins striding to in his tampered version of the school’s uniform that everyone seems to think looks “cool”. Only until he stands right beside you do you realise that his seat is the one right next to you. 

“Hi partner,” Jake smiles at you, before taking a seat.

“There has to be some kind of mistake,” You say, raising your hand to protest against this act of horror. 

Jake brings his own hand up to pull yours down, “You know how Mr Kim is, he’ll assign you a detention if you make a fuss. He’s short tempered, I learnt that the hard way so trust me.” 

You pull your arm away from Jake’s hold, “He’s short tempered with students like you, not honour students like me.”

“Okay, snobby much. You’ll have to lose that characteristic of yourself if you wanna be friends. Or more?” He winks at you, causing your face to deform in disgust. 

Jake laughs at the way you cross your arms, “Relax, Jaeyun. I have no interest in you.”

“We’ll see.”

The rest of the lesson is spent working with Jake rather than working against him, since he’s good at Chemistry, which isn’t a surprise as you were aware that science was his strong suit. 

The only issue is the amount of jokes he’s made about you and him having Chemistry; they just get worse every single time, too. 

“See you on Wednesday, Y/n,” Jake smiles at you. Seeing the way his lips curl into a sweet smile forces you to smile back at him even if it’s against your will, but you catch yourself rather quickly and scoff at him before leaving with your friends.

Yunjin and Taehyun drag you to your usual bench in the school, forcing you to take a seat as they also take a seat to sit in front of you and immediately begin questioning you.

Yunjin is the first to start, “Wow, Y/n. After years of judging me for finding Jake attractive, here you are flirting with him the whole lesson.”

“I was not!” You exclaim in disbelief.

Taehyun slings an arm around your shoulder, “Y/n, I sit in front of you. I heard all of the jokes he made.”

“Yeah, then you also heard the way I told him to be quiet after every single one of his corny ass jokes. He’s a little shit.”

“A little shit who has you wrapped around his finger already,” Yunjin and Taehyun high five.

“I never thought Jake would be the reason why you two are agreeing for once,” You say. “In all honesty, looks and science are his only strong points which is why he uses them for his personal gain. The amount of hearts he’s probably broken in the space of two weeks is probably more than people I’ve ever spoken to in my entire life.”

Contradicting their previous statements, your two best friends nod at this and cease their teasing because it was true, Jake was too much of a flirt. He’s always had that reputation about him; the one where his choice of words can make anyone swoon for a while, until he’s bored of them. Especially if he uses that smile of his, he could get away with anything.

But not with you. You weren’t like that. Not the type to be swayed by his antics.

Perhaps, it was because school had always been your main priority so you never really had time to be distracted by guys like Jake and now that it was your senior year, there definitely wasn't enough time to get distracted by Jake. He just wasn’t worth it.

Or so you thought.

You found now that Jake would always be sitting in his seat before you in Chemistry, greeting you with that smile of his every single time, and even going as far as pulling out your chair for you just like a gentleman would.

“Save it, Jaeyun. We all know that being a gentleman isn't your thing.”

“Of course it is. How do you think I get all the women to fall for me?” He has a response for everything.

“Well, that definitely won't happen this time, Jaeyun,” you remark, smiling teasingly at him.

He pauses for a moment which causes you to look at him - he wasn't the type to pause after something like that.

Jake has a smirk plastered on his lips, “No one else calls me Jaeyun. Why do you call me that?”

With a sigh, you respond, “Because, I know all your playthings call you that, so it would seem inappropriate to call you the name that they do, as I definitely am not one of your playthings.”

He simply just laughs and calls you a nerd under his breath.

“Have you heard about the cupid thing that’s going to happen?” He asks you.

It was called the Cupid Fantasy Draft and it was all Yunjin could talk about for the last three days. The Cupid Fantasy Draft was an odd occasion that your classmates were organising in which there would be students paired together and they would go on dates and stuff for the entire year. You thought it was a silly idea as it was basically forcing people to date, but Yunjin argued that it was a good idea since people could get to know others easier. You didn't argue with it that much since you knew you wouldn't get picked.

“Yes, I have. Stupid idea.”

Jake groans, “Do you have to be so boring all the time? Have some fun once in a while. You never know, you might get picked.”

This causes you to pry yourself away from your books to look at Jake with a stare that seems to catch him off guard. 

“Even if someone is dumb enough to pick me, they can’t force me to go to it.”

Once again, he responds to you with, “We’ll see. Did you know that this cupid date is also your valentine? So you don't have to worry about being lonely on Valentine's day like you always have been!”

“Ha ha,” You mock. “Are you even doing this thing?”

“Of course.”

You laugh, “This doesn’t seem like your type of thing. Isn’t this too restricting for you?”

A deep frown washes his face, “What do you mean by that?”

“Aren’t you used to dating two people a day? Why the sudden change of heart?”

Jake shrugs, “Maybe, I’ve met someone.”

To this, you feel a small hit to your chest at the thought of Jake with someone else but you easily brush it off, “Yeah, right.”

What the hell was that? 

At lunch, your friends are conversing about the Cupid Fantasy Draft happening later that evening - just like they have been for days now - while your nose is buried into a romance book to make up for the ever so slight damage to your heart in Chemistry. The aim of the romance novel was to remind you that Jake Sim was not worth being hurt over, and instead the fictional character showering his beloved in endless amounts of affection was causing you to swoon. 

You’re pulled away from your fictional fantasy by a voice calling you, “Y/n! I’ve been looking everywhere for you.”

Jake stands behind you, with Sunghoon and Jay to his side, sending you friendly smiles.

“What do you want, Jaeyun?” 

He holds out a familiar pen. It was one of your favourite pens, designed with a bear and had a sweet scented smell to add to the speciality of the pen.

“How did you get this?” you attempt to snatch it away, but Jake is quick to snatch it back. 

“I took it in Chemistry, it looked cute,” He smiles and brings it up to his face to smell it. “Smells nice, too.”

“Very funny. Give it back, now. That’s my favourite pen.”

He shakes his head, mockingly, “It can’t be your favourite if you didn’t even notice I took it.” 

You huff in annoyance, “That’s because I was rushing to get out of the class so I could get away from you.”

Jake jokingly puts his hand on his chest and rubs it to pretend he’s in pain due to your comment, before placing the pen in his pocket, “I’m sure you’ll be fine for a few hours without it. Come to the Fantasy Draft and you’ll get it back.”

Not missing the opportunity to wink flirtatiously, he turns on his heels with his friends and leaves. 

Your protests against the event had no effect on your friends, who dragged you out of the comforts of your bedroom, completely wasting your perfect night of studying. Yunjin even went to the effort of picking out an outfit for you and tricking you into putting it on by pretending she needed inspiration of her own. 

“If I come to this thing and none of you get picked, I’m going to lose my shit,” You warn as you walk up to the door of the house that it was taking place at. “Whose place even is this?”

 Your question is answered by an immediate swing of the front door opening, revealing Jay in black jeans and a cream jumper.

It was nice to see him in a different colour for once. It made sense that this was his home - you noticed the Porsche parked in the driveway along with the three story house. 

“Hey, come in,” He says, leading you through the house, “It’s about to start, so you’re on time.”

Your eyes search Jay’s large mansion looking house until they meet a familiar individual. 

You take notice of the girl sitting at his side, recognising her from walking around the hallways at school.

Without taking another look at him, you take a seat on the couch and Yunjin follows.

“Jake strikes again,” She says, staring at the girl beside him who's too busy giggling at whatever he’s saying to notice you staring her down.

“Expected.”

That feeling from Chemistry seemed to make its way back, you felt your chest ache slightly. But again, you pushed it away just in time for Jay to return and for the Cupid Fantasy Draft to start.

Jay takes a seat at the centre and begins explaining the rules, “Listen, I don’t know who made this idea but I’ll just go through the rules and shit. We go in order and you pick someone who is “yours” for the entire year. Get it?” 

There are no interruptions, causing the event to commence. 

Jay goes first, and soon it goes around in a circle - with Yunjin and Taehyun surprisingly getting picked - until the last one left is Jake.

His turn makes everyone stop and listen. You weren’t the only one surprised that he was taking part in this event, so you knew people would be talking about the lucky pick all year round. After all, it was known that he wasn’t the type to stick to one person, so it was extremely shocking that he was going to choose someone to spend the entire senior year with. 

Taehyun leans in to whisper in both yours and Yunjins ears, “Betting 10 that he’ll choose Y/n.”

You shove his arms and moments after, Jake smirks at you, “I choose Y/n.”

Your face drops. Your heart, however, is jumping in happiness while an entire population’s worth of butterflies fly around in your stomach. Fighting the urge to smile at him is almost as irresistible as him. 

Fuck, he’s got me, you think to yourself. 

Everyone’s eyes are fixated on you as you leave the room, running up the stairs until you enter one of the many rooms of Jay’s place.

There were far too many thoughts running through your brain right now. 

Jake Sim, Sim Jaeyun. He chose you for the Cupid Fantasy Draft? 

A feeling of sickness started to rise within you. Why, why, why. You probably had a bounty written on yourself now without even knowing the reason why Jake had picked you. 

A knock on the door brings you away from the millions of thoughts imprisoning you. 

“Y/n?” Yunjin’s voice is clear as day and you open the door. “Are you okay?”

“I don’t know. This is so random,” You respond, putting your head in your hands.

Yunjin nods, “Look. Even though Taehyun and I have made so many jokes over the last two months about you and Jake, we both know how he is and to be honest, even though Taehyun somewhat a predicted it, he’s shocked as fuck right now. We all knew Jake would have picked someone tonight but for some reason, I still thought he wasn’t going to take this seriously.” 

“What if he isn’t?” You question. “What if he’s just using me as a plaything?”

“Well, Y/n, you’re smart enough to know when that’s happening.”

She’s wrong though. Over the last two months, you’ve enjoyed your jokes and snarky comments with Jake but most of all, you’ve had memorable conversations, too. 

From favourite ice cream flavours to biggest fears in life, you’ve enjoyed every single bit of it, so it was hard to tell if he was really using you. There was something about the way your conversations flowed that made you think Jake was beginning to open up to you. Now, thinking about it, you felt silly for perhaps blurring the line between Jake being a good talker and him genuinely having an interest in you.

Then again, he had picked you for the draft. This was all too confusing, all too much for only your brain to handle alone. 

“Yunjin, I have something to tell you.” 

Right there and then, you explain the last two months and how with Sim Jaeyun, time means nothing since he’ll have you wrapped around his finger whenever he wants.

By the end of the night, both you and Yunjin have opened the snack drawer in the room you’re in and have discussed quite a lot: Jay, what to do about Sim Jaeyun and how to exit Jay’s mansion without getting caught.

Right now, you’re on the third part where Yunjin is standing guard at the front door and keeping an eye out for Jake or his comrades. 

You rush down the stairs, just about to leave the door until…

“Y/n! Jake’s been looking everywhere for you,” Sunghoon puts an arm around your shoulder and drags you to the living room as Yunjin mouths an apology to you.

Once again, your eyes meet Jake’s figure. Only this time, he doesn’t have a companion stuck to his side. Instead, he has a drink in his hand that’s resting on the rip in his jeans and he looks bored to death. Again, hope begins to rise within you.

He looks up and jumps to his feet, “I thought you left.” 

“I tried to,” you admit, making Jake laugh heartily.

He beckons to the door, “Let’s get out of here.” 

You follow Jake, preparing to yell at him for his actions tonight but your anger disappears when he takes your hand in his and leads you out of the door and into his car. You can feel how cold his fingertips are from previously holding the cup in his hand, but you don’t seem to mind it at all.

Sitting at the driver’s seat, your eyes focus on his face. His nose is perfectly curved, accentuating the other features of his face such as his lashes that lay flat against his eyelids to match the shape of his eyelids. You’ve taken notice of this over the months; watching the way they crinkle when he laughs and the giggle leaves his lips.

“Soooo,” he breaks the silence and tilts his head to look at you.

“Don’t “soooo” me, Jaeyun. What on earth are you playing at? And, where’s my pen?” Even though you’re asking in such an angry tone, Jake can’t help but giggle at how endearing you can be sometimes. 

He reaches into his pocket and passes you your pen, “Here. I don’t know what you’re talking about, by the way. I didn’t do anything wrong.” 

He’s right, but you still argue, “You knew I didn’t want to be picked tonight, and you did it anyway. Why?”

Jake shrugs, “I took it as a challenge earlier. I thought it would be fun, too.”

Your eyes roll, “Is that all that matters to you?”

He nods, “Is there something wrong with that? Plus, this way we can do useful things that I’m sure are appealing to you, like study dates.”

There goes your heart doing backflips again. Dammit, Jaeyun. 

“You don’t have to say yes, you know. You said so yourself that nobodies forcing you to do this. But, I’m just saying that I heard you needed help for Physics and I’m the man for it,” Jake informs you. 

That was true, Jake had won every Physics award that existed at school. A few years back, he had even competed nationally and gotten first place. 

“As long as you don’t call it study dates, we’re on,” You say, much to both his and your surprise. 

“The only catch is,” He says, “You can’t fall in love with me.”

Rolling your eyes, you reply, “As if it was possible, Sim.”

Lie. Your heart was evidence of it. 

Jake decides to take you on a quick drive, switching from driving fast and slow just to get a panicked reaction from you to amuse himself.  

He parks outside a homely cafe, and exits the car without a word. Seconds later, he opens your door and helps you out with his hand reached out again. You were never one to deny affection from good looking guys. 

The cafe owner greets him immediately, “Jaeyun!”

 Jake rushes behind the counter and embraces the woman in a tight hug as you watch in shock, your mouth agape but still feeling the warmth radiate from the sight ahead of you. 

The woman leaves the hug to look at you standing near the door, a smile creeping on her lips as she looks at Jake for an explanation.

“Y/n, this is my mum,” Jake says, almost sheepishly if that was possible for him.

Your eyes widen as you manage to stutter out, “Nice to meet you, Mrs Sim.”

Why the hell has he taken me to meet his mother right now, you think to yourself. He literally just told me not to fall in love with him, and he’s making me meet his mother of all people?

Jake excuses himself to wash his hands, leaving you and his mother alone. She calls you over with a warm smile.

“Do you want anything to eat?”

You search the menu and end up choosing a milkshake. 

“So, are you Jaeyun’s partner?” She asks you. 

You shake your head, and she frowns, “That’s a shame. You seem like a nice person . I always hoped the one he would bring to me would be the one he was going to marry.” 

Pause.

You were the first one out of the hundred that got to meet his mother? There was no way. Why was he being so confusing?

Jake appears into the room with a smile, “Mum, we’ll take whatever to go. Y/n and I have a few plans for tonight.” 

His mum smiles at him, “Bring her more often. I wanna meet her properly.”

Jake’s ears go bright red as he nods, giving his mum a kiss on the cheek before leaving with you.

This couldn’t be possible; this had to be one big nightmare. 

“Your mum is very pretty,” you tell him and he smiles at you.

“She reminds me of you.” 

Your heart is thumping again, so loud that you’re worried he’s able to hear it. You wonder how he can casually say this and then turn back to whatever he’s thinking about. 

“Shut up, Sim.” 

You decide not to ask what it is that reminds him of her in you, but instead you bask in the comfortable silence lingering the soft breeze while Jake drives to your next destination of the night. 

He lets down your window so that the air can hit your face. He has the perfect view of your eyes fluttering close due to the comfort of how it feels against your skin. Your breath is hitched in your throat, in the most relaxing way ever. As Jake speeds up, you find his hand in yours in an almost reassuring manner; it’s as if he’s letting you know he won’t hurt you, as long as you don’t let him close enough. 

Pushing all your anxious thoughts away for later, you decide to enjoy this moment with Jake and the milkshake in the hand that Jake wasn’t holding. It simply felt right to you, more right than anything ever did for a long time. 

Jake takes you to a small hill that you both climb together, hand in hand since he says he’s worried that you’ll fall because of the dark which seems like an excuse that you don’t question.

You look at the view ahead of you; you’re encapsulated by it. It’s at a perfect position in the city, there's a perfect sight of all the enormous edifices lit by the hundreds of lights in each of their buildings and the moonlight hitting it square in the middle to only accentuate the beauty further. It takes your breath away so well that you forget Jake is pulling you to sit beside him.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” He says, softly to which you nod. “I don’t bring many here, even though you probably think I do. This is my place for when I feel anxious or something.” 

You look at him, and see that not only are the enormous edifices benefitting from the light of the orb in the sky, but Jake is too. He looks mesmerising under the moonlight.

“That’s shocking, Jaeyun,” You remark. “Didn’t know you felt anxious.” 

He nods, “There’s a lot about me that you don’t know.”

You notice that it’s true, all you knew was that Jake was trouble and the small details he began to tell you in your Chemistry lessons. You were intrigued to learn more about him. 

“Do you feel anxious right now?” You question. 

Jake hesitates, “A bit.” 

You nod, squeezing his hand to comfort him, but it was also for yourself. You needed to figure out the boundaries between you and Jake. 

You don’t know how it happens, but you spend almost three hours sitting with Jake. Half of it was spent in silence, enjoying watching the city work ahead of you while the other half was spent learning small facts about one another. 

A cursed yawn from you brings Jake’s attention away from the warm night and asks to take you home, much to your dismay.

He parks in front of your dorm, “It was a fun night, Y/n. I’ll see you at school tomorrow. Oh, and you have to come to my soccer practice tomorrow.”

“I have to?” You giggle.

He nods, “It’s part of the negotiations.”

You hum in response, walking off into your dorm.

You expected yourself to be a mess as soon as Jake left, but for some reason, you slept better than you did in months as you anticipated the sight of Jake in a soccer jersey.

2. I GOT THIS ANXIOUS FEELING, BUT IT GOES AWAY FOR A MINUTE WHEN I’M WITH YOU BREATHING.

You’ve been at your desk for hours, a coffee placed somewhere in the clutter of it all, seven books are laid out in front of you and not a single one of them makes any sense. You’re starting to see shapes in the paint of your walls and that’s when you decide to head off to bed. 

As soon as you reach the comfort of your bed, there’s a ring at the doorbell.  

Groaning, you stomp to your door where you see Jake with his hood covering most of his face that’s staring at your cat slippers.

“Nice slippers,” He comments, to which you smell alcohol leaving his mouth.

“Thanks. What are you doing here? Have you been drinking?” You ask, pulling him into your dorm.

You watch as he takes off the hood of his sweater, revealing a scar on his lip along with a bruised up eye. Gasping, you move closer to him to assess the wounds on his face.

“How did this happen?” You ask as you rush to your cupboards for disinfectants.

Jake takes a seat at your counter and begins to explain, “Jay, Sunghoon and I were having some fun when this girl's boyfriend got mad that I dated his girl before him and started to fight me. You should see him, though.”

He lifts his arm to show how his knuckles are bruised up, to which you kiss your teeth at. 

Rather than telling him about how maybe this wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t dated so many people, you focus on cleaning his wounds and treating them. 

Jake winces when the disinfectant touches his cuts, but allows you to keep cleaning. You only put plasters on them since thankfully, none of the cuts are bad enough to stitch them.

His eyes start to wander along your face so he brings up a finger of his to trace along your features which he decides he’ll blame the alcohol on tomorrow morning.

Before you die of a heart attack, you pull away from his touch, and pass him two ice packs; one for his eye and another for his knuckles, you also lead him into your living room. where you simply stare at the marks on his face until he gets awkward.

“It’s not that bad,” he assures you, rubbing your knee.

“You might wanna tell that to your face.” 

He giggles before wincing again and straightening the plaster on the corner of his lips. 

You don’t ask him why he’s come to your place, but instead, you grab a blanket from your room and place it over him to make sure it’s known that he can stay here for the night. 

As you’re about to leave and walk off to your bedroom, Jake grabs your wrist gently. 

“Stay,” He pleads. 

That’s all it takes for you to lay in his arms, with one of your hands reaching up to play with his brown locks, causing his eyes to flutter open and close and for his breathing to get heavier. 

Just as he’s about to sleep, Jake inches forwards and presses his lips onto yours. The metallic taste of his blood mixes with your saliva, but it’s not enough to make you pull away from your kiss. 

The kiss is deep, with both of you not wishing to pull away anytime soon. It leaves both of you breathless and you’re sure that Jake can now taste the cherry lip balm that you applied on your lips. The kiss makes you feel like you’re in the clouds and your head is filled with nothing but Jake.  

It feels like years have passed when you both pull away from the kiss, panting and pressing foreheads together. 

“Y/n,” Jake breaks the silence and you hum as a response. “There’s something about you that makes me want to change. Don’t leave me.” 

It was definitely the alcohol coursing through his veins that urged him to say this. Seeing Jake vulnerable was oddly your favourite version of him, he was always so soft with you and that was the time when he was the most open. For some reason, he kept this side of himself closed off but you didn’t argue with being the only one who saw this side of him, even if it wasn’t frequent. 

Clearly, that was the side of you that had become completely infatuated by him over the last few months. Honestly, every moment with him had changed you for the better. 

He somehow was always able to bring those stress levels of yours down in every way he could; whether it was taking you on a drive with the wind and Jake taking your breath away, or coming over with ice cream. Or even just coming over to talk with you just helped. 

You press a kiss to his cheek and wrap your arms around him to hug him tightly until you fall asleep in his arms that hold you close to his chest where you both felt a sense of security even if you knew he wouldn’t remember this in the morning and that by the time you woke up, there would be a blanket draped over your shoulders with no sight of Jake. 

3. I CAN TASTE IT, MY HEART’S BREAKING.

“You ready?” Jake pops out of nowhere, creeping up on you while you're packing up to leave the suffocating Math class.

Before you can even get a word out, he’s helping you pack up by snatching all your things and hoisting it over his shoulder.

“Jaeyun! Give me my things,” You scold him.

He shakes his head, “No, you’re taking too long. You can pack up when we’re sitting on the bleachers on the soccer field!”

Shoot, you forgot he had soccer practice today. This new routine with him wasn’t easy getting used to. Especially, since his reminders were done by force rather than nice texts at the beginning of the day that would have definitely been more helpful and effective.

He still manages to have space to hold your hand with a few fingers, even with many of your belongings in his hands; but you noticed over the months that Sim Jaeyun enjoyed physical contact. 

Now, you still had thoughts wondering if it was the vulnerable Sim Jaeyun that enjoyed always having a hold of you, or the generic one that was available to everyone. Either way, all you knew was that it made your heart run a thousand miles per second.

It was funny; you saw the eyes always watching your movements when Jake was with you. The envy was heavy in the air, but you never seemed to care. Everything else was unimportant when Jake was with you. 

“When does practice end today? I have plans” You jokingly whine, to which Jake snaps his head towards you, displaying the small  pout on his lips.

“It’ll end at 9, so you better cancel those plans.”

“What?! You’re practising for 6 hours?”

Now, Jake laughs, “No, we’re going on a date afterwards.”

Your ears perk up at this, “Where?”

“Not to worry for now, angel,” He presses a kiss on your cheek as he sits you down on the bleachers and returns your belongings while he makes way to the changing rooms.

Angel, angel, angel. All you can hear is the pet name he kept for you, echoing in your ears like a love song on repeat. 

Seeing as Jake and his friends liked to take centuries to get changed in their jerseys, you decided to keep yourself busy whilst burying your nose into a book when more people started joining you on the bleachers - one in particular catching your eye and that being a girl named Choi Heejin. You knew of her, but not properly since she didn't go to the same school as you. You also knew that she was Jake’s longest plaything, hence why she had been sending you dirty looks as she took a seat.

Feigning no sense of fear, you watch Jake and his friends walk onto the court and the sound of Jake’s laugh rings through the almost empty field, bringing a smile to your face.

Jake runs over to you, handing you his bag. You watch him glance at Heejin, displaying a somewhat shocked expression which you could tell he was doing his best to conceal. 

“Heejin, what are you doing here?”

“I came to watch, like old days,” Heejin smiles at him, her eyes radiating nothing but horrid intentions. Jake nods, taking in her words.

“Well, it definitely won't be like old times, since I have Y/n here with me.” 

Jake innocently smiles at you, leaving a peck on your lips before running off back with the guys.

Contrary to what you said before, there certainly was something bothering you about the way this girl was staring at you, but after Jake’s act before, you felt a lot more at ease.

Unfortunately, you had hoped to forget her presence but it seemed that she just had to cheer every time Jake had scored or done something remotely rewarding. 

This only just irked your temper, causing you to look at her with the dirtiest look you could muster up.

“Something wrong?” She drawls.

“Only the fact that you’re drooling over Jaeyun when he told you that there’s no chance of him getting back with you.”

She cackles, literally cackles, in your face, “Jaeyun, huh? I thought I was the only one who called him that.”

As much as you try not to show it, you’re sure she sees your face drop. 

What on earth did she mean by that?

She only continues to stab you with her words, “Do you really think he means what he said? What, because he’s been with you for a few months? Are you two even dating yet?”

You don’t say anything; no you and Jake weren’t dating but that didn’t mean this wasn’t serious. Did it?

Pleased with the damage she’s done, she gets up and grabs her things, “Well, tell Jaeyun my number hasn’t changed. I’m sure he remembers it - he’s always been good with numbers.”

You stare ahead as she leaves and you can feel the tears brim your eyes as Jake makes his way over, her eyes repeating in your head over and over again. A feeling of sickness rose in your stomach, you felt stupid for even falling for Jake and thinking he would fall for you even in this time. After all, he had told you not to fall for him and here you were, two months away from Valentine’s day with your heart only full with him. It was insane that one could have this much of an effect on you; it was as if the air you breathed in was just Jake. Only Jake. Everything was about him, Sim Jaeyun, your Jaeyun. 

But it wasn’t supposed to be, he specifically told you not to. Perhaps this was all part of his plan when he had chosen you for that stupid cupid draft. 

You didn’t expect Jake to be running after you but as soon as he gets close enough, Jake immediately wraps his hand around your wrist to bring you to a halt and spins you around to look at him, “Y/n, stop.”

You’re panting when you stop, tears falling down your face uncontrollably that you’re sure are burning into your cheeks. Jake tries to pull you into his arms, but you reject this notion which definitely catches him by surprise judging by the way his eyebrows raise.

“She called you Jaeyun, you said I’m the only one who called you that.”

“Y/n, that was a very long time ago.” 

As if that makes it any better. Millions of questions flow through your brain, all wondering almost the exact same thing and you question whether the thought has actually left your head since the day you felt some sort of adoration towards Sim Jaeyun: what am I to him? 

So, there goes it. 

“What am I to you?” The second the question leaves your mouth, all the strength that you had disappeared and turned into the nerve-wracking sick feeling reappearing in the pits of your stomach. 

“I already told you a while ago, Y/n. This is nothing, we are nothing to one another” his words cut you deeper than anything you’ve ever felt before. Deeper than Heejin’s only moments ago. 

This was an unexplainable type of pain. Seeing Jake’s eyes look at you coldly, as if he’s disappointed at the fact that you’ve fallen for him just like everybody else. As if the time you’ve spent together has meant absolutely nothing. Then again, this was Sim Jaeyun you were talking about. Of course, none of it meant anything - all the things he said to make you feel special and loved were nothing to him. You were a fool for thinking otherwise even for a second.

The pair of you only stare at each other with every passing moment, looking at one another until you simply can’t recognise the person in front of you, which ultimately brings you to turning away from Sim Jaeyun forever.

4. I KNOW I’LL FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU, BABY. AND THAT’S NOT WHAT I WANNA DO. (JAKE POV)

There was something about the way conversations flowed so easily when I spoke to you. It always led to me wanting more, craving more. Half the time, I didn’t even notice what I was saying until it was too late. But still, there wasn’t the usual feeling of when one overshares. No. Instead, I had felt a strange comfort hug me like a warm, snug air wrapping its arms around me and telling me that everything was going to be alright. 

It was odd and unfamiliar to the point where I would feel uncomfortable by all the foreign comfort. I had never felt something like that before.

Often, I would find myself sitting at the top of the hill late at night and staring at the busy city in an attempt to drag my mind away from you. Even so, my thoughts were being invaded by only you, it was so suffocating in the best way possible. All my attempts and not loving you were futile after years of pushing people away, all it took was a single lesson for you to draw my attention. And that was by far the scariest thing I had ever experienced in my entire life. It was enamoring; you were simply enamoring. 

I thought it must have been the alcohol that possessed me to choose you for the Cupid Fantasy Draft, but by the end of the night, I came to realise that it was my heart speaking for me. For once, my heart had knocked my brain out of the way and took control but something about it had felt so right even though every single bone in my being was urging me to resist. This was the first time in a while that I felt as though everything was right as it should be. The Cupid Fantasy Draft was the perfect opportunity for me to win you, so I took that opportunity. It would be a lie if I said that I didn’t know how in love with you I would get, but there was nothing I could do about it. I had let it overcome me until it was the only thing I was consuming.

Until, the dreaded moments when you weren’t beside me and I convinced myself that this was going too far and for some reason, I was thankful for warning you about me. You didn’t deserve it, you were far too precious for the ruins of me. You deserve someone better and I was going to make sure it had happened, even if it broke me. Which it did.

Along the way, there were times where I needed you and only you. My heart began to ache when you were not near, the oxygen around me began to seem inefficient because I was not breathing the scent of whatever perfume you had on and for that, my lungs were poisoned by the fumes of an unimportant air, an air that didn't have anything to do with. I began to rely on you for my ultimate survival - I only felt alive with you near me, with your hand in mine. There was no part of me that cared how it looked, or that my persona was being thrown away, until it was too late.

For a while, I contemplated being selfish and letting you completely in. I wondered what it would be like to show the feelings I had for you and to let myself love you and only you. I almost began to convince myself, but it was for the better that I was not 100%. The small percentage of me that was reluctant had saved you from me in the end.

When I saw Heejin that day, it was like a blast from the past; a reality check. This wasn’t who I am, I wasn’t supposed to be with you. You shouldn’t be with someone who only hurts you. I knew Heejin wasn’t just a reminder to me, but to you, too - which was why I had let her stay that day at the soccer practice. It was an impulsive idea that turned out for the better. Although I don’t know what she said that day, I knew whatever caused you to run out the fields that day had done my job for me. Perhaps that was me being lazy, perhaps that was me taking the easy way out, but the good part was that it started off what was pulling you away from me.

I had never felt my heart ache so much after seeing the tears stream down your face, the ache only worsening as time went on and I couldn’t do anything to resolve it but rather, the things I was about to do were probably going to make it even worse. I’m sure it did; I didn’t expect it to be easy after all this time but I had to remain heartless and strong with this last moment.

Watching you walk away had to have been the hardest thing I had ever encountered; the feeling of emptiness being the only thing I could feel for days on end afterwards and rejecting human contact until I could feel something. I longed to see your lips turn upwards to smile widely at me, pulling me into an everlasting enchantment. I longed to be suffocated by your endless love. Wasn’t that strange? 

5. CRYBABY.

The soft rain pattered against the window of the cafe that you were sitting at, Valentine’s Day decorations displayed all around the grand shop. 

Everything was blooming with love along with the freshness of the spring air flowing through your nostrils, sending a rejuvenating chill down your body. With a smile, you rested your chin on your palm whilst awaiting your date to come and whisk you away. 

The bells on the door caught your attention, making you spin around with a smile on your face and your eyes glistening with sparkles.

The excited look on your face  only dims when you see the wide smile on his pink lips as he walks in. Your eyes immediately notice the new bright blond locks of his hair flattened against his forehead, and his dark brown orbs finally meeting yours. 

Your mouth is open agape, as you stare at the boy at the door while he stares at you as well. 

For a moment, you turn back around, as if to dismiss that shared moment with one another and ignore the way the world had paused for you two but the universe must have other plans since Jaeyun walks over to your table and takes a seat in front of you.

Although it's only been a few months, the feeling of being sat with one another is so unfamiliarly strange, until he cracks that smile, “How do you like my hair?”

“It suits you,” You say admiring the colour on him. “Why are you here, Jake?”

Ouch. His heart sinks, evidently since his smile falters.

“Jake, huh?” You swear you hear his voice break.

You almost laugh at him, “Well, I figured I should call you what your playthings called you, since I was one of them, after all.”

“Y/n-”

“Save it. There’s nothing left to say,” You shrug, taking your things. “I don’t know why you’re here, nor do I care. But, leave me alone.”

As you walk out of the shop, the bell announcing your departure, Jake follows after you.

“Y/n, let me explain!” He calls after you.

Your bag is slung over your head to stop the rain from hitting your face annoyingly until Jake drapes his hoodie over your head, revealing his bare arms from the white tee shirt he's wearing. Immediately, the smell of his cologne wafts through your nostrils, sending you in half a trance and halting your movements. In that moment, you’re back a few months ago when your entire being was enhanced by Sim Jaeyun. 

“What is there left to say, Jake?” You scream into the rain. Jake stares at you, wondering if the droplets down your face are tears or the rain. Soon enough, he figures out that it's your tears, and there goes the stab feeling at his heart once more. 

“I want this back,” Jake spits out. He runs a hand through his hair, catching his thoughts. “I can’t live without you. Every morning, I wake up to an empty feeling in my heart, the same feeling that I sleep with at night while I think only of you. You came into my life so suddenly, I didn’t realise how much I needed you. Well, I did, but I was so scared by it. When I found out you were going to be spending Valentine’s with someone else, I felt a part of me just.. break. I can’t do this without you. You have to believe me.”

Jake takes a step closer and takes your hand in his, awaiting your response to his serenade of love. It feels as though years have passed when you make a movement. 

Pushing Jake's hand off yours, you whisper, “I’m sorry.”

The earnest, pleading look in his eyes almost convinced you to stay, but you knew better. You knew better than to fall for this again. You didn't doubt that Jake’s feelings for you were genuine, but you definitely questioned if they would end up in flames again. That was a risk you weren’t willing to take. 

Ultimately, you were wiser than your heart therefore, you chose not to fall into the dark abyss of Sim Jaeyun again. It was a choice laced with agony and heartburn but it was a necessary choice for the sake of your heart.

You hoped that, one day, when Jake was better for you, he would be brought back to you as someone you could build something with. But, now was not the time. 

Jake watches you walk away for the second time, knowing this time it’s definitely the last time. Pools of tears start to leave his eyes as he clutches his heart. With every step you take away from him, a piece of his heart is carried with you and he wondered if these pieces will ever return to him. 

He wondered how cupid could be this cruel and if he could ever get over the mistake that lost him you. He knew that cupid’s mistake was going to leave a permanent imprint on his entire being for the rest of his life, but he knew it far too late.

HIII KASS ‼️‼️‼️

recently i js got out of a rlly toxic relationship with my bf, and it made me think! heeseung helping yn realize her abusive bf is bad for her??

can i be 🐮 anon?

Realize ┃L.HS

heeseungxreader

yn is in an abusive relationship, heeseung wants her to know that she deserves better.

cw: angst/fluff! domestic violence, hitting, swearing, abusive relationship, degrading.

wdct: 1.2k

tysm for your request. im so glad you're out of that relationship 💚 pls stay safe and don't sell yourself short bc u deserve a person who respects you and loves you.

═════════════

Third Person POV~

You'd be lying if you ever said this is the first time you've left your apartment in the middle of the night. It's definitely not the second either, and you're sure it's not the last. You're in a relationship, and have been in the same relationship for two years. You love your boyfriend dearly, and you're sure he loves you too, but alcoholism is a thing, sadly.

He works long days, and sometimes nights.. You'd like to think it's stress leading his actions. At least that's what you thought at first. All the time's he's come home slightly drunk, you were never bothered by it, but it seemed like he started getting more agressive as the long weeks went on.

Picking dumb fights with you over small things, getting irritated by simple touches or gestures. Slight agression over you not wanting sex from him. Everything just seems to have gone downhill the past few months.

He got home about an hour ago, at around midnight. You woke up hearing the shower, and you got out of bed, stumbling into the bathroom. "Baby?.." You call out lowly, and he peeks out from behind the shower curtain, scoffing. "I thought you were sleeping?"

"I was.. Sorry I didn't wait up for you." You apologize as he rolls his eyes. "I don't expect much from you anymore anyway.." He says as you frown, rubbing the sleepiness from your eyes. "What is that supposed to mean?.."

He turns off the shower, wrapping his towel around his waist as he steps out, his hair dripping onto his damp skin. "You're smart enough to put it together, aren't you?"

You're clearly puzzled at the annoyance in his tone, but he doesn't seem to care. "Did I do something wrong?"

He scoffs, grabbing another towel to dry his hair. "Let's see.. I basically never get sex from you, you don't wait for me at night, I hardly ever see you anymore, and you cop an attitude everytime I say anything to you." He argues as you sigh. "It's hard to want sex when you're always coming home drunk lately."

He raises an eyebrow at your words, stepping closer to you, you can smell the scent of his bodywash fresh on his skin. "Oh really?.. So if I wanted to fuck you right now, would you give in?.."

Your back hits the counter as you step back, your chest rises with each heavy breath as he traps you in between himself and the counter. "You've had a long day, and so did I.. Let's just rest.."

He chuckles, pressing himself against you, you can feel everything thanks to the thin towel he's wearing. "I think fucking you would help me relax way more.." Soon enough he's leaning in to kiss you, but you dodge immediately, pushing him away by the chest.

"Just put some clothes on and we can both sleep.." You suggest, only to be ignored when he pushes your hands away, attempting to kiss you again.

This time you shove him away, leaving the bathroom. He follows, shoving you against the wall once he has a good enough hold on you.

"Please.. Just calm down." You attempt to move, only to be pressed firmly against the wall once more. You can feel a bruising pain blossom throughout your left shoulder blade from the impact of your back hitting the wall.

He attempts to tug on your sweats, but you hold them up. "Stop, just leave me alone!"

He pulls back, staring at you as he scoffs. "You stupid bitch.. Show some respect."

The next few seconds blur as you feel his palm strike your cheek, the pain burning itself into your skin as you immediately press your hand to the spot to soothe the pain.

Your eyes are watering and he's seemingly shocked by his own corse of action. As soon as he parts his lips to speak, you run past him, grabbing your phone before leaving the room.

You slip into some shoes, grabbing your keys and your wallet just in case. And then, you left.

Now you're standing in the rain, feet planted on the doormat of your closest friend's doorstep as you raised your fist to knock.

Though it took awhile, the door eventually opened, Heeseung staring down at you with a pitied expression. "Y/n?.. What are you doing here this time of night?.. Did you guys argue again.." He leaves before you can answer, soon coming back with two towels. He sets one on the floor so you can walk in and then he wraps the other one around you.

You finally release the well of tears that you tried so hard to hold back, and Heeseung's worry multiplies itself. He decides that comforting you is worth more than staying dry, so he hugs you, rubbing comforting circles onto your back.

"What happened..?" He questions gently, pulling back to look at you. You take a second to calm down before staring up at him. "He hit me..." You divulge with a sob, and Heeseung's expression twists confusedly.

"Your boyfriend?.." He asks, and when you nod, his eyes go dark. "I told you to break up with that asshole ages ago, and now he's hitting you?!"

It's clear Heeseung is upset, but you're not in the mood for the "I told you so" speech. "He didn't mean it... He just got upset.." You defend to which Heeseung sighs, pulling away from you. "Y/n.. Getting upset is no excuse to hit your girlfriend.. You need to end things with him.." He says blatantly and you shake your head. "He loves me.. I know it.."

Heeseung shakes his head at you, rubbing his temples. "He doesn't give a shit about you! As much as I know it'll hurt you, I can't just stand by and watch that fucker ruin you!" He yells and you go quiet, sobbing quietly. "Heeseung.. I love him..."

Something snaps inside him at your words. He grabs you firmly by the shoulders, leaning slightly closer to you. "And I love you..." He reveals, his own eyes glossed over. This is clearly something he's wanted to say for years now, but he didn't imagine it going this way. "Y/n.. I know you only see me as a friend.. But I care so much for you.. I can't watch the girl I love be treated that way by someone who isn't even worthy of her.."

You're still shocked at the question, but you nod regardless. "I didn't know you felt that way.." You mumble as he sighs, letting go of you. "I've like you since the day we met.. Sadly that bastard came along and stole you.."

"I'm sorry I didn't listen to you..." You apologize as Heeseung sighs. "I'm not mad at you.. You're the victim.. Promise you'll leave him?.." He asks as you nod, pinky promising him.

"Let's get you some dry clothes.."

═════════════

i hope this is good I'm not good at semi-angst fics

STOP I’M LITERALLY SOBBING

I’VE NEVER CRIED THIS HARD BECAUSE OF A FIC BEFORE 😭😭😭

Our Life | P.JS

jay x reader warnings: fluff, angst, smut (mdni), unprotected sex, cum plugging, oral (f.rec), major theme of death and grievance, character death, mentions of alcoholism (very slight, not for mcs), descriptions of pregnancy and birth, strangers to married couple trope, insane amount of fluff, verging on soulmate au, hopeful ending even though it's sorrowful, some parts not proof read, anything else lmk! wc: 34.8k synopsis: one year after his wife passed away, jongseong reflects back on his life, causing him to miss you more than ever a/n: hi! writing this jay fic has come at a really funny time in my life. it's just a fic, i know, but for some reason i'm writing it so personally - a lot of this has to do with me or how i view things, the relationships i have had with my loved ones etc. this fic is the manifestation of the love i want and love i hope everyone experiences. i know we all deserve to have someone care about us so much that we feel safe and cherished. you deserve to be happy, i hope we all find that person. as always, reblogs, comments and feedback is all welcome! i also cried like 5 times writing this so...be warned.

*this fic has serious themes of death, please do not read if this upsets you or makes you uncomfortable! nothing is murder and nothing is violent, but i understand this theme can be upsetting for people!

As Jongseong hears the door of his house gently push open, he can already hear the familiar sound of tiny feet racing towards him. Moments later, the littlest one, Minji, bursts into the room, her laughter bubbling over as she makes a beeline for her great-grandfather.

“Poppy!” she cries, her small arms already outstretched, launching herself into his lap. Thankfully, Jongseong is seated in his favourite recliner so that helps him catch her. A warm smile plasters on his face, ready for her joyful embrace. Minji, at just five years old, is a whirlwind of energy, always eager to shower her great-grandfather with affection. She’s a bundle of life that never fails to brighten the room.

Minhee, her older brother, is a little more restrained. At nearly eleven years old, he’s beginning to see himself as too grown-up for such open displays of affection, though Jongseong catches the fond glint in his eyes. Minhee hovers near the door, perhaps torn between maintaining his cool exterior and giving in to the pull of family warmth.

The children call him “Poppy,” a sweet nickname coined by their mother, Ara, when she was a child. Grandad and Poppa had apparently been too much of a mouthful for her, and the name stuck through the generations. Jongseong smiles to himself, recalling how it all began.

As he waits for Ara to follow them in, Jongseong is pleasantly surprised when Jeyou steps through the door instead. His son, of course, a father himself, offers him a smile that’s full of love and history. Jongseong’s eyes twinkle as Jeyou enters, taking in the sight of his son with a mixture of pride and nostalgia. So many years had passed, and yet, in moments like this, they seemed to collapse in on themselves, leaving just the simple pleasure of being surrounded by family.

And this day a little more bearable.

"Got yourself a couple of shadows today, haven’t you, Dad?" Jeyou says, glancing at Minji who has made herself comfortable on her great-grandfather’s lap, her head tucked under his chin.

"Ah, wouldn’t have it any other way," Jongseong replies, his voice low but full of warmth. He places a gentle hand on Minji’s back, feeling her soft breathing as she calms down from her excited entrance. "Though, I expect you’ll be getting the same treatment soon enough with your old age."

Jeyou chuckles and shakes his head. "Oh, she’s all yours for now. Ara’s just grabbing some things from the car, but she’ll be in soon. Couldn’t resist having her kids run ahead."

Jongseong nods. That sounded just like Ara. Always the one to let the children take the lead, full of the same unbridled energy she’d had as a child. Even now, as an adult, she managed to keep that spark.

"Minhee," Jeyou calls, his voice gentle but nudging. "Aren’t you going to say hello to Poppy?"

Minhee hesitates for a moment, then steps forward. His gangly limbs betray his preteen awkwardness as if he's still adjusting to his growing frame. He shuffles over, his eyes on the floor, before glancing up at Jongseong with a shy smile.

"Hey, Poppy," he mumbles, and though his words are quiet, there’s warmth in his gaze.

"Come here, son," Jongseong beckons, and Minhee approaches. He leans down for a brief hug, one that’s a bit stiff but no less genuine. Jongseong pats his great-grandson on the back, feeling the familiar ache in his chest - an ache that comes from seeing the passage of time so vividly in the people you love.

Minhee quickly retreats to the sofa, where he pulls out a book from his rucksack, burying his nose into it as if he hadn’t just shared a tender moment. Jongseong chuckles softly, knowing well that Minhee’s quiet affection is just as real as Minji’s exuberant embrace.

"Just like you at his age," Jongseong remarks to Jeyou.

Jeyou raises an eyebrow. "Was I that shy?"

"Not shy, just...reflective," Jongseong murmured, his gaze softening as memories of Jeyou’s childhood flashed before him. Even as a boy, Jeyou had always been deep in thought, though there had never been a shortage of mischief hiding behind those thoughtful eyes.

But before they could slip too far into the past, the familiar sound of the front door creaking open stirred the present moment. Ara swept in, arms full of bags, her bright smile instantly lighting up the room.

"There’s my favourite man," she called out cheerily, her voice as warm as always. She placed the bags by the door and, in her usual way, let her gaze travel from her children to her father before finally settling on her grandfather. The fondness in her smile deepened as she approached him.

"Hello, Poppy," she said softly, bending down to press a kiss to his cheek. "How are you feeling today?"

Jongseong reached for her hand, his grip gentle but steady. "Better now that you’re all here," he replied, his voice tinged with a quiet sincerity.

Today wasn’t an easy day, and everyone in the room knew it - except for Minji, who was too young to understand the weight the date carried. The family had gathered not just for the usual visit but to offer comfort, to keep his mind occupied. Jongseong had been dreading this day for over a week, the memories from years past creeping into his thoughts, but seeing his loved ones around him made it a little more bearable.

Ara steps back to look around the room, her hands resting on her hips as if surveying a scene she knew by heart. "Right, then. Who’s up for a cup of tea?" she announced, though she didn’t wait for a reply. She already knew her answer.

Disappearing into the kitchen, she busied herself with the kettle, placing three cups in front of her and tossing teabags into each. The familiar clink of porcelain and the hum of the kettle filled the air, blending with the gentle sounds of the family settling in. Jeyou, already feeling at home, sank into the couch, his gaze drifting to his father.

"So," Jeyou began, his tone casual but laced with concern, "has the doctor called you yet about your heart? Your review’s coming up in a few weeks, isn’t it?"

Jongseong let out a soft sigh, not wanting to weigh the room down with his health concerns, but knowing it was pointless to brush it off. "Not yet. They’re supposed to get back to me soon, but you know how these things go."

In his mind, his heart is as fit as a fiddle despite the pieces shattered and medical scans telling him otherwise. Being seventy-six puts him at that age where he doesn’t quite fuss over the little things anymore, knowing that when he starts to go, it’s his time. His family don’t quite see it that way, but they always had a knack for worrying.

They get that from you.

Ara returns from the kitchen with a tray of steaming mugs, setting two on the coffee table and one on the side stroller Jongseong uses as a side table. It’s old and it’s definitely not supposed to be purposed for keeping his things close by, but he does it this way anyway. 

“You’re running low on milk and sugar, Poppy,” she states, smiling softly. It’s not like Jongeong to let things run to the last drop, but she supposes it’s probably the last thing on his mind these days. 

“Thanks, sweetheart,” Jongseong returns her kind expression and sits comfortably in his chair.

Jeyou’s eyes drift from the steaming tea on the table to the two untouched cups sitting beside it, their contents long gone cold. His gaze then falls on the doset box, where yesterday's and this morning's pills sit neglected in their transparent slots. A dull ache forms in his chest, growing heavier with each passing second. It’s not like his father to forget things like this. Something in his stomach twists - an unsettling feeling that only deepens when he looks over at Jongseong.

His father, seated comfortably in the old recliner, is absentmindedly running his fingers through Minji’s hair, but his expression is distant. His eyes, usually full of life, are clouded, as though he’s drifting somewhere far away. Jeyou knows that look too well, his father isn’t here in this moment, not really. He’s somewhere in the past, locked in thoughts he won’t share with anyone.

"Kids," Jeyou says, his voice firmer than usual, "why don’t you go play outside? It’s too nice for you to stay in here."

Minji, always eager for an adventure, springs from her great-grandfather’s lap and dashes towards the garden, her giggles trailing behind her like sunshine. Minhee lingers a bit longer, his hesitation clear, but a quick glance at his grandfather’s face tells him everything he needs to know. This was one of those moments where the grown-ups needed to talk. With a quiet nod, Minhee follows his sister outside, leaving the room heavy with unspoken words.

Jeyou scoots forward on the couch, his hands clasped tightly, his heart feeling as if it’s weighed down by a stone. "Dad," he begins, his voice thick with concern, "are you sure you’re looking after yourself?"

As expected, Jongseong forces out a laugh, the sound strained and far from genuine. "Of course I am. What kind of question is that?" He waves his hand dismissively, as if brushing away his son’s worry could somehow make it disappear. But Jeyou can see the cracks in his father’s defences, no matter how hard he tries to hide them.

Ara steps in before Jeyou can push further, her eyes soft but her tone direct. "You look really tired, Poppy," she says, careful not to let too much of her worry spill into her words. She doesn’t mention the state of the kitchen, though it’s hard to ignore. The counters are cluttered with dirty dishes, empty food wrappers, and crumpled paper towels. It’s a far cry from the meticulous space Jongseong used to keep, everything in its place, nothing left unattended. His once-pristine kitchen now looks like it’s seen better days, like he’s given up on keeping it tidy.

And his appearance - Ara notices that too. His hair, usually slicked back with the neatness he always took pride in, now lies flat and lifeless, as though he hadn’t bothered with it at all. Even his clothes seem carelessly thrown on, lacking the care he once put into his daily routines.

"I’m okay, I promise," Jongseong says, offering a weak smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

But they all know better. He’s far from okay, and they can see it in every little detail. His body may be failing, but it’s his spirit that seems most worn down. And that’s not something any doctor could fix with medication or surgery.

Jeyou sighs, the weight of his father’s stubbornness pressing down on him. He knows how difficult it is for Jongseong to open up, especially about something as delicate as his feelings. "Dad, I know it must be tough on you today, with Mum’s anniversary," Jeyou says softly, his voice cracking slightly at the mention of her, "but please, don’t neglect yourself. We need you here. We can’t lose you too."

The room falls silent, the air thick with unsaid things. Jongseong’s face twitches for just a moment at the mention of his late wife, and Ara, sitting by her father’s side, silently curses him with a sharp nudge to his ribs. Her eyes flicker with disapproval, not wanting to mention you so blatantly.

With his smile faltering, Jongseong’s eyes begin glazing over once more as he looks away, as though staring too long into his children’s worried faces might break him. "I’m alright," he murmurs again, softer this time, but no one in the room believes him.

It has been a year since you passed, and while it was easy to put on a brave face for months, something about knowing he has been without you for one entire year puts him in misery, the same misery he felt the day he found you laying on your shared bed, last gasps of breath already evacuated from your body.

jongseong’s heart, once full of love and purpose, now feels unbearably heavy without you. It’s not just the grief that weighs him down - it’s the love. A love that has nowhere to go, nothing to cling to. For over fifty years, his heart beat with the rhythm of your shared life, the quiet moments and laughter you wove into the years together. 

Now, without you, all that love is left to pool within him, filling the empty spaces with a bittersweet ache. He still wakes up wanting to tell you things, still reaches out for you in the night, only to be met with silence. That love, the part of him that was always meant for you, has no place to rest, and he feels its weight with every breath he takes.

He escapes to the past these days, just for the opportunity to see you again.

_____

The party is loud, an overwhelming hum of voices, music, and laughter blending together in a way that makes it impossible to think. The flat is small, much too small to hold the crowd that’s somehow crammed into every corner. 

People from all different majors are squeezed into the living room, the hallway, and even the tiny kitchen, balancing Tesco plastic cups on the edge of counters and bookshelves. It feels like the walls are closing in, the air thick with the smell of cheap alcohol and the heat of too many bodies in one space. Jongseong shifts uncomfortably, standing near the wall with his back pressed to it, hoping to stay out of the chaotic flow of people moving past him.

His friend, Sunghoon, is in his element, leaning over to chat with two girls from the science department. Jongseong can hear snippets of Sunghoon’s conversation - something about biology and "how easy it must be to share a dorm with a future doctor." Jongseong knows what his friend’s after. It’s the same for every party. Sunghoon is smooth-talking his way through the night, hoping to fuck one - or both - of the girls before the party winds down. Jongseong can't help but feel a sense of detachment from it all, wishing he were anywhere but here.

He glances down at his drink, swirling the last bit of beer in his cup, realising he hasn’t even taken a sip in the last half-hour. The music pounds in his ears and the conversations around him blur into a noise that grates against his thoughts. Everyone seems so eager to lose themselves in the moment, but all Jongseong can think about is how out of place he feels, like he’s in someone else’s world.

And then his eyes land on you.

Seated on the worn couch at the far end of the room, you look just as lost as he feels. Your shoulders are hunched slightly, arms folded across your chest, eyes scanning the room with a quiet detachment. It’s like you’re here, but not really. The party swirls around you, but you sit untouched by its chaos. There’s something familiar in the way your gaze drifts, a softness in the way you carry yourself, as if you’re silently wishing to be anywhere else, just like him. 

His heart skips, the noise of the party fading just a little as he watches you, wondering why on earth you are here, or where you even came from. He’s been dragged to enough of these house parties to recognise almost everyone; it’s always the same crowd of wasted university students, all looking for a cheap night and a place to get fucked up.

You shift slightly on the couch, adjusting your position as if you’re trying to get comfortable but failing. The small movement is enough to stir something in Jongseong, a quiet push that breaks through his hesitation of going over to speak with you. He pushes off the wall, weaving through the crowd, his gaze never leaving you. Each step brings him closer to you and further from the loud, chaotic energy around him.

When he finally reaches the couch, Jongseong stands there, smiling down at you. Up close, he notices the small details about you - the way your eyes are slightly glazed over like you're staring through the crowd rather than at it. Your posture is relaxed, like someone who's given up on finding anything remotely interesting in this chaotic scene. You’re lazily twirling a strand of hair around your finger, your other hand drumming absentmindedly on the armrest, and every so often, you let out a quiet sigh. It’s clear you’re bored, as if you're here out of obligation or maybe even on a dare, but definitely not because you're enjoying it.

Jongseong wonders for a moment if approaching you is the right move. Maybe you're waiting for someone, or maybe you'd rather just be left alone to your boredom. But he’s already here, and backing out now would be even more awkward. Besides, there’s a part of him that thinks you might welcome the distraction.

“Hey,” he says, his voice soft but just loud enough to be heard over the music. He gives you a small, tentative smile, trying to convey that he’s not like the other loser men at this party, that he’s not here to make your night more unbearable. “Is that seat taken?”

The sound of his voice pulls you from your thoughts, startling you for a split second before your eyes lock onto his face. And what a beautiful face it is. His sharp jawline, soft eyes, and the hint of smile lines add to his handsomeness. The dyed white hair that’s slicked back to showcase his fresh undercut makes your mouth dry, then water just a little as you catch yourself staring.

Shaking off the daze his looks have put you in, you nod your head and smile. “Actually, my friend, Imaginary, is sitting right here,” you joke, patting the seat next to you lightly, “but I think she might move for you.”

Jongseong smirks, charmed by your wit, and takes a seat, spreading his legs just enough that his knee brushes yours. A subtle, intentional move that sends a tiny jolt of awareness through you. The music pounds around you, and the room vibrates with the beat, but here, with him so close, it feels like you’re in a different world - a bubble separate from the chaos.

"Are you new?" he asks, his voice carrying a warmth that cuts through the cold disinterest of the party.

"No, but I don't normally come to parties like this," you admit, glancing around the crowded room.

"Why not?" His eyes stay on you, curious, almost as if he’s trying to decipher the puzzle of who you are. There is something so intriguing about you, his soul suddenly ignited by even the prospect of knowing you.

You gesture around you with a slight roll of your eyes. "Lots of drunk people with egos even though they're only uni kids? Not exactly my favourite." The words drip with sarcasm, your disdain evident in the flatness of your tone. You can’t think of anywhere worse than this - people stumbling around, half-shouted conversations about nothing of substance, the smell of stale beer and sweat hanging thick in the air. It’s a headache in the making, a mess of too much noise and not enough space, a place where everything blurs into a haze of chaos and bad decisions. You’d rather be anywhere else, where people know how to handle themselves without being obnoxious, where the air is fresh and the conversations have weight.

Your answer earns a snicker from Jongseong. He ducks his head, a smile playing on his lips, and for a moment, he looks genuinely amused - like he’s found a hidden gem amidst all the nonsense around him. He takes a second to soak it in, feeling something light and warm settle in his chest. 

When he glances back up at you, there’s a brightness in his eyes that wasn’t there before. "Okay, let me ask you another question, then - why are you here?" he asks, his tone playful but curious, like he’s genuinely invested in peeling back the layers of who you are. 

You tilt your head, narrowing your eyes at him, a smirk tugging at your lips. "I'm gonna have to start charging you for all these questions, y’know." There’s a teasing edge in your voice, but underneath it, there’s also a spark - something alive and electric, something that catches Jongseong off guard, a flicker in his heart.

He laughs softly, nodding along with a look that says he’s enjoying this more than he thought he would. It’s rare to find someone who doesn’t just play along with the usual small talk but actually pushes back a little, makes him work for it. He hadn’t expected you to have so much spunk and confidence from just watching you sit there, looking lost in thought. It’s refreshing - a sharp contrast to the superficial conversations that fill the room around him. 

In all honesty, he thought you might have pushed him off, unwilling to even entertain him, never mind willingly try and drag out the conversation with him. That’s what he gets for judging a book by its cover.

"I can pay for a meet-and-greet, don’t worry," he says, his voice low and smooth, proud yet playful. His eyes gleam with a challenge, like he’s throwing down a gauntlet he hopes you’ll pick up. There’s an unspoken dare there, a flirtatious edge that makes your heart skip a beat. It feels like you’re both dancing on the edge of something - something that could tip into something real, something interesting, if either of you is brave enough to take the next step.

“So,” he continues, leaning back slightly, more relaxed now, “why are you here?”

He takes a sip of his drink, and it’s then that he notices you don’t have one. You don’t seem to mind, though, and he doesn’t comment on it, but it strikes him as a little odd. Typically, if someone is having a fuck awful time at a party, they drown themselves in alcohol to let inhabitions go and just pray to God they don’t make a fool of themselves. He knows there has to be a story there, and he can’t wait to uncover it.

"Thought I would check it out. I hear they’re all the rage," you say with a wry smile, clearly feeling the distaste on your tongue. 

Truth is, you’re trying new things this year, pushing your boundaries to help form your character. You’re sick of hearing about all these experiences through the lenses of TikTok videos and Instagram posts from your friends; it’s time to start living out the life you want. Not everything will be your cup of tea - tonight if quite evident of that, you can certainly cross parties off your FOMO list - but there is no harm in trying different things,

“Eh, parties are overrated, if I'm being honest,” he replies, his eyes tracing the features of your face. You’re so beautiful but so fucking familiar. He doesn’t know you, he would remember someone as ethereal as you. But there is part of him that feels you deep inside, as though you’ve rocked something in his soul.

Like you’re placing yourself home in his heart.

"Okay. Then why are you here?" you challenge back, your eyes narrowing slightly with curiosity.

Jongseong leans in a little, lowering his voice as if sharing a secret. “I hate these parties. Can’t stand how loud and irritating they are. The noise, the drunk people who can't hold their alcohol, the same shallow conversations...” His words trail off as he glances around, his lip curling in mild distaste. “I’ve always been a people person, but…just not these people.”

Sucking your teeth, you nod, agreeing with every last syllable of his sentence. You feel this on another level, but considering he seems to be acquainted with parties enough to dissect and disregard them so easily, you still ponder your question. 

Raising your eyebrows, you silently wait for him to continue.  

“Y’know Sunghoon? The campus heartthrob?” he asks, raising an eyebrow. He hates to refer to his best friend as such, but that is literally his title within the university. Sunghoon is notorious for having girls and guys falling at his feet, kissing the ground he walks on because he has been voted Korea’s perfect face three years in a row. Jongseong doesn’t grudge it, he votes for his friend too, and he isn’t blind, he can see how attractive he is.

“Yeah?” you respond, intrigued.

“Well, believe it or not, that beautiful son of a bitch is my best friend.”

Considering the way this boy presents himself, you would have genuinely never guessed that he was friends with someone as high profile as Park  Sunghoon. However, it does explain why, even if he hates the parties, he attends nonetheless. 

You chuckle, your eyes glinting as you begin to steer the conversation in the direction you both want it to sail. “You’re saying that like you aren’t equally as pretty.”

Jongseong flushes, his cheeks dusting a faint pink. The warmth spreads across his face, and he bites back a grin, trying to play it cool but failing miserably. It’s the tiny confirmation he needed to know that you want to flirt with him. That information alone perks his confidence up, although still shy under your flattering observation. He quickly plasters on a teasing smirk, fluttering his lashes dramatically and placing his hand under his chin, wiggling his fingers. “Oh? So you think I’m pretty?”

The scene before you brings out an even bigger laugh from you than earlier, though it’s not mocking or condescending - just pure amusement and joy. It’s infectious, and Jongseong feels his heart swell at the sound. He has the sudden urge to make you laugh like that for a long time, to see that carefree sparkle in your eyes again and again. He doesn’t want to say forever, but his heart is sure screaming it.

“I think you’re pretty, yes,” you say, your smile soft and genuine, your eyes sparkling under the annoying table-side lamp with its harsh white bulb - a stark contrast to the warmth you radiate. The lamp is obnoxious and stupid, casting its ugly, sterile light on everything around it, much like several of the people at this party. But Jongseong can't help but find it almost poetic that it’s illuminating something - or rather, someone - so captivating. 

There’s a sense of irony in how this harsh, artificial light only seems to highlight the genuine softness in your expression, the way you carry yourself with a quiet confidence that makes you stand out without even trying. You shine so brightly, even in a room full of noise and chaos, and Jongseong begins to sense just why he was so drawn to you at first glance.

It’s not as if you’re ‘not like other girls’ or whatever cringe, indie-female-lead syndrome that sounds like. No, it’s that in a room full of people competing to be seen, you’re the only one who Jongseong cares to know about. There’s a magnetism to the way you occupy your space - comfortable in your own skin, bored but not bitter, playful but not insincere. You seem untethered from the superficial games playing out around you, and that’s what makes you different. It’s not that you’re trying to be; it’s that you simply are - at least, in Jongseong’s eyes.

He feels a warmth spread through his chest, a lightness he hasn’t felt for a long time. For a moment, the noise of the party fades, replaced by the sound of your laughter, ringing clear and unforced, like something rare and precious in a place like this. It strikes him then - how easy it would be to just keep listening to that sound, to find ways to make you laugh again, to see how your eyes light up when you’re amused.

“How about we get out of here?” Jongseong suggests, his voice laced with a hint of excitement that he can’t quite hide. “Grab some food, and I’ll walk you home.”

You raise an eyebrow, your lips curling into a teasing smile. “Leaving this place does sound tempting...but here’s the thing, I don’t even know you,” you say, your words playful, though the interest in your eyes betrays how intrigued you really are.

He feels a flicker of embarrassment for not having introduced himself sooner. “Shit, sorry. Let me introduce myself.” He straightens up, setting his cup down with a small, almost sheepish grin. Then, with a playful seriousness that makes you chuckle, he extends his hand, inviting and warm. “I’m Jay, I’m 22 years old, I study music technology, and I’m single.”

You can’t help but smile at his theatrics, mirroring his gesture and placing your hand in his. The warmth of his skin sends a flutter through your stomach, your insides skipping in joy all of a sudden, but you ignore it, focusing instead on the easy banter between you. “My name is Y/N, I am 23 years old, and I am also single,” you reply, your tone matching his playful formality.

His grin widens, a flash of confidence in his eyes. “Sounds like the perfect match, don’t you think?” There’s a charm to him that’s hard to resist, an easy confidence that makes you feel like you’ve known him much longer than just these few minutes.

As you hold his gaze, you find yourself drawn to him in a way that surprises you. It’s not just his looks - though there’s no denying he’s handsome - it’s his energy, his wit, the warmth that radiates from him. Never in your life has someone matched your energy so well. He’s like a breath of fresh air in a space that feels stifling, and it’s intoxicating in a way that no drink here could ever be.

You knew, from that very moment, that you wanted to know more about him, and he knew he was going to marry you one day.

_____

"A treasure hunt?" you ask, a hint of amusement in your voice as you raise an eyebrow at him.

Jongseong had thought about you nonstop since the moment he walked you home from that party. A few stolen moments in your company, a brief but memorable conversation - it had not been enough. Not nearly enough. It was as if something inside him ignited that night, a quiet but unrelenting fire, burning through his thoughts whenever your face crossed his mind. The way you laughed, the way your eyes lit up when you spoke - it was intoxicating, and he found himself craving more. So much more. 

His friends had noticed too; he wasn’t subtle in the least. Every chance he got, he’d talk about you, about the brief time you two had spent together, already analysing every moment like a lovestruck fool.

And so, he’d come up with this date: a treasure hunt. A way to get to know you, to create an experience that wasn’t just the mundane dinner or movie date. No, this had to be different. You deserved different. Something unique. He’d spent days working out the details, coming up with clues, places, and the perfect way to make this evening special. He wanted you to smile, to laugh, to feel how much thought he had poured into this. 

Jongseong grins, proud of himself, "Yep. Well, sort of. I'm going to give you an envelope, and you're going to figure out the riddle."

Your lips curve into a soft smile, the kind that makes his heart race in a way he’s almost embarrassed to admit. You're used to men putting in the bare minimum. Dinner and a movie, sometimes even just a text at 11 pm, wondering if you were still awake. But this? This is different. He’d thought about this, actually put in effort. A treasure hunt on a first date? It was quirky, yes, but endearing. It makes you wonder if somehow, during that boring party, you found a ruby amongst diamonds. The idea makes your stomach flutter slightly and anticipation build.

"Okay," you tease, holding out your hand, palm up. "Where is this magical envelope with all the answers then?"

"Well..." Jongseong steps closer to you, the air between you buzzing with unspoken tension, playful and light. He pulls the envelope from his suede brown jacket pocket and dangles it just above your open hand. As you reach for it, Jongseong pulls away at the last second, flashing you a mischievous grin.

“Really?” You huff, your voice carrying more amusement than frustration. He’s playing with you, and you can’t deny you enjoy it.

"Not so fast," he says, heart thrumming in his chest so loud because fuck you look so beautiful, he just wants to be as close to you as possible. So, he steps even closer, his body towering over yours. The warmth from his body feels almost tangible, and the playful gleam in his eyes makes your heart stutter. "You have to answer me one question before I give it to you."

You can’t help but roll your eyes, though it’s all in good fun. "So not only do I need to use my brain and solve a puzzle, I also have to divulge personal information? You really know how to get a girl talking."

"Pretty much, yeah." His smile is smug, and you can tell he’s feeling particularly clever about his little scheme. It’s adorable, really. 

"And if I say no?"

"Then this date ends very quickly," he shrugs, feigning nonchalance, though you can tell he’s trying hard to mask his anticipation. He leans in slightly, voice low and teasing. "And you miss out on my meticulously planned adventure."

His words are light, but there’s a subtle undercurrent of vulnerability there. He’s trying to play it cool, but you sense how much he hopes you’ll say yes. That small spark of emotion hidden behind his teasing makes your heart soften just a little more. There’s something so sweet in how much effort he’s putting in, and you can’t help but feel drawn to it. Feel drawn to him.

With a dramatic sigh, you nod, "Fine, what’s the question then?"

Jongseong chuckles, clearly pleased with himself and his persuading manner. "Straight to the point. I like it." He holds the envelope out again, this time a little closer to your palm. "What’s your favourite type of food?"

You pause, considering for a moment before a smile spreads across your face. "Hmm... Italian, or! Caribbean."

He raises an eyebrow at your sudden burst of enthusiasm. "Both?"

"I mean, how could I possibly choose between ravioli and kabritu stoba?" You laugh, feeling the lightness of the conversation flow easily between you. This is nice, it feels like you have somehow known each other for years.

"Fair enough," he says, nodding approvingly. He waves the envelope slightly, catching your attention. "Now, open this."

You tear it open carefully, unfolding the piece of paper inside. The words are written in neat, careful handwriting, a small clue to the meticulous planning that went into this.

"To taste where flavours meet and blend, Find the 5treet where numb3Rs enD. Look where hungry students convene, The number’s hidden in this scene."

You frown slightly, reading it over again. Riddles aren’t exactly your strong suit, but you try to piece it together. Okay, there's a 53 in there, and R and D are capatilised...hungry students? Then it hits you, a beam of satisfaction at how quickly you managed to solve it shining from your pleased grin.

"53rd Note!" you exclaim, eyes lighting up. "The food stall on campus!" You look at him, a grin tugging at your lips. "I'm right, aren’t I?"

Instead of giving you a verbal answer, Jongseong simply gestures for you to lead the way. What he doesn’t expect, however, is for you to take his hand, intertwining your fingers with his in a way that feels so easy, so natural, it takes him by surprise. His heart skips a beat, something he didn’t think was possible in a moment as simple as this. Your hand in his feels...perfect. Warm, comforting, and everything he didn’t know he needed until now.

You feel the shift too - the way the simple touch adds a new layer to the evening. There’s something electric in the air, a sense of anticipation and excitement. It’s just a handhold, you tell yourself, but there’s more to it. The quiet understanding, the subtle acknowledgement of a connection that neither of you is ready to speak about just yet, in fear of jinxing something.

As you walk together toward the diner, the city lights twinkling above, the world feels a little smaller. It’s just the two of you, hands clasped, both of you teetering on the edge of something that feels new and exhilarating. Jongseong glances at you from the corner of his eye, his heart pounding in a way he knows he won’t forget. He’s down bad for you, that much he’s realised, fuck, he even came to this conclusion when you told him your name. But now, holding your hand, walking beside you on a slightly chilly evening, the sun setting in for bedtime while the moon starts its shift, he thinks maybe - hopefully - you might be down for him too.

_

The walk to 53rd Note is relatively short, yet it feels like time expands as you and Jongseong fall into an effortless rhythm of conversation. There’s no awkwardness, no fumbling through the typical, banal exchanges that often fill first dates - no one asking about favourite colours or talking endlessly about the weather surrounding you. Instead, the dialogue between you flows naturally, easily, as if you’ve known each other far longer than you have.

Jongseong’s questions are thoughtful, pulling you into a deeper conversation that takes you by surprise in the best way possible. "Why did you pick your major?" he asks, genuine curiosity lacing his tone. You find yourself opening up, explaining your passions and dreams, not feeling the need to hold back. There’s something about the way he listens that makes you feel heard, truly heard. His eyes never wander, his attention never falters - he is fully attentive.

"Is silver jewellery your thing, or are you allergic to gold?" he asks with a chuckle, glancing at the small silver ring on your finger. The question is odd but endearing, making you laugh. And when you ask about his interest in food, you learn that cooking is one of his many hidden talents. He admits to almost studying culinary arts before choosing music tech, a decision that sparks even more questions between you both.

The conversation continues, and you feel your guard slowly falling, piece by piece. You even ask him why he decided to talk to you that night at the party. His answer is simple, yet it holds weight. "I just wanted to get to know you."

By the time you reach the little food stall nestled on the corner of the student campus, you’re both lost in conversation and laughter. The place is a campus favourite, known for its amazing food and usual agonising long queues. It’s the kind of spot everyone flocks to after lectures or late-night study sessions. But tonight, something is off. The shutters are down, and the sign on the shutter swings lazily in the breeze, declaring the stall closed.

"I-It’s closed," you stammer, disappointment heavy in your voice, not because you can’t eat here, but because you feel a twinge of guilt knowing how Jongseong must have spent time planning all of this, and now you've hit a hurdle at the first stop. The last thing you want is for his carefully thought-out plan to be ruined so suddenly.

But when you turn to face him, the smile on his face hasn’t faltered. If anything, it’s grown wider, as if he’s completely unfazed by the situation. "Come on," he says, his voice full of quiet confidence as he gently squeezes your hand and leads you towards the shutter.

The stall is small but charming, with a bright yellow exterior and hand-painted menus plastered along the walls. Colourful string lights hang above it, though they’re unlit now, swaying lightly in the evening breeze. You notice a small table tucked beside the stall, probably a place for students to gather and chat as they wait for their orders. Everything about this place radiates warmth, even though it's currently closed.

Jongseong raises his hand and knocks on the metal shutter, the sound loud enough to startle a few birds perched nearby. Moments later, the shutter rolls up with a slow creak, revealing a boy wearing an apron and hairnet on the other side. His face lights up as he sees you both, his excitement palpable.

"Two to go, please," Jongseong grins at his friend, whose eyes gleam with understanding. Jake, nods enthusiastically, already bustling behind the counter. You quickly realise this is all part of Jongseong’s plan.

"You... how did you know he was in there?" you ask, confusion and amusement blending together as you look between Jake, who is clumsily wrapping up your food, and Jongseong, who’s leaning casually against the counter, looking as if everything is going perfectly to plan.

Jongseong’s cool demeanour makes you smile. "I know the owner," he says with a nonchalant shrug. "He let me borrow the hut for a minute."

In truth, Jongseong had to beg Woobin - the actual owner - to close up shop during peak hours. It wasn’t an easy feat. He had offered everything he could think of in exchange: guitar lessons, study help, and even his favourite hoodie. Woobin had eventually relented after enough pleading, but only on the condition that Jongseong wouldn’t touch the stock. Still, it worked out, and now here he is, pretending it was all effortlessly arranged.

"The normal guy isn’t here, though?" you ask, glancing at Jake, who looks completely out of his depth as he fumbles with the wrapping paper. It’s clear he doesn’t normally work here, but you can’t help but appreciate his enthusiasm.

Jongseong shifts slightly, his posture still casual, but you notice the flicker of nervousness in his eyes. He takes a breath, his voice calm but tinged with something deeper. "Ah, well... I cooked this meal."

The words hang in the air for a moment, and you see a flash of vulnerability in him, a rare crack in his otherwise confident exterior. He’s laid himself bare now. The pressure isn’t just about whether this date is going well - it’s about whether you’ll like his food. 

For Jongseong, cooking is an act of love. Growing up, it had always been how his family showed they cared. His mum, his grandmother, they had taught him that food was more than just sustenance. It was a way to express emotion, to bring people together. And now, he’s hoping you’ll understand that.

He watches you carefully, his heart pounding in his chest as he waits for your reaction. This isn’t just any meal. It’s his way of subtly showing you how much he could care for you, not just tonight, but for as long as you’ll have him. You can feel the weight of his unspoken words, the silent hope behind his playful banter. It’s more than just food; it’s a gesture, a glimpse into how deeply he’s already fallen for you.

Jake hands over the dishes with an exaggerated flourish, grinning from ear to ear. "Enjoy, my beautiful lovebirds," he says, winking at the two of you. You stifle a laugh, watching as Jongseong’s face flushes slightly, the tips of his ears turning a light shade of pink. He’s clearly embarrassed by his friend’s teasing, and for a moment, you think he might actually throttle Jake. But you, on the other hand, find it sweet - endearing even - and thank Jake with a bright smile, not at all put off by the comment.

Being lovebirds with Jongseong isn’t hard to imagine, not really.

As you and Jongseong approach the small table near the stall, you take a moment to appreciate the surroundings. It’s a simple wooden setup, aged from the constant exposure to student life - scuffed by countless bags, elbows, and books. Yet tonight, it feels like it’s transformed into something more intimate as if the evening air and the quiet chatter in the distance have turned it into your own private dining space. The string lights above the stall, though unlit, seem to glimmer faintly in the twilight, casting a soft glow over the scene. The air is cool, but not cold, carrying the faint scent of campus greenery and the distant hum of city life.

Jongseong pulls out one of the two chairs for you, a small gesture, but one that sends a flicker of warmth through you. As you sit, he unravels the paper bag, the rustling sound filling the air, and the intoxicating aroma of the food reaches your nose before you even see what’s inside.

The first thing you notice is the kimchijjigae. The spicy tang hits you instantly, its deep red broth shimmering with flavour. The scent of fermented cabbage, tofu, and gochugaru wafts up, causing your stomach to rumble in anticipation. Beside it are two perfectly portioned servings of fried rice, golden and inviting, alongside bindaetteok - crispy mung bean pancakes that look so perfectly golden-brown, you can almost hear the crunch as you imagine biting into them.

Everything looks so carefully prepared, yet it’s simple, unpretentious. The kind of food that speaks volumes about the one who made it. Your heart swells as you realise how much thought went into this meal, into every tiny detail. It's not just about the food, it's about the care behind it.

"You made all of this?" you ask softly, your voice tinged with awe as you gaze at the beautifully arranged dishes in front of you. Despite the simplicity, the food looks incredible, and you can feel the thought and effort poured into it. You glance up at Jongseong, your eyes filled with admiration.

He nods, handing you a cup of water after pouring it carefully from the bottle Jake had given him. "Yeah," he says, his tone casual, but there’s an underlying nervousness in his eyes, as if he’s waiting for your reaction, hoping you’ll like what he’s made. "Everything’s vegan too. I wasn’t sure if you had any dietary restrictions or didn’t eat meat, so I went with the safest option."

That small detail, the consideration behind it, makes your chest tighten. He had thought of everything. You’d never mentioned anything about your diet, yet he had gone out of his way to make sure the meal would suit you, just in case. It’s such a thoughtful gesture, so full of quiet care, that it nearly overwhelms you. It’s not just the food he’s offering - it’s a piece of himself, his heart wrapped up in every bite.

Your heart swells with affection, and you smile so widely it almost hurts. "That’s...incredibly thoughtful," you murmur, feeling the weight of what he’s done settle warmly in your chest. You’re not used to people putting this much effort into dates, let alone cooking a meal tailored to your needs without even knowing them. In fact, you don’t think anyone has ever put this much effort into you as a person. It makes you feel seen, cared for, in a way that surprises you.

Without another word, you take your chopsticks and carefully lift a small piece of bindaetteok, its crispy edges crackling slightly as you bite into it. The taste is immediate; crispy on the outside, soft and delicate inside, with a rich flavour that bursts on your tongue. It’s perfect, so perfectly seasoned and balanced that you can’t help but let out a small, delighted squeal.

Your eyes light up as you look at him, your hands coming together in a quick, enthusiastic clap. "Oh my God, Jongseong!" you exclaim, your excitement bubbling over as your feet bounce under the table. "This is amazing!"

Jongseong lets out a relieved laugh, his shoulders visibly relaxing as he watches your reaction. His eyes soften, filled with a quiet joy that he can’t quite put into words. "I’m glad you like it," he says, his voice a little quieter now, the relief and warmth evident in his tone. But there’s something more in his expression, a look of pure contentment as if seeing you happy has made all the anxiety he’s been feeling completely worth it.

He wants to make you this happy forever.

You dig into the rest of the food eagerly, trying the kimchijjigae next. The broth is spicy but comforting, the heat hitting you just right without being overwhelming. The fried rice is fluffy, with a subtle but rich taste that perfectly complements the other dishes. Every bite feels like a hug, the kind of meal that fills both your stomach and your heart.

As you eat and chatter, you can’t help but look at Jongseong, this boy who’s already managed to sweep you off your feet without even trying, your heart doing most of the soaring. You see the way he watches you, the small smile that tugs at his lips every time you take another bite or tell him another story. He’s nervous, but proud, clearly pleased that you’re enjoying the meal. And in that moment, you realise how much he’s already starting to mean to you. This is more than just a first date - it’s the beginning of something, something that feels real and full of possibility.

As you finish the last bite, you feel a surge of warmth spreading through you—not just from the food, but from the entire experience. The way Jongseong has thought through every detail, from the meal to the riddles, makes your heart swell with affection. You smile, letting the emotion seep into your voice as you look up at him. "Jongseong," you say softly, holding his gaze, "this was...perfect. Compliments to the chef."

Without missing a beat, Jongseong's face lights up with pride. He stands up with an exaggerated bow, playing up his role as the triumphant chef, and gives a few playful nods to an imaginary audience. His movements are full of cocky grace, a confidence that’s both endearing and maddening in the best way. You can’t help but laugh, your body suddenly feeling warmer at how effortlessly charming he is - this is depth to Jongseong that you desperately want to unravel, layer by layer.

In more ways than one.

Still glowing with laughter, he reaches into his pocket and pulls out another envelope, teasingly waving it in front of you. "Now," he says, his smirk growing wider, "you want the next envelope?"

Nodding eagerly, you can barely contain the glee and anticipation bubbling up inside you. The treasure hunt has been so fun, and now you’re ready to see what’s next.

"Okay," he begins, placing the envelope on the table in front of you, his eyes glinting with mischievous delight. "But first, you’ve got to answer my question."

You nod again, this time pretending to adopt a serious game face, your brows furrowing in faux concentration as you prepare yourself for whatever difficult question he’s about to ask.

"Who was the first person you ever went to see in concert?" Jongseong asks, leaning in, his smirk turning a little more playful.

Your confident expression falters as you immediately dissolve into laughter, the memory of your first concert flashing vividly in your mind. You cover your mouth with your hand, trying to suppress your giggles, but it’s no use. Jongseong raises an eyebrow, tilting his head slightly in curiosity. "Oh, there’s a story here, huh?" he prompts, grinning wider. "Is it embarrassing?"

"Not embarrassing... maybe," you begin, still giggling as the memory takes hold of you. "It was... an ‘In the Night Garden’ experience. I was seven years old, and I got to dance with them on stage." You snort, remembering how excited and utterly starstruck you were as a child.

Jongseong blinks once, then twice, as if trying to process the image, and then bursts out laughing. He leans back in his chair, throwing his head back with full, hearty laughter that echoes through the quiet evening air. It’s a deep, unrestrained laugh that makes your heart skip a beat, the kind that feels as warm and genuine as everything else about him. You join in, your laughter melding with his, both of you giggling like children at the sheer absurdity of your revelation.

"In the Night Garden?" he repeats, still chuckling, his voice filled with disbelief. "The kids' show? I was expecting you to say something like EXO or SHINee!"

You hide your face in your hands, the realisation dawning on you that it is, in fact, kind of embarrassing. But you can’t help but laugh at yourself. "I did see EXO and SHINee later on, but they weren’t my first!" you protest between giggles.

"You didn’t think to lie?" he teases, his eyes dancing with amusement.

"Not at all," you say, your voice softening as the laughter dies down. There’s something wistful in your tone now, a hint of sincerity that catches even you by surprise. "I don’t want to lie to you, not about the silly stuff and…not about the serious stuff either."

For a moment, the air between you changes. The playful banter gives way to something deeper, a quiet understanding that passes between you. It’s as if, in this small moment, you’re both realising how much you want to be honest with each other - how much you want to truly know each other. You see Jongseong’s face shift, his teasing grin softening into something tender, something full of affection. He can see it, the way you’re falling a little deeper into him with every word, every shared laugh, and the joy that fills his face is undeniable. His eyes sparkle, and his lips curve into a smile so warm, it feels like a promise.

"Well," he says, pushing the envelope across the table toward you with a soft, satisfied sigh, "I think you’ve earned the next clue."

With a grin, you eagerly take the envelope, your fingers tingling with excitement as you carefully tear it open. The riddle inside reads:

"Under a bridge of lights, a river’s friend. Where music plays, the night will never end. So gather near, beneath the sky so bright, And hear the melodies that fill the night."

The moment you finish reading it, a confident smile spreads across your face. "Oh, this is easy," you say, wiggling your shoulders smugly. "It’s the Han River."

Jongseong nods, impressed but not surprised. "Of course. But there’s a little surprise waiting for you. Come on." He stands, holding out his hand to you, his eyes twinkling with proud knowing.

You take his hand instinctively, your fingers curling naturally around his. As you stand up, you find yourself moving closer to him, your bodies leaning into each other in a way that feels effortless, natural. The walk toward the river feels different, like every step brings you closer, not just physically but emotionally. The night air wraps around you, cool but pleasant, and the distant city lights shimmer like stars scattered along the horizon. The quiet hum of life around you fades into the background as your focus narrows to the warmth of Jongseong's hand in yours and the soft sound of your footsteps together.

Your heart beats steadily, not with nerves, but with a quiet certainty: you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.

_

As you approach the Han River, the usual serene atmosphere is broken by the soft hum of excitement. A crowd is gathered by one section, and you spot people seated in a semi-circle, the area aglow with warm, delicate fairy lights and scattered fake candles that twinkle like stars against the night sky. Amps are neatly arranged around a modest stage setup, cables snaking across the ground as if drawing people into the intimate space. The whole scene feels like it’s been lifted from a dream—cosy, inviting, and charged with quiet anticipation.

You turn to Jongseong, eyebrows raised in question. "Is this one of those busking things?"

"Not just any busking thing," he corrects you, his grin widening as he pulls two tickets from his pocket. His excitement is hard to contain as he watches you inspect them.

Your breath catches in your throat as your eyes fall on the print: Sam Kim, filming for Begin Again Open Mic.

"How did you—?" you begin, stunned, unable to process how he’d managed to pull off something so incredible.

"I might have stalked your Instagram a bit," he admits with a sheepish chuckle, though his expression is anything but embarrassed. "Saw you post about him a few times and figured it was a sure thing.” The tickets weren’t easy to get, though, that part he isn’t telling you. He had to sell one of his precious guitars to make it happen, but the look on your face right now? Totally worth it. 

Your eyes well up, not from sadness, but from a deep, overwhelming appreciation. There’s something unfamiliar yet beautiful blooming in your chest, a warmth that spreads through you and makes your heart race in a way it hasn’t before. "Thank you so much, Jongseong," you whisper, the words falling out on their own. 

Never have you looked at a man and felt this way, and you don’t think you ever will unless it’s Jongseong.

Before you can stop yourself, you step forward and wrap your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. At first, he seems caught off guard, his body stiffening for a moment. But then, as if the feeling clicks into place, he quickly relaxes into the hug, his arms encircling you with gentle but firm pressure. You feel him bury his face briefly into your hair, inhaling your scent, committing it to memory like it’s something precious he wants to hold onto. His warmth wraps around you like a protective shield, and for a second, the world fades away.

If this is what being with you is like, he never wants to spend another minute apart.

"Come on," he murmurs into your ear, his breath sending a shiver down your spine. "Let’s get our seats."

He leads you toward a blanket with his name written on a small tag in, neatly reserved in one of the best spots. As you approach, he helps you settle down onto the blanket, standing behind you attentively as you smooth out your skirt. It’s a simple gesture - making sure you’re comfortable, that your clothes are fixed just right and you don’t unwillingly flash the poor couple behind you - but it feels like so much more. Your skirt, a flowing, light fabric that swishes around your legs, catches the evening breeze as you adjust yourself, and you find yourself grateful for his thoughtfulness.

Once you’re seated, Jongseong slips down beside you, the space between you both comfortably close. He takes off his jacket and places it over your legs, to shield you from the biting cold wind from the river and reserve your modesty. 

Just as you settle in, the quiet murmur of the crowd dies down, and the soft strum of a guitar fills the air. Sam Kim steps onto the small, makeshift stage, his presence met with excited murmurs and appreciative applause from the audience.

You can’t believe it. Sam Kim, live and in person, just a few metres away. Your heart swells as the first notes of ‘Closer’ begin to play, the song wrapping around you like an old memory, one you didn’t realise you had been holding so close. The smooth timbre of Sam’s voice fills the cool night air, his words resonating deep within you.

You feel yourself lean instinctively toward Jongseong, and without hesitation, he wraps his arm around you, pulling you closer into his side. His warmth anchors you as the music washes over you both, your head resting lightly against his shoulder. He presses his chin softly atop your head, his hand lightly tracing your arm in slow, comforting strokes.

The tenderness of the moment, combined with Sam Kim’s voice singing about longing and love, stirs something deep inside you. As the next song begins - Seattle - its delicate melody and heartfelt lyrics unravel any composure you had left. Tears prick at your eyes, and you can’t help but let them fall as the song’s quiet emotion seeps into every fibre of your being. There’s something about the raw vulnerability in the music, in the moment, that makes it impossible to hold back.

Jongseong notices right away. Without a word, he gently tightens his hold on you, pulling you closer into him as if to shield you from the overwhelming emotion. He presses his lips softly against your temple in a tender, wordless gesture of comfort, his breath warm and steady against your skin.

As soon as his mouth makes contact with your skin, he feels sick in such a profound way, that all his love and realisation is now reaching from his toes, past his heart, and into his brain.

You glance up at him through your damp lashes, and he meets your gaze with such sincerity that your heart skips a beat. His eyes are full of unspoken promises, of quiet understanding. He doesn’t say anything, but the way he holds you, the way he looks at you, speaks louder than words ever could. In that moment, it feels like the music, the river, the night sky, and Jongseong are all blending together in perfect harmony.

The rest of the performance unfolds in a beautiful haze of music and soft touches. Each song Sam Kim plays feels like a gift, and by the time the last note fades into the night, you’re left with a feeling of warmth and connection that goes beyond the evening itself. It’s as though something shifted between you and Jongseong - a silent but profound acknowledgement that tonight was about more than just a date.

The final notes of the performance linger in the air, weaving through the soft hum of conversations around you. As the crowd begins to disperse, you wipe the last of your tears, touched not only by the music but by the entire night, Jongseong has crafted for you. His presence feels like an anchor, steady and reassuring amidst the emotional whirlpool of the evening.

"Are you okay, Y/N?" His voice is filled with concern, his gentle eyes scanning your face as though searching for any lingering sadness. You sense his earnestness, his desire to make sure every second of tonight was perfect for you. Jongseong knew you liked Sam Kim, but he hadn’t expected your deep connection to the music to stir such raw emotion in you. But now, seeing the impact it had, he’s certain Sam is officially his favourite artist too, simply because of what he’s done for you.

Smiling through the tenderness swelling in your chest, you nod and offer a playful pout. "I'm more than okay. Really, Jongseong, thank you so much for all of this. I don’t think I’ve ever had a date like this," you laugh, the joy bubbling up as you stand up, Jongseong quickly offering his hand to help you to your feet. His touch is light, but there’s an intimacy in the way he smooths out the wrinkles of your skirt, his fingers brushing over the fabric as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

A laugh escapes you again, this one softer, almost wistful. "I don’t even think I’ll ever have a date like this again."

But the truth behind your words hits deeper than you let on. You know someone like Jongseong is rare, a once-in-a-lifetime kind of soul. The universe doesn’t often gift the world people like him so easily, and yet here he is, standing before you, having planned the most thoughtful evening you’ve ever experienced. It feels like a miracle, like some kind of cosmic alignment that allowed you to meet him.

Jongseong, ever so sweet, tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear with a tenderness that makes your heart flutter. "Oh, you will," he says with a soft shake of his head, a playful yet sincere smile tugging at his lips. "Because I’m going to take you on dates bigger and better than this."

His words settle in your chest, a gentle promise that fills you with an almost dizzying sense of happiness. He’s not just thinking about tonight; he’s already imagining the future - your future together. What you don’t know is that during the mini-concert, as the singer’s voice crooned through the air, Jongseong was secretly planning the next date, and the one after that, and the next one after that one, and so many more. In his mind, he’s already picturing you both years down the line, holding hands when you’re old and grey, still laughing, still sharing moments like these. He’s jumping the gun here but that’s how much he wants you in his life, no, needs you in his life.

You reach up, your hand cupping his face, your thumb gently stroking the cool surface of his cheek. His skin feels smooth under your touch, but there’s a warmth beneath it, a warmth that spreads from him to you. "How about I plan the next one?" you offer, the words carrying a weight of confirmation - you want more. More moments like this, more laughter, more adventures. More him.

Jongseong’s eyes light up, his heart swelling with happiness. "Deal," he says, his voice low but laced with excitement. His gaze, however, drifts lower, his eyes falling to your lips. The air between you shifts, suddenly charged with a new kind of energy. He’s no longer just thinking about the next date; he’s thinking about now. The urge to kiss you swells inside him, consuming his thoughts. He wants to feel your lips on his, to communicate the emotions he hasn’t been able to fully express with words. His pulse quickens as he realises just how close you are, how easy it would be to lean in, close the gap, and make this night even more unforgettable.

You sense his desire, and a matching one blooms within you. Your heart beats faster as you step closer, rising onto your tiptoes. Slowly, almost hesitantly, you press your lips against his.

The kiss is soft at first, a delicate brush of skin against skin, but it carries the weight of all the unspoken feelings between you. Jongseong stills for a moment, his breath catching as he savours the sensation of your lips on his. There’s a gentleness in the way he kisses you, a quiet reverence as though he’s afraid to break the spell. His hand comes up to cup your jaw, his fingers threading through your hair as he deepens the kiss, but never rushes. Each movement is careful, slow, filled with a tenderness that makes your heart swell.

Your body tingles with warmth, a soft hum of pleasure spreading through you as you kiss him back. The world around you fades into the background—the quiet murmur of the river, the distant buzz of people - all of it disappearing as you lose yourself in the moment. His lips are warm and inviting, moulding perfectly to yours as though they were always meant to fit together. It’s sweet and unhurried, as if you have all the time in the world to explore the depth of this feeling.

As the kiss lingers, you feel the intensity of his emotions bleeding through, each press of his lips a silent confession. He’s telling you, without words, how much he’s already fallen for you. How he’s imagined a future with you, a lifetime of nights like this one. There’s a vulnerability in the kiss, an openness that makes your chest tighten with something more than affection. It feels like trust, like promise, like everything you’ve ever wanted but didn’t know you needed.

When you finally pull away, your breath mingles with his in the cool night air, your lips tingling with glee. His eyes are still closed, savouring the aftertaste of the kiss, as though he’s replaying it in his mind, etching it into his memory.

You both stand there for a moment, soaking in the adoration that seems to swirl around you. The Han River, mixed with the lights of the busking, and the love in the aire from the other couples, you feel it, all so immensely. Something has shifted. This isn’t just the start of something new - it’s the beginning of something deeply powerful. Something neither of you can quite put into words yet, but both of you feel it. It’s in the way he looks at you, in the way your lips just met, and in the way your hearts are already intertwining, bonding you to him for a lifetime.

Pulling himself away from the moment, Jongseong opens his eyes and grins down at you, kissing your forehead, desperate to keep his lips on you in some way. “Ready for the next one?”

“Oh, Absolutely.” Your answer is so self-assured and confident, there is no apprehension in your tone, only sheer enthusiasm to spend every waking minute with him.

Jongseong feels the same way, maybe even more than you. And he can’t wait for the day he gets to tell you how he fell in love with you in this moment.

_____

Laying in Jongseong’s bed, you slouch lazily against his headboard as you lose yourself in the words on your Kindle. The paragraphs of The Handmaiden grip you, pulling you into their twisted world, stirring a whirlwind of emotions inside you - a cocktail of disgust, hope, fear, and love. Love especially lingers on your mind, but little do you know that someone beside you is feeling that emotion just as intensely, perhaps even more, because the reason for his swirling heart is real and currently wearing his AC/DC t-shirt.

He stares at you engrossed in your book and for some strange, inexplicable reason, his chest feels tight and the pressure behind his eyes hurt, like he is a bottle of coke and there is a packet of Mentos just landing inside his soul.

"I fucking love you so much," Jongseong says suddenly, his voice soft yet undeniably passionate, carrying a depth that cuts through the silence of the room like a bolt of lightning. His body language or facial expression doesn’t change, in fact, the feeling has been inside of him for so long that speaking the words into fruition doesn’t change a thing about him. 

You freeze, the words on your screen blurring as your mind tries to process what you just heard.  Did he really say that? Maybe you misheard him. “What?” you ask, turning your head to face him, and once you see the sincerity in his face and the fire in his eyes, your heart begins to race, and your question is answered.

“I love you,” he repeats, more pointed this time so you know there is not even a wiggle of doubt, his eyes locked onto yours with a look so sincere it leaves you breathless. “More than my heart or my chest can hold in.” 

His confession takes you completely by surprise. It feels so sudden, so unexpected, that for a moment, you’re left speechless. You knew he cared deeply for you - his actions and gentle gestures have always spoken louder than words - but hearing it now, on a random Wednesday night, three months into your relationship, when you were just lounging in his bed, didn’t seem like his style at all. 

And you were right, Jongseong was always the one for grand gestures, for perfectly planned moments. He wanted to tell you over a candlelit dinner, complete with a big speech about all the reasons he fell for you, fighting the urge to tell you on your very first date. But he knew his feelings, he couldn’t deny them nor did he ever want to, however, maybe blurting out ‘I love you’ when he didn’t even know your favourite colour was a bit quick, so he decided to wait for the perfect moment, which he had guessed would be planned.

But there’s something so genuine about this moment - him saying it while you’re here, wearing his oversized t-shirt, your glasses perched on your nose, so absorbed in your book that you didn't even realise he was watching you. There’s no grand setup, no orchestrated plan - just pure, unfiltered feeling. Sometimes, you don’t need a big, fancy gesture; sometimes, the love is enough.

His hand reaches out to cup your jaw, his thumb brushing softly against your cheek. His touch pulls you in, makes you forget about everything else except him and the love reflected in his eyes. Somehow, he looks even more beautiful than he did 10 minutes ago.

You place your Kindle to the side, giving him your full attention, and clasp his fingers with yours, feeling the steady thrum of his pulse under your touch. “You love me?” you whisper, almost as if saying it too loudly might shatter the magic of this moment.

“Of course I do,” he replies, his voice as easy as breathing, because that’s exactly what it feels like to him. Falling in love is supposed to be scary and daunting, placing your heart in the palms of someone who could break it with one wrongdoing is enough to put people off giving and receiving the emotion. But Jongseong? He would give you every part of his body for you to keep hold of - for you to own. You are everything he needs in life, the only person he would start a war for, he trusts you completely; he has never felt anything this strongly before. 

Your chest feels like it’s suddenly desperate to connect with his, to close the gap between you both and merge yourselves as one whole being. His words sink into you, filling spaces you didn’t even know were empty. 

With a shaky breath, you hold back a tiny sob, the aura in the room too overwhelming for your heart. But not overwhelming enough to stop you from saying how you feel. “I love you too, Jongseong,” you confess, your voice trembling slightly, but not with uncertainty - rather with the sheer intensity of the truth.

He looks at you, searching your face for any hint of doubt. It’s not that he doesn’t believe you, but it’s just the slight thread of insecurity in being so vulnerable with someone. "You mean it? You aren’t just saying it out of obligation? Because you do-”

You interrupt him, squeezing his hands tighter. “I mean it. More than anything else that has ever left my mouth. I love you.”

A Cheshire smile breaks across his face, bright and unrestrained. He grabs your face in a rush, his big hands enveloping your cheeks as he begins to pepper kisses all over your face - your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, every inch of skin he sees squished between his palms - until you’re giggling uncontrollably. 

“Jongseong!” you squeal, your laughter infectious, and thus he keeps going, pinning you down gently, his weight warm and secure over you, his lips finding every spot that makes you laugh even harder until your sides hurt. This is what love is supposed to feel like, childlike and free, just as you two always are.

You are in love. So incredibly in love.

When he finally stops, he rests his forehead against yours, his breath warm against your skin. “I will love you until my dying breath, Y/N L/N,” he promises, his voice low and solemn. The serious current that accompanies the joy in his voice tells you all you need to know, instilling you with confidence that this man means every word and every emotion he is pouring into you.

A grin spreads across your lips, and you can’t help the heartfelt response that tumbles out: “I’ll love you until we’re food for the worms to eat.”

Your morbid but romantic description makes his heart thump, his expression turning even brighter. He laughs, a rich, melodic sound that fills the room, and tucks a strand of hair behind your ear, looking at you like you’re the only girl in the world. “Had to one-up me, huh?” he jokes.

“You know me, always one step extra,” you tease, pulling him down by the collar of his shirt.

The kiss starts slow, tender - a soft press of lips that speaks of newfound confessions and the quiet promise of forever. His lips are warm, moving gently against yours, and you can feel the way his breath hitches like he’s savouring every second, every little brush of skin against skin. Your hands find their way into his hair, tugging slightly, eliciting a low, rumbling groan from deep within his chest.

The kiss turns heated, a spark catching flame as his hands slide down your body, tracing the curve of your waist, pulling you closer until there’s no space left between you. He slots his body between your legs, his hips situated on yours as his member hilts against you. Your legs spread wider to let him fully lay on top of you, your boyfriend’s heart kissing your own with each beat.

His lips part, deepening the kiss, and you respond in kind, matching his intensity. The world around you blurs; all you can feel is the heat of his body against yours, the way his lips mould perfectly with yours, and the electric current that courses through you with every touch, every breath. 

Jongseong’s hand grips your hip, fingers digging in just enough to make you shiver, and his lips move with a hunger that matches the rapid beat of your heart. He’s pouring everything into this kiss - all his love, his need, his promise - until you’re both breathless and burning with a desire that you never want to end.

The kiss breaks for just a moment, enough for both of you to catch your breath and him to discard your t-shirt, but Jongseong’s lips don’t leave your skin for long. His forehead rests against yours, and the two of you share a lingering moment of closeness, eyes locked, hearts pounding in sync. There’s an unspoken understanding between you, a shared desire that flows in the charged air between you.

With a soft, almost reverent touch, Jongseong begins trailing kisses along your jawline, slow and deliberate, as though he’s memorizing every inch of your skin with his lips. Each kiss is a whisper of warmth, igniting sparks of pleasure that ripple through your body. You tilt your head back, giving him access, and he doesn’t waste a second. His mouth continues its descent, moving down to your neck where he plants open-mouthed kisses, his tongue brushing lightly against your pulse point, causing a shudder to run through you.

His hands, warm and steady, explore the curves of your body as he works his way lower, lips grazing the sensitive skin of your collarbone. He lingers there for a heartbeat, nipping gently before soothing the spot with his tongue. Your fingers tangle in his hair, urging him on, and he responds with a low growl that reverberates against your skin, sending a fresh wave of heat through you.

Jongseong shifts, his lips now trailing down to the valley between your breasts, each kiss more purposeful, more heated than the last. His breath is hot, his touch sure, and every movement, every press of his lips, leaves you aching for more. You arch your back, pushing yourself into him, craving the sensation of his mouth on your body.

As he continues his descent, kissing lower and lower, until he is at the band of your panties, his breath fans across your skin, and the anticipation builds with every second, every soft press of his lips against you.

"I love you, I love you, I love you," he murmurs between kisses, his voice thick with adoration.

You giggle, hiding your face at the chanting confession. You can’t believe a man so perfect is in love with you. Gently, you run your fingers through his hair and pout down at him, “I love you, too.”

The words brush down your torso and into Jongseong’s ears, eliciting a smile from him. That is all he has wanted to hear, from the moment he met you. He knows love like this is precious, and he never intends to waste it.

Carefully, his fingers hook into the waistband of your shorts and pull them down, your legs instinctively opening, showcasing your bare, glistening pussy for your boyfriend to see. It’s delicious, succulent, and all entirely for him to devour.

"So fucking pretty," he whispers, sending chills down your spine. The room feels hotter as he settles between your legs, tongue poking through his lips oh so teasingly to wet them, your clit weaping for attention. He does this to you a lot, makes your body react in ways it never has before, even after your first date you felt your panties soaking more and more to the point you dragged him into your dorm room and fucked him. 

Was it a smart idea to fuck a man on the first date? Not usually, but you knew from that day that you were willing to spend the rest of your life with him so, what was the harm in some fun?

Kissing your clit, Jongseong looks up to watch you as he always does, loving the way your face conveys the pleasure you feel. Even the simplest of touches has you under his mercy. As he begins to lap at your core with his tongue, you can't help but clutch his hair, your fingers tangled in the strands as you grind into his face. Your back lifts from the bed as you seek even more pleasure.

Overcome with how you taste, he doesn’t even register your fingers in his hair, pulling at it harshly when he circles your clit with his tongue. You’re so wet as he slurps you up but there’s so much it’s dripping onto his chin. It serves as motivation to keep going, to pleasure you as much as possible, to show you how much he wants to devour you, both body and soul.

Jongseong doesn’t get pussy drunk with girls, but he does with you. Addicted to the taste and smell of you, he just wants to rub himself all over you, covering himself in your slick as if to scent him, like you’re both wolves in some ABO universe.

“Don’t stop, Jongseong,” you groan out, the backs of your feet digging into his back as you pin him down as best you can, signalling to him your need for more. 

Smirking at your desperation, Jongseong’s tongue runs itself along your entrance and it makes you buckle, pushing his head in further. He continues his effort, making you a panting mess. His tongue was a gift from God and you’ll need to thank the big man later when you meet him for blessing you with a sex-god boyfriend.

A sex-god boyfriend who is in love with you.

Dipping his tongue in a few times helps him gauge how tight you are, seeing how much prep he needs to give you before he can fuck his love into you. As if reading his lewd thoughts, he feels your pussy squeezing, his tongue taking advantage and swirling around to hit more circumference of your walls. 

“I can’t wait to be inside of you, baby. To show you how much i really love you.”

It’s funny that he thinks sex would showcase his love any more than his eyes and heart already do. You know he loves you, you might have been shocked at how abruptly he said it tonight, but you’ve always known. It’s in the way he kisses you, how he cooks dinner for you even after long days, and it’s in how he would give up anything to see you happy.

Your clit is suddenly being simulated by his nose, it poking at it slightly the more bountiful he inserts his tongue. It feels otherworldly, “Jongseong, s’good, so good, fuck,” Your fingers harshly massage his scalp as you wiggle, close to cumming.

He knows it too, you’re dripping so much it’s leaking over half of his face. It’s so fucking hot how you’re a mess like this, just for him, only for him. Jongseong switches his tactics, lips now encircled around your clit and sucking harshly on it, the new sensation causing you to cry out, a new wave of your juices dripping down his chin and onto his bedsheets 

And just a few seconds later, you’re coming undone. 

Jongseong, ever pleased with himself, cleans you up with his tongue, sucking up the slick that’s flowing form your hole and drinking it greedily. You taste so good he could spend hours down here. But unfortunately, and selfishly, he needs to fuck you. Right here, right now.

Wiping your essence from his mouth, Jongseong crawls up over your body, placing gentle kisses up your torso, past your heaving chest, and back to your lips. He stares at you with something deep in his iris’, a promise that he will always make you feel this inspired, this gleeful, and never cause you any harm. 

When you’re so in love with someone, all the emotions come with it. And while you both encompass the very being of adoration and love, sometimes that red that represented your passion for one another, turned into a shade none of you liked.

_____

Your heels slam against the tiled floor of the hallway as you march through the dimly lit corridor of your apartment building, the sound echoing like the beating of a war drum. Every step sends a jolt through your aching feet, but the pain is nothing compared to the simmering rage boiling in your veins. You fumble for your keys, hands trembling with a mix of exhaustion and fury, the metallic clinking of the keyring mocking your every failed attempt. When you finally manage to fit the key into the lock, it sticks, just like it always does. You curse under your breath - a small, infuriating reminder of the list of things that should have been fixed, but like so many other things lately, were neglected.

You give the door a sharp push, the old wood groaning in protest as it swings open, the gust of night air brushing over your flushed skin, cooling the anger that’s blazing just beneath the surface. Without thinking, you slam it shut behind you, the force sending a jolt through your arm as the door rebounds off something - or rather, someone. Your boyfriend. The door collides with his face, eliciting a pained grunt as he catches it just in time to prevent further damage.

“Really, Y/N?” he groans, rubbing his jaw where the door had made contact. His voice is strained, more exasperated than angry, but it only fuels the fire burning inside you.

You toss your clutch onto the nearby table with a careless flick of your wrist, the sharp clatter slicing through the tense silence. Kicking off your shoes with more force than necessary, you whirl around to face him, your vision clouded by a searing flash of red-hot anger. You know you should apologise, at least for the door, but the apology sticks in your throat, smothered by the bitterness that’s bubbling up like a storm ready to burst.

Raking your fingers through your hair, you grip tightly at the roots, desperate to hold onto something, anything, to stop yourself from unravelling completely. “I don’t even want to look at you right now,” you spit, voice thick with venom, every word dripping with the weight of betrayal. Your expression twists into one of pure disgust as if just the sight of him is enough to set you off all over again.

You spin on your heel, determined to escape, but before you can make it to the sanctuary of your bedroom, you feel his gentle grip on your elbow. It’s a light touch, but it might as well be ironclad, and despite every fibre of your being screaming to pull away, you find yourself turning back to him, drawn by a force you can’t quite resist. You wish you could fight it - fight him, fight this magnetic pull that always seems to reel you back in - but your heart, traitorous as it is, weakens at his touch.

His eyes are steady, calm even, but the way his jaw tenses betrays the storm brewing beneath his composed exterior. You can see the flicker of frustration in the tightness of his clenched teeth, but it’s not directed at you; it’s aimed at the mess that’s wedged its way between the two of you, threatening to tear apart everything you’ve built together. He’s not angry with you, not even a little, but you can see the weariness in his gaze - the weight of a thousand unspoken words hanging between you like a fog.

“Too bad, because I don’t care if you don’t want to see me. We’re talking this out right now,” he says, his voice low but firm. He is not letting you stew in this mess, he hates the way your brain works, how it overthinks for hours, creating a mountain out of a molehill when he knows that one simple conversation can solve all problems.

He does fear that this might not be solved with a quick debate and kiss. This is going to take more than that.

You yank your arm away, swallowing the painful lump forming in your throat as you catch the brief flash of hurt in his eyes, like a knife twisting deeper. “Oh, sorry,” you snap, sarcasm dripping from your words, the sound bitter in your mouth. “What would you like to discuss first? The fact that you embarrassed me in front of my entire family and ruined my sister’s engagement party, or the fact that you punched my dad?”

Each word leaves your lips like a punch, each accusation sharper than the last. You watch as his calm exterior fractures, his eyes flickering with a cocktail of regret, anger, and something you can't quite place. The room feels like it’s closing in, the air heavy with the weight of things said and unsaid, as the silence between you sharpens, poised to snap at any moment.

Jongseong flinches, his expression flickering for a moment, the crack in his composure barely visible but unmistakable to you. He’s always been so unshakable, so infuriatingly composed during moments like this, and for a split second, you see the vulnerability beneath the mask - the guilt, the pain, the anger at himself. But he quickly steels himself, his gaze locking onto yours with a resolve that sends a shiver down your spine.

“You think I wanted that to happen?” he shoots back, his voice low and rough, trembling slightly with the effort of keeping it steady. His eyes bore into yours, dark and intense, as if searching for some kind of understanding in the sea of your fury. “You think I planned to lose it like that? That I wanted to make a scene in front of your whole family?”

His words hang heavy in the air, every syllable a plea for you to see him, to see the mess of emotions churning inside him, but all you can feel is the sting of humiliation, the sharp edge of betrayal slicing through your chest. 

The scene replays in your mind like a broken film reel, each frame more painful than the last. Your father’s slurred words, the way Jongseong’s posture stiffened, the moment things spiralled from heated words to fists flying. You remember the sickening thud of your father hitting the ground, the horrified gasps, and the wave of whispers that rippled through the room. Your heart had dropped to the floor along with him, and in that split second, everything had shattered - your sister’s engagement, your mother’s fragile composure, and the image you’d built of the man you loved. You can still hear the murmurs, each one laced with judgment, each one a knife twisting deeper.

Your dad has always been a kind man at heart, but the bottle changes him into someone unrecognisable, a man who lets the worst parts of himself spill out. You remember the nights as a child, hiding in your room while your parents fought, your mother’s angry voice telling him to sober up or get out, how he would vomit over the living room floor and have no recollection of it in the morning. It’s those memories - the helplessness, the fear, the shame - that have kept you from ever picking up a drink. 

You vowed never to touch the stuff, never to let alcohol turn you into someone altered, and Jongseong understood that about you from the start after you trusted him with your memories. He made the promise to you that night, quitting the moment you told him how much it meant to you, swearing he would never touch another drop again. You didn’t ask him too, he simply did it because that’s how much he loves you.

You step back, folding your arms across your chest, a protective barrier against the storm brewing between you. “You punched my dad, Jongseong!” you shout, your voice cracking under the strain of holding back tears. “You humiliated me in front of everyone. My mom was crying, my sister - God, do you even know what you did to her tonight? It was supposed to be her moment, and you ruined it!”

He steps forward, reaching out as if to touch you, to comfort you, but you take another step back, the distance between you widening. The urge to let him hold you, to fall into his arms and let the weight of tonight melt away is so strong it hurts, but you can’t. Not yet. Not when everything is still so raw, so jagged.

Jongseong breathes out and calms himself, “Listen to me,” he steps forward once again and he’s relieved that you don’t move. “I should not have acted like that, and that is what I am sorry for. But I will not let a man who has caused you so much pain talk about you like you are less than what you are. As long as my heart is beating, even when it stops, I will protect you from anything and anyone. I do not care if it’s family, or a stranger, or even yourself. You mean more to me than any other person on this planet and if I think for a second your heart is in danger, I am willing to do anything to protect it.”

His words hang in the air, raw and intense, vibrating with a passion that cuts through the tension like a blade. His gaze is locked onto yours, unwavering, filled with a fierce, almost desperate determination that pulls at something deep inside you. He’s closer now, just a step away, and you can feel the heat radiating off him, mingling with the cold ache of your own heartbreak. For a moment, all the noise in your head quiets, leaving only the thundering rhythm of your own heartbeat and the weight of his promise.

The room feels smaller, the walls closing in as the intensity of the moment settles around you. You’re torn between the anger that still simmers beneath your skin and the undeniable pull toward him, the man who’s both your solace and, tonight, your greatest source of pain. Jongseong’s words are like a salve, and though they don’t erase what happened, they start to soothe the jagged edges of your hurt. You can see the fear in his eyes - fear of losing you, of becoming the person you’ve always dreaded. There’s a vulnerability in him now, raw and unguarded, and it stirs something soft within you.

You take a deep breath, letting the tension drain from your shoulders, just a little. Your grip on the anger loosens, and the tight knot in your chest begins to unfurl, replaced by a slow, tentative warmth. Your fingers twitch, wanting to reach out, but you keep them at your sides, not quite ready for the full embrace of forgiveness but open to something gentler, something that feels like understanding.

“Jongseong,” you start, your voice quieter now, less a weapon and more a tentative bridge. “I know you meant well. I know you were trying to stand up for me. But you have to understand… that’s not what I need. I don’t need you to fight for me like that. I don’t need you to get angry on my behalf. I just need you to be here, to help me feel safe. Not like…” You trail off, your eyes dropping to the floor as you fight to find the words. “Not like this. We’ve been together for 5 years now, I told you my dad has his moments like this and as a family, we all chose to stick by him and support him, for mum’s sake. He is trying and sometimes he slips. Punching him and lashing out because he said some stupid shit he won’t remember in the morning isn’t the answer, it’s not what I want from you.”

Jongseong’s expression softens, the fierce determination in his eyes giving way to something deeper, more regretful. Honestly, he hates that you’re all so kind to a man who has caused you grief and misery your entire life, but you, your mum, and your sister are the kindest souls in the universe, it’s in your nature to see the good in people. Jongseong wishes your dad saw you all that way too, rather than taking advantage of the chances you give him.

He steps closer, his hand finally making contact with your skin and you instantly calm, the weight of his palm on your cheek grounding you. “I’m so sorry, baby,” he repeats, his voice breaking slightly, carrying the weight of his remorse. “I know what I did was stupid. I still don’t regret it,” he admits, his honesty ringing clear despite the regret in his tone. “I’d fight anyone who tried to hurt you, physically or emotionally. That’s how much you mean to me.”

You look up at him, the tears you’d been holding back now spilling freely. His confession doesn’t erase the pain, but it does offer a window into his heart - a heart that, despite its flaws and mistakes, beats fiercely in your defence. You can see the struggle in his eyes, the conflict between his protective instincts and the reality of his actions.

“I know,” you whisper, your voice quiet but unwavering. “I know you’d do anything to protect me. But if we’re going to be a family - when we get married - you’ll be part of all this. You have to understand that. You have to respect my mum and dad’s needs.” Your words are a bridge between your love for him and your love for your family. “If you can’t do that, then I can’t let you be a part of their lives. I need you to know that.”

Your voice trembles slightly at the weight of what you’re saying, and the look in Jongseong’s eyes shifts. He doesn’t speak right away, but his silence is filled with understanding. You can see your words land like stones in his chest, the gravity of your family’s importance settling in. He knows how much they mean to you, and the unspoken warning lingers: if he messes this up again, there’s no way forward. The very thought of a future without you sends a ripple of fear through him. He’s never imagined that possibility because, to him, there is no option. He won’t let it happen.

His stomach churns at the idea of losing you, but his hope brightens as you say ‘when we get married’ rather than ‘if’. “I’ll do better, Y/N. I promise, I’ll support you in whatever way you need me to.” His shoulders drop slightly as if conceding to the truth you’ve laid bare between you. “You’re strong. I should’ve known that, and I’m sorry for not trusting that strength.” His remorse is palpable, and you can feel the weight lifting slightly from your chest, the anger and hurt that had clouded your mind beginning to dissipate.

The room seems to settle, the tension slowly dissolving into something calmer, something more manageable. You look up at the man you love, really look at him, and see how much he truly cares - how deeply he regrets what happened, not just for you, but for everyone. His eyes are sincere, remorse shining in their depths, and for the first time since the night began to spiral, you feel a sense of peace.

You exhale, your own apology forming on your lips as the fog of anger clears from your brain. “I’m sorry too. For lashing out, for hitting you with the door…it was childish. I shouldn’t have acted like that.” A flush of embarrassment heats your face, the shame of your actions making you feel small.

Jongseong reaches up to rub his jaw, faking a wince, and thankfully, the playful gesture lightens the air between you. “Nothing a kiss can’t sort out,” he teases, his lips quirking into a small, pouting smile, trying to bring a bit of levity to the conversation.

You laugh softly, shaking your head. “Let’s just make sure we don’t cause a fiasco at any more engagement parties, okay?”

Jongseong chuckles slightly, his grin widening as he tilts his head. “What if it’s at ours? Do I get groom rights to cause chaos then?”

You raise an eyebrow, crossing your arms as you play along. “Well, you’d have to propose first for me even to consider that.”

Jongseong’s eyes twinkle with mischief and that same love that has always projected through from his soul as he leans in, lowering his voice to a playful whisper. “Just you wait, baby.”

_____

The heavy wooden doors of the chapel creak open, and Jongseong straightens his suit jacket, his fingers smoothing over the fabric of the black suit you had so carefully picked out for him. It’s tailored to perfection, hugging his broad shoulders and tapering down to a sleek fit at his waist. The crisp white shirt underneath feels a little too tight around his collar, not because of the fit, but because of the sheer enormity of the day. He inhales deeply, gathering all the breath he knows he’ll lose the second he begins his walk down the aisle.

At 34 years old, he’s finally getting married, and it still feels surreal. Even this morning, as he stood in front of the mirror, carefully adjusting his tie, it all felt more nerve-wracking than he could have imagined. His hands trembled slightly, not with doubt but with anticipation. It isn’t cold feet - far from it. Marrying you is the most certain thing he’s ever felt. In fact, the only thing weighing on his chest isn’t whether or not he’s making the right choice - it’s the fact that, for the first time in what feels like forever, you’re not by his side.

Last night, the night before your wedding, was the longest you’ve spent apart in years. You’d stayed with your sister, following the superstition that the bride and groom shouldn’t see each other before the ceremony, and while it seemed trivial at first, Jongseong missed you more deeply than he ever thought possible. Since that party so many years ago, he’s spent every moment he could by your side, and now, after sharing a home, building a life together, the thought of you not being there in his bed last night left an ache he hadn’t expected.

It wasn’t the marriage that was causing him anxiety. He couldn’t wait to marry you—to say the vows, to see you in your wedding dress, to call you his wife. No, what had his stomach in knots was the thought of walking down the aisle with all eyes on him. The idea of being the centre of attention, of every gaze following his every move, from the ball of his foot to the tip of his toes, made his skin crawl. Even as a kid, Jongseong hated being the focus of a room. 

You’d always been the one to handle social situations with grace, navigating crowds, talking to guests, and subtly keeping the two of you out of the spotlight when he needed it. God, he wished you were here right now to hold his hand and whisper something to ease his nerves.

But of course, you weren’t. Tradition had stolen you away from him this morning, and now, he had to face this moment alone. The chapel, though filled with friends and family, felt overwhelmingly empty without you by his side. His heart pounded harder in his chest as the reality of the moment hit him.

Suddenly, the soft notes of music swelled from the organ, pulling him from his thoughts. It was the cue the wedding planner had told him about, the signal that it was time for him to make his way down the aisle. He stood still for a moment, nodding to himself as he acknowledged what lay ahead. The attention, the eyes on him, the anxious fluttering in his chest - it would all be worth it the second he saw you at the other end of the aisle.

With a deep breath, he steps forward. His polished black shoes make a quiet click against the stone floor of the chapel, the sound echoing in the stillness of the room. Jongseong’s gaze flickers up briefly, catching sight of familiar faces in the pews. His mother, sitting proudly near the front, offers him a warm, reassuring smile. He tries to return it, but it feels stiff, nerves still crawling beneath his skin. His father gives him a subtle nod of encouragement, and Jongseong straightens his back, feeling the weight of their support behind him.

As he continues to walk, the scent of lilies and roses, the same ones you picked out together for the ceremony, fills the air. Sunlight streams in through the stained-glass windows, casting vibrant colours across the chapel floor - deep reds, purples, and golds dancing around his feet like blessings from above. He hears the faint rustle of fabric as guests turn their heads to watch him, but he keeps his eyes forward, focusing on the path ahead.

His palms are sweaty, and his pulse quickens with each step. The aisle feels impossibly long, like a steep hill with a drinking fountain waiting at the top. The rows of guests stretch on and on. Jongseong fights the urge to tug at his collar, to loosen the tie just a bit, but he knows it won’t help. Nothing can calm the storm inside him except you.

But as he nears the front, something shifts. The nervousness, the anxiety of being under watchful eyes, begins to ebb away, replaced by something else. Anticipation. Because just after this walk, after these few moments of discomfort, comes you. The love of his life. His future.

He greets your family with fondness and love as he reaches the end. Each one has become integral to his life, the definition of his second family. Jongseong's smile softens as he approaches them and offering a slight bow in respect. 

His future mother-in-law is sitting to the side, her eyes filled with warmth. Her hands are clasped tightly in her lap, fingers intertwined, though her expression is calm and composed. She has always been a strong presence in your life, and he feels the same quiet strength radiating from her now. She nods to him, her lips curving into a gentle smile that puts him a little more at ease. There’s a silent understanding between them - one forged through shared moments, family dinners, and heart-to-heart talks that had transformed Jongseong from a visitor into a son.

Standing next to your other bridesmaids is your sister, fidgeting slightly with the lace of her dress, her excitement palpable as the number one supporter in this relationship. She beams up at him, her eyes twinkling. She’s always been the one to bring lightness into any room, to ease tension with a well-timed joke or a teasing comment, and seeing her now, vibrant and full of life, reminds him of all the times she’d teased him for being so nervous about today. Her laughter and encouragement had helped him through many anxious moments, and her unspoken support right now is a comfort he hadn’t realised he needed.

They are his family now, just as much as his own parents sitting a few rows behind, and knowing that fills him with a sense of belonging.

Jongseong takes his position at the altar, trying to shake off the nervous tension building inside him. His friend Sunghoon is already there, waiting with a grin that’s equal parts mischief and pride. Sunghoon, who had been there for every milestone in his relationship, claps him on the back. It's surreal for both of them; after all, it was Sunghoon who dragged Jongseong to that dreadful party where you first met. Sunghoon had refused to let Jongseong skip it, even though Jongseong had dramatically declared he’d rather run naked through a field of nettles than attend. Now, Sunghoon stands by his side, proud of the role he played in bringing you both together and wearing the title of groomsman like a badge of honour.

"You look like you're about to get married," Sunghoon teases, laughter dancing in his voice. From where he stands, Sunghoon sees his best friend transformed. Jongseong’s usual cool demeanour is present, but there’s a deeper layer today - one of anticipation and raw emotion. His usually steady hands are clenched slightly, his jaw a little tighter than usual. Sunghoon notices all these small signs, but underneath them, he can see that Jongseong is just waiting to call you his wife, the need to call you Mrs. Park is what’s making him shake.

"Yeah? Too overdressed?" Jongseong jokes, trying to mask the nerves that refuse to leave him completely.

"Just a little," Sunghoon nudges him playfully. His smile fades into something more sincere. "You ready?"

Jongseong takes a deep breath before responding, his voice quiet but confident. "I don’t think I’ve ever been more ready in my life." He ignores the whispers and murmurs from the crowd, sounds he can't quite decipher. Will they be bad? Probably not, but that doesn’t stop his brain from trying to twist them into something else. What if they all think you’re settling? Still, he pushes it all aside, focusing on the one thing that matters: you.

He is so excited to see you. You had kept everything a secret - your dress, your hair, even down to your nails. He had tried every trick in the book to get even the smallest detail out of you, from sweet persuasion to playful pestering. He’d casually ask while you were busy with wedding plans or playfully guess what colour you might be wearing, trying to gauge your reaction. Each time, though, you would just smile coyly and shake your head, refusing to give anything away. Jongseong had groaned in mock frustration, but deep down, he knew it would be worth the wait. He was absolutely certain you’d look breathtaking, no matter what. You always look like the most beautiful person in the world, like the earth around you, only blooms to keep up with your beauty.

Sunghoon grins, breaking Jongseong’s thoughts. "I saw her earlier, y'know. Tried to talk her out of making a massive mistake." His tone is light, there’s no mistaking the fondness in his eyes. Sunghoon had actually visited you before the ceremony, not to convince you of anything, but to tell you how happy he was that you had come into Jongseong’s life. He had joked that he wanted a child named after him, but beneath the teasing, he was sincere. He told you how lucky he felt to witness true love up close, to see two people so in sync that it was like watching a real-life fairytale.

For Sunghoon, it was like one of the bedtime stories he read to his daughter, tales of love that transcended everything else. Sometimes, when he read those stories, his mind would drift to you and Jongseong, imagining the two of you as the characters destined for each other. Even his wife is amazed by the connection you share - two people who fit together so effortlessly that it was hard to believe. Sunghoon and his wife love one another so much, but they can recognise that you and Jongseong’s love is once in a lifetime, and they learn so much from you.

"Yeah? How did she look?" Jongseong asks, his voice tinged with hope. "Nervous? Cold feet? She’s definitely coming, right?"

Sunghoon throws his head back, laughing loudly, the sound echoing through the quiet church, eliciting some confusion on the faces of the guests. "She looks way out of your league, but no, she’s not nervous. She’s ready. In fact, she told me to let you know that you should cry when you see her. If you don’t, she’s marrying Jake instead."

Right on cue, Jake, the other groomsman, pops his head over Sunghoon’s shoulder with a wide grin. "And I will marry her in a minute, so you better get those waterworks going."

Jongseong can’t help but laugh, shaking his head at the ridiculousness of it all. But he knows you’re serious about the tears. Your man is not one for crying, he rarely feels the need for tears, but he has a sneaking suspicion you’re going to get your wish.

The music starts, and Jongseong stiffens, his heart slamming against his ribs as if it’s trying to escape his chest and rush down the aisle to meet you. It’s only been a night since he last saw you, but to him, it feels like an eternity. The shared bed had felt too big, too cold without you beside him, and in that quiet space, he realized just how much you completed him. He missed you, and though it might seem dramatic, the longing reminded him that this wasn’t just about nerves. It was about the indescribable excitement of committing himself to you, completely and forever.

He had wanted to do this years ago, perhaps two years into your relationship rather than waiting twelve. But you had been the practical one, insisting that you both build your careers, settle into life without the added pressure of a wedding. He hadn’t minded too much; after all, what was a few more years when you had forever to spend together?

As the soft strains of music fill the chapel, Jongseong freezes. It’s an original piece - the one he had composed for you way back in the beginning of your relationship. The ballad, a quiet testament to the love he held for you even then, was something he’d never expected to hear today. Each note flows seamlessly into the next, blending together like the way his love for you has always been: fluid, effortless, natural. 

For him, loving you has never been complicated. It’s as though the melody was written not just with the keys of the piano, but with the strings of his heart. The tears, which you had so eagerly asked for, begin to gather at the corners of his eyes.

Then he sees you.

You appear at the end of the aisle, and his breath catches. Words escape him because they’re not enough to describe how radiant you are. The light from the stained-glass windows dances across your white gown, making you look as if you’re wrapped in sunlight itself. The lace of your dress hugs your figure delicately, each intricate detail shimmering as if woven from the stars. Your veil, soft as gossamer, floats behind you, catching the gentle breeze that filters through the open chapel doors. Your eyes, bright and full of love, meet his, and in that moment, Jongseong knows - if ever there was perfection, it is you.

Your beauty is beyond anything he could have imagined, like a dream come to life. You are the embodiment of every love song, every poem, every whispered promise. As you walk toward him, it feels like time slows, like the world pauses to let him savour every second, every step. You are grace personified, and all he can think is how lucky he is that this is real, that you are his.

Beside you, your father walks proudly with his arm linked through yours. His face shines with pride, his entire being glowing with joy. Jongseong feels a surge of pride for him as well. Their relationship had a rocky start, but now, four years into his sobriety, your father has become someone Jongseong admires deeply. 

The way you and your family never gave up on him taught Jongseong valuable lessons in patience, compassion, and what it means to truly love someone through their struggles. Watching your father today, standing tall and proud, Jongseong knows that all the hardships were worth it. He understands now that loving someone through their demons isn’t easy, but it’s something only the most special people can do - and you are one of those people. You have made Jongseong a better man, and he is and always will be eternally grateful for that.

When you and your father finally reach the end of the aisle, Jongseong’s breath hitches as he sees you up close for the first time. He’s lost for words, his emotions threatening to overwhelm him. The tears that had gathered in his eyes finally spill over as he gazes at you. Your smile is so bright, most likely happy at his reaction, and he suddenly feels like his heart is trying to burst through his chest just to meld with your own; he is so privileged you hold his heart this way.

“You look…” he starts, but the words catch in his throat.

“Like I’m ready to be your wife?” you finish with a teasing smile, your voice warm and steady.

Jongseong shakes his head, his voice cracking with emotion. “Like my everything.” 

The way he says this, so pure and genuine, your smile falters just ever so slightly, your face now wanting to express an earnest love, the kind of expression you only look at the love of your life with.

Your father, watching the exchange, beams with satisfaction. There’s a tenderness in his expression as he shakes Jongseong’s hand, pulling him into a firm embrace. “I know you’ll look after one another,” your father whispers, his voice thick with emotion. “I’m so proud to call you my son.”

The words settle deep within Jongseong’s heart, and when your father steps back to take his seat, the ceremony begins.

As the officiant begins speaking, his voice soft but clear, Jongseong can’t help but marvel at how your hand fits so perfectly in his, your fingers warm and familiar, yet somehow new, in this moment. Every word that spills from the officiant’s lips feels like background noise; all Jongseong can focus on is you. The way you stand before him, radiating beauty and calm, is enough to make his heart swell to the point of aching. You squeeze his hand softly, pulling him back to the present. His thumb brushes over your knuckles in response, a silent message of reassurance, of love. It feels as if the two of you are existing in your own world, tethered together by this secret moment amid the hum of the ceremony.

Even in a room full of people, he will always only see you.

He glances at your face, catching a fleeting look of emotion dancing in your eyes, and it takes everything in him not to pull you into his arms right there. You’re holding it together so well, but he knows you too well. The slight tension in your grip, the way your breath catches every now and then - it all betrays the storm of emotion beneath the surface. And it matches his own.

When the officiant calls for the vows, Jongseong inhales sharply. This is the part he’s been waiting for, and yet, the part that terrifies him the most. Not because he’s unsure, but because there’s so much to say, so much love to express, and he hopes he can convey it all with the right words.

He turns to face you, both of your hands now clasped together. He can feel the slight tremble in your fingers, mirroring the nervous excitement coursing through his own veins. The vows - this is where he gets to tell you, in front of everyone you both love, just how much you mean to him. But even as he opens his mouth, his heart beats in time with yours, each pulse echoing a silent promise of forever.

Clearing his throat, he pulls the paper from his suit pocket, calming himself.

“Y/N. I should start by saying how in love I am with you. I think it’s pretty obvious, I don’t think my heart is even mine anymore with the way you hold it. I remember the first time I ever saw you, so bored and begging to be saved from that god awful party. But it’s funny if you think about it because I didn’t save you from anything at all, you saved me - in more ways than I could ever thank you for.

You are my heart, soul, courage, fear, wonder, and love. I am you and you are me. ‘Love is a condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.’ I remember hearing that quote and never fully knowing what it meant. But since we are two people sewn together with the thread of fate, I began to understand that for me to be happy, to live in this world without regret or misery, I need to make sure I love you with every fibre of my being, to make sure you’re happy, safe, and cherished until the very end.

So today, my love, I vow to love you exactly as you are. I vow to protect you, not just from the world, but from any doubts or fears that ever try to steal your light. I vow to be the one who stands by your side when life feels too heavy, to hold you when you need comfort, and to celebrate with you when life brings you joy. I promise to love you on the days when life feels effortless, but more importantly, I vow to love you even harder on the days when it’s not.

I promise to cherish the smallest moments, the quiet mornings and the late-night talks, the laughter and even the silences that only we understand. You have made me a better man, and every day with you feels like a gift I don’t deserve, but one I will never take for granted.

I vow to never let a day go by without reminding you just how much you mean to me. To wake up every morning and choose you, choose us, over and over again. I vow to be your protector, your partner, your best friend, and your greatest supporter. Whatever life brings our way - whether it’s joy or challenges - I will be there, by your side, holding your hand through it all.

And above all, I vow to love you endlessly, fiercely, and without reservation, because you are my heart’s home, and there is nowhere else I would rather be.

Today, tomorrow, and every day after, I am yours. Forever.”

As Jongseong finishes his vows, his voice steady yet laced with emotion, you feel tears slip down your cheek. Despite your best efforts to stay composed, the overwhelming love in his words makes it impossible to hold back. You mourn the people in the pews who don’t get to experience Jongseong’s love because it is unfiltered and pure, the love people dream of and never have. He watches you closely, his eyes softening the moment he notices your tears.

Without missing a beat, Jongseong reaches up, gently brushing away the tear with the pad of his thumb, his touch as tender as his words. His fingers linger for a moment, his smile growing fond and warm as if he’s silently telling you that it’s okay, that he’s here, and that he understands how deeply his words have touched you.

Jongseong leans in just slightly, close enough for you to hear him whisper, "Maybe I should have vowed to never make you cry." His playful tone does little to hide the way his own eyes glisten, the deep emotions brimming just below the surface. 

Your lips tremble into a small smile through your tears, feeling both overwhelmed and reassured by the way he’s looking at you - as though you are the most precious thing in his world. And in that moment, you realise, you don’t have to hold anything back. You’re standing here, with the man who will cherish you for the rest of his life, and there is no need for composure, no need to hide the tears or the love that pours from you so naturally.

The officiant gives a gentle nod, signalling it’s time for your vows, but Jongseong keeps his gaze on you, his hand still cradling your cheek as if to give you strength. His smile never falters, and in his eyes, you see nothing but encouragement, affection, and a quiet promise that he will be right here, every step of the way.

You take a deep breath, your fingers trembling slightly as you hold your vows, and the room quiets in anticipation. You glance at Jongseong, your heart swelling as you realize you’re about to marry the love of your life, the man who has been your everything for so long.

“I kinda wish I went first now,” you laugh softly, stepping back to wipe your tears, earning a round of laughter from the guests. Even Jongseong chuckles, his eyes full of warmth, and the pressure lifts just a little as you prepare to speak from the heart.

“I really can’t believe I’m standing here today, two seconds away from becoming Mrs. Park. Though, let’s be real - I’m never going to be the best Mrs. Park. That title is clearly reserved for your mum,” you say with a playful smile, looking over at Jongseong’s mother. She places a hand on her heart, her eyes shining with affection, and nods back at you.

“Jongseong, standing here before you feels like a dream I’ve had my entire life. It feels like everything in the universe has led me to this moment, to you. You are my heart, my home, and the one person who makes the world feel safe and beautiful just by being in it.

People think a soulmate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soulmate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. And you have changed my life Jongseong, so beautifully so. I am more confident, resilient, and passionate about my life because I have you beside me. 

There is so much love inside my body that is only reserved for you. Love is the reason we all continue to live, even through tragedies and heartbreak, we seek love in all of those moments because it’s worth living for. Jongseong, you make life worth living.

I vow to honor you with every beat of my heart, to cherish you with every breath I take. I promise to stand by you in every season, to be your unwavering support when the world feels heavy, and your biggest cheerleader when you need encouragement. I will hold your hand through the trials and celebrate with you in the triumphs, always knowing that together, we can face anything.

I vow to love you as deeply as the ocean, to be your steadfast anchor when the waves of life try to pull us apart. I promise to nurture our dreams, to build a life filled with wonder and discovery, and to always remember the simple, profound joy of being together.

You have taught me that love is not just a feeling, but a practice - one that grows and deepens every day. It is in the way we laugh together, the way we support each other’s dreams and the quiet moments when we simply hold each other close. I promise to practise this love with you, to make it a living, breathing part of our lives, one that we can carry into the afterlife and know that even if our bodies are apart through death, our hearts are always linked.

I want to be a wife who deserves you, one who never takes you for granted and gives you back tenfold the love you have for me, and God knows your love is vaster than anything else in this world. You are my heart’s truest song, and I vow to be the harmony to your melody, the gentle refrain that sings of our forever. I promise to be patient, to listen, to understand, and to always come back to you with an open heart.

Jongseong, today and every day, I choose you, not just as my partner but as my greatest adventure, my greatest joy, and my deepest love. Together, we will write a story that is uniquely ours, filled with love, laughter, and a bond that only grows stronger with time. You are my most cherished muse, wholly and completely.”

As you finish your vows, your voice quivers with emotion, and the room seems to collectively hold its breath. Jongseong’s eyes glisten with tears of joy and admiration as he kisses your forehead, his touch is tender and reassuring, and he smiles at you with a look of pure, unadulterated love. The room sighs with appreciation, moved by the heartfelt exchange.

The officiant, his own eyes misty with the beauty of the moment, clears his throat to address the couple. “Having heard these vows of unwavering love and commitment, it is now time for us to proceed with the ring exchange.”

Jongseong and you gaze deeply into one anothers eyes, the ceremony reaching its most poignant moment. The officiant gestures to Sunghoon, who steps forward, holding the rings with great reverence. With a knowing smile, he hands the rings to Jongseong, who looks at them with a sense of awe. This is it. 

“Jongseong,” the officiant prompts, “please place the ring on Y/N’s finger and repeat after me.”

Jongseong’s voice is steady but filled with emotion as he recites the traditional vows, “With this ring, I thee wed. It is a symbol of my love and devotion, a promise to cherish and honour you all the days of my life.”

As Jongseong slides the ring onto your finger, you feel its weight - a tangible representation of his love and commitment. You repeat the same words to him, your hands slightly trembling with the depth of your feelings.

The officiant smiles warmly at the couple. “May these rings be a constant reminder of the love you share and the vows you have made to each other.”

With the rings exchanged, the officiant addresses the gathering. “By the power vested in me, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Jongseong leans in, his gaze locked with yours, and the world seems to fall away, leaving just the two of you in this perfect moment. His lips touch yours with a tenderness that is both electrifying and soothing. The kiss starts softly, a gentle brush of affection, but it quickly deepens into something more passionate and heartfelt. His hands cradle your face, his thumbs gently brushing along your cheekbones, anchoring you both in the intimacy of the moment.

The warmth of his breath mingles with yours, and as the kiss unfolds, it feels like a dance - delicate and full of emotion. Jongseong’s lips move with a tender urgency, conveying the depth of his love and the gravity of the vows you’ve just exchanged. There’s gentle pressure, a shared promise in the way his mouth moves against yours as if he’s pouring all the love he holds into this one kiss.

The chapel’s applause and cheers seem distant, fading into the background as you’re wrapped in the warmth and sweetness of Jongseong’s kiss. His fingers gently trace the curve of your jaw, adding a touch of reverence to the moment. You can feel the thrum of emotion in every touch, every caress, as if he’s imprinting this perfect moment onto both of your souls.

As you slowly pull away, Jongseong’s eyes are filled with a mixture of joy and reverence. The intensity of the kiss has left both of you breathless, your hearts racing with the shared exhilaration of this new chapter. His gaze holds yours with profound happiness, and you see in his eyes the same depth of feeling that you’ve always known was there.

“I love you so fucking much, Y/N,” Jongseong confesses with more earnestness than you have ever seen in one human being. 

“I don’t think you’re supposed to swear in church,” you giggle, pecking his lips to rid him of the sin.

But he’s unbothered, his emotions outweighing etiquette. He shrugs and takes your hand in his. “I think the big man upstairs will forgive me this one time.”

As Jongseong takes your hand, the two of you walk down the aisle together, the applause from your friends and family echoing through the chapel, though it now feels like nothing more than a distant murmur. His thumb gently strokes the back of your hand, and every glance he steals your way is filled with an overwhelming sense of love and pride. The weight of the moment lingers sweetly between you, as if you’re both walking on air.

Once outside, the soft sunlight bathes you both in warmth, and you can’t help but let out a contented sigh. This is everything you could want. 

Jongseong, ever the gentleman, jogs to reach the car first, dramatically pulling the door open with a playful grin. “After you, Mrs. Park,” he gestures with a flourish, eyes turning into sweet crescent moons as the light beams from him.

You raise an eyebrow and chuckle at his antics. “You’re enjoying this, huh?”

“Can’t help it,” he winks, guiding you gently into the car. “I love how it sounds on my tongue,” he leans down until he’s level with your face, “Mrs. Park, Mrs. Park, Mrs. Park.” 

He will repeat it until he gets bored of hearing it, which will be never and a day.

As you settle into the seat, he quickly slips in beside you, and before the door is even shut, his lips are on yours again, more urgent this time. The kiss deepens with a fervour that wasn’t quite there at the altar, and you can feel his restraint fading. He pulls you closer, his hand resting possessively on your waist, as if he’s making up for all the time he spent holding back earlier - he would have gone all in but something about tonguing you down in front of a priest and about 30 of your closest friends and family didn’t sit well with him. His lips move hungrily against yours, each kiss more intense than the last.

You let out a soft moan in response to the sudden heat, and Jongseong smirks into your mouth, pulling back just enough to catch his breath, but not before brushing his lips teasingly against yours once more. The car starts moving, but his focus is entirely on you. His forehead rests against yours for a moment, his breath coming in shallow, heated bursts. The playful glint in his eyes returns as he taps the driver on the shoulder.

“Could you take us back to the hotel for a quick pit stop?” His tone is mischievous, eyes twinkling with intent.

You blink in surprise, your thoughts returning briefly to the chaos of the wedding day schedule. “But…we need to get our certificate signed, take pictures…the reception?” You eye him curiously, though a part of you already knows where this is going.

Jongseong just shrugs, utterly unbothered. “That can wait a minute. Do you have any idea how hard it was not having you last night?”

His words send a ripple of heat down your spine, and despite your initial protest, a smile tugs at your lips. “It was one night, Jongseong,” you laugh incredulously, though you know deep down you shared his struggle. There’s a certain magnetic pull between you that’s only intensified since the moment you exchanged vows.

But before you can say anything else, his mouth is on your neck, his lips trailing heated, deliberate kisses along your skin. He finds that spot just beneath your ear, the one that always leaves you breathless, and you melt into him instantly. Your earlier concerns about timing and schedules vanish, replaced by the undeniable, almost primal need for him.

Every touch, every kiss, is fuelled by the weight of the day’s emotions, and soon you’re lost in him entirely, giving in to the desire that’s been simmering between you. From love to passion, your relationship flows seamlessly between them.

Jongseong’s kisses are searing against your neck, sending shivers down your spine, and any remaining thoughts of the day’s schedule fade into nothing. His hands grip your waist firmly, pulling you closer as you feel the heat building between you both. The car ride blurs by in a haze of stolen kisses and whispered promises, the tension growing heavier with every touch.

Before long, the car pulls up outside the hotel, and Jongseong barely waits for the driver to open the door before he helps you out, his grip on your hand tight, his thumb brushing your wedding ring with fondness despite the heat pumping through him. 

The hotel lobby is a blur, neither of you paying attention to anything around you as he tugs you towards the lift. Once inside, his mouth is back on yours, pushing you gently against the wall, his body pressed up close, a low groan escaping his lips.

The moment the doors open to your floor, you’re both stumbling down the hallway, hands roaming, clothes being tugged at impatiently. The urgency is palpable, as if every second spent not touching is a second wasted. By the time you reach the room, Jongseong fumbles with the key card, barely able to keep his lips from yours as he finally pushes the door open.

You stumble inside together, the sheer size of your wedding dress catching between you as you attempt to navigate the small space. Jongseong laughs softly into the kiss, but neither of you cares as you pull at each other, the weight of your emotions taking over. His hands work swiftly to find the buttons and zippers hidden beneath layers of fabric, and you can feel his need for you in every motion.

Your lips part briefly, just long enough for you to gasp out between kisses, “We need to be quick, baby.” Your breath is ragged, your voice barely above a whisper, but the desperation in your tone mirrors his own.

“Quick…right,” he mutters, though there’s no sign of him slowing down. His hands are everywhere - your waist, your back, your hips - gripping and pulling as though he can’t get enough of you. He presses you up against the nearest wall, his lips finding yours again, deeper and more urgent than before.

As you pull him closer, the fabric of your dress rustles and tangles between you, but it only adds to the delicious mess of the moment. His hands slip beneath the lace, fingers tracing the sensitive skin of your thighs, making you gasp. He smiles against your lips, that same playful glint in his eyes, but his kiss is nothing but intense.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity of fumbling, Jongseong’s fingers work the last clasp on the back of your dress. The fabric slips from your shoulders, and the sensation of it gliding down your body makes you shiver. He steps back just slightly, allowing the gown to pool at your feet, his eyes following every movement with hungry intensity.

The moment he sees you standing there in nothing but the white lace lingerie beneath, his breath catches, and a flicker of pure desire ignites in his gaze. His hands, which had been so impatient before, now pause in reverence, as though he’s taking in every detail, committing this moment to memory.

“God,” he breathes out, voice thick with awe and hunger. “You’re fucking perfect, have i ever told you that?”

His words send a wave of warmth through you, your heart racing even faster under the weight of his gaze. Before you can respond, his hands find your waist again, pulling you to him. His lips crash against yours, the intensity of the kiss somehow even more fervent now that there’s nothing between you but the thin lace of your thong and his trousers.

His fingers trace the delicate patterns of the fabric, teasingly brushing over your skin in a way that makes your pulse quicken. His lips move from your mouth, trailing down your jawline to your collarbone, then lower, each kiss deliberate, driving you wild with anticipation.

“Jongseong…” You gasp, your body reacting to every touch, every kiss. The urgency from before still lingers, but there’s something deeper now - a need not just for passion, but for connection. The feeling that you’ve finally, truly become his in every way.

He smirks against your skin, clearly enjoying the way your body responds to him, his hands sliding over the lace as though he can barely restrain himself, feeling how wet you are for him. His lips find yours again, but this time slower, deeper, as if he’s taking everything in, the moment, you, all of it.

“Quick, right?” he teases softly between kisses, but there’s now no rush in his movements now. The two of you are lost in each other, and any notion of time or urgency is forgotten as he continues to explore you, making every second feel endless and yet not nearly enough.

Jongseong’s teasing words hang in the air, and you can’t help but smile against his lips, your heart pounding in your chest. The fire between you is still blazing, but there’s a tenderness now, an unspoken understanding that this moment is more than just physical. It’s the culmination of everything - every shared glance, every whispered promise, every touch over the past 12 years.

“I’m gonna fuck you, fill you up and have you walk around the reception with my cum inside of you,” he breathes out, his hands busy undoing his dress trousers, fingers fumbling before pushing them down, the fabric pooling to his ankles, quickly making friends with your wedding dress.

The mere thought if it has you deperate, and instantly, you’re jumping up and wrapping your legs around his waist, your heat craving his touch.  Jongseong lets out a low groan as you cling to him, the weight of you pressing against his cock driving his need to the surface. He catches your lips again, this time more fervently, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he practically traps you between the wall and his chest. The coolness of the hotel wall contrasts with the heat of his body, and the sensation sends a shiver down your spine.

“You drive me crazy, you know that?” he mutters against your lips, his voice a mix of frustration and affection. His breath is heavy, matching the rapid beat of your heart. He needs to be inside of you, and he needs it now.

As he adjusts his grip on you, his hand slides between your thighs as he pushes your thong to the side, lining himself up. The anticipation builds, and you moan softly, arching against him, silently pleading for more, the tip of his cock poking at where you need him most. He pauses for a moment, his eyes locking with yours, a small, knowing smile playing on his lips.

“Ready?” he whispers, his voice low and gravelly, as if daring you to answer.

You don’t need to say a word - your body tells him everything he needs to know, but your nod anyway. “Yes, fuck, Jongseong please.”

With one smooth motion, Jongseong thrusts into you, filling you completely. A gasp escapes your lips as your bodies meld together, the intensity of the moment sending sparks of pleasure coursing through you. He groans deeply, his breath ragged as he begins to move, each thrust deliberate and powerful, driving deeper into you.

Each thrust sends waves of pleasure through your core, your senses overwhelmed by the feeling of him inside you. The curve of his cock drags down your tight walls, each bump of your inner core being kissed by his bell, making your eyes roll to the back of your head.

His pace quickens, the need between you intensifying. Your nails dig into his back, holding him closer as he drives into you harder, deeper, the friction and heat building to an unbearable crescendo. The way he looks at you, his eyes dark and intense, filled with raw need and adoration, makes you feel like you’re the only thing that matters to him in this moment.

“God, you feel so good,” he breathes out, his voice hoarse with desire. His hips snap against yours with more urgency, his hand gripping the back of your neck as he presses his forehead to yours. “Gonna fill you up, yeah? Give you all of me just like you deserve.”

You can’t hold back the moans that slip from your lips, your body trembling as you near the edge. Every thrust, every touch, every breath sends you spiraling closer to that sweet release, and you can feel it building, tightening in your core.

“Can’t wait to start a family with you, baby,” he confesses, the sentence thoughtful yet primal, “What if I got you pregnant right now, huh? Would Mrs. Park like that?”

“Fuck, yes!” you mewl out, the way he says your new government name along with the promise of a family is all too overwhelming as it mixes in with the utter lust your body feels. You need him to fill you to the brim, to have each inch of him buried to the hilt of you while he pumps his seed deep into your womb. “I need you… so close…” you whisper, your voice trembling with desperation.

Jongseong's thrusts become more urgent, each one deeper and harder than the last. Your bodies move in perfect rhythm, his name slipping from your lips in a desperate moan as pleasure coils tighter within you. The world fades away, your senses filled only by the heat of his skin against yours, the heady scent of desire, and the raw intensity in his gaze as he watches you unravel beneath him.

“You’re so fucking beautiful, Mrs. Park,” he whispers, “So pretty, and all mine.” His tone is loving if through gritted teeth, parts of the syllables coated in the desire he has running through his veins.

“I love you, Jongseong,” you whisper, kissing all over his face as you feel yourself getting closer to the brink of euphoria.

He chuckles softly, eyes almost filling with tears. “I love you too, Y/N. So fucking much.” And without another word, he kisses you with so much passion and devotion that if you weren’t already breathless from the raw fucking he is giving you, you definetly would have felt the air escape your lungs.

The pressure inside you builds relentlessly, your muscles clenching around him, drawing him deeper. He groans, a low, guttural sound that sends a thrill of electricity through your veins. His lips trail back up your neck, leaving a burning path in their wake before they crash into yours again, his kiss filled with hunger and need, as if he can’t get enough of you.

"You're perfect," he breathes against your lips, his voice strained, thick with lust. His hands tighten on your hips, pulling you down harder onto him with every thrust, making you feel every inch of him. “Ready to be a mum, baby? Ready for me to fuck you senseless each and every day and use the excuse of trying?”

“Fuck yeah, Jongseong, I can’t wait.” The grin on your face contorts with pure pleasure as he takes your words and runs wild with them, making good on his promise. If it isn’t today, or tomorrow, or even in the next year, he will make sure he keeps fucking you, until both of you create something wonderful, until you create a family that’s bigger than what you both are now.

You cling to him, nails scraping against his back as waves of pleasure crash over you with every buck of his hips. His pace is relentless now, hips slamming into yours with raw, unfiltered passion, each motion pushing you closer to the edge. Your vision blurs, the world spinning as the sensation intensifies, your body trembling uncontrollably.

You can feel him pulsing inside you, the tension in his body telling you that he's close, just as you are. His name is the only word you can form as your release builds to a peak, the pressure inside you unbearable. He presses his forehead against yours, his eyes locked on you, completely focused as he watches you fall apart in his arms.

"Cum for me," he growls, his voice a rough command that sends a shudder through you.

At his words, the coil inside you snaps, and you let go completely. A cry escapes your lips as the orgasm tears through you, your entire body trembling violently as pleasure floods your senses. You grip onto him like he's the only thing grounding you, your nails digging into his skin as wave after wave of ecstasy courses through you.

Jongseong’s own release follows soon after, his body shuddering as he empties himself inside you, his groans of pleasure vibrating against your neck. His movements slow but remain deep, deliberate, prolonging the sensation as both of you ride the aftershocks of pleasure. You can feel his warmth spreading through you, just as he promised, and the thought of it sends a final tremor through your body.

For a moment, neither of you move, the heat of the moment still clinging to you as Jongseong’s weight presses you gently against the wall. His chest heaves against yours, and the only sound is the ragged rhythm of your breaths mingling in the charged air.

Slowly, Jongseong pulls back just enough to meet your gaze. His fingers trace softly over your flushed skin, and the intensity in his eyes gives way to a tenderness that makes your heart flutter. A satisfied smile tugs at the corner of his lips as he leans in to kiss you again, this time with a slow, sweet tenderness that deepens the connection between you.

“You okay?” he whispers, his voice soft and reverent as his thumb caresses the curve of your jaw.

You nod, breathless and still tingling from the afterglow. “More than okay,” you murmur, your lips brushing against his as you speak.

“Good,” he chuckles, his eyes glinting with mischief. He sets you down gently, supporting you until your legs regain their strength. “We have a reception to get back to, after all.”

With a deft, almost intimate touch, his fingers slip between your sensitive folds, gathering his essence before gently pushing it back inside you. His gaze remains locked with yours, a mix of possessiveness and adortation. “Keep that in there until I can steal you away again and give you more.”

Giggling, you nod, biting your lip. You really cannot wait for the day you have this man’s child.

_____

Jongseong bursts into the hospital, his breath ragged, his vision blurred by the panic that clogs his thoughts. The fluorescent lights overhead feel too bright, their sterile, clinical glow only exacerbating the coldness gripping his chest. A sharp antiseptic smell wafts through the air, mingling with the faint hum of machinery and the occasional cough from sick patients in the waiting area. The beeps of heart monitors and distant murmurs of conversation all blur into a single cacophony, lost on him as his sole focus narrows to one desperate objective: finding you.

His eyes dart wildly across the expanse of the lobby, scanning for some kind of guidance. There, tucked away in the corner, is an oak reception desk. The receptionist, a middle-aged woman with a sympathetic smile, taps away at her computer, unaware of the storm about to come her way. Jongseong rushes over, his heart pounding, each thud reverberating in his ears like the ticking of a countdown he can’t afford to lose.

"Excuse me, do you know where the maternity ward is?" The words tumble from his mouth in a breathless jumble, barely coherent even to his own ears. It doesn’t sound like him - this frantic, uncollected version of himself - but he doesn’t care. He can’t afford to. His gaze flickers briefly to the woman behind the desk as she begins to reply, her voice gentle, almost calming, in stark contrast to the chaos raging inside him.

"You're in the wrong section, sweetheart. Maternity is ward 48, it's down the ha-"

But he doesn't wait for her to finish. Her words are cut short as he spins on his heel, legs propelling him down the long, seemingly endless corridor. His heart is racing, but not from the sprint. It’s the weight of fear, the gnawing dread that tightens his chest and churns his stomach. He might miss it. He might miss you. Miss being by your side when you need him the most. The thought alone makes his insides twist, as though someone had reached into his ribcage and clenched his heart in a fist.

This is supposed to be a joyous moment - the birth of his son, your son, the culmination of months of waiting, preparing, and dreaming. But right now, all he feels is the gnawing anxiety that he won’t make it in time. That he won’t be there to hold your hand, to look into your eyes and tell you that you’re doing great, that everything will be okay. 

His mind races back to when he received the call from your sister, the news hitting him like a freight train. He had been at work, neck-deep in paperwork and deadlines. He had barely believed it at first. You weren’t due for another two weeks; surely, this was a mistake. Yet, here you were, two floors above him, about to deliver his precious son into the world.

But none of that matters now. What matters is getting to you, being by your side before it’s too late. 

His legs burn as he pushes himself forward, following the overhead signs that guide him toward ward 48. The corridors stretch out before him like a maze, every turn only amplifying the desperation pooling in his chest. The sharp click of his shoes echoes loudly in the silence, but all he can hear is the blood rushing in his ears, the frantic beat of his own heart drowning out everything else.

When he finally crashes into the ward’s front desk, it’s not graceful. His body slams into the counter, breath heaving, his muscles taut with adrenaline. He grips the edge of the desk as though it's the only thing keeping him upright. "Excuse me, what room is Y/N Park in?" The words come out strained, his voice thick with tension. Every fibre of his being feels stretched to the breaking point, as though his body is barely containing the swell of emotions surging through him.

The receptionist looks up, a soft smile tugging at the corners of her lips. There’s a knowing look in her eyes, one that says she’s seen this before - fathers on the verge of breaking, desperate to be there, to not miss the moment that changes everything. "Down the hall, third door on your left," she says kindly, nodding toward the direction he needs to go.

He doesn’t wait. With a sharp intake of breath, he pushes himself off the counter and bolts toward your room, his legs moving on autopilot, every step pounding with urgency. His mind races, imagining you lying there, scared or in pain, and it tears at him. You shouldn’t have to go through this by yourself. He swore to be there, to hold your hand through every step of this, and now he’s running on borrowed time.

The corridor leading to your room feels impossibly long, each door blurring past him as he counts them off in his head. First door, second door...third door. His hand trembles as it reaches for the handle, the weight of the moment crashing over him like a wave. He takes a deep breath, trying to steady himself, but the truth is, nothing can prepare him for this. The surge of love, fear, and anticipation battling inside him is overwhelming, but all of it pales in comparison to the thought of you.

When he opens the door, his heart nearly stops. There you are, lying in the hospital bed, your face flushed with exertion but glowing with a strength he has always admired. You look up, and the moment your eyes meet his, it’s as if time itself stops. Relief floods your features, and he rushes to your side, gripping your hand as though it’s the only tether keeping him grounded.

"I’m here," he breathes, his voice cracking with emotion, kissing all over your hand. "I’m here, baby."

And as you squeeze his hand, the world narrows to just the two of you. The chaos of the hospital fades into the background, replaced by the steady rhythm of your breathing, the soft murmurs of encouragement from the midwife, and the quiet reassurance that, despite everything, he made it. He’s here.

“Okay, Y/N, I need you to push again for me. You’re doing so great, hun.” The midwife's voice is soft, almost a lullaby amidst the storm of chaos within you. It’s as if her words offer you a momentary anchor, a delicate thread of calm amidst the crashing waves of pressure building up inside your body. You nod, gasping for breath, your entire body trembling with exhaustion, but her voice mixed with the familiar warmth of Jongseong’s hand in yours somehow gives you strength. His fingers, strong and steady, wrap around yours, grounding you in this moment of overwhelming intensity.

He whispers soothing words, his thumb brushing over your clammy skin, wiping the sheen of sweat from your brow. But you barely register them. The noise of the hospital fades into the background as your body screams for release. It’s all-consuming, this pain—a deep, primal ache that makes you wonder how anyone could endure this more than once. You’re making a vow to yourself in this very moment: this is definitely the last time you’ll be giving birth.

The midwife’s calm encouragement pulls you back into the moment. “That’s it, you’re doing brilliantly, sweetie! He’s crowning!”

Her words send a jolt of both fear and anticipation down your spine. He’s almost here. You’re almost at the end. But it hurts - God, it fucking hurts. You can feel your body stretching, tearing, and it feels impossible, like your entire being is being pulled apart at the seams. You wonder how anyone survives this. You wonder how people choose to do this again and again. But the end is so close now, you can feel it, and it’s that thought, that hope, that pushes you to dig deep into a reserve of strength you didn’t even know you had.

Jongseong leans in, his face inches from yours as he wipes the sweat off your forehead. His touch is gentle, careful, as though you might shatter under the intensity of what’s happening. “My beautiful girl, you’re doing so well,” he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. His words are meant to comfort you, but in your overstimulated state, they fall flat, like a pebble tossed into a stormy sea.

"You did this to me!" you cry out, your voice a strangled mixture of rage, exhaustion, and raw pain. The agony, the pressure, the sensation of your body trying to expel a living, breathing being from your core - it’s all too much. The frustration bubbles up and spills out as you glare at him through half-lidded eyes, loathing him, if only for a second, for putting you in this impossible situation.

Jongseong doesn’t take offence. Instead, he chuckles under his breath, a sound almost swallowed by the sheer intensity of the moment. He presses a tender kiss to your knuckles, seemingly immune to the iron grip you’ve got on his hand, your fingers squeezing so tightly it’s a wonder his bones aren’t crushed. “I’m sorry, baby,” he says with a grin, trying to lighten the tension. “I’m a bad man for giving you the best fucks of your life and putting you in this situation, aren’t I?”

Despite the searing pain wracking your body, you manage a weak, breathless laugh. His words, paired with the earnest yet amused look on his face, somehow cut through the fog of agony. For a brief, fleeting moment, the tension in the room eases, and even the nursing team joins in with a soft chuckle, their eyes sparkling with fondness.

“You’re the worst,” you retort, your voice strained, yet the humour dances between you like a fleeting lifeline. You don’t mean it, and once your beautiful baby is in your arms, you’ll forget every resentment towards your husband, the pain long gone and only love clouding your senses.

But the pain comes roaring back in full force, and the midwife’s voice cuts through the moment. “Alright, Y/N, I need you to push again. Just one more big push, okay?”

You nod, though you don’t trust your voice to respond. Your entire body tenses as you prepare for the final stretch, the last hurdle. The pressure builds, an unbearable weight pushing down on you, and with one last groan - deep, guttural, like a battle cry those old vikings used to do - you bear down, gripping Jongseong’s hand with all the strength you have left.

“You’re doing it, Y/N! That’s it, keep going!” The midwife’s voice is urgent but encouraging, guiding you through the overwhelming sensations. The room seems to blur at the edges, your vision tunnelling as you focus on nothing but the task at hand. You feel the burn, the rawness of your body stretching beyond its limits, but you push through it, every fibre of your being screaming for this to be over.

And then, with one final, agonised push, it is.

A high, piercing cry fills the room, cutting through the tension like a blade, and suddenly the world stills. The pain, the fear, the exhaustion - all of it fades away as you hear the first wail of your son, your precious baby boy. You collapse back against the pillows, your chest heaving, tears slipping down your cheeks as the reality of what just happened sinks in.

Jongseong is crying too. His hand is shaking as he wipes his eyes, his gaze locked on the tiny, wriggling figure in the midwife’s arms. “He’s here,” he whispers, his voice breaking with emotion. “Our boy… he’s here.”

The midwife checks your son over for a moment, and once she deems everything is perfectly healthy and fine, she offers you a small smile. “Would you like skin-to-skin?”

Without hesitation, you nod, exhaustion clouding over you. “Yes, please.”

The midwife places your newborn son on your chest, his tiny body warm and wet against your skin. You feel a rush of emotions - love, relief, awe - all of it crashing over you in waves so powerful they steal the breath from your lungs. Jongseong’s hand is reaches up to your face, his fingers trembling as he brushes a tear from your cheek.

“You did it,” he breathes, his eyes shining with pride and wonder. “You really did it, my love.”

You look down at your baby, his small hand curling against your chest, and despite the exhaustion weighing down your limbs, you can’t stop the smile spreading across your face. “We did it,” you whisper, your voice barely audible over the sound of your son’s soft cries.

And in that moment, as the three of you are cocooned in the quiet warmth of the hospital room, the world outside ceases to exist. There is only this. Only the love, the relief, and the overwhelming sense of joy that, despite everything, you’re finally a family.

Bringing life into the world is a moment of pure wonder, filled with a sense of awe and joy that nothing else compares to. The arrival of a new soul, fresh and full of potential, feels like the universe itself holding its breath in reverence. It’s beautiful chaos, tears of relief, the quiet weight of a newborn in your arms, the sweet fatigue that follows the storm of labour. There's a rawness, a vulnerability to it that makes it sacred. The start of life is an unspoken promise, a beginning with endless possibilities stretching out before it.

But as beautiful as the act of bringing life into the world is, it's devastatingly cruel when life is taken away. 

_____

Jongseong ascended the stairs slowly, each step sending a dull ache through his brittle bones. His knees groaned under his weight, no longer the strong, agile legs that had once carried him with ease through the vigours of life. The years had settled deep into his joints, a reminder of a long life lived. At seventy-five, his body had become an archive of memories, each wrinkle and creak a testament to the passage of time. But he didn’t mind, not really. He knew aging was inevitable, and while he wasn’t the fit man he used to be, he had grown accustomed to the slower pace, to the small sacrifices his body demanded. Today, though, his knees seemed to be protesting more than usual.

The morning was still quiet, the kind of peaceful stillness that only early dawn could bring. Jongseong had woken up earlier than you, something he had done a bit more often lately. Your still frame lay blissfully as he slipped out of bed, careful not to wake you. He wanted to surprise you with breakfast in bed, nothing extravagant, just something simple and sweet. Toast, a little bowl of fruit, and your favourite yoghurt arranged neatly on a tray. And, of course, a tiny daisy from the garden, a little burst of yellow and white placed beside the cutlery - a small token of the love he still carried for you, as bright and fresh as the day he’d first met you.

He smiled to himself as he finally reached the top of the stairs, breathing out heavily. His chest rose and fell slowly as he gathered the air back into his lungs, a satisfied chuckle escaping his lips. “Y’know, baby, maybe we should invest in that stairmaster,” he muttered to himself, shaking his head at the thought. “My knees are giving up on me here.”

He pushed open the door to your shared bedroom, the familiar scent of lavender and old wood welcoming him in. The room was a sanctuary, a place where the two of you had spent decades creating a life together. The walls seemed to hum with memories - of laughter, whispered arguments, nights spent comforting a scared baby Jeyou when he was small, his little body tucked between the two of you as you soothed his fears. Even now, the room felt like a cocoon of warmth, filled with the quiet reassurance of a life well-lived together.

Jongseong’s eyes softened as they landed on you. There you were, lying so peacefully, your grey hair splayed across the pillow, half of your face buried into its softness. Your lashes rested delicately on your wrinkled cheeks, and even now, after all these years, you looked so beautiful to him. He’d always loved watching you sleep, loved the way your face relaxed into a soft serenity. He stood there for a moment, tray still in hand, just looking at you, his heart swelling with the same love that had carried him through all the challenges, all the joys and sorrows of life. Every wrinkle on your face told a story he cherished, every line a map of the life you had built together.

But as he stood there, something shifted. The quietness in the room felt...different. The silence was deeper, more still than usual. He tilted his head, waiting for the familiar soft snort you made when you exhaled in your sleep, or for the small rise and fall of your chest that always reassured him. 

But none of that came.

His heart, which had been so full just moments ago, plummeted in his chest. A chill washed over him, the warmth of the room suddenly replaced with a growing panic.

“Love?” His voice was uncertain, his body moving on instinct as he placed the tray down on the dresser by the door. His legs, tired just a second ago, suddenly felt weightless as he rushed to your side. “Y/N?” He sat on the bed, his voice trembling now. “Baby, come on, wake up.”

He reached out, brushing the hair from your face, the strands falling softly between his trembling fingers. His hand lingered on your cheek, feeling for the warmth he had always known, but your skin felt cool beneath his touch. Too cool.

“Y/N,” he whispered, his voice cracking. His other hand found your shoulder, shaking you gently at first, and then with more urgency. “No, no, no. Come on, baby, stop joking around. Wake up. Please.”

The stillness of your body was a stark contrast to the frantic tremor in his hands. He shook you again, harder this time, but you remained as you were - so peaceful, so unbearably still. His chest tightened, the tears pooling in his eyes blurring his vision. He blinked rapidly, as though he could chase away the truth that was slowly sinking in, but it was there, gnawing at the edges of his heart.

“Please, baby, please. Don’t do this. I need you to wake up.” His voice was barely a whisper now, broken and fragile, like a child pleading for a nightmare to end. He pulled you closer, his trembling fingers gripping your arms as he collapsed over you, his body draped across yours as the sobs tore through him. The tears fell freely now, landing on your skin, tiny droplets of his heartbreak mingling with the softness of your stillness.

“I can’t lose you,” he whispered into your hair, his voice strangled by grief. “Please. Don’t leave me. Not now. I’m not ready.”

The room, once so full of love and warmth, felt unbearably cold now. The silence stretched on, suffocating him, pressing down on his chest until he could barely breathe. He held you tightly, his arms wrapped around your lifeless body, as if by sheer will alone he could pull you back, make you breathe again, make your heart beat again. But you didn’t move. You didn’t stir.

Jongseong’s tears soaked into your skin, his sobs shaking his frail frame. His heart felt like it was being ripped apart, every beat more painful than the last. He pressed his cheek against your forehead, inhaling the faint scent of your skin, the scent that had been a constant comfort to him for all these years. But now, even that was fading, slipping away like you had.

“I can’t do this without you,” he cried, his voice breaking as he held you tighter. “We’ve always done everything together. How am I supposed to keep going if you’re not here? Please, baby, please...just come back to me.”

But there was no response, no stirring beneath his touch. Only silence. The kind of silence that comes with finality, with the weight of something precious being stolen away forever.

He stayed there, curled up beside you, his tears flowing unchecked, his heart heavy with the unbearable realisation that the love of his life, the woman who had been his everything for decades, was gone. The weight of it settled into his bones, deeper than any ache he’d felt before. This wasn’t just the weight of age, but of loss - a weight that would never truly lift.

For a long time, Jongseong didn’t move. He stayed wrapped around you, whispering soft apologies, broken words of love, promises that no longer had a future. His tears mingled with the daisy he’d picked for you, now wilting beside the untouched tray on the dresser, a small, fragile symbol of the life that had once bloomed between the two of you.

Jongseong's sobs gradually gave way to a trembling stillness as he lay beside you, his breaths coming in ragged, shuddering gasps. The tears had begun to slow, leaving trails of salt on his cheeks, mingling with the remnants of the breakfast tray that had once held such promise. The quiet of the room felt like a heavy blanket, oppressive and final. It was the kind of silence that seemed to stretch endlessly, a cruel reminder of what was now lost.

He pulled himself up slightly, lifting his head from where it had been buried in your shoulder. His eyes, red and swollen, scanned the room - the room that had been a sanctuary of shared dreams and countless memories. He looked at the framed photographs on the bedside table: the smiling faces of a younger you and him, the family portraits, snapshots of Jeyou through the years. It was all a tapestry of a life lived together, and now, it felt like a cruel joke.

“C’mon, love,” he said, his voice hoarse but resolute. He took your hand in his, holding it gently, trying to draw strength from the familiar warmth that was no longer there. “We still have so much more to do.” His voice cracked, but he pressed on, his mind desperately clinging to the plans they had made, the future they had envisioned.

He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself, his fingers tracing the lines of your hand with a tenderness born of countless shared moments. “Remember, we were going to finish the garden? We talked about planting those roses in the front yard. You always said you wanted to see them bloom better than the witches next door. And the trip to the lake -  Jeyou’s been asking about that fishing trip for ages. You promised him, remember? We were going to take him and Minhee out there and teach them how to catch those big trout.”

Jongseong’s tears began to flow again, mixing with the desperate, pleading edge in his voice. “What about Jeyou?” he continued, his voice breaking. “You can’t leave him behind. We’ve always been a family. He needs you, just like I do. He’s grown up so much, and he still needs his mum. We were going to watch him grown old and brittle like us, how can you do that if you don’t wake up, huh?”

He bent his head, his forehead resting against the cool, unmoving surface of your hand. “Fuck, baby,” he whispered, the words barely audible through the sobs that wracked his body. “If you can’t come back for me, come back for him. Please, please, please. Don’t leave him with just memories of you. He needs you. I need you.”

His pleas hung in the air, a desperate cry to the silence that had become so final. He squeezed your hand, the small, gentle action a futile attempt to make you respond, to bring you back. The room felt impossibly cold now, the warmth of shared dreams replaced by the chilling finality of loss.

He stayed like that for what felt like hours, holding your hand, whispering promises and plans that would never come to pass. The light from the morning sun filtered through the curtains, casting a soft glow over the room, but it seemed to mock him now. The day they had planned, the future they had envisioned together, was slipping away, drowned in the ocean of his grief.

Jongseong’s heart felt like it was breaking into a thousand pieces, each shard a fragment of a life that would never be. He tried to imagine moving forward, but every vision was tainted by your absence. The world outside, with its ongoing rhythm and pulse, felt distant and irrelevant compared to the hollow ache that had settled within him.

_

Jongseong stood by your grave, the ache in his chest so profound it felt like it had hollowed him out completely. He had known, of course, that your funeral would be difficult but nothing, not even the endless condolences and the gentle words from well-meaning friends and family, could have prepared him for this kind of pain. The grief gnawed at him, relentless and unforgiving, leaving him feeling raw and exposed. It was the kind of hurt that no words could soothe, no embrace could soften. Nothing - except you.

His black suit hung loose on his frame, a stark contrast to the confident man he had once been. His posture, usually straight and proud, was slouched, his shoulders weighed down by the unbearable burden of loss. His face, pale and drawn, was a shadow of the man who once carried the light of the world in his heart. That light, he feared, had been taken with you. Since the moment you passed, the world had dimmed, and he wondered if he would ever feel warmth again. When the earth loses the sun, there is only darkness that remains.

He hasn’t slept. How could he? The bed is too big, too cold, too empty without you. Every night since your passing, he had lain awake, staring at the ceiling, his hand reaching across the bed to where you used to be, only to be met with nothing. He would run his fingers over the cool, empty space, the ache in his heart growing stronger with each passing minute. The silence was unbearable, the kind that swallowed him whole. He wondered how he was supposed to go on without you when every reason for his existence was tied to you. You had been his purpose, his love, his everything.

Since he was twenty-two years old, he had known nothing but being your other half. You had been there with him through every step, every joy, every heartbreak, every victory. Now, you weren’t here, and it felt as though half of him had been torn away, leaving a void that nothing could ever fill. His hand felt empty, void of your comforting squeezes, the way you used to reassure him with just a touch. He would never feel that again. He would never hear your laugh, never see your smile light up a room, never feel the warmth of your embrace. The thought was unbearable, a suffocating weight on his chest that made it hard to breathe.

Choking back a sob, Jongseong clenched his jaw and squeezed his throat shut, trying desperately to keep himself together, if not for himself, then for the family who stood around him. He knew they were hurting too, how could they not be, when you had been the centre of their lives as well? But it was hard. It was so hard to stand there and be strong when his insides were crumbling, when every fibre of his being screamed for you. He stared at the ground, his vision blurred by tears, the earth below looking so final, so cold.

The sky overhead was grey, a dull blanket of clouds that seemed to mirror the grief that hung in the air. The wind was gentle, but even the breeze felt like it carried sadness, the chill sinking into Jongseong’s bones. It felt as though the world itself had lost its colour, its vibrancy, ever since you had gone. The trees that surrounded the cemetery stood still, their leaves barely rustling, as if even nature was mourning. Every corner of the graveyard seemed muted, the flowers on the graves dull and lifeless, the headstones stark and lonely. Even the birds seemed quieter today, as though they too understood the magnitude of the loss.

Jongseong forced himself to look up, his eyes finding Jeyou across the gravesite. His son stood beside his wife, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed, his gaze locked on the casket that had been lowered into the ground. Jongseong’s heart ached even more at the sight of him. 

He wanted so desperately to be strong for Jeyou, for your son. He wanted to walk over and put a hand on his shoulder, to tell him everything would be alright, to hold him the way he had when Jeyou was a little boy, scared and unsure of the world. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t be anything for anyone right now, because the one person who had always given him the strength to carry on was gone.

Ara came up beside him then, slipping her arm through his. She didn’t say anything, after all, what could she say? There were no words that could take away the pain. Jongseong felt her presence beside him, her quiet support, but even that couldn’t bridge the gap that had opened up in his heart. Ara’s touch was gentle, her hand squeezing his arm, but the void inside him was too vast, too deep for even the love of his granddaughter to reach.

The priest’s voice droned on in the background, speaking the final words of the burial, but the words seemed to drift away, lost in the weight of the moment. Jongseong could barely hear them over the pounding of his heart, over the sound of his own ragged breaths. He clenched his fists, trying to hold back the sobs that threatened to break free again. He didn’t want to fall apart, not here, not in front of everyone. But how could he not, when the love of his life was leaving him forever?

Jongseong bit his lip, his eyes glassy as he glanced down to your coffin-covered body, as if searching for some kind of reassurance. But there was none to give. This was it. This was the end. You were gone, and there was no miraculous happy ending where you would come back to him, where you would smile and tell him you were never going to leave. There was only the harsh, brutal reality that he would have to live the rest of his life without you.

Jongseong’s knees buckle slightly as the final prayer is spoken, and he feels Ara tighten her grip on his arm, grounding him, keeping him upright. He wants to collapse, to lie beside you and never get up. He wants to close his eyes and pretend that this was all just a terrible dream. But it isn’t. The casket in the ground is real, the earth that will cover it is real, and you are truly gone.

Jongseong let out a shaky breath, the air catching in his throat as he continued to stare at the grave. The casket, now partially covered by the earth, felt like a cruel finality, the last barrier between him and the love of his life. The flowers scattered around the site seemed dull in the overcast light, their once vibrant colours muted by the grief that hung over the cemetery like a thick fog. Everything seemed too quiet, too still, as if the world itself had paused in reverence to the enormity of his pain.

His heart pounded in his chest, each beat echoing with the agony of knowing that this was the end—no more shared mornings, no more gentle touches, no more stolen glances. The weight of it all made his chest tighten, a crushing force that left him gasping for breath. He could hardly believe that this was real, that the woman who had been his reason for living for so many years was now gone, leaving him to navigate a life he no longer knew how to live.

Ara tugged gently at his arm, her silent plea to move, to take a step forward. Jongseong hesitated, his feet rooted to the ground, unwilling to leave the spot where you lay. His eyes remained fixed on the grave, as if by staring hard enough, he could will you back into existence, could bring you back to him. But he knew it was futile. You were gone, and no amount of wishing or hoping could change that.

With a deep, ragged breath, Jongseong finally allowed Ara to lead him away. His feet dragged against the soft ground, every step feeling like a betrayal, a distancing from the life you had shared. Ara’s head stayed resting on his shoulder, her silent support both a comfort and a reminder of the family you had built together. He felt the weight of her love, the warmth of her presence, but it wasn’t the same. It would never be the same without you.

As they moved slowly away from the grave, Jongseong couldn’t resist one last glance back. His eyes, swollen and red from the tears that had yet to stop, locked onto the casket once more, now almost completely covered by the earth. It looked so final, so unbearably permanent. The soft hum of the wind through the trees seemed to carry with it a whisper of the life they had once known, a life that was now out of reach.

The grey sky overhead mirrored the dull ache in his heart, its heavy clouds hanging low as if they, too, mourned the loss of something irreplaceable. The air was thick with the scent of damp earth and fresh flowers, but even that felt too bittersweet, a cruel reminder of the beauty that could still exist in a world where you no longer did.

As Jongseong allowed himself to be guided away, his shoulders hunched under the weight of grief, he knew that a part of him would forever remain at that graveside, buried alongside you. The rest of the world moved on around him, but for Jongseong, time had stopped the moment you left. Each step he took felt like a journey into an unknown future, a future without you by his side.

And as they walked further and further away, the image of your grave growing smaller in the distance, Jongseong couldn’t help but whisper under his breath, a final, desperate plea to the universe. “Wait for me, love…just wait for me.”

His words faded into the wind as Ara squeezed his arm gently, and together, they walked away from the place where his heart now lay, buried with you.

____

"I miss her," he says, his voice trembling slightly, breaking the stillness. It’s not just a simple statement—it’s a confession, raw and unfiltered, the kind that makes his chest ache as though his heart is being twisted by an invisible hand. He can feel the familiar sting of unshed tears burning behind his eyes, but he fights them back.

The living room is quiet again, but the kind of quiet that suffocates rather than soothes. Jongseong sits on the edge of the worn couch, his eyes fixed on the photographs that line the mantle. They are still - frozen moments of a life that once brimmed with joy and love. His mind drifts back to the present after the painful journey through memory, and he sighs, his heart heavy with the weight of a year without you.

The pain, sharp as it is, feels like a key turning inside him, unlocking emotions he thought he had long buried. A year. A whole year without you. Not a single day has passed where he doesn’t think of you. The mornings are the worst, when he still, out of habit, sets out two cups for coffee. He never drinks the second one - it just sits there, untouched, a quiet tribute to your absence. The daytime programmes you loved continue to play on the television, though they bring him no comfort, just the dull hum of voices filling a void. Visiting your grave has become his ritual, the only place where he feels some semblance of peace, though even that is shadowed by the overwhelming loneliness.

Jeyou shifts beside him, his own expression mirroring his father’s grief. He reaches out, gripping Jongseong’s hand with a firm, comforting squeeze. "I can't imagine what this day is like for you, Dad," Jeyou says, his voice soft, heavy with understanding. After all, he lost his mum, the one woman who sacrificed everything for him to attend the best schools, follow his dreams, and always made him feel like he belonged in this horrible world. 

He misses your soothing words, particularly on days like today, when he would give anything for your advice.

Jongseong swallows the lump in his throat, shaking his head slightly. "I only pray that you go first before your partner, so you don’t have to deal with this suffering," he replies, his voice hoarse but sincere. He knows how morbid it must sound, talking so freely about his son’s death, but he means every word. Losing the love of your life is an agony he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, let alone Jeyou. It’s not something you ever get over. The pain is deep, cutthroat, and unrelenting, carving out pieces of your soul until you’re hollowed out, just an echo of who you used to be.

They continue talking for the next few hours, the conversation a gentle distraction, though the sorrow lingers in every pause, every shared glance. Minji and Minhee return from outside, running about the room, their laughter a bright but distant sound in Jongseong’s ears. He watches them, a small smile flickering on his lips. Their energy, their innocence, is a reminder that life does go on, even when it feels like yours has stopped.

As the night begins to peer it’s head, it’s time for them to go. Jongseong hates goodbyes now, even the small ones. Ara looks particularly reluctant to leave, her brow furrowed in worry as she watches her grandfather. She’s always been able to read him like a book, even as a child, and now she can see the light fading from his eyes, just as it has been ever since you left.

"I’ll pop around tomorrow, okay? We’ll get you some shopping in," Jeyou says, standing up and shrugging into his jacket, his eyes lingering on his father’s frail form. Jongseong looks thinner these days, the years catching up to him faster than ever before.

"Thanks, son," Jongseong replies, his voice filled with genuine appreciation. He knows how much of a burden it must be, looking after him, checking in on him. He should be the one taking care of everyone, the way he used to, but these days, it’s hard just to get out of bed in the mornings. The world feels heavier.

Minji and Minhee run up to their Poppy, throwing their arms around him in a tight hug. He leans down, pulling them close, inhaling the sweet scent of their hair as he squeezes them back with as much strength as he can muster.

"Be good, okay? I’ll see you soon," he murmurs, his voice thick with emotion. Minji giggles and gives him one last squeeze before darting off towards the car, while Minhee sighs in compassion for his great grandfather before following his little sister. He doesn’t know the full extent of everything that goes on, but he knows the old man is hurting. 

Jeyou lingers a moment longer, his eyes searching his father’s face. There’s concern there, etched deep into his features. "Look after yourself, Dad. I mean it," he says, his tone firm but filled with love.

Jongseong nods, offering a faint smile, though it doesn’t reach his eyes. "I will," he says quietly, but they both know it’s more of a promise to make Jeyou feel better than a commitment Jongseong truly believes in.

As the door closes behind them, Jongseong stands by the window, watching as the car pulls away, his heart sinking deeper into the loneliness that has become his constant companion. The house, once filled with life and laughter, feels far too quiet now. He turns, his gaze drifting back to the photographs on the mantle - snapshots of a life well-lived, of love shared, of a happiness he fears he will never feel again.

With a sigh, Jongseong walks to the mantle and gently picks up the frame holding your picture. His thumb brushes over the glass, tracing the contours of your face, his chest tightening with the ache of missing you.

‘Look after yourself,’ Jeyou had said. But how could he, when the one person who made life worth living was gone?

As the silence wraps itself around him once more, Jongseong sets the picture back in its place, his heart heavy with the weight of another day without you.

Climbing up the stairs, he makes his way to your bedroom, the day draining him of everything he has left. Jongseong steps into the bedroom, the air feels heavier, thick with memories and the lingering presence of you. The familiar scent of lavender still clings to the room, though it’s faded over time, much like the vibrant colours of the quilt you both once shared. He pauses by the doorframe, his eyes falling instinctively to your side of the bed. It’s exactly as you left it - untouched, sacred. He’s been afraid to disrupt it, afraid that even the slightest disturbance might somehow break the fragile connection he feels with you, like it might shake you wherever you are in the universe.

But tonight is different. Tonight, the ache of missing you is unbearable.

Slowly, Jongseong crosses the room, each step feeling heavier than the last. His heart hammers in his chest, his breath shallow as he reaches the bed. He hesitates for a moment, his trembling fingers reaching out to touch your pillow, the one that still sees your head laying upon. Tears well up in his eyes, blurring his vision, but he doesn’t wipe them away. He lets them fall freely, each drop a testament to the love he’s carried for you all these years, a love that still refuses to fade even in your absence.

With a shaky breath, Jongseong lowers himself onto your side of the bed, feeling the mattress dip under his weight. It feels strange at first, like he’s intruding on a space that should remain untouched, but the yearning to feel close to you again overpowers the guilt. He lies down, resting his head on your pillow, his chest rising and falling with uneven breaths as his tears soak into the fabric.

“I love you, Y/N. More than my heart and chest can hold in,” he whispers into the empty room, the same words he had once said to you all those years ago when he first confessed his love. It feels like an echo, like his heart is trying to reach across the vast distance between him and wherever you are now, hoping that you can hear him, feel him.

He swallows the lump in his throat, his body trembling with grief. "I don’t know how to do this without you, Y/N. Everything... everything is so hard now. Even getting out of bed in the morning. There’s no joy in anything anymore." His voice lowers to a near whisper, almost as though he’s confessing to the universe itself. 

The room feels impossibly quiet, the stillness pressing down on him. His mind races with memories of you, of your laughter, the way your smile could light up even the darkest day, how your hand in his made everything feel right. He presses his face into the pillow, inhaling deeply as if he could somehow capture the last remnants of your presence.

Jongseong closes his eyes, exhaustion creeping up on him, though it’s not the kind that can be cured by sleep. It’s a soul-deep weariness, the kind that comes from carrying too much pain for too long. He hasn’t allowed himself to cry like this in a while, always trying to stay strong for the family, but here, in the silence of your bedroom, he finally lets himself feel the full weight of his grief.

"I'm sorry, love," he whispers, his voice barely audible now. "I don’t know how to live in a world without you. I miss you so much it hurts... I just want to feel you beside me again, even if only for a moment."

He feels the tears slip down his cheeks, hot and unrelenting, but he’s too tired to wipe them away. His body sinks deeper into the bed, the familiar warmth of the blankets enveloping him, though it’s not the same. It’ll never be the same without you.

Jongseong closes his eyes, his hand clutching your pillow as if it were you, as if holding on tight enough could bring you back. The exhaustion weighs heavier on him now, pulling him under, and before he knows it, he’s drifting off to sleep - something that has eluded him since you passed.

Jongseong lies still, his breath slowing as the quiet of the room wraps around him like a blanket. The familiar scent of your pillow soothes the ache in his chest, though not entirely. His hand remains clutching the pillow, his knuckles white against the soft fabric, as if holding on just a little tighter might somehow bring you back.

His frail body begins to relax, the weight of the years and grief easing off his tired shoulders. His eyelids grow heavy, the darkness behind them more inviting than the empty, lonely room. He inhales deeply, filling his lungs with the scent of you; he swears he can feel you surrounding him.

Jongseong’s heart, worn and bruised by your absence, finds a strange calm. The sharp pain of loss that has haunted him for so long softens, as if your presence - though unseen - soothes him, guiding him gently. He can almost hear your voice, soft and familiar, calling his name from somewhere far off, yet so close.

Exhaustion weighs heavier now, pulling him further into that quiet space between sleep and memory. His body sinks deeper into the mattress, the aches in his bones easing as his breathing slows. In the stillness, each breath comes softer, more rhythmic, like the gentle ebb of a distant tide.

As sleep pulls him in fully, a peaceful expression settles across his face. The lines of grief soften, replaced by something close to serenity. His grip on the pillow loosens, his hand falling gently to his side.

And in that stillness, Jongseong rests, his breathing gentle, his heart finally at peace, as though in the silence of the room, he has found his way back to you.

_____

“Dad?” Jeyou’s voice echoes through the house as he steps inside, the door clicking shut softly behind him. A strange, unsettling quiet fills the space, not the kind of silence that welcomes you home but the kind that makes your skin prickle. There’s no familiar sound of his father calling out from another room, no clattering of dishes in the kitchen or the hum of the TV from the living room. It’s still. 

Too still.

He pauses at the base of the stairs, staring up as if expecting his dad to appear at the top, grinning, telling him to come up. But nothing. The quiet presses down on him, growing heavier with each passing second. Everything in the house looks exactly the same as it did yesterday - the framed photos of family lining the hallway, the shoes left in a pile near the door, and the faint scent of yesterday’s lunch lingering. Something feels...off.

Jeyou swallows hard, dread settling in the pit of his stomach as he places his hand on the bannister, fingers trembling slightly. He starts up the stairs slowly, the soft creak of each step the only sound breaking the silence. With every step, his heart pounds harder, his breath growing more unsteady. The house, once full of warmth, now feels cold, unfamiliar.

As he reaches the top of the stairs, the hallway stretches before him, just as it always has. But the air is different. It feels heavier, like it’s holding its breath, waiting for something to happen. Jeyou walks toward the bedroom, his pace quickening as he reaches the door. His hand hovers over the handle, the knot of anxiety twisting tighter in his chest. He pushes the door open slowly.

There, lying on the bed, is his father.

Jongseong is still in the clothes he wore yesterday, his body lying peacefully on the bed, his hand hanging limply off the side, fingers curled and unmoving. His face is calm, serene even, as if he’s just fallen into a deep sleep. But the sight is all wrong. His chest doesn’t rise and fall with the steady rhythm of breath. The colour in his cheeks has faded, his skin now ashen and pale.

Jeyou’s breath catches in his throat, his chest tightening painfully. "Oh... no..." he whispers, the words trembling as they leave his mouth. His jaw clenches, trying to hold back the wave of emotion crashing over him, but it’s no use. His eyes burn, tears pricking painfully at the corners before spilling over, running down his cheeks before he can even bring himself to step closer.

He drops to his knees beside the bed, his hands shaking as they reach for his father’s limp hand, the warmth long gone. His fingers brush Jongseong’s skin, but there’s no response, no twitch, no familiar squeeze. His father is gone, and Jeyou feels the reality of it shattering through him like a blow to the chest.

He leans over the bed, resting his forehead against his father’s hand, the sobs he’s been holding back finally escaping his throat in broken gasps. “No... please... not yet, Dad,” he chokes out, his voice strangled by the tears, the grief clawing at his insides. "Please..."

Jeyou lifts his head, staring at his father’s peaceful face, and for a moment, it feels like he’s just sleeping. But the quiet, the terrible, awful quiet, tells him everything he needs to know. His father, the man who had been his rock, his guide through life, is no longer here.

There is a sweet irony in this moment.

As Jeyou's sobs echo softly through the room, Jongseong’s spirit hovers nearby, watching his son with a tender, bittersweet smile. Although he mourns the pain of his son, there’s no longer any weight on his heart, no sense of loss or longing. Instead, there’s a warmth, a gentle, reassuring presence by his side. He feels it before he even turns. A familiar hand slips into his, fingers intertwining with his in the way they always had, fitting perfectly, like pieces of a long-lost puzzle finally reunited.

He turns, and there you are, standing before him with that radiant smile that never failed to brighten his darkest days. It’s the smile that spoke of every quiet moment you shared, every laugh, every whispered confession of love. His heart, which had carried the unbearable ache of your absence for so long, suddenly feels whole again. The years of sorrow and longing melt away in an instant, replaced by the purest form of joy.

“Took you long enough,” you say with a soft pout, your voice light and teasing, just as it had been in life. There’s no hint of sadness or bitterness in your tone, only the playful warmth he’s missed so much, the kind that had always made his heart flutter.

Jongseong smiles in return, a gentle, peaceful expression settling over his face. For the first time in a year, he feels truly at ease. “I was caught up, sorry, baby,” he replies softly, his voice filled with love as he gazes at you. His hand squeezes yours gently, his fingers brushing over your skin as if to reassure himself that this moment is real, that you’re really here.

And then, without hesitation, he leans in and presses his lips to yours in a kiss so tender, so full of longing and relief, that it feels as though the time apart vanishes in an instant. The kiss is soft yet meaningful, filled with all the words he could never find to express how much he had missed you. It's like coming home - like slipping into the warmth of an embrace that was always meant to be. 

The sensation of your lips against his is more perfect than anything he remembers, as if all the love he ever felt for you has been distilled into this one beautiful moment. The warmth of it spreads through him, igniting his soul with a peace he hasn't felt in a long time.

Jongseong pulls back just enough to look at you, his forehead resting against yours. His soul feeling light yet beautifully full, free from the ache that had weighed him down for so long. He finally feels whole, finally feels like he’s where he belongs - beside you, where he’s always meant to be.

For a moment, he glances over his shoulder, back at Jeyou. His son kneels by the bedside, his shoulders shaking with silent sobs, the pain of his loss fresh and raw. Jongseong watches him with a soft expression, understanding the weight of the grief that will soon settle into Jeyou’s heart. But even in his son’s sorrow, Jongseong knows he will be okay. Time will heal the wounds, and Jeyou has the strength to carry on. He has a family, a loving wife, beautiful children, and the memories of both his parents to guide him.

Jongseong’s lips curve into a sad yet hopeful smile as he watches Jeyou. ‘You’ll be alright, Jeyou' he thinks, though no words leave his lips. He knows Jeyou will heal, just as he himself did once, after his own parents passed. There will be sadness, yes, but there will also be love, laughter, and life to carry him forward.

With that comforting knowledge resting in his heart, Jongseong turns back to you, his grip on your hand tightening just a little, as if to reaffirm the bond you’ve shared for decades. The past, the pain, the loneliness - it all falls away, leaving nothing but peace and love.

“Ready?” you ask softly, your eyes sparkling with a familiar warmth, as if you’d never been apart.

Jongseong nods, a contented smile playing at his lips. “Always,” he replies, his voice steady, filled with a quiet, unwavering certainty. With your hand in his, he takes the first step forward, leaving behind the world of sorrow and stepping into forever with you.

And as the two of you walk together, the light grows brighter, the burdens of the mortal world disappearing entirely, now walking hand in hand, just as you were always meant to.

_____

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PERSPECTIVE

𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬.

SERIES, SMAU, ENEMIES TO LOVERS, MUTUAL FRIENDS, MUTUAL PINING, COMEDY, ANGST, SLOW BURN. MDNI.

contents.

02. MORE.

written part below

sunghoon droops down to lock his phone, walking into the ice rink in the early morning, the dark of dawn seeping out of the coldness of his breath as he plugs in his earpods.

he watches over the ice rink as the music repeats, watching the ghost of his memories play over the ice, his limbs, unforgiving, trying to resist the temptation to skate again.

in the hour of dark, sunghoon wails deeply inside, wishing he had the freedom to choose this career, wishing that-

"you again."

sunghoon flinches, hearing the sound of a new familiar in the space. looking up to see the girl on the opposite side of the bench, she stands in spite of his view. she was in the rink, her skates on a hilt as her staggered breaths manifest against the glass.

"if you're gonna keep watching and not skate along, ill call security."

"if you think i'm a fan, i'm gonna have to disappoint." sunghoon stammers back, crossing his eyebrows. the man stands up, stuffing his earphones into his pockets. before he could leave, the girl skates on par to his footsteps.

"you say you're not a fan, but i've seen your obsessive comments, sunghoon." y/n scoffs. "i've seen you here before, and that jacket--" she points, "thats jungwon's. i'm his friend too."

how bold of you. sunghoon turns to her, tongue poked through his cheek. "so what, i'm not here to watch you like a weirdo. i'm here for my own entertainment." he argues back.

"right, and thats what makes you a weirdo." y/n fights back, skating away, "if you're not going to skate, get out."

"i can't. i have no skates on me." sunghoon prevails, "and if i did, why would i spend my time watching you do a bad axel."

"excuse me?" y/n breaks the ice with the blades, stopping as she fastens her pace to face him, "what do you know about axels? hm?" she flaunts, "did that under 18 championship get to your head?" to which sunghoon bursts, laughing at her response.

"oh? sorry, i thought you said i was the fan here." he chuckles, making y/n frustrated by the this man's retorted behaviour towards her. it's not like they knew each other well, so why are they going lengths to fight over themselves?

"yes you are! and you will never be in my place."

those last words riled up sunghoon so bad, he chucked his earphones and open bag to the side with the same familiar that were scattered along with it. y/n couldn't tell, but she realised all along he was wearing them, she was played.

opening the gates from the bench came in the black clothed sunghoon, slender and lean, his limbs urging to rush forward towards y/n and show it how its done. sunghoon reaches up to her, brows furrowed at hers. "alright then, show me how you think its done, and ill show you mine."

the two continued to spar non verbally, trying to up one of their performances, and eventually they share notes, improvements, critique and most of all- nasty remarks. "your form is ass." y/n sighs, to which sunghoon would reply, "tell me how you placed 3rd when you couldve been first." the two continuously played at the game of shitty critique until sunghoon snapped.

"this isn't right." he huffs, looking at the early sun peak through through one of the roof blades. "no.. no this isn't right." he repeats.

"i should be studying for my law unit. this isn't what i should be-" "yo chill-" y/n tries to silence out his worries.

"shut the fuck up." he spits, to which y/n blinks in surprise. she scoffs, thinking that sunghoon and her would be good friends by now, but her views towards him stay.

"this isn't right." he repeats, skating back to the edge, before opening the bars to let him out. y/n catches up to him, giving him another word before he leaves- this time , leaving her to reflect.

"told you, the ice was crispy at this time." she huffs, blocking out the weird interaction she had just firstly faced with sunghoon. "to think that i was gonna see him at the party first." she laughed bitterly.

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PERSPECTIVE

𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬.

SERIES, SMAU, ENEMIES? MUTUAL FRIENDS, MUTUAL PINING, COMEDY, ANGST, SLOW BURN. MDNI.

contents.

03. YEAH, AND?

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PERSPECTIVE

𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬.

SERIES, SMAU, ENEMIES ??TO LOVERS, MUTUAL FRIENDS, MUTUAL PINING, COMEDY, ANGST, SLOW BURN. MDNI.

contents.

06. LATE!

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PERSPECTIVE

𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘬𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘬.

SERIES, SMAU, ENEMIES ??TO LOVERS, MUTUAL FRIENDS, MUTUAL PINING, COMEDY, ANGST, SLOW BURN. MDNI.

contents.

07. RIGHT..

______________________________________________________________

written part below!

"here's my phone." y/n gestures her phone to sunghoon who catches his breath on the bench, wiping the beads of sweat and ice droppings on his neck.

"so you want me to take the whole routine?" he mumbles, followed by a grunt from y/n. "i mean, of course? how else can i see how good i got?" her voice echoes along the walls. the night is still bare and the morning sun hasn't peaked through, the sound of the ice being split and spun on where louder than their breaths- and the two remained at a grudge with each other; both with an equal grounding to the sport.

"alright whatever. whats the song you're going to play your free to?" he asks, going on his phone as he connects it to the girls pink mini speaker with stickers all over.

"don't judge me, but its called enemies to lovers by joshua kyan aalampour." she says, skating as she faces away from him.

he lowly chuckles, a smile cornering his lips, "classical? thats better than some song genres these days."

"whatever just play it, please." y/n turns, looking at the skates on her feet- waiting for the music to play.

sunghoon presses record on her phone as he lets the music start, watching her instantly snap into focus.

right foot, swing- yes. hook- yes, balance? perfect. sunghoon mentally took note of every move she made until he realised how much her demeanour had changed when the music started.

has she always been this good? he watches her, a good minute in and she's landed every move, every curve she made it was crisp, clean- her hair was in the way and yet with a breeze it all worked out.

sunghoon found himself watching her, truly, for the first time without a single ounce of criticism on his mind, and he found himself seeing just how good she really is. her expression ruled out her dance, and her fluidity, like no other. the y/n he faced before was nothing like this skater in front of him now.

"she's.. perfect."

as she glided upon the outer skirts of the rink, the sun decided to kiss her, and he found himself looking at her restless face. she then swiftly lands upon her jumps with her eyes landing on his.

flustered by the intimacy, y/n slips. causing her to knock out of it- but to no prevail, she regains it all, finishing til the end.

"how was it?" she heaves, running out to splat down the bench near him, as he chucks the phone on her lap. sunghoon had seen enough of what he saw, and he can't deny how much he liked it.

"i don't know, see for yourself." he says, packing his things, unable to look her in the eyes this time.

"no critique this time?"

"you don't need me here, that's for sure." he mumbles, mere feet away from the door.

"yeah right." she plays along, before realising he had already left. "park sunghoon?" she yells, before huffing back into her seat. as she pulls out her phone watching through the clips, she hears the mumbling of his voice upon the mic.

"she's.. perfect."

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tags: @istglevi-gotmesimping