Church Boy-Enough

Church Boy-Enough

TW

We arrived home and my father began to smile. I knew what was going to happen, so I ran up to my room and locked the door behind me. My father was now right outside, banging so the door rattled. 

"Open this fucking door!" he screamed, jiggling the handle and banging some more. "Please! Don't!" I cried, hugging my knees to my chest. The banging and yelling stopped. "Travis, please open this door." he kindly requested, stifled anger surging through his voice. "No! I'm not falling for that! Leave! Kick me out, even! I don't care!" I screamed, voice wavering and shaky. "Then leave."

A few minutes later, a loud cracking sound could be heard from right next to me. The door had been split through the center, a large ax through the cheap wood. "You-" I muttered, seeing my father standing there, body shaking. 

"Please..." I whispered, watching as my father charge toward me and knocked me to the ground. He took his hand and balled it into a fist, striking my face as I did my best to cover it. He grabbed my chin and forced me to face him. 

His green eyes shot through me as he slapped me across the face. He then used his other hand to slam my head into the ground. I screamed but he covered my mouth. "You make another sound," he whispered, lowering himself to say it into my ear. "I'll break your jaw..."

A shiver went through my body, and I felt blood gushing from my nose. His hand was on my forehead, forcing my head down, and the other one was by his side and clenched. He raised his fist and struck my eye; a deep bruise would be there soon...

I could barely see now, only out of one eye. He smeared the blood from my nose all over my face, slapping me as he did. "I wish you were never fucking born!" he screamed, spit flying out of his mouth as he yelled. " So do I!" I boldly retorted, letting the pained tears fall from my face. 

He sat up and removed his belt, quickly smacking my torso with it multiple times. He stood up after even more hits, beginning to kick my body as I curled up to protect what I could. "You pussy." he hissed, kicking me so I rolled onto my side. Stomping a foot into my guts, he spat onto my face before leaving. 

I gasped for air as I lie there, shaky and bloody...

It's time to leave...

I tried to sit up but before I could, he was back in my room with a knife. He got on his knees and flipped me effortlessly onto my back. cutting the back of my shirt and exposing my scarred skin. Slowly but violently, he traced the blade down my back, breaking the skin and causing crimson blood to spill out. 

I writhed but to no avail. "The more you squirm, the more I'll hurt you." he threatened, not once removing the cold blade. I knew he was drawing something; I just couldn't figure out what. 

Eventually, he lifted the blade and got off the floor. I felt blood seeping off the sides of my body, contrasting with the cold of the wooden floor, the warm liquid pooled around me. 

I felt dizzy as my father laughed and left, closing the door behind him. "Fuck..." I muttered, putting my hand on my back to evaluate the damage. 

Before I closed my eyes, I could hear screams and gunshots emanating from the rooms beyond mine. "I found him!" a boy shouted, though I couldn't figure out who. "Where?" a woman's voice frantically asked. "Oh my..." she muttered, gasping. "Hurry! He's alive!" he yelled. 

Soon, I felt someone lifting me and putting me on another flat surface. Drifting in and out of consciousness, I heard more people talking and crying.

Sal's POV: 

Ms. Gibson and I broke it, she had brought her gun and wasn't afraid to use it. 

We heard screaming from outside, and even worse, we heard silence right after. We busted in, running into the blonde man who had been at my home. He had blood dripping from his clothes and off of the knife he was holding.

He swung at me, hitting a spot in my arm. Ms. Gibson pulled out her gun and shot him in the arm, causing him to drop the knife. He screamed and I ran up the steps to see if I could find Travis. "I found him!" I yelled, taking a step as I looked at the bloody boy in front of me.

The back of his shirt had been sliced open and his olive skin was exposed. He was bleeding and had the word "Sinner" carved into his back along with a pentagram. "Where?!" Ms. Gibson yelled, following suit. "Oh my..." she muttered, gasping for air.

I picked him up and he nodded in and out of consciousness. We called the ambulance and they arrived quickly. Once they were here, Ms. Gibson and I carried him down and placed him on the stretcher. 

He muttered something that I couldn't have made out if I tried. The paramedics sat with him while one of them cleaned my wounds separately. Once they were finished with me, they went and tended to Travis. 

*Time Skip*

We arrived at the hospital, and they wheeled him out. Once we were inside, they brought him to a room and allowed us to see him after a few hours. I didn't leave the waiting room, not once. 

Ms. Gibson went home as I sat there by myself, sobbing and wishing I could've been there sooner. Wishing I could've said something to save him. 

Wishing I would've never loved him.  

Wishing I could've had some control and stayed away.  

Wishing I never became his friend.

 Wishing I could take back everything I'd ever done.

 Wishing...

 Wishing is never enough...

Hoping he would be okay...

Hoping he'd forgive me...

Hoping he didn't love me...

Hoping that he'd recover... 

Hoping is never enough...

Originally posted March 30th 2023

"Church Boy." - Enough - Wattpad

Church Boy-Gift

Today was Christmas. I woke up early, around 4, and sat everything up. Despite being Christian, Travis was never allowed to celebrate Christmas. His father said it was because he was bad and didn't deserve gifts. So, I wanted this to be something he never forgot.

I wrapped his presents in white wrapping paper with glittery silver wrapping paper. The tree was hauled out of the box and decorated by me and Travis. I had to wake him up. I let him go back to sleep after we were done. He was excited to finally be decorating a tree.

He fell onto the couch and started snoring as his hand fell to the floor. I crawled over and pecked him on his head, playing with strands of hair as he slept. 

*Time Skip*

I finished with the tree and presents. Now, it's time for food and cards. I wrote down each of my friends' names and checked them off as I made their cards. Once I finished the cards, I prepared some food. 

(I'll let you insert whatever, mainly because I can't be bothered to write it, but also because some people have preferences.)

"Done!" I said, taking off the apron and putting away the stuff I used. The time struck seven and I decided it was time for them to get up. 

I walked into my dad's room and shook him vigorously. "Up! Up!" I yelled, watching as he writhed in fear. "Ha, it's Christmas. Let's go." I said, dragging him to the living room. Now, I had to wake Travis up.

I got down on my knees and gently shook him. "Dear, it's Christmas. Time to get up." I whispered, rubbing his back. "You're so bipolar..." my dad remarked, watching in awe as I gently stroked his back and talked to him with a sweet voice. "No..." I objected, not wanting to startle Travis. 

He sat up and looked at the tree. Tears welled in his eyes as he looked at what my father and I had gotten him. "Why..." he muttered, falling into my arms. "Travis, we did this cause we love you. Open them..." I instructed, leading him over to the tree. 

I watched as he tore open the presents like a kid. My dad pulled out his phone and started recording like he did when I was younger. "You bought me clothes!" he exclaimed, wrapping his hands around me. "Well, yea? And some other stuff. The food is getting cold so hurry." I said, pecking his cheek. "Stop. No PDA." my dad joked, fake gagging. "Oh, whatever. You and Lisa should take that advice." I retorted. 

My father smiled and his face turned red. "Speaking of, I'll be right back." he said, excusing himself from the room. He returned after Travis had finished opening his gifts.

We had gotten him some clothes, books, jewelry, and the matching sets. I put mine on and latched his for him. He slid on the ring and looked at it. "I love you, Sal..." he said, not caring my dad was here. "I love you too, Travis." I replied, supping his face and rubbing his cheek with my thumb.

A knock at the door startled us all. My father answered it, Lisa and Larry walked in with gifts as well. "Here, Sal." Larry said, tossing me a gift bag. "Thanks, yours is the green one in the kitchen." I said, pointing to the table in the other room. 

He nodded and walked, the sound of wrapping paper following his entry. He walked back in a second later and sat down on the floor with the rest of us. Lisa handed me a blue-wrapped box and Travis a pink one. "Sorry, I didn't know what you liked so-" 

Lisa was cut off by Travis' excited gasps. "You got me a dog stuffed animal!?" he exclaimed, hugging it to his chest. "Never mind, then." she said, satisfied with her purchase. I opened mine and was just as happy. It was a set of guitar picks, hand decorated with rhinestones and little pictures that Larry had painted. "Hope you like em', man. I know you said you lost yours." Larry chimed in, beginning to tear the wrapping paper off of his own gift. 

His eyes went wide, and he smiled. "You didn't bro...." he whispered, nudging my arm. " I did, bro." I retorted, puffing my chest. "Dude! I've been wanting these for like a year! And new drumsticks? Holy-" he stopped talking at the perfect moment. "Holy crap..." he corrected. 

Lisa eyed him something vicious before smiling as my father wrapped his arm around her. "Travis, I think I remember you saying you'd let me see what you wrote on Christmas. Did you not?" I jeered, reminding him of the promise he'd made. "I did say that. Be right back..." he muttered nervously, walking to my room and grabbing a book. 

"I'll give this to you on one condition,"

"Okay."

"So, you agree?"

"Yup. I trust you."

"Alright..."

"..."

"You can only read it when..."

"When?"

"When we're engaged."

"Douche."

"Your douche, though."

"Yea, I know."

"Good."

Originally posted April 2nd 2023 on Wattpad

"Church Boy." - Gift - Wattpad

Church Boy-Hurt

Once she let go, I stood at my full height and looked at her. She was about four inches taller than Sal. So, around my height. She kept a straight and serious face throughout our entire interaction. I nearly lost my shit and started sobbing again. I couldn't let her see me do that again. 

"Travis, you have to sort this one out by yourself. You can come back tomorrow." She said, flicking the ash off her cigarette into a black resin ashtray. "Okay..." I muttered, rolling down my sleeves and holding my hands. "Goodbye..." she said, walking me to the door. "What?" I said. "See you later..." she corrected. 

"See you later..." I replied walking back down to the elevator and using the keycard Sal gave me to get back down. Once it stopped, I got out and walked back into Larry's apartment. A woman was on the couch and watching TV with another man. He had the same-colored hair as Sal, eyes too. The woman was a spitting image of Larry. Guess this was their parents?

"Who are you?" the woman asked, moving closer to the blue-haired man. "I'm Travis, Sal and Larry's friend. I was just here, I left to go on a walk." I said. "Oh, they're in the treehouse." the man said, putting his arm around the brunette. "Where?" I ask, not having any previous knowledge of the so-called 'treehouse'. 

"Just leave through the door in the back of Lar's room. You'll see it." she said. "Oh, ok..." I said, walking towards Larry's room. "Oh, honey, I'm Lisa, by the way. This is Henry." Lisa said, giving me a warm smile. "Oh, ok. Well, thank you. See you around." I said, waving goodbye as I entered his room and closed the door. 

I walked to the door I hadn't noticed before and gently pushed it open. The cold air hit my face as I exited the complex. I looked up and saw a tall oak with a wooden house settled in its branches at the very top.  

There were a few dozen steps leading to the top, I climbed each one slowly, scared I was going to fall and bust my head open. I reached the top and heard some voices. Sal and Larry's voices, to be specific. It was odd. Usually, Sal's voice was muffled and quiet. This time, it was clear and louder. I listened before actually letting my presence be known.

"Larry, I feel bad."

"Why? He's a dick."

"Because! There has to be a reason."

"No, there doesn't. Some people are just assholes."

"Well, Travis doesn't seem like that type. I just...maybe he has a bad home life, y'know? Something..."

"Maybe, I dunno. I don't really care, to be honest."

"So you've said."

"And I'll say it again."

"Please, don't..."

"Whatever..."

"But seriously, I just want to be friends with him."

"Sal, you can't befriend everyone. You know that, right?"

"Yea, I know."

"Then why do you keep trying?"

"I just...there's something about him...he's so...mysterious? I don't know how to word it."

"Whatever, man. Maybe he'll warm up to you, doubt it, though."

"I hope so...I really do..."

I decided it was time to enter, since they had gone silent. I climbed up and looked right in front of me. My heart sank and I felt my face get hot as ever. Sal didn't have his mask on. His nose was barely existent, his lips were scarred, and little white lines and big ones too, covered his face. I could see some of his teeth from a hole in his cheek. His baby-blue eyes widened when he saw me looking. 

"Travis! Look away! Now!" he screamed, scrambling over to his mask that was laying on the floor. I adverted my eyes and tried my best to stifle a smile. I heard the sound of buckling and waited until I was told to look back up. "Alright..." Sal muttered. I looked back up and he was huddled up to himself. "Sorry...I'm sorry you had to see that..." he said, closing his eyes and putting his head to his knees. "It's..." I started, but stopped quickly, not being able to find my words. 

Quiet sobs came from the blue-haired boy as the greasy one stared at me with contempt and loathing. "What?" I aggressively ask, directing my attention to Larry. "I ought to push you down right now. That's up to Sal, though." he answered, glancing at the sobbing boy. "No! Stop it, both of you!" he yelled, through sobs and hiccups. "I didn't do anything!" Larry yelled back. "You're an ass to him! We just talked about this!" Sal yelled. "Sorry, me and him issues!" Larry said, leaning into his beanbag chair a little more. 

Sal stopped yelling and stopped crying too. He stood up and walked over to me. "Move." he demanded. "Or I'll fucking make you." he threatened. I did as he said and stepped to the side, allowing him access to the exit. He climbed down quickly, not even looking back up or uttering a word. 

"The fuck was that all about?" Larry asked. I just shrugged my shoulders in response, having absolutely no clue what the hell to say or do. "I'll bet he's going back to his room. Let's go back to mine, we can check on him in a few." Larry said, getting up and waking to the exit. "Okay?" I said, surprised at his sudden kindness. Maybe he was just being nice because Sal wanted him to. 

When we got back into his room, he sat down on a stool near an easel and pulled out some art supplies. "You paint or anythin'?" Larry asked, putting his hair into a messy bun and an apron over his clothes. "Sometimes..." I answered, plopping down on the floor. 

"Cool, wanna paint, then?" he asked, holding out a paintbrush. "Um, sure..." I said, walking over and grabbing a small canvas from his drawer. "What are gonna paint?" He asked, putting the tip of his brush in a beautiful shade of blue. It reminded me of Sal.

He has ruined it for me.

He ruined the color blue for me. 

Now every time there's a cloudless sky, crystal blue water, a sapphire stone, a morning glory flower, summer azure butterflies, and even the sweetest candy.

All of it, ruined for me. He's always in my mind. I can't get him out...

I wish I could. 

It's too big a burden to bear. 

(Originally posted March 19th 2023 on Wattpad)

"Church Boy." - Hurt - Wattpad

Church Boy-Treat

Today was Halloween. We all met at Larry's and got dressed. 

*Time Skip*

It was 7 when we walked to the neighborhood. Travis was by my side and everyone was with their boyfriend or girlfriend. It was cool because Larry and Ash had finally gotten together. He'd asked her out a few days prior.

"You ready, Trav?" I ask, nudging his arm. "Guess so, what do I do?" he asked, shrugging. "Go and knock then say 'Trick or Treat'" I explained, pushing him forward towards the first house. he knocked and looked back at me nervously. The door opened and an old woman stepped out with a bowl of candy. I saw Travis say something and open his bag. She dug into her bowl and dropped a few pieces. 

Once she went back in, he ran over to me with the biggest smile I'd ever seen him have. "Fun?" I ask as he aggressively nods his head. We walked to the next house with the group always one or two houses behind us. 

After around 30 minutes, Travis stopped and pulled a random candy from his bag. He pulled out a Battle Head (Warhead) and popped it into his mouth. His eyes went wide and he spits it out almost immediately. "The fuck?!" he yelled, looking at the wrapper. I was trying so hard not o laugh my cheeks were hurting. 

"Gross..." he spat, continuing to walk the neighborhood. 

*Time Skip* (I'm not gonna do a lot for actual Trick or Treating since it's just walking around and knocking on doors.)

We got back to the apartments. Everyone was spent and tired. "You guys wanna trade?" Ash asked, dumping her bag onto the floor. Travis nodded and quickly sat down across from her. "You can have my Battle Heads for...those Sour Patch Children." he offered. "Deal!" Ash shouted, shoving her candies towards him as he gave his to her. 

I sat down next to Travis and gave him most of my dark chocolates for kisses. It was a fair trade, to me. He gave me some milk chocolate in return, just to compensate for the lack of material. Larry and the rest of the group eventually sat down and started trading. 

Maple and Chug traded for chocolate and sour. Travis and I traded for sweet, sour, and the different types of chocolates we had. Todd and Neil didn't trade, instead, they just shared, and Lisa gave us the remaining candy she couldn't give out. 

*Time Skip*

After everybody had traded, we decided to play a few games and watch a movie. We voted and the first game was Twister. Larry would call out the moves and Travis, Ash, and I had to move. Nobody else wanted to play; they were too busy gawking over their partners.

"Travis, right foot, red!" Larry yelled. Travis moved his foot to the nearest red dot. "Sal, left hand, blue!" he yelled. I moved my hand to the nearest blue dot. "Ash, right leg, green." she moved to the nearest green dot. 

Eventually, it was getting hard to move. Travis was on all fours, doing something similar to a bridge. I was practically doing the splits and Ash was sitting like a weird bearskin rug. Larry was choking in the corner, trying to catch his breath through boyish giggles and hiccups.

"You done?" I ask, walking over to Larry because Travis had fallen, and the game was over. "I- yea. I'm done-" he answered, wiping under his eyes. "Good, what next?" Travis asked, walking over and rubbing his back. "We could play Uno?" I suggested, pulling out a shoebox with a few card games. "Sure." Larry agreed, shrugging. 

"Yea, why not!"

"Whatever."

We all gathered in a circle and waited for Ash to shuffle the deck. Once she did, she dealt the cards and told Larry to go first. (This boutta be an actual Uno game, by the way.)

L: Blue 3

A: Blue 2

T: Red 2

S: Red 6

L: Green 6

A: Yellow 6

T: Yellow 4

S: Yellow 1

L: Blue 1

A: Skip card, blue 6

T: Can't play

S: red 6

L: Red 5

A: Plus four-Green-Uno

T: Draws

S: Green 7

L: Green 2

A: Green 1-Uno out.

"Uno out! I win!" Ash exclaimed, recollecting the cards and putting them away. "Of course, you always win." Larry remarked, jokingly rolling his eyes. "It's fine, you love me." Ash joked, poking fun at Larry's very loving and sweet and kind nature, which he most definitely has...

"Movie time?" Maple called out, interlocking her fingers with Chug's. "Sure, you guys all staying?" Larry asked, getting down some blankets from under his bed. "Dude, what the fuck?! How much shit is under your damn bed?!" Travis asked, watching in awe and Larry pulled out around 5 fluffy blankets. "Uhm...Oh! I have a body, a few pillows, my old stuffed animals, a shoebox with human fingers, art stuff, etcetera, etcetera." he joked, counting on his fingers. "That's your best friend..." Travis mocked, giving me a disapproving look. "Yup!" I owned up.

"You poor homosexual boy...I'll pray for you." Travis joked, getting into a praying position. "Y'know, I think I like when you're on your knees. Save that for later." I joked, saying it loud so the group could hear. 

Travis' face got red, but he smiled through the embarrassment. "Shut up..." he muttered, sitting back and crossing his legs loosely. "Horror, comedy, thriller, romance, chick flick, or Romcom?" Larry asked, laying down a bunch of movies in front of us. "Romcom!" Ash and I yelled. 

Travis looked at me with pure shock. "You're so fucking gay." he teased. "Says you!" I retorted, chucking a pillow at his head. "You dickhead!" he shouted, grabbing the pillow I threw at him and launching it towards me. "Oh?! You wanna go, Christian boy?!" I yelled, standing up. "Yea! You wanna go, midget?!" he responded, mimicking my action and standing up as well. 

We stared angrily at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter and falling to the floor. "You looked so dumb!" I joked, wheezing and trying to catch my breath. "Shut up, I have to look down for eye contact!" he insulted, letting out his hyena laugh that I loved. 

I caught my breath and crawled over to the still-giggling boy. "I love you." I whispered. "I love you too." he replied, not bothering to whisper. "Aww~" Larry lovingly called out. "Stop, I hate it~" he finished, executing the transition from swooned to annoyed. "Jealous." I mocked. "I have a girlfriend, ass-fuck." Larry retorted. "Speaking of ass-fuck, how are you, Todd?" he asked, looking at the annoyed couple.

"Fuck you." Todd remarked, raising his middle finger. "What? Not my fault you're an obvious bottom!" Larry defended. "No, I'm not!" Todd objected, earning a giggle from his boyfriend. Neil looked over at Larry and nodded, making sure Todd didn't see. Larry saw and giggled to himself.

"I'm going back to my apartment. Trav, you coming?" I asked, standing up. "Yea, see you guys!" Travis called, waving goodbye as I grabbed his hand and walked with him.

"Tonight was fun." he commented, still walking with me. "Yea, every year we get to do it again."

"Every year?"

"Yup."

"Fun."

Originally posted March 25th 2023 on Wattpad

"Church Boy." - Treat - Wattpad

Church Boy-War

He smirked at me and then started facing the TV, trying to play off what he was going to do. Slowly, he reached his hand over and tugged on my hair. I let out a whimper of pain and delight. My father turned to me, eyebrow cocked and still chewing. "You alright?" he asked, eying me. 

"Yea. Just choked on some food." I said, waving my hand to brush it off. He nodded and turned back to the TV. I looked over at Travis who was avoiding my gaze, stifling a laugh as his face turned red. I licked my finger and stuck it in his ear, earning a face of discomfort and disgust. 

"Hey, Trav, you okay?" I innocently asked. "Mhm..." he murmured. My father looked over at him, confused. "So, what have you boys been up to?" he knowingly asked. "Oh, uhm, nothing. Just, playing games and stuff." Travis answered, also picking up the tone of my father's voice. "That all?" he asked, turning to me. "Yea, pretty much." 

"Mhm, well...I need to be off to bed. Remember, you guys have school. It's 11 PM; get some sleep." father said, putting his dish in the sink and going to bed. "Okay, dad. We will." I promised. "Love you, dad." I called, finishing my food and putting my dish in the sink as well. "Love you too." he responded, closing his door. 

Travis finished too and we went to bed. He crawled next to me and placed me near his stomach. We were spooning. His hands were resting on my stomach and clutching one of mine. "Goodnight, I love you." he whispered, leaving a small kiss on the crook of my neck. "I love you too."

Originally posted March 24th 2023

"Church Boy." - War - Wattpad

Church Boy-RegretsTW

TW

Then I saw them.

The metallic, shiny razors. I know I shouldn't, but I wanted to see it. I picked up the razor from the corner of the sink and put it to my wrist. Before I moved it any closer, I locked the door and then immediately put my hand back over the sink. 

I glided the razor over my skin, watching as it broke, and the crimson-colored regret started flowing out. "Sinners deserve this." I tell myself, hoping that eventually I'll believe it, so this won't feel bad anymore. 

My blood seeped down my hand and coated the porcelain sink. I smiled as the tears streamed down my face and into the sink as well.

They always told me blood was thicker than water. 

Now, I can't tell as they mix together.

After I finished and I couldn't see the lines from previous episodes because they had been replaced with new ones, I left. Rolling down my sleeves, I walked back into the room with Sal and Larry. "I'm going to see Cassie." I informed. "Who?" Larry asked. "Gibson." I muttered. "You okay, Trav?" Sal asked. "Don't call me that." 

"Sorry."

"Shut the fuck up."

*Time Skip*

I walked to Ms. Gibson's room and knocked quietly. After a second, the door creaked open and there she was. "Travis? What happened, kid? Your daddy been beatin' you again?" she asked, her southern accent heavy and thick. 

(Ms. Gibson's name is gonna be Cassie)

"Sometimes. That's not what this is about, though."

"What happened?"

"I did it again."

"Oh fuck."

"..."

"Come in."

"Okay..."

I walked in and she lit up a cigarette. "Let me see," she demanded. "What?" I ask. "The cuts, let me see." she repeated. I lifted my sleeves and moved my arm to where she could see. She sighed deeply and started. "Why?" she asked, running her fingers over the marks. "I... don't know..." I lied. "Another episode?" she asked. I nodded, silently holding back tears. "Your father...is a sick man..." she commented, grimacing and tightening the grip on my forearm. "I know..." I agreed, letting the tears fall.

She let go of my wrists and pulled me into a hug. She smelled of cigarettes, cheap perfume, and booze. I wasn't used to it. When I was younger, she and my mother were very close. She knew of my father's discipline but never approved. 

I don't get why. Of course, his discipline against mother often made her bleed, but she would always say she would get better. Every time, that's what she said. And, every time, father would hit her until she was on the floor and bloody. 

Often, she would take me with her to Ms. Gibson's apartment. She would stay there until morning and then would drive me to school. One day, she drove me to school and when I got home, she wasn't there. My father said she left and wasn't coming back. 

I was hurt. 

Now, I hated her. She left me and didn't take me with her. She fucking left. No note. No goodbye. That morning, she had sat with me and before she let me out of the car at school, she took her cross and put it around my neck.

*10 years ago*

"Come on, sweetheart." my mother called, grabbing a napkin and walking to the other side of the kitchen, over to me. "Almost done!" I replied, hurriedly trying to finish chewing my breakfast. My mother bent down and wiped the corners of my mouth, smiling gently. 

"Let's go, we don't want to be late, do we?" she asked. I shook my head, still chewing. I quickly finished my food and walked my plate over to the dishwasher, loading it in. My mother scooped me up into her arms and peppered me with kisses all over my face. I giggled as it tickled me. 

"Come on, sweetheart." she said, carrying me to the living room. My mother sat me down and slung my backpack over her shoulder. I looked up at her, her brown hair was straight and silky. Her eyes were green and vibrant, contrasting with her tanned skin. 

"Thanks, Cassie." my mother said, hugging her friend. "Thank you, Ms. Gibson!" I chimed in, smiling. "Of course, Dana." Ms. Gibson responded, pulling away and ruffling my hair. "We better get going, I'll miss you." my mother said, her smile shrinking just the slightest. 

"I'll miss you, too. Is it necessary? I..."

"Yes, Cassie. It is. I can't do it anymore."

"I know."

"..."

"..."

My mother grabbed hold of my hand, gently guiding me to the door. "This isn't goodbye, Cass. It's see you later." my mother said, closing the door behind her as we exited the apartment. "Mommy, what's the difference?" I asked, yanking her arm to grab her attention. "You'll understand when you're older." she answered, monotonous and deadpan. 

I was curious but decided not to ask again. She already gave me an answer. As we loaded into the car, she put my backpack on the passenger floorboard as she buckled me in. 

*Time skip*

The ride was silent and awkward. We created an unspoken tension between us. I remember seeing a few tears fall and her quickly wipe them away. When we arrived, I unbuckled and she handed me my bag. I opened the door and tried to get out but she grabbed my arm. "Travis," she said. 

It caught me off guard. She never called me by name. I didn't like it. I felt like I was trouble. "Yea?" I ask, closing my door. "I want to give this to you." she said, sliding off her cross and holding out her other hand. I did the same and she gently placed it on my hand, curling my fingers around it as the chain fell loosely from my grasp.

"You're giving me this? I thought..." I said, confused and nervous. "Yes, Travis, I am." she said, letting go. "Now, have a good day at school." she said, kissing my forehead and smiling softly so her lips quivered. "Remember baby, it's not goodbye," she stopped.

"it's see you later."

(originally posted March 18th 2023 on Wattpad)

"Church Boy." - Regrets - Wattpad