soahbee

What are we?

R💕welcome to my shitty diary, be carefulI adult student I

314 posts

Dear Diary - I Love Him.

Dear diary - I love him.

R's birthday was this month. Yes, I didn't write about it, honestly because I didn't know what to do. I didn't buy him anything, I couldn't think of anything. I feel a little guilty for not being able to express my gratitude and love to him somehow. >< I've made it a point to try to approach him carefully this semester so there aren't any problems. Am I doing it right? I don't know. Will this be progress? I don't know. However, I didn't leave him without a word, I went up to him at school and said with a big smile, "Happy Birthday!" And he just looked down at me with a cute smile, then caressed my face and said "Thank you dear". He actually gave me a present that day, not me. He caressed my face and my heart was not beating properly.

More Posts from Soahbee

soahbee

1 year ago

I want to get closer to him, flirt with him more, push his boundaries.

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soahbee

1 year ago

I'm sorry that I don't bore you more often with my posts, I'm just a typical girl who dies because of the heat and got sunburned twenty times just so she can see her older man as often as possible, who probably sees her more as her little sister than as an adult woman and sometimes I suffer, but everything is fine girls yeah yeha salalaaa I hope you have a good summer too!

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soahbee

1 year ago

What if we dress up as husband and wife on Halloween and stay that way forever? Just thinking

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soahbee

1 year ago

What if he has a girlfriend someday? How could you handle it?🥺

I love him unconditionally.

Which means if he find happiness with someone else instead of with me, I will accept it. It's okay. Because I want him to be happy and loved. And yes, unfortunately, this can happen at any time and how will I handle it? Horrible at first. I'll cry, have throw tantrums, shout at myself. I'll feel that the world has ended and a piece of my heart has been taken, "my place" has been taken away. But then I can't do anything but accept and put up with it. If I see that he is happy and good for him with that woman, then this knowledge puts a little band-aid on my broken heart and I'll stay by his side as his friend and student.

Okay I'm crying now lol

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soahbee

1 year ago

How can I calm down? Maybe if I sit on his lap? hmm and we make out for hours?? hmm

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