Apologize

Apologize

[Until Dawn] Samantha Giddings x Female Reader

Word Count: 2.04k

Proofread: Yes

Content Warnings: An argument, but nothing really specific

[A/N]: This one's really short compared to the others, but it's because that's what my intention was. I didn't want to stress out over this one, so I gave myself a really low goal of 2k words. It was fun to write this. Hope you'll enjoy. Not sure who I'll write for next. At the moment, I only have six more characters I want to write for.

Enjoy!

 It was extremely hard for Sam to get angry at someone, let alone get into an actual argument. She tended to be the level-headed one in her friend group, never one to willingly indulge in drama. Very rarely did she raise her voice in a non-joking manner, so when she did, the people around her she was close to got very uncomfortable. Not necessarily because she was threatening, but because it was so unlike her. Fortunately, her girlfriend was the same way. The two of them hardly ever got into an argument that wasn’t playful.

So when one broke out one night, both of them grew uncomfortable. They got defensive, with Sam trying to steer the conversation in another direction, and [Y/N] trying to just agree to disagree. Neither one of them really remembered how the argument started, but they both knew it wasn’t going anywhere.

Another thing that was uncommon for the two women was for them to say something hateful toward anyone, even if they felt threatened. During the entirety of their relationship, which was running strong for over three years, no one in their shared friend group had ever witnessed them fight with each other. Out of all of them, she and [Y/N] were usually the ones who stayed calm and tried to compromise and keep the peace. And when anyone needed to talk something through with a trusted friend, she and [Y/N] were the go-tos.

Somewhere in the middle of the argument, one of them had slightly raised their voice, which in turn prompted the other to do the same. This continued until they were almost yelling at each other, something they had never done to one another. It was causing a great deal of stress on them both. They couldn’t seem to find a way to fix whatever had begun the whole ordeal.

As they grew louder, Sam shouted something of ill-intent toward [Y/N] in the heat of the moment, wanting to just be done with the argument. In response, [Y/N] threw back a similarly hateful retort, claiming she wished they had never started dating. She didn’t mean to say it–neither of them meant to say any of it–it all just spilled out before they could stop it.

Sam froze at her words, grimacing as she fought back the tears pricking her eyes. She sniffled and took a breath to prevent her voice from breaking.

“If that’s how you feel, then…”

She paused, trying to calm herself down and think things through. After a moment, she pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed.

“I’ll give you some space. We both need to calm down before we even try to talk this through.”

[Y/N] huffed. Usually, she’d agree without hesitation. Because of her hurt feelings, however, she was hesitant to do so. Instead, she turned on her heel and stormed into the kitchen, then the pantry. There, she grabbed her car keys and left through the front door, passing Sam on her way out. She slammed the door behind her, and she instantly regretted doing so, but she couldn’t take it back. Not once in her relationship with Sam had an argument gotten this bad. The two of them had never said dating was a mistake, nor had they thrown nasty comments at each other out of frustration.

Sam didn’t know how to deal with the situation quite yet, and neither did [Y/N]. Silently, [Y/N] agreed with Sam about giving each other space before working things out.

She hopped into her car and switched the engine on, pulling out of the driveway and speeding down the road. Once she came to a red light, she popped a CD in and cranked the music up, wanting to drown out her hateful thoughts.

As she drove off to who knows where, Sam remained in the living room of their shared home. She plopped herself back down onto the sofa cushions and sighed, burying her face in her hands as she replayed the entire conversation over and over again in her mind. Each time she recalled the words she spoke, or rather hollered, she flinched, wanting nothing more than to take them back.

There was no excuse for what she said. She didn’t even really remember why things had gotten so aggressive.

As she sat there, counting the hours while she waited for [Y/N] to come home, her guilt began to grow even further. She promised herself she’d sit down and talk things out once they were together again.

Whenever that may be.

She should’ve stopped [Y/N] from leaving.

She should’ve asked her to sit down with her, or at least stay home.

She should’ve kept her cool and ended the argument before it began.

And all the while, as her guilt ate away at her conscience, [Y/N] was battling with her own mind nearly halfway across town.

How could she have said something so cruel? Sam didn’t deserve that at all. She had no right to be that crude towards her. She had been trying to change the subject, but [Y/N], for some reason she couldn’t figure out, refused to give in. Instead, she wanted to just “agree to disagree,” even though she knew that wouldn’t have ended very well. She and Sam were both very stubborn about their personal beliefs, meaning they’d struggle with that concept.

She knew that, and yet she continued to press on the matter.

She knew that, and yet she still blurted out that the relationship was a mistake.

She knew that, and yet she still stormed out of the house like a child.

With a heavy sigh of defeat, [Y/N] turned the car around and started her journey back to the house. One way or another, she’d find a way to work things out with Sam, even if it took all night.

By the time she made it back, it was well past midnight. Had she not known Sam well enough, she’d assume the blonde would be tucked away under the covers in their shared bed, sound asleep. However, she had known her all her life. She knew her thoughts, tendencies, insecurities, everything. And Sam was the same–they knew each other inside and out, which is what usually prevented these things from happening.

It was no surprise to [Y/N] when she unlocked the door and pushed it open to reveal Sam still sitting there on the couch. She glanced up from her spot on the cushions, a look of pure relief washing over her features. The blonde stood, stepping over to stand in front of [Y/N] once the door was shut and locked behind her. “Thank god you’re okay,” Sam whispered, lifting her hands to cup the smaller girl’s face and press their foreheads together. [Y/N] made no move to lean away from her touch, but rather leaned into her hands.

Her eyes shut softly when her head made contact with Sam’s, a small sigh of solace slipping past her lips. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m sorry I worried you.” The blonde smiled and hummed, letting her hands slide down [Y/N]’s arms to gently take hold of her hands. “You don’t have to apologize. You’re okay, and that’s all that matters.”

They stayed there for a moment, standing together under the dim light above the entryway to the den. Finally, Sam led her over to the couch and sat her down, joining her immediately after.

“I’m just gonna get right to the point. I’m really sorry I said what I did. I had no right to talk about you like that. I’m sorry, I really am,” Sam started, squeezing her hands in her own.

“I forgive you. And I’m sorry too,” [Y/N] replied just as quietly. “The fact I said our relationship was a mistake was disgusting. I didn’t mean a word of what I said, I swear. I just…I was hurt, and panicking, and I just wanted to say something to defend myself in the moment. I shouldn’t have said that though.”

Sam grinned, her thumb caressing the back of [Y/N]’s hand soothingly before bringing it up to press a kiss to her knuckles. “I forgive you,” she mumbled against her skin. “Could we both promise not to do that again though? I think that’s the most stress I’ve ever felt in our entire relationship.” [Y/N] chuckled at her words, bringing another genuine smile to her lips. “Yeah, I’d love to make that promise. Nearly cried my whole way home because I felt so bad about what happened.”

With a featherlike touch, Sam pulled [Y/N] into a hug, tucking her face against the crook of her neck and relaxing at the familiar scent of the girl’s shampoo and perfume. Her eyes fluttered shut, a silent sigh slipping through her lips, still perked up in a smile.

“I love you so much,” she whispered.

“I love you too,” came [Y/N]’s reply.

A moment passed, one far more comfortable than the situation from a few hours prior, and the two held onto each other as they swayed side to side. Finally, much to her embarrassment, a low rumble sounded from [Y/N]’s stomach, drawing both of their attention away. Sam leaned back and laughed gently. “Should we order something?” She questioned, already reaching for her phone laying face down on the coffee table.

[Y/N] nodded, laughing along with her. “Yeah. I was too worried during the entire drive to worry about eating, so…I guess it’s better late than never, right?” Sam smirked and nodded. “Yeah, that’s true. I’m in the same boat anyway. What sounds good? Not sure what’s open, but I’m sure we can find something good.”

[Y/N] beamed up at her, already feeling the previously thick tension dissolving at a rapid pace.

Sam picked up her phone after [Y/N] mentioned a few possible choices, clicking onto Google and scrolling through the open restaurants to find something that would satisfy both of their appetites. Eventually, they settled on something fairly cheap nearby, ordering said meal and setting everything up while they waited.

While [Y/N] stayed downstairs to pick something to watch on the TV, as well as gathering nearby blankets, Sam headed upstairs to their spare closet and picked out a few of the fluffiest pillows and blankets she could find. She trailed back downstairs, and the two of them bundled up together underneath their small fort of comfort. They were able to watch a decent amount of what [Y/N] had chosen to play on the screen before their order arrived.

Reluctantly, Sam left the comfort of all of the plush covers and pillows, already missing the warmth of [Y/N] by the time she made it to the door to pay the driver and take the order. Once everything was settled with the deliverer, Sam sauntered back over to the couch. She handed [Y/N] her order, including her drink, then managed to wriggle her way back into her previous spot before diving into her own dish.

As the two downed their food and rinsed it down with their drinks, they leaned further and further against each other. By the time they finished their meal and put the plastic containers and cutlery aside, [Y/N] was resting on top of Sam, both of them still buried underneath layers of their collection of blankets. Her head ended up planting itself atop the blonde’s chest, allowing her to listen to her heartbeat with ease.

Soft, delicate fingers raked their way through [Y/N]’s locks before a small kiss was pressed to her head. She glanced up curiously, only to find Sam beaming back down at her with a look of pure admiration. Her smile was returned just as warmly.

A moment or so passed before [Y/N] turned her head back to face the screen again. Her eyes began to flutter shut as Sam continued to stroke her hair. She fought to keep herself awake, but finally gave in when Sam mumbled a soft, “I love you,” and pressed another kiss to her head, lulling her deeper into slumber with ease.

Enamored

[Shadows of Rose] Rosemary Winters x Female Reader

Summary: After being isolated for the majority of her life, it's a breath of fresh air for Rose when she finally has someone she can talk to about whatever may be on her mind. And while she enjoys chatting away about everything, she loves to listen to you speak about anything at all, often finding herself enamored in every little thing about you.

Word Count: 640 Content Warnings: None Category: Heavy Fluff || Preference

[A/N]: This is just a really quick drabble. It felt nice to not necessarily worry about the length or the structure for this one.

Enjoy!

Throughout the entirety of her life, Rose had been isolated from others. Whether it was because of her issues that stemmed from the mold that ran through her veins or because of the soldiers that were constantly watching her wherever she went, she never grew close to anyone. That’s why meeting you was such a breath of fresh air for her. Not only did you pay no mind to the BSAA’s miniature army that always trailed after her, but you found her “defects” fascinating instead of terrifying or disgusting.

From the moment she had met you, Rose was enamored. You made her feel safe and seen. She could be herself around you without the constant worry of being made fun of and yelled at for the things she couldn’t control about herself. Whenever she had to be somewhere important and her palms would grow sweaty from her nerves, you wouldn’t hesitate to help her dry them, never repulsed by the molded texture that bubbled up against her skin.

Not only did you make her feel comfortable and confident, but you were also always there to lend an ear. Regardless of what she had to talk about – either Chris getting on her nerves and babying her or one of the other soldiers treating her like a tool instead of her own being – you welcomed her with open arms, ready to listen to her rant for hours on end.

Soon after growing close, she started to return the favor to you. Even if all you wanted to talk about was a bird on the windowsill that you thought was pretty or a random thing you had seen online that had annoyed you, you would instantly be met with her nodding along and chiming in, eager to show that she was interested in what you had to say.

She loved listening to you talk. It was nice to have someone to vent to when training was tough or Chris was on her case, but hearing you ramble on about every possible thing on your mind was her favorite thing of all. She loved your voice, the way you rolled your eyes or chuckled as you recalled something from your day, and the way your eyes seemed to shine when she would point out a small detail about your story that you hadn’t realized she paid attention to. She adored it all.

Often, you would look over in the middle of a sentence and find her gazing at you with a small grin toying at her lips, which tugged upwards into a wider smile when you met her eye. If you asked why she was looking at you that way, she’d admit without hesitation that she loves hearing you talk about your day. In fact, after a while of you shying away from the conversation halfway through out of fear of being too overbearing with the information you had already dumped on her, she’d encourage you, nearly begging you to keep going with what you were saying.

You were everything to her, and she was more than happy to learn something new about you with every word you chose to share. The stories about your life and your day captivated her each time without fail. The smallest of details that you would generally discard after sharing were noted and locked away in her mind. Nothing you could tell her would ever be seen as unimportant. You trusted her to tell her everything: the things that bothered you, made you happy, or your worries for the future. She refused to forget any of it. As little as it might’ve meant to you, it was vital for her.

You brought her the sense of solace she had been subconsciously craving her whole life, and she would always try her hardest to return the favor for you.

Admission

[Shadows of Rose] Rosemary Winters x Female Reader

Summary: Rose has grown to like you, though she keeps her feelings hidden, convinced that you wouldn't feel the same way. Her worries are relieved when you sit her down for a talk.

Word Count: 3.17k Content Warnings: Fear of rejection Category: Soft Angst + Heavy Fluff || One-shot

[A/N]: Reposting it just to see if the formatting issue was caused by the ask box.

Enjoy!

Blended between the gentle rustle of leaves and the soulful songs of birds chirping high above, hearty barks of laughter sprung to life. Trailing forward on the graveled path encircling the small scenic park, you and Rose snickered with each shared inside joke passed alongside light, playful pushes, uncaring of the eyes trained on you in curiosity and slight annoyance.

As she spoke about another joyous memory of hers, you couldn’t help but take notice of the features adorning the heavenly smile painted across Rose’s lips. Although her eyes only periodically met yours as she recalled and retold the story in her mind, the way they crinkled from the amusement – also evident in her tone – was prominent. Similarly, upon chuckling in response to a particularly comical moment, the bridge of her nose scrunched up, and you watched as her hands flew down to rest on her gut to prevent herself from doubling over as another wave of laughter erupted from her throat.

God, she was beautiful.

You’d known that since the moment you met her years ago during one of her outdoor training exercises. To this day you were unsure as to why she was suddenly allowed to train away from the BSAA grounds, though you would forever be grateful to the soldiers stationed there who let her be free for a day and enjoy the park between training sessions.

You remembered watching her in pure awe then, just as you continued to do now. Everything about her amazed you.

On that particular day when you had first met, it was inspiring to witness how effortlessly she seemed to move during practice, and even more breathtaking to see how intrigued she was by the nature that surrounded her when she was allowed a break. The way her cheesy grin grew as she watched two birds dancing up in the branches, how the brightness of her blue eyes filled with curiosity when they finally landed on you, how she eagerly bounced your way with her arm outstretched – each little characteristic she presented to you swept you off your feet.

“Hi, I’m Rose,” she chirped once you managed to snap out of your awestruck trance and take her hand into your own. When you timidly offered up your name, she nodded and repeated it. “Pretty name,” she noted out loud to herself. She hadn’t seemed to notice the way your body tensed, nor the way your face grew warm and red at her words. Instead, she asked what you were doing there, and more importantly why you’d been watching her.

A moment passed where you came forward with no explanation, desperately trying to find a good enough excuse that wouldn’t make you come across as odd to this new, bubbly girl. Finally, you forced yourself to admit that you thought what she had been doing looked cool. “Oh, really?” She asked, her brows raised. “Why don’t you join me then? It’ll be fun!”

At first you tried to deny her suggestion. All it took to win you over, however, was a small, drawn-out “please,” paired with the pleading eyes you would later learn to be her favorite way to convince you to do what she wanted. Ultimately, you agreed, and she led you to the small, secluded section of the park she had been using to train all day. Just as she had begun to explain one of the easier maneuvers, excited to have someone to finally talk to, a gruff, towering man approached, halting her small lesson with a question of his own.

“Who is this, Rose?”

She turned to him, all of a sudden trembling and waving her hands about as she did her best to defend herself to this strange man. “She’s just a friend,” was how she started, and his head cocked itself to the side, eyes trained heavily on you with some kind of emotion you couldn’t pinpoint. “I figured we could do a few of the training moves together for fun.” The man sighed, shoulders drooping with fatigue and rough hand raising to pinch the bridge of his nose. “Rose, we’ve been over this.”

“I know, but I just thought it wouldn’t hurt to ease up this once. Chris, I’ve been working so hard, just like you want me to, but I really want to take a break every once in a while. Why can’t I just relax for one day? Isn’t that why you brought me out here this time?”

You remembered standing there, hands practically tied together in an attempt to ease the harsh trembling they carried. The soft breeze that day only forced you to take notice of the frigid beads of sweat forming on the back of your neck, which you not-so-subtly swiped at as you listened to them speak. The nerves throughout your body spiked when the man, whose name you barely managed to pick up on as Chris, glared over at you once more.

Wordlessly, his gaze flickered between you and Rose. You could feel yourself melting beneath his crushing eyes, your own focus landing on the soft tufts of vibrantly green grass beneath your shoes.

“Just this once,” he said at length, prompting you to snap your head up to face him again. You weren’t sure who he was, but you could tell how important his word was to Rose, who had once again grown giddy at his permission. “Thank you, Chris,” she cheered as she tugged him sideways into a small hug.

She pulled you to a nearby spot and continued explaining the specific move she had tried to talk about earlier. Chris kept a watchful eye on the two of you, though you could tell it was more on you than her. After some time, you didn’t even notice him anymore, too engulfed in the game you and Rose had made up and started playing. By the time soft blues and purples began to paint the sky, you saw how he seemed to be more at ease around you, even offering you a kind smile before you parted ways with your new friend.

Now, as you trotted through the park with that same friend, it was all too easy to listen to her poke fun at a few failed training experiments she had with Chris over the years. Even with her teasing words, it was clear how much the man meant to her. “He’s like a second father to me,” she told you once.

As she finished her thought and turned to you, you blinked, unsure of whether or not she had asked you something. You had been too focused on how the palette of the setting sun casted itself beautifully over the blonde locks tucked underneath her cap and her pale skin, the hues alone making her look ethereal. You fidgeted with your phone in your pocket for a moment, wanting to capture her in that moment.

“Is there something on my face?” She questioned suddenly, subconsciously wiping her mouth as your silence briefly continued. “Oh, no,” you replied after finally coming back to your senses. “Sorry, I just kind of zoned out for a minute.” She hummed and nodded, a small smile toying effortlessly at the corners of her lips.

For a split second, you found yourself gawking at her again. Before she could catch you a second time, however, you coerced yourself to instead listen to the crunching of the gravel beneath your feet as they carried you forward, your eyes dropping to watch them do so. The cool wind that grazed over your skin was welcome in comparison to the burning sensation building up in your face, and you were unable to bite back a small huff of relief when it cooled and dried the droplets of sweat forming on your brow. Curiously, Rose glanced your way at the sound, though she looked ahead again when you said nothing more.

“So,” she started after walking a few more paces, “any ideas on what you want to do after high school? I mean, I know you told me about the college you want to go to and what you want to major in, but any plans for anything else?”

“Anything else?” You echoed. “What do you mean?”

Just as yours had done only a moment prior, Rose’s face seemed to burn scarlet red, though she quickly averted her eyes and turned her head to hide it. Forming a fist and bringing it up to cover her mouth, she cleared her throat and nodded. “Yeah, like…” She shrugged, though it seemed more like she was trying to get something off her shoulders than being casual about it. “I don’t know. Maybe start dating someone, or… do something else?” She scoffed. “I don’t know.” It hurt your heart to see her seem so anxious about something, but her tone and timidness brought a sense of endearment as well.

“Oh,” you blurted, mirroring her actions and turning away to hide the betrayal of your reddening features. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to make it awkward,” she murmured with a defeated sigh.

You desperately wanted to tell her she didn’t make anything awkward, wanted her to know there was nothing to feel guilty about, but it would be a blatant lie to say things weren’t uncomfortable. Instead, all you could offer up was a whispered “it’s okay.”

As the world around you quietened and settled to make way for the rising moon, your mind raced and scrambled for something more to say. “Well,” you squeaked out eventually. “I don’t know about dating anyone, but it would be nice to find a steady job so college doesn’t completely kick my ass.” A quiet chuckle slipped from her lips, though she seemed disappointed in your answer, her eyebrows creasing as though she had been expecting something else. Hoping for something else.

“Yeah,” was her only reply.

When your eyes finally wandered over to look at her, she seemed further away, her eyes slightly dull and that smile gone from her face entirely. Upon noticing this shift in her demeanor, you found yourself determined to cheer her up, eyes flickering around the area almost frantically for an escape from this tense atmosphere you had unintentionally built.

A few paces ahead was a bench, clear of other people and free from any potential prying eyes. As you crossed through the grass, Rose watched you with a hint of confusion, quickly trailing behind and ultimately joining you on the bench. Before any other thoughts could form, one thought in particular made itself known to you, one that had you crumbling slightly from fear.

It seemed the short-lived discussion of dating seemed to be the cause of her deflated charisma. Maybe bringing it up again in a different light would spark that gleam in her eyes again.

While your hands fiddled restlessly with the hem of your shirt, Rose looked around silently at the empty park, the tree behind the bench nearly drowning the both of you in total darkness as the sun continued to fall beneath the horizon. It took some time before she noticed your shuffling, though her face was quick to contort with concern when she did. “You alright?”

“Yeah, I just,” a quick clearing of your throat was made as an attempt to conceal the way your voice shook and cracked. “Can I be honest with you about something?” She nodded. “Of course.” “It has to do with what we were talking about earlier. About dating someone?” At your words, she seemed to perk up, a strange concoction of emotions flooding behind her gaze.

Even with the darkening shadows dimming any clarity given by her features, she made it evident that she had taken a sudden interest in what you had to say. She was eager.

You heard the rustling of her sleeves as her arms lurched forward toward you, only to falter and return to her sides, and could still make out the silhouette and the curve of her face when she winced at her own actions. You paid no mind to it, knowing that what you were wanting to say would probably bring you more grief than what she felt.

“I do actually like someone,” you mumbled, shying away from her gaze when it returned to you. “But will you promise me you won’t freak out if I tell you who it is?”

As if the incident from before had been replayed, she physically deflated at your words all over again.

“Uh,” she whispered, looking down unsurely.

“Yeah, sure. I promise.”

Her tone made you hesitate for a moment. If she was this upset just by you mentioning you had feelings for someone, how would she react to you admitting who it was? Before you could lose the nerve, you forced yourself to speak. “Well, she’s special to me. Ever since I met her, she’s done nothing but make me happy, and I feel like I can actually be myself around her. I feel… safe and secure with her, and I’ve honestly been picturing myself with her in the future.”

Each passing word seemed to crush Rose more and more, though you continued with this seemingly brutal torture anyway.

“She’s beautiful, and funny, and smart, and strong, and talented, and I didn’t realize how important she is to me until recently. I want to tell her how I feel and see if she feels the same, but I need you to be honest with me. Do you think she’d feel the same way?”

Bitterly, she shrugged and shifted her hands to toy with her fingers. “Depends,” she responded bluntly. “Who is it?”

“It’s you, Rose.”

For an agonizingly silent moment, all she could do was stare down at her hands, and you wondered to yourself if she had even heard you at all. Just as you parted your lips to repeat yourself, her head lifted and turned to you. The pale lighting from the slowly rising moon caressed her face, allowing you to see the starstruck expression that riddled her features. Shakily, she lifted her finger to point at herself. “Me?” She asked in disbelief, a scarlet red hue dusting across her cheeks.

When you nodded, it only took half a second before that gleaming smile you adored more than life itself broke out across her lips. “Oh,” she blurted, shrinking into herself a bit while her chipped nails tapped at the backs of her knuckles, her grin never fleeing.

Her eyes, although you couldn’t see them clearly in the little light provided, flickered down for a moment in thought before returning to your own gaze. “You’ve been picturing a future together with me?” You hummed and nodded, soft prickles bubbling up on the back of your neck as your mind tried to convince you of every possible way she could reject you then. The thumping of your heart skipped with fear when she laughed, and your head dipped down to hide your face.

“I never thought you’d actually feel the same way,” she confessed, hands writhing against one another. The moment the words left her lips, you found yourself glancing back up at her, eyes wide and mouth agape in shock. “You like me too?” Another soft chuckle. “Yeah, of course I do. I honestly thought I was horrible at hiding it, but apparently not.”

The corners of her lips perked up into a sly smirk. “Or maybe you’re just a little too dense for it.” Playfully, you smacked the side of her arm, which prompted another joyful laugh that you could never get enough of. Slowly, her hand slid over to cover yours and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “But in all seriousness, I really do like you. I’ve been wanting to tell you that for a while now, but I couldn’t bring myself to. I really didn’t think you would feel the same way.”

Tilting your head to the side, you gave a look of confusion. “What? Why wouldn’t I like you? You’re only, like, the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

She tucked her hair back out of her face before offering a small shrug as a response. Your question seemed to bring her a feeling of discomfort, and although you weren’t sure why, you were quick to try and think of a way to cheer her up again. Before you were able to speak, however, she answered you properly.

“Well, I mean… to be fair, I haven’t always exactly been liked. Before I met you, I had never actually fallen in love with anyone. Mainly because I’ve never been close to anyone before, but also because you’re the only person I actually feel safe with. I feel like I can be myself around you – like I finally mean something. You make me feel like I’m normal in all the best ways. Chris is nice, but he and the others have only raised me to be a bioweapon for them, and they don’t hide the fact that that’s how they see me. You, though… You make me feel human. You make me feel like I’m a real person who has her own purpose – her own life and future.

“And if I’m being honest? As corny as this is going to sound, I don’t want to live in any future for myself if you’re not in it. I was worried that if I confessed how I felt to you, you’d think I was weird or gross and wouldn’t want to be around me anymore. That’s why I kept trying to hide how I feel. I didn’t want to lose you.”

Each passing word only caused your smile to grow. As she spoke, you flipped your hand around in hers, allowing you to finally lace your fingers with hers. When she fell silent again, you gave her hand a small squeeze, similar to how she had done to you shortly before. “Well, now you don’t have to worry about it anymore. You know I feel the same, and you know I want to have a future with you.”

Slowly, she rose to her feet, then turned and helped you stand to look her in the eye. Even with the blackening shadows, you could still see the smitten gleam in her eyes, paired with the seemingly permanent smile on her lips. “Yeah, I guess you’re right,” she whispered.

“So what does that make us?” You stepped forward, arms flying out to encircle her and pull her flush against your body, prompting a small yelp to sound from her. As quickly as you had reached for her, she all but melted into your touch and held you just as tightly in return. “Well, I’d like to be your girlfriend,” you replied. “But only if you feel the same.”

Her shoulders shook slightly against you as she laughed, her fingernails digging in lightly to your shirt as she nodded. “Of course I feel the same, you dork. I’d love nothing more than to be able to call you mine.”

Hi! I just wanted to say your stories are really cool and I enjoy reading them a lot!

That’s all have a good day!

Hi there, hun! I really appreciate you being here, and I'm very happy you enjoy my work! I hope you'll enjoy my future works as well. Thank you for your support!

I hope your day/night is great as well! 🩵

Down the Barrel

[BATIM/BATDR] Alice Angel x Female Reader

Summary: Alice thinks you've betrayed her, assuming you gave away the location of her safehouse after she sees you talking to Allison and Tom. You have to save yourself from this misunderstanding.

Word Count: 4.24k Content Warnings: Toxic/abusive relationship, manipulation, syringes and injections, fear of abandonment, near-death experience, jealousy, manipulation, a "break up" between Reader and Alice Category: Heavy Angst || Oneshot

[A/N]: Alice and Reader have an extremely unhealthy relationship in this short story, but I am in no way trying to condone or romanticize it. There are multiple sensitive topics as listed above, so please look after yourself and avoid reading if you feel any of these are too heavy for you.

Enjoy!

 From close behind, merely inches away, you could hear the sound of Alice’s heels clicking against the warped planks beneath her. You had headed toward the vault door to head out for the day, but mistakenly forgot to let her know. Frigid fingers clasped themselves around your wrist and held you in place with a vice grip. A small tug backward was all it took for you to turn and face her. “Where do you think you’re going?” She pulled you closer, her hold on you never faltering, even as you stumbled forward from the motion. As she spoke, the one eye she still had intact narrowed, almost threatening you and daring you not to cower under her gaze.

Her tone was demeaning. Each time you tried to pull your arm from her clutch, her nails only dug deeper into your skin. With a harsh swallow, you managed to stammer out an answer. “I’m sorry, Alice. I meant to tell you, I just forgot. I was going to head down to a few of the lower levels to find a few supplies to help with your experiments.”

For a long, painful moment, she seemed to only drag out the thick tension, as though wanting you to feel the crushing consequence of blatantly ignoring the one rule she had set in place. After so long, you had managed to tear her walls down and get her to trust you, though there were still demands to be met. One of which she was more stubborn about than others. Each time you planned to leave the hidden corner of her sanctuary, you were to let her know ahead of time. If you forgot to do so, and if she wasn’t told of your whereabouts until you returned, the punishments could be ruthless.

You would be subjected to a few of her smaller, yet equally as merciless, experiments. They ranged from small tests of the weight her pulley-based traps could hold, all the way to enduring endless injections of different deadly concoctions she had developed over time, most of which would leave you bedridden for days or even weeks.

Those punishments were far worse. No matter what she kept in the syringe, the fiery jolt of pain that bursted through each vein throughout your body always seemed to be worse than the last. So little of her supplies could ease the throbbing pain that continued to torment you for weeks. Thankfully, she had eased up on carrying those punishments out as time went on. In her own twisted, demented way, she began to care for you, growing attached and increasingly fearful of losing you. Although it brought her sadistic joy to see you writhing from her tools and trials, she couldn’t bear the idea of bringing you to death’s door.

You were everything to her.

All she had left in the vile, rotten world that built the studio was you.

You weren’t spared from her tests, nor were you given a sense of freedom, but you were granted a promise she had made to keep you safe.

Even if you couldn’t avoid her line of fire when directed toward you, she made sure you were sheltered from the countless grueling abominations crawling just outside the door. Everyone beneath the domain of the crumbling studio feared two beings above everything else: the Ink Demon, and Alice Angel herself. You knew that those who were aware you were under her watch would drift apart in your favor. They’d give you room and split ways just to grant you a false sense of superiority that you knew was only caused by the fear they felt for the very woman who took you in.

Each time, even as you stood silent in front of her then, you wondered how differently your path would’ve been shaped if you had accepted the offer Allison and Tom had given you years ago to stay with them instead. With every experiment Alice put you through, you regretted turning them down more and more.

To pull you from your trance, Alice whisked your arm away and finally let go of your wrist, which had already begun to bruise. Eager to find relief, you pulled your hand to your chest to shield it as your fingers massaged the red skin. “Good,” was all she could bother to say. Still, she stood there, glaring at you expectantly. Your words seemed to bubble up in your chest and throat, though it was hard to free them.

“I should be back in two hours,” you managed to whisper weakly in the end.

The non-tattered portion of her lips tugged upward, mimicking a ghost of a smile. With her eyes still trained warily on you, she lifted her arms to cross them atop her chest. “You’d better keep true to your word,” she murmured with venom laced in her tone. As though she couldn’t be bothered to contribute to the stalemate any longer, she turned swiftly on her heel and traversed her way down the hall to return to her study, finally leaving you to your task.

Using the hand that hadn’t been throttled mere moments before, you turned the valve wheel as best you could to allow you to shove the bulky door open.

Once the steel was locked back in place behind you, your trembling legs hardly allowed you to weakly wobble forward. As you progressed to the elevator and stepped inside, some part of you screamed to run and leave Alice for good. If you weren’t so afraid of your only means of defense being stripped away, you would have left her long ago and joined Allison and Tom in their own safe house. They knew something was going on behind closed doors, but you always defended Alice without knowing why. You didn’t deserve her treatment. You knew that, and yet you stayed, but you couldn’t understand what prevented you from leaving.

You didn’t love her, and she didn’t seem to love you.

But some part of you knew what the reason likely was.

If you left, not only would people come after you, but Alice herself would hunt you like a bloodhound and take you out herself. She would probably drag you back to her sanctuary and return to the way things were when you had first been captured. There would be no restraint in her actions when she returned to experimenting on you, and you weren’t sure how many more injections you could take.

The only two people who were willing to save and protect you would also be thrown under attack, and the last thing you wanted to do was burden them with another threat. As far as you could tell, there was no way out.

The first two levels below Level 9 had nothing to offer. It seemed like someone had scavenged for supplies long before you, and you felt like you knew who it was. As you reached a floor even deeper than before, you recognized a small toolkit propped up against the only wall that hadn’t been soaked and molded with ink. Only one Angel, one who truly seemed to be a gift from heaven, carried such a particular set of tools, and waves of relief and ease crashed over your tensed form.

You meandered forward upon hearing distant murmuring combined with tin cans clanking together. As you sauntered further and neared the two shadows visible from a small office, you couldn’t help but glance over at a nearby clock, the swinging motion of the legs and arms catching your eye. Blood running cold, you realized you had been out far later than you had promised Alice you would be. Things were going to be even worse than when you had left once you returned.

But Allison and Tom were right there… you didn’t have to return.

They’d keep you safe.

With a quick breath to give yourself courage, you stepped into the office and greeted them. They turned, surprised, and smiled warmly.

A displeased grimace painted Alice’s lips as she stepped out of her study. She slammed the door behind her and charged her way to the door you had slipped through over three and a half hours before. You promised you’d be back in two hours. Where the hell had you gone?

Quickly, before leaving the hidden portion of her safe house, her clenched fist opened just long enough to snatch her tommy gun from its stand against the wall. As she muttered curse after curse under her breath, she strode to the elevator leading out of Level 9 and clicked down.With every floor that she searched, her fury and panic grew. No matter how far down she traveled, it seemed you weren’t anywhere to be found.

You betrayed her.

Lied to her.

You had to have planned something. You wouldn’t just leave her like that, would you?

Her scowl grew, and soon, she had reached one of the deepest parts of the studio. Cautiously, she forced herself to step out of the lift. Her hands clutched violently at her weapon to steady themselves as her surroundings seemed to fall further into unfamiliarity.

The halls grew longer until it seemed as though there was no end in sight. Shadows danced around the rotting ground as she pushed forward, the flickering lights soon dimming and falling as black as the ink that seeped into each wall, no life left to offer. Each step caused the floorboards to creak and wail beneath her weight, prompting a part of her mind to warn her of the possibility that the floor might give way at any moment. Breathing ragged and sharp, she eventually found the end of the hall she had been creeping down and turned to the right.

Down the adjacent corridor, a blazing glow sparked to life, providing negative space for the silhouettes of three shifting figures. With piqued curiosity, Alice couldn’t help but give in to her interest in who would dare to travel so far down to the hellish depths even the Demon himself avoided. She carried toward the source of light, body hugging the wall as she made her best effort to silence her footsteps.

With every shuffle closer, she could make out the sounds of two voices, both feminine, though no matter how hard she strained her hearing, she couldn’t make out any words. By the time she was only a few steps from the doorway, she could finally recognize the different voices. Both realizations made her blood boil beneath her skin.

You were there, speaking so casually with Allison, meaning the only other person who could be in the room as well was Tom. She could feel herself begin to seethe. Her jaw clenched as she struggled to ignore every burning nerve in her body that screamed for her to enter the office. Even without seeing you and the two people she despised the most, she could hear how relaxed the conversation seemed to be. Far too blinded by rage, she failed to listen to what was being said, only able to come up with her own dialogue.

Before anyone could take notice of her presence, she slipped away from the room and stormed back to the lift, now uncaring of the haunted surroundings in her path.

She hadn’t paid attention to where she was going. By the time she focused back in on her actions, she found herself standing stiff just before the entrance to her sanctuary. She glanced down at her hands, both trembling and desperately gripping at the grip and handguard. Behind her ribs, her heartbeat grew rapid and uneven, hammering harshly against them and causing her gasps for breath to stutter.

How could you leave her like that? Were you going to leave her for Allison? The copycat who stole everything from her?

She wouldn’t let you–couldn’t let you. You were all she had, and she was all you had. She needed you, you needed her, she loved you, you loved her, did you not?

What could she do to make you stay? Was there anything she could even do at that point? You had deceived her, made her believe you were coming back when you weren’t. That had to have been your plan: to make everything seem natural until you could get away and run to the safety of Allison and Tom. She knew they’d take you away from her in a heartbeat if you so much as asked.

She was going to lose you, she was sure. Lose the only bit of light she still had down in the world of hell she had lived alone in for so long.

Surely there was a way for her to convince you she was worth staying with.

She knew she was worthy, she just wasn’t sure how to prove it to you.

You had only been there for a short amount of time in comparison to the other poor souls trapped and sequestered from the world. You had no way of knowing the full extent of what she was capable of, nor what she was willing to do to get what she wanted. At that moment, you were all she wanted–all she needed.

You weren’t going to leave her.

She made sure of that as she heard footsteps approaching behind her. One glance over her shoulder confirmed it was you. Without hesitation, she hid herself behind the wall adjoining the hall you were headed down. As you emerged into the opening, an inky arm erupted from your side and blocked you for a brief moment. Just as quickly, the hand obstructing your path seized the collar of your shirt and yanked you forward.

The owner of the force revealed themself, and Alice–just like she had done before you left–stood before you, her face mere inches from your own. The vice grip against your blouse didn’t falter as she made the motion to shake you back and forth for an instant. When you swayed back the first time, she lifted her opposite arm and shoved her weapon toward your head.

Swallowing hard, you could only stare down the barrel of her gun as you tried to make sense of what was happening. Her piercing gaze met your fearful eyes once you managed to tear your focus away from what threatened your life.

“You vile, unforgivable wretch,” she growled. “How dare you? First, you deceive me, telling me you’ll return. Then, when I finally find you long after when you had promised to come back to me, I find you practically fawning over that damned copycat you’re always so cordial with. Heaven only knows why I ever allowed you to speak to them. They’re trying to steal yet another belonging of mine, just as they’ve done time and time again in the past.

“I won’t allow it this time. I’ll hide you away so they can’t find you and take you away from me. Somewhere they don’t know of, especially after you gave away where we’ve both been hiding past my sanctuary. I bet you want them to swoop in and save you from everything, don’t you? Is that why you told them where the safe house is? Oh, I’m sure you begged for that woman, Allison, to take you home with her and that disgusting clone that follows her like a lost puppy. Isn’t that right, you conniving little devil?”

For so long, even after she had finished voicing her list of accusations, you simply stared, entirely limp in her grasp. War raged on in your mind, begging you to say something, anything. Anything at all.

The feeling of the gun’s barrel thrusting forward to dig in against the space between your eyes finally coerced your mouth to form words again. “Alice,” you stammered out, “I never told them where we’re hiding, I promise. I was only catching up and asking where I could find the stuff you need for your tests.”

A snarl was your response at first, though she was quick to bark a retort. “You aren’t going to fool me again, you damned traitor. All you’ve done today is feed me lie after lie, and I refuse to let it continue. Why should I believe you now, knowing it could be yet another story you’re creating just to save your skin?” Once again, you tried to find a way to reason with her, desperately aching for her to let you go and pull the gun from your head. “Alice, I’m sorry. I really thought it would only take a couple of hours to find supplies, but Allison and Tom had already gathered them from the first levels downstairs, so I had to go further down to find things. That’s where I found them, and I was asking if they had anything to spare.

“If I had really told them where we were hiding, wouldn’t I have just brought them here with me? It’s easy to get lost in the studio. Just giving directions wouldn’t do anything. It’s like a maze trying to get to our safety zone. Even with their experience, I doubt they’d be able to find it without being noticed.”

Much to your relief, each point you had to offer compelled her to loosen her grip until ultimately you fell to the floor. She stared down at you, face devoid of any emotion as she processed all that you had said. You mustered up the strength to rise from the ground and stand on wobbly legs. It took everything in you to meet her eye as you did so, trying your best to fein a look of concern.

“You don’t really think I’d betray you, do you?”

She simply stood there in silence, her one good eye boring down blankly at you.

“Let’s go,” she grumbled, her gun falling to her side and her free hand slipping into yours to tug you along behind her.

She turned, then began the long journey back to the safe house. A thick, heavy tension hung in the air between the both of you. The silence was deafening, and even as you hopelessly tried to think of what to say to ease into some kind of conversation, not a word was uttered by the time you had made it to the vault door. Alice turned the valve wheel and forced the door open, letting you step inside before her so she could shut and lock it behind her.

You turned to her, watched as she dropped her gun on the table seated in the center of the foyer, then silently trailed behind her as she walked to your shared bedroom. When you stepped forward to cross the doorway and join her in the room, she practically slammed the door in your face, making you stumble backward in shock.

“Alice?” You questioned with a small knock on the sturdy wooden surface.

“Leave me be,” was all you could hear.

Huffing out a sigh and letting your shoulders slump in defeat, you trudged away from the room and instead wandered into the office across the hall to rest on the sofa pressed against the mirroring wall.

Hours had passed by the time you found yourself once again standing just outside the bedroom. You knocked, but got no response. As your lips parted to let you speak, Alice’s voice interrupted. “Come in.” In an attempt to steel your spiked nerves, you sucked in a deep breath.

Hand trembling, you grasped at the handle of the door, twisting it and slowly pushing forward to reveal more and more of the bedroom, waiting for her to holler at you that she had changed her mind and wanted you gone.

Seated slouched over on the edge of the bed, Alice merely glanced over at you before her head dipped down to hide the shameful expression that contorted her face. Slowly, too afraid to make a wrong move and upset her, you shuffled to sit by her side. Still, she refused to meet your gaze. One moment passed, then two, and soon you had begun to bounce your leg and pick relentlessly at the hem of your shirt.

A frigid hand planted itself softly against your leg to still it. You peered up to find Alice finally looking back at you. Eventually, you sighed, letting your hand rest on top of hers. “Could I ask you something?” You asked faintly. A nod was your response.

“Do you truly believe I would ever betray you?”

She chuckled. “Honestly? With all I’ve put you through, I wouldn’t blame you. I’d hate you for it, but I know I’d do the same. I talk so much of keeping you safe, but I’ve put you through so much hell. All the experiments I’ve forced on you, all the punishments I’ve given you because you simply did as you pleased, every time I’ve put you down or hurt you… You don’t deserve any of it, and I truly am sorry, but you have to understand my side of this, too. You never fully know who you can trust down here, darling. You know I adore you, even though I have a horrible way of expressing it, but I’ve been living with this paranoia for so long. It’s hard to just ignore it. I hope you can find it in yourself to try and understand.

“On top of everything today, you were speaking to the two people down here who I tried to hunt down for years. Until recently, we had never been civil with one another. You changed that, but I know they still don’t enjoy my company. They don’t hide it well at all. I can’t say I blame them for that either.”

You felt a small spark of frustration grow at her words, blurting out what flooded your mind before you could stop yourself. “Alice, I know you’ve been through hell down here, too, but that gives you no right to torture me the way you do. You’re right: I don’t deserve any of the experiments you put me through, and I sure as hell don’t deserve the punishments that I get for being myself. And the shittiest part of all of this is that, even though you’re a horrible person, I still can’t bring myself to leave.” You laughed, tears welling up and blurring your vision, unable to bite back the feelings you had kept bottled up for so long.

“That’s so fucked up, isn’t it? That after how much shit you put me through, I still want you to like me. Some part of me believes you’d stop hurting me if I just bend over backwards to make you happy, that if I walk on eggshells long enough, you’ll see me as a human being. As a person–as an individual. Someone you can’t toy with and boss around. God, I hate this. I hate you, but the stupidest part of me loves you.

“I don’t want to feel this anymore. I want to be happy, and I know I sure as hell won’t feel that way if I stay here with you. I have to leave, whether you like it or not.” You stood then, ready for her to bolt up and scream at you that you needed to remember your place around her. Instead, she laughed, a deep bellow that slowly quieted down. Once more, she stared down at the floor beneath her. “I know. I saw this coming. You should probably leave now. The reality of this hasn’t kicked in for me yet, but once it does, I know I’ll only hurt you. Leave me, break me, and go live with Allison and Tom.”

You scoffed. There was no possible way she was still trying to guilt-trip you, was there? But you knew her better. She was absolutely trying to do so.

You weren’t going to fall for it any longer.

You stepped closer, leaning down to let your face rest dangerously close to her own.

“Rot in hell,” you snarled, matching the same tone she had always used when speaking down to you as though you were a mindless child.

Alice grinned and watched as you fled from the room in an instant. She sighed heavily. Already, the fury and possessiveness she had grown accustomed to began to bubble its way to the surface. Her blood lit ablaze throughout her veins, only being stifled by her nails digging painfully into her thigh and drawing blood.

In truth, she genuinely had seen this coming. All throughout the time you had shared, she knew what she was doing to you was horrendous, and she knew you’d find the courage to leave one day. There would always be a part of her that wanted to keep you chained by her side and selfishly save you for herself, but she had to disregard it for you.

As vile as what she had done, she loved you. Yet, just as she had done all her life, she had pushed the very thing keeping her alive away.

You were leaving, and this time you wouldn’t return.

She deserved to rot in hell, as you had put it.

You deserved to join others who would treat you the way you truly deserved.

You were leaving.

She would be alone all over again.

You were never coming home.

Far away, down the hall and past each room, the front door slammed shut.

Pure Admiration

[Shadow of the Tomb Raider] Lara Croft x Female Reader

Word Count: 2.03k

Proofread: No

Content Warnings: A really corny ending (bear with me), very brief mentions of death, soft anxiety

Categories:

Angst Fluff Mix

One-Shot Preference Headcanon

[A/N]: This was more of a drabble than an actual individual chapter. Not proofread, but the ending is still extremely cheesy, so feel free to ignore it if you'd like.

[A/N] #2: Most likely going to rewrite this sometime in the future, but I currently have six more characters I plan on writing for first.

Enjoy!

Throughout the time she spent during and after the trip to Yamatai, Lara was often seen with a deadpan expression and heard with a cold or uninterested tone by anyone who happened to stumble across her path. Trinity soldiers, paparazzi, Jonah, Sam, and everyone alike had grown accustomed to glancing over at any given moment, and even when she was talking about something she was passionate about, there was always a sense of stress or frustration laced within each crease that lined her face.

Even before her first independent expedition, it wasn’t uncommon to see her scowling down in confusion as she reread over pages and pages of books she had carried to study with, murmuring that she had to be missing something. It had taken a toll on her appearance too–due to the countless nights she spent staying up to continue her research, her eyes had grown dull and heavy with fatigue. It only added to the look of exasperation that seemed to constantly adorn her features.

 To most, it was almost seen as a trademark feature of hers–a part of her that would never fully disappear. It was why it was such a surprise to the people closest to her when [Y/N] came into the picture. For once, it seemed as though Lara was finally at ease with someone other than herself. When Jonah or Sam would glance over at the two, it was hard not to mirror Lara’s contagious smile as she chatted away happily with [Y/N] about whatever came to mind.

Not once did Lara hold an ounce of resentment or irritation in her tone or eyes when she would gaze over at the younger woman. Instead, there was a sense of admiration, one in which seemed to bring out the best of her. In cases where she’d usually grow stubborn and aggressive toward whoever she was bickering with, [Y/N] was somehow able to extinguish even the smallest feelings of fury that might’ve sparked to life beneath her skin, always steering the conversation to something everyone could seemingly agree with before things escalated too far.

And over time, the effects [Y/N] had on Lara began to shift into her everyday way of looking at things. Where she’d once swipe everything off her desk and clutch handfuls of her hair in utter frustration, her head pounding from lack of sleep and confusion as to why she couldn’t figure something out, she’d instead take a moment to herself and focus on something else before moving back when she was ready. She found it helped her get things done much quicker, as well as prevent the high levels of stress she had grown used to, though she wasn’t entirely aware it was [Y/N] who had ultimately caused it.

Even when Lara wasn’t with her, doing so much as talking about [Y/N] was enough to lighten her mood. It was evident to anyone who even managed to glance over at the right time. Something had lifted her spirits with the mere mention of it, that much was obvious, though they never knew what. Although Lara didn’t visit Sam often, Jonah made sure to fill her in about every time the brunette would start rambling on and on about the other woman, much to Sam’s amusement. When Lara would visit here and there, she’d be gently teased about her “little crush,” in which she’d deny her feelings and try her best to change the subject.

Sam eased up on her taunting remarks after a while, but eventually asked Lara when she planned on asking [Y/N] out, her previously chipper tone suddenly serious. Again, Lara denied how she felt and shifted the topic before she made an excuse to leave. As she went to bed that night, however, she found herself pondering whether or not she had actually fallen for someone.

She didn’t get any sleep, too busy tossing and turning as she desperately tried to get the image of [Y/N] out of her mind. Each time she’d think about her kind smile, her comforting hugs, her cheerful and comforting demeanor, Lara would hide her face behind her hands or bury it in her pillow, groaning at the feeling of a burning warmth enveloping her skin.

After another night or so of this, she somehow found that she was able to fall asleep, although she had to hold one of her pillows to her chest. Unwillingly, she pictured it was [Y/N]’s sleeping form against her own. Her face burned with embarrassment the next morning when she discovered she had clutched onto the plush surface rather tightly throughout the night, and she hesitantly found herself shoving the pillow back up against the headboard. She scolded herself before forcing her weakened body out of bed to start her day.

There was no way she could possibly be in love with someone she had known for such a short amount of time.

Was there?

It took months for her to finally come to terms with her emotions enough to finally ask for advice, and since she was away on a trip without any way to talk to Sam, she confided in Jonah. As they pushed their way through the ground of the forest, hacking down loose branches and bushes that blocked the path with a makeshift machete, she not-so-casually admitted she might actually feel something for [Y/N]. She had expected him to be surprised in one way or another, but he quickly let her know she wasn’t great at hiding it.

Sheepish, she tried to brush it off and ignore the fact she ever brought it up, but Jonah insisted that he didn’t mind. He told her how relieving it was to see her so happy with someone–that she deserved to find someone special and spend time with them rather than constantly hiding away in her study to bury herself in research.

Even with a grumble rebutting the remark of essentially stowing herself away, Lara couldn’t deny that it felt nice caring so deeply for someone. She had cared for others before, sure: Jonah and Sam were like family to her at this point. But this felt different. It felt intimate and passionate in all the right ways.

Trudging their way up a hill to set up a base camp for the night, she and Jonah cautiously talked about ways to get Lara to confess, both too worried of crossing a boundary and upsetting the brunette. Jonah knew it was a touchy subject when it came to romance and settling down to start a family with her, but Lara was terrified of messing things up more than anything. She had finally found someone she loved like no other, and given that she had no prior relationship experience, the question of whether or not she would ruin things hung heavy in the back of her mind with every thought that flashed through.

Nothing else was mentioned about Lara’s feelings for the remainder of the journey, but once the two of them were seated in the plane headed back home, the testy topic was picked up again. Jonah had to keep reminding Lara that there was no reason to get defensive, that it was okay to be open about how she felt. It took nearly an hour, but she finally got it.

She had never had any kind of crush before–never understood why girls back in junior high and high school would gossip about the people they had their eyes on–she had no idea how to express how she felt. Although it was difficult, she knew she could trust Jonah, and she finally managed to talk about exactly how she felt.

Another few months had passed, and it had almost been a year by the time Lara was ready to confess how she felt to [Y/N]. Every time she thought of how long it had taken to muster up the courage, she felt ridiculous. It had taken her nearly a full year to realize how she felt and actually act on it. Normally, when she felt something strong bubbling up within her, she acted on it right away. Granted, those feelings were usually ones of annoyance at someone going against her wishes or determination to find an ancient ruin she had been studying for weeks.

Regardless, she scolded herself for being so cowardly, reminding herself that she’d need confidence if she were to ever get rid of the feeling of anxiety that stemmed from how she felt about the other woman–who seemed to increasingly plague more and more of her thoughts with every passing day.

At first, she thought she could go all out for her confession, wanting it to be special. She decided against that quickly, however, upon remembering something as simple as a location or a certain activity could be special on its own. She also cringed at the idea of a large event for something that could go wrong, though she hated the idea of a huge confession either way.

Yes, she wanted things to be special and go smoothly, but that didn’t mean other people had to be there to witness it. Whether or not it went well was nobody else’s business. Plus, the mere thought of being around other people made her anxious. The idea was discarded faster than it had even crossed her mind.

Finally, after getting different ideas from Sam and Jonah, Lara setup something small, invited [Y/N] to join her, and eventually managed to confess how she felt, unable to look the other woman in the eye as she awaited her response. Pure relief washed over her senses once [Y/N] voiced that her feelings were mutual. A short while later, Lara asked [Y/N] to be her girlfriend, to which she said yes as well.

Jonah was the first to congratulate Lara, given that he was essentially the wingman in the situation, and Sam was quick to tease her about what she planned to wear at the wedding. Lara brushed her off with a playful laugh each time, though she wouldn’t deny that she had already begun planning out the wedding anyway.

Somehow, each time anyone saw the two of them together, Lara always seemed to be in a cheerful mood, uncharacteristically lively and energetic. She was friendlier towards others, so long as she knew they weren’t making [Y/N] uncomfortable.

And just like before, when they hadn’t been dating, anyone with a set of working eyes was able to see the absolute admiration swelling up in Lara’s eyes whenever they’d land on [Y/N]. Her eyes never dimmed with disinterest or disgust, but rather lit up with love and genuine joy. Her fingers would often be seen laced with the other woman’s, allowing her to give a squeeze here and there, whether it be reassuring, teasing, or simply because she enjoyed being there with her. As they talked about anything and everything, [Y/N] would lean into Lara’s side, and in turn, Lara would rest her head atop the younger woman’s, still glancing down at her here and there just to see the face of the one she had fallen so deeply in love with.

The look in her eye only grew stronger as the years went on, and the two ultimately married, ready to settle down for good. During the vows, Lara spoke about how gleeful [Y/N] made her feel over the years, and Jonah and Sam couldn’t help but smile at each other in understanding. They had been there to witness the joy. They knew it wasn’t temporary.

Even when Lara and [Y/N] would argue, as most couples do, it never caused that gleam in Lara’s eye to falter. It grew and grew, all the way into their thirties, then forties, then fifties, and continued to grow until their eyes closed for the final time. Had anyone outside looked into their life, even the most cynical of onlookers couldn’t wholeheartedly deny how in love they were, nor could they ignore the admiration that had burrowed in and made itself at home in Lara’s gaze, there 'til the day she died.