Pure Admiration

Pure Admiration

[Shadow of the Tomb Raider] Lara Croft x Female Reader

Word Count: 2.03k

Proofread: No

Content Warnings: A really corny ending (bear with me), very brief mentions of death, soft anxiety

Categories:

Angst Fluff Mix

One-Shot Preference Headcanon

[A/N]: This was more of a drabble than an actual individual chapter. Not proofread, but the ending is still extremely cheesy, so feel free to ignore it if you'd like.

[A/N] #2: Most likely going to rewrite this sometime in the future, but I currently have six more characters I plan on writing for first.

Enjoy!

Throughout the time she spent during and after the trip to Yamatai, Lara was often seen with a deadpan expression and heard with a cold or uninterested tone by anyone who happened to stumble across her path. Trinity soldiers, paparazzi, Jonah, Sam, and everyone alike had grown accustomed to glancing over at any given moment, and even when she was talking about something she was passionate about, there was always a sense of stress or frustration laced within each crease that lined her face.

Even before her first independent expedition, it wasn’t uncommon to see her scowling down in confusion as she reread over pages and pages of books she had carried to study with, murmuring that she had to be missing something. It had taken a toll on her appearance too–due to the countless nights she spent staying up to continue her research, her eyes had grown dull and heavy with fatigue. It only added to the look of exasperation that seemed to constantly adorn her features.

 To most, it was almost seen as a trademark feature of hers–a part of her that would never fully disappear. It was why it was such a surprise to the people closest to her when [Y/N] came into the picture. For once, it seemed as though Lara was finally at ease with someone other than herself. When Jonah or Sam would glance over at the two, it was hard not to mirror Lara’s contagious smile as she chatted away happily with [Y/N] about whatever came to mind.

Not once did Lara hold an ounce of resentment or irritation in her tone or eyes when she would gaze over at the younger woman. Instead, there was a sense of admiration, one in which seemed to bring out the best of her. In cases where she’d usually grow stubborn and aggressive toward whoever she was bickering with, [Y/N] was somehow able to extinguish even the smallest feelings of fury that might’ve sparked to life beneath her skin, always steering the conversation to something everyone could seemingly agree with before things escalated too far.

And over time, the effects [Y/N] had on Lara began to shift into her everyday way of looking at things. Where she’d once swipe everything off her desk and clutch handfuls of her hair in utter frustration, her head pounding from lack of sleep and confusion as to why she couldn’t figure something out, she’d instead take a moment to herself and focus on something else before moving back when she was ready. She found it helped her get things done much quicker, as well as prevent the high levels of stress she had grown used to, though she wasn’t entirely aware it was [Y/N] who had ultimately caused it.

Even when Lara wasn’t with her, doing so much as talking about [Y/N] was enough to lighten her mood. It was evident to anyone who even managed to glance over at the right time. Something had lifted her spirits with the mere mention of it, that much was obvious, though they never knew what. Although Lara didn’t visit Sam often, Jonah made sure to fill her in about every time the brunette would start rambling on and on about the other woman, much to Sam’s amusement. When Lara would visit here and there, she’d be gently teased about her “little crush,” in which she’d deny her feelings and try her best to change the subject.

Sam eased up on her taunting remarks after a while, but eventually asked Lara when she planned on asking [Y/N] out, her previously chipper tone suddenly serious. Again, Lara denied how she felt and shifted the topic before she made an excuse to leave. As she went to bed that night, however, she found herself pondering whether or not she had actually fallen for someone.

She didn’t get any sleep, too busy tossing and turning as she desperately tried to get the image of [Y/N] out of her mind. Each time she’d think about her kind smile, her comforting hugs, her cheerful and comforting demeanor, Lara would hide her face behind her hands or bury it in her pillow, groaning at the feeling of a burning warmth enveloping her skin.

After another night or so of this, she somehow found that she was able to fall asleep, although she had to hold one of her pillows to her chest. Unwillingly, she pictured it was [Y/N]’s sleeping form against her own. Her face burned with embarrassment the next morning when she discovered she had clutched onto the plush surface rather tightly throughout the night, and she hesitantly found herself shoving the pillow back up against the headboard. She scolded herself before forcing her weakened body out of bed to start her day.

There was no way she could possibly be in love with someone she had known for such a short amount of time.

Was there?

It took months for her to finally come to terms with her emotions enough to finally ask for advice, and since she was away on a trip without any way to talk to Sam, she confided in Jonah. As they pushed their way through the ground of the forest, hacking down loose branches and bushes that blocked the path with a makeshift machete, she not-so-casually admitted she might actually feel something for [Y/N]. She had expected him to be surprised in one way or another, but he quickly let her know she wasn’t great at hiding it.

Sheepish, she tried to brush it off and ignore the fact she ever brought it up, but Jonah insisted that he didn’t mind. He told her how relieving it was to see her so happy with someone–that she deserved to find someone special and spend time with them rather than constantly hiding away in her study to bury herself in research.

Even with a grumble rebutting the remark of essentially stowing herself away, Lara couldn’t deny that it felt nice caring so deeply for someone. She had cared for others before, sure: Jonah and Sam were like family to her at this point. But this felt different. It felt intimate and passionate in all the right ways.

Trudging their way up a hill to set up a base camp for the night, she and Jonah cautiously talked about ways to get Lara to confess, both too worried of crossing a boundary and upsetting the brunette. Jonah knew it was a touchy subject when it came to romance and settling down to start a family with her, but Lara was terrified of messing things up more than anything. She had finally found someone she loved like no other, and given that she had no prior relationship experience, the question of whether or not she would ruin things hung heavy in the back of her mind with every thought that flashed through.

Nothing else was mentioned about Lara’s feelings for the remainder of the journey, but once the two of them were seated in the plane headed back home, the testy topic was picked up again. Jonah had to keep reminding Lara that there was no reason to get defensive, that it was okay to be open about how she felt. It took nearly an hour, but she finally got it.

She had never had any kind of crush before–never understood why girls back in junior high and high school would gossip about the people they had their eyes on–she had no idea how to express how she felt. Although it was difficult, she knew she could trust Jonah, and she finally managed to talk about exactly how she felt.

Another few months had passed, and it had almost been a year by the time Lara was ready to confess how she felt to [Y/N]. Every time she thought of how long it had taken to muster up the courage, she felt ridiculous. It had taken her nearly a full year to realize how she felt and actually act on it. Normally, when she felt something strong bubbling up within her, she acted on it right away. Granted, those feelings were usually ones of annoyance at someone going against her wishes or determination to find an ancient ruin she had been studying for weeks.

Regardless, she scolded herself for being so cowardly, reminding herself that she’d need confidence if she were to ever get rid of the feeling of anxiety that stemmed from how she felt about the other woman–who seemed to increasingly plague more and more of her thoughts with every passing day.

At first, she thought she could go all out for her confession, wanting it to be special. She decided against that quickly, however, upon remembering something as simple as a location or a certain activity could be special on its own. She also cringed at the idea of a large event for something that could go wrong, though she hated the idea of a huge confession either way.

Yes, she wanted things to be special and go smoothly, but that didn’t mean other people had to be there to witness it. Whether or not it went well was nobody else’s business. Plus, the mere thought of being around other people made her anxious. The idea was discarded faster than it had even crossed her mind.

Finally, after getting different ideas from Sam and Jonah, Lara setup something small, invited [Y/N] to join her, and eventually managed to confess how she felt, unable to look the other woman in the eye as she awaited her response. Pure relief washed over her senses once [Y/N] voiced that her feelings were mutual. A short while later, Lara asked [Y/N] to be her girlfriend, to which she said yes as well.

Jonah was the first to congratulate Lara, given that he was essentially the wingman in the situation, and Sam was quick to tease her about what she planned to wear at the wedding. Lara brushed her off with a playful laugh each time, though she wouldn’t deny that she had already begun planning out the wedding anyway.

Somehow, each time anyone saw the two of them together, Lara always seemed to be in a cheerful mood, uncharacteristically lively and energetic. She was friendlier towards others, so long as she knew they weren’t making [Y/N] uncomfortable.

And just like before, when they hadn’t been dating, anyone with a set of working eyes was able to see the absolute admiration swelling up in Lara’s eyes whenever they’d land on [Y/N]. Her eyes never dimmed with disinterest or disgust, but rather lit up with love and genuine joy. Her fingers would often be seen laced with the other woman’s, allowing her to give a squeeze here and there, whether it be reassuring, teasing, or simply because she enjoyed being there with her. As they talked about anything and everything, [Y/N] would lean into Lara’s side, and in turn, Lara would rest her head atop the younger woman’s, still glancing down at her here and there just to see the face of the one she had fallen so deeply in love with.

The look in her eye only grew stronger as the years went on, and the two ultimately married, ready to settle down for good. During the vows, Lara spoke about how gleeful [Y/N] made her feel over the years, and Jonah and Sam couldn’t help but smile at each other in understanding. They had been there to witness the joy. They knew it wasn’t temporary.

Even when Lara and [Y/N] would argue, as most couples do, it never caused that gleam in Lara’s eye to falter. It grew and grew, all the way into their thirties, then forties, then fifties, and continued to grow until their eyes closed for the final time. Had anyone outside looked into their life, even the most cynical of onlookers couldn’t wholeheartedly deny how in love they were, nor could they ignore the admiration that had burrowed in and made itself at home in Lara’s gaze, there 'til the day she died.

Outcasted Safeguard

[Shadows of Rose] Rosemary Winters x Female Reader

Summary: Rose is generally isolated outside of training, but because of this, it's hard for her to be reasonable about standing up for the one person she's grown attached to.

Word Count: 2.24k Content Warnings: Language (?), a small argument Category: Angst + Fluff || One-shot

[A/N]: None.

Enjoy!

“Why don’t you just fuck off?” “Rose, for god’s sake!” You watched with growing frustration as your friend scoffed at your girlfriend, Rose, before spinning on their heel. “Hey, wait,” you called out, trying desperately to get them to stop. “No, fuck this. We can talk when your freak of a girlfriend isn’t breathing down your neck,” they barked back, lifting their middle finger high in your direction before storming out through the small entrance of the library and into the parking lot.

Sorrow mixed with fury contorted your features, the lines across your skin creasing further upon noticing the way people around you murmured and glanced between you and Rose. Grumbling under your breath, you huffed and took off toward the other exit. Just as quickly, Rose followed behind, calling out your name in confusion. “Where are you going?” She questioned once you made it out onto the sidewalk.

“Anywhere but here. You really know how to cause a scene.” The words instantly seeped into her mind and nipped at her insecurity. “I wasn’t trying to cause a scene,” she replied, “I just didn’t like the way they were speaking to you. You don’t deserve that.”

All you were able to do was glare at her in that moment, unaware of how her heart throbbed under the weight of your piercing gaze. Upon making it to your car, you fought the urge to leave her behind and head home alone, watching through the corner of your eye as she timidly climbed into the passenger seat and swiped her palms against her jeans to try and dry the molded sweat forming on her palms.

Wordlessly, your keys found their way into ignition, then allowed you to start the engine to begin the painfully silent journey home.

You could see in your peripheral vision as she shuffled uncomfortably in her seat. Her fingers moved to fidget with the ring given to her by her father, and a pang of guilt found itself eating away at your conscience. She had done the same thing in the past. After a while, you had managed to ask her why she always touched her ring when she was under pressure, and she explained to you that she tries her hardest to speak to her father from the other side and ask for advice on how to carry on.

Knowing that, you were already feeling horrible for causing her to worry. Then, however, you remembered why you were so upset. Ever since you had grown close to Rose – and ultimately became her girlfriend – she had only become more and more protective. It was to the point where you couldn’t even have a civil conversation with anyone without her glaring daggers at them.

Most of the time, you weren’t even able to defend yourself. She insisted on doing it for you, though she never made sure you were okay with that, and that’s what annoyed you the most. You were more than capable of standing up for yourself. You had worked so hard to build your confidence and do so on your own, but she seemed to never pay any mind to it. In the past, you had quietly asked her to let you handle it, but she always managed to convince you to let her “defend you,” as she put it.

At first it was fine. She only did it with strangers when she could tell they were annoying you. As time went on, however, her aggression began to trickle into normal conversations with your friends. The subject didn’t even have to be something combative for her to step in and get defensive. The most trivial things could be deemed as threatening to her, and that always led to her pushing those friends away from you. You knew that wasn’t her intention, but it was aggravating nonetheless.

It felt like hours had passed by the time you pulled into the lot of your shared apartment with Rose, the entrances and exits guarded heavily by the same BSAA guards that had practically raised your girlfriend with the intention for her to be a bio-weapon. After the car was checked, you were allowed to park and head inside. Rose trailed after you up the stairs and watched as you wrestled the keys from your pocket to unlock the door leading into the apartment.

You stepped inside, held the door open for her, and shut and locked it once she slipped past you. Softly, she whispered your name, confused from your silence and trying to get you to say anything at all.

“What’s wrong?” She asked, her hand lifting to rest on your arm. When you shrugged her touch off, her frown deepened. Acting as though you hadn’t heard her, you dropped your bag down by the door and hardly managed to force yourself to put the keys away properly before trudging into the bedroom and sitting on your side of the bed. You made sure to face away from the door when you shifted to lie down on your side, though you could hear when she came in and stopped in the doorway.

Something had struck a chord with her, and you knew that whatever it was was because of you. Her feet carried her forward until she sat on her own part of the mattress. Barely a minute passed before you felt her hand once again squeezing your arm to gain your attention. “Was it something I said?” You scoffed and shuffled away from her touch.

Her voice broke when she spoke again, then shook after she cleared her throat. “Was it what they said to you? I told them to stop, but they didn’t want to–”

“Dammit, Rose, it wasn’t what they said, it was because of you!” You hollered, bolting upright and turning to look her in the eye. She flinched back at your sudden tone and instinctively slid her hand back up to toy with her ring. “Why did you do that?” You continued, standing up from your spot. “Do what?” The timidness had returned to her tone. She truly didn’t understand why you were so upset with her.

You huffed out a strained laugh and ran your hands down your face. “Seriously? God, okay, fine. Why did you get involved in something that had nothing to do with you? Why did you tell them to fuck off when all they had done was barely raise their voice? Why do you always do that? Why can’t you ever just let me deal with my problems on my own?”

It was her turn to stand. She stared at you, almost in a challenging manner. “You mean why do I always try to protect you? Hm, I don’t know, maybe because I have to! You weren’t doing anything about it. They were treating you like shit, and you don’t deserve that, so I was trying to fix it for you!” Again, you laughed. “Fix it? All you did was make it worse! They weren’t treating me like shit at all, and you would know that if you actually bothered to get the full story before deciding to try and step in.”

“I don’t care about whatever happened beforehand,” she retorted. “Clearly,” you grumbled. She rolled her eyes and continued. “I’m not just going to stand by and watch you get picked on!” The familiar feeling of your fingernails digging into your scalp returned as a burning sensation greeted your eyes. When you glanced back up at Rose again, she was blurry. “Oh my god, I wasn’t getting picked on! Why can’t you get that through your head? Do you not trust me? Do you really not think I’m capable of taking care of myself either way? Am I seriously that pathetic in your eyes?”

You cursed to yourself as the tears fell. “Dammit,” you blurted out, wiping furiously at your eyes and sniffling. Briefly, you looked up at Rose, and you paused. A realization had visibly dawned on her when she saw you cry, and she tensed at whatever thought was clouding her focus. Your head dropped down as you stared silently at the carpeted ground beneath your feet. Once more, her hand found itself planted on your shoulder. This time you didn’t shrug it off, and as she took notice of this, her arms instantly wrapped themselves around you to pull you close. “Don’t cry,” she mumbled, squeezing you reassuringly. “Please don’t cry. I’m sorry.”

A hiccup unwillingly slipped past your lips before you urgently tugged her further against you. “Of course I don’t think you’re pathetic,” she continued. “I know you can take care of yourself. I’ve never doubted that, and I never will. I promise I trust you.”

Just as you had done countless times before, you found yourself melting into her touch and crying onto her shoulder. The tips of her fingers grazed over the back of your neck soothingly, and ultimately you managed to even your breaths and will the tears to stop. She always knew how to calm you down, even if she had been the reason for your crying.

When she was sure you were okay, she leaned back and cupped your face in her hands. “Can you please talk to me? Tell me what’s upsetting you. I can’t help if I don’t understand how I’m hurting you.”

A weak nod was your only response at first. “I just,” you croaked out while she brushed another tear away with the pad of her thumb. “I feel so pitiful when you don’t let me stand up for myself. It’s like you don’t want me to do things on my own, and it’s so suffocating all of the time. I just wish you would let me deal with my own problems. I don’t always need someone to come swoop in and save me. I can take care of myself.

“I wish you would leave me alone sometimes.”

The thick silence returned between the two of you. Your mind had barely begun to settle when she let out a small “oh.”

You thought finally getting everything off your chest would make you feel better, but the growing tension only threw that same weight of guilt back onto your shoulders. She stepped away from you and pocketed her hands. Although her eyes were partially covered by her cap and were concentrated on a random pattern on the ground in front of her, you could still see the glossiness forming in them.

“So,” she started. “Is that it for us then? Do I need to leave for good? I-I can if you want me to.”

“No! No, god no,” you replied, pulling her back into an embrace and squeezing her as tightly against yourself as you could. “I don’t want you to leave. Please don’t leave me.”

A small turn of the head let you press a featherlike kiss to her cheek. “I just need you to let me handle my own issues alone sometimes, okay? I promise you I’ll ask you right away if I need help with anything. I just need to be able to be independent sometimes.”

Rose hummed, her fingers digging into the fabric of your shirt. “I know that,” she murmured. “But I just want to make sure you’re safe. I know you already know how to take care of yourself, but I just… I’ve never been anywhere near as close to others as I am to you, and I’m so scared of losing you. You’re all I have left.” She chuckled. “I guess I’m just worried you’re going to realize how much of a freak I am if someone who doesn’t like me starts to hate you too. And, I mean, let’s face it: none of your friends like me.

“Makes sense, to be fair. That’s why I’ve always been the outcast, you know? People don’t like me. I never really learned how relationships work because of it, so I’m really sorry if I haven’t been the girlfriend you deserve. I’ve only ever been around Chris and his team, and we’re always just picking fights with strangers who threaten us, so I guess that’s where I get it from.”

She stepped back to look you in the eye again. “I don’t know if it’s working, but I’m trying really hard to get this right. I just want to make you happy. I’m sorry that I can’t do that all the time. I’m glad you told me what was wrong.”

Swiftly, she wiped her tears from her skin before sucking in a deep breath and taking your hands into her own. “If it really would make you happy, then I’m willing to start taking a step back so you can handle your problems on your own.”  Relief, for the first time that evening, flooded through your senses at her words. A grin broke out onto your lips before you squeezed her hand. “Thank you,” you whispered. She nodded and mirrored your smile. In an instant, you were pulled into yet another hug.

“Of course.”

Her lips briefly met your shoulder in a chaste kiss before her chin landed to rest delicately against it. Nails traced random patterns against your skin, and you knew she was trying to distract her mind until she was able to calm her racing heart. After a moment, she snickered.

“Just make sure you let me know when I need to kick some ass for you, okay?”

Good Luck Charm

[Arcane] Jinx x Female Reader

Summary: Jinx has been told she's a mistake and a...well, a jinx her whole life, which is why it's such a surprise when you tell her she's your good luck charm.

Word Count: 3.09k Content Warnings: A small breakdown Category: Angst + Heavy fluff || Oneshot

[A/N]: Not proofread. Just wanted a quick break in between characters again. I couldn't stop myself from writing for this dork, especially after seeing the teaser for season two.

Enjoy!

 “Alrighty, toots, I think I’m gonna head to bed. You wanna come with, or you gonna stay up a bit longer?” You turned your head over to glance at Jinx, watching as she repeatedly turned her chair partially back and forth with her eyes fixed on you. Smiling warmly, you shrugged. “Well, I’m not tired just yet, and I wanted to finish this book,” you started, watching from the corner of your eye as she seemed to slump down at your words already. “But I can just keep reading in bed.”

Jinx stood and let out a small cheer, trotting over to you and gently taking ahold of your wrist to tug you toward the bedroom you often crashed in. Ever since you had grown close to the “loose cannon” of the undercity, things in your life had rapidly changed. It started off simple – you would spend far more time hanging out with her than anyone else. Then, as things started to develop between the two of you, you began staying the night almost every night with Jinx cuddled up against you as you slept. Even when she couldn’t sleep, you could feel her arms wrapped around your shoulders while she traced random patterns against your skin.

When Jinx had told Silco of your relationship, you feared the worst, already preparing to write your will or find a way to escape his wrath. Surprisingly, though, he was rather accepting. When you asked Jinx about it in private, she told you she believed it was because he had seen how happy she had been ever since you showed up. A few days later, her theory was confirmed when Silco had called you into his office to set rules about dealing with Jinx and her issues with trust.

He warned you that Jinx could get extremely clingy and would get overprotective of you, which you had already noticed she had begun to do, so you simply nodded. He continued to speak of things such as her hallucinations and wish to keep her past a secret. You agreed to all of the terms he had set to be with his daughter, unaware of the figure stationed above you on her usual platform. Her eyes were trained solely on you, legs swinging back and forth as she let herself rest on her stomach. With her head cradled in her palms, a wide grin made its way to her lips as you calmly agreed to take care of her.

It seemed, however, that she had done the opposite, meaning she seemed to take care of you more than the other way around. More often than not, if you were outside of her hideout, it would come across more as possessive than anything. She’d blurt out insults and impulsively pick fights with people who threatened or flirted with you.

Once they realized who they were dealing with, they backed off instantly. The few poor souls who decided to test their luck suddenly went missing, as well as Jinx for a short time, and then were never seen or heard from again. You had learned to come to terms with her reckless and apathetic behavior towards outsiders rather quickly.

“Trinket? Hello? You in there, or… did ya leave this planet?” You blinked, glancing back over at the blue-haired girl as she waved her hand in your face.

“Hm? Oh, sorry. I was just thinking about what’s going on in my book. I’m near the end, so everything is getting chaotic.” She snickered and hooked her arm around your shoulders as she led you into the bedroom. “Ah, then you’ll have to let me borrow that book sometime. You know I love a bit of chaos. Or a lot of it.” You smiled at her and rolled your eyes, playfully bumping against her and earning another chuckle.

As she plopped down to sit in her spot on the bed, she watched you silently while you flipped your book back open and sat on the other side of the mattress. Once you had leaned back against the pillows, it didn’t take long before you felt a head land gently on your shoulder. A quick look down let you know Jinx had already bundled up under the covers and shuffled over to cuddle against you for the night. With weary eyes, she peered down at the pages of your book, briefly skimming over the short excerpt of the story she could see.

Soon after, she let out a yawn and tucked her head further against your neck. “G’night, sweets. Love you.” You beamed down at her and pressed a small kiss to the top of her head. “Love you too, hun. Sleep well.”

By the time you had finally woken back up the next day, Jinx had already been up for a few hours. She hadn’t left the bed, but she was tracing patterns and words into your arms and back. When you shifted and yawned, she smiled and perked up rather quickly, sitting up in her spot and peeking down at you. Once you had rolled over to look her in the eye, her grin only grew. “Mornin’, toots. Did you sleep well?” You nodded and sat up, yawning again.

“Yeah, what about you?” She shrugged and toyed with the hem of your sleeve. “Eh, I slept okay. I got kinda restless after a while and woke up, and then I couldn’t go back to sleep.”

You nodded at her words. After a while of you trying to keep your eyes open, you felt Jinx lean against you and tug you close. “I don’t wanna leave to go work on those stupid experiments,” she confessed with a frown. “I just want to stay in here with you. I wish I could come down with you to your job instead.” With a small smirk, you raised a brow and glared over at her. “Oh? And why’s that?” She smirked back at you and slipped her hand down to lace your fingers with her own. “‘Cause I could keep you safe. I could beat up all the pervs that keep trying to get their nasty paws on you.”

A gentle chuckle escaped you as you pulled her further into your side. “Yeah, that’s what makes you my good luck charm. Nothing seems to go wrong for me when you’re near.” You had expected another teasing remark of some kind, though nothing came. Instead, you were greeted with silence. After a while of not receiving any kind of acknowledgment of what you had said, you looked down at Jinx. You blinked in surprise when you saw her gazing right back up at you, eyes filled with a concoction of emotions that couldn’t seem to even out.

Her brows furrowed together. One moment, she seemed confused, and the next, she seemed upset or in disbelief. Similarly to her eyes, her eyebrows couldn’t focus on which emotion to express.

“Uh, hun? You okay?”

“What’d you call me?”

“What?”

“What did you call me?”

You continued to stare at her, unsure of what you were supposed to say. “I called you ‘hun.’” She shook her head and lifted it from your shoulder to be eye level with you. “No, before that. What did you call me before that?” It took a moment for you to recall what you had said a mere moment ago. The confusion of the new situation had made it hard to wrack your memory. “‘My good luck charm?’”

She was silent for a few minutes, which felt like hours with how thick the tension had grown.

“You think I’m lucky? That I’m a lucky charm to you? Do you really think that?”

An uneasy smile and chuckle left your lips. “Well, yeah, of course I do. I mean, I always love being around you, and because of all you do for me, everything seems to go right when you’re around. You really are like a being of good luck to me.”

She seemed troubled at that, which certainly was not what you had expected. Tears welled up in her eyes and prompted them to grow glossy, though she fought them back. “But – no, I’m not lucky. I’m, I mean, my name is “Jinx” for goodness sake! I’m not good. I’m a horrible person. I mess everything up. How could you possibly believe that I’m a good luck charm? I don’t understand.” You felt your nerves spike, recognizing that she was at the beginning stages of another episode. “Woah, hey,” you whispered, placing a hand softly on her shoulder in an attempt to ground her back into reality before she could fly too far away from the present.

“No, I’m not lucky, I’m a Jinx. I’m the opposite of lucky – I’m unlucky. I didn’t – no, please, I’m not. No, shut up! She’s not trying to – stop it already!” Unintentionally, you leaned back, making sure to keep your hand in place. It seemed like Mylo had taken over again, throwing insult after insult at her and flooding her mind with false realities.

“Love, I’m sorry,” you murmured. “I didn’t mean to upset you.” She glared at you, eyes fixed on you in front of her, though she seemed to be staring so far away. Her eyes flickered as though she were reading some sort of script, incoherent mumbles rolling off her tongue. “No, you shouldn’t be… you didn’t – shut up! You shouldn’t be the one apologizing!”

You remained silent, waiting for the right time to chime in as Mylo continued to torment her. Although you had no idea what he was telling her, you could get a general idea based on the few words you could make out in her sputtering.

It took forever, but she ultimately calmed down, panting for breath and clutching handfuls of hair. When she came back to her senses, she found you holding both of her hands to prevent her from tearing her strands out again. Sometime in between her episode and her break into reality, she had begun copying your breathing the way you had helped her practice each time she had gone through it in the past. At length, she sighed and let her eyes bore down into her lap.

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered.

Softly, you cupped her face in your hands and lifted her head up to look her in the eye. She shifted her focus away from you, unable to meet your gaze. “It’s okay, I promise. I’m not mad.” The feeling of the pads of your thumbs grazing across her cheeks to wipe her tears away brought her a feeling of relief. Her tense shoulders drooped down after she sighed once again.

Moments passed. She finally forced herself to meet your eye. “Did you really mean it?” She whispered with a broken tone. “That you think I’m lucky?” You nodded with a weak grin. Again, tears pricked her eyes, though she leaned forward and buried her face in your shoulder before they could fall. Her arms lifted from her sides, hands grasping at the back of your shirt as she sucked in multiple shaky breaths.

“I’ve always thought you were lucky.”

Weeks had passed since you had started referring to Jinx as your good luck charm, then it shifted into months, and your list of nicknames began to grow. It became a common occurrence for her to hear you call her “lucky charm,” “charmer,” or even “bluebird.” It seemed as though you were shifting to just focus on positive nicknames instead of entirely pinpointing each play on the words “good luck charm,” though she wasn’t complaining.

She certainly wasn’t used to all of the compliments and the nice names. After all, she had been referred to as a jinx, a screwup, and essentially a burden her entire life up until she met Silco. It would take a while for her to accept what you said as truth, but she had started to come around to the loving nicknames. After a while, she even began to look forward to what you would call her for the day. She had started rubbing off on you in terms of nicknames as well. “Trinket” and “sweets” began to creep into your vocabulary, and she adored the way it sounded rolling off your tongue when it was directed at her.

Soon enough, the positivity had worn down part of her insecurity, so long as she was around you. You made her feel safe and secure, which wasn’t something she was used to either. Often, she could be seen practically bouncing down the halls with a cheesy grin plastered on her face, even if she had just left Silco’s office. Silco and Sevika had definitely taken notice of her sudden shift, and although Sevika didn’t understand why she was so much livelier than normal, Silco found himself smiling more often at the sight of Jinx when she’d suddenly remember the nickname you had chosen for her for the day.

When she’d sit up top on her makeshift platform in Silco’s office, she had to be given reminders in between meetings to settle down. Her legs would swing over the edge and kick at the air rhythmically, and her hands would pat randomly at the wooden planks.

She loved the nicknames, to put it bluntly. She absolutely adored them. Since that night, not once had you referred to her as Jinx. Somehow, even though everyone else called her by her known name, the mere mention of what you were calling her for the day gave her a boost of confidence. Whenever a mission would go wrong, she’d come straight to you to talk about it, then listen with a soft smile as you told her repeatedly how things would be okay and how she’s still your lucky charm.

With how suddenly all the flurry of names were thrown at her, she struggled to pick a favorite. Even so, her energy and overall glee grew daily, even beginning to show in her work. Weapons were crafted more cautiously, produced quicker, and had more expressive markings made by her oil crayons. Sevika didn’t enjoy the increase in enthusiasm, Silco certainly appreciated everything.

He still didn’t fully trust you, though it was growing increasingly obvious to him that you weren’t a threat, and in his eyes, you were there for a reason. You made Jinx happy, and that was all he really wanted in the end. As far as he was concerned, you had his blessing. He knew things could change, but after seeing how you treated her during every emotion she expressed, he figured that was a slim possibility.

As he sat in his office one day, he sighed and ran a hand down his face. The door had closed only a moment ago, and still he could hear the tapping and swaying above him. Leaning back in his chair, he gazed up at Jinx sitting on her small platform, biting back a small smile when he saw her grinning gleefully. “Jinx,” he called out just loud enough for her to hear. She finally turned her attention to him curiously. “Hm?”

“You know you need to be quiet when I have people in here. It’s very distracting with you shuffling around up there.” Jinx chuckled nervously. “Sorry.” He finally allowed himself to smile, catching Sevika off guard from her spot on the sofa. “Why don’t you spend the rest of the day with [Y/N]? You’ve earned a break, both of you.”

Instantly, Jinx dropped from her spot above and landed on Silco’s desk. She crouched down and looked him in the eye. “Really? You’re okay with that?” He nodded. “So long as you two don’t cause any major problems,” he added. She beamed brightly at his words and her eyes lit up. “Thanks!” Within an instant, she turned on her heel and hopped off the desk, already out the door and skipping down the hall to find you.

Silco grinned softly with a small shake of his head. He leaned forward again and motioned for Sevika to shut the door as he picked up a few papers to straighten them.

When Sevika returned to her spot on the sofa, she huffed out a heavy sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. She bit her tongue with what she wanted to say, but a look of warning from Silco made her waver. “What are you breathing so heavily for?” She waited, trying to rephrase her words before speaking them, but ultimately gave up.

“It’s nothing against either of you. I’ve just never seen her this energetic before, and I’ve seen her get energetic in the past.” To her relief, Silco hummed and smiled. “Yes, she’s certainly been in a better mood as of lately. It’s refreshing, in a way.”

Sevika waited momentarily, unsure of what to say. “You think that girl is the reason she’s been so cheery?” “I know she is. Her name is [Y/N]. She’s known Jinx for a couple of years now, and the two of them have grown quite close in such a short amount of time. I don’t entirely approve of that girl, but Jinx has taken a liking to her, and I’d be a fool to take that away from her.”

Even with her disliking of  the blue-haired girl, Sevika couldn’t help but grin at his words. “Yeah, it is nice to see she’s stable with someone. I was worried she’d drive someone away. [Y/N], was it? She’s patient, and that’s definitely good for someone like Jinx. To be honest, I’m glad they met.”

“Yes, I am as well. I suppose I should include a few of the names [Y/N] has been using to refer to Jinx as when speaking to her. It seems to put her in a better mood, as you’ve said, and I’ve noticed an improvement in her crafts and missions.” A chuckle slipped from Sevika before she could stop it. “Yeah, she hasn’t screwed up another task in a while.”

“Pardon?”

Sevika swallowed and cleared her throat. “Sorry, sir. It was nothing.”

All the while, as they chatted away about her improvement, Jinx trailed down the hallway and all the way to her hideout. When she saw you there, sitting comfortably by her desk in the extra chair she had pulled into the room to have you nearby while she worked, she couldn’t help the smile that stretched across her lips from ear to ear. As she grew closer, she wondered what you would refer to her as that day.

Here For You

[Until Dawn] Samantha Giddings x Female Reader

Word Count: 4.4k

Proofread: Yes

Content Warnings: Mentions of war, PTSD, death, strong language

[A/N]: I haven't seen many stories for Sam with a female reader, so I figured I could add on to what already exists! For context: I do struggle with PTSD myself, so I know some of the effects, but mine isn't from war, meaning I'm not sure how accurate my representation of it is in this story. Also, this was written on 11-22-2022, so it's been a while since I've read over this.

Enjoy!

“Shit. I don’t know, Mike. We just got back from war for god’s sake! I don’t want to add on to her worries. Maybe I shouldn’t do this after all,” Sam ranted over the phone, her grip tightening on the steering wheel as her anxiety skyrocketed. Mike sighed on the other side. “Sam, buddy, you’ve gotta calm down. I’m sure she feels the same way. Sure, I’ve never met her, but you talk about her so much, and it seems like she’ll feel the same way. And even if she doesn’t, I can promise you it won’t add on to her worries. Just go for it! You’ll feel better if you get it done. I don’t want you to regret not asking her out.”

As she came to a red light, Sam eased on the brake to bring her car to a stop. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose before running her fingers through her loose strands of hair. Her hazel eyes flickered around in front of her, seemingly staring at nothing as her mind raced. At length, she let out another sigh and shut her eyes tight. “You’re right. You’re right, okay? I’ll do it–I’ll tell her how I feel.” Her friend chuckled. “Good.” Sam smiled for a moment, but it quickly faltered before dropping. “Ugh, but what if she doesn’t feel the same way? What if I make her uncomfortable, and she doesn’t want to be friends anymore?” Mike groaned. Sam could hear him scratching hard at his head.

“Sam, I can’t tell you what she’ll say when you confess, but it doesn’t seem like she’d be the type to stop hanging out with you over something like this. Not from how you’ve described her, anyway. Just…when the time seems right, tell her how you feel. Let her know what you love about her–specific things–and then tell her that you love her entirely.” “Yeah, but what if–” “You’re an incredible woman, Sam. I don’t see why she wouldn’t share your feelings. And hey, I thought you were supposed to be the calm, level headed one. I’ve never seen you get this anxious over something before. Not when you were applying to college. Not even when you enlisted for the army and got shipped off to war! You’re tough, Sam. You’ve gotta get your nerves under control so you don’t blow this.”

Sam rolled her eyes at his “level headed” comment, though she couldn’t bite back her smirk. She was so grateful for Mike–he truly was like an older brother to her. “Yeah yeah, okay. I’ll calm down before I say anything. Thank you, Mike.” “No problemo. Let me know how it goes afterwards, alright? I wanna have proof that I’m the ultimate wingman.” The blonde laughed softly and glanced up at the streetlight as it turned green. She eased her foot onto the accelerator and began driving forwards again. “Will do. Bye, Mike.” “Bye.”

Sam continued driving after turning her phone off and gently tossing it into her passenger seat. She sucked in a deep breath in an attempt to steel her nerves. “It’ll be alright. [Y/N] likes you. Maybe not the way you like her, but she still likes you. She won’t stop hanging out with you just because she might not feel the same way–just like Mike said. Just…calm down. You just got back from a war. So has [Y/N]. It’s not like this will be the most terrifying thing you ever have to do.” She managed to calm herself momentarily, but as she rounded the corner that led to the cafe she had agreed to meet [Y/N] at, her anxiety spiked. It was hard not to give in to her overwhelming thoughts.

Once she pulled to the side of the road and stepped out of her car, first grabbing her phone from the seat beside her, she clicked on [Y/N]’s contact and sent her a quick message to let her know she had made it. She went inside just as her phone buzzed in her hand. ‘I know. I’m across the room from you, silly.’ Sam looked up from her phone to find the [h/c] girl standing in line at the register, smiling and waving at her. The blonde grinned nervously and waved back before joining her in line. They hugged each other tightly, so relieved to see each other again.

When the war had gotten worse and they were sent to fight in it, they were shipped off to separate locations without any contact. It drove them insane not being able to know if the other was okay. Finally, after they were sent home, they immediately called each other and were relieved to hear each other’s voice. Knowing that they were both okay allowed them to finally get the rest they desperately needed. After sleeping for about a day and a half, Sam asked [Y/N] if she’d want to meet up so they could talk. The [h/c] girl agreed instantly, and they chose to go to the cafe closest to where they lived. For Sam, it was only an eight minute drive. For [Y/N], however, it took twenty.

Sam figured the girl had left much earlier than she needed to so she wouldn’t be late. She couldn’t have arrived much sooner than she had. She smiled and sighed, finally stepping back from the embrace to look [Y/N] in the eyes. Oh, those beautiful [e/c] eyes. So captivating and gentle. She always found herself getting lost in a trance as she stared into them. All those late nights in their shared bunk, talking about plans for upcoming missions, gossipping about their fellow soldiers, softly whispering kind words and risque secrets. She cherished those nights.

Those nights were partly the reason she fell so hard for the girl so quickly.

“Sam? You’re doing it again,” [Y/N] said suddenly, waving her hand in front of the blonde’s face. Sam blinked and felt the heat rising to her cheeks. “Huh? Oh, uh…sorry. Zoned out.” The girl in front of her giggled, making her heart flutter. “You do that a lot.” She nodded and scratched the back of her neck, silently thankful that they had to step forward in line so she could hide her face by looking ahead momentarily. “Yeah, my bad. My mind just kind of…wanders.” [Y/N]’s eyebrows popped upwards as she tilted her head to the side in curiosity. “Really? Where to?” The crimson red once again warmed her face at the girl’s question. “N-Nowhere. It’s…embarrassing.”

[Y/N] smirked and nodded. “Fair enough. I’m just curious though. Why does your mind only seem to wander when you’re staring at me? I’ve never seen you zone out around anyone else.” Sam choked on the air she tried to breathe in, startled by the fact [Y/N] had caught on to her situation. The girl laughed. “Don’t worry, Sammy, I’m just teasing.” Sam looked down and used her hand to cover her face as she took a deep breath. When she felt her face was back to its original color, she lowered her hand back down to her side. They stepped forward again when it was their turn to order. “I’d like a medium vanilla frappe.” The barista behind the register nodded with a smile, wrote the order down on the cup, then turned to Sam. “And for you, miss?” “Uh, just a small green tea please.” “Alright. Can I get a name for the order?”

Sam and [Y/N] looked at each other, silently communicating before turning back to the barista. “Samantha G.” The barista nodded and typed the name up on her register. “That’ll be $8.03.” At that, both Sam and [Y/N] reached into their pockets for their wallets. They looked at each other. “Oh, it’s alright, [Y/N]. I’m fine with paying.” [Y/N] smiled softly. “You don’t have to, Sam. I don’t mind paying this time.” “Nah, I got it. You can pay next time.” The [h/c] girl blushed faintly. “O-Oh. Uh, yeah, of course.” [Y/N] put her wallet away as Sam handed the barista her card. She returned it to the blonde shortly after scanning it and handing her the receipt. “We’ll call when it’s ready.” Sam nodded.

“Thanks,” she mumbled loud enough for the employee to hear. She headed over to a table near the back of the room, [Y/N] trailing closely behind her. They sat down across from each other and smiled. Both tried to think of something to say, but couldn’t, so they looked away instead and blushed. Sam’s mind screamed at her to say something–anything–to break the silence. Finally, she cleared her throat. “S-So, uh…did your mission go well?” The [h/c] girl looked over at her. “Hm? Oh, yeah. It was…successful, in terms of the goal, but…” The girl fell silent. Sam raised an eyebrow. “But…?” [Y/N] sighed, averting her gaze to stare at the table in front of her. She began to pick at her nails.

“We just…I saw so many of my friends die, Sam. So many men and women didn’t get to come home to their loved ones. They never get to see their friends or families again. How can I consider that a success?” Sam frowned, her heart breaking as she saw tears forming in [Y/N]’s eyes. Hesitantly, she reached across the table and grabbed the girl’s trembling hand. She caressed the back of it with her thumb. “I know what you mean. I can’t tell you how many people I saw die in a single day. I see their faces every time I close my eyes. I spoke to my therapist about it, and she said it sounds like Post-Traumatic-Stress-Disorder. It’s really common with soldiers, even if they haven’t seen battle in person, so it doesn’t surprise me that we both might have it.”

“Yeah, my dad warned me about that. I’d heard about it multiple times throughout school, but I never knew how horrible it really is. I wish there was a way I could forget about everything I witnessed. All this stress is making me worry about my future.” “I know. It’s going to take some time, and by that, I mean years, but we’ll get through it, okay? I promise. Yes, we both have therapists who can help us find healthy ways to cope, but we also have each other. We both know the general idea of what we saw, so we have true sympathy for our situation. We aren’t alone in this. I’m here for you.” [Y/N] smiled weakly, though it dropped. “I know. I’m just…I’m scared, Sam.” Sam tilted her head. “Of what?”

“I’ve heard so many stories–I’ve seen it multiple times! How people with PTSD snap at the smallest things and end up driving away the people they love. I don’t want that to happen.” Sam sighed softly, her own hand beginning to tremble. “I can’t promise that we won’t lose control sometimes. Trauma makes you do scary things–it gives you horrible thoughts and overrides your emotions. It can make you lose sight of what’s logical. It’s terrifying, but there are ways to cope with it. Therapy and talking with people who understand it are two of those ways. It’s going to take years. I know that’s terrible to think about, but it’s true. You won’t be alone during those years, I can promise you that. I’m here, your therapist is here, and everyone else is too: Emily, Jessica, Matt, Mike, Chris, Ashley–all of us. We’re here.”

[Y/N] smiled genuinely at Sam, who returned it with her own small grin. They gazed into each other’s eyes, visibly refraining from telling each other something. Sam took in a shaky breath to ease her anxiety. She took note of how warm [Y/N]’s hand felt in her own–how soft her skin felt against her own. She recalled how warm the girl’s body felt when they had hugged earlier in line. She smiled. “[Y/N], can I be honest with you?” The [h/c] girl nodded, a spark of interest flickering in her eyes. “Of course.” Sam parted her lips to speak. “I wanted to t–”

“Samantha G, your order is ready!”

Both women jumped at the sudden holler, looking over to the register where the barista from before had placed their drinks. Sam sighed, her heart pounding in her ears. She turned back to [Y/N]. “I-I, uh…I guess I’ll be right back.” [Y/N] smiled nervously and nodded. The blonde then stood and walked to the counter, picking up the drinks before spinning on her heel to head back to the table. She sucked in a breath, cursing under her breath at how stupid she was for trying to confess at a time like that. She deliberately slowed her steps so she wouldn’t have to face [Y/N] again so soon, but because of the small size of the cafe, it only took her a few seconds to make it back. She sat down and handed the drink over, instantly taking a sip of her own to avoid eye contact.

“What were you saying?” Sam put her drink down and cleared her throat. “Uh, nothing. It’s not important.” [Y/N] frowned. “Alright…” They sat in silence, the only background noise the surrounding chatter of the tables nearby and the occasional sip they alternated between taking. After a few minutes, Sam’s phone buzzed in her pocket. She pulled it out and clicked on the notification. Mike had texted, asking if she had confessed yet. She sighed. ‘No, I can’t do it. Not now. I think we still need time before either one of us is ready.’ Mike sent back a frowny face, but agreed that she should wait. ‘You should still tell her how you feel though. That way she knows she can come to you when she’s ready.’ Sam rolled her eyes. ‘Fine. But I’m not telling her now. I’ll tell her some other time.’

She pocketed her phone with a huff and finished off the last of her drink. She stood and walked to a trash can, tossed her empty cup inside, and stepped back over to the table. She put her fidgety hands into her pockets and stood beside [Y/N], who looked up at her with an unreadable expression. “Why don’t we get out of here? I think it would be best to get some fresh air and talk about something else until we’re comfortable.” The girl still sitting nodded and stood up as well, following Sam as they both headed out the door. They got into the blonde’s car, and as they were buckling up, Sam paused her movements, making the [h/c] girl look over at her in confusion. “What’s wrong?”

“Didn’t you drive here?” “Oh, yeah. I guess you can just drop me off here after we’re done hanging out. That way I can take my car home.” Sam nodded and started the engine, merging into the street once the upcoming traffic cleared. They sat in silence for a while, not sure what to say. Finally, as [Y/N] realized Sam hadn’t specified where she was going, she turned to her. “Where were you wanting to go? I’m not really sure of any store or mall that isn’t packed at this time.” Sam hummed, the gears in her mind turning as she kept her eyes on the road ahead. “I guess we can go walk around at the park near my place. Would that be alright?”

“Yeah, anything is fine. I just want to get my mind off of what we were talking about for a little bit.” Sam nodded, but they went completely silent after that. They drove for a few more short minutes, though it felt like an eternity to the both of them. Once they finally pulled up to the side of the road, they got out. [Y/N] stood near the hood of the car as she waited for Sam to join her after locking the car. They linked up and walked over to the red track that trailed along the edge of the park, standing a more-than-reasonable distance away from each other. Sam looked around at the other people walking around while [Y/N] stared down at her phone, mindlessly scrolling through posts on her feed.

Sam’s previously tense gaze softened as it landed on a group of small children laughing and running as their parents chased them with bright smiles. A small smile of its own made its way to her lips as she looked over at [Y/N]. “Hey, have you ever thought of having a family of your own? Y’know, once you’re ready?” The [h/c] girl looked up, surprised at the sudden question. She shrugged. “Oh, uh…I guess so. Every once in a while, yeah, but I really want to find the right person first before I even think of starting a family.” Sam nodded. “Ah, yeah, that’s a good idea. But a family doesn’t necessarily mean having children. It could mean having nieces, nephews, or a pet, or even just having a partner. There’s no real definition of what a family has to be.”

[Y/N] smiled. “That’s a nice way to look at it.” They shared a smile, finally making eye contact for the first time since they left the cafe. “What about you?” “Hm?” “Have you ever thought about starting a family when you’re ready?” Sam blushed. “Oh. Yeah, I have.” “Anyone specific in mind?” The blonde’s blush deepened. “Y-Yes.” [Y/N] suddenly smirked, pocketing her phone as she stepped closer and leaned in a bit to the side. “Oh? Who?” Sam looked away. “No one. I don’t wanna say.” “C’mon, Sammy, you can tell me. I’m the same one you shared all those secrets with back in our bunk.” Sam sighed after a moment and looked down at her feet, unable to wipe the smile from her face. “I-I can’t share any names, but…it’s this girl.”

“Yeah? Tell me about her! Maybe I could find a way to get you two together.” ‘Oh, the irony,’ Sam thought to herself. “She’s just…perfect in my eyes. She’s kind, beautiful, selfless, strong, and just…incredible. I wish I could tell her how I feel. She means the world to me. I could go on and on for hours about how much I love her. I can’t picture a life ahead without her in it–I don’t want to picture one without her in it either. Even if she doesn’t feel the same, I still want to be there for her–to make her happy and feel loved like she deserves.” [Y/N]’s smile seemed forced, not quite reaching her eyes. “Oh, it sounds like you really love her a lot!” “Yeah, I do. How would you confess?” “Me?” “Yeah. If you were in my shoes, what would you do or say to her to let her know how I feel?”

[Y/N] looked ahead, not really looking at anything in particular. “Hm…Well, I’d probably take her to a nice place where we’d be alone, and then start talking to her about what I love most about her. Then, if she doesn’t seem uncomfortable, I’d tell her how I feel.” Sam nodded, making a mental note. “That’s not a bad plan at all. Maybe I’ll follow through with it. I could do it tonight, actually.” “Oh, do I need to leave at a certain time so you’re alone?” “No, it’s fine. We’ll figure it out.” “Alright.”

They continued walking, Sam seeming to lead the conversation afterwards as [Y/N] gave increasingly shorter answers. Finally, after about an hour and a half of walking, they headed back. Sam drove them to her apartment instead of the cafe, confusing the [h/c] girl. She turned to ask her where they were, but the blonde had already gotten out of the car and headed to the front of the building. [Y/N] stepped out and shut the door. Sam turned to her and motioned for her to come over. “C’mon! I wanna hang out with you for a bit longer. Unless you’re busy?” “Oh, no, not at all.”

Sam nodded, and they headed inside. They stepped into the elevator as the blonde pressed her floor. They made it up in a few short moments and headed down the overly long hallway. Finally, just as [Y/N] was getting ready to ask how much further they would have to walk, Sam turned and pulled her keys out from her pocket, unlocking the door in front of her and pushing it open to step inside. [Y/N] followed after her. Sam closed and locked the door behind her once they were both inside. “Go ahead and make yourself comfortable in the living room. I’m just gonna change into something a little more cozy.” “Alright.”

Sam headed into her room off to the side, closing the door behind her and locking it before quickly grabbing her phone. She shot Mike a text in a panic. ‘She’s in my apartment rn, what the hell do I do??’ Mike didn’t take long to respond. ‘Nice!! Shoot your shot and tell her how you feel!’ Sam groaned, tossing her phone onto her bed and heading to her closet. She grabbed a slightly oversized t-shirt and some sweatpants. She changed into them quickly and sat on the edge of her mattress, holding her head in her hands as her mind raced. ‘Just tell her how you feel. Make her feel safe, so that even if she doesn’t feel the same, she knows it’s okay to reject you and leave. Don’t be pushy.’

She stood and grabbed her phone. She stepped over to her door and unlocked it, though she didn’t make any move to actually twist the doorknob and open it. ‘Breathe, and just tell her how you feel.’ She finally opened the door and headed over to the couch, joining [Y/N] as she sat down on the opposite side. They smiled nervously at each other before looking away. Sam’s phone buzzed in her hand, making her look down at it. Mike texted again, giving her a few words of encouragement. The blonde smiled with a soft sigh and looked over at [Y/N], who was toying with her fingers. “Hey, so…about earlier–when I asked about starting a family. There was actually a reason I brought that up.”

[Y/N] turned to her, now intrigued. “Yeah? What is it?” “You know those things I said about that girl I like?” She nodded. “I’m not sure if I made it obvious about who I was talking about, but could you kind of get a hint as to who I was referring to?” [Y/N] looked to the side as she thought to herself. “Uh…no, actually. I don’t really know anyone that we didn’t both meet during training, and from what I could tell, you didn’t really care for anyone there since they were all really rude at first.” Sam chuckled. “Yeah, until they got scolded multiple times, they were honestly pretty annoying. I tried pretty damn hard to stay calm around them, but they made it so difficult.” [Y/N] laughed with her this time. “Yeah. Kinda reminds me of boot camp.”

Sam nodded, both women smiling warmly at each other. Suddenly feeling the urge to be closer, the blonde scooted towards [Y/N], who didn’t seem to mind in the slightest. “Well, the girl I was talking about, I actually did meet her during training.” The girl’s eyes brightened, seeming hopeful. “R-Really?” “Yeah. All those things I said about her were true. I don’t want to picture my life without her in it.” Sam’s smile widened. “I don’t want to picture my life without you in it, [Y/N]. Even if you don’t feel the same about me, I want you to know that I’ll always be here for you–trying everything I can to make you happy. You deserve the world, and I want to try to give that to you.”

[Y/N] stared at her in shock, her face bright red as she fumbled nervously with her shirt. Sam’s eyebrows furrowed a bit after a moment of no response, her confidence crumbling. “Is…Is everything alright? I didn’t make you uncomfortable, did I?” [Y/N] blinked. “Huh? O-Oh, no! Not at all! I just didn’t expect you to feel the same way about me that I feel about you.” It was Sam’s turn to blush this time. “You feel the same way about me?” [Y/N] nodded. They smiled wildly at each other, overwhelmed with both joy and relief at the realization that they felt the same way about each other. Sam scooted closer, tenderly taking [Y/N]’s hand into her own. “So…what does this mean? What are we?”

The [h/c] girl shrugged after a moment, her smile never faltering. “I’m not sure, honestly. I really do love you, Sam, I’m just scared.” Sam tilted her head. “Scared? Of what?” “Of being in a relationship so soon after making it home. I’m worried I’ll be too anxious or stressed to play my part in a relationship like this. I just…I need time. I promise you, we will date–my heart belongs to you, but I’m just going to need a bit of time to figure things out. Maybe once I find good ways to cope with what happened, I’ll be ready.” She looked up at the blonde, expecting her to be upset. To her relief, Sam was still smiling as wide as before. She nodded and squeezed her hand.

“I agree. I think I need a bit of time as well. I’m just so relieved to know you feel the same way.” They stared at each other for a moment longer. At length, [Y/N] suddenly leaned forward and pulled Sam into one of those warm hugs she was so in love with. She froze, but quickly melted into the embrace and held her back just as tight, inhaling her scent and closing her eyes. “I’m so glad I met you, Sam,” [Y/N] whispered softly. Sam felt her smile grow wider as she buried her face into the girl’s hair. She held her tighter. “I’m glad I met you too. I love you so much.” [Y/N] didn’t respond for a moment, making Sam worry that she had said it too soon. Her worries were washed away, however, as [Y/N] chuckled through a sob. Before Sam could ask what was wrong, a soft, “I love you too,” came from the girl’s lips. They stayed there for several long moments, swaying side to side slightly as they enjoyed each other’s presence and warmth.

Finally, they leaned back and gazed into each other’s eyes. [Y/N] had been crying, but Sam could tell it was from joy instead of pain. She grinned, softly wiping her tears away. “Everything will be okay, [Y/N]. I promise you. I’m here for you.”

Headcanons

[BATIM/BATDR] Allison Angel x Female Reader x Alice Angel

Summary: General and romantic headcanons I have about the two main angels in the franchise.

Word Count: 3.54k Content Warnings: Soft mentions of insecurity Category: Fluff + Slight angst

[A/N]: Only a few more characters left, then I'll post my master list and rules for requests. Thank you to everyone who has sent in a request so far!

Enjoy!

Allison

General

Generally one of the kindest, most patient people you’re ever going to meet, especially down in the studio

Her temper hardly ever flares up, but there are moments where she’ll act out of pure fear or anger

Even so, it’ll still be hard to tell how furious she is, considering she hardly ever raises her voice outside of battle

It’s just much harder to see the impatient side of her

She tends to be more logical, wanting to think things all the way through, and she is sure to get others to share their perspective of a situation before she makes a plan

After all she’s witnessed throughout her time at the studio, it’s understandable that she’s cautious of every lurking shadow and newcomer

She’ll welcome others if she feels they aren’t a threat, but still tends to keep an escape route pinned in the back of her mind in case things take a turn (as they have in the past)

She and Tom will both head out together most of the time to gather supplies that they can bring to their safehouse

While together, she feels a bit calmer knowing they have each other’s backs

Whenever she’s wandering around alone, however, she constantly feels on edge about whether or not the Ink Demon will come stampeding toward her

On top of this, she worries that Tom won’t be there when she gets back, or that he won’t be in one piece if he is

Helps whoever she can, even if that means putting herself at risk to save them from the cruelty of the studio, such as the Ink Demon, Alice, and the Projectionist

She’ll only put herself at risk for others if she deems them more important than herself, meaning a loved one (such as Tom or someone she took under her wing)

In the darker spaces of the studio, she’ll find blank spaces on the walls or floors and write messages for the Lost Ones who roam around, hoping to provide some sense of hope for them

Tinkers around with any gadget or scraps she can find, typically to create artificial limbs for those she trusts–an example being the animatronic arm she repurposed for Tom to use after he lost his own

Plays off any injury she gets as minor, no matter how severe it actually is, because she doesn’t want to worry others

She doesn’t mind getting help for what she’s endured, but she wants to ensure everyone else is safe first before she tries to scavenge for what she needs

On constant alert when outside of the safehouse, even if she has reinforcements

Sleep doesn’t come easy in the studio, especially to those who know what dangers threaten each wrong turn, so when she isn’t able to rest, Allison will try to find a way to make herself useful

Generally uses this time to count the stock in their storage, feed the fish, scribble out quick lists of plans she has for material, etc.

Always makes sure to let Tom know where she’s headed before she leaves

Actively searches out Lost Ones who need some sort of aid, making sure to keep a can of bacon soup nearby at all times in case it’s needed

Although there are more people in the studio that she trusts aside from Tom, she still is very strict about who she’ll let into the safehouse

The last thing she wants is to be responsible for the death of Tom or herself simply because she was too trusting toward a stranger

Overall, she’s a patient, kindhearted woman who wants to help others in any way she can, but her years in the studio have hardened her into a survivor, leaving her wary of every deadly possibility that may come her way

Romantic

It takes a while for Allison to trust you, considering all that she’s been through. However, the moment she sees you helping someone escape a situation, or she sees you patching a stranger up and handing them provisions, the tension in her body starts to ease up

Once she trusts you enough, she’ll start noticing your interests and hobbies, and she’ll partake in some of them herself if she can

After a while of growing closer to you and learning that she can trust you fully, she’ll either find that she fancies you, or she’ll notice that you like her first with ease

Either way, she’ll most likely take initiative when it comes to confessing and asking the other out

She likes being upfront and honest, especially with those she loves, so she’ll be relatively blunt about how she feels

She’ll take you somewhere that’s special to the both of you, reveal a small setup she made beforehand, and spend time talking with you before she finally confesses

Compared to most, she’s alright with being rejected–things don’t come easy (or at all), and she’s willing to accept that

As she expresses how she feels, there’s a small sense of anxiety creeping in through her words. She hadn’t confessed to anyone since being rebirthed. She stays calm and confident however, so it’s hard to even pick up on the fact that her hands are trembling and there are small beads of sweat forming on the back of her neck

When you tell her you feel the same way and agree to be her girlfriend, she’s relieved more than anything

She’ll spend more time with you in that space for a while before she walks you back to the safehouse to crash for the night

After the relationship had been established, Allison finally got more bold with a few of her motions

With a little bit of patience, she starts growing more comfortable and confident with being your partner, often finding herself resorting to coming to you for comfort and advice instead of Tom

She’ll, of course, be there for you in all of those ways as well

Dates are sometimes hard to initiate in the studio due to the danger, so she’ll make do with what she has

By this, it means she’ll wait until she knows Tom will be out of the safehouse for a while on a supply run. When he’s gone, she’ll bring out a couple of candles, a radio, and gather a few plates with food she had found–thankful that she managed to find something other than bacon soup

You’ll spend the day together at the table, eating what she prepared, playing cards, and just chatting away about whatever comes to mind

After peace finally settled over the studio (after Audrey helped rewrite what happens during the cycle), dates become more frequent and are out in better spaces in the studio, no longer having to worry about the Ink Demon appearing and ruining everything

Although the small city in the middle of the studio is abandoned, Allison will take you there often, carrying a radio with her to set up

She had–with the help of Tom–pushed a few of the cars to the sides of the street, providing an open space in the middle

There, she’ll place down the radio she brings and tune it to a slower song. She’ll then pull you into the large opening and slow dance with you for a while, complimenting you left and right as she leads

She enjoys doing anything and everything with you that she can

Any hobbies that you’ve shown interest in become a pair-hobby

She’ll sit / stand beside you as you paint, sculpt, read, play an instrument, etc., and she’ll be doing the same, essentially mirroring you peacefully at your side

If she can’t participate in your hobbies somehow, she’ll at least show that she takes interest in it, never making you feel dumb for what you enjoy

When settling down for the night, she’s not opposed to bundling up together in bed, surprised at herself for finding any cuddling position comfortable

Regardless of how you sleep, she’ll ensure that she’s holding you in some way

This stems from trauma and experience before the Ink Demon was tamed, though now it’s more of a comfort thing than a protection thing

If you don’t feel like being touched too much, she’ll hold your hand or keep her hand on your shoulder as you sleep

If you’re the opposite, she’ll let you latch onto her like a koala, or she’ll even do it herself if the day had been particularly demanding for her

She just wants to be close to you, regardless of the fact the studio is much safer now

A way for her to be close to you is by giving you some sort of jewelry

After a while of her experimenting with necklaces and bracelets made of scraps she polished and welded, she finally takes a few measurements and brings you to the place she confessed to you at

There, you’ll find a similar setup to before, and things will run smoothly

After a while of dancing together and talking about what the future will look like, she’ll segway into her speech and drop onto her knee, pulling out a ring from her satchel

When you say yes to marrying her, she doesn’t hesitate to slip the ring on your finger and pull you in for a kiss, overjoyed of the outcome

A small wedding, if you’re comfortable with it, is held shortly after, and her vows are heartwarming: she expresses her constant admiration and appreciation for you walking into her life, promising to always be there for you no matter what, slightly whispering by the time she gets to her statement of how she hopes she’s been half the girlfriend to you that you’ve been to her. Her voice manages to crack slightly at the end, and she’s fighting back the tears, wanting to save them for after the kiss

After the wedding, she somehow finds herself growing even closer to you than before, and things finally seem to fall into place for her

Overall, she’s a loving, understanding, patient partner who wants to be there for you in every possible way. She’ll show interest in your own hobbies, partaking in them herself most of the time, and she’s constantly trying to find a way to make time spent alone together more special. Dates, even before the Ink Demon has been disposed of as a threat, are heartfelt and meaningful, each small act one of intimacy and adoration. She makes time for you, and she always takes your opinions into consideration before making a final decision. With her, you’ll feel safe, understood, and never judged for who you are

Malice

General

Contrary to Allison, Malice–or Susie–tends to be more hotheaded

It’s not hard to upset her, though if she trusts you enough, it’ll sort of be easier to calm her back down

Extremely paranoid of newcomers, and even of those she’s known for decades

Terrified of stumbling across the Ink Demon, so she’ll end up sending any poor soul she’s fortunate to come across on an errand run, promising to send them home as a thank you when they’re done

It’s hard to gain her trust. In her mind, everyone in the studio is out to get her, and she’ll do whatever she can to keep herself safe

When she does have to scavenge for supplies on her own, she keeps a weapon handy at all times, whether it be her tommy gun or a Gent pipe

In what she calls her sanctuary, any mirror that can be found has either been shattered or covered with a thick cloth

The only place a still in-tact mirror can be found is her workshop, where she uses her twisted devices to torture and experiment on the corrupted members of the Butcher Gang

She keeps the mirror there to check how the experiments of harvesting and digesting organs is affecting her physical form

Each time she sees the tattered side of her face, still ripped open and taunting her, she has to will everything in herself not to smash everything in her sight, instead trying to focus on repairing her equipment and scanning across the monitors for the cameras she has set up around the studio

Tends to target creatures that come out “perfect,” meaning she’ll spare the Lost Ones and Searchers if they don’t get in her way

In her room, she keeps a record of her experiments and studies on the anatomy of whatever she can get her hands on

Emptied out the bookshelf closest to the sofa she sleeps on to store her journals and notes

Selfish beyond belief–she refuses to actively help others on her own volition, even if they’re at her feet begging

In order to keep herself safe, she went on a rampage during her first few years after being rebirthed, making a point to others that she’s one to be feared

This worked well, allowing her to isolate herself and focus on perfecting her injections, though it also caused issues with her sanity

Can often be heard shrieking at herself, almost like she’s arguing with herself about whatever has crawled under her skin in the moment

Although she appreciates feeling safe in her solitude, she aches for someone to help her with her dream of one day becoming beautiful again–someone who won’t look at her with terror or hatred

Self-sabotages any kind of trust she has with someone, too worried they’ll double-cross her and she’ll wind up at the mercy of the Ink Demon again

Ultimately, a very paranoid, insecure woman who longs to find herself again. She buries herself in work to distract herself from the reality of what would haunt her mind if she acknowledged it, specifically the abominations that meander through the levels of the studio

Romantic

It takes forever to fully gain her trust enough for her to actually fall for you

After all she had bared witness to in her time down in the studio, it’s hard to blame her for being paranoid about new people around the area

If you somehow manage to stay on her good side and gain her trust, however, she’ll cling to you

In her eyes, you’re the only light left in her dull life down in the inky depths of the very place that made her the way she is

For a while, she’ll keep you hidden in the furthest corner of her safety zone on Level Nine, terrified she’s going to lose the one good thing still left in her life

With a lot of convincing (and the promise made to always carry around a weapon), Malice will finally let you wander around more and more. It’ll start off with her attached at your hip and walking with you everywhere, then slowly shift to her watching you from her cameras

Even when she knows you’ll be safe out in the places you choose to go, she’ll still keep an eye on her monitors here and there to make sure there isn’t anything weird lurking nearby

One way to make her trust you is to promise to help her on her journey to recover her beauty (and sanity)

More often than not, you’ll find her hidden away somewhere in her sanctuary, sobbing and curled up on the ground as she desperately tries to hide her face from you

You’ll have to comfort her when she gets that way

One thing that makes her melt during her swings of insecurity is when you hold her close and caress her face, especially if you cup the tattered side just as tenderly as the part that’s still in-tact

Gaze at her without any sense of fear or discomfort, and she’ll break, weeping against you after she drops her head against one of your shoulders, her hands clutching at your shirt to try and pull you closer

If you work with her enough, she’ll start to grow a little more comfortable with how she looks. She’ll still have breakdowns and moments where she wants to be alone, but she’ll come around to you sooner or later

Will absolutely gawk at you with hearts in her eyes if you protect her from the creatures threatening to attack when you both go out to scavenge for supplies. Bonus points if you help her in her lab with dissecting the Butcher Gang’s organs

Since she’s managed to keep Level Nine relatively safe from the Ink Demon, there’s a wider amount of space for her to bring you for dates

During these moments alone in random parts of her sanctuary, she’ll feel safe enough to show her vulnerabilities, showing you the torn part of her face without trying to hide behind her hair or turn away

She’ll express that she’s worried about the future, wondering if she’ll ever manage to perfect her experiments and fix her face

Comfort her when she talks about those insecurities, and she’ll practically swoon, melting under your touch and leaning into it as she scoots closer

One of the main things about being with her is she needs constant reassurance that you love her and aren’t afraid of her

It’s hard for her to trust anyone, and when she finally fully trusts you, she wants to do everything she can to keep you in her life, even if it means resorting to selfish means. It’s not necessarily her fault for being so possessive, but you’ll eventually have to convince her to work on it when it gets to be too much

Even after things settle down when Audrey shows up, she’s still be worried about you leaving certain parts of the studio that she can’t access with her cameras, and she’ll come with you for a while

Eventually, she’ll realize she isn’t in constant danger anymore and will let you wander off on your own, so long as you promise you’ll be back soon

She may not participate in your hobbies the way Allison would, but she’ll certainly show curiosity and interest in them. If they’re more on the scientific side, she may join you here and there to learn more about them

At home at night, she almost always needs to be holding you when asleep. More likely than not, she’ll spoon you from behind or just hold you against her chest, keeping one hand next to yours at all times

It’s hard for her to sleep half of the time, so even if you manage to get her to crash for a bit, it won’t be long before you feel her toying with your hair or shirt to keep herself distracted after waking up

She doesn’t want to wake you up just because she’s getting antsy, which is why she does this

When she does manage to sleep throughout a whole night, it’s ridiculously hard to get her out of bed until the early evening. She’ll cling to you and keep you in the bed with her until she’s ready to wake up and get ready for the day, so make sure you have a book or something nearby to keep yourself occupied

Marriage with her is a strange subject, considering she hardly ever speaks to anyone else aside from you (meaning she has no one but you to go to for advice on it). By the time she proposes with a ring she made using the metal from a few of her older tools, you’re already aware of what she has planned, but manage to pretend to be surprised anyway

She’s overwhelmed after you say yes, already worrying about how she’s going to make the wedding perfect, frantically asking you what you want to add to the ceremony and the decorations by the time you head back to the sanctuary

During the wedding, which is held in the Heavenly Toys lobby, her vows start off a little rocky, but just as quickly grow as meaningful as you’ve learned she can secretly be. She talks about how odd she found it that you trusted her so quickly at the beginning of the relationship, but adds that, after looking back on it, she’s grateful you did. She expresses how inspired you’ve made her over the years, and how you always help her work through any issue she has, never looking at her as a burden. She stresses the fact that she loves you more than anything or anyone else, and how she wants to always protect you and keep you happy.

After the wedding, she finally starts to let herself relax. She starts to open up more, and if you strike the right chord with her, she’ll start studying more humane ways to run her experiments

Ultimately, she starts off as a very paranoid partner, terrified you’re going to leave her or be mercilessly slaughtered out in the halls out of her reach. She keeps you close, essentially growing possessive over you within a short amount of time. However, after a while of gaining her trust and promising you’re there to stay, she’ll loosen up and provide more freedom. She wants to keep you safe, even if it means she comes across as selfish, but she knows you can hold your own in most situations, and she’ll learn to have more faith in you. After all, you’re now her wife. There’s nothing her wife can’t handle

Hi! I just wanted to say your stories are really cool and I enjoy reading them a lot!

That’s all have a good day!

Hi there, hun! I really appreciate you being here, and I'm very happy you enjoy my work! I hope you'll enjoy my future works as well. Thank you for your support!

I hope your day/night is great as well! 🩵