18+ Nsfw Mdni, Nsfw Visuals At The End

18+ nsfw mdni, nsfw visuals at the end

7:30pm - All training sessions for the day ended. Armin was so excited. He said patiently in your room, waiting for you. He was scheduled to be off duty tomorrow, and so were you out of pure coincidence. Armin could hardly contain himself. He looked forward to catch up with you, hear about your day and all about the week that had just passed, staying up late and sleeping in the next morning, holding you and enjoying your presence. He flipped back on your pillows and took a deep inhale in one of them. They smelled just like you.

9:30pm - The intrusive thoughts come out at night, when all is quiet and there's nothing else to do. Just by existing, you tamed the beats and hushed the voices that lived in Armin's head. He was starting to get sleepy, but his demons buzzed around in his mind like wasps to their nests. Training ended two hours ago, what could you possibly be doing for that long? Perhaps you had gotten sick and fainted somewhere no one could find you? What if you had gotten kidnapped? Did you get lost somehow?

10:30pm - Armin couldn't wait any longer. He just had a bad feeling in his gut. He sped walked to the training grounds, heart anxiously thumping in his chest. He finally found you. You weren't dead, thank goodness, but you weren't "training" at all.

You were goofing off with Jean, Sasha, and Connie. Your laugh filling the outside air with a sweet song. However, Armin clenched his fists at the sight he witnessed, peaking around the side of a building and staying in the shadows as to not be seen. Connie was running around with you riding on his back. The four of you were in stitches. Armin hadn't seen you laugh that hard in a long time. At least, not around him.

Your legs were wrapped around Connie's waist and arms holding onto his neck. He could guarantee that Connie could feel your breasts pressed against his back, and he could also guarantee that he probably liked it. You had never asked Armin to give you a ride on his back. Come to think of it, Armin wasn't completely sure if he could pick you up like that at all. He didn't have the upper body strength compared to Connie... or Jean... or Eren, while he's thinking about it.

Armin suddenly tasted blood, realizing he had bit the inside of his cheek a little too hard. His stomach also began to hurt, as well as his palm from his nails digging into his skin.

11:30pm - He stomped back to his own room. Angry was an understatement. Rage was more like it. Armin was sitting in your room on your bed waiting for you for hours but here you were, blowing him off to hitch rides from Connie? How could you do this to him? Had you forgotten that Armin was expecting you? Would you rather hang out with your friends than him? You saw them every day, but haven't spent time with Armin in a week. Quality time is one of his love languages. Was he not enough?

Armin was beside himself. Hot, furious tears ran down his face as he rocked back and forth on his mattress in a desperate attempt to sooth himself. He could hear your voice in his mind reminding him to breath, "in through your nose, out through your mouth. Inhale, exhale." But that wasn't working. He tucked is head in between his knees and counted backwards from one hundred. That also didn't help.

Armin was beside himself. Hot, furious tears ran down his face as he rocked back and forth on his mattress in a desperate attempt to sooth himself. He could hear your voice in his mind reminding him to breath, "in through your nose, out through your mouth. Inhale, exhale." But that wasn't working. He tucked is head in between his knees and counted backwards from one hundred. That also didn't help.

With one clean swipe, Armin cleared everything off his desk and sent it to the floor with a loud clatter. Books and papers flying across the room. He gave his desk chair a swift kick, crashing into the wall. His temper tantrum was also of no help. He had half a mind to throw his oil lamp out of the window, but that would cause a fire. Armin was livid, but not enough to commit arson.

He sat back on his bed, grabbing his pillow and scream-crying into the down feathers. What exactly did this mean? Did you not want to see Armin at all? Did you still love him?

12:30am - Though you were the reason Armin was in so much pain, he still needed you to sooth him. You were all he wanted, all he needed.

Armin slithered through the dark halls like a snake. He went back to your room, wondering if you had finally decided to go where you were supposed to be. He licked his lips and knocked on the door politely. Much to his relief, you answered on the other side with a "Yes?" Armin swung the door open, slipping through, and closing it quietly.

"There you are!" You smiled at him.

Genuine and warm, happy to see him. Your day clothes were laid out on the bed, you adjusted your night shirt on your shoulders. From the looks of it, you had just changed.

"I was wondering when you were going to show up. I didn't realize it was past midnight, I totally lost track of time." You rolled your eyes at yourself as you folded your clothes and put them in your wardrobe. Armin stood in the middle of the room, hands nervously rubbing together.

"I'm literally, so glad we have the day of tomorrow. We can actually spend some time together. What do you want to do? I was thinking we could- Oh, are you okay? What's wrong?" Your tone changed immediately upon noticing Armin in his current expression.

Armin had The Look. His eyes were red, plush lips turned into a deep frown, eyebrows scrunched together, and his nose pink. You knew he had been crying not too long ago.

"Yeah, I just..." Armin rubbed the back of his neck.

He had to think, and quick. What would you say if he mentioned what he saw, how he felt neglected and left out? Would you be upset over his spying? Guilt caused goosebumps to rise on his skin, feeling silly in the wake of his tantrum. You had already mentioned that you let time slip from you and that you were excited to be with him. He didn't want to make you feel bad, even though your lapse of proper time management and being close with another guy did make Armin upset.

"Lots of work stuff, you know? Paperwork... I'm not the greatest at math." Armin played it cool. You nodded in agreement, crossing the room to place a hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, I see. Don't let the numbers get to you. Math isn't real anyway." You lightly joked. You peppered kisses on Armin's cheek. This was just what he needed; your undivided attention. His negativity dissipated with each little smooch.

1:30am - Naturally you both stayed up talking. You were still wide awake, while Armin's eyes got heavier and heavier. Screaming, crying, throwing and kicking things took a lot of energy out of him. It was Armin's idea to give you a back massage. He needed to feel you under him, rub and squeeze all over you, silently reclaiming what is his. You laid on your stomach, while Armin straddled your backside.

Connie may have won the invisible fight, but he had definitely lost imaginary the war that only took place in Armin's head. At the end of the night, it was Armin who got to kiss you on the back of your neck, who got to caress your soft skin and tell you how pretty you are, who got to hear your angelic groans of relaxation under his firm grip. His fury had subsided long ago, but anxiety still lingered. His drowsiness amplified his anxiety to ninty-nine.

"Do you love me, baby?" Armin asked. You hummed.

"From this day, until my last day." You confirmed, head resting on your hands and eyes sewn shut. Armin kept working on your shoulders.

"No one else? Just me, right?" He quizzed.

"No one."

Armin paused. This was exactly what he wanted to hear, but it wasn't enough. From his outburst to your words of affirmation, he needed more. Blood drained from his head and down to his cock, growing harder at the thought of what he wanted to do; Reclaim you, remind you that Armin -- and only Armin -- can make you happy in ways no one else can. He wanted to rid anyone else touch that might be lingering on your skin, or in your mind.

Armin laid himself on top of you, putting all of his weight onto your back. He buried a hand in your hair and pulled. Hard.

"Promise?" He tested. Armin pulled your hair so your neck would crane backwards, exposing the pulse at your throat. You swallowed, a dark fuzz of arousal coating your vision.

"I promise." You agreed.

2:30am - You didn't really think twice about Armin's behavior. It was no secret to you that Armin dealt with his own insecurities. But, who doesn't? You weren't exempt either, and you were no stranger about requiring emotional reassurance. Not always, but sex was often an escape from the bitch of a reality you both lived. In your personal opinion, Armin fucked you the best when he was needy and had a bad day.

It was almost three in the morning, so out of a consideration of those sleeping in their rooms next door to yours, Armin clamped a hand over your mouth. You panted into his palm whilst he pounded himself into from behind, laying directly on top of you. You couldn't get away if you wanted to, which you didn't. Armin still kept a firm grip in your hair.

"You like the way my cock feels inside of you, love?" Armin huffed in your ear. You moaned quietly under his hand.

"I can't hear you." Armin hissed. He removed his hand.

"Yes, Armin, you feel so fucking good." You whimper. Armin hummed in return. You could feel the bass in his chest through your ribcage.

He cradled your jaw in his hand, forcing your neck to turn as much as it could to look make you look at him. Forehead to forehead. Armin was somewhat hidden behind his hair, but it was impossible to hide his giant blue eyes from looking directly into yours.

"You're still mine, aren't you?" Armin wanted to know. He was teasing, taunting, this much was clear. His hips didn't stutter or falter while he questioned you. Still, there was an underlying bitterness to his question that you picked up on. You were too fucked out to focus on a sentence other than agreeing with Armin.

"Yes, yes, all yours." You sputtered.

With no mercy, Armin sat up on his knees, dragging you up with him with one hand still stuffed in your hair. Armin pressed you up against him, rocking his hips and gripping on your chest. His lips gingerly sucked on your earlobe as he whispered,

"That's what I thought."

( for your viewing pleasure )

reblogs and feedback are appreciated!

taglist: @xttxck @snake-titan @fireandblood-xxii @pinkfluffybunnyy

“Gentlemen,” Mikey says.

His voice doesn’t rise above its regular volume but the single word is enough to quiet the room of executives settled around the conference table.

He's standing at one end, a hand in the pocket of his slacks, the other tapping a random rhythm into the mahogany surface of the table as he regards his...what did you say these men were to him?

They're your friends Mikey.

His friends. Right.

He eyes Ran Haitani who balances on the back legs of the chair he's sitting on precariously. His loafer-clad feet crossed at the ankles on the table. Next to him, his brother sighs deeply, his thumb and forefinger massaging circles into the bridge of his nose.

Opposite them, Kokonoi and Kakucho appear deceptively calm. Kokonoi is chewing diligently on a piece of gum. His attempt at quitting cigarettes. Kakucho has one arm slung along the back of Koko's chair, his legs spread as he slouches in his chair. His eyes are closed, his head tipped back against the headrest. If Mikey didn't know better he'd think Kakucho was recovering from a night out drinking.

Of course, the truth is much wilder than Kakucho spending a night on the town.

Takeomi is absent. Naturally. Sanzu is sprawled in his own chair at the other end of the table. His guns are on the table as he shines his katana.

Mikey considers everything he's been through with the men in this room.

If you can let me in, then you can let them in.

He shudders as your words wash through him. You're like his fucking conscience. It's simultaneously the most unnerving and wonderful experience he's ever had. A voice of reason that isn't being paid in his blood money. He glances at Kakucho again quickly.

If you think these men have stuck around because you're paying them then you're dumber than I thought, Mikey.

Sanzu gently places his katana on the table and shakes out the little cloth he was using to shine it. He gives Mikey his full attention. the action seems to stir the others who also turn to him. Kakucho lifts a single brow at him in question.

And the action sets of something akin to...gratitude in Mikey. It's a wildly unfamiliar sensation and he has to quell the urge to rub his chest.

They would die for you, Mikey.

Yes, they would. He catches a glimpse of a cut running along Rindou Haitani's chest as the man shifts in his chair. The skin is shiny and puckered from healing and a pang goes off in his chest that almost knocks him on his ass.

These men would die for him.

A sudden clarity comes over him and he has to blink several times to reorient himself. It feels almost like someone has ripped whatever ill-fitting glasses he was wearing before off and he can see clearly now. Jesus Christ, these men would die for him.

He sinks heavily into his own chair. The weight of his previous oversight anchors him to the cushion.

"I have news," he blurts.

The words suck the air out of the room. Silence ensues for a handful of seconds and then...

"Oh my God, you knocked her up!"

Rindou reaches Ran before Mikey can react to his exclaimed words and slaps his brother in the back of the head.

"I-" Mikey starts, blinking in confusion. What?

"Jesus Christ Ran, so what if he has?" Rindou interrupts, glaring at his brother.

"I di-" Mikey tries again, his brows furrowed.

"That actually...that makes sense," Kokonoi says slowly, nodding. "I saw her eat half a cake by herself the other night."

Kakcuho is gaping at Mikey. But there's a twinkle in his eye that makes Mikey nervous.

"Wait a min-"

"I thought you'd never notice," Sanzu laughs from the other end of the table and Mikey's skin chills.

What?

"What?" He zones out. Something in his voice must get the others attention because the room goes quiet.

"That's not...the news?" Ran squints at him, his chair making a thudding sound as he settles onto all four legs.

Mikey swallows around a ball of spit that seems to be stuck in the back of his throat. Pregnant.

No- she can't be- she- but- but the crying...and the sensitive breasts. the cravings.

"I was going to say I'm getting married," he says, hollowly.

"Oh shit," Sanzu breathes.

"Fuck, Mikey."

"I thought it was obvi-" Kokonoi shrugs.

"She agreed to marry you?" Ran interjects. "Without-" he pauses to glance around the room quickly and then lowers his voice as he finishes his question "-putting up a fight?"

That gets the rooms attention.

"What the fuck kinda question is that?" Kakucho frowns. "She's in love with him."

That seems to throw Ran for a loop. His eyes narrow on Mikey who's still stupified by the realization that he might become a father and husband in the same breath.

"Maybe there is hope for me," Ran says.

Sanzu snaps at him. "Are you implying Mikey doesn't deserve her?"

Ran splutters. "What? No- Why the fuck would I-"

"Just be quiet," Rindou sighs.

"You really think she's pregnant?" Mikey asks, interrupting their squabble.

"Yes," Koko nods.

"Absolutely,” Rindou agrees.

"Half a fucking cake Mikey...in a single sitting."

Mikey blanches. “She’s pregnant.”

Koko chuckles.

“She’s fucking pregnant,” he repeats. There’s a note of distress in his tone. “With a baby. A child!?”

Kakucho gives him a knowing look. “Congratulations, Manjiro.”

Sanzu, who has been uncharacteristically quiet stands. “This means she can’t say no to a protection detail anymore.”

Mikey’s brain stutters. Protection. Because shes pregnant with your child and about to become your wife. She’s singlehandedly the most important person to Bonten. And to him.

“Oh fuck.”

Rindou shakes his head. “We need to start personally vetting Bonten members now.”

“Why did it take a child and a marriage to convince you of that and not the two times we’ve been double crossed?” Kakucho questions.

“Do you want to deal with a Mikey whose wife and child are hurt or murdered?”

The room falls quiet as all eyes fall to Kokonoi. A heavy tension settles on Mikey’s shoulders. He’s having a child. Maybe. And getting married. Definitely.

And he runs one of the most dangerous organizations in the world. With over a hundred thousand employees worldwide. And stakes in every major and even some minor pies, in every industry.

He’s not sure of much except his own success and frankly, inhuman work ethic. But as the realization that his life is changing. Developing into something better, something more. He’s sure that if anything ever happens to you or his unborn child…he would unravel.

“Can we circle back to her wanting to marry him?” Ran asks, breaking the tension. “Without being coerced?”

summary: you’re generally a very confident woman. but sometimes your insecurities manage to slip through the cracks of your resolve. after dating for a while, eren sees you breakdown for the first time.

request: n/a

pairing: eren x reader

word count: 1.2k

warnings: cursing? body checking, insecurity.

notes: this is for all of my readers who are like me :) i’m confident in myself & love myself about 90% of the time. but that 10% is a right pain in my fucking ass lemme tell you. i see a lot of fics here where the reader either completely hates themselves, or totally loves themselves. where is the duality, a girl can do it all LOL. requests are open

eren is smart, there's no denying that. he worked his way through the gifted program all throughout school, graduated top ten of his high school class, and got accepted into multiple ivys across the country. while he might exell in an academic setting, his emotional intelligence is severely lacking.

because of this, you really can't blame him for the fact that he doesn't see through your facade. granted, it is a very very good one, crafted over the entire course of your life. one of the reasons he fell in love with you was because of your confidence. he was so used to girls diminishing their personality to be what they thought he wanted, instead of just being themselves.

you commanded attention in every room you entered, and had a way of speaking that captivated everybody who interacted with you. you were just so ... you. so perfectly you that he would have never been able to guess that deep down you were struggling.

you had invited him over to your place to get ready for a pool party mikasa, annie, and sasha were throwing at their house. "a way to end the summer with a bang" as sasha liked to say. you had dragged eren to the mall earlier that week to buy a new swimsuit for the occasion. you had loved it when you tried it on in the store, the way it fit your body and accentuated all of your curves. but as you stood at home in front of your mirror you had propped against one of the walls in your room you just felt...off.

the material that you had previously fawned over was now too tight and dug into your skin in a way that made it pudge out of the small top. the rolls on your back seemed to sag even more than they usually did. you hated the way the bottoms made your stomach look and after trying to situate the thin strings higher on your hips numerous times, you realized there was no way to make them look quite right. and god, did your stretch marks look more noticeable than they usually did on your ass and breasts?

you were supposed to be leaving the house in five minutes, and eren had been bouncing off the walls all day in excitement. you could usually ignore your feelings whenever this happened. just say "fuck it" and pretend you loved your body anyways. but today was not one of those days. all you wanted to do was tear the bikini off, crawl into bed and cry.

"yo baby, do you remember where I put that big ass water gun i bought the other day, it isn't in the bag and - damnnnnnn. hehehe jeans gonna be so jealous." eren cut himself short when he saw you in the swim suit he had bought you. he put his phone down before rushing over to you, his hands immediately finding your hips as his eyes raked over your body.

"not right now hun," you muttered, pushing your hands off of him. if he didn't notice anything was wrong at first, he sure as hell did now. he pouted a bit, but moved away from you all the same.

"do you know where the water gun is though?" he asked again as he began to look around your room.

"no eren i don't know where the fucking water gun is." you regretted snapping at him the moment he whipped around to face you.

"first, don't curse at me. second, what's wrong?" he moved in front of you, holding your biceps between his hands. you couldn't look at him. instead choosing to keep your eyes firmly on the floor as he messaged your arms. you didn't want to break whatever perfect image of yourself he had in his head of you. you wanted to desperately to be the hot and beautiful girlfriend that he thought you were but, fuck.

"aye, baby, talk to me. what's going on with you, huh?" you thanked god for this mans patience as you stood there in silence for minutes.

"can you at least look at me?" he asked, tapping the underside of your chin with his pointer finger. he frowned when you finally did. your big eyes filled with tears that had already begun to fall onto your face, your lip quivering as you tried to hold in your sobs.

"oh my sweet girl," he cooed, bringing you fully into his arms.

"do you think i'm pretty?" you asked between sniffles.

"do i think you're - of course i think your pretty baby. i think you're gorgeous. the most beautiful woman i've ever seen." he was so confused. of course you were pretty, hell you told yourself you were hot everyday in the mirror as you sat and did your makeup. it was like a mantra.

you stepped away from him then, your hands frantically moving up and down your body.

"do you see the way this shit looks on me. its tight in all the wrong places, i look like - i look like i'm like six months pregnant or something, you can literally see the fat that's pooling over -"

"oh my god y/n i'm gonna have to stop you right there. hey, calm down okay. just breathe, it's okay." he rushed to you again, taking your hands in his as he started to rub circles over your knuckles.

"i don't know what's going on, or why you're saying this bullshit but you are so gorgeous."

"but i don't feel like it." you rubbed the snot slowly dribbling out of your nose with your arm, too distressed to care about how gross it was.

"i know i might seem really confident all the time, but sometimes pretending to love myself isn't enough. sure i like myself, but i don't love myself. not the way you seem to love me." eren could practically hear his heart breaking as you spoke.

"well then if you can't listen to yourself, listen to me. you, y/n, are honestly and truly the most beautiful woman i have ever know. inside and out. everytime i see you it feels like the first time i met you. i will never get over seeing your body, ever. we can be old, and saggy and look like fucking raisins, and i will love your body just as much as i do now. you have no idea how perfect you are."

your tears had stopped now, only the occasional sniffle coming from your nose as you looked at him.

"you don't have to believe me right now but, you're perfect to me." not knowing how else to convery his feelings he bent down and kissed you. he kissed you so perfectly that you began to forget what you had gotten so worked up about in the first place.

you were beautiful. you were strong. you were perfect.

"we can stay if you don't feel like going anymore. we can pirate the new spider-man movie and -"

"eren. we're going." you said, stopping his adorable nervous ramble. planting another few quick kisses on his lips you took another quick look at yourself in the mirror.

"thank you." you said with a small smile. he couldn't help but bend down to kiss you one last time.

"i love you baby."

"i love you too."

"okay so the watergun?"

elle’s rambles: this might have been a clusterfuck but oh well . i hope y’all enjoyed. requests for eren are open!

Mikey's girl

Warning : minors DNI, 16+. Suggestive, heavy/strong language, blood, injury, Bonten being gossips but nothing more, kinda comical and funny !

Pairing : Bonten! Mikey x Female! Reader

Summary : what about meeting the Bonten ?

Since the day he met you, Mikey tried his best to keep you away from his gang life. Until that night...

Note : This is a short one shot, no one requested this, it's just a small thing I've been imagining before going to bed lol right after writing this I'll be back to your requests guys !

WORD COUNT : Around 6000

Running out of time.

Running out of thoughts.

Pedal to the floor, Sanzu pressed it until the dash indicated a number way out of speed limits.

A road, a race.

Not against a car, against time.

Against death.

And he didn't even knew where to go, which turn to take next, all he knew was that, damn, Ran is a motherfucker and Rindou an asshole, but Mikey would kill him if the elder died on his backseat.

-" Fuck, Mikey, we can't go to the hospital. "

That one, sitting right on the passenger seat had his fist against his mouth, biting hard on his fingers. Before he could even look at Sanzu or answer, Rindou's voice cut off from behind.

-" I don't fucking care about prison, you go to that shitty hospital. "

Dark irises peered through the car's central mirror, at Rindou's shape sitting on the backseat.His brother had his head his lap and his feet on Kakucho's.

The youngest Haitani sustained his boss' look, though trembling from inside, he kept a stoic face stained with his brother's blood, hands pressing Ran's thigh to slow down the bleeding.

If the road wasn't blurry from the speed Sanzu was hitting, if Ran Haitani was not bleeding to death on the backseat of his car, Mikey would have slashed Rindou's throat open for that order. Yet, Rindou was stained with his elder brother's blood, on the verge of losing him.

How couldn't he understand ? Especially him, who's brother have been stolen from him, who couldn't even get a look at his face one last time ? Through his hollow chest, there was still something beating, beating for him to do the right thing.

The right thing, the right one, the idea clicked in his head.

-" Take the right turn to Ebisu. Tsubaki's district. "

Bonten's second nodded, took the right turn just in time to head for Ebisu and was almost startled by Rindou's voice shouting from behind.

-" Mikey you fucking serious ? You... You know what ? Drop us. "

-" Rin' " Kakucho tried only to be cut off again by that one.

-" Just drop us at the hospital and you can go back to the headquarters. "

Pleading eye glance was dressed by an angry stare in Rindou's eyes, one that has been promptly ignored by Mikey who just started guiding Sanzu through the dimly lit streets.

Scoffing loudly, the Haitani brought his eyes to his brother's head on his lap, droopy eyes,shallow breathing, and a burning fever.

What the fuck is going on ? He wanted to scream.

-" I... I don't get it, you removed the bullet from his leg, why ain't he getting better ?"

Kakucho, receiving his question sighed loudly trying to calm his frantic heartbeats. Wiping the sweat off his forehead, along with the worry for his friend, he shrugged.

-" I don't know, maybe an artery has been touched ?"

-" And what the hell do we do-"

They were almost propelled forward by the power at which Sanzu had parked, immediately noticing that they were now in a residential area.

-" Wh-"

-" Stay here. I'll be back in a minute. "

Mikey left no room for argument, quickly getting out of the car and making his way to one of the houses, knocking at the door.

Be here, he prayed inside. Be here...

Multiple questions and death glares from Rindou toward the house after, the lights inside the house turned on.

2.am in the morning they knock at your door, every woman should have been afraid to even get up from bed.

But how to even be scared ?

There, all your dreams taking the shape of a man sharing your bed since weeks and weeks, standing in your front porch light.

The magnet to your smile, Sano Manjiro, he was a regular of your front door, the gift of the late night for you. So much, you hadn't even changed from your Pajama shorts and strapped top, nothing he hadn't seen anyway.

Only for a minute, the universe pretended it loved him. For a split second, there was just... Manjiro, and you. Because his heart had beaten like when he was a kid, a happy kid, seeing the smile you offered him with sleepy eyes.

What a shame if his old friends knew, after years of trying, the thing lifting him from the floor to be a weak small woman...

But your smile dropped as soon, remarking that he wasn't coming inside like he used to do, taking the hand you offered that it took him some time to get used to, but eventually started leaning in your touch.

-" A bitch, really ?" Rindou scoffed from the car, far from your eyes and ears. Indignation filled his blood but he was soon shushed by Sanzu and a frowning Kakucho.

-" She's not one of our girls" Sanzu explained, confused. " I don't know this place. "

They three watched their boss interacting with the young woman from afar, and stiffened when both of them started walking toward the car before Mikey opened the rear door from Rindou's side.

-" Here he is. " He showed you a rather tall man, head and feet resting on two frowning men legs. The street as well as the inside of the car were dimly lit, you could not see much more than blood flowing from the middle of his thigh, where his pants have been ripped. Mikey opened the door a little bit more when you crouched down next to the car, startled by the hand of the man gripping yours even before you could touch the injured man's face.

Guilt was a foreign principle for Rindou yet he could have sworn that was exactly what he had felt the minute the girl's doe eyes peered at him, maybe far, far from that sad reality where he was holding his brother's bleeding body, he would've took a minute to admire how beautiful she was...

Sensing his reluctance toward you, you pulled your hand away from him and peered at Mikey, standing next to you. You might have missed the dark glare he sent toward Rindou...

-" You told me he has fever, right ?"

He nodded, turning back to you. Frowning, you looked at the three men inside the car who already were eyeing you curiously.

-" Do you still have the bullet ?"

-" Are you fucking kidding me ?" The one with the purple mullet answered you, you pulled your head back surprised by the hostility in his tone. " Why in hell would we k-"

-" It's here " the one with the scarred face cut him off with a hurry, leaning toward the car's floor to reach for the bullet he threw there previously. He hadn't missed the step Mikey had took toward the car after hearing Rindou's answer, it was nor the time neither the place for fighting.

Taking the bullet from him, at first nothing seemed special about it. Yet you had your idea about the fever, and went to smell that one. Other than the smell of smoke and blood, and there was an after smell to it. One you used to smell at the hospital shifts...

The ball has been damaged, either from the impact or when removed from his body, but what had caught your attention was the dark, heavy paste adorning the crooked bullet, your head fell slightly backward in a curse.

-" Fuck... "

All of them frowned, but Mikey did because you rarely cursed, Rindou was faster to ask about what the fuck you mean. His words.

-" The bullets have been laced by curare. A deadly poison. "

His heart missed several beats, eyes going naturally back to his brother who already had passed out, his throat felt tight, and he couldn't even focus on your words when you stood up and mumbled to Mikey to get him inside your house.

Turning the living room lights on, Mikey moved your table out of the way while Rindou and Kakucho lifted Ran's body until your couch.

- " I'll be back in a minute" you whispered to Mikey before heading toward the bathroom, working at a hospital, your first aid kit was more like a whole surgery equipment.

All of their eyes watched you as you came back to the living room, hands full of medical equipment you put on the table before crouching down next to Ran who was lying on your couch, and there under the light they could finally take a better look at you.

And they were stunned...

Mainly because well, you looked like nothing of the usual girls they had at their clubs. Your face was empty of all make-up, your hair was loose falling around your face, but how attractive was that raw, natural sight...

Kakucho leaning with his elbows on the back of the couch, Rindou standing right next to him and Sanzu standing next to the armchair Mikey sat on, all of them eyes were on you.

And to say questions were eating their brain alive wouldn't be out of place. It was obvious with every rapid flutter of your lashes hitting those cheekbones, from your wide-eyed gaze, too pretty, too young, too pure for this, them, and him.

But you hands didn't shook, you didn't hesitated a second before wrapping the sterilized tourniquet around his leg, and to say the strength you put in that one woke Ran up screaming from pain... Well, you might be perfect for Mikey, they thought.

-" The hell-" Ran arched his back and breathed heavily, hand reaching his thigh to remove the pressure, as Rindou's hand pushed him flat on the couch, a soft one stopped him, he landed his eyes on you and-

It might have been the poison, the pain, but no one ever looked at him so... Truly.

-" I know it hurts, but you've been poisoned. I don't want the curare to reach your heart".

And just like that, a man surrendered. It all took a pretty shiny eye color, smooth hair surrounding feminine features, and a tiny voice coming from enticing lips to wreck his guards and make him drop his hand, make him take the pain.

Okay, you thought to yourself. This is do or die, the shallow breathing he had could be either because of the pain, or because the curare reached his lungs...

Was it too late or not, you were gonna give him the antidote.

-" Why'd you made this ?" The one with the mullet gestured toward the tourniquet, you went to answer but he cut you off again. " You better not make him lose a leg or whatever shit you've done it for, if he lost it-"

-" If he lost it what ?" Your voice rose up, dropping the syringe you previously had in hand to put both of your palms flat on the couch.

-" This, i'm only tryna repair your mistake. " You glared at him under everyone's surprised expressions. " Who do you think you are, removing the bullet as if you were doctor House ? That's the result of your recklessness, the poison spread faster and I'm trying here to limit it so you better shut up and not shout at me under my own roof".

Stunned, once again, no one found the words actually. It was obvious Rindou was upset, from how tight he was clenching his fists, however you managed to convince him to let you do your job.

As for Mikey, he simply could not take his eyes off of you.

You, his moonlight secret, the tide of his feelings, ones he thought he would never experience again. It all started with a smile, and before he could understand anything, a night a week, two nights a week, to an additional tooth brush in your bathroom, left t-shirts, and this house became a home.

Sure he knew you deserved way better, yet once you let the devil in your front porch come inside, again, and again, it felt right. He held you tight, and that was all that you seemed to need, his bruising hold, his cold hands and rough touches.

Took and kept him in your hands in order not to break him as if he was a promise, let the devil inside and kissed all of his demons.

You were all softness and delicacy, that was mainly why he has been surprised by the daggers your eyes threw at Rindou, and damn his heart missed some beats when you got all of his men tail between their legs with just a higher voice. That is when pride bloomed in his chest, seeing you head high in order not to drop the crown, his crown.

His queen.

It did not stopped him from glaring at Rindou however, while you were busy administering the treatment to his brother. Needless to say has it been another random girl of their clubs, he would not even care.

But you, the missing heart beat, the late night rendezvous, the tatoo-lingering kiss, he felt personally offended.

Thanks God, after minutes of giving him the treatment, the so-called Ran seemed more connected to reality. The tourniquet must have been done right before the poison could reach any higher parts and it was only his luck. And thank God, curare's antidote was a simple myasthenia's treatment, one you could easily have home, otherwise the ending would have been different.

They all watched you as you stitched him and him wincing from time to time, then the man with a scar along his face helped you throwing all the dirt.

Strange was it how you didn't even felt threatened. An angel standing in silk pajama lingerie, surrounded by demons who could not keep their eyes off of your bare legs under your camisole shorts, off of your breasts perking up under the silk strapped top.

Why would you be afraid ? Satan himself glared at his demons and soon their four pairs of eyes found the floor very much more interesting than his angel.

-" How ya feeling ?" Rindou asked his brother once you left to " make some coffee".

-" I'm good, thanks to her. You should... You kinda fucked up tho " he answered while eyeing his boss from the corner of his eye. Rindou who was leaning against the couch sighed, he knew he kind of loses it everytime Ran would be in the middle of it, and he regretted it now, really.

-" Yeah, your girl saved the day Mikey".

That was Sanzu trying to get crumbs of the truth and Kakucho elbowing him discreetly. Truth be said, he has been smelling the smoke and now he caught the fire. Usually he would be driving his boss home after missions, the late months were the exception since he preferred using his own bike, one that he didn't touched since years actually.

His usual spot at the VIP floor of the club where he would be silently mourning has been empty, and oh that was definitely not a white hair of his on his black turtleneck.

Mikey knew perfectly what Sanzu was doing and therefore just ignored his statement, would it confirm his thought ? That you were his girl? Let that sink in.

-" Here !" Your soft voice almost sang, bringing a busy tray with several coffee cups. You put that one on the table and quickly made your way back to the kitchen, fighting the smile on your face once Mikey's eyes got stuck on the plate of his favorite pastries you brought and put on the table. Needless to say he was the first one to reach them, your cooking never failed to impress him.

-" Thank you, for this and... " The man with a scar and heterochromatic eyes started, before Rindou grabbed a bowl of coffee and locked eyes with you.

-" And sorry for... You know. He's my brother and... "

-" I get it " you flashed a smile that had his heart sinking in his chest, impression or not the room warmed like water with it.

-" We own you one " That was Ran, lazily smiling with droopy eyes from the couch. He more than everyone in there was shamelessly eyeing you from head to toe, the fever he had experienced previously waking up his lower belly now that he could take a better look at you.

Their boss knew, and they all knew the unspoken forbidden words choking everyone of them at that moment ; what in the heaven, hell or earth had put such a blessing in Manjiro Sano's blood stained hands ?

-" And those ones are Mikey's favorites by the way " he precised toward the pastries.

You chuckled, and everyone, even the most heartless of them all felt it, the light seeping through all of their darkness.

-" I know, I always have some for him. "

Always, there was it, the fire Sanzu had spotted from miles. Rindou's weary expression turned into a whole surprised face, because damn, you were it. Perfect, either was it your face, your features, or just how every curve of you was a kiss for the eyes.

It was your beauty for Ran, the blooming young one, the forbidden thing for dirty men like them.

It was your devotion and honey-dripping self for Kakucho, how is it that their boss haven't drained you of all colors ?

It was your fierce for Sanzu, how you put Rindou back in his place just as if you were raised by Mikey himself.

And your wit for Rindou, useful hands, smartness, knew from A to Z how to deal with a poisoned bullet.

And they could go on for the night, why this house shouldn't be soiled by him, nor by them actually. The fact was, his hand reached for your waist and pulled you into his lap, and the smile you gave him could light up the whole town.

And there she was, his solace in the grip of his hands. He knew what they all thought and he thought it too.

Too good, too pretty, too much for him. One day, you would figure it out and leave him but, his heart beats were a countdown until you would realize it.

And you'd blew him away. He'd be blue.

Until then, he would take them soul crashing glances and enchanted kisses, see would the darkness swallow the light ? Or would the latter shine through?

-" Well... Think it's time for us to go " Kakucho cleared his throat and threw warning glances at his three co-workers. They were staring.

-" Oh, just leave him on the couch. It's better not to shake his leg for now " you warned Rindou who was about to help Ran to get up, the elder brother gulped down at the enticing thought of staying and they all looked at Mikey.

-" I'm gonna take a shower."

That was it, his answer. He would be staying, for sure he would never leave you alone with Ran. Well, he would have been staying anyway...

Sanzu's eyes widened slightly as he peered at his co-workers, Rindou had actually the same reaction, until Kakucho implicitly pushed all of them outside, waving good-bye at all of you and telling Ran to have some rest.

Back to the car, and Kakucho counted.

One, two, three...

-" The actual fuck ?"

The whole neighborhood must have been woken up by Sanzu's loudness at this rate, he turned to look at Rindou sitting on the passenger seat and Kakucho on the back.

-" The actual fuck is Mikey getting his kicks with the glamour-puss when we thought he was depressed as hell " Rindou replied, pulling his hair back still incredulous of what he just witnessed.

-" Could you drive us all home already ? " Kakucho rolled his eyes, earning curious glances from his friends.

-" Really? That's all you got to say ?"

-" Well..." He sighed and rubbed his eyelids. "She is obviously... something else, I'm happy for him though, man has been through hell. "

-" Something else ? " Rindou mimicked. " She's a damn dreamboat. "

-" And she's a nurse, maybe even a doctor. Like, she has degrees hanging on her wall-"

-" Fresh clean pussy " The youngest Haitani chuckled soon followed by Sanzu.

-" Think Mikey fucks her as hard as he kicks ?"

-" Let's watch how she walks tomorrow and we'll know ".

-" You two are the reason why we can't have a Bible " Kakucho winced in a disgusted face, soon enough they started the car and he knew he would not stop hearing about it...

•••

Washing the thoughts under the water, the devil would have traded his hell, to let the water purify his sins. Once in a lifetime, Satan had wished to repent, all to be worthy of that damn forbidden fruit. Once in a lifetime his chest wasn't empty, it was filled with concrete-like worries, not good enough, not good at all.

As always, too swallowed in his own darkness, Mikey didn't heard the bathroom's door opening nor the clothes hitting the floor, and almost got startled by the warm hands wrapping around him.

When you are young you know nothing, they say. But you knew. He was walking some of his darkest alleys again, so hard to follow him through.

But it was alright, you just held him and if you two stumbled in the dark, then you'd fall together.

No words were needed, you turned him around and all the unspoken were in your eyes. Fever dream kisses, light touches on his cheeks, whispered sweet nothings built a wall between him and his demons.

Your hands pushed harder on his shoulders, frowning he looked at you and you whispered a " Trust me". He trusted no one.

But...

He dropped on his knees for you.

You smiled at him and your fingertips started massaging his scalp, washing his hair for him. Mikey hummed in silence, and slowly, like a sleepy child his head fell between your breasts.

Even your heart beats hummed a sweet melody for him, steady and slow, like whispering no rush, I'm not going anywhere.

-" You're so pretty... " You whispered, and smiled when he just growled.

As if you don't like it, you thought and rolled your eyes. And he did like it indeed, but he would never admit, burying his head deeper against you.

How could, whatever God after years of cursed fate, gift him such a blessing ? His arms tightened around you in another bruising hold, but you didn't said anything. You just took all of him, and he wondered was there a part of him you didn't took ? Did you even left anything for him, once you'd be gone ?

-" You gotta close your eyes " you whispered grabbing the shampoo bottle, Mikey looked up toward you.

No, they would come back.

And you were there, raw for him, nothing in between your two naked bodies except the water washing the sins away. The only sight that would ever give him goosebumps, you just had to be there, and he was not empty anymore.

-" I... don't like darkness."

And you were the light. Why would he close his eyes ?

On his knees in front of you the king admitted defeat, undressing his fears, and you swore to be there whenever his crown would be too heavy to carry.

The love caressed his cheek softly, no need to run, in your arms his darkness was tamed.

You drew stars around his scars, and like a blood stain marked him forever. Holy was the vision of the devil getting his wings washed, did it really matter if the angel would be stained ?

This was Manjiro Sano trying. He would change the ending, Peter would not lose Wendy, the bridges would not burn down, and the sun would rise on a whole new day after the dark night.

'cause after the poison, the blood, there were only two bodies loving each other in the middle of the night. One single heart beat, one skin, where you ended ? Where he began ? Holding yourselves so tightly it was just too hard to tell.

And in the end of the day, it was all that mattered.

•••

-" Dude, I'm telling ya. She's his girlfriend, not a bitch " Rindou explained to Kokonoi, Takeomi and Mochi. The first sitting behind his desk, he was working until late night when they all came in talking non sense about their boss having an affair, Takeomi was about to leave as well as Mochi.

-" we're talking about Mikey... Like, Mikey, like... White hair, dark impulse, Dorayaki ?" Kokonoi inquired with a confused face, only for both Rindou and Sanzu to nod their heads.

-" I don't believe you. "

-" No one fucking talked to you " Haruchiyo snapped toward his brother who just ignored him.

-" Either you do or not, he's home with her now, and Ran is there too. " Rindou pointed only to be stopped by Mochi.

-" What the fuck is Ran doing ther- you know what ? I don't want to know these kind of details."

-" He's been injured, and she is a nurse-"

-" A doctor, I'm telling you " Sanzu popped a pill from his bottle with a suggestive look.

-" And she's fucking hot, like... Lava hot. "

-" Like « I'm on the cover of playboy magazine » Hot " Haruchiyo added, Kokonoi rolled his eyes again.

-" I honestly don't trust your taste in women."

-" Kakucho ?" Rindou asked for the latter's say in the matter. That one who just sat on the couch sighed, crossing his legs and looked at Kokonoi dead in the eyes.

-" She's fucking gorgeous. "

-" Aha !" That was Sanzu, obviously, who was told he was too loud from his brother and who answered him with a middle finger.

It was usually this way,Bonten, all blood and guns from the outside, gossip girls behind closed doors.

Takeomi was about to add that he trusted Kakucho's taste more than the two others when the sound of Rindou's phone echoed through the room.

-" It's a Video call from Ran " he frowned, some of them gathered around him as soon as he answered it, seeing his brother's face on the screen.

-" Yo ! Aren't ya supposed to be sleeping?"

But no sign if tiredness was perceived in his face, he strangely was more... Interested.

-" What the actual glamour-puss fuck ?" He asked, getting his face even closer from the screen earning a chuckle from Mochi and Sanzu.

-" That's exactly what I said !" His brother pointed with wide eyes, but Ran was not done yet...

-" Wait bro, that's... "

He stood silent for a minute, dropping the phone on the couch which made his brother and co-workers frown.

-" Hey, you there ?" Silence... " Ran ?!"

Suddenly, the screen showed his wide eyes and a smug grin again.

-" Damn you'll never believe me, but I'm hearing moans, fucking moans !" He whispered-yelled the last part, the reactions were either a scoff or wide eyes.

-" quit shitting and go to sleep alr-"

-" I swear to fucking God, Rin' you know my face when I'm lying. They're in the bathroom, and there's fucking moans !"

They watched the younger brother's eyes widening, yes he knew his face when he was lying, and it was not that one.

-" Oh fuck-"

-" How's it ?" Kokonoi inquired curiously, like all of them trying to hear anything.

-" Quite sexy actually, softest moans I've ever heard I think... "

-" Can you record ?" Sanzu asked before getting an incredulous look from Kakucho.

-" Ran go to fucking sleep-" that one was cut off by Rindou.

-" No, can you get up ? "

-" Steal panties !"

" Mikey's gonna bury you alive " Mochi warned him, the confusion previously in the room replaced by an incredible unusual light atmosphere. They were simply acting as children and they knew it, but it was all so new coming from their boss, the usual iceberg that no one could even help it.

Even Kakucho, the one calling them out for their behaviours found the thought of your moans... Interesting.

-" I'm not stealing the panties. " Ran rolled his eyes, and in front of his friend's silence, he added. " but I'm recording. "

-" You all are so twist-"

It hit, it sounded, and weighted like a ton falling on their shoulders. Upstairs, where both of you were minding your own business, a particular thrust from Mikey sent you to overdrive, had your eyes rolling in the back of your head and legs trembling, crying his name so loud they heard you from the other side of the line.

All were kind of stunned, the voice moaning being cotton-candy soft, well now it had nothing holy...

-" Damn..." Ran's eyes drifted toward th ceiling, gulping down.

Honestly, I don't know if I cringed so hard or if I laughed writing this, I'll just let you decide which one to pick but I couldn't just not write it, it has been haunting my brain for a whole night lol.

-" Keep.your.both.hands.on.the.phone. !"

PART TWO : SOON TO COME

SANZU'S GIRL : SOON TO COME

Network : @tokyo-ballroom @downtown-roponggi

chapter 1 ※ why won’t you love me?

playlist: spotify link

pairings: eren yeager x fem!reader, eren x mikasa

genre: angst, smut

word count: 3.1k

cw: marijuana use, eren and reader are complete assholes, infidelity, semi-public oral(f.receiving), unprotected sex, mentions of pregnancy, a lot of dialogue

a/n: hiiii! this is the first chapter of my eren series, the fic title and the chapters’ titles are all 5sos lyrics bc if you didn’t know, i have to include 5sos in everything <33 enjoy and let me know if you want to be added to the taglist for upcoming chapters <33

part two // back to masterlist

Your hand fell on the mattress, on top of Spiderman sheets that used to always make you chuckle. Now they just left a bittersweet memory of their owner. You thought you'd meet another open palm, but the weight on the right side of the bed shifted until it was off completely. Turning to face the wall, you shut your eyes and wrapped your arms around your naked torso.

The sound of footsteps on carpet, the flick of a lighter, a cloud of smoke. A pair of tattooed, rough arms around you.

"Don't fall asleep here."

You sighed and pushed the man off of you, rolling to the side of the bed to retrieve your tossed clothes. An index finger tapped your shoulder, making you flinch. You shrugged him off and got dressed quickly, despite your sore legs.

"Is she coming over?"

"What? Oh, huh- yeah."

"You should change your sheets then." He looked back at his bed, chuckling at a small pool of liquid that was slowly drying off. "Eren?" You called his name from the door of his bedroom.

"Yes, baby?" Your heart ached at the nickname he gave you as his piercing jade gaze fell on your face. Bottom lip trembling, eyes watering; just like everytime you left the apartment that you sneaked into through the emergency ladder.

"This was the last time."

"I know."

You both knew it wasn't the last time. Maybe Eren was more sure than you were, his slight grin giving him away, but after all, you always came back to him. Every time faster than the one before.

This time it was no less than five hours, no more than six. Connie and Sasha's party made it impossible for your paths not to cross; and it didn't really help either that you and Eren had been best friends since the moment you were born.

Eren, Armin, Mikasa and you. Always together, never apart for too long. From your parents teasing you and Eren that you'll marry, to forming a sibling bond in elementary, to finally realizing he's a boy in middle school. The only issue there was that Mikasa had realized that too. She beat you to confessing, on your high school graduation day, her and Eren made it official quickly; maybe too quick. Because what Mikasa didn't know -and Armin suspected- was that you and Eren had shared innocent kisses, one too many make-out sessions that ended with promises to be best friends forever.

Best friends became friends, then acquaintances, then friends again. Then, on New Years Eve, three years after Eren and Mikasa got together, Eren came knocking on your door, crying in your arms about her, about their relationship, his feelings. His feelings about you. And then you were kissing him. And the new year found you lain in bed together, a blanket covering your tangled bodies, along with a horrible, ugly and raw disgust. For yourself, and for him. How could you do this to your best friends, how could he do this to his girlfriend?

“You there?” Eren snapped his fingers in front of your face. Your eyes fixated on the bottom of your empty cup before it disappeared from your hold. “Want a refill?” The next thing he stole from you was the joint that was stuck between your lips, the clear lipgloss leaving a mark around the filter.

You tilted your head to the side to finally look at him for the first time since you left his apartment that morning. The first thing your eyes fell on was your old heart-shaped locket hanging from a gold chain around his neck. You wondered if Mikasa knew there was a picture of you and him inside. Looking up, you fought the urge to move a strand of hair behind his pierced ear. His jade eyes searched for yours, but they were locked on Mikasa’s red scrunchy that held his hair in a messy bun.

“Mikasa was looking for you.” You announced and, taking your red solo cup back got up from the couch, heading for the kitchen before Sasha stopped you.

“Some of us are gonna play seven minutes in heaven!” She said excitedly and dragged you with her.

“Oh, I was about to leave.”

“Nonsense! Tell her to stay, Mikasa!”

“Eren will take you home later, come sit!” Mikasa and Sasha took your hands and seated you on the floor, them on either side of you. You tried to ignore Eren’s stare and opted for watching Connie place an empty wine bottle in the middle of the circle instead.

“Okay, who’s starting?” Jean looked around and you noticed the hopeful look he gave Marco across from him, but Sasha was faster, like a lion ready to attack her prey.

“Me, me!” Sasha extended her hands and twisted the glass bottle. Everyone’s drunk gazes watched it turn and turn until the bottom stopped on you. You already knew who the top side of the bottle stopped on, and you turned to Mikasa with wide eyes.

“No fair, Yeager has a girlfriend already!”

“It’s just a game, right babe?” Eren made sure to lean over and peck his girlfriend’s red lips before getting up.

“Yeah. Of course, we won’t do anything, don’t worry.” You whispered to your friend before following Eren upstairs. You wished you hadn’t looked behind you at Mikasa, how she drew her bottom lip between her teeth like she always did when she was nervous.

You recognized the room you stepped in as Connie’s. Eren fell on the bed, a joint still attached to his lips, and his hands dragging you with him.

“Eren, stop it.” You whined, but not once did you try to wiggle your way out of his grip. Such a hypocrite, you thought.

“You look pretty tonight.” He smiled up at you before extending one of his hands to the ashtray on the nightstand to press the joint down on. His silver rings glistened in the moonlight coming from the window as he reached up to move a strand of your hair behind your ear.

“Stop.”

“Make me stop. We still have...six minutes and 12 seconds.”

“Eren, enough.”

“Baby, baby please. I want to make you feel as good as you look.” He flipped you around and pinned your hands on either side of your head before kissing you softly.

And you let him. Every time his lips fell on your skin, you convinced himself you’d stop him, but it was forgotten again once he flipped your skirt over and moved your panties to the side. And you let him use his fingers to make your breath hitch in your throat. You couldn’t do anything else but give yourself to Eren completely.

You wanted to think about the girl downstairs that thought of you and Eren as the best of friends, the girl you betrayed every single day for four months, ever since that New Year’s Eve you and Eren spent with each other.

“You’re so pretty. Your pussy is so pretty for me. My pussy.” He mumbled between soft kisses and licks on your clit. You arched your back off the bed, grinding on his face as the bed squeaked under you slightly. His teeth barely grazed your sweet spot to tease you before he started lapping at the juices that threatened to spill on the mattress and give your forbidden act away.

You promised yourself this was the last time as Eren moaned into your cunt desperately. His hands reached for yours on the sheets but they were preoccupied; Eren looked up with a cocky smile at the way you were shaking, only to see it was because you were sobbing into your palms.

“I’m so-”

“Don’t say anything, Eren, please.” You mumbled as he fixed your clothes. He kneeled on the floor next to your head and tried holding your hands, only to get pushed away.

“It hurts to see you cry, baby, I’m sorry. Baby,” Eren checked his phone. Exactly seven minutes, “baby it’s been seven minutes.”

“Tell them I was drunk and fell asleep.” you mumbled and turned your back to him, facing the wall instead. You felt a hand stroke your shoulder, a beam of light entered the room before it was gone as the door closed behind him.

It felt like years that you had been muffling your sobs in Connie's pillow when the door opened again.

"Hey, are you asleep?" You could recognize the sweet, melodic voice anywhere. It was Mikasa, and she was now sitting on the edge of the bed as you pretended to be dozing off. "You don't have to reply, I just want to say something." You wiped a stray tear and listened cautiously. Mikasa was slurring her words a bit, which for her meant she was more than drunk already.

"I think Eren is cheating on me."

"He wouldn't. Eren loves you more than anything." You smiled to the wall sadly, making shapes on the mattress with your index finger. Mikasa gasped; she wasn't expecting you to be awake, or reply.

"Do you think I'm making a mistake being with him still?"

Yes. Yes, a huge mistake. You should leave him, he's not worth your time, Mikasa. You deserve better, someone that will always treat you right.

"It's worth another try, don't you think?" You said instead, knowing it's what your friend needed to hear. As for Eren, he was standing by the closed door, listening closely to your conversation; how Mikasa chuckled, how your voice was shaky and uncontrolled. When it came to Mikasa's question, he found himself scared you would have had enough and finally admit to everything. A sense of relief washed over him, but why did he also feel almost...mad at you?

"Sorry for interrupting, I started the car."

"Oh, okay. __, are you coming? Eren can drop you off." Mikasa offered you a hand, but you got up after denying it.

"I'll leave with Armin." Mikasa nodded and left, Eren mumbling something about 'be right there'.

"I'll come by your place later." Eren wrapped his arms around your neck and kissed your forehead softly. Your hands met his torso and pushed him away, taking a step back.

"Please, Eren..."

"See you!" He waved and left quickly, before you could say anything, because Eren knew you would tell him to fuck off and stay with his girlfriend. But that was the last thing he wanted to do.

     Hours later, as the clock struck four in the morning, you heard the front door click open. You didn't have the strength to see him, touch him, hold him. All you wanted was for Eren to disappear from your life, for you to only know him as Mikasa's boyfriend.

"Baby, are you asleep?" You heard a whisper and a drawer open; he was putting on his pajamas. You shut your eyes and pretended he wasn't there, that it was a dream, a nightmare even.

"I missed you so much. So, so much. You were so pretty tonight, did I tell you?" He mumbled, leaving a trail of kisses from your neck down to your upper arm. You shifted on the mattress, pressing your face further against your pillow.

"I can't take it anymore, __. I want to be with you, to kiss you in front of our friends, to go on dates, make you my wife." A sob escaped his lips, and you thought he deserved to be so miserable. After all the pain he's put you and Mikasa in, he should spend the rest of his life crying. "Please talk to me, I know you're awake. I want to see your face. I love you, __.”

"Stop." You mumbled and covered your face with the blanket, wiping a new set of tears away. "Just stop! I can't stand you anymore!" Eren's arms wrapped tight around your waist, his breath hot on your neck; you had never felt so close to him, but you hated that it had to be that way. It was easier to ignore the pain when it was just sex. Sex that took the stress of the day away, that made you forget everything else. But now...what was this predicament you've fallen face first in?

"Mikasa was looking at engagement rings today, you know. And all I could think about was how they were going to look on your finger." He huffed and held your hand in his, caressing the empty space on your left ring finger.

"Why did it have to be you, Eren?"

You weren't expecting an answer. And Eren didn't give you one. His fingers fiddling with the material of your shirt, sneaking in to caress your stomach was enough.

"Do you want a family, __?"

"Maybe with the right person."

Did you mean him? Was that your way of asking him to leave her? Eren couldn't help but wonder, yet he was always one step behind; always wondering, never actually asking.

"What about you?"

"I do. I really do. I want a little girl that runs around the house and makes me play with her. She will have long, brown hair like me and it will flow behind her as she runs. And she has the prettiest eyes, your eyes, your smile. I hope when she laughs her nose shrinks up like yours does. God, that will be the prettiest girl in the world."

     You let him have his little fantasy as you sobbed into the pillow, you let him smile and chuckle into your hair as he thought of a happy family living in the countryside. And you let him because you knew it would only ever stay a fantasy.

     Shrugging his hand away, you rolled off the bed and sat on an armchair by the window. The street was so quiet, you swore your muffled sobs could be heard from the small opening of the window.

"We have to stop, Eren."

"No."

"This is the worst thing we could have ever done, it needs to be over."

"Is it so wrong to love each other?" He exclaimed, getting up and falling on his knees in front of you. You shook your head and looked away, tears making your sight blurry and shaky. You could feel his open palms over your own, his head on your chest to listen to your heartbeat.

"I don't love you." You admitted. But what a fat lie it was.

"Liar." He knew. Eren could see right through you and your white lies. He knew when you were faking a smile, when your head hurt, when your leg was sore, when you were happy or sad or angry. All he needed was to take one good look at you. And he knew everything.

"It's true."

"Look me in the eyes and say it. Say it! If you do, I'll go. I promise, I'll leave you alone, I'll go get the ring Mikasa wants, I'll make you her maid of honour."

     Jade eyes searching for yours. This time they finally met. A shaky breath left your lips, a sob escaped his.

"I don't love you." You spoke loud and clear. And he heard you. Oh, how beautiful your voice sounded even as the words you spoke were hurting him, very much so.

"You love me. More than anyone ever has. More than Mikasa ever will."

"That doesn't change anything, Eren."

"It changes everything!" He exclaimed, caressing your cheeks softly. "Don't you get it, __? I want to be with you for the rest of my life!"

"You need to break up with Mikasa. Tell her everything."

"I will. First thing tomorrow." He nodded and took your hands in his, bringing them to his wet cheeks. Trembling thumbs wiped tears off red cheeks before you fell on the floor, letting Eren engulf you in a hug. "Kiss me." He whispered and brought his lips against yours before you could refuse.

Next thing you knew, his arms were carrying you to the bed, caging you between them. He played with the hem of your shirt and you didn't have to wait any longer to know he wanted it off. So you obliged, like always. Anything Eren wanted, you gave to him. Such a selfless act, for such a selfish person.

     An hour later and you were still playing that game you knew by heart. You would give him everything he wanted, in return you got a crumble of love that should be given to Mikasa.

"I love you, I love you, my baby. My little baby, fuck-come for me please." Eren's hands intertwined with yours, pinning them over your head on the pillow and drilling into you fast. He was close too, he knew he was, but he wanted to cherish this moment. It felt like it would be the last one, it hurt like a breakup. And making love to the woman of your life shouldn't hurt. Tears threatened to escape his sapphire eyes as he leaned down to kiss you softly.

"Want to stay with you here forever. I want to make love to you everyday, baby please." He whimpered. You didn’t have the heart to reply to him, instead focusing on the euphoria you felt as he fucked you into the mattress.

“Eren, Eren!” You moaned his name, desperately holding onto the sound of it as you arched your back off the bed. You didn’t know when the next time you’ll be calling for him like that would be. And as you reached your orgasm, you hugged Eren and brought him down, not even a breath separating the two of you.

“You’re on birth control, right?” You nodded, and he gripped your jaw to kiss you again. With one last thrust, Eren painted your walls white with his cum, giving a few more slow rolls of his hips before pulling out.

And just like that, it felt like your life was over. You were drowning in a bottomless pit of sorrow, but Eren was still with you. He was in your bathroom, filling the tub with warm water. His clothes were on your floor, his spare ones in your drawer.

“I have to go home. Mikasa will come over for breakfast.” His apologetic eyes as he picked his clothes up made you scoff. You knew his promise of breaking up would end up untrue and Mikasa would be calling later to talk about how he surprised her with flowers and pancakes. And that she had no reason for worrying, because they were better than ever.

“Will you break up with her?” You called as he stood at the door.

“Soon.”

Yeah. Soon.

taglist: @chaotic-nick @arean @didiyogo @fuwushiguro

━━━ ❝where you belong…❞ [ I ] 18+

↳ ; ༄ eren j. x f!reader ━━━ mini series I. II. status — ongoing

synopsis ; when you catch eren cheating, he doesn’t chase after you. doesn’t try and find you. he simply lets you go because he knows that you’ll always come back to where you belong. back to him.

tw ; ༄ manipulation, gaslighting, infidelity, toxic relationship

w.c ; ༄ 12k

↳ note from syn ; ༄ it’s funny because i wasn’t actually going to post this in fear that it’s as bad as i think it is but tbh, comments are just opinions. words shouldn’t hold power over anyone and i worked hard on this so i said “fuck it” bc i (and everyone else) take time out to write what we write for FREE so it is what it is. also, this was supposed to be a oneshot but it’s getting a bit long so i’m splitting it up! this is a mini series which means there’s going to be a second part, which will be the final part to this; it’ll be out very, very soon so be on the lookout! ୧

↳ p.s. ; ༄ give a massive thank you to @arcanedevil for giving this a good look over (otherwise it’d be total crap ngl) heheh, luv you dearlyy — & as always, rbs/likes are very appreciated, tyy ᰔ

Eren Jaeger was the perfect boyfriend.

He worked for his father in preparation to take over his company someday soon, and stayed quite busy with that. Despite his minimal time towards everything else, he still managed to give you the right amount of time and attention that you needed from him as your boyfriend. 

Eren was sweet, thoughtful even. Call it cheesy but he liked bringing you flowers sometimes before coming home from work. Instead of you packing his lunch for the day, he was always the one that made sure you had something ready to go because he remembered you did errands all day for him and took care of the house so anything to help take the load off — he was on it. 

Was there laundry that needed to be done? Already gone through the washer and dryer, and even folded up neatly in the laundry room for you to put away. Dishes perhaps? Cleaned and put back in the cabinets. Eren believed in cleaning up as he went and he never slipped up on that. 

So not only did he take care of the house, but he also took care of you.

He didn’t have much time on his hands but he made sure there was just enough to spend with you when he wasn’t swamped at work. You didn’t understand his job thoroughly, but you knew how hard he worked and never slacked on contributing to the house and to the relationship. 

Eren was such a good man to you that both his and your parents have been nagging the two of you to just tie the knot already. You’d been dating for exactly three years, even progressing to live together now. Your parents were more demanding on the idea of getting married soon and giving them grandchildren because they still held onto the old stigma that once you’ve moved in with one another, marriage had to be next. 

You weren’t against marriage. No. It just wasn’t as important as they made it out to be. Your mom constantly told you, during your daily lunches with her, that your generation had a high divorce rate and you indulged her by saying that it was probably because young people tended to get married too quickly. You’d made a good point and she left the topic alone for a while. You knew it was going to come back up in a few weeks but whatever it took to get her to understand that neither you nor Eren were thinking about marriage right now.

At the start of your talking stage with him, it was hard to get a proper date out of him. On your third day of getting to know him, he wanted to come over your place to have sex. 

Third day. 

Naturally, you declined by saying that you barely knew the guy. He was persistent, that was for sure. Constantly texting, calling, stopping by your job at the time to buy his usual while lingering around, keeping you company, he’d say. Eren was like a fly you just couldn’t get rid of and eventually — he’d grown on you. You found out that you liked being chased and that he liked chasing after you and your precious time. When a month went by, you finally invited him over for dinner one night. 

Interestingly enough, he hadn’t pushed you for sex. With his foot finally in your door, he was sweet and only wanted to spend time with you. That was what nudged you to makeout with him on the couch after dinner and a long conversation. Before things could’ve gone any further, he pulled you back to ask if sex was what you wanted and if you were sure. It only made you even more sure that it was something you wanted and practically begged for it. He smiled because finally, he had you right where he wanted you. Carried you in his arms all the way to your bedroom and gently laid you down, spreading your legs and making you forget all about how long you made him wait for this. 

Soon after, many nights like that followed. 

You were beginning to get attached to him and wanted something exclusive, but that was the catch with him. He enjoyed being around you and having sex with you but when it came to tying him down with a label — it was harder than you thought it’d be. 

Eren wasn’t the sort of guy that slept with several girls a week. He was definitely not a socialite, and had a small circle of friends that he talked to on a day to day basis. He wasn’t a shy guy nor was he haunted by an ex. There was no specific reason as to why he was so against labeling what you two had and you began to feel that maybe it wasn’t all that important. As long as he wasn’t seeing anyone else like he was with you, did it really matter?

You started to feel like something was wrong with you. That, maybe, he just didn’t feel like you were good enough to be his official girlfriend so your attitude began to change, and he caught onto it pretty quickly. 

“What’s the matter? You're quieter than usual.”

“…s’nothing. How was it working with your dad today?”

“Uh…fine, but–”

“Want dessert? I’ll go get the pie I made. It’s really good. Be right back.”

“Okay…”

You cried in the kitchen holding the pie in your hands. Whether you’d gotten tears all in it or not, you weren’t sure but you couldn’t hold back your emotions anymore. Maybe you were being dramatic…or maybe that was you invalidating your feelings again. Either way, you felt shitty that you weren’t his girlfriend yet while you two had sex daily, and he practically lived at your place now. It made sense to at least be able to call him your boyfriend but what did you know? Before Eren, you’d only dated one other guy and he was okay. He just didn’t put in the effort and maybe that was why you were feeling so strongly about Eren. You knew that he was the one for you. You desperately wanted him to give you just a little bit more. Just enough to let you know that he felt the same way about you and wanted to make sure no one else came and took you away. As if that had a chance at happening but you wanted to at least know that he cared enough to make sure it didn’t.

So, you walked back out into the dining room and told him about how you felt. It was sickening for you to do because that meant exposing your desire for a label, something he didn’t care for, and was scared that was going to be his final straw. That he’d leave you sitting there at the table, losing him completely.

Instead, your fears were coddled and kissed away.

“Hold on, is that what this is about?” He asked, arms wrapped tightly around your waist with you sitting in his lap, sniffling. Even though you were crying, he couldn’t fight back a soft smile, looking at you. “Mmm, looks like it. I didn’t know calling you my girlfriend was all that important to you, baby. Of course we can be exclusive. I really don’t care for labels but…if it’s that important to you, then I’m okay with it.” You looked at him like you weren’t sure if he was telling the truth or only telling you what you wanted to hear. He pressed his lips against your forehead and sighed. “The thought of you going out and finding someone else to replace me makes me sick to my stomach. I’ll do anything to keep you to myself and if it’s being called your boyfriend, I’ll do it. It’s something I’ve been thinking a little about too but it’s scary because when I love someone…I love them. Hopefully you won’t ask for marriage anytime soon because this is already a lot for me.”

You giggled and pecked his lips, telling him that marriage was far from your mind and was simply happy with being his official girlfriend now.

After that, things were great. The slight tension was gone and Eren found that being your boyfriend wasn’t all that bad. Nothing changed, really, and he was grateful for that. 

But like many things, peace never seems to last very long.

Eren still spent most of his free time with you but something was off and you couldn’t figure out what it was. Maybe it was a gut feeling or your intuition pulling at you but Eren…was different now.

He came home later than usual and instead of telling you about his day or cuddling you until he fell asleep, he’d walk straight to the bathroom, shower and go right to bed. Not a kiss on your forehead or even asking what you made for dinner. That happened for five days of the week and on the weekends he was either with his friends or with you, but quiet. He was on his phone more, but at the same time — he wasn’t ignoring you. 

You’d talk about your day, the news, what was going on with your friends or even interests of your own. He’d hum, give small answers or even look at you as you chattered on and on. You weren’t a very talkative person to begin with so it wasn’t like you felt as if you were talking his head off day in and day out. It only seemed that way because he didn’t seem to talk to you like that anymore and it began to eat away at your self esteem. 

Was it something that you were doing? Or, better yet, what you weren’t doing?

You couldn’t figure it out but the best way to rectify any situation was to talk it out so you made plans to do that tonight, when he finally came home from work.

Like the past few weeks, he didn’t make lunch for you so you forgot to eat something and worked on a small dinner. You were much too anxious to make anything bigger than a small lasagna so you got to it. Your mind was reeling and spinning with thoughts that maybe he was just tired of you now. Bored with the same routine and didn’t know how to tell you that. If his silence was to save you from the hurt and reality of the situation then you were likely to explode from the unknowing of it all. You weren’t sure how you were going to take being told that your boyfriend was bored of the relationship because you were content. You didn’t find the days to be long nor the nights to be dreadful. You loved when he came back home to you, kissing you and telling you how much he missed you. You worked from home now so you didn’t get a lot of social interaction unless your friends came over or you got invited out to lunch with your mom or close friends. 

You saw Eren more than anyone and the thought of him not finding your presence to be enough anymore made you want to throw up. What could you do about that anyway? Break the relationship off and let him find someone that made him feel something again? Did you have the courage to be that selfless? Eren was such a catch. He was miserably attractive and the sex was beyond anything you’d ever experienced. He was kind, understanding, caring and loved you like you were the only woman in his entire world. He was the perfect boyfriend but now you were beginning to wonder if you were the perfect girlfriend for him or if someone else was just meant to take your place.

When the hand on the clock on the wall striked seven, you were scrambling to get the table set. Plates and utensils were laid out on the surface of the table with empty glasses next to them. Instead of pouring the usual, you whipped out a fine glass of wine from the wine fridge. Neither you nor him were drinkers but on certain occasions, like this one, did you feel it was necessary to bring one out. 

Needless to say — you were stressed.

Thirty minutes later, you heard the front door unlock. Then it closed and you heard keys hit the small table near the door along with shoes sliding across the hardwood like he was taking them off, and pushing them to the side. Heavy but slow footsteps thudded through the hallway until they came close to the dining room…then curved around the corner, heading down another hallway that sounded like the way to the bathroom. 

You released a sigh, closing your eyes with your hands together in your lap. It was so quiet, you were almost able to hear your own heartbeat. Nervous wasn’t the proper word. It was like you were having trouble breathing. Several long deep breaths just weren’t enough to regulate the lack of oxygen you were getting, and it was because you couldn’t stop thinking about how the conversation was going to go. You didn’t care about upsetting him because this was something that’s been eating at you for a while. Something you’ve been wanting to know. You just didn't want to lose him over something like this. 

So you told yourself to relax. That it was going to be fine.

At least, that was all you were able to tell yourself to try and help.

After his shower, you heard him pad into the bedroom across the hall from the bathroom. You couldn’t hear much else so it felt like you were waiting for an eternity until you heard a door close. Soon, he was walking out of the bedroom and coming down the hallway again. Your heart thumped dramatically against your chest as you stayed seated, fidgeting in place, trying to swallow the lump in your throat. This was Eren. He wasn’t an angry guy and always listened to you when there was an issue or something that needed to be talked about. He was mature and handled it all with care and understanding. He loved you. There was nothing you needed to be afraid of. This was going to go well. You were sure of it.

When his tall frame finally passed into the dining room, a smile crossed your face. How long has it been since he sat down for dinner now? You couldn’t remember but didn’t care as you quickly stood up from your seat, pulling out his chair. You watched with anxious eyes as he sat down with a nod towards you, clear bags underneath his eyes. Your heart twisted in your chest. Was the impending conversation even necessary? What if he told you that his lack of engagement with you now was just because of how hard work’s been lately? You were positive that you were going to only feel like shit if that was the case. While he worked his ass off getting ready to take over his father’s successful company at the young age of twenty four, you were at home, letting your overthinking undo all the good in your relationship. Sure, communication was key but it didn’t help things if you sat around worrying over something that probably wasn’t that serious to begin with. 

There you went. Invalidating your feelings again. When have your gut feelings ever been wrong? If something wasn’t right, then maybe there was a good reason for it. 

The only way you were going to be able to find out was through asking him about it first. 

When you sat down, he started cutting at a small piece of the lasagna to put onto his plate. His silence unnerved you but you held your ground, firm in your decision to talk with him about your worries.

“So…how was your day?” You asked.

Maybe the talk needed to happen after a normal conversation.

Eren’s eyes flickered to the bottle of wine before looking at you. 

“Fine, but what do you really want to talk about?” He countered back, finding the wine to be a clear indication that you were wanting to have a more serious conversation than the one you were so desperate to start with. 

You swallowed the saliva that kept collecting under your tongue, and released a sigh. 

“Perceptive as always,” you commented under your breath, looking down at your lap. It was now or never. “Things just haven’t felt the same lately and I’ve been wondering if…if you still feel the same way about me.”

When you looked up, he was staring at you. His expression was unreadable — go figure. Usually, you were able to tell what he was thinking but nowadays, you’ve not the slightest clue. 

Eren cleared his throat and looked down at his plate, forking a good chunk of the lasagna in his mouth. He stared at the wall across the room like he was in thought. 

A long, deep thought.

“Just been tired,” he said, “Work’s been stressful. Sorry, baby.”

He didn’t even look at you when he said it. That was why you were having a hard time believing him. His eyes always told you the truth and when he was being honest, he never shied away. He wasn’t very good at lying so you always could tell when he was. This time, it was like he was hiding something from you and you didn’t like it. You hated that feeling. That feeling of knowing something was wrong but being unable to tell what exactly it was. 

It also made you angry because it was obvious something was off. Whatever was going on with him, he was keeping it close to his chest and you couldn’t stand it. There shouldn’t be secrets in a relationship. If there was anything he felt he needed to tell you about, shouldn’t he do it? No matter how bad or hurtful it was, you could take it. He knew that and still decided to keep it from you.

You couldn’t let that slide. 

“Eren,” you said in a firm tone that made him look back at you, still unreadable. “Just tell me what it is. Something is off with you and it’s been bothering me. Aren’t you always talking about healthy communication and that? What’s made you think you have to keep anything from me? You say it’s work but I don’t believe that.”

He shrugged, “Then I don’t know what to tell you, sweetheart. It’s the truth. I’ve honestly just been really drained with work and my dad. None of it has been easy, you know.”

“Lies again,” you stood up causing your chair to scratch loudly across the hardwood floor, fists at your sides. “Are you fucking someone else?”

Eren frowned before smirking, “Am I what?”

“Are you fucking someone else, Eren?”

For a moment, he just stared at you like something you said was funny to him. Then he went back to eating which only pissed you off more.

“You are…aren’t you?”

Your voice was weak this time, afraid to even entertain the idea that he was giving time that was always reserved for you to someone that wasn’t you.

Out of everything else you worried about daily, cheating hadn’t crossed your mind even once. Eren just wasn’t the type and you’d believed it for so long. Not once did he make you feel like someone else had the ability to replace you. He made you feel as though you were the complete package. That it was you or nothing. 

Right now…he was making you feel the exact opposite and you’d never wanted to be more wrong in your life.

“Can we not do this right now?” He asked of you, taking a bite out of the cheesy bread you made to go with the lasagna. “Really don’t feel like arguing tonight, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t care,” you sharply responded, giving him a hard look, “We’re either going to get all of this out in the open now or I’m leaving. Tonight.”

Eren stopped eating at that, flickering his dark green eyes up at you from his seated position. “You gonna what?”

Your expression didn’t change one bit but that didn’t mean he wasn’t making you nervous. The fast beat of your pulse was proof enough. “You heard me. I’m going to end up sleeping at a friend’s place for the night if we don’t talk about this like two adults having an adult conversation.”

He sat there for a moment, quietly. Even when he reached for his glass and poured a bit of wine into it, he was silent. You stood next to him, tongue pressed at the roof of your mouth, hoping he’d finally tell you what he’s been hiding from you. There had to be something. You couldn’t be delusional enough to come up with something that was so clearly there. You had a reason to be accusatory when he wasn’t acting like himself. Especially when he spent most of his off days on his phone while being with you. Something was up. You knew it. 

“So you think I’m cheating huh…” You heard him mutter before he brought the glass to his lips, sipping softly. He didn’t stop until the glass was completely empty. Then, he poured himself another but this time there was a faint smile on his face. “The stories you can come up with are hilarious. Ever thought about becoming an actor?”

“They’re not stories if they’re true,” you said back and he huffed out a chuckle.

“And how did you come to this conclusion again? Hm?” With his newly filled glass, he stood up, almost pressed up against you. You took a step back but he caught you by the waist, and pulled you right back in front of him. “Are you sure you’ve been getting enough sleep? Or have you been getting too much sleep? Because right now, you aren’t really making all that much sense.”

“Eren,” you tried to pull his arm from around you with a frown on your face, “You are not going to stand here and gaslight me into thinking I’m crazy. A woman’s intuition is 9 times out 10 right so how about you do more listening than talking so you can understand why I think you’re cheating on me.”

“Gaslight…” He stared at you, eyes glossed over with amusement and a bit of…lust? “That’s new. Where did you learn that one? Would never gaslight you, baby. You just need rest is all. How about…” he leaned down and ghosted his lips against yours, brushing them gently with a lazy smirk on his face. “I fuck you nice and good so you can stop worrying about small things and focus on us, huh?”

Something definitely wasn’t right and maybe it was the exhaustion being egged on by the chase of alcohol he was shoving down his throat or maybe he really was hiding something from you. Thinking that sex was going to solve it all. He couldn’t have been more wrong. 

You leaned back from him and held eye contact, feeling your skin prickle with heat. “Eren. Let me go. We’re not doing anything until we talk this out. I’m serious.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he moved to your neck and gave it a long swipe with the pad of his warm tongue, “M’serious too.”

When he began to mouth at your skin, you gave him a hard shove and he thankfully caught his footing before he backed into the table behind him. He leaned against the table with a hand on its surface to keep up most of his weight as he looked at you, a smirk still present. 

“What the fuck is your problem, Eren?” You panted, trying to swallow the lump in your throat. “I’m trying to talk to you. We’re talking, aren’t we? It’s either a yes or a no. Simple as that.”

He watched you fix your shirt back to where it previously was and hadn’t even realized that he had tried to unbutton a few buttons of your shirt. Whoops. 

“You know, if I tell you…you’ll just wanna leave even more…”

Your heart almost stopped. Was your worst nightmare actually coming true? Was he admitting it?

Was Eren actually cheating on you?

No.

No, he wasn’t. 

He was right. Maybe it was all in your head. Yes. He was playing a joke on you right now because there was no way he was insinuating that he was fucking someone else other than you. That wasn’t him. That wasn’t the Eren that you’d grown to know and love. He loved you and only you. 

And you refused to believe otherwise. 

With shaky legs and a foggy confused mind, you walked back towards him and took his face in your hands. “It’s okay. I know you’d never cheat on me. It’s okay. I believe you.” 

When you threw your arms around his neck, he didn’t make a move to reciprocate. He stood there, letting you hug him. He didn’t even move when you pressed several kisses along his neck up to his face. He let you shower him in little kisses and whispers that you wouldn’t ever suspect him of doing something like that ever again. 

Even through your sudden display of affection towards him, there was still that gnawing feeling at the back of your mind that told you to stay on guard. That there were things you were still blind to. If anything, be more alert now because there was no doubt Eren was going to prey on your aloofness. Take advantage of the fact that you were too stupid and in love to question him further about his abnormal behavior around you.

You decided to take its advice and remain sharp no matter how much you were in love with him because that could end up being your fatal mistake.

— two weeks later…

It was around noon when you’d decided to pack a nice lunch for your boyfriend and sit with him for his break at the company. 

You were excited.

Since the talk with him in the dining room a few weeks ago, things had really taken a turn for the better in terms of your relationship. 

He was more attentive, wasn’t on his phone the entire time you talked and even watched several movies with you until you’d fall asleep in his arms. He came home earlier every night and even offered to make dinner sometimes. It was like he’d done a complete 180, and you found yourself beyond relieved to know that the love he’d shown you at the beginning of your relationship was still very much alive. Things felt just as they had back then, and you couldn’t have been happier.

In light of things and your positive attitude for the day, you chose to wear a frilly yellow sundress with white platform shoes to match. The jewelry was kept light as well as your makeup. Your hair was up and out of your face to combat the heat outside. As you grabbed your purse, keys and the beautifully wrapped lunch in the form of small containers that happened to also be yellow, you walked out of the door, locking it behind you. 

Upon leaving the apartment, your elderly neighbor complimented your outfit and it only added to your upbeat mood. She asked if you were seeing someone and when you said your boyfriend, she talked about young love and how she missed having someone like that. She wished you well and hobbled off into her apartment. 

With a smile, you walked to your car and set everything in the passenger seat. After buckling in, you were off to see your wonderful boyfriend at work for the first time in a long time. 

Typically, he didn’t allow you to come simply because his father was apprehensive about you showing up when he felt his son needed to focus the most. However, since it was during his lunch, Eren had told you that it was safe to come whenever during that time so you remembered the exact time, and prepared for it. 

The song that came on the radio next made your fingers dance along the steering wheel, bopping your head a bit to the beat. You turned it up and began singing the words, not caring about the odd looks you received when you had to stop at a red light. You were in such a great mood that no amount of negativity from strangers was going to ruin it. 

When you finally made it to the tall building, you let the valet take your car off somewhere and walked inside with a little pep in your step. 

Hopefully Eren was going to be just as happy to see you as you were for him. 

You were barely through the door when a tall woman with blond hair came up to you, lips spread out into a wide grin. Her dark red lipstick matching the red bodycon dress that she wore and the louboutin heels on her feet. 

“How may I help you today? Are you interested in speaking with one of our representatives about one of the many programs that we offer? Or are you here for the internship?” She eyed your attire in a very judgemental fashion, almost looking as if she was disapproving of your choice of dress. You were forced to remember that no one at the Jaeger Enterprises knew who you were yet. It made sense why she felt that you were either a future customer or on the road to becoming a part of the business.  

With that thought in mind, you had to take a deep breath and pull up a polite smile even when it was the last thing you wanted to do.

“No. I am Eren’s girlfriend, and I’m here to spend lunch with him. If you don’t mind.”

The woman’s face fell just a bit, but it was noticeable enough. She clutched her clipboard tighter against her chest and blinked. “Really? I…I don’t believe we’ve met before. Perhaps I should ring him so that he knows you’re coming up. Yes?”

Her behavior now was strange. She looked uncomfortable and even sounded a tad bit invasive. Like she didn’t believe you and wanted to see if it was true. It made a little sense. You couldn’t imagine what it must be like for a random woman to waltz in, claiming she was the CEO's son’s girlfriend. It sounded a little outlandish when you gave it more thought but you had nothing to hide. Unless Eren decided to play a joke on you and pretend he had no clue who you were — there was nothing to worry about. 

You followed the woman to the large desk just at the middle of the floor and watched her dial a few numbers with her perfectly manicured fingers, listening for the dial tone. When you really gave the women you were able to see a real look, they were all so beautiful. It made you feel a bit out of place. They looked polished and elegant. Looked like the money they brought home every month with a salary of thousands. It started to make you feel self conscious as you stood there, feeling your palms clam up from the nerves of knowing that you did not belong there. At all. 

What was it like with Eren seeing those women day in and day out? Did he also find them as attractive as you did? Was he ever enticed to speak to one in a not so work friendly way? 

Those thoughts threatened to eat away at the joyful mood you’d walked in with until the woman spoke up. 

“It seems today is just full of surprises,” She said, the smile on her face beyond unnatural; forced. What was it about? “Mr. Jaeger did not pick up, unfortunately. So,” She shrugged. “There isn’t much that I can do. Sorry.”

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “Sorry? I…I don’t understand. What do you mean he didn’t pick up? This is his lunch, right? Maybe I came at the wrong time…”

“It’s his lunch, yes, but he could be with a client.” The woman set her clipboard down and tucked a loose piece of hair behind her ear, “If you’re wanting to see him, you will have to arrange an appointment.”

“What?” You asked, mouth agape. “An appointment for what? I’m his girlfriend. I don’t need an appointment.”

“Ma’am,” She sighed as if she was used to coming in contact with women like you, daily. “Like I said, not much that I can do from here. For all I know, you could be lying like the rest. I can’t let you up until I can confirm who you are with Mr. Jaeger. Now,” she sat down at a computer behind the desk and started pecking away at the keyboard. “-if you would like to go ahead and schedule an appointment, I can do…” She stared at the screen for a few moments while you were still trying to process the fact that Eren hadn’t even picked up the phone. What was more confusing than that was how hard it was to even see him in the first place. Why did no one there know who you were? You were in a relationship with him. You weren’t some stranger off of the street. You two lived together for god’s sakes. What the hell was going on? “How does next Tuesday sound?” She looked up at you, disregarding the far away look in your eyes. “At 2pm?”

Blinking, you looked back and smiled. “No thanks. I don’t need an appointment to see my boyfriend. Now if you’ll excuse me.”

You clutched the lunch you’d prepared close to your side and briskly walked towards the elevators that were off to the side. The woman called for you but you didn’t stop. There was no way in hell you were going to be kept from seeing your boyfriend whenever you wanted to. As if the fact that no one knew you there was going to make a bit of difference. The only way you were going to prove to them that you were who you said you were was talking to Eren, face to face. With your stupidly forgotten phone at home, you couldn’t even attempt to call his cell to clear your name. This was the only way. 

“Ma’am! You can’t go up there without getting cleared through authorization first! Ma’am!”

Her voice fell on deaf ears as you reached the elevator and was about to tap the button when a strong hand gripped at your elbow, swiveling you around. You were about to protest when your eyes met a tall, burly man that looked to be part of the security detail. His face was emotionless but his body language said enough. It hadn’t even crossed your mind that there was security walking around to keep the peace within the building. It wasn’t like you had time to pay that much attention while realizing the lack of knowledge about your relationship with Eren with the corporate staff.

“Sorry, Ma’am,” The man apologized, not a shred of compassion in his expression or tone of voice. “No authorization, no access. Please vacate the premises or I’ll have to force you out.”

“I don’t need any authorization if you’d just listen to me! I really am his girlfriend!” You tried to reason with them as you were being tugged back to the front entrance. “Try calling him again! I’m not lying, assholes!”

Trying to remain respectful felt useless when you were being forced out of the very building your boyfriend worked at. His father owned the entire enterprise and yet, it was as if you didn’t even exist to anyone there. Of course they saw you as another poor girl trying to see Eren again after spending one night with him thinking there was more to it than what it was. To them, you were merely a one night stand looking to be more and it felt degrading almost. No matter what you tried telling them, it wasn’t going to reach them because you had no proof. 

As you were beginning to lose the strength to fight against being escorted out, you heard a familiar voice boom from behind you that made you quickly turn your head. 

“Dear daughter in law,” Grisha said with a warm smile, hands behind his back. “What a wonderful surprise to see you here.” 

“So sorry about all of that with the security and such,” Grisha said over his shoulder as he approached a different elevator that wasn’t even near the lobby. You figured it was a personal one that only him and important clients were allowed to take. “My son gets a lot of…unwanted visitors so we had to take better precautions because most of those women didn’t have very nice intentions.” He chuckled, letting you enter first before he walked in. “So that’s why that happened but of course, none of that was appropriate in the slightest so I apologize, again, on their behalf. I’ll make sure they formally give their own apologies before you leave.”

“Oh no, no. That won’t be necessary,” you were quick to wave your hands, completely against the idea of making yourself a bigger spectacle than you were already made out to be. “I accept all apologies. Please, it’s fine.”

Your sheepish grin didn’t seem to convince him, “Oh come now,” he tilted his head, smiling comfortingly at you. “Don’t be so shy. You’re my son’s girlfriend. Soon to be fiancé and wife someday, yes?”

How were you supposed to respond to that? The Jaeger family’s always been so kind to you, and your family. Lots of get-togethers and gift-giving around almost every single major holiday. They treated you like their daughter in law already and though it was a bit overwhelming, you never wanted to disrespect them in any sort of way so you went along with just about everything they planned and did. 

Grisha, above all, was the most accommodating. The family definitely seemed to hold high expectations for Eren but acted as if they held none for you. You weren’t blind. You knew what they thought whenever they saw you. When you were going to get married to their precious son. When you were going to give them grandchildren. When you were going to finally become a part of their family, forever. There were clearly still things that you and Eren had to figure out within your relationship. So, marriage was too ridiculous to even talk about right now. Let alone children. 

Moreover, there was just too much you needed to learn about him and vice versa. Marriage was a forever sort of thing to you, so you didn’t want to just jump into sharing a last name with him. You needed more time, and hoped that the Jaeger family could one day understand that.

“You can never know what the future holds,” you replied with a more convincing smile in hopes that it was going to shut the topic down. Knowing Grisha, it was only going to satiate his interest for now. It was bound to come back up later.

“Hm,” He focused his gaze back forward, adjusting his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. “Indeed.”

“Eren’s still on his lunch break, right?”

Grisha nodded, “Should be. Ah,” He glanced down at the lunch you delicately prepared and brought with you, “Having lunch together, I see?” You shyly looked down with a nod and his eyes softened. “Precious. I remember my wife doing the same for me many, many years ago. As a workaholic, I could never remember to eat when I was supposed to but that lovely woman always remembered and brought the most delicious foods a man could ever want to eat.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the way he was going down memory lane and momentarily forgot about all of the issues that you’d dealt with Eren. Maybe you two had a future like that. Where both of you worked out all of your differences and just fell into a routine of being around each other, living out your lives. 

You hated to fight, to argue. When things were good, they were so good. However, when they were bad…they were bad. 

Arguments with Eren were always one sided. Hellbent on not letting you win or even speak because nothing you said mattered more than the point he was trying to get across to you. He was right, you were wrong. It wasn’t healthy, of course it wasn’t healthy, but you loved him and he was working on that; for you.

There was a lot about Eren that even his family weren’t aware of. He had manipulative tendencies and never liked being told no. That was a part of him that you couldn’t help him fix after the argument a few weeks ago. He said he was still working on those things too but after a small argument that happened recently…you weren’t so sure.

Eren was the perfect boyfriend but he just had a few things he needed to work out. 

— flashback.

“What the fuck is this?”

12:01 in the morning. 

You were woken up by the bright light of your phone being shoved in your face, being asked the same question twice over as if you didn’t hear him the first time around.

Eren’s face was turned up into an ugly frown, hand clenched around your cell. It looked as if he was prepared to crush it into pieces so you finished rubbing the sleep out of your eyes and squinted through the light to see what he was so upset about.

A conversation with your best friend was up. 

Still trying to locate the problem, you read through what he scrolled over and felt your skin crawl.

— mina 

are you still meeting up with armin tomorrow? 

pls say no bc you know how eren’s gonna take it

i don’t mind when u vent to me but lately it’s just been about the little arguments you two get into and it hurts to hear about

i know it’s late but just text me back when you can 

like first thing ok?

love you

delivered, 12:00am

Mind blank, you sat up and stared at the phone, not knowing what to even say. If you tried to explain to him why you were meeting up with Armin, he wasn’t going to believe you. 

Armin was having problems in his relationship and asked if you were down to meet and just chat about it all. He also wanted to see you since it’s been a while. Completely platonic; as friends. Still, that obviously wasn’t going to matter to Eren. He didn’t like when you were around a guy alone. Without him there, it made him nervous and you were never really given a reason why but you had an idea or two. He was a jealous man. Naturally, it was easy to assume that you meeting with Armin unnerved him because he couldn’t stand you talking with another man that wasn’t him. 

It was also the reason why he preferred you working at home and not at a place where he’d have to worry about men talking to you daily. Even if it was just about work. 

Mina didn’t understand what you saw in Eren. She knew what he was like from what you’d told her in previous conversations, and couldn't stand him one bit. She called him a narcissist one time she ran into him and she tried to tell you that it looked as if he was going to hit her but played it off. You tried to be understanding but it just didn’t sound like something he would even think about doing. You knew Eren. That wasn’t him. 

However, the way he was looking at you right now with flared nostrils and usually bright green eyes now dark as the room itself, it scared you a little. You didn’t have anything to hide but to Eren, that wasn’t always the case. He seemed to fabricate a lot when it wasn’t there, and you’ve never been able to figure out how to combat that. It was his word over your own. What could you do?

“Are you gonna have me ask you again? Because I wouldn’t if I were you,” he said in a low tone, phone still up and shining at your profile. “Tell me why the fuck you’re planning on meeting with Armin today and failed to tell me?”

You released a sigh. It was so early. Why was he insisting on asking about it now? “You know Armin. He’s a good friend of ours–“

“Is that what I asked you?” Eren leaned towards you, eyes searching your face. You sat, rigid. “No. It’s not. Why are you meeting up with him? Alone, at that.”

You stared back at him, feeling agitated now. “He just wants to have coffee and talk. He’s been having a few problems with Lili, and just needs someone to talk to. Plus, I haven’t seen him in forever so sorry I wanna see my friend.”

You laid back down and pulled the blanket back over your head. Eren clicked the phone off and set it back on the side table near the bed. He rubbed his face and groaned. 

“Don’t do that.”

“…do what?” You grumbled from under the sheets.

He looked at you, a soft look on his face. “Get all mad at me. You know I don’t like it when you do that.”

You pulled the covers off of your face and glared at him, “Then stop getting mad at me. It works both ways, don’t you think?“

Eren bit into his lip before leaning down to lay his head on your stomach. He stared up at the ceiling, clearly in thought.

“Sorry.“

You pouted, “For?”

His pretty emerald eyes flickered over to you, lips tugging into a smile. “For getting mad at you. Happy?“

“No,” you fought back a smile of your own and let a hand grip onto a pillow to your right. “You’re not going to try and stop me from meeting with Armin today, right?”

Eren grew quiet and you saw how he chose to look away from you, not wanting to answer the question. Your brows creased. 

“Right?” You asked him again.

He rolled his eyes, still not looking at you.

“Yeah, I can’t really promise tha–Ow!”

You smacked him with the pillow you were holding onto and he laughed, covering his face just in case you decided to do another sneak attack.

“Say it or I’ll do worse.“

“…no.“

“Eren.”

He flinched when he felt you move under him but realized you weren’t planning on hitting him again. His head plopped onto the bed from your stomach and when he pulled his hands away, you were straddling him. His eyes widened in surprise. 

“What are you–“

“I’m going to torture you the best way I know how until you give me what I want,” your hands played with the edge of his sweatpants, teasingly tugging at them like you were going to pull them down.

Eren smirked, putting his hands behind his head. “This should be fun.”

You grinned, palming his growing erection. “Yeah, but not for you.”

Not even two minutes into sucking him off was he telling you that he was perfectly fine with you meeting up with Armin. You made him promise that twice until he was finally able to cum down your throat, panting with his eyes squeezed shut. He was always easy when he really wanted something from you.

“Too easy,” you breathed against his inner thighs causing them to tremble at the feeling of your warm breath. 

Eren looked down at you before he flipped your positions, pushing your legs against your chest. You giggled at him, feeling him anxiously tug at your pajama shorts. 

“Deserve a good spanking for that little comment, huh?”

You fake pouted, holding onto your knees to keep your legs against you, “I think so. Go easy will you?”

He smirked, “Yeah, not fuckin’ happening. When I’m through with you, Armin won’t even think about coming near you.“

You shivered, feeling his tongue at your clothed cunt. “And why’s that?”

“Mmm,” he mouthed at the backs of your thighs, smiling against your skin. “You’re going to have way too many marks to cover up. And I know how much you don’t like wasting your makeup on something as silly as lovebites, right?”

“Eren,” you whined, “Please…ah! Please don’t.”

He swatted your hands away from your knees and pushed your legs apart until he was face to face with what he was looking for.

His teeth shined against the peek of moonlight that peered into the room, “Does it look like you’re in any position to tell me what to do, baby?”

— present.

Needless to say, the argument was diffused but it shouldn’t have started up in the first place. After the meeting with Armin, Eren was all over you that night. Ripped your clothes off and fucked you from the shower to the bedroom. You told him that the meeting with Armin wasn’t much. Just a bit of talking until Lili called and he had to go help her at the flower shop she owned and worked at. Eren didn’t care for the little details. He just wanted to 're-mark his territory'. 

Armin called him on his lunch break that next day and told him that he couldn’t reach you so he wanted to relay a message. 

“Tell her the advice worked! Me and Lili are good again and we’ll be communicating better now because of it.”

“Mm, no problem. Must’ve been some good advice if you were trying to call and tell her that,” Eren responded, signing off his name on some paperwork in front of him. He was clearly trying to gauge for any sneaky intel on Armin’s true intentions with you. If he had any, that is. 

“Yep, it was! She said to just sit down and listen to each other when we talk and we actually got out a lot we’ve been holding in lately. I didn’t know Lili’s been thinking about having kids and was just worried I didn’t want any because of a comment I made with Connie over the phone a week ago. Crazy, right? So basically it was just a misunderstanding and we talked about the best time to have children which is now since we’re both pretty financially stable. You know I’ve always wanted my own children so I can’t wait to…”

Eren tuned the blond out to think a little. So Armin was just a friend to you. That was good. If there was more to it, he wouldn’t have thought twice about getting rid of him. Sounded a bit drastic but anything to eliminate any sort of competition. You were his, after all. Wasn’t he well within his rights to protect what belonged to him? 

“Hey, I’ll call you back later. Kinda busy with work at the moment,” Eren said, signing off on the last bit of work he had for the day.

“Ah, sorry! I forgot you’re at work right now. Yeah, yeah. Let’s talk later.”

“K, see ya.”

If he had to get rid of everyone, he wouldn’t think twice about it.

As complicated as Eren was, he was still your boyfriend and you weren’t willing to give up on him. He wasn’t a project that needed to be fixed nor was he a problem that you needed to solve. He just needed your unconditional love and a lot of patience. As long as you continued to give him those things, you figured there was nothing that could go wrong. After all, he was still relatively new to a relationship so you didn’t mind the time it was going to take to remove the walls he still had up. 

“Ah,” Grisha smiled at you, “This is my floor.” He stepped out of the elevator but had a hand on the doors so they didn’t close until he was finished, “Go up to the 10th floor and Eren’s office is the last door on the left. If you find yourself getting lost, as this is a pretty big building, don’t hesitate to call my cell.” He patted his suit jacket, indicating that he had his phone handy.

You smiled, a bit embarrassed. “I…I actually left mine at home. So, I can’t really call you.”

“That’s quite alright,” he chuckled, unconsciously easing your nerves. “Just have Eren’s secretary phone me then. That’s if she gives you trouble if you ask where his office is. All good?“

You nodded, earrings chiming together. “Yes, thank you sir.”

Grisha shook his head, “Please. Call me dad.” You bit into your lip as he walked away, waving a hand over his shoulder. “Won't be long now.”

No need to respond. It seemed that he was having a good day. No need to go and ruin it with the truth.

When the doors to the elevator closed shut, you hit the tenth floor button and felt the metal box move further up. It was quiet now and you were finally able to think about everything. 

You weren’t sure if Eren was going to give you much of his time since you figured he’d still do some work while eating. You smiled to yourself. He was like that. Always so hardworking. Since he started to come home early, you often found him lying in bed against the headboard on his phone. It didn’t make you suspicious like before since he was always open to you laying by his side, watching him go through emails and such. It was boring but it typically put you to sleep. Especially when he hummed while doing it. 

It didn’t feel or even seem like he was hiding anything from you so it wasn’t hard to trust him more. He kept his phone unlocked and out of curiosity, you went through his messages and found nothing. Next was his instagram direct messages and even snapchat. Nothing. Well, there was this questionable snap sent from Jean but nothing you couldn’t see him sending Eren out of the blue. All in all, the phone was clean and you never snooped since. Of course, that was done while Eren was sleeping one night but when you told him the next morning, he didn’t get upset. He simply kissed your forehead and asked if you found anything. 

You realized he was hinting towards the snap Jean sent since he also knew how random his friend could be. After laughing it off, there was nothing more to talk about in regards to you going through his phone.

So it was official. Eren loved you and only wanted to show you that you could trust him. 

That was good enough for you.

When the elevator dinged and the doors parted open, you walked out and was instantly met with the secretary’s desk.

Chestnut brown eyes lightly lined with black liner and a hint of mascara caught you as soon as you stepped out of the elevator. Her lipstick covered lips spread into a smile as she ditched the notebook that she was previously writing into. 

“Well, hi there!” Her silvery voice rang, manicured nails fiddling with the pen in her hands. “And you must be…?”

When you told her your name, her eyes lit up. 

“Ah! You must be Mr. Jaeger’s girlfriend, right?” Startled by her knowledge, you nodded and she giggled. “Don’t worry. I know it’s classified information but he talks about you quite a bit around here.”

You felt your ears burn. That was definitely something you were intending to bring up to him when you saw him.

“That…sounds like him. Um, it’s still his break so I was wanting to spend it with hi–“

“No need to explain!” She interjected, jumping up from her seat. That was when you noticed how red her hair was. How pretty. “You’re allowed to do whatever you want here. Do you know where his office is or should I take you?”

You nodded, “I was told by his dad where it’s at. Thank you though.”

“You’re very welcome! By the way,” she stuck her hand out for you to take, her pearly whites beaming under the lighting of the room. “Anna. Just in case we meet again.“

You smiled back warmly, curling your hand around hers. “It’s nice meeting you, Anna and I’m sure we will be.”

When you walked away, she was still staring after you, face just as bright as it was when you first walked in. She seemed friendly enough which made you less nervous to walk through the floor in search of your boyfriend. Your experience with walking through the lobby earlier wasn’t one you wanted to particularly remember as an overall experience of visiting the Jaeger Enterprises so that was nice.

The hall that you were walking directly down seemed oddly quiet but you played with the idea that maybe everyone else was on break too. You didn’t know how a business worked but maybe when Eren had his lunch, so did the employees. Or maybe you just thought too much into it. The workers were probably busy. Perhaps their little offices were even sound proof.

Or maybe the floor was normally this quiet. 

Finally, you came to the last door of the hallway which was indeed on the left like Grisha had said. 

With a breath and a smile, you turned the knob instead of knocking. To be fair, why knock when he knew that you were coming? Sure, you took a minute but he still had an entire hour left to his break so what did it matter? 

Anxiously, you pushed open the door and felt your blood immediately run cold at the sight before you. 

“Ah! Eren! Fuck, right there!”

“Since when did you get this fuckin’ tight, huh? Been letting someone else fuck you, I bet.”

“Yeah and he was ten times better than you.”

“…you’re gonna regret that.”

Eren had the woman laid across his desk, skirt long forgotten across the room. Her panties dangled around one of her ankles while the other one was perched against his shoulder. She had her arms loosely wrapped around his neck, his hands holding her waist as he fucked into her. The desk rocked underneath them, creating a constant thumping noise over and over again. It was a miracle someone hadn’t heard them before you walked in.

Guess the rooms were soundproof after all.

His hair was struggling to stay in the tie he still had, strands of it sticking to his forehead from the amount of sweat he was producing. 

Everything was hurting. You were in so much shock and pain that you couldn’t even move. 

Was this really happening? No matter how many times you tried blinking, the image was still the same.

How long?

How long had this been going on without you knowing?

Then again, you’d known all along didn’t you? 

Eren lied and your intuition had been right. 

He was cheating on you. 

He was fucking another woman that wasn’t you.

You felt like you were going to throw up. 

The second you’d shuffled back from the doorway, your heel had caught onto the sill of the door. Catching your footing by holding onto the wood of the doorway, Eren’s eyes were immediately on you.

Great.

“Shit,” he muttered.

The moment you saw him stumble off of the woman and get his pants back up, you were running back down the hallway, ignoring him calling your name. Your eyes were quick to fill up with angry tears, barely able to see where you were going. You ran into a few people that worked there but didn’t stay to answer any of their worrisome questions about what was going on or if you were okay.

You fled back to the elevator but couldn’t escape Anna.

“Hey, what’s the matter?” She asked in a hurry as she rounded her desk, trying to get to you.

You’d smashed the down button several times, trying to quiet your sobs but it was no use. You couldn’t pretend that you weren’t in shambles. Your makeup was ruined and you didn’t look nearly the same as when you came through last. Immediately, she knew something was wrong.

“Hey,” Anna touched your shoulder and it was hard for you not to break down then and there. “Do you wanna talk about it?” You didn’t answer her and she sighed, chewing on her bottom lip. “Hey you know what? I know a good ice cream place near here. Wanna get some with me? We can take it to go if you don’t want to sit inside. I just…”

You glanced at her and after some thinking, you agreed. None of your other friends were available right now since it was still early in the day. They were definitely at work. You didn’t want to bother them and Anna seemed like a nice person. Why not? Plus, anything to get away from Eren right now.

Anna smiled at your nod, “Great. Let me just go and get my purse–“

You grabbed her wrist, eyes wide as they darted towards the hall. You could hear rapid footsteps coming and knew that Eren was still hot on your trail. 

“I’ll pay. Please, can we just go?”

Right on time, the elevator dinged and opened.

Anna blinked and saw the frantic look on your face and nodded.

“Sure, yeah. Of course.”

You tugged her inside and hit the lobby button, watching the doors slowly close but not before you caught Eren’s face in the slit. He looked devastated but not more than you. He called for you once more until his voice was cut off by the seal. The elevator moved down until it hit the floor, and Anna led you out and into the lobby. 

The same woman from before at the front desk tried to inquire where Anna was going but the red headed woman waved her off telling her that she was going on her break. 

Thankfully, that was enough to kill her curiosity and you two finally walked out of the building. Immediately, you were able to breathe and wanted nothing more than to be as far away from the building as humanly possible. 

“It’s just this way,” Anna said, holding your hand and tugging you down the street. 

————

“So the rumors are true.”

You were seated across from her, a cup of strawberry ice cream in front of you that was barely touched. Anna chose chocolate, and was halfway done with hers. The shop itself wasn’t very busy, and you were glad. It wasn’t like you wanted to be surrounded by a bunch of people at the moment anyways. 

Anna had an uneasy look on her face that made you weary.

“Rumors?” You asked, forgetting about your ice cream altogether.

She sighed, looking down. “Yeah. I thought they were just rumors. That there was no way Mr. Jaeger was having sex with the other secretaries on our floor. I mean,” she grimaced, “He’s dating you. Why would he do that?”

You laughed dryly, “Guess we both want to know the same thing.”

This…changed things. You never thought you’d have to sit down and think about what the relationship was going to look like if Eren ever actually cheated on you but now… Now you have to. 

You couldn’t stay with him. Not after that. If he was able to cheat on you once then he was definitely capable and likely to do it again. The saying was overrated but it was true. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Especially if you let him get away with it by staying in the relationship. 

All you wanted to do was cry for an entire month or two. Just wallow in the pain and hurt until you became numb to it all. Never leave the apartment, forget to eat for a couple of days and stay in bed until you can't tell the time of day anymore. 

Another part of you wanted to confront him. Scream, cry, yell and hit him until you got tired enough to stop. You trusted him, and he lied to you. For how long, you wondered. How long was this going on without you knowing? How stupid you’d been. To think that things had gone back to the way they were — it was your fault for believing it. The signs were probably there, in your face, and you’d ignored every single one of them. Now you sat in an ice cream shop, heartbroken. 

You felt like you were going to be sick. 

“Hey,” Anna called for you in a soft tone, gaining your attention. “It’s going to be alright, you know? I’m not sure how long you two have been together but this? The pain? It never lasts for very long as long as you’re willing to work at it. Now you just have to figure out if you want to stay and work things out or move on.”

In a way, Anna was like an angel. Maybe your guardian angel, if you believed in that sort of thing. She’d quickly become your confidant. Someone you were able to rely on. She seemed trusting enough, and there weren’t alarm bells going off so you decided to take her advice. As for what you were going to do…that was tricky. You had time to think more about it. Right now, though, you just wanted to take time away from him. To do that, you needed to go back to the apartment and get most of your things. Definitely before he got off of work because there was no doubt he was in the process of taking his early leave for the day to catch you before you left. 

You did not want to see him. 

After spending a bit of time with Anna, she took you to the apartment and said that she was going to wait for you downstairs before taking you back to his job for your car. You were thankful because you didn't want to do any of this on your own but you also found it unnecessary to have her come up. Especially if you actually ran into Eren trying to pack things up. 

An argument she didn’t need to be in on, that was for sure.

As you shoved various things in two different duffel bags, you began to get lost in your thoughts. 

So lost that you hadn’t heard the door open and close.

Once both bags were full of stuff you’d need for about two weeks or more, you turned around to check for anything you might’ve missed or didn’t think of and saw Eren leaned up against the frame of the bedroom door, dark thick brows pressed downwards into a frown. Usually, he would’ve looked cute like that but right now, under the current circumstances, he looked…

“Eren.”

“Are you leaving?”

Startled by the obvious, you blinked. 

“I…yeah. I am.”

Then, his frown disappeared like it hadn’t been there in the first place. 

“Okay. For how long?“

Trying to distract yourself from how strange the conversation was beginning to get and the thick tension that hovered in the air, you slung both of the duffel bag straps over your shoulders. Afterwards, you released a sigh, looking at him.

“I don’t know, Eren, but I’ll let you know if and when I come back, k?”

His eyes narrowed slightly and quickly. Too fast for you to prove that it even happened. “If?”

“Yeah. If. Now if you’ll excuse me,” You started walking towards him, muscles tensing under your skin to prepare for him to stop you but as he stood there, arms still crossed, and let you squeeze by him, you were even more confused. But, you gave it little thought. It didn’t matter. None of it did. You just needed to get away. Put some space between you and him. Maybe the distance was going to do him some good. He needed to miss you or maybe figure out whether he wanted you or not. From today's events, you didn’t feel very wanted. So whatever happened, it was about you and how you felt in the end. Hopefully he was going to understand. Then again, if he didn’t…did it matter either way?

When you made it to the front door, you pulled it open and felt it shut close. You whipped around, Eren’s arm hovering at the side of your head, hand still plastered against the door. His expression was unreadable so you couldn’t figure out what was going through his head. 

“Did I tell you that I’m sorry? Because I am.”

Unnerved, you shoved his arm away, “I’m sorry but that means shit to me right now.”

The corner of his lips pulled downward, almost in a half pout, half frown. His green eyes were a little darker than they usually were but maybe it was the bad lighting.

“Hm. So you don’t care? That I’m sorry?”

Frowning now, and highly frustrated, you huffed, “I don’t. Not right now. I just need space, Eren. Spa-ce. Know what that means?” His eyebrows twitched. “Means, I need to get the hell away from you before I make a decision I’ll probably regret later on. Now move,” you turned around and opened the door again. When you scooted back, you bumped into his chest, intentionally using it as a way to tell him to move back. He did, and shoved his hands in the pockets of his work pants, staring at you with a look of boredom now. 

You walked back out into the cool late afternoon air, feeling able to breathe again. The apartment had felt so stifling. 

Eren stayed in the doorway and leaned his shoulder against the doorframe, eyes boring into the back of your head. When you turned and locked eyes with him, you caught a bit of amusement in them.

It chipped at your nerves for some reason. Like he was proud of what he did. When you’d caught him in the act, he looked heartbroken. The Eren that was looking at you now wasn’t the same person. Couldn’t be. This Eren looked like he’d executed his plan just as he wanted and the outcome was how he predicted it’d go. Like he wasn’t going to miss you while you were away. 

It pissed you off.

“What if I don’t come back?”

He shrugged. “You will.”

“You don’t know that.”

He smirked. “Mmm, but I do. Most of your stuff is still here, are they not?” His hypnotizing eyes flickered to one of the bags on your shoulder, “Couldn’t have possibly packed it all away in those bags of yours.”

Your nostrils flared. He was right but still. 

“Don’t call me. Don’t text me. Nothing. I don’t wanna hear from you. I don’t even want to see you until I’m good and ready. Got it?”

He didn’t respond. He just lifted a hand to his forehead and gave you a mocking salute, smirk still on his lips. 

It only upset you further so for the betterment of your sanity, you stomped down the hall, towards the stairs. The more distance you put between him and yourself, the better. 

Once you put your bags in the back seat of Anna’s car, you slipped into the passenger seat and closed the door, being mindful to not slam it even though you were definitely angry enough to do it.

You were silent as you clicked on your seatbelt, mentally punching Eren’s sickeningly pretty face in as she watched you. 

Anna blinked, looked out her window towards the entrance you walked out of, and winced. Yeah this was going to be a nasty breakup, she could feel it. Good thing she’d placed herself right in the middle of it all. 

Not like her job wasn’t hanging in the balance or anything, no.

Course not.

With a small sigh, she pressed the ‘push to start’ button and felt the car purr to life.

“Woe is me.”

↳ end note from syn ; ༄ if this seemed fast, ignore it bc the next chapter is going to be prepared better, i promise;( anyways, part two’s coming soon! tysm for reading! ୧

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