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I JUST FINISHED THE PJO FINALE EPISODE SIGHSSSS

literally like them episodes are short as hell too

how is it already the finale i swear the season just started huh

this was so good i’m peeling my skin off

𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒍; shauna shipman x fem!reader

Summary: in which y/n and shauna make a plan to make jackie and lottie jealous.

Warnings: modern!era, fluff, angst. all characters are 18.

Note: English is not my first language.

"So, you agree?" Y/N asked Shauna, a hint of hope in her tone.

Shauna moves nervously on her chair. She looks briefly to where Jackie is talking with Mari, wearing her usual kind smile. The brown eyed girl sighed, looking back at Y/N.

"If they don't like us? Then what?" Shauna whispered, fear approaching on her eyes.

Y/N put a hand on hers and brushed her thumb on her palm, reassuring her. "Then we need to move on." She said, trying to hide her own fear. "It's our last year here, Shau. We need to make a move."

"It is a big move." Shauna ironically whispered, gaining a protest from her friend. "Alright, I'm in. But how are we going to do it? We need a solid history, say the same dates, how it started..." The brunette shut up when Y/N shushed her gently.

"Don't worry about it. We can plan it this week and next one, we can officially be out." Y/N says convinced.

"Okay." Shauna agrees, not sure about it but decides to take the risk and stay with the doubt.

The next few days, Y/N and Shauna plan all in the library. Since Shauna is in the football team and Y/N does not, it makes it a little difficult because the brunette felt bad later to do it. She calls Y/N and tries to persuade her, in vain because her friend wanted to do it. After all, it is Shauna's fault for introducing Lottie at her. Since that happened, Y/N felt immediately attracted to the tall and charming brunette and if like destiny wanted to make it worse for her, they are in the same theatre club. Y/N knew Lottie was taking extracurricular activities for her notes to count.

Just like they agree, they put on the plan on Monday. Shauna and Y/N entered high school hand by hand, maybe it is not a big deal, friends do that after all. But there are times when you know it more than a friendship way. And it happens with Y/N and Shauna.

All eyes were on them to every step they got inside. Shauna bit her lower lip, nervous and avoiding their gazes, she focused her grip on her sweaty hand on Y/N's.

"What the fuck!?" A voice makes them stop on their tracks. Shauna swallowed, recognising who it is. The new couple turned to look at a shocked Jackie, her arms open and her eyes almost popping out from their orbits.

Shauna looks at Y/N, searching for some help. Y/N squeezes her hand and takes a breath, smiling kindly to the hazel eyed girl.

"Hi, Jackie! Why do you look so surprised?" Y/N asks casually, receiving a squeeze from Shauna in a signal for her to be careful with Jackie, she advised about not to fool with her.

Jackie opened her mouth and closed it a few times, her eyes narrowed. Her eyes fixed on their intertwined hands. A whistle breaks the moment, Nat and Van coming with teasing smirk plastered on their faces.

"I'm not gonna lie, I didn't see it coming." Van commented, approaching them throwing their arms around the couple.

Natalie looked carefully at her captain, holding a laugh. "You good?" Jackie blinked a few times and looked at her, changing her surprise expression for a mad one.

"Amazingly." She muttered, slapping with her shoulder on Nat's and going away from there. The dyed blonde snort, making a loud sarcastic comment.

"I think I miss something." Lottie murmured behind Natalie, just like Jackie her eyes fixed on their intertwined hands.

Before Y/N could say something, the bell indicates the start of the classes. Lottie excused herself and went to her first period. Natalie smirked at them and followed Lottie. Van kissed their cheeks and ran to their class.

"I think it went well." Y/N said.

Shauna looks at her with a raised eyebrow.

•••

The next few days, the tension was palpable. Y/N and Shauna were inseparable to accord with their plan. Jackie at first gave them a weird look and went away, then she proceeded to do snark comments at Shauna. However Lottie is affected by their relationship, she didn't show it. She even protects them from Jackie, who can't believe her for not supporting her.

A day after they finished the training, Taissa, Nat, Van and Shauna were the last ones in the changing room. The brunette was taking a short shower before she went to Y/N's house, Taissa was looking at her while she brushed her hair, a skeptical expression plastered on her face.

"Are you and her in a relationship?" Taissa question. Van came quickly scolding at their girlfriend. "C'mon Van, it's weird that they start dating. We would come see it, and Shauna giving Jackie's heart eyes didn't help. So...?" Taissa inquired, crossing her arms.

Shauna flinched, her cheeks turning red. Not for feeling ashamed or almost she will be caught. It's for Taissa questioning and making assumptions that she didn't need to remark.

"I'm sorry, Shauna. Don't pay attention to her." Van tried to apologise for Taissa. Shauna appreciates it, but she knows Taissa doesn't.

From a distance Natalie saw how Shauna is restraining from snap at their friend. The brunette isn't a conflicted person, but there are times where if the person she cares about is being targeted, Shauna will defend them to whoever tried to do it in her presence.

"The only thing I see is them together, all the time holding hands. They are doing great, but then...," Taissa explains, making her point. "They never kissed in front of us!"

Van spoke loudly to shut up her but it was late, Shauna let her brush down and directed towards the brown eyed girl. "Are you saying this stupid thing only because we didn't kiss in front of you?" She licked her lips, letting out a dry laugh. "Let me tell you that we didn't prove to you all anything. If I kiss my girlfriend in front of you or not it's about our concern, not you Taissa! So the next time you have a better explanation, don't talk to me." Shauna grabs her backpack and storms out from there.

Natalie and Van looked at Taissa, seeing immediately the regret painted on her features. "You deserve that." Nat muttered, grabbing her backpack and going out.

Taissa looks at Van. "Are you mad too?" She asks in a weak voice.

"I tried to stop you. Of course you didn't hear and then it blew on your face, like always." Van said disappointed, copying her friend's steps and going from there.

Taissa cursed, she needed to apologise with Shauna. With luck maybe this time Jackie isn't mad at her for damaging the dynamic team.

***

Shauna turned off the car, stepping out and closing the door with a loud slam. She walks fast towards the front door, knocking a few times. She hides her mood when Y/N's mom opens the door, a warm smile on her lips.

"Welcome back, Shauna! Y/N is upstairs." Shauna thanked her. She quit her shoes and went to the bedroom, opening it a little with force startling the person inside.

"What happened?" Y/N asks when saw Shauna, her pronouns frown delate her. Shauna went to her bed, laying down. The other was there doing her homework. "Shauna! Take it easy." She reprimands her gently.

"Taissa doesn't believe our relationship." The brunette lowly said, losing the expression Y/N made. "And I have a discussion with her." She sighed, turning aside and watching you.

"What did you say?" Y/N asked, scared.

"She accused us of not kissing in front of them. I just pointed out that we didn't need to do it for them to believe us." Y/N gives her a sweet smile, caressing her palm.

"For a moment I thought you would screw it up." Shauna rolled her eyes, Y/N giggling for her behaviour. "But you surprised me, Shauna Shipman."

"It's one of my many charms." Shauna teases her.

•••

When Jackie finds out about the fight, she controls her temper and in a kind voice makes Taissa to apologise with Shauna.

"Did she really do that?" Y/N asked astonish, used to Jackie's reaction with them.

Shauna nods, rolling her eyes in a knowing manner. "I know someone talked with her before. She was warned beforehand."

Y/N nods thinking about it. "Maybe. After all she is the captain of the team." She brings a hand to Shauna's shoulder, squeezing it affectionately. "Everything okay?"

The brown eyed girl looked around the pitch, and a sigh escaped from her lips. "Yes. I'm just tired." Shauna murmurs, hiding a yawn. She just finished the practice and is sitting on the bench with Y/N, telling her about what happened.

"We can go. You need to finish that project and I need to babysit my brother." Y/N said, standing up. A confused thought crossed her mind, making her turn to look at Shauna. "Wait, Jackie always went with you..."

"I think Lottie is taking my place now..." Shauna lowly said, standing up too and putting a hand on her jacket pocket.

Y/N hummed, seeing the tired expression on her face. "How lucky she is." Shauna rolled her eyes at the comment, but a small smile approached her mouth.

"Do you think that if I come with you, your parents would be mad at me?" Shauna shyly asked, looking at the path.

"I don't think so. Actually they love you. They think you are a very good influence." Y/N said, a hint of smugness in the last comment. Shauna looks at her with raised eyebrows. "It's true, Shipman. So if you want to come you are welcome." She said now with a sincere smile, approaching her car.

Shauna nods, biting her lower lip. "I follow you then." She said smiling. "Also you are cooking, right?"

Y/N rolled her eyes playful. "Yeah, wife." A tiny smile approached when Shauna beamed a little at her answer, something unusual on the reserved girl. When she stationed her car outside her house, she waited for Shauna, who looked a little distressed when she came out but understood it when saw her walking with her phone on her ear.

"Fine! I need to go," Shauna muttered, a thin line on her lips. "Yeah, I'm with her. It's my girlfriend if you don't remember. I know, but when you were with Jeff didn't matter, right? You know what? See you tomorrow." She hung up and let out a piss sound, cursing under her breath.

"Let's go inside." Y/N said, not asking who it was even if she has a vague idea. She misses when Shauna softens her gaze while a calm involves her senses, forgetting about the call.

The brunette follows her, going inside when Y/N puts aside to let her in. Shauna felt a little embarrassed and the feeling that she is trespassing their parents' truths. It dissipates a little when Hugh, Y/N's little brother runs towards her and not Y/N.

"Alright! I changed my mind, Shipman. Get out." She faked being offended by Hugh's preferences.

Shauna snort. "Hey, little man! I think I'm going to babysit you and your sister tonight." She played along, this time Y/N threw her a cushion making her let out a loud snort while she grabbed it easily with a hand. "You missed."

"Yeah, I will say the same thing when you are hungry." Y/N hummed back, walking to the kitchen to grab a water bottle. Shauna pouted, oblivious to it. She guides Hugh to where her sister went and grab the bottle she is tending at her, thanking. "Give me your backpack, it will let it in my room."

After their parents exclaimed happy greetings to Shauna, they went to enjoy their date night. Y/N keep an eye on Hugh while both girls do their respective projects. The brown eyed girl let her pen on top of the table and let out a satisfying sigh, she finishes it. Shauna stretches her arms out and looks at Hugh, who is entertained by an animated film. Then, her eyes wondered towards Y/N, on her concentrated face, and how she kept biting her bottom lip while writing. Shauna put aside her head, watching her carefully. She is sitting on the floor to let Y/N have the couch for herself while all her homework is scattered around.

Her dream state came to a stop when her belly made a loud sound, making her blush. "I'm guessing that is my cue to do the dinner." Y/N murmurs, chuckling lowly while letting her pencil and catch the embarrassment look Shauna is giving.

Shauna helped Y/N do the dinner, watching Hugh when the other is busy cooking or cutting a vegetable. After they finished, Shauna insisted on cleaning up the dirty dishes while Y/N took Hugh to the bathroom to brush his teeth and go to his bed. Then, when they did their job, they decided to put on a film while Y/N's parents came back, Shauna doesn't like the idea of letting them two alone, so she waited even if Y/N offered her to go.

At some point, Shauna felt her eyes were heavy and let her head fall on Y/N's shoulder. She wrapped more of the blanket they are using to her body. Y/N kept her laugh and watched Shauna silently, her eyes fully closed while her feet were on the table, soft snores were slipping from her mouth. Y/N grabs her phone and takes some photos of her, smiling to herself.

And when Y/N's parents came back, they glared at them sleeping on the couch with the TV off. The same thing Y/N did with Shauna, now her mother is taking a photo of them sleeping together, Y/N's head on top of Shauna.

•••

Today is the first match of October and the first one since Y/N and Shauna got in a 'relationship'. Shauna's eyes travelled unconsciously towards the bleachers where Y/N is sitting, showing support towards the team and especially at her. Her brown eyes softened when they met hers, she raised a hand briefly to her and kept warming up, a silly smile on her lips.

"Keep focused on the match, do you? We need you." Natalie said behind her in a teasing manner.

Shauna snorted. "Like always." She retorted, kicking the ball to the goalkeeper, winking at her blonde friend when she scored and jogged to the other side.

When she spots her next drill, Lottie is there. She saw how the tall brunette stole a few glances towards the bleachers and then smiled at Shauna. "Hey, I hope you are in the mood. Someone needs it." She greeted her softly.

Shauna chuckles quietly, it's been a whole month since they announced their relationship and where the ambiance in the changing room changes too. She knew that Lottie had feelings for Y/N, she said to her a lot of times, but Y/N didn't believe her. Then, her fake girlfriend said the same thing about Jackie, neither Shauna believed her, that's why they are using their brilliant plan.

"How is she?" Shauna questioned softly, looking where their captain is.

Lottie let out a sigh. "She is getting better. She needs time." The brunette murmured, squeezing her arm. Shauna nods. It's getting on her nerves that Jackie acted like she was the victim when Shauna or Y/N didn't do anything. But she is grateful that Lottie is helping her, when well, Jackie is one of the stubborn people she knows. A few minutes later they returned to the changing room to put on their kits, their coach gave them a motivational speech, his eyes longing in Shauna, Taissa and Jackie, passing the word to the captain.

Jackie cleared her throat and gathered them together. "I don't care if some of us don't stand the other, right now it will change. We need to be a team now, someone you know what to do without doubt if your teammate would fail at you," her eyes linger on Shauna, licking her lips. "we are going to destroy them and scale to the finals!" She put her hand in the centre, a firm look on her eyes. Jackie knew it wasn't the best words, but mentally she felt a little exhausted. Lottie swallowed and put hers on top of Jackie palm, soon the rest followed her.

Maybe the words Jackie's used on them are working or not, but they are playing very well compared with other previous matches. Taissa scored the first goal in the 10th minute, it brings a new aura between them. Also the cheers coming from the bleachers gave them hope. They have a lot of opportunities, the ball resisting goes into the goal.

In the 42nd minute, Natalie stole the ball quickly from the rival and raised her head to see what she could do. She passed the ball at Taissa and then sprinted up, Taissa feint to midfielder approaching her and passed the ball to Lottie. The tall brunette covers it and gives a quick pass to Jackie, who feint a defender and thinking faster she has two options: kick the ball and with luck it goes through the goalkeeper's fingers and scores or passes the ball to Shauna, who is alone and can score it cleanly.

Jackie lets her proud aside, and passes the ball at Shauna before the defenders detect her. The brown eyed girl replied immediately and kicked the ball, holding her breath until the ball went into the net. The people on the bleachers stood up, cheering. Shauna breathes again when someone from behind jumps on her back, she lets out a chuckle, muffled by her teammates. Jackie hugged briefly at her, turning on heels quickly and going to her position. Shauna's eyes let Jackie's figure and wonder towards the bleachers, spotting Y/N cheering loudly, clapping and a big grin on her face, a smile that matches the sun.

Shit, the only thing Shauna is thinking right now is go there and smash her lips on hers. Resigned from to can't go there, she gifted her with a smile.

•••

"You shined out there." Y/N giggled when Shauna walked towards her. She wraps her arms around her neck and kisses her cheek gently.

Shauna instinctively wraps her arms around her waist, both hands resting there. She felt how Y/N caressed her nape, it was an easy access since she has hair in a messy bun. "It's luck. We all played well." She murmurs, used to Y/N's affection.

Y/N separated a little to glare at her with a knowing look. "For one, you need to take the compliment."

"Lovebirds! This evening there is a party, I count with you two." Natalie came, not caring to overstep on their bubble and wrap both arms around them.

"I'm not sure, Nat. Maybe they want to celebrate it in an intimate way." Van smugly said behind them.

Shauna saw Y/N's flustered cheeks and how she hides her head on her neck, feeling the warmth from her cheek press there. "Shut up! We are going there, after all I give us the win." Even if she is blushing too, her comment made Nat and Van whistle.

"That's my girl!" The blonde complimented her and squeezed her shoulder, doing the same with Y/N and marched away with Van.

"I guess I have plans now..." Y/N hummed, coming out from her hiding place.

Shauna grabs her hand and walks towards her car. "I follow your advice, I hope you notice it." She loves the sound escaping from Y/N's mouth and how her eyes are half closed for it.

Y/N stayed in her house to prepare herself while she went to her house with the promise to go for her to go together to the party. Shauna opted to put on a dress, even if she wanted to go with jeans, but she wanted to impress you and don't know why. She let her hair down, applied light make up and grabbed her denim jacket. She texted her to let know she is on her way.

When Shauna parked outside she stayed in her car, waiting for Y/N. Meantime she scrolled for Instagram, she used not to use it, but sometimes she entered the app. The first photo approaching was one from Jackie. They all gathered celebrating after they won the match that afternoon, she swapped and the second photo was only her, a mirror photo. Typically of her. She presses the heart and moves her thumb up, a silly smile when saw Y/N's post. It's a photo from last year, Shauna let her team jacket at her, an arm around her waist while Y/N had theirs wrapped on her neck, her cheek press on hers and a big grin on her face while Shauna has a lipped smile on.

When she liked the post, she pressed the people who liked it. She isn't surprised when saw Lottie's name or the rest of her friends, however she is surprised when saw jackietayloryj approaches from the users.

"Sorry! I was reassuring my dad that I will come to the accord hour." Y/N interrupted her stupor. She got into the passenger seat and put on the seatbelt.

Shauna blocked her phone and gazed at her. She felt how dry her mouth felt, her eyes scanning the outfit she is wearing. "You look beautiful." She whispers, red creeping on both cheeks.

Y/N turned to look at her and saw how Shauna was gazing at her, her mouth lightly open. She let out a soft chuckle. "Thank you very much, Shauna. You look beautiful too, that dress favours your eyes." This comment, the yellowjackets' player blush more, advertising her eyes from her and thanking Y/N, she started the engine and put direction to the woods, an old tradition where the parties celebrate.

There were a lot of people when Shauna parked the car. Loud music is heard, people chatting animatedly and when Shauna walks near them, they start to chant her name, making her feel a little uncomfortable but nodding with her head for their support. Y/N giggles by her side, holding her arm.

"I'm going for a beer, you want water, right?" Y/N asked, letting out her hand from Shauna's arm and when she nodded, the girl went to the barrel.

"How are you feeling about being a total winner today?" Van walked behind her, throwing an arm around her shoulder. Shauna rolled her eyes when saw a smirk playing on her lips. "By the way, Y/N looks beautiful." She said mindlessly, but when saw how Shauna raised an eyebrow, the redhead cleared her throat and rectified. "I mean, she always looks beautiful. But I don't know, today she is extra beautiful and sexy." She blushes, her freckles stand up from her red cheeks.

"You are worsening it." Shauna smugly said, for once glad to see Van like this.

They walk where Taissa and Mari are, after what happened with her and the Turner girl, Shauna was a little resentful for it, but Y/N convinced her to forgive Taissa.

"Hey." Tai greets her with a relaxed smile. Van wraps around her hip and pecks her cheek.

Shauna nodded with a smile too. She engaged in a conversation with the three until her eyes spotted Y/N and Lottie talking. She frowned, the hands turning into fists on her pockets and tightening. She felt the necessity to go there and kiss Y/N until they couldn't breathe. The kind smile directed towards Lottie was making her pissed, it didn't help that the brunette copied her and put a hand on Y/N's forearm.

Mari apologised and went with Akilah, the silence made Taissa see what Shauna was so interested in. She holds a snort, instead she nudges Van gently, pointing with her head in the direction when the redhead looks at her questioning. Her blue eyes rolled and gave Taissa a warning look, for her luck Y/N started to walk towards them, leaving the Matthews girl talking with a random guy behind, but Van could see how Lottie followed Y/N's path.

"Hey, guys! Sorry it took me so long. I was chatting with Lot." Y/N said with an innocent smile, tending the water cup to Shauna, who grabbed it with a thin line on her lips and quietly thanked her, sipping from the red cup. "That first goal was amazing!" She said at Taissa.

Taissa's eyes lit up and thanked her, a soft shadow of pink on her cheeks. Van smirked when she noticed it, but remained quiet. For sure later she could tease her girlfriend. Meanwhile Taissa mentally scolded herself for doubting their relationship, even if she still believes it's fake she has no right to criticise it.

When Van and Taissa started their usual bickering, Y/N turned to Shauna who stayed quiet the whole time, a hand in her denim jacket and the other holding her red cup, her eyes travelling for the place.

She wraps both arms around her neck, holding now her beer with her two hands from behind Shauna's head and carefully tries not to hit her with it. "Something happened?" She questioned her in ear.

Shauna bit her lip and shook her head, noticing how her breath hit her cheek, how her deep perfumes' smell hit her nostrils, how the few freckles showed on her uncovered shoulder. And how her lips caressed said cheek to affectionately deposit a kiss.

Unwrapping her arms from her neck, Y/N grabs the hand she saved in her pocket and kindly guides her to a clear where there are no people. Then, taking a sip from her beer her back leaned on a tree, scanning Shauna's face. Her brain stopped the moment a soft breeze moves in slow motion her hair, her red lipstick on her plum lips illuminating from an angle emphasising the colour, just like her eyes.

Before Y/N could question her again, Shauna threw her empty cup to the ground and smashed her mouth on hers, her right hand finding a place on her hip while her left on her cheek. It's a little messy and brief, panic raising in Shauna inside when she realised what she did and the stunned face of Y/N saying it all.

"Shit! I'm sorry, Y/N... I-I just don't know w-why I did it..." Shauna stammered, covering her mouth with her hands. She turned to go and ran away to hide from this moment. But a hold on her wrist made her plans change.

Slowly Y/N turned Shauna to face her again, the hold on her hand loosening and before the brown eyed could say anything, she grabs the collars of the jacket and presses her lips on hers, closing her eyes. Shauna's reaction came late, however her hands found a firm grip on her waist.

They separated for air, the deep gaze Shauna gave Y/N, admiring her features was enough for her to lean again and kiss her back. She softly pushed her back to the tree, her tongue sneaking in easily since Y/N had her mouth half open from before. It is deeper, desperate and longing, for Shauna it was a dream come true, she craved for it for a few weeks. Before they separated again for the same reason, Shauna bit her bottom lip, bringing it with herself.

"I guess you just keep winning, Shipman." Y/N said in a low voice, giggling.

Shauna laughs quietly too, pecking her lips a few times. "It's definitely my lucky day."

•••

After what happened that night, Shauna and Y/N couldn't stop kissing. They took every opportunity now to suck their faces, in public or not. At first it was shocking for their friends, not used to it even the involved ones were shocked too. And it did not help when Jackie spotted them kissing before Shauna's practice. The captain was giving them a hard time, mainly Lottie, who with a tired smile apologizes in Jackie's name.

They don't talk about what they are now, just enjoying this new and exciting experience.

Shauna separated from Y/N a little and opened her eyes, seeing how the girl chased her, she couldn't hold a chuckle. "Shauna!" Y/N whined softly.

"Sorry... You look adorable." Shauna murmurs, pecking her nose and positioning herself to a side on her bed, moving her own hair from her eyes.

Y/N rolls her eyes and copies her, helping to remove her hair out and later caressing her cheek while biting a smile. "I would probably look more adorable if I wore your flannel shirt." She teases her a little, moving her hand from her cheek to her collar, playing with it.

A new image about it entered Shauna's head, and she couldn't complain about it. Her hand flies to her waist and with her thumb caressed the exposed skin. She leaned again to capture her lips with hers, tasting her mouth for fifteenth time that day.

"You know," Y/N started to say when they broke the kiss, the brunette trailing kisses for her jawline, her fingers tangled on her hair. "You can stay here tonight... My parents are on another date night and Hugo is with my grandparents..." Y/N said casually, some whimpers escaped from her mouth.

Shauna raised her head and locked her brown eyes on her new favourite colour. "I can arrange it, just let me call my mom." She muttered, this time Y/N let out a soft laugh, making Shauna frown. "What?" She asked while searching her phone.

"You don't need to hear it twice." Y/N sang, seeing Shauna roll her eyes. She knew that the yellowjacket player doesn't have a good relationship with their parents, any excuse to not spend time in that house is enough for her.

"I'm not letting you here all alone. I'm pity you, that's all." Shauna said in a fake seriousness, breaking it immediately when Y/N burst laughing, accusing her it was a lie. "Shut up woman and do the dinner. I'm going to call my mother." The brunette shushed her with a chaste kiss on her lips and standing up she walks quickly outside to avoid the cushion Y/N throws her way with a protest.

But Y/N stayed on her bed scrolling on her phone the minutes Shauna spoke with her mother. The brunette enters inside again and lay down. Y/N let her phone down and look at her with an apprehensive look. "Do you prefer to stay here and wait a little longer for dinner?" She offers, intertwining her right hand on her left.

Shauna nods and rubs with her free hand on her face, removing her hair with a frustrated sigh. Y/N leaned her head on her shoulder and looked at her. "You don't have the fault, whatever it is." She reminds her gently, knowing very well what she has on her mind for previous times. She let out a sight and leaned on her elbows, brushing her nose on her cheek until her lips were lined on hers, trying to distract her with her kisses.

It works, she could feel how Shauna slowly started to relax, the hand intertwined with hers letting it go to wrap the arm around her waist and bring her nearer, her other hand fly to her hair. Y/N broke the kiss when the air to her lungs was necessary, a loving gaze installed on her eyes when she looked at Shauna Shipman with her pink cheeks, swollen lips and an intense gaze.

The hand Shauna had on her hair travelled softly towards her left cheek, caressing it with her thumb. Y/N positioned on top of her, biting her lip, not breaking her gaze on her. Shauna's thumb lined her red swollen lips to release the pressure on the lip. She didn't know why but after a moment, her thumb was introduced to her mouth, gaining a low moan from Y/N. Eagerly, Shauna reincorporated enough to replace her thumb for her tongue, kissing her vehemently with a mix of lust. She changes the roles and now she is on top of her, supporting her weight with a hand on the mattress, near Y/N's head. Meanwhile, Y/N's hands tangled on her brunette hair and her legs were wrapping on her waist.

"It will be my first time..." Y/N shyly said when Shauna started to let wet mouth kisses on her neck, closing her eyes. Of course it made the girl on top of her stop.

After a few seconds and when Y/N started to regret what she said, Shauna grabs her hands Y/N took off from her hair to put on her eyes to hide from her. "It will be mine too..." She confessed in a whisper, making Y/N open her eyes and seeing the sincere look directed towards her. "We don't have to do anything, you know?"

Y/N softened when she heard Shauna say that.

They both pictured it very differently. Y/N always thought that maybe Charlotte Matthews would be the person doing this, and Shauna dreamed about it with Jackie. But now Y/N only could think about Shauna, about her poems, about her little noise she let out when she is pissed or annoyed by someone, about how always she worries about her or her friends, about how her mysterious brown eyes hide how truly she is. And then, she realised she is in love with Shauna Shipman. Deep down, Y/N knows this would be a mistake.

While they gaze at each other, both of them with waves on their minds, trying to let the peace calm their senses, they thought that maybe, it is worth taking the risk.

It's Shauna who made the bold move in a shy, but gentle manner. She kissed her slowly, savouring every part of her mouth, letting her know what she was feeling. After all, Shauna is not good at expressing her emotions with words.

"I want to make love to you." Shauna whispered in her mouth, her dilated pupils meeting their own.

Y/N smiled, pecking her lips. "Me too." Whispered back, brushing her nose with hers.

•••

The next day, Shauna woke up when the sun shined on her face. She let out a groan, hiding her head on the pillow. When she tried to move her arm, it was trapped at a heavy weight. Slowly, she opened one eye, adjusting to the natural light involving the room, then she opened the other, doing the same thing. Her eyes fell on the other person laying there, her naked back facing her. Memories from last night running to her mind and a silly smile finding a place in her mouth. Her arm is trapped under Y/N's body, she can't feel it and at the moment she doesn't care. She wrapped her other arm around her hip and pressed her chest on her back, hiding her head in the crook of her neck, pecking the skin there. When she was starting to drift off, Y/N stirred in her sleep and changed the position, now they are face to face.

It's Y/N's turn to wake up. She blinked a few times when opened her eyes for the first time that day and when she adjusted, an involuntary smile approached on her face. She scanned Shauna's features, the normal frown between her eyebrows was gone, replaced by a line. Her messy hair framing her sleeping face, Y/N moves her hand to her hair and with her index finger, she starts to play with a lock. Her eyes find the marks Y/N did last night on her neck, it's not too much, only two but notorious. She knew that herself had more and probably bigger, not only on her neck. A blush spread from her ears to her cheeks when without pretending her eyes fell on Shauna's chest, she removed eyes quickly.

"You love that I'm watching you, do you?" Y/N said in a hoarse voice, a hint of tease there. She saw Shauna's corner of her mouth up, clearly feeling her gaze on her body.

"Maybe, I don't want to interrupt your moment." Shauna said back, half laughing.

Before they could start with the bickering, Y/N was hungry, the proof was her stomach sounded, and knowing Shauna was too, she stood up and saw the green flannel laying on the floor, she grabbed it and put it on, covering her chest. Then, she went to grab some comfortable pants.

"What?" Y/N asked when saw Shauna gazing at her with hypnotic eyes, accompanied by a smile.

"I don't mind if you wear my clothes now." She teased, but secretly enjoyed the views.

Y/N showed her middle finger and indicated to her that she could grab clothes from her closet before disappearing to the kitchen.

The morning went well, Y/N's parents were working and they acted like a truly couple at breakfast. Shauna needed to come back to her house, for her dismay. So with a promise to Y/N to see her later in the theatre with the gang, the brunette stole a few kisses and marched away, too happy to not hide it when she entered on the dark living room.

•••

The following weeks, Shauna and Y/N acted like they were a couple. Their affection intensified, like Shauna approaching with a little bouquet of red roses with a poem she wrote. Y/N cooking for her because she knows Shauna likes how she cooks and gives her to take some to her house if she can't stay with her. And many more little details that are making not only Jackie insane, Natalie is happy for her friends but also sick to see the love that two profess and it didn't help when Misty Quigley rant about the couple, looking at them with an envious gaze but at the same time with amazement, weird in Nat's opinion, then she thinks is Misty and there's not another explanation.

For Y/N, November came with a tenderness and brighter feeling, even if the weather tried to tell her the contrary. She is happy when Shauna holds her hand every time they meet in the halls or when they sit down with their friends and keep on their little bubble, murmuring no sense with enamoured smiles on their faces.

But the downfall is coming and Y/N isn't ready for that.

It was on Thursday, usually Shauna had training that day of the week and Y/N had theatre class. That day was raining a lot, like if the sky was crying about all of them for something they still didn't know. Y/N walked to her locker to grab her math book to study later on her home, she closed it and when she turned her distracted mind came to a hold when saw the wet figure walking slowly towards her. A grin took power of her features seeing Shauna with her usual flannel, this time purple and also a little wet from the rain. Her hair was down, not caring about how wet it is. Y/N told her a few times she needed to dry it and especially at this period of time.

Shauna approached her with a nervous look and slow steps, a hand holding the lashes of her backpack. She held her breath when Y/N leaned to peck her lips, Shauna thought she didn't deserve Y/N. She removes her hair from her face and puts some strand of hair behind her ear, giving Y/N a lipped smile. Then Y/N grabbed her free hand to guide them outside, but Shauna remained in the empty hall.

"What? You forget something?" Y/N asks confused, still her smile on.

Shauna opened her mouth and closed it. She scratched her neck facing the floor. "I need to talk to you..." She whispers, her eyes coming back to Y/N face. Shauna played with the hand intertwined with hers, balancing it softly.

"Okay...?" Y/N chuckles confused, trying to decipher Shauna's behaviour. Sometimes it is really difficult for her to know what happens in her mind.

The brunette swallows hard, but decides it's time. "It's about Jackie." She whispers again, seeing how Y/N nods and remaining quiet to let her explain herself. "I told her everything." She is so cowardly that couldn't see her reaction at her confession. The hold on her hand loosen. She felt worse when Y/N asked the reason in a thread voice, she even didn't seem mad at her. "Jackie told me she is in love with me... And told her everything, about the plan we made." Her brown eyes were raised to explain and when she finished, Y/N painted a dry smile.

"Of course you did..." Y/N muttered, she could start to feel how the anger was building inside her. She bit her lip so hard that she could taste the blood from the newly cut. "That's what you care about me?" She asks, betrayed.

Shauna shakes her head quickly, a scared look on her face. "No, of course not! But we have a deal, right? We will stop the moment they confess to us." She knew that words should never be left her mouth. She cursed herself. She opened her mouth to speak again but Y/N raised her hand in front of her to stop her.

"I always knew that I would never compete with Jackie. I feel so dumb to let you in...," Y/N started to say in a betrayed voice, some tears escaping from her eyes. Shauna swallowed hard, hating herself for doing it to you. "I trust you, Shauna! I fucking fell for you and I thought it was mutual. I'm guessing now that it's not." Her voice was raised with every word, to Shauna it felt like a punch. A new word a new punch, and she knew she deserved it. "It took you three weeks to throw up my hope, my heart! Don't dare to look at me like that, you fucking hypocrite!" Y/N yelled more when Shauna tried to grab her hand. She stopped when Y/N moved aside, now her cheeks wet for her tears falling from her eyes. The words echo not only in the empty hall, in Shauna's head too.

"GO AWAY!!" Shauna jumped, some tears falling from her own eyes to see the person that actually loved her with her heart broken for her fault. She doubted, but walked away to let you have some space. She felt horrible, she was happy with her. Why did Jackie need to approach and confess when she truly was happy?

Y/N let her book fall to the floor, and leaned her back on the lockers. Her hands travelled to her face, sobs echoing. She hates herself for letting Shauna enter so deep in her heart. Her breath caught on her throat, a knot forming there.

"Y/N?" Someone called, Y/N turned to hide, now her face is looking at the lockers. She didn't know who it was, but wished the person left her alone. But the person had other plans and turned around, on her blurry vision she could see a tall figure looking at her with a worry expression. "You are having a panic attack. Follow my breath." Lottie grabs Y/N's face between her hands, making her look at her and copy her breathing. After a while, Lottie got Y/N to breathe normal again. Y/N hid on her chest, muttering incoherent things. Lottie wraps her arms around her waist and leans her head on top of hers, letting Y/N vent.

The tall brunette took Y/N outside, the rain pouring on them but Lottie took her to her car. They entered the back seat and just like the sky was pouring into the city, Y/N did the same thing with Lottie, wetting her yellow shirt. She didn't mind at all. "Shauna broke up with me..." Y/N says in a whisper.

"Why?" Lottie asked gently, playing with her hair. That simple question made Y/N squirm, a shadow of pink approaching on her cheeks.

Y/N sighed and thought that everything is fucked up, so why don't tell her the truth? "We made a plan to make Jackie and you jealous," she confessed, embarrassed. She saw how Lottie was surprised to hear it. "I always have a crush on you... And everyone knows about the crush Shauna has on Jackie. So we planned it, well I proposed it to her." She whispers, scratching her head nervously and avoiding Lottie's gaze. "We spent a lot of time together, in highschool and out of it. It changes in that party when Shauna scores and gives an assist." Y/N murmured, playing with her fingers on her lap. "We kissed that night. Since then, we can't stop making out. I fell in love with her Lottie..." She started to cry again. "We... I lost my virginity with her..." Lottie could hear her heartbeat in her ears, pounding. She wraps an arm around Y/N shoulders and hugs her. She has a lot of emotions right now, but Y/N needs her, and Lottie would do anything for that girl. "S-She told everything at Jackie the m-moment she confessed her feelings tow-wards her..." She stammered, wiping her cheeks while some sobs escaped from her mouth.

There's nothing Lottie could do or say something, she just holds her.

•••

Six months.

That's the time Shauna spoke to Y/N for the last time. She saw how little by little recomposed herself, with Lottie's help and move on. At first Shauna tried to approach her, but Lottie didn't let her. She tried on several occasions, and with a sad expression walked away when Lottie with a warning look stopped her.

Shauna saw how slowly, with patience and little details Lottie healed Y/N's heart. It hurt her how a morning Shauna went out of her car and before she could step inside, from a distance appreciate Lottie holding Y/N's face between her hands and kiss her, a shy smile approached her features, breaking her heart in the process.

During a match, Shauna was playing like shit, she thought how the hell did the coach sub her off. It worsened when Lottie scored and after celebrating with her teammates, the tall brunette ran with a grin towards the bleachers to kiss Y/N, all people there cheered the public affection. It really pissed Shauna.

The funny part is that Shauna never wanted to break up and in fact, was Y/N without realising who broke it. Shauna informed her about what happened, but never with other intentions. Jackie understood after she explained the whole thing, even if her own heart was broken in the process, she can't deny the way Shauna talks about Y/N. Since then, her best friend approached again and tried her best to help her, also trying to talk with Y/N herself, and with the same result as Shauna, Lottie with the experience from the previous months, didn't let her in fear of Jackie insulting Y/N.

Today, after six months, Shauna felt exhausted. She abandoned the training, not supporting anymore the constant yelling from her coach and failing simple drills, it didn't help too the pity looks towards her. Something she is glad about is that they stayed out of what happened, she didn't care if they criticized her on her back, she wanted peace for once.

With a frustrated sigh she slammed the door, the cleat resound in the empty changing room. Shauna walked towards her bench, sitting there. Her hands covered her face, tears streaming down. She felt so tired, about everything. The worst part is that she can't explain properly, only a person lets her and is the main reason for what happened.

Shauna was so lost in her mind that she didn't realise someone was entering. The person walked towards her and wrapped around her shoulders, startling her. The brunette removes her hands from her face and sees the last person she thought would see. Y/N gives her a lipped sad smile, Shauna's doe eyes not believing what she is seeing.

"What are you doing here?" She whispered, fearing she spoke loudly Y/N would disappear.

"Lottie texted me." Y/N whispered back, caressing her arm. Shauna leaned her head on her shoulder, smelling the aroma she missed like a crazy those months without her. "Everything okay at home?" She asked softly.

"Like always." Shauna admitted in a muffling voice. "Can I tell you something?" She shyly asks.

"Of course." Y/N reply, playing now with Shauna's messy bun.

"It's about that moment... I think you thought the wrong thing because I didn't explain correctly...," Shauna started to say without moving her head from her neck and pausing to let Y/N stop it if she felt uncomfortable. But she didn't. "I told Jackie everything, the full story. And what happened between the fake part of our relationship. I told her that for once in my life I was feeling happy, someone who thinks for herself and is encouraged by someone who supports me... For once I fell in love and this time didn't hurt, because it was pure and sincere from the start..." More tears fell from her eyes. Y/N grabbed her chin gently with a fear and sad look, an idea in her mind. She is crying too and before wipes her own tears, she raises her thumbs to her cheeks and wipes Shauna's.

"Shauna..." Y/N whispered, her breathing caught in her throat.

"I don't want to break up with you. I just wanted to inform you, and I know I was nervo-..." Y/N shushed her the moment Shauna let slip from her mouth what she feared to hear out loud.

"Why didn't you tell me before?" Y/N asked sadly, a hint of pain in her voice.

"I tried! But Lottie didn't let me and I don't blame her. She wanted to protect you, I would do the same thing..." Shauna admitted, wiping now Y/N's tears.

They spend a few minutes in silence, Shauna staring at her and Y/N at the floor, thinking. "I'm sorry..." Y/N start to say, looking at her. Shauna opened her mouth to say that she didn't need to apologise, but she didn't let her. "I don't want to hurt you. That's never my intention and finding it now makes me feel sick... I can't change what happened. I'm in love with Lottie. But believe me please when I told you that you made me fall in love with you. That's months with you were magical. You make me feel unique and special and I truly hope you find someone who deserves you."

Shauna sobs, throwing herself in Y/N's arms.

They hugged each other for a long time. The rest of the team finished the training and found them like that. Lottie gave Y/N a worry but reassuring look, and Jackie a wink with a grateful smile.

"I will always love you, Y/N." Shauna whispered.

"I will always love you too, Shauna Shipman." Y/N copied her.

"Shit, it really is a drama lesbian." Van muttered lowly, but the looks from the others tell her that they listened. Y/N and Shauna's soft laugh interrupted the tension.

i beg someone please make a character ai bot based off of this in any possible way 🙏🏾

I- I just noticed Jackie is smoking at the party... I can't stop thinking about sharing a fag while making out. That would be so fuckin hot

Shauna is definitely rolling her eyes and snickering at the two, but finding it really hot

WHAT THE FUCK.......THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.

she comes home late from practice and you can taste the cigarette on her tongue and lips when you make out...lighting up after hardcore sex (she did nothing but shes sooo tired she deserves it surely)

i need her so bad after finding this out like even more so.

i wish there was a movie like summer of 84 + super 8 combined so bad

NowWatching:

Summer of 84 (2018)

"After suspecting that their police officer neighbor is a serial killer, a group of teenage friends spend their summer spying on him and gathering evidence, but as they get closer to discovering the truth, things get dangerous."

Summer of Horror

VOTE THE SHAUNA ONE I ACTUALLY BEGGG

𝐇𝐢𝐢 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬💋!!

realest headcanon yet

dating jackie taylor headcanons

(jackie taylor x m!reader)

she leaves you for a girl

that's it! have a nice one x

THATS MY SHAUNA SHIPMAN BOT OH MY GOD??

Do you have any other yellowjackets bot recommendations 😔 there aren't many good ones (Besides yours, holy fuck.)

My personal favs!! 🙏

Lottie Matthews - https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=_wY0X_MZ8rU4kai4eCt2jp7aPP8WzNffpWFQ9RkiIQ4 , https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=kK_anqI3JSbvjjoGyzULRcxA4WmmKsm9vI_1RcEZ-sA , https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=cQeTlB-N6hlvJLp8XkZU21lAolv_KwUKWSuaAmoTatU , https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=nA51u3FXFq7Ci4my-7p2u6FgwD9JIYtD8zLsQRa_ey8

Natalie Scatorccio - https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=Gh7iazOgCDZXKnQJf0Yk0FQbFaOR5862sdzJig41d0w , https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=kPkEhdmU53gv5DocvO8kHUf49vkXq-St6IRx3D9b8lI , https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=YMJi6o6TTHAlVOba1e5puGYoJtEFdnpCy7R2ToKeVko

Shauna Shipman - https://beta.character.ai/chat?char=RQvFdHRumnax4lSScDlBAFd5eShasUdh-ZCqbma_ra4 (Not very many for her ☹️)

natalie scatorccio ily

Walker Scobell as Percy Jackson | Percy Jackson and the Olympians

Your dad's calling.

PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS (2023-) S01E02 | "I Become Supreme Lord of the Bathroom"

this is amazing, chefs kiss even

'tis the damn season

Summary: “You hadn’t seen Nat since the two of you screamed at each other outside Lottie Matthews graduation party, but you can’t deny that you’ve missed her dearly. Long before she was your girlfriend she was your best friend, and when you're given the chance to hang out with her while you're home from college for the holidays you jump at the opportunity no matter how unique the circumstances. When the two of you have to work together to solve a surprising mystery, maybe a few truths about what really went down between you will be revealed along the way.”

December 23rd, 1996

You’ve been home from college for a grand total of 10 days before they’ve started to run together. You’ve been drifting in and out of sleep on the couch for the last few hours, Christmas movies playing quietly in the background. You're just on the edge of sleep when your mom walks up to shake you awake. You groan softly as you bury your head further into the cushion, but get up quick enough to give you a headrush when your mom tells you someone’s calling for you. Thank God, You think. You were dying of boredom. You’ve seen a lot of your high school friends since you’ve been back, but they all remind you of her. You still can’t gather the nerve to call the one you really want to talk to, so you're more than willing to accept the distraction the phone call provides.

You grab the receiver from the table and lean lazily against the wall as you answer. “Hey.”

“Hey,” You hear a familiar voice say.

“Lottie!” You greet happily, twisting the cord aimlessly around your finger as you speak. “Do you want to hang out later? I know we just saw each other the other day b-”

“I think someone's been following me,” Lottie interrupts quickly, sounding noticeably anxious. Your eyes widen slightly in surprise as you immediately straighten up. “Can you come get me? I don't want to be alone.” She asks pleadingly. 

“Absolutely,” You promise immediately. “Just let me get changed and I’ll be right there.” You exchange a quick goodbye as Lottie seems obviously distracted as you run to your room to change. 

What the fuck is happening? You wonder as you hurry out to your car.

You get a bad feeling as you drive to her house, but you do your best to ignore it as you break almost every traffic law known to man on the drive there. It’s ominously quiet as you pull up, her family home seeming somehow more imposing than usual. You shut the door of your car as you start walking up the driveway, only to be interrupted by a voice calling out your name. 

“Y/N?” Nat calls out in disbelief. You whirl around in surprise as you watch her standing at the base of the driveway. You bury your hands in your pockets to hide the way they shake with your nervousness. You weren’t prepared to see her today, not that you thought you ever would be. You exhale shakily as you look her up and down. She looks just as good as always, maybe even better than usual. Your eyes glance down at her nails, noticing their unusually bare state. You barely remember a time when they weren’t painted black, but maybe all things change over time.

She seems annoyed to see you, making you grin slightly at the familiar sight even if it’s never been directed in your direction before. You knew Nat was just as nervous to see you as you were to see her. You think you might know Nat better than you know yourself, or you did at one point. Your smile fades at the thought.

“What are you doing here?” You both ask at once. You laugh softly as you look down, catching the way Nat kicks nervously at the ground. The familiar sight of her boots fills you with confidence as you look back up at her.

“Lottie called me. Said someone was following her?” You say. Nat scoffs, raising a hand to run it messily through her hair.

“Said the same shit to me,” Nat complains. You glance up at Lottie’s house, suddenly getting suspicious. Lottie’s tried more than once to convince the two of you to start speaking again after you broke up, but her pleas always fell on deaf ears. You knew it must be awkward to be stuck in the middle of the two of you, but as much as you felt for Lottie’s predicament you thought manipulating you like this was too fucking far. Nat gives you a wry look as she follows your gaze, rolling her eyes as she turns and starts walking down the street.

“You're not going to make sure?” You ask.

Nat huffs. “It’s obvious what happened, isn’t it? Lottie not minding her own fucking business.”

You stare up at the house a little unsurely. “That doesn’t sound like Lottie.” You say, unable to stifle your concern. You and Nat catch each other's gaze for the first time in months, and you think you might miss her more 10 feet away from her than you ever have before. You suspect Nat feels the same as she quickly breaks your eye contact, looking uncharacteristically shy as she scuffs her boot against the ground.

“Yeah, well people change don’t they.” She accuses pointedly. You scoff, storming back up to your car. You weren’t sure what crawled up Nat’s ass all those months ago, but it's certainly still there.

“Go fuck yourself, Natty.” You jeer, throwing the door of your car open. You climb back in as you forget about whatever Lottie thought she was pulling as you turn your anger at Nat instead. You slam the door shut, resting your head against the steering wheel. You exhale slowly as you try to calm down. Nat’s always been able to get to you like this, even when no one else could. It’s one of the things you loved about her. Love about her, you admit even if only in the privacy of your own head.

You stare at her in the side mirror as she stands in the same place you left her in. She looks strangely guilty, but you know better than to expect an apology from her. Nat almost never apologized to anyone even if she thought she should, prideful to a fault. You used to be the one exception but you won't hold your breath anymore. You sigh quietly as you back out of the driveway around Nat. You roll your window down next to her as she stares expressionlessly at you. “Do you need a ride home?” She pauses for a second as she considers it, but slowly shakes her head. You nod easily, not bothering to fight her against it as you drive down the street. 

You don’t look back, no matter how much you want to. You miss the way she watches you all the way down the street; The way she watches you until you finally turn off the street, disappearing from view.

…

September 7th, 1986

Even now you remember how upset you were when your dad up and moved your entire family across the country right before you started the third grade. To New Jersey of all places. You weren’t really sure why moving to New Jersey was a bad thing, but your best friend Kaitlin had told you that her mother said it was. So in your mind, there was no place on Earth worse than New Jersey if even your best friend thought so. Thinking about your best friend only made you angrier knowing you wouldn’t get to see her again.

You were brooding the whole way to your desk, righteously angry in the way only an eight-year-old could be when you caught curious eyes looking up at you. You returned her curious look even as you moodily took your seat. There was something about her that caught your eye even then. You didn’t exchange a single word but you still felt a strange sense of comradery with her. You stormed off during recess to go angrily kick at the tree, deciding that that was a far better use of your time than sitting with someone from stupid New Jersey.

You're too far away to hear it at first, but it catches your attention as the catcalling gets louder. You see a couple kids surrounding your desk mate, obviously making fun of her. You weren’t sure what ‘trailer trash’ meant, but it was obvious by the look on her face that she knew. You weren’t sure even now what caused you to storm over there and grab the ringleader by the back of the shirt and whirl him around. Maybe you were angry and he just happened to be there, or maybe you knew even then how important Nat would be to you. You slammed your little fist into his cheek, sending him sprawling to the ground in surprise. 

He starts crying loudly, immediately garnering the attention of your teacher who starts walking over from across the playground. You stare down at your hand in surprise: You’d never been particularly violent before and hadn’t realized it was going to hurt your hand this much. A pale hand reaches out and grabs you, turning your wrist over so she can see your red knuckles. She grins toothily up at you, her grin slightly crooked. “I’m Nat.” She says.

“Y/N.” You say, a little teary-eyed from the pain. You smile back weakly as your teacher drags you away from them and to the office. You don’t get in nearly as much trouble as you should considering it’s your first day, but you certainly wouldn’t complain. You get sent back just in time for lunch, looking around unsurely until you see Nat waving you over. You practically skip over to take your seat next to her. You talk for the rest of lunch and hold hands on the way back to class. From that moment on you were inseparable. 

Maybe New Jersey wouldn't be as bad as Kaitlin said.

…

December 24th, 1996. 

You stare guiltily down at the phone as you get Lottie’s answering machine for the third time in a row. You were positive that Lottie was just setting you and Nat up, but the longer she went without calling you back the more worried you became. Certainly, it wouldn’t hurt if you just stopped by just in case, right? You set the phone back down on the receiver as you exhale shakily, unable to calm your racing heart. You try to shake it off as you walk out to your car Maybe you were less sure about Lottie being okay than you thought. You would just stop by her house and yell at her a bit, and then you could guilt her into watching your favorite movie and everything would be just fine. Still, your hands shake the entire drive there.

You walk purposely up the drive, pulling your jacket tighter around you in an effort to fight the cold. You knock firmly on Lottie’s door as you shiver on the porch. The longer you go without an answer the more frantic you knock until you're banging your fists against Lottie’s door. “Y/N!” Nat calls out, making you whirl around in surprise. You don’t even want to imagine what you look like right now, how wild and crazed your expression must look, as you quickly walk towards Nat.

“Have you…” You both start, trailing off as you realize Nat hasn’t spoken to Lottie either.

“I’ve been banging on her door for the last five minutes and she hasn’t answered.” You say nervously, glancing back at Lottie’s empty-looking house. You look at Nat in disbelief as she reaches around you to try the door handle, finding it locked. “If only I would have thought of that.” You snark. Nat shrugs, holding her hands up placatingly as she spins around and starts walking around the side of the house. 

You reluctantly walk after her, watching curiously as she tries all of the ground-floor windows. You end up back at the front door after fruitlessly trying every window and the backdoor. You sigh as you start looking around for a fake-looking rock or something. You catch Nat giving you a curious look out of the corner of your eye. “Maybe they have one of those hidden keys or whatever?” You suggest, squatting down to look closer at the welcome mat.

“Oh shit, you’re right,” Nat says wryly. “I found it.” You grin widely as you stand back up, backing up so she can unlock the door. Your eyes widen in horror as Nat smashes the glass of the front door with a heavy-looking rock she found on the ground. You stare down at the rock on the floor of Lottie’s living room in disbelief, slowly turning your head to look at Nat. Nat shrugs, looking proud of her little joke, as she carefully reaches through the newly installed hole in the door to unlock it from the inside. The two of you step over broken glass as you trudge your way up the stairs, heart jumping further and further up your throat the longer your presence goes without answer.

You step into Lottie’s room behind Nat, finding it just as empty as the rest of the house. “Maybe she just went out?” Nat suggests, seeming as if she doesn’t believe it herself.

“She always gives her driver Christmas off.” You say anxiously

“Maybe she walked?”

“Without her shoes?” You gesture to Lottie’s favorite pair of shoes lying by the door. “Without her purse?”

Nat nods stiffly as she dumps Lottie’s purse out on the bed, riffling through the contents hoping to find something indicating her location. You exit Lottie’s room and check the rest of her house as quickly as you can, still finding no sign of her. You catch Nat waiting for you outside of the room, staring anxiously at you as you shake your head. The lack of Lottie’s presence combined with the panicked phone call you received the other day paints a disturbing picture. Judging by the look of concern on Nat’s face you can tell she feels the same.

You quickly make your way back downstairs, making a beeline for the phone as you race to call the police. You tell the story to the officer, taking great care to leave the breaking and entering out much to Nat’s quiet amusement. There’s a long moment of silence after you finish and you hear the officer take in a shaky breath as he says, “Are you sure she didn’t just run away? She’s an adult, you know.” You scoff, immediately drawing Nat’s attention as she leans in closer trying to listen in.

“Lottie wouldn’t just run away like that, especially after that phone call she made.” You immediately refute, not even humoring the idea. Nat starts to nod in agreement, wincing halfway through as she realizes he can’t actually see her.

“Look.” He says, voice sounding annoyed. “There’s nothing we can do until she's gone 48 hours, and you're going to have a hell of a time getting someone to come out there on Christmas to look for her.” You’re almost positive he had more to say, but you slam the phone back down on the receiver so hard you're surprised it didn’t crack. You look over at Nat teary-eyed as you try pointlessly to blink away your tears. She instinctively draws you into her arms, wrapping them tightly around you just like she always has. You freeze in her arms, not having the luxury of muscle memory to explain it away. You bury your head in her shoulder anyway, soaking up any comfort offered to you in your moment of need.

Nat tenses up as she becomes aware of her position, but she still holds you tightly until you get yourself calm again. You clear your throat as you pull away from her, wiping the lingering tears away with your hand. Nat shifts her weight from foot to foot as she looks anywhere in the room but directly at you. You can’t help but laugh at the pure awkwardness of the situation, and Nat quickly joins you. When your laughter finally dies off the two of you share a look as you seem to come to a mutual agreement. If they wouldn’t look for Lottie, it seems that you’d have to do it yourselves.

…

December 27th, 1992

You’d rushed your mom into going to pick Nat up the second your extended family fucked back off to their own houses, feeling like you were going through withdrawal from not seeing your best friend for so long. Nat had come running down the street to meet you, equally as excited to see you. She’s been enraptured by your new gameboy and you were all too happy to let her play around with it. Nat lies back on your bed focusing intently as she frantically presses buttons. You sit next to her watching fondly as she gets her ass kicked at Tetris again. “Fuck!” She curses, a moody look on her face as she sets it down on the nightstand. Your face twitches in amusement trying desperately not to laugh, but Nat gives you a dirty look anyway as she crosses her arms over her chest.

You reach over her to grab it off the nightstand, giving her a smug look as you turn it back on. “I’ll show you a master at work.” You tease. Nat scoffs but dutifully looks over your shoulder as you play. Her mood gets more and more sour the longer you play as you blow her score out of the water. She puts her hand on your leg to support her weight as she leans closer to watch the small screen more carefully. You tense slightly as you try to pretend it doesn’t make you nervous that she’s close enough that you can almost feel her breath against you. You weren’t sure when you’d developed a crush on your best friend, but you desperately wished it would stop. The two of you had only gotten closer since high school had started a few months ago and your weird responses to Nat were only getting more noticeable as time went on.

You nearly breathe a sigh of relief as you finally reach the cap of your skill level and lose the game. Nat hums as she leans back away from you, crossing her legs underneath herself as she looks at you. “You’ve had more practice.” She accuses, ever the sore loser. You shrug in acceptance even though you haven’t actually started this game yet, being much more concerned with playing Super Mario Land. What Nat didn’t know certainly wouldn’t hurt you.

“If you say so, Natty.” You grin in anticipation, knowing what’s coming.

“Don’t call me that!” She grumbles immediately as she gives you a weak glare.

“Since when are you too cool to be my Natty?” You tease. Nat flushes slightly, pale cheeks going bright red as she turns away from you. One of your favorite things about Nat was the way she would blush to her ears at the slightest embarrassment, though you figured she probably couldn’t help it.

“Shut up.” She mutters. You concede easily as you start a new game. Nat glances up at sees you’re playing again.

“You’ve had enough practice,” Nat complains, reaching to grab it out of your hand. You move it further out of her reach as you grin playfully at her. You’ve lost interest in the game itself, much more interested in her desire to play it herself. You wiggle it just out of her reach as you taunt her with it. She scoffs and lunges at you so fast that she reaches you before you even realize she’s moved. Nat catches you by surprise as she overshoots and sends the both of you sprawling to the ground.

You groan breathlessly as the fall knocks the air out of your lungs. Nat hisses in pain as she rubs at her knee that she banged against the ground. As you catch your breath your eyes go wide as you realize the position you’ve found yourselves in. Nat lies fully on top of you with her arm still stretched fruitlessly out over your shoulder. You’ve got one hand trapped between the two of you, and the other stretched up still keeping the Gameboy out of her reach. Nat groans as she slowly shifts up to her knees, leaving her straddling you. Your breath gets caught in your throat for a different reason as you look up at her, Gameboy more than forgotten.

Nat’s got a strange look on her face as she looks down at you, her eyes fixating on your lips. 

“Hey.” She murmurs shyly, trying to gauge your mood.

“Hey.” You murmur back, slowly raising your now-freed hand to her cheek. She gives you a crooked grin as she leans down to kiss you for the first time, but certainly not the last.

…

December 24th, 1996. 

The longer you’ve been driving around town the more you realize just how much of Wiskayok reminds you of Nat. There’s nowhere you’ve looked for Lottie that you don’t associate with memories of Nat, no matter how weak the connection may be. With a town this small it’s hard to escape from anyone no matter how much you want to. During the awful few weeks between when you and Nat broke up and when you left for college, you found yourself almost haunted by the sheer amount of memories you were unable to separate her from. It almost makes you feel a little bad for her, knowing she has to live in them all the time.

As you pull up to the stop sign you can’t help but grin at the site of the old playground. Nat smiles slightly at the sight, turning her head to better get a look at it. It hasn’t aged well, the dilapidated wood and peeling paint not doing it any favors, but that’s not the important part. This mess of rotting wood and rusted swings holds some of your fondest memories, all of them involving Nat. “Do you remember,” You start, but Nat soon interrupts.

“The time when we pushed Jackie down the slide when she wasn’t ready?” She says with a wide grin.

You laugh loudly at the memory, nodding in agreement. “We had to spend the rest of recess running away from Shauna.” You reminisce fondly.

“God, she was fucking fast.” Nat comments.

“She was Princess Jackie’s loyal defender. No one could doubt her prowess.” You add, knowing it would get under Nat’s skin. Nat had always loved pretending to be Princess Lottie’s knight as a kid, always dragging you into it even though you’d rather be on the swings. Lottie and Jackie would sit up on the swings watching the rest of you duke it out for their amusement. Nat and Shauna had often gotten into mock battles as kids that Nat always seemed to lose by herself, no matter how hard she tried. Eventually, she always dragged you into it so she could win, uncaring of the way Shauna and Jackie would accuse her of cheating. Nat wasn’t one to play fairly as a kid, even if she later grew out of it.

Nat scoffs, turning fully in her seat to face you again. You turn your blinker on innocently, watching her fume out of the corner of your eye as you finally let your foot off the break. “Just because she was willing to bite people doesn’t mean she was a better knight than me.” Nat defends with just a hint of a pout. “She was ruthless.”

“Of course. Could you find it in your heart to forgive me Sir Scatorccio?” You tease. Nat grins, chest puffing up in an imitation of pride.

“Don’t doubt me again.” She warns playfully. 

You pull into the gas station to fill up your car, finally coming to the bright idea of trying to call any of Lottie’s other friends to see if she was with any of them. You fiddle with your loose chain for a minute, pulling out a handful of quarters as you head to the phone booth. Nat looks slightly impressed at the idea, following you over and leaning against the wall next to you as you begin dialing.

You roll your eyes as Nat's shivers start turning into shaking as she stubbornly crosses her arms against the cold. You shift your shoulder up to keep the phone pressed against your ear as you start rummaging around your pocket for your keys. Your fingers are numb enough that you nearly drop them as you get them out, flailing slightly with your hands as you finally manage to get a grip on them. You hold them out to Nat by your car key and point her toward the backseat. She gives you a confused look as she mouths the word what, careful not to interrupt your conversation. 

You cross your arms over your chest as you mimic being cold, and point back at your car. Her eyes widen slightly as she looks over, slowly walking up to the car and looking in the backseat. She gives you an unreadable look as she pulls out her favorite of your jackets and slips it over her shoulders; The jacket you always kept in the backseat for her because she constantly forgot to bring a thicker one. Nat zips it up as she leans against the car with her arms crossed against her chest. She doesn’t say anything, but you know her well enough to know by the small twitch of her lips that she’s a little pleased it’s still there. You turn further into the phone booth to hide a grin of your own, though it slowly falls as Shauna confirms that she and Jackie hadn’t seen Lottie either. 

You hang up the phone as you turn to face Nat, slowly shaking your head as you walk over. Nat’s face falls, a slightly stricken look taking its place. You’ve called basically everyone that Lottie knows, and still nothing. Honestly, you were starting to give up hope that you’d be able to find Lottie anytime by yourselves but you weren’t quite ready to admit it yet. “What now?” You ask Nat. She shrugs, pulling the jacket tighter around her. “We could try driving around, I guess?” You prompt, but she just shrugs again.

You scoff as you run your fingers frustratedly through your hair. “Nothing to say, Nat? That seems to be a common problem.” You accuse.

She scoffs as she pushes herself off the car to get in your face. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean, Y/N?” Nat asks gruffly.

You stare her down unafraid: Nat was generally all talk as far as you were concerned. “Just that your inability to communicate hasn’t changed while I was gone.” You knew damn well that you were blowing her little shrug out of proportion, but you’d been holding on to this anger longer than you’d care to admit.

“You seriously want to do this right now?” She asks, throwing her arms out dramatically to gesture around.

“When else are we going to do it, Nat? Why won’t you ever just fucking talk to me?” You spit out frustratedly. The two of you stare each other down for a long moment before Nat seems to deflate. She turns away and storms off to the car, sitting down and slamming the door behind her.

You take a minute to calm down before climbing back in the car yourself. You start the car without even looking at her, knowing you’d only make yourself angry again. “I don’t want to talk about it,” Nat says quietly.

“Sure. Whatever.” You say simply, pulling out of the gas station as you get back to looking for Lottie. You hope you find her soon: both because you’re worried about her, and so you can get away from Nat once and for all. If she wanted to be stubborn she could be stubborn, you were sick and tired of trying to reach out to her only to get shot down. If she wants to be miserable and alone so badly, who are you to stop her? You fume in silence.

…

June 18th, 1996

Your smile is a little strained as you walk up to your girlfriend, a little hesitant about what her mood is going to be like. You weren’t sure what was up with Nat recently, but she’d really been worrying you. Her mood was prone to change on a dime and she was more emotional than you’ve ever seen her. The closer you got to her the more sour her expression looked. Fucking great, You thought wryly. You held her cup out for her and she accepts it without comment, throwing her head back and drinking it in one gulp. Your eyes widen as you slowly sip at your own drink, taking your place leaning against the tree next to her as you watch the rest of the party.

Neither of you had really wanted to come out to the party tonight, but you knew that Lottie’s graduation party was one of the last times you and your friends would all be in the same place at the same time. Normally you’d just assume not wanting to be here is what has her so annoyed, but she had seemed perfectly happy when she was talking to Lottie earlier. You haven’t much liked how insecure Nat was making you feel lately, but you were going to wait until things calmed down a bit to bring it up. There was so much going on with school ending that you haven’t had the chance to bring it up.

You tentatively lean your head against Nat’s shoulder, feeling the way her body tenses underneath you. You sigh quietly as you decide to leave Nat to her own brooding, pushing off the tree as you begin to walk away. She stops you in your tracks with a hand wrapped loosely around your wrist, gently spinning you around. 

“We need to talk,” Nat says seriously, an unreadable expression on her face. You glance around the party to make sure no one’s close enough to hear you before you respond.

“You want to do it here?” You ask in disbelief. Nat shrugs, fingertips tapping rhythmlessly against her cup. “Fine, Nat. I don’t like how distant you’ve been lately.” You say firmly, still questioning Nat’s decision to hash this out in the middle of the party. She scoffs derisively.

“I haven’t been distant.” Nat refutes, “You’ve just been so fucking clingy.” Your eyes go wide in shock. Never in your entire life has Nat spoken to you like this.

“What the fuck did you just say to me?” You ask in disbelief, your voice getting louder with each word until you're practically yelling at her. You can tell the parties almost come to a stop around you but you can’t bring yourself to care.

“I said,” Nat continues as her voice rises to meet yours, “That you’ve been all over me recently! You won’t even let me breathe without commenting on it.” As angry as you are you can’t help but glance nervously around the party as the comment gets a little too close to revealing the nature of your relationship. Lottie seems to be corralling everyone into the house and smiles awkwardly when you give her a grateful look.

“Don’t act like I’m being crazy, Nat! You’ve been pulling away from me and you know it!” You accuse pointedly.

“Maybe I’m just getting tired of doing the same old thing all the time!” Nat yells back.

“Oh? Am I boring you now?” You ask mockingly. “Poor Natty and her boring little girlfriend, huh?”

“We’ve been doing the same damn thing since we were kids! You can’t tell me it isn’t getting old!” Nat shoots back.

Your face falls as you stare back at her with an undeniably hurt look on your face. “Getting old?” You ask quietly as if you’d lost all of the fire you’d had a minute ago with just one remark. Nat nods solemnly, looking down at the floor so that she doesn’t have to look you in the eyes.

“I think we should break up.” Nat rushes out as if she’s ripping a bandaid off.

“Break up?” You ask quietly, almost in disbelief.

“We’ve been growing apart,” Nat says simply as if that’s the only reason she needs to break up your four-year relationship. As if that’s the only reason she needs to walk away from your 10-year-old friendship.

“We’re different people. We grow apart all the time Nat, but we always come back together. That’s what we do.” You can barely get it out, so desperate that it verges on a whisper.

“Not this time,” Nat says sadly, shaking her head.

You focus on her chipped black nail polish as you try not to cry. You’d done it for her, you always have ever since you were kids; Nat never had the patience to do it herself, always getting nail polish all over her fingers as she impatiently tried to rush through it. You still remember the first time she’d asked fondly, Nat sheepishly handing you the bottle of dime-store black nail polish you’d picked up for her. It's been a while since she asked you to do it, but you don’t think you were truly aware of just how long it’s been until now. You wonder how long she’s been planning on breaking up with you; Was she thinking about how to let you down easy while you were scheming on how to sneak her into your dorm room? Was she grinning along at your idea of regularly scheduled calls while knowing in the back of her mind that she'd never make them? 

You think the worst part is the premeditation of it all. Had she just sprung it on you that would be one thing, but it's clear from her moods and the way she's speaking that she's been practicing this conversation. It stings more than you thought it would, not that you'd ever imagined the two of you breaking up. Nat was your person, she always has been ever since you moved here. You barely remember a time before her, and now you're going to have to live without her?

“Fuck you.” You choke out, turning around and storming off deeper into the party as you try to wipe away your tears. You miss the way Nat’s hand twitches after you as if she's resisting the urge to stop you. You never see the look of regret on Nat’s face that remains long after you disappear from view.

…

December 24th, 1996. 

Your bad mood lasts long after the moment passes, still looking around as you drive off to the last place you can think of that Lottie might go to. Misty was the only one who hadn’t answered the phone, and while you're doubtful that Lottie would go there willingly you still hoped that at the very least Misty would be able to help you find her. Misty always seemed to know things that everyone else didn’t, even when you were children.

The two of you drive in a slightly uncomfortable silence broken only by the sound of your blinker as you navigate your way across town. The longer you drive the more you notice the way Nat’s eyes always seem to dart away just as you have to look in her direction. Her gaze is a little unnerving now, even if it never used to be. “What is it?” You ask finally, growing tired of her little game.

“What are you talking about?” Nat deflects immediately, too soon to be anything but suspicious. You sigh, pulling your car off to the side of the road as you decide to confront her.

“You’re staring.” You accuse gently, giving Nat a curious look.

“So what? You look nice.” She admits with a shrug as if it isn’t a big deal. You can’t help but grow a little angry at the admission, your face twisting as a result of your mood. Nat’s eyes widen as she tries to mentally review what she could have done to upset you.

“I look nice?” You ask dangerously. Nat nods unsurely, feeling like she’s walking into a trap. “You like my outfit?” Nat nods again, fingers tapping anxiously against her thighs. “You don’t think it’s too boring?” Nat winces at the reminder, immediately turning to look out the window as she finds herself unable to meet your eyes. You scoff at the uncharacteristic display of cowardice. You aren’t sure what changed with Nat, but you desperately wished she’d get over it. You’d forgive her in a second if she just bothered to ask you for it.

“I don’t think you’re boring,” Nat says, leaning her head against the window as she looks at you.

“Change your mind so soon? It seemed pretty important a few months ago.” You remark bitterly, stuffing your hands in your pockets in an attempt to fight the cold creeping in.

“Well you’re so worldly now, aren’t you?” Nat jokes weakly, “With your college education and your cool new friends.”

You give Nat a weird look. “I’ve been at college for one semester, Nat.”

“Yeah, but I’m sure you’ve got those college girls lined up down the hall right?” Nat says with a strained smile. You shrug listlessly.

“Haven’t really been interested in dating.” 

Nat’s fingers clench into a fist as she stares down at her lap. “You haven’t… Haven’t wanted to be with anyone else?”

You sigh. “Not really, Nat. They’re not…” You trail off as you try to search for the right words, but can’t seem to find any that fit. “They’re not what I want.” You say finally.

Nat inhales sharply at the admission, looking strangely angry as she stares up at you. “No one? No one at all?” She asks.

“What are you going on about?” You ask her annoyedly. “It’s not like it’s any of your business, Nat. Not anymore.”

Nat deflates at the comment, hands unclenching as she leans back in her seat. She looks devastated as she stares over at you, seemingly lost in a way that you haven’t seen since her dad died. “It was for nothing, then?” She asks, quiet enough that you don’t think you were supposed to hear her.

“What was?”

“I didn’t want to hold you back,” Nat admits quietly. You stare at her in shock as you contemplate what she’s just said. Out of all the self-sacrificing bullshit she could have pulled, this is what she decided on? You’d be angrier if it didn’t make you so fucking sad at the thought of it; Leave it to Nat to break both of your hearts because she was being self-deprecating again.

“You broke up with me to do me a favor? Is that it?” You demand bitterly.

“You're leaving this fucking town, Y/N. You didn’t need me to drag you down with me.” You roll your eyes at her excuse– because that’s all it was, an excuse. Not even a particularly good one, certainly not the truth.

“Since when do we lie to each other, Nat? You started at the party and can't seem to bring yourself to stop can you?” You accuse.

Nat mirrors your look of anger as she stares you down in return. Nat was always too stubborn for her own good, always getting herself into trouble because of it. The longer you sit in heated silence the more Nat seems to calm down, until finally she sighs as she looks at you defeatedly. 

“What was I supposed to offer you?” She asks softly.

You give her a questioning look as you feel like you’re finally making some progress, eyes widening at the sight of tears welling up in the corners of her eyes. She clears her throat pointedly as she wipes at her eyes with the back of her hand in an attempt to erase the evidence of her outburst. “You were going across the state to all those smart girls that you can talk nerd shit to.” She offers weakly, “I was afraid you were leaving me behind.”

“You were afraid I was going to break up with you, so you broke up with me first?” You ask in confusion.

“I didn’t think you’d break up with me.” She admits. “I was worried you’d resent me for it.”

“Why didn’t you just talk to me about it, Natty? Like adults?”

She laughs wetly, giving you a wry grin. “I wasn’t exactly self-aware about it when I did it. Honestly, Lottie was the one who told me about it.” You snicker, running your hand through your hair as you look at her fondly.

“Lottie does seem to have a sixth sense for these kinds of things.” You admit with a small smile. You stare at her for a long moment as you consider it in your head. Nat hurt you pretty bad, but she’s always been bad with her emotions. You don’t think she meant to be as malicious as she was, but the fact of the matter is that it still happened. “I need you to say it.”

She tilts her head in confusion before her eyes widen in realization. “Oh.” She murmurs quietly, sitting up straight as she gives you her full attention. “I was being stupid, and I’m really sorry about it.”

You hum teasingly, tilting your head to the side with a playful grin on your face. “I don’t think I’m feeling it.” You say.

Nat smirks as she holds her hands together in front of her as if she was begging. “Please, oh please could you ever find it in yourself to forgive me?” She pleads, sticking her lip out in an exaggerated pout. She’s playing along because you want her to, but you can see how relieved she looks. You sigh dramatically, never able to resist matching her energy.

“I think I just might.” You say, serious even in your playful tone. Nat nods, ever-present smirk never leaving her face for a second. You watch as her eyes slowly lower to your lips, tilting her head in question.

You lean in close to her so that your lips are just centimeters apart. “We should talk some more, later.” You murmur seriously. She hums in acknowledgment and you finally allow yourself to close the distance, meeting her in a gentle kiss. You’ve missed the way she felt, the way her lips moved against you. You pull back to speak again, but Nat just follows along as she refuses to let you break away from her again. She’s nearly straddling you as she leans over the center console, stretching unsteadily to reach you as you keep backing your head up. You wince as you smack your head against the window, Nat finally pulling away to laugh at your expense. You mock her laugh in a high-pitched voice which only serves to set her off further. You roll your eyes at the sight, but can’t help the warm feelings it brings. Maybe there was such a thing as 

Christmas magic, but then again it was still the 24th.

Oh shit. You think. You smack Nat gently on the arm. She rubs at it exaggeratedly as she gives you an offended look.

“Lottie.” You remind her.

“Oh shit,” Nat exclaims, pulling away so she can put her seatbelt back on. “Here’s hoping Quigley has the answer.” She mutters, not sounding excited in the slightest.

…

December 24th, 1996. 

You stand with Nat outside of Misty’s door as both of you trade imploring looks back and forth trying to get the other to knock. You’d usually bring out old reliable by now, rock paper scissors, but neither of you was willing to let go of the other’s hand to do it. Nat finally seems to give in, rolling her eyes as she raises her free hand to knock, but the door swings open before her fist can meet the wood to reveal Misty’s wild smile.

“Hi, guys!” Misty greets happily, gasping in excitement as her eyes land on your interlocked hands. She claps her hands together excitedly as she invites you in. “I’m so glad that you’ve gotten back together!” 

You and Nat exchange slightly panicked looks as it wasn’t exactly common knowledge. You look wide-eyed at Misty and she seems to catch on to this. “Oh,” Misty says with a touch of awkwardness, pushing her glasses further up her nose. “You notice a lot of things as the equipment manager.” She nods as if that’s a super obvious and normal thing to say as she leads you further into her house. You nod unsurely in agreement, utterly unconvinced but not wanting to further push the issue when you need her help. You like Misty well enough, but she has a troubling habit of knowing things about you that you don’t necessarily want her to. Still, you figure that there’s no one better to go to in a crisis.

“Thanks for inviting us in, Misty. We just wanted to know if you know anything-” You start, but are quickly interrupted by Nat.

“Holy shit!” Nat exclaims, pointing at the couch. You stare dumbfounded at a bound Lottie sitting on the couch. Her hands are tied in front of her with a tie as she sips at a mug of hot chocolate. Lottie raises one of her hands slightly in greeting as she shoots Misty a supremely annoyed look. “What the fuck?” Nat asks.

You let go of Nat’s hands as you try to free Lottie but find yourself unable to untie the knot. You look back at Misty who grins over at you. “Oh.” Misty murmurs, walking over and untying Lottie in one quick movement. You watch the tie slide loosely down Lottie’s arms, still not entirely sure how Misty untied it in the first place. Nat walks over to stand behind you, shooing Misty away. Misty makes an offended noise as she starts protesting but you’ve decided to ignore it as you look down at Lottie.

“Were you in on it?” You ask in concern. Lottie shakes her head, shooting an annoyed glare at a still protesting Misty.

“Do you seriously need to ask that?” Lottie asks, rolling her eyes. “She showed up at my house and the next thing I know I’m tied up in her house.” You eye Misty wearily as Nat still fights off her attempts to talk to either of you.

“Let’s just go home,” Lottie says, slightly pleading as she rubs at her wrists. She doesn’t seem all that worse for wear, more annoyed than anything at the ordeal.

“Shouldn’t we like… Call the cops or something?” You ask unsurely. Lottie raises an eyebrow in question as she looks at you.

“And tell them what? She fed me three meals a day and hasn’t left a mark on me. As far as the cops are concerned we could have been having a sleepover.” Lottie remarks, glancing back over at Misty.

Nat’s looking back and forth between Lottie and Misty with a look of disbelief on her face. “Are we seriously jus-” She starts.

“Yes,” Lottie says, setting her mug on the table and standing up. Misty sitting down on the couch opposite you after she gave up on trying to get past Nat. She looks frustrated as she looks between the three of you as if she doesn’t understand why you could possibly be upset with her.

“I was helping you!” Misty defends. “I brought you back together!” Misty pouts slightly as she looks at you.

You open your mouth to speak, unsure of what you could even say at this moment but Nat beats you to it.

“Thanks, Misty,” Nat says sarcastically, giving her a little wave. The two of you follow Lottie out the door, relieved to finally get out of there.

“Are you like… good?” Nat asks Lottie in concern. “I could still go back in there.”

Lottie sighs as she slumps back against your car. “It was fine, I guess. As far as kidnappings go.” She pauses as if deep in thought. “She just kept playing movie musicals.” She shivers in horror, glancing up at Misty’s house in remembered terror. Nat pats her shoulder sympathetically, also shivering in horror at the thought. You watch the scene in silent disbelief, shaking your head as you unlock the doors to your car. 

“What took you guys so long, anyway?” Lottie asks curiously as she buckles her seatbelt. You meet Nat’s eyes in the rearview mirror, both of you looking guilty and slightly panicked. Lottie takes one look at the two of you and gasps in offense.

“You stopped to make out while I was missing?” She scoffs but looks slightly amused anyway as she shakes her head. 

The drive to Lottie’s house is mostly spent in silence as she stares contemplatively out the window. You and Nat keep exchanging teasing glances in the rearview mirror and you're almost positive she’s coming home with you later. You pull into Lottie’s driveway to let her out but suddenly remember that you’ve busted her door. “Uh, Lottie.” You start, pointing at the door. “We kind of br-”

“Don’t worry about it,” Lottie mutters, pinching at the bridge of her nose. She turns to look at you looking uncharacteristically small in your passenger seat. “Would you spend the night?” She asks quietly. Your face falls slightly at the question but you immediately acquiesce. You and Nat could always hang out another time, you suppose. 

Lottie grins as she opens the car door. “It’s a big house, don’t let me get in your way. Just wait till I’m asleep, yeah? The least you could do for busting my door.” Nat scoffs and immediately starts arguing the necessity of it as you walk up the steps to her front door. 

You’ve missed this. 

…

December 25th, 1996. 

“It’s finally snowing.” You murmur as you turn your head to stare out the window.

“Yeah?” Nat asks quietly against your neck, the feeling of her hot breath making you shiver. She shifts against you to prop herself up on her elbow as she peers out the window over your body. “About time.” She says.

She looks you up and down with a smug grin making you roll your eyes. “Again?” You ask fondly.

She shrugs, incorrigible as always. “It’s been a while.” Nat teases. “Won’t you warm me up?”

“You’d be warmer if you put your clothes back on.” You point out playfully but lean in to kiss her anyway.

THIS WAS AMAZING GOOD LORD??

Heart Stealer – Shauna Shipman

Pairing: shauna shipman x fem!reader

Summary: In which Shauna Shipman steals not only your favorite pen during class, but your heart too.

Word count: 3,4k.

Content: no crash!AU, cursing, suggestive, fluff, mutual pining, making out, weird teenagers who don’t know how to communicate, everyone hating on jeff (as they should).

A/N: This is basically 3,4k words of reader simping over Shauna.

English is not my first language.

You're not sure when exactly you started noticing her, like really noticing her, but now you can't stop. It's like there's a part of your brain dedicated to cataloging every little detail about Shauna Shipman that you can find.

Maybe it was that time in english class when she turned to the side and shyly asked you to borrow a pen without looking in your eyes. Until then, you had never paid enough attention to your surroundings to know that she always sat next to you.

Anyway, you give her your favorite blue pen without giving it much thought, but when class is over Shauna just puts her own things away and leaves without giving you a second glance.

A week passes and it's as if she hasn't spoken to you; Shauna doesn't give your pen back, which is a bit rude, but you buy a new one – it's not the same, that pen was really good – and start paying a little more attention to her after that.

‘Cause damn, she's a really pretty pen thief.

You don't quite understand why she keeps it, she doesn't use it; That's one of the first things you notice, that she doesn't write with blue ink, just basic black.

Whatever, you won't bother her for that, admiring the way her hair falls over her shoulders during class is much more worth it.

That's probably when it was then, because after that you start to notice her everywhere you didn't before, red flannels catching your eye in the hallways. You find yourself learning things without even realizing it, recording everything you come to adore about Shauna Shipman; the way she wrinkles her nose when she doesn't understand a question on the test, how she always keeps her voice low when talking to people or how she's the first to raise her hand to answer what the english teacher asks in class just because she wants to show that she knows.

You swear you're not a stalker at all. The fact that she probably doesn't even know about your existence isn’t relevant. Are you a little obsessed, though? Yes, definitely.

It was just a silly crush then, that is, until your cousin Jeff started dating the captain of the football team, Jackie Taylor.

Jackie is good, great in fact; too good for Jeff who could be extremely clueless most of the time, but that doesn't matter, they are together and everyone at school knows that wherever Jackie Taylor goes Shauna Shipman is right behind, you can't have one without the other. So you start hanging out with both of them by extension, because as much as an idiot Jeff is, he manages to be a pretty bearable cousin – most of the time –, as well as being your ride home.

The four of you end up forming a little group with a really weird dynamic that works to a certain extent; with Jackie-Shauna being Jackie-Shauna, you and Jeff annoying each other every chance you get, Jeff and Shauna ignoring each other's existence, Jackie being really sweet to you – not really a change since she's your lab partner since the beginning of the year – and you and Shauna hardly ever speaking, but still side by side so you don’t third wheel whenever Jeff and Jackie go out.

That last part doesn't work well as much as the rest, not for you, at least.

You all end up hanging out a lot, which means Shauna is now everywhere, not just in the hallways or the class you share, she's really everywhere and boy, you are fucked.

You go with Jeff to the football games so he can cheer on Jackie – it sucks having to rely on the ride – and Shauna, of course, is there. She's the fastest of the Yellowjackets, you can tell, because your eyes can't stop searching the field for a second when you're in the stands. She is the fastest and is not afraid to face when someone from the other team says or does something stupid during the game, her face red and sweaty from the activity.

One day Shauna curses the game referee who dares to give her a red card for punching – and breaking – the nose of a girl who made fun of Jackie for committing a foul during the second half. She manages to do this without screaming at any point, which ends up being the thing that surprises you the most.

She doesn't look guilty at all as she puffs out her chest and lifts her chin at the girl with the bloody nose and makes her way back to the locker room; all you can do is stare at the whole thing with your jaw dropped because no one should have the ability to look that good after beating someone like that.

Shauna must feel your stupefied gaze on her, because when she turns around, her brow is furrowed and her big brown eyes stare at you with a mix of irritation and confusion: “And what are you looking at?” she asks.

You immediately steps back, because Shauna Shipman may be hot, but she's also scary as fuck. “N-nothing!”

If she didn't think you were weird before, she certainly does now.

You were right about that, now Shauna is the one staring at you. She stares a lot, all the time. You think she doesn't care that you know that, but she looks away whenever you look back at her anyway. It's strange and makes you nervous in a somewhat humiliating way, because she remains quiet and with a serious expression staring into your head even when you're just at school simply talking to some friends she doesn't know.

What ends up being embarrassing is how you're learning that you like her being so shameless like this. It's one more thing to learn about her. Your brain simply registers automatically: ‘Things to adore about Shauna Shipman’; She’s not shy about tackling whatever interests her – and look, it’s you! –, until they face her back, then she becomes shy as if she was actually being subtle; she’s good at fighting but avoids confrontation; she has an opinion on absolutely everything but generally lets people decide for her. You want to know more, more and more.

You work part-time at a pet store after school and Jeff usually leaves you there when he’s not busy, accustomed to your commute. On the days he can't, however, he tells you and you go walking, it's not that far.

Now, one day he just doesn't tell you that he won't be able to take you and you're left waiting for him like a fool on the curb in the school parking lot, damn it, Jeff.

Until Shauna's voice takes you out of your inner despair.

"Do you want a ride?"

When you lift your head there she is, her arm resting on the open car window, a dark red flannel folded up to her elbow and oh my god.

Oh, I want more than a ride, you think.

“Yeah,” you say and give her a small smile as you approach the car, “That would be good.”

She nods in acknowledgment without meeting your eyes as she reaches over to open the passenger door for you. That's another thing you noticed: Shauna doesn't tend to keep much eye contact and in your case she seems to avoid it completely.

You don't bother trying to fill the silence, there's not much to talk about when Jackie isn't around, Shauna doesn't seem to like it when you talk to her, so you don't expect this time to be any different.

But it is.

“Want to pick a song?”

“Huh?” You blink.

“A song,” She repeats, pointing with her chin to the glove compartment without taking her eyes off the road for even a minute – Shauna has always been a responsible driver.

Occurs to you why it's different this time. It's not the first time Jeff has left you in the parking lot, that idiot, but it's the first time Shauna has come to your rescue, even though she's seen you in this situation before. Now she's giving you a ride and trying to talk to you.

Which means, holy shit, Shauna Shipman is talking to you because she wants to.

"Ofcourse!” You rush to open the glove compartment to check the small selection of CDs in there, not giving much thought when Shauna takes the exact route to your job without even asking.

You choose one and put it on the radio, leaning back in your seat waiting for the first song starts, then Shauna straightens up in her seat and says to you smugly:

“Oh, you probably don’t know this band, they’re very underground, but I really like it.” She nods with a smile.

An amused snort escapes your chest, “Is Queen underground for you?”, you tease with a raised eyebrow.

Shauna lets out an outraged squeal and tightens her grip on the steering wheel: “They were!” she insists, “At least until they became trendy.”

"Right." You laugh because you're not going to upset her when she has the most adorable pout on her face.

You spend the short trip listening to the most unknown Queen songs that Shauna's CD brings together – these are the good ones! – and for what seems like the first time, you and her actually talk and the happiness you feel is greater than you could have imagined. When the road comes to an end, Shauna seems extremely disappointed at having to leave you and you try not to think too much about what that means.

This small event seems to turn a key in your relationship and you and Shauna seem to get closer all of a sudden, not that you're complaining.

She takes on the responsibility of being your personal chauffeur after school, taking you from one place to another with no hesitation as if it had always been that way.

“What if that asshole forgets you again?” She asks with those sad eyes staring at you – that's another change, now she looks you in the eye! Which ends up not being so good when it comes to denying her things.

“Shauna, that asshole is my cousin.” You scold weakly.

"So?"

Well, you can't question that.

You show up to her training when you don't have to work and you don't miss the way she seems to brag about it to her teammates, which only makes you show up more and more, even though you know nothing about football; you study together in the library, even if you only share one class; you, her and Jackie walk together between classes in the hallways and even stand side by side waiting to leave when Jackie disappears with Jeff at some stupid party.

You learn new things about Shauna every day and reading her is better than any other book you've ever tried. At some point, in your head, 'Things to Adore About Shauna Shipman' becomes 'Things to Love About Shauna Shipman' and it feels right.

She likes practically any food that contains meat and puts barbecue sauce on absolutely everything, leaving you horrified when she does this to a steak that is bleeding from being so rare when you have lunch together; She likes the warm, expensive beer that Lottie Matthews serves at her parties, she doesn't like getting drunk, she likes the taste, Shauna is weird like that and you're even weirder for finding it endearing. Sometimes, when you're outside smoking with Natalie and her sad emo friend, Kevyn Tan, Shauna comes over with a cup of beer in her hand – just one, she insists, because she's going to drive later – and sits down next to you quietly with one hand casually placed on your thigh while enjoying the drink; she lets Jackie dress her for these same parties, but she always chooses a piece of clothing that stands out, usually one of her flannels, she seems to have thousands of them; Shauna likes to read, but she loves classics, 'real books' as she calls them, with long words and old vocabulary, the second you pay attention she talks about them for hours and hours. You learn to like it too and Shauna seems to completely melt when you're the one who makes a Virginia Woolf or Emily Brontë reference when you talk.

One day, the team practice happens earlier and Shauna apologizes profusely for not being able to leave you at work, you dismiss her worries with a quick hug before leaving – not noticing the way she freezes in her place – and Jeff quickly agrees to take you there, he won't admit he missed you, but you know he did.

Later, the bell on the store's door signals someone's entry and when you turn from your spot at the counter, Shauna is there.

You tend to serve some Yellowjackets quite often, mainly Misty Quigley buying cat food; sometimes Van and Tai buying food for the abandoned dogs near the trailer park, Mari buying a hamster every two weeks – you have no idea what she does to make them all die or run away so quickly –, Nat showing up simply to hangout and smoke from time to time. You get along relatively well with all of them, but Shauna had never appeared until now.

She's still in her blue and yellow uniform, hair pulled into a ponytail and face softly red. The sight makes your throat dry.

Shauna looks a little like a lost puppy when she comes up to you at the counter.

“Hey,” she mumbles.

“Hey,” you reply, a smile playing on your lips. And then, just because you can't resist: “Did you run here after practice just to see me?”

Shauna seems like a deer caught in the headlights, “No!” She denies it, as if she hadn't been caught doing just that, "I just realized I leave you here all the time and I've never been in the store before."

You don't say anything and she simply shrugs innocently before starting to circle the place and you watch her with an amused snort.

She's not a pet person, you might say, but she apparently finds a fascination in staring at the colorful fishes in the aquariums when you come from behind the counter to restock and organize missing items on nearby shelves.

It's a small store and it's a pretty slow day with just you and another employee working in the back, so you and Shauna get into a relaxed mood spending time together when she decides she's going to stay until your shift ends without saying anything.

The company is good. At some point you jokingly say that since Shauna is here she could help you move the food packets because they are too heavy for you and she just goes there and does it. The way she lifts a bunch at once makes your breath hitch and you want to run your hands over her flexed biceps and you notice how Shauna hides a smile, as if she knows.

After that it's like there's a very thin line waiting to be crossed between you. Maybe it's always been there and you never noticed.

There are things about Shauna, things you like to think she says or does only to you, that your brain catalogs more than others, especially in moments when you're alone, like now.

Things to love about Shauna Shipman, you think; the way she subtly gasps when you need to rest your hand on her waist to pass through the store's narrow aisles; the fake annoyed look she gives you when you say something so stupid you just know she's pretending not to like it; the way she ends up snoring with laughter and scaring a customer you were serving after something you said and then she refuses to talk to you for the next fifteen minutes – the long that she can – giving you a dirty look because It's your fault, dammit.

But Shauna doesn't leave, no matter how angry she claims to be with you.

Things to love about Shauna Shipman, you think again, when your shift is over and she simply grabs your hand and leads you to her car, stating, "Let's go get ice cream."

She hates her middle name as much as she hates cute nicknames – you think it's just because she doesn't have one – and she won't tell you what it is because she doesn't want you to use it on her one day; her favorite color is blue, dark blue, but she usually wears shades of red because she says the football uniform is enough; she marks her books with lots of post-it notes of different colors, to remember her favorite chapters, phrases and quotes and revisits them almost daily; she keeps a hand on you whenever you're near, on your shoulder, your hip, your thigh. One day you left her reach when she had an arm around you at a party to get more drinks and when you came back she asked what she had done wrong, looking at you with those sad brown eyes.

Shauna takes you out for ice cream even though it’s already dark, an anxious air hovering between you. She grabs your favorite flavor without you having to tell her which one it is and you sit on the hood of her car, shoulders brushing together.

“You…” Shauna starts hesitantly, eating the bitterest chocolate ice cream she could find, “Do you wanna come to my house?”

You've been to Shauna's house before, but only with Jackie and Jeff. Never alone. Is different. You both know it's different.

"Yes." You say, hoping you don’t sound as desperate as you are, “I’d really like that.”

The smile she gives you makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

You only have time to unbuckle your seatbelt when Shauna parks in front of the house before she's on top of you watching you with dark eyes.

“Are you just going to stand there and watch me?” You scoff with more confidence than you actually have, your hands finding her waist.

Shauna looks completely outraged and in a second her lips meet yours without permission just because she knows she doesn't have to ask.

Her mouth is still cold and slick against yours from the ice cream, but her entire body is hot as dough ready to be molded in your hands. She wraps her arms around your neck, hands pulling your hair tightly and you feel her smile against your lips when she hears your low moan.

“Is that enough action for you?” Shauna asks mockingly, breathing fast, her practice uniform clinging to her body.

“Hm-hm,” you deny, a drunken, passionate smile painting your face, “Not as much as I’d like.”

Shauna looks like she wants to reply to what you've said, but then you're leaning in again, lips meeting hers with more urgency, tongue pleading for passage at the seam of her mouth, and it's all heat and electricity as she pulls you against her body. Your hands separate her t-shirt from the uniform shorts quickly and slide underneath it, short nails scraping the happy trail softly across her toned stomach and Shauna whimpers.

You can't help but break the kiss, Shauna follows your lips with a needy expression.

"What?" She asks, frustration bordering on her voice.

You shake your head and bite your bottom lip, “It’s really good,” you say. Shauna arches an eyebrow. "It's perfect. Touching you– it’s perfect.”

The way her hips thrust into yours and her face turned completely red tells you that she liked what you said a little too much.

And then Shauna is opening the car door, hurriedly sliding out and pulling you with her, mumbling an anxious “let’s go” as you stumble your way into the house.

You laugh when she fumbles with the key in the lock and she gives you an annoyed look, cutting off your laughter when the door opens and she presses you against it, pupils completely dilated, hands shaking to touch you.

It occurs to you then that maybe Shauna was just as obsessed with you as you were with her.

She looks at you, big brown eyes needy and asking and you don't hesitate to kiss her again and it's all heat and skin and it's right.

Another thing to love about Shauna Shipman: the way she gasps in surprise and pleasure when you turn her around and press her against the door.

The Half of It (2020) dir.: Alice Wu

movies + friendship

i love my mother v much

Reblog or your mom will die in 928 seconds.

I love my mom.

I am risking nothing

I AM SORRY FOLLOWERS, I LOVE MY MOMMY

Will not risk.

sorry followers :(

i’m so inlove with bella ramsey

i’m unapologetically a mike defender

THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT IM SAYING

please tell me you find bianca barclay attractive. at least just a little. please dont tell me its just me with this weird attraction.

bestie I'm not even joking when I say this- bianca barclay could choke me, step on me, rip my throat with a dagger and I'd still think about how she pushed me against the wall while doing it and how close we were and how we could've kissed with that tiny amount of distance between us

you see that smirk? I'll kill and die for that.

pope best obx character real

wardrobe appreciation ♡ pope heyward (outer banks s2)

"not all men" you're right, lucas sinclair would never treat me like this.

The fact the lumax (or mucas) only got one kiss throughout the entire 3 seasons they’ve been together pisses me off sm like mileven got 3 kisses (I think) + a makeout scene is so annoying smh

Will Byers x female reader

That's it. That's the joke.

No bcs let’s talk about it.

Caleb McLaughlin once again having to address how poorly he’s treated in comparison with his white co-stars by the fan base is once again a reminder of how fucking ugly this fandom can be. The fact that Lucas is a main party member and has been since day one, has been shown having important arcs, important relationships, and has been extremely vital to the plot in every single season and yet receives far less fan attention than his white counterparts is still the reality four seasons in and there’s a reason for that.

It’s the same reason Erica gets ignored and abused by the fandom. The same reason Argyle has received 1/100th of the attention Eddie has and the reason Steddie is far more popular than Jargyle despite Jonathan and Argyle actually having a relationship (and I like Eddie and Steddie so don’t come at me I’m just saying). The same reason Billy still has an extremely devoted fan base who call him a sweet baby boi and write endless fics about him despite him canonically being a racist asshole who literally threatened Lucas’s life just because he was black. It’s the reason Caleb gets snubbed for awards despite some extremely phenomenal acting, especially in the S4 finale. (hint: it’s racism).

Anyway, Lucas and Caleb are amazing and deserve everything and I just think the ST fandom as a whole needs to be cognizant of how the (very few!) POC in the cast are treated.