The Grief Manual:

the grief manual:

- louis l'amour: "all loose things seem to drift down to the sea, and so did i." i think that one day i will write that in the sand and watch the water wash it away and maybe that's the secret magic spell

- buffy's the body. anya's speech, "i was having fruit punch and i thought: joyce will never have any more fruit punch, ever. and she'll never have eggs, or yawn, or brush her hair, not ever - and no one will explain to me why." tara's comment that it's always sudden, even if you know it's coming. buffy's comment that she's never done this before - this grieving a parent

- gandalf, or olorin, who was a disciple of nienna, a valar whose power was to weep forever. her power is to turn grief into wisdom

- mary oliver

- cristina yang and her introduction to the dead dad's club. "i don't know how to exist in the world where my dad doesn't. " "yeah, that never really changes."

- kurt vonnegut

The problem with being chronically ill is that when you become more sick, with more symptoms, people do not understand why its so upsetting.

"But weren't you in pain before?". Yes but this is a new pain that I haven't dealt with before.

"I thought you already had stomach problems?". Yes but this is a new symptom of it that scares me.

"Arent you used to this by now?". No, and I never will be.

Symptoms that have been had for months or years are hard enough to manage in the first place. Developing a new one is scary, and trying to find ways to cope while still juggling everything else is even more so. We are allowed to be upset at our symptoms progressing. It doesn't mean it wasn't bad before. It just means now its bad in another way we arent familiar with. And that sucks.

Boom! You’re passé What can you do?

Rainer Maria Rilke, The Dark Interval: Letters on Loss, Grief, and Transformation

I was having writers block and so I took a break and soon enough it was 3 in the morning and I had impulsively sewn together a tiny mouse you’re welcome