Lemony Snicket - Tumblr Posts
The tears I shed for you could fill a thousand oceans. But they could not extinguish your house.
Lemony Snicket? Can’t remember, honestly
THIS IS SO FUCKING REAL
credit to TurboBurpo on twitter
we are never
getting back together
Jacques: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?
Beatrice: >:O language
Kit: Yeah watch your fucking language
Esmé: OKAY WHO TAUGHT KIT THE FUCK WORD?
Olaf: 'The fuck word'.
Lemony: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time
Kit: Oh my god they censored it
Olaf: Say fuck, Lemony.
Kit: Do it, Lemony. Say fuck.
not my usual content or anything but here's an asoue headcanon:
Lemony's middle is Dante. Let me explain.
So everyone knows that scene in Vile Village where they talk about Dante, right? Like the guy who wrote Dante's Inferno? My headcanon is that Dante is Lemony's middle name.
Along with this I raise these full names for the snickets:
Katherine "Kit" Sappho Snicket
Jacques Whitman Snicket
Lemony Dante Snicket
————————————————————————
My headcanon is that all three snickets' middle names are named after poets.
Kit's middle name is after Sappho, a well known poet from Archaic Greece, and probably the first well known female poet.
Jacques's middle name is after Walt Whitman. Walt is well known for his poems "Song of Myself" and "When Lilacs Last in the Dooryard Bloomed".
Lemony's middle name– you already know after Dante and Dante's Inferno.
I just feel like their middle names are after famous poets.
But you guys know the drill by now: that's just my two cents!
a series of unfortunate events is really the blueprint for characters doomed by the narrative like i think that series changed my brain chemistry forever… the title tells you how the story will end and the author repeatedly tries to warn you away but still you pick up the book. the first sentence is that it’s a tragedy and you keep reading anyway.. you read through the whole story and it’s terrible and tragic and unfortunate and then after you’ve stayed up late reading it under your covers with a flashlight, you go to your school library as soon as class is over and check out the next book in the series because you need to know what happens even though really, you already know. the end is right there in the title, it’s there in every page .. before the story even begins you know it’s a tragedy and you read it anyway and—
Who’s gonna match my freak (reviving the asoue fandom)
The one detail in Penultimate Peril that I will never, ever get over is that Lemony Snicket smokes. He shows up and offers to take away the Baudelaires, and he's smoking a cigarette.
All through the series, fire is the ultimate Bad Thing. The good guys are firefighters and the bad guys are firestarters. Arson is the worst crime. And the Baudelaires' descent into moral ambiguity is shown through them starting multiple fires.
Lemony Snicket might as well be the poster boy for VFD. He was raised in it since infancy. He lost Beatrice because of the consequences of being a volunteer. He has been on the lam for at least fifteen years because of his dedication to it. He lost both of his siblings to it. There are plenty of people in the series who question VFD and its motives, but for all it's done to hurt him, Snicket is very loyal. He does point out some flaws, but not as many as you'd expect.
And yet Lemony smokes. Lemony starts fires every day to feed his own addiction. He carries a lighter or matches with him at all times, just like the villains do. He regularly engages in a massive fire hazard. He says himself that a man who smokes cigarettes is somewhere in between wicked and noble. I want to know how someone so deep in VFD even started smoking.
I think the one thing I am the saltiest about Netflix not including is that. Truly Lemony being a smoker is everything to me.
i'm a sucker for narrators who are like,,, part of the narrative. they're a part of the story. they may or may not be fundemantal to it, but they influence it one way or another.
I need the Letters to Beatrice imprinted into my brain.
actually shes cheating on you I'm her REAL wife
Ladies and gents, my wife Esme Squalor.
the next time I see someone say that count olaf is hot im gonna lock them up in a prison cell and feed them lettuce like a turtle
I just now realized that the Virginian Wolf Snake in The Reptile Room was named after Virginia Woolf. I have no idea how I'm just realizing that.
me trying my fav book's art style:
The Big Three (in my opinion)
Rod Sterling (The Twilight Zone)
Lemony Snicket (ASOUE)
Pilomena Cunk (Cunk On Earth)