Joel's Gone Soft On Him.

Joel's gone soft on him.

It's true– Really, it is, Jimmy thinks, eyebrows furrowed in thought. Joel's gone soft.

Don't get him wrong, it's not a bad thing. 'Cuz Jimmy isn't like that and softness doesn't mean weak... It's just that he's not used to it.

Like. At all.

He's not used to this side of Joel, the one that sleeps with Jimmy keeping watch, snoring and curled up on his side. Joel's a light sleeper, and it kinda shows. His face scrunches up when Jimmy stops playing with his hair, idly combing through them for no other reason than because he can.

They're still touchy, always have been, and Joel's never been one to shy from playing rough. He's the same, same old Joel, except sometimes he isn't. Sometimes he's more.

Joel shifts in his sleep, mumbling something under his breath. Jimmy's hand stills, fingers between soft strands.

For a second, he thinks that maybe Joel wants him to stop. But then Joel's making that face again, the pinched expression with the small frown that Jimmy's come to know as why’d you stop? And Jimmy obliges, keeps his hand moving and drags his fingertips gently on Joel's scalp, keeps at it until his features smooth out and Joel's snoring again.

It makes Jimmy's heart squeeze, just a little. He's never seen him so– vulnerable.

Idly, he wonders if Etho's ever done this.

Joel doesn't talk about Etho a lot.

Jimmy makes a face. Okay, no, that's not true. He does. He talks about him, but it's in that like, angry sort of way where his voice pitches up and his hands get all jittery. He scowls a lot when he does, Jimmy noticed, and after a while it gets obvious that it's not exactly the best subject.

He replaced me with a cow, Jim! Joel lamented. A bloody cow!

Surely I was worth more to him than that!

And Jimmy wasn't sure if he was, like, genuinely upset for a second. Honest. But he looked and Joel's hands were shaking a little, and his glare on the horizon looked a hair away from hurt. So Jimmy wasn't thinking when he patted him on the back, saying, with as much sincerity as he could muster, You're way cooler than a cow.

(It's a miracle he didn't start laughing on the spot.)

He kept going, If it makes you feel any better, you're worth at least three.

That startled a laugh out of Joel, Think you mean a hundred, mate.

Jimmy laughed, his shoulders relaxing at Joel's grin.

Yeah, 'course.

–The point is, Jimmy wonders.

Wonders if Joel's ever had this, someone watching over him while he rests. Wonders if he's ever had his hand held just for the sake of it, wonders if anyone's ever wanted to keep him warm.

Jimmy wonders if he's the first.

Joel shivers, snapping him out of his thoughts. With careful hands, Jimmy takes the end of the blanket out from under Joel's arm, pulling it over his shoulder. In his sleep, Joel makes a soft, insistent noise.

Jimmy smiles, just a little. Gosh, he really likes his hair played with, huh?

(He'd tease him for it, but he knows better.)

Jimmy combs Joel's hair back, pushing it away from his eyes. Joel relaxes under his touch yet again.

Yeah, Jimmy thinks. Yeah.

Joel could use a bit of softness. Just a bit.

(And Jimmy's more than happy to provide.)