You Are A 512 Year Immortal In A Bar, Angry Because You Cant Order A Beer. Its Not Your Fault You Took

You are a 512 year immortal in a bar, angry because you can’t order a beer. It’s not your fault you took the immortality potion at 12 and have looked the same ever since!

I’m going to be honest, this is why I haven’t finished draft 1 of my novel yet…

The fuck when you started with a 2,000 word one-shot thrown together and published at 2 am. And now you're staring down the barrel of a 10,000 word chapter of a multi-chapter fic with three spin-off fics, a crossover and a prequel in the works 💀 💀 💀

This hurts, I miss him so much. I tried to make a tribute, but I couldn’t finish it in time. Technoblade meant so much to me growing up, and his videos helped me through some dark times in my life. And now that I’m here, about to go to college, I can’t help but look back at all the times he’s made me a better person.

It’s still hard to get my head around the fact he’s never going to make another video again, or make a bunch of kids run away in fear, or just make a few random guys like me feel a little bit better.

Technoblade Never Dies! O7

Thank you for such kind words. I saw the “ask” you sent me, and that was the highlight of my day. All I want with my stories is to have other people enjoy them as much as I do. I’m glad you’re interested in my world, I hope it lives up to your expectations when I finally finish it.

Follower special! All followers, this is for you!

Wow, I have been here for a month and already 15 followers, you pioneers of kindness. Thank you for reading, and now I have something for each of you. I don't have much, money, technical know how, or talent. But I can write, so here I decided to give each of you a personal prompt based on what I know from your blogs. Here goes nothing!

@cheezbot, "Is...why...how?" (Cheese vending machine) "Welcome to your dreams user...I got munster, Brie, Jack, etc."

@mike-like-t-scream, "Who is that lurking behind you?" "Don't worry about him, he just my pet...who is very protective,"

@snootlestheangel, "Are you from heaven?" "Used to be, got a bit borin' up there," "What happened to your wings then?" "Now that is a bit of a long story,"

@mysticalgalaxysalad, "Because of you the universe is now a salad," "How did I?" "Oh shut up, you know what you did,"

@somnifey, "I put a spell on you?" (Random hot guy looks up) "Yes you!"

@devotedshadowytherapist, "I am completely normal," "Prove it!" "Uhhh, I am a 23 year-old man," "And?"

@queerlilchinchin, "I feel sick!" "You mean anxious?" "Both," "You are a trained warrior chinchilla, you can get through this!,"

@j-1173, "Who are you," "That is a very interesting question, allow me to me answer in very complicated terms,"

@maddielang16, "What are your talents?" "You mean what aren't they," "Uh..." "Here let me show you!"

@motheyesofnight, "What a beautiful sight," "Gives me ideas," "What kinda of idea," "Do you really want to know?"

@Christine24256, "Nothing," "Excuse me?" "I said nothing," "Oh okay,"

@ravenmichaelisstuff, "What did you do this time?!," "It was only a small explosion this time," (Character A sighs,) "(Character B) Hey it saved your life! *Whispers* My your disappointment is hot," "What as that?" "Nothing!"

@cynicamo, "Meow," "Is that all you will say?" "Meow?" "Your a damn human being!"

@writingalterras, "Dang that was some solid advice," "Thanks, I try," "Care to explain that universe of yours again?" "Oh sure! ...*two hours later*...and that is about it!" (Listener with stars in their eyes) "Woah!"

@broitsf-ckingfreezing, "Master," "That's a new one," "I just assumed, since you know...uh," "Since I just sliced that guy in half?"

Author's note. I tried to make it as personal as I could for each, I was offensive in any way, I am sure I meant good will. You are all so special to me, thank you so much for reading my material, it means so much that you follow me...even by accident if you did. THANK YOU...that's all I can say but I say it as heart felt as I can...more coming in the future.

Some of these are pretty funny

responses to "I'm going to kill you" ?

"I don't believe you."

"If I'm going to die, I intend to deserve it."

"You'd be surprised how often people say that."

"Not if I kill you first."

"Fine, but I'm taking you with me."

"Thank God."

"I'm not afraid to die."

"What did I do this time?"

"You don't have better things you could be doing?"

"Finally."

"I don't think you have what it takes."

"Think before you speak."

"I didn't think it would end this way."

"Then, we have a problem."

"If you must."

"Oh, really?"

"That's fine, I guess."

*laughs*

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"Why?"

"You'll never get the chance."

"And what did I do to deserve death by your hand?"

"Are you sure about that?"

"I'm not ready to die."

"No thanks."

"And how do you plan on doing that?"

"Never make plans you don't intend to follow through with."

"You realize I'm going to defend myself, correct? And I won't go easy on you."

"Please don't."

"What makes you think you're capable of doing that?"

"Now, now, let's not make any rash decisions."

"Well, I could never say no to you."

"Why? I'm lovely."

"This is quite possibly the last thing I wanted to do today."

"Don't say things you don't mean."

"You would never hurt me."

Thanks! This is really helpful, I’ve been worrying about what I’m going to do for my cover. Do you have any good suggestions on how to actually get your book printed?

novlr.org

How to Source Publisher-Quality Book Cover Design as a Self-Published Author - Novlr

I spoke with art commissioners from Faber and Bloomsbury to get their top tips on how to source great art for your book cover design.

The post is full of great insights, but here are some of the top tips to give you a sneak peek:

Top tips to making sure you’ll get quality book cover design

To give you the best chance of finding quality illustrators and artists for your cover art, these are the top tips from the publishers I spoke with:

Find artists who have worked on commission before. Make sure they show evidence of problem-solving, and that their portfolio gives a clean and clear idea of their style.

When in discussion with an artist or illustrator, make sure you can describe what you’re looking for in 5-10 words. This gives your designer a clear idea of what you want for your book cover design and ensures they’ll be working to a clear brief. If you can describe your work succinctly, then they’ll be able to design a memorable cover that reflects exactly that, and nothing else.

Look for illustrators who suit your themes. You might really love an artist’s work, but if they specialise in subdued, soft lines and specialise in fantasy art, they’re probably not the right designer for your romance or horror cover.

Do not ask for custom samples without being willing to pay a fee. Never ask an artist to work for free. You can get a sense of their style from a portfolio, but if you want to see tailored work samples, you must be willing to pay them – you will attract better-quality designers.

Always work with a contract. This is essential for both parties to ensure you both know what is expected from the other. It alleviates the likelihood any nasty surprises and keeps both parties protected from things like intellectual property theft or copyright infringement. Besides, if an illustrator isn’t willing to work with a contract, that’s usually a red flag that they’re someone you don’t want to work with. It’s worth it for that reason alone.