just a reblog account for stuff i like.18+ only.
701 posts
Ueeewwwwww - Yippeesss - Tumblr Blog
L: Amane-san, what did you think the L stood for?
(someone requested I draw "canon!Misa and fem!L interacting" so behold my vision)
nephewdad uncleson. araki was too much of a pussy to expand on their father son relationship. SO I WILLLLLLLLLLLLL.
this is embarrassing but would anybody like to rp jjba.. literally anything involving it. i love characters from all nine parts so i’d be chill to do whatever ship or dynamic
i have a preference for genderswapping characters because i’m lesbian as fuck and GL/yuri is my jam but i like doing yaoi/BL too so if u want to do that that’s perfectly fine ^_^
(also if u don’t even wanna do a ship thats vibey too)
consider hmu bcuz i’m sooo bored and need new rp partners
Bucci gang headcanons
Bruno Bucciarati
-Wes Andersson fan (his comfort movie is Grandhotel Budapest)
-fave era is roaring 20s (aesthetic & music wise)
-listens to electro swing, swing, jazz and blues
-has a very strong sweet tooth. His cravings are so extreme he is able to eat whole giant chocolate on one go and not gain a single kilogram. His favorite ice cream is stracciatella and his go to dessert is tiramisu. If you wanna bribe him, use sweets
-loves Golden Girls (Sofia is his favorite character)
-hardcore Eurovision fan, always prepares for the Eurovision weeks in advance, it's like a holiday for him
-brings small camera with him everywhere he goes, gets very emotional and sentimental when taking pictures, loves to keep all the memories
-shares an old record player with Abbacchio, they collects vinyl records together
-in charge of shared Netflix and Disney+ account
-has an ornamental lower back tattoo which matches the one he has on his chest. Has a lot of tattoos all over his body in general
-is very good at sailing and has a captain's licence. As a kid he used to be obsessed with pirates, he still lowkey fantasizes about life at sea
-surprisingly a very good dancer and hella skilled belly dancer. He is also very flexible
-Caterina Caselli number 1 fan
-drinks a lot of coffee, never starts a day without a cup of cappuccino
-obsessed with candles
-as a kid he used to build wooden ship models with his dad. Now as an adult he still does it sometimes, when he is not too busy
-bought himself a sewing machine because he is really into fashion and wanted to start making his own clothes. Isn't very good at it tho, his sewing skills are poor, so he always ends up zipping everything up with his stand and then acts like that's how the "sewn" piece is supposed to look like
-has a sweet melodic laugh
-extremely flirty, he is a snarky little shit who loves to tease others
-"Oh my god look at the sky! The colors are so beautifl!" *takes a picture* "And the clouds? Wow!" *takes another picture* "Guys, come look at the sunset!" *takes 20 more pictures*
-has a very low alcohol tolerance (3 glasses in and he is under the table)
-although he seems like a very well put together person, he is very messy and tends to misplace things, especially when he creates extra storage with zippers he can't find anything. He calls it "organized chaos"
-can easily sneak up on others, he just silently spawns out of nowhere. Is it his natural ability or is Sticky Fingers involved? No one knows
-is able to talk his way out of anything, uses his charm to his advantage a lot. Also the master of puppy eyes
-suffers from PTSD because of the attack on his father, that's why he always sleeps with a knife under his pillow. Everytime he hears noises in the middle on the night he gets paranoid that someone is hiding in or sneaking into his home with the intention of harming him and his love ones. When the panic attacks hit him really hard, he irrationally makes extra safety precautions, such as blocking doors with furniture or leaving the lights on. Also has trouble sleeping in unknown places because he feels vulnerable and exposed to potential dangers, he is always in a state of high alert.
-his favorite season is winter, he enjoys Christmas the most because he loves giving presents and being with his family. He definitely plays an old Ella Fitgerald vinyl records during Christmas time
Leone Abbacchio
-tea lover, his favorite is earl grey
-doesn't like sweets, however he enjoys dried fruit (especially figs)
-Narancia is his favorite kid
-movies enthusiast, has seen sooo many movies and is the biggest critic. He has a Letterboxd account where he writes reviews. Loves watching old horror movies the most because of the gothic aesthetic, but DC movies have a very special place in his heart
-hardcore Depeche Mode, Calabrese and London After Midnight fan
-goes jogging every morning
-after getting sober he tries to look after his diet more, thanks to Bruno
-knows a lot about occult stuff
-secretly watches RuPaul's drag race with Trish
-owns a motorcycle
-named his stand after Bruno's favorite music genre to honor everything Bruno has done for him
-takes very cold and brisk showers
-taught all the boys how to drive
-thanks to Mista he became a huge Gorillaz fan
-since Moody Blues doesn't have lips, she communicates with him via symbols on her digital forehead screen
-never puts down his headphones
-has a playlist for literally any occasion. Tends to gatekeep music, you have to be very special if he shows you his playlists. Has made a playlist for each member of the Bucci gang, the only one who knows is Bruno (Leone created him multiple playlists, they even have a shared one, which they play when they are alone)
-his skin is very prone to bruising
-Moody Blues also allows him to see fragments of the past when he touches various items, he is able to sense the overall vibe and emotions of their owner and the situation they were in while using the item.
-his clothes may be dark, but I know for a fact his socks and underwear are colorful af, wild patterns all over
-his favorite season is autumn, he loves rainy and foggy weather
-the biggest prankster of the group. Everyone thinks either Narancia or Mista are always responsible for the pranks, but it is actually Leone. No one ever suspects him, because he doesn't look like the type of guy who would enjoy such childish things. And thanks to his stoic appearance he always gets away with it.
-true crime podcast listener. Him and Fugo share this passion and often discuss their favorite podcast shows. Sometimes they watch detective movies together and bet on who will solve the mystery first
Pannacotta Fugo
-reads a lot of crime novels in his free time, always comes up with his own theories and tries to solve the case before the detective (got mistaken only once and couldn't get over it for a long time). His favorite author is Sebastian Fitzek
-loves watching cartoons and animated movies, because he didn't get to enjoy them as a child
-hates horror movies because of loud jumpscares, but doesn't mind gore
-drinking green tea helps him to calm down
-gets sunburnt easily
-either never gets ill, or is sick for several weeks straight
-developed not only respiratory, but also digestive problems because of Purpe Haze and feels nauseous a lot (also throws up very often)
-uses make up to cover his facial scars
-his skin is extremely dry
-has a very light sleep, he finds it extremely difficult to share room with others during missions (he is only able to fall asleep with either Bruno or Giorno because they are not noisy sleepers like the others)
-Sheila, Murolo and him have regular sleepovers and movie marathons. They also cook dinner together
-his favorite bands are System of a Down, Slipknot, Bad Omens and Motionless in White
-can't go on rides in amusement parks because he gets sick
-him and Abbacchio visit rage rooms regularly
-always carries a book with him
-chews a lot of bubblegum to release his anger
-everytime the gang travels abroad he is the one who has to translate everything since he knows many foreign languages. He speaks english, french, russian, spanish and norwegian fluently, his pronunciation is so spot on you could barely tell he is not a native speaker. Doesn't have an accent at all. Also knows basics of sign language and cyrillic alphabet. He uses these skills often in Italy too, when he gets approached by strangers on the streets he pretends he is a confused tourist who doesn't undertand italian
-gets overstimulated easily, he is especially sensitive to noises (suffers from misophonia)
-bites ice cream and ice
-"the book was better than the movie" type of person
-picky eater, very cautious with unfamiliar food
-takes extremely hot showers. Whenever he is in the bathroom it ends up looking like a sauna in there. Also the gang has an unwritten rule that if they share a room during a mission, Fugo can use the bathroom first because he hates feeling dirty and has to use the shower immediately, otherwise he will be grumpy and won't shut up about it
-has a nasty skin picking habit, which results in him picking patches of dry skin and scabbed-over cuts and scratches (many of his injuries never fully heal because of this)
-never leaves the house without a hand sanitizer
-fidgets with his hands a lot when he is anxious
-goes to bed first and also wakes up the first
Narancia Ghirga
-vegetarian
-convinced Abbacchio to watch Brooklyn 99 with him (although Leone didn't like it at first, they now binge watch it together). They also watched Breaking Bad and What We Do In The Shadows
-has heterochromia
-thinks Orange Capri Sun is the supreme flavor and refuses to drink any other flavor
-created a shared playlist for the squad, he blasts it everytime the gang travels somewhere (it mostly consist of EDM, trap, phonk and rap)
-always beats everyone in Just Dance game sessions
-wears mismatched socks
-somewhat good at drawing, has a very unique cartoon caricature-like style
-hardcore Marvel fan (loves Guardians of the Galaxy the most), argues with Abbacchio a lot because he likes DC
-Mista, Trish and him had a podcast at some point
-his favorite candy is Kinder Surprise
-makes paper airplanes when bored
-bites people he love
-cries when animal dies in a movie
-suffers from seasonal allergy
-sleeps with tiny Creeper and Enderman Minecraft plushies, he takes them everywhere and even made them an instagram account, where he shares random pictures of them. When someone from the gang goes on a separate mission, he gives one plushie to the group or the individual, so they wouldn't feel lonely. And they also take pictures of the plusie and send them to Narancia.
-speaking of Minecraft, he manages a server where the gang plays together. He even created custom skins for everyone which look like their stands. Since he is the only one without humanoid stand, his skin is Mr. Smith, the pilot or Aerosmith. He wears a jacket with a picture of his stand in the back
-he is afraid of doctors and doesn't like hospitals. Everytime he gets sick or injured, he gets very anxious about his health. He hates dentists the most.
-loves when Fugo reads to him because he has a very smooth audio-book-like voice when he is calm
-experimented with different hair dyes couple of times, Trish and Abbacchio helped him
-die hard South Park fan, quotes the show on daily basis
-steals everyone's clothes. Can't find a shirt? Narancia is wearing it. Your hoodie is missing? It's in Narancia's closet
-has sticky notes all over his room, because if he doesn't have something written down, he will most likely forget it
-surprisingly very strong, the only person from the gang he is not able to lift up is Leone
Giorno Giovanna
-his emotions effect his powers (different flowers grow around him or from his hair when he gets excited, angry or scared), however he manages to control and hide it well
-master builder in The Sims game; doesn't care about the gameplay as such, he just enjoys building the houses and spends hours decorating them. Fugo loves to join his gaming sessions, but he on the other hand doesn't care about the houses or decorations, his goal is to always kill as many sims as possible (he loves to play around with various gruesome mods, which Giorno secretly enjoys watching)
-walking cottage core moodboard aesthetic
-goes on a picnic at least 2 times a week. In general preferst to eat ouside, terrace or garden are his favorite places
-has a very complex skincare routine
-heist movies enthusiast
-Trish got him into astrology and tarot cards
-loves theatre and poetry, even tried to write some poems himself
-writes official Passione documents on typewriter
-installed beehives in the Passione mansion gardens and makes his own honey
-collects dried flowers
-is the best liar in the group
-a bug magnet, there is always some type of insect crawling on his clothes
-him and Fugo have library & bookshop dates, they also visit museums together and exchange random facts about nature. Nerds in love, what can I say
-caramel is his favorite ice cream and dessert toping
-has a small floral tattoo on his wrist
-autistic
-loves taking bubble baths
-takes part in any bet without hesitation, no matter how absurd it is
-very bad dancer, has no rythm, but he is the best singer from the group, his voice is angelic
-very rough driver; hits the breaks hard, pumps up the gas fast and does very sharp turns. Also drives hella fast
-learned how to differentiate the steps of other people (especially the fellow teammates, since they live together). This is an old habit from his childhood.
-he walks very quietly, others barely notice when he walks into a room or when he leaves
-hates the smell of cigarettes
-others think he has a very odd music taste, because he will be singing a song from a Disney movie and within a couple of minutes you can catch him vibing to Banshee. He is forbidden to play his music in the car because it consist of all kinds of genres it makes it almost uncomfortable to listen to. His fellow gang members say his playlists are inconsistent, but they just make sense to Giorno.
-speaking of music, he is a huge fan of Hozier, Die Antwoord, Ghostemane and Little Big
-very creative, his hobbies include all kinds of crafty ativities, such as sewing, embroidering, pottery making, felting, knitting, soap making, candle making…. you name it, if he can create something, he will. And he is very good at it
-extremely fascinated by venomous animals and poisonous plants. The deadlier the better. His obsession with killer plants led to him nicknaming Fugo "his aconito", because he associates the aconite flower with his stand (it disables nerves, lowers blood pressure, and can stop the heart, plus it's purple). His other favorite flowers associated with Fugo and Purple Haze are Nightshade, Love in a mist, Spider lily and Morning glory
-zones out a lot
-sleeps with dozens of pillows, when he sleeps he is literally burried under them
-when he gets overwhelmed he lights up an incense stick and it calms him down. He is very fond of nice smells.
Guido Mista
-enjoys shitty movies, especially buddy commedies and low budget rom coms. Abbacchio hates when Mista picks films for the movie nights. Bruno on the other hand loves it
-Adam Sandler number 1 fan
-signed up for an archery course, also tried to use crossbow at some point
-can fall asleep anywhere, snores very loud
-likes the weirdest food combinations (like ice cream and pickles and stuff), the type of person who eats fries with McFlurry
-kills bugs with Nerf guns, Giorno hates it
-plays airsoft and paintball in free time
-enjoys camping, rockclimbing and rafting. Outdoor activities are his thing
-hella superstitious, made up various rituals he repeats in order to avoid bad luck
-very religious, always says a prayer before every mission
-reggaeton is his favorite type of music
-idk why but him having diabetes makes so much sence, since Pistols have to eat regularly to keep his energy and sugar lvl. stable
-mayo is his go to dressing with everything (fries, hot dog, nachos...)
-him and Narancia have 1am fast food trips
-makes silly bets with others and always challenges them to do something stupid for money, Giorno is always the first one to participate
-the best hugger
-big brother energy, everytime the other teammates screw something up and are afraid to tell Bucciarati or Abbacchio, they go to Mista for advice. He is extremely responsible and can always keep his head clear in stressful situations
-claims to hate drama but is always down to listen to some fresh tea
-loves watching cooking competitions. He is always judging the contestants harder than Gordon Ramsay ever could, Abbacchio occasionally joins him because he finds it amusing
-whenever someone tells him "I love you" he replies "Ditto", referencing one of his favorite movies (Ghost, 1990)
i think fugo and abbacchio go all out during christmas. Its like that one scene in the jim carrey grinch movie with like the light canons. They made that first
I love grindr images like this, they're so awesome sauced
😤🤝😳
In rth Another Day it says a lot of kids are actually scared of Okuyasu because of his rough looks and whatnot and that's so unfair he is PERFECT just the way he is 😤😤😤
(it ALSO says that there's a lot of rumours that go around and the worst ones are about his brother, which is still a sore subject, and the whole school finds out when Okuyasu flunked all his exams- school just doesnt seem to be great for him 🥺🥺 but he has Verified Angel Josuke at least ok I'm done talking)
ok ok but what if: dio as a merman
Dio and Jonathan as mermen
Dio is an eel thats a jealous prick towards his half brother and Jonathan is a big whale shark bc he wouldnt hurt a fly bc of how good of a gentleman he is
Passione Boys After You Dump Them | Headcanons
How they react and how they try to win you back. Because we love to see a man grovel.
tags: gn reader, slightly toxic in some of them, nsfw implications in abbacchio’s
Giorno Giovanna
Your announcement that you wanted to break up with him wasn’t exactly a surprise to the Don. He’s perceptive of your feelings, and he knows that he doesn’t have as much free time as most. He certainly isn’t able to be there for you as often as other suitors would. That doesn’t mean he’s happy to hear it, though.
This may be one of the few moments where you see his carefully crafted shell begin to crack. You mean more to Giorno than you know. He’s had so few people he loves in his life. The thought of losing you breaks his heart in a way he hasn’t experienced before.
Giorno isn’t willing to let this conversation end until you see things his way, and he is incredibly persuasive when he wants to be. Maybe you should wait and cool off a bit, amore. He can take care of all of this if you’ll just give him some time.
But…you don’t give in. He realizes, too late, that in all the time he’s spent away from you, these problems have become too much for you to bear any longer. You made up your mind and nothing he says is going to change it. Any further attempts to convince you are equally rebuffed, until he accepts that you’re just not willing to speak to him right now.
So he gives you space. No big deal. He’s patient. He can keep himself from pursuing you…for a while. The last thing Giorno wants to do is act impulsively on his emotions, and he’s certainly feeling more emotional than usual right now. He lets you have some distance, but ultimately he’s confident in his ability to win you back. No one else can take care of you like he can.
There may never be a moment in his mind where he truly feels as if he’s lost you. You’re not really broken up, you’re just taking a break. Yes, maybe you were right in saying that he hasn’t been setting aside enough time for you. And yes, he can understand why you might feel as if you only come second place to other priorities in his life. He’s a busy guy! But you have to understand that he’s doing his best, and he’ll find a way to do better. For your sake.
So he leaves you alone. Maybe you need a few weeks, or even a month or two. When he feels you’ve calmed down enough, he’ll start reappearing in your life again. As a friend, of course! He wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable, ha ha, but you two have always gotten along, even before you were together, so surely you won’t object to him just checking in? :)
And it’s like you’d forgotten how easy he is to talk to. How helpful his advice is. How nice it feels to bask in the glow of one his soft, genuine smiles, which so few others are lucky enough to see. And so, maybe you end up spending more time with him than you wanted to, in the wake of your breakup. He acts so nonchalant about all of it, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world to be spending time with you, no awkwardness, no lingering bitterness, that you can’t help but lean into it.
He knows exactly the right time to strike up a conversation about getting back together. When you’re alone together and the mood is high (and maybe you’re starting to realize that you really do miss him. Just a little bit), he’ll lay a hand on your arm and finally allow himself to be honest with you again.
“I’ve thought about what you said, and I want to apologize for the ways I’ve fallen short. But you must understand, amore, there’s no one for me but you. If you can find it in yourself to give me another chance, I promise I’ll prove that to you.”
Guido Mista
Totally blindsided. He doesn’t even know how to react at first. I mean, sure, you two had been having some issues, but it wasn’t anything that serious, right?? He’s already planned your whole lives together. He even picked out the name of your future cat. You can’t just leave him now!
Be prepared to have a very long, very emotional argument. Mista cannot accept you leaving him, and he can’t understand why you’re not willing to stay and work these problems out. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so distraught as he is now. He loves you so much, and he knows you love him too. Shouldn’t that be enough?
It isn’t, and you tell him that, and it absolutely crushes him. You’re both in tears by the time you leave, and even then he’s following you out the door trying to convince you to stay. He’ll be blowing up your phone afterwards, and then your email if you block him. There’s almost nothing too embarrassing for him at this point, he’d cashapp you money just to get you to read the note attached. This poor man lmao. He just really, really loves you, and he can’t not have you in his life.
He’s so mad at you. He can’t even remember the last time someone cut him this deep. The rest of the team is immediately made aware of how crushed he is, and Mista doesn’t even have to tell them. The cloud hanging over him is dark enough that passerby’s on the street can tell there’s something wrong with this man.
I can see him getting a bit nasty with you during this period. Whether it’s through text or if he manages to get you face to face, he’s not the type of person to hide how he feels, and right now he is feeling a lot.
“Well, I wouldn’t have to show up here if you would fucking unblock me and listen! Shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell, ok? I just…you have to hear me out. Please?”
The time apart from you, no matter how long, leaves him absolutely miserable. The distance does give him time to think, though. About everything you said to him that night, the issues you couldn’t bear anymore. If you can’t bear the problems, and he can’t bear to be away from you, some compromises will just have to be made.
I give it a month, max, before he comes back to you, now much more level-headed and solemn. He’s trying his hardest to make things right again. He just needs you to meet him halfway.
Pannacotta Fugo
Fugo knew you two had been on the rocks lately. He isn’t an idiot. Every argument, every miscommunication, every day you became a bit more withdrawn, it was all noticed and filed away carefully in his mind. But when you finally find the courage to sit him down and tell him it’s over, he still can’t control himself. He’s panicked, at first, until he hides that vulnerability behind a much harder and safer emotion: his anger.
The resulting outburst, of course, only serves to strengthen your resolve. This is exactly why you had to leave to begin with, and as much as you’d hoped he would have found it in himself to be civil, you knew it would go like this. He’s so upset he can hardly breathe, and when the yelling finally becomes too much, you leave him to fall apart alone.
With time, the rage subsides to simmering anger that lingers and persists for weeks. It’s easier to pretend he hates you for it. You left him, like everyone always does. He trusted you and loved you more than anyone else, and processing those feelings is just too painful, so he turns them into anger instead. At least that’s an emotion he knows what to do with.
It isn’t sustainable, though. Maybe it takes a push from Bucciarati or another friend, someone he respects enough to take correction from, but sooner or later he realizes he has to process these awful feelings. He misses you. Every day. And maybe you weren’t entirely wrong about your reasons for leaving. But if those reasons were things that could be changed…maybe this can still be fixed.
The next time you see him, he’s unrecognizable from the man you left screaming in his apartment. He’s nervous, clearly, but composed. He asks you gently if you have time to talk, and the tension visibly drains from his body when you agree.
He starts by apologizing for how things went that night. He shouldn’t ever speak to you that way, and he knows that. He just didn’t know how to control himself then, but he’s learning those skills now! If there’s one thing Fugo can do, it’s study, and he tells you all about the books he’s been reading to better himself. Topics ranging from anger management, to emotional intelligence, to relationship conflict.
He asks, anxiously, if you would be willing to give him another shot. He’ll even agree to see a couples counselor, if it makes you feel more comfortable. He knows that with his effort to improve, and your willingness to find better ways to work with him, you two can work all of this out. He just hopes you still think it’s worth the effort.
“I know I messed up, but I just wanted you to see that I’m trying. And I’m getting better. And I’d like to keep getting better with you, if that’s ok.”
Bruno Bucciarati
Bruno can’t say that he didn’t see this coming. The state of your relationship was clearly less than ideal. Bruno is a man who stretches himself thin, who gives so many pieces of his time to so many people and projects, that sometimes it can feel as if you’re only getting the leftover scraps of him.
He’d always assumed that he would be able to commit more of himself to you later. In the future, when Passione was stable, when the Don didn’t need him so much, when his community was safe without him. Of course, there’s no guarantee that any of these things would happen soon or ever, and his assumption that you would be willing to wait on him indefinitely is proven wrong.
Immediately, he tries to deescalate. Explaining that all of these problems are fixable, that he loves you so much, that maybe you should both just go to bed and things will feel better when you’ve slept on it.
“Slow down, amore. Shh, I know. Things have been difficult lately, but we can work through all of this. Just trust me, all right?”
As the conversation goes on and he sees that you aren’t going to be convinced, he begins to lose his composure. Bruno is a passionate man. In his time as a Capo he’s become accustomed to being obeyed, to having his every request carried out, and to having the absolute trust of most of the people he considers important to him. For you, his most important person, to be slipping out of his grasp with no control is not something he’s prepared to deal with. At least not gracefully.
You don’t think you’ve ever seen him so frantic as he is while you’re leaving. He tries to remain composed, but he can only stay so calm when he’s watching the love of his life prepare to walk out on him. You can’t do this. He can’t let you do this. He can take care of everything, he always takes care of everything, if you’ll just let him, don’t you see?
In the aftermath, he’s devastated. He throws himself back into his work, and to most people he would appear to be functioning just fine in your absence. To his team, however, this facade is easily seen through. He’s sharp. Barbed. A little more ruthless, a lot more unfocused. Giorno all but forces him to take some time off and recollect himself, and Bruno does so begrudgingly.
Time off is just time without a distraction. It hurts (and maybe digs up some trauma from his childhood that he didn’t realize he still harbored), but it also allows him to do some necessary reevaluations. Bruno cannot live without you. In the time he’s loved you, you’ve become his reason for the work he does. You’re the reason he wants to clean up these streets, the reason he needs his city to be safe, the reason he needs to be a strong and dependable figure, always improving, always moving forward.
I don’t think it would take him long to come to this conclusion. A month, max, before he seeks you out again, ready to offer himself back up you—as much of himself as he can. He’s ready to make compromises if you are too.
Narancia Ghirga
Dear god. Brace yourself lmao
Narancia’s abandonment issues run bone-deep. From the earliest stages of his life, the people he loves the most have been leaving him in one way or another. He cannot bear to be left behind again—especially not by you.
Prepare for screaming, crying, punching walls, and desperate begging. There’s no outcome where you and Narancia have a calm, respectful conversation about this. As soon as you mention leaving him, he’s spiraling. He needs you to take it back. He needs you to change your mind. He needs you to apologize and promise to never ever even think of leaving him again. He could never imagine walking out on you. How can you do this to him?
When you leave and the panic begins to wear off, he’s furious. He’ll oscillate between hopeless despair and anger, and you’ll be on the receiving end of both. Narancia is not leaving you alone. You may have to dissolve into tears yourself, pleading with him to just give you the space you need and work on getting himself over this. He may agree—temporarily. Even if he promises to stop showing up and bothering you in person, that doesn’t mean he can stop himself from texting you when he’s drunk in the wee hours of the morning.
“Fuck, how can you do this?! I’m sorry! Whatever I did wrong, I’m sorry and I promise I can fix it! Please, can we just talk?”
With enough time, he’ll have calmed down enough to at least have a more mature conversation about what happened. And that conversation will happen. It has to. He knows you asked him to stay away, but you have to understand that he can’t ever do that. He needs you, and he’ll do anything to prove that to you, no matter how long it takes.
Leone Abbacchio
Abbacchio’s immediate reaction is to shut down. It’s a self-preserving reflex more than anything, but to you it’s just confirmation that what you’re doing is right. You can’t keep begging for what he’s obviously not willing to give: vulnerability. Inwardly Abbacchio is crumbling, but the only response he allows you to see is irritation and cold indifference. Go ahead, leave him. It’s not like you were ever going to last to begin with, and it’s not like he can’t find another fuck-buddy whenever he wants.
This is, of course, a lie. You’ve never been just a hookup to him, but the fact that he could even say something so cruel to you is just more proof that you need to remove yourself from him. By the end of the argument, you’re crying and he’s waiting for you to shut the door behind you so he can finally break out the alcohol and get plastered.
Very few people would be able to sense that there was anything wrong with him. He falls back on his old method of disguising his misery: burying it under ten masks of indifference. He puts on a convincing performance, but he knows that’s all it is. You were a light in the dark trenches of his life, bright and warm and inviting, and he snuffed you out. One more colossal failure to haunt him at night.
He finds other partners. One night stands and shallow, meaningless hookups. They’re meant to be a distraction, but they’re only half-successful. His connection with you wasn’t just about physical pleasure, it was about an emotional connection that his other partners can’t replicate. He loved you, in a way he hasn’t loved anyone else.
It will take Abbacchio a very long time to work through this. He doesn’t just have to bite back his pride to ask for reconciliation, he has to overcome his self-loathing enough to allow himself to hope. When he does come back to you, he comes as a man who’s finally begun to build himself back up into someone he believes is worthy of you.
“Hey. I know it’s been a long time, but I just wanted to check up on you. And maybe, if it’s all right…could we go somewhere and talk? There are some things I wanted to tell you.”
