Truculentabs - Tumblr Blog

megamind being taught to be evil in prison

when you apply for your villain license they give you a book of all the new words you’re allowed to say. it’s full of shit like “foible” and “machinations”

Cannot stop thinking about Anne magill paintings. Maybe my new favorite painter. She just captures this ..,,,,,, dreamy feeling...,,, a certain tenderness..... a fleeting moment of contentedness..... like nothing else I’ve seen

do you ever laugh with your friends and think oh this is the point. this is the point of everything

when a human infant is in the womb, moments from being born, a vague figure of glowing amber light appears before them. in one hand, it holds a small soapstone carving of a coiled eel. in the other hand it holds a mortar and pestle made of polished red quartz. it bids the infant to choose between these two things, but we don't know the significance of this choice, because all babies throughout history with no exception have always picked the soapstone eel. so that's still one of the big mysteries out there.

take figures out of their boxes btw. sew patches on your favorite jacket. go to bed with your favorite plushes. wear the pants you usually save for special occasions. draw something cool on your wall. put a sticker on your laptop. dye your hair and pierce your lips. glass is meant to break, metal is meant to rust. items are meant to be used. that's how the world knows that somebody loved them.

one of the greatest tragedies in life is that you will always be loved more than you will ever know. someone in class finds your presence inviting and warm, even if you’ve only ever exchanged a few words with them—maybe none at all. someone on the street loves your smile and it gets them down the next few streets. someone you used to be friends with still wishes to fondly call your name. someone you used to be friends with five years ago would give anything to be in the same room as you today. someone who regularly comes into work is disappointed when you aren’t there to brighten their day. someone missed you today. someone noticed you were gone. someone loves you when you’re there; someone loves you when you’re nowhere to be found at all. you think you have always disappeared when you’re no longer in the picture, but you’ve never left the frame.

life is full of moments

9:30pm: this time im rly gonna do it

9:55pm: the simple and rightfully praised beauty of toasted bread w honey n butter

“oh I’m too old for stuffed animals” skill issue. sorry you can’t appreciate little creatures made to hang out with you, I on the other hand am full of joyous whimsy and therefore vastly superior.

people never change, we all want to see our friend minny getting their hand stuck under a whet stone immortalised forever

if i ever went back in time to ancient greece or rome i would bring a camera and just let them go hog wild taking pictures. i don't even mean the pericleses or the caesars i wanna see what demetrios son of costas does in the agora with a selfie stick and 100 gb of storage. i need to know what stupid pictures publius faustus the shepherd is going to take of his buddy menalcas getting his ass headbutted by a goat

hello people today i ask: what is your favorite artificial flavor, generally? like if you’re having a new artificially flavored thing and need to pick a standard flavor, what are you going for?

sorry, i just couldn't help but notice that you're calm and logical and reserved and associated with the color blue? well i'm hotheaded and impulsive and passionate and associated with the color red if you want to beat the shit out of each other or make out or something

literally me applying to jobs

“Can you explain this gap in your employment?” I must confess I dilly-dallied. Did a bit of this and that. Yes, I lived an ungoverned life of leisure throughout my youth. But I’m a changed man, I’m to be married and my prospective mother-in-law insists I have an annual income of £500,000 or more if I’m to wed her daughter. Rummy luck. My paltry stipend from my father is a mere £40,000 a month. I am attempting to make up the difference by seeking gainful employment for the first time in my life. This sunglass shack is the only establishment that graced me with a callback.

Going to the function and trying to impress everyone by correctly identifying all the planes flying over, i misidentify a 777 as an a330 and have to leave and cry in the car for 8 minutes then come back pretending to be my own twin

broth <3

life becomes so beautiful when you start cooking rice in liquids other than water

<3

Anne Carson (2009)

Arthur S. Way (1898)

George Theodoridis (2010)

Ian C. Johnston (2010)

E.P. Coleridge (1910)

Theodore Alois Buckley (1892)

John Peck, Frank Nisetich (1995)

R. Potter (1906)

M. L. West (1987)

William Arrowsmith (1958)

Philip Vellacott (1972)

Michael Wodhull (1782)

Kenneth McLeish (1997)

David Kovacs (2002)

Andrew Wilson (1993)

Euripides - Original (408 BCE)

the DELIVERY

via filmquaker on insta

Things That People Have Said To Me Since I Started Working In A Yarn Shop

“i need more of the rowan felted tweed, i’m making some first-world-war balaclavas and i’ve run out”

“i’m making my husband an x-files themed jumper for christmas and i can’t find a good colour for the spaceship”

“do you have any wool/acrylic blends on sale, i’m making hats for the seamen’s mission to give to sailors and i know they say to use acrylics because they’re cheap but it gets awfully cold at sea and i worry”

“i need some black wool for gloves, but it has to be flame-proof because i’m making them for the beltane fire-jugglers”

“could you see if you have another copy of this pattern for a baby shawl, i’ve knitted it in different colours for all of my six children and twelve grandchildren but it’s started to fall apart a bit"

[from a blond, six-foot surfer dude] “yeah, do you have any really light needles, i’m going backpacking around argentina and i want to do some socks while i’m on the coach but there isn’t much room in my rucksack”

“which of these colours do you think would be best for a knitted corgi”

“do you have any patterns for dog hats”

a whole religion is based off this

Some guy in Ancient Greece, pointing at a perfectly climbable mountain: There are gods up there!

The rest of Ancient Greece: Sick, no need to fact check that 

okay but why is this kid so fucking huge

“you think you’re the one who gets to kill me?” fghjvkfkkd

This is the greatest progression of events I have ever read, where’s my historical gay romance novel about this

*shows up 15 months late with starbucks* anyway here’s my vine compilation (volume warning!)