Dysphoria Is Kicking Our Ass Today, And We Just Woke Up An Hour Ago.

Dysphoria is kicking our ass today, and we just woke up an hour ago.

Today's gonna be fun. /sarc

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Evan (xe/they)

I want a binder! I want a binder!

I wish binders were free, man. This sucks, I don't want the jigglies anymore.

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Matthew (void/he/star/eclipse), Evan (xe/they), Eclipse (they/them)

Hi! Welcome to the Unmanipulated Diaries. We are Max or Kenneth (Kenny for short), otherwise known as the Eclipse Labyrinth Collective. We are a system that collectively identifies as a transmasc non-binary person.

Our parents are extremely transphobic. So much to the point that, when we first came out as genderfluid and later transgender to them about four years ago, we were forced back into the closet and manipulated into thinking that we were making it up and were just a girl. The Unmanipulated Diaries is our online diary recollecting our experiences of realizing we are transmasc non-binary and refusing to go back into the closet this time. Note, we are not out to our parents yet, we are simply out to friends who are aware of our situation and know not to use the correct names and pronouns around our parents.

Here, we will mostly talk about our experiences of being a transmasc non-binary  person living in a transphobic environment and how being disabled affects that. (We are both neurodevelopmentally and physically disabled, and as we are also an OSDD system, we have many alters that have various identities that causes struggles from time to time.)

There will be some posts on random things, but we'll try our best to keep it on "theme." If anyone ever has any questions about our experiences, disabilities, or just about anything else, send in an ask! We love receiving asks, they're a lot of fun for us.

Hope you have a great day!

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Michael (he/corpse/death), Andie (he/she/web)

Oh, man, we have so many interesting stories with these traits! We could ramble about examples of us showing each these symptoms if we wanted to. xD

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Evan (xe/they)

Autism Bingo!

Here’s mine

Here’s a blank below if you want to participate

Mrs. Speechie P

Absolutely love our cargo pants, makes us feel so masculine. <3

Just love our outfit in general, flannel is just so madculine-izing (in our opinion) and it's so nice.

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Andie (he/she/web), Evan (xe/they)

I can't wait for the day when we can get our leg amputated. It'll make our life so much easier, in regards to dressing more masculinity or androgynously, in regards to pain levels, and so much more.

For context, our left leg is extremely screwed up (as in permanent damage-wise). Our knee is our biggest issue, constantly in pain, frequently swelling, subluxating and dislocating, giving out and being unsteady, and more—and we don't even have a diagnosis about what's wrong because we can't see all of the damage on MRIs or x-rays! Our ankle is also an issue, with being weak and hypermobile from constantly spraining, straining, and rolling it in elementary school. And last but not least, tendinitis. In not one, but more recently TWO tendons in our lower leg. (There's three tendons in lower legs.)

Our left leg is literally a piece of crap.

Someone take it away, please. I beg you. ToT

- Max / Kenneth

Front: Evan (xe/they)