Red Dwarf Headcanons (w/ A Copius Amount Of Rimster)

Red Dwarf Headcanons (w/ a copius amount of Rimster)

Rimmer once stole Lister's guitar, repaired the missing strings, and tuned it and when Lister found out, he was upset until he tried playing it and realized that it didn't actually sound bad

With the guitar tuned, Rimmer still doesn't want to hear Lister play anything, but then Lister agrees to learn Edelweiss from The Sound of Music and Rimmer decides that he's allowed to play that

Rimmer then forces Lister to play Edelweiss for him whenever he can't sleep and although Lister gets sick of the song, he does it anyway because he knows it makes Rimmer happy

The two eventually move out of their bunkroom and into the Captains Quarters on Lister's suggestion because it has a bigger bed; Rimmer agrees to it because he likes the idea of occupying the room of the highest ranking officer on the ship

Lister can actually cook if he tries hard enough and has a recipe, meanwhile Rimmer cannot cook whatsoever; he attempted once and was henceforth banned from the kitchen

Rimmer is actually very physically affectionate but hates having to initiate it and so Lister learns all of Rimmer's unspoken cues for when he wants a hug or a hand to hold

Lister uses all sorts of ridiculous pet names for Rimmer just to get him worked up

The Cat will sometimes just come into Rimmer and Lister's room, sleep on the foot of their bed, and then if they question it he'll just say that it was the most comfortable spot in the moment

When Lister and Rimmer eventually want to get married, Kryten ends up officiating the wedding after taking an online course to get a license but then ends up objecting during the objections because he's upset that now he'll have one less set of sheets to launder

Rimmer is asexual and didn't realize it until he tried to make moves on Lister and Lister confronted him, asking if he actually wanted sex or if he just thought it was just what people are supposed to do in relationships (Rimmer totally thought it was just relationship protocol)

Rimmer will occasionally take Lister's leather jacket and wear it around because it makes him feel safe and loved

I'm so normal about this show that I'm totally not thinking about the fact that during season 3 of Red Dwarf Lister has what seems to be a smegging ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW POSTER HUNG UP ON HIS BUNK??? THE QUEER CULT CLASSIC??? LISTER I KNOW WHAT YOU ARE.

Me telling my friends that I am so normal about Red Dwarf after I wake up and then proceed to check all new Red Dwarf postings on ao3 and tumblr and cry a little bit when there isn't anything new and then start posting new stuff myself to fill the void before I sit down to rewatch Red Dwarf for the 6th time.

hello red dwarf community last night i had a dream about a non-existent edit where it was clips from rimmerworld put to the song 'i will wait for you' by connie francis and my soul cried a little

in order to convince my friends to watch red dwarf, i cranked out a brief summary of every single episode but i tried to make them all sound as stupid as possible to draw interest :) if yk, yk!

Currently thinking about the fact that during the gap between seasons 2 and 3 of Red Dwarf, Rimmer and Lister move into the officers quarters and yet choose to continue sharing a bunk? We know from Me^2 that they're fully aware that they can go to other rooms, but yet they choose to move all of their stuff all the way across the ship into a new bunkroom TOGETHER. Rimmer my man, my guy, my dude, my buddy, you claim that you find Lister to be disgusting, you say that you find him irritating, you say that you can't stand his snoring, and yet you CHOOSE to continue to share a bunkroom with him? Lister, my mate, my lad, you know that you'd prefer to have the bottom bunk because bottom bunks have more space, and you now have the entire ship to yourself, but yet you choose to continue sleeping on the top bunk just to share a room with Rimmer, the man you claim to be the most neurotic git in the universe? Guys they are so gay and in love. I cannot make this shit up.