Do You Ever Feel Yourself Spiraling? Falling Into That Scary, Dark, Lonely Hole? But You Know Theres

Do you ever feel yourself spiraling? Falling into that scary, dark, lonely hole? But you know there’s nothing you can do except let the feelings flow and try to think it through? But also you know that nothing really helps until it passes so you feel helpless?

For me he didn’t say anything. Until I asked for a response so I knew he saw it. Then he said “okay”. And I broke. And then I got over it for a bit until the feelings came back. Four years later. Now I blocked him and I’m trying to move on.

I wonder what you’d say if I told you how I felt

I’m feeling a little better today. But I think I’m covering the sadness and trying to distract myself by being positive. I am going through my dms and messaging people who made an impact on my life. Idk I mean I like when people tell me they’re grateful for me so I just want to make other people happy.

My friend and I were talking about how we could use a good hug. The kind where they squeeze you just tight enough and you feel safe. The kind where the world disappears and you feel at home. I bet that’s what hugging you would have felt like.

If I were to die, would you be sad? Would you have regrets or anything you wish you had said to me? I wish you would tell me everything now. But I think that’s just it. There’s nothing you want to say or need to do. I’m nothing to you.

I know it hasn’t even been a week since I blocked you but why are you still the main thing on my mind? Why can’t I be mad at you or hate you or something? Why can I only think about how you probably never cared about me even just as a person? Why do I still hope you’ll decide to message me or something? I know where you stand so why can’t I accept it and move on? I just wanna scream.