"I Wanna Be-"

"I Wanna Be-"

Dazai Osamu x reader

Summary: Rainy days are for remembering the good old moments with your bestfriend, who you have a lethal crush on, a confession of tears masked withing the downpour.

Word count: 1.2k

tw.: angst, angst with comfort at the end, fluffy end

The orange-ish dim glow of streetlights illuminating the vacant streets of Yokohoma, as the heavy rain clouds space out into the vast night sky, giving room for the moon to bleed out and shine like the sun at night.

He, too, was admiring the moon in all its shimering glory. Having a moment of silence for himself, he felt at ease, his soul is at peace while his mind is drowning in the sea of sorrow. His heart aching for the first time in years, that feel like centuries.

"Why didn't I react? What went wrong, I precalculated everything correctly? What...what went wrong? Why am I so cruel...I didn't mean to be cruel...I didnt mean to hurt you..."

The down pour, heavy, yet there's this weighing feeling deep inside you, a feeling of heartbreak rippingnyour heart apart in an agonizingly slow pace, a feeling that angers yet saddens that fast beating heart of yours that's being torn apart from the inside out, as if a secret that can't be kept for too long is fighting war battle for freedom.

You know the truth, or so you believe. He literally gave it to you, why must you... why must this stupid heart still long for someone who doesn't want anything to do with it?

Strolling along the soothing bay, admiring the city lights from afar, with your drenched hands in your, equally drenched pocket. The rain is pouring down harder, yet that seems to be the last of your concerns. The heavy rain clouds surrounding you is enough for anyone in close proximity to know that you're not doing well... unfortunately no ones near to make such discovery.

"Why did he word it like that? Did he truly mean it? He's never been so heartless in ages, let alone with someone as close as me...what have I done..."

The image keeps coming back in a series of constant replay, an unescapable nightmare.

The way soft lips spoke words your mind didn't process, because its full attention was on deciphering the meaning behind his eyes... those sky blue eyes that hold so much pain, so much wonder, so much knowledge...yet, the only emotion it displayed was...the lack of emotion. Blank. His eyes showed nothing, yes they were soft, and a faint hint of pity could be detected, but it's even more confusing wether that is self pity or not...

He was beyond shocked, taken aback, overjoyed even, yet something was holding him back...he felt guilty, he felt confused, he felt vulnerable, he felt as if he was letting you down...he knows you deserve someone better, someone happier, someone who's not an ex-executive mafioso who's currently working as a detective, not someone who drinks regularly and can't commit to staying alive. Ofcourse you deserved better! Even a foolish dog like Chūya would know that, so why didn't you understand?

Yet there you were, fighting back tears when he just left. He had straight up left you to cry on the cols, brittle side walk, with rain and tears pouring down your face.

Shutting your eyes in an attempt to drown out all of those useless haunting memories. Standing on the edge stairs, focusing on keeping a good balance, so you wouldn't end up drenched in dirty river water.

"Why is the water so...so soothing...maybe if I sit down and relax for a bit, I'll be fine..." body weight shifting from one foot to another as if you were loosing conscious, but due to the skull shattering heavy down pour accompanied by spine shivering gales. Stepping a step lower into the water, your shoes were completely submerged, a cold shiver shot up your spine as you froze in place.

It felt good, for now it feels tranquil.

Deep breath in, Deep breath out...

...a familiar, contrast to the weather's temperature, warm scent of cigarette smoke, a little booze...dull mint...green tea... and home. The smell of home.

And before you knew it, you let him pick you up bridal style, carrying your cold body all the way back up onto the main road, even there he didn't let go, gripping you tightly to his chest, avoiding eye contact.

He somehow managed to carry and hold up an umbrella over the two of your, fresh rain-water drenched, heads.

Facing each other for the first time in what felt like, eternity. You two have faced off many times before, but this...this one feels different. Drastically different.

Emotions come into play here, strong emotions.

He never meant to make you cry, he never meant to hurt you, yet here you were hesitating wether to hold him close or keep an arms length distance between you two. Even though the tension in the air was as dense as winter snow, he held the umbrella out for you, covering your head, exposing his own.

"I'm... I'm sorry. I am so sorry." Head held low, his voice strained, he was trying his best not to crack. His voice was shaky. Shivering, even though he was way better dressed than you for the weather.

Dazai Osamu, ex executive at the Port Mafia, currently working as a detective for the Armed Detective Agency, a man with mind that of hundreds, yet body of one. One of the strongest people in Yokohoma.Someone who drank his sorrow, his pain away...was here apologizing?

By this time, his hand was shivering, from the cold? Or the fear of rejection. The fear of loosing someone so close to him, his other half ( sorry Chūya), someone who, almost, knows every secret about him. He can't let you go...you know too much.

Embracing him as a form of apology was an unspoken rule between you two. Through out the years of hatred and comradery, whenever there was a disagreement you'd agree to disagree in a civil way.

He gripped you tighter, stronger, closer. Instead of his usual delicate and gentle manner, he was more...direct, blunt. His head resting on your shoulder, nuzzling closer into you nape of your neck, his breathing was unsteady, rapid. He is afraid of letting you go, he is afraid you'll leave, again, but for real this time...he...he wants you to stay. He wants you to be there with him. He wants you to be his, he finally processed the information, but by then you had already left him...he doesn't want that again.

The umbrella collecting rain on the ground, very well forgotten, while Dazai was being vulnerable, letting his guard down, showing that he fully trusts you.

"Please..." his voice croaked, trying his best to regain composure. " I'm sorry...don't ever leave me...I need you..."

Hugging you tighter, his voice was muffled, faint sobs could be heard from him. All you could do is reciprocate. Holding him up, kissing his forehead and whispering an endless string of consoling words filled with love and comfort, what he needs the most right now.

He needs you.

Bouncing on one of Dan Heng's cocks while the other just rests up against your stomach, both of you trying to hold in your moans and whines, so you don't wake up the rest of the express crew.

Holding onto his glowing horns, that remedy to glow brighter at night, with a deadly grip as his tries to muffle your, and his, lewd moans and whimpers. He has a soft hand on your waist, while the other rests against your shoulder, near your neck.

His pitchforked tongue making out with your mouth, while the hand that was resting on your shoulder slowly slid down to play with your nipples. You moaned into the kiss, making him buck his hips into yours. Your pace quickened. He knew you were nearing your high.

"Dan Heng~, Dan Heng!~ please, please let, m me cum~"

He gave you a weak nod and a chaste kiss on the lips before his pace quickened, rubbing his other cock while he bucked his hips against you. Nibbling on your collar bone, neck, shoulder, even biting down onto it when he felt really good. He was nearing his high too. Soon, he gripped both sides of your hips with his hands and fucked you out in an insane inhumane speed. (His stamina is something).

Moaning his name continuously, trying your best to whimper quietly, but it doesn't work (I'm sure poor March can hear it in her room), he knows your close, and when you start clawing at his back? Crying his name, yeah that gets him over the edge, so what does he do?

"Darling, darling, let's cum together, okay?"

His voice is shaky, catching his breath as he holds you down onto his dick causing the both of you to moan. His other cock released aswell, onto your tummy, painting you in his cum, while the other one filled you up to the brim.

After this he layed you down onto his soft dinky little mattress, reaching over to the towel, that was prepared by him along side with a bottle of water, and started taking care of the mess he caused, while admiring the amount of marks he left.

You're his...and he knows that very well, but he just can't help himself sometimes, he'll kiss the really visible ones as a form of apology.

"-Yours."

Nakahara Chūya x reader

Summary: Rainy days are for remembering the good old moments with your bestfriend, who you have a lethal crush on, a confession of tears masked withing the downpour.

Word count: 0.8k

tw.: angst with comfort, fluffy ending, angst, fluff, comforting end

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Storm clouds gathered above the lively streets of Yokohoma, even though the weather forecast mentioned there to be a horrible storm later tonight, the weather was irresistible.

Fresh smell of petrichor, the streets were relatively empty, only a few cars driving by, the places that were filled with people were those apartments high in buildings all partying and spending time with their loved ones, cherished ones, the people they hold closest to them.

He hated, hated hated absolutely despised it with every part of his being, arguing with you, the storm clouds were gathering at an alarming quick scale and you haven't returned home, yet. He's worried sick, taking a few more shots before making the sober decision to go find you.

Although, the apartment houses lights shone brightly illuminating the dark sky and vacant city streets as the clouds grew darker and bigger, ot was said that there was going to be heavy rain fall and thunderstorms the entire night and perhaps the following day.

What if you get caught in the downpour? What if you get stuck somewhere and maybe get kidnapped? He trusts you and knows your capabilities, but he's closely familiar with what lurks in the dark at night, what preys on those seem particularly vulnerable in whatever way, what can hurt and destroy a healthy soul...he's seen it all and the last thing he wants if for you to be caught, captured tortured all the while he wait at home, naively and do nothing? Unacceptable.

He'll never forgive himself for this, he needs you, he wants you safely tucked in a blanket with him in the comfort of your room, like you two always did. He wants to be near you, without you he' won't be himself, he won't feel human. Everyone left him, he can't let you go...not when it was a misunderstanding on his part.

Small drops of water started descending from the sky, the soothing sound of rain accompanying your every step, but not when you're practically drenched, but does it matter? Right now... even this place is good enough to clear your mind. Walking towards the iconic bridge in Yokohoma, a few cars passed by splashing you with dirty rain water, you were clearly underdressed for this weather.

All this time, you thought he liked you, he wanted to be with you, but no? A lie? Or have you fallen too deeply for him? Even he knows he has good looks, he knows you like him. Him, and no one else.

Another car passed by, eleventh one? Who knows, no one is counting, getting splashed again and again, today really is a shitty day. The day's grey, the clouds are dark, puddles littered across the road, no one to call at such a late time of day, no ones hand to hold when yours are so cold... no one...

Tears start streaming down your cheeks, mixing with the raincloud's tears. The weather is a perfect replication of the current storm inside your heart. It started to rain heavier, until the droplets started hurting. Feeling a bit lightheaded, sitting down on the railing of the bridge to collect yourself isn't be that bad of an idea, you've already been completely drenched in water, tears and sweat.

A cold chill runs down your back as you sit and admire the wilding waves of the raging river below you, so far down.

He knew where you were, you two would always go for walks there, he knows you and you knew that. He knows your little habits too, he saw you didn't leave with anything to cover yourself, were you that angry with him? He's feeling more guilty now. Rushing through the empty streets on his motorbike, the only thing on his mind, at the moment, was your safety.

Hearing an engine arrive and shut off behind you, the sound was all too familiar. A familiar scent engulfed your senses as you felt two cold hands hug you from behind, pulling you close to himself trying to radiate any warmth he possibly could.

It was a silent plea, "please come home, I'm sorry". Whenever you two got into an argument or misunderstanding this is how he apologized to you. You leaned back into the embrace, letting him pick you up and place you onto the ground, draping his coat over your head as he rubbed your back trying to slow your heartbeat down, before explaining himself and apologizing. Once your sobs slowly subsided, he kept hugging you. The moment he touched you he had his ability on, shielding you and him from the rain.

Hiyaaaa!! Can I request a headcanon with Dazai and Chuuya (separately) where them and reader gets in a pretty heated argument and reader leaves the house. But when they come back they smell like alcohol? And when (Chuuya and dazai) ask where were they, they try to avoid the question. Making them believe that they cheated on them. When they didn't? Could you also make hurt/comfort?

(I'm sorry if it doesn't make sense!!!)

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A/n : Hii sorry again if I made any grammar mistakes and this is kinda short ,</33 and yes you can request this ! I hope u enjoy this fic .<3

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Osamu Dazai

Honestly, Your both arguments started off as a silly harmless joke to you crying and storming out of your house.

He felt really guilty as soon as you slam the door shut.

He called you multiple times since it was getting late and you're still not home yet.

But to not avail your phone was on silent and do not disturb, so you couldn't hear your phone ringing.

It was 11:43pm.Dazai heard keys ringing on the other side of the door and assumed it was you

He ran to the door just to see your cheeks bright red

Asks you where did you go, until he noticed you smell like alcohol

You don't drink. Ofc that's what he thought but the argument drove you to drink some alcohol to get your mind off the argument

He asked where did you go again but you tried to avoid his question and walked straight into your bedroom

He didn't think much of it and decided to ask you in the morning but when he heard you sobbing in your bedroom floor while your back is pressed against the wall his heart shattered into millions of pieces

Instantly asks you what's wrong while hugging you, smoothing your back trying to comfort you.

After you told him everything he apologized and promise to never bring this up again.

Takes good care of you for the rest of the night. Ofc he will settle down with the teasing.

At the end you both are cuddled up and falling asleep into each other's arm.

Nakahara Chuuya

He hates having arguments with you and barely have any arguments with you, that's until one night.

There were tears running down your cheeks while you both continued to throw insults at each other.

You had enough.After doing all the extra work your boss assigned for you, it was a stressful day and you came home just to argue with your boyfriend.

You turned around and grabbed your bags and storm out of your both shared house.

Unlike Dazai, He didn't care until it was getting late and you're not home yet.

He started to feel guilty and worried for you.

As the clock hits 11:00pm he heard the front door unlocked.

He slowly went to check to see if it was you or not. He felt relieved after knowing it was you returning home safely.

Instantly apologized until he smelled a strong alcohol and perfume smell. A scent he never smelled on you before.

Will go silent for a minute and asked you where did you go.

You tried to avoid his question but he didn't gave up asking.

You took off your shoe and hung your coat on the coat rack, slowly making your way to sit on the sofa, tears starting to build up in your eyes.

As you tried to talk and explain tears are already flowing down your cheeks.

He comforted you as you explained that it was your new perfume that u got from your friend as a birthday gift.

After explaining everything to him he apologized to you and said he didn't mean those hurtful stuff he said to you and he truly doesn't wanna lose you.

You choked out a sob while hugging him back, apologizing too.

The night ended up being you two cuddling and showering each other with kisses, as if the argument never happened.

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I'm so sorry if some part doesn't make sense but I hope you enjoyed it, also I accidentally pressed on this thing and idk how to get rid of it so I'll just put random questions in them 😭

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𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐎 𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐒

notes: nsfw! content

characters included : xiao, wanderer, aether, kazuha + heizou!

#𝐗𝐈𝐀𝐎

The yaksha has been a virgin all his life. You would be the first woman who is allowed to touch him, so naturally, he's very nervous. He didnt ever think that he'd become so intimate with someone. These mortal feelings were useless. Thats what he always thought. But when you came along, everything changed.

The first time you had sex with him, he was unsure and careful at first. He was trying not to hurt you. But after the first night, he became addicted. He wanted more. More of you. Your sounds, your body. Everything. You were like a drug and he was your addict.

#𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐑

Inexperienced. He's never loved someone like this before, but despite never having sex, he was so good at it. He knew what he was doing, how to make you moan and scream his name. The way his fingers worked you, the way his lips sucked your neck, the way his voice whispered in your ear. It was all too much. He was a natural. He didn't take long to get used to the idea of sex, either. He was quick to learn your body, memorizing it like it was a map.

His favorite was taking you from behind, grabbing your hair and pulling you back into his thrusts.

#𝐀𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑

Aether was a virgin before you. He was scared to hurt you, worried he wasn't big enough to please you. But, as soon as he pushed in, his worries melted away. You were so tight, warm, and wet. You felt so good around him, and he had never felt anything better in his life. You'd never seen him so desperate and needy. His face was so red and he couldn't even speak. He wanted to feel you. All of you.

His favorite thing is being able to see your face. He loves to watch the faces you make when you cum, and the way your eyes roll back as you do. #𝐊𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐇𝐀

A gentle lover, wanting to make sure you were satisfied. He took his time, wanting to learn what made you moan, and what you liked the most. Your first time with his was pretty vanilla. His thrusts were fast but not rough. You could feel the love he had for you radiating off him with every gentle but passionate kiss he gave you.

Kazuha's favorite position is missionary. He likes being able to look into your eyes as he's inside you, and be able to kiss you wherever he wants.

He also loves to intertwine your hands with his whilst he thrusts into you.

#𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐙𝐎𝐔

Heizou's sex drive is high. He fiddles with his handcuffs, thinking of new ways to please. You can bet his mind is filled with lustful thoughts about you.

His favorite position is to fuck you in a standing position, your legs wrapped around his waist as he fucks you into the wall. He loves the way your tits bounce against him and the way your nipples brush up against his own.

general taglist: @ciarchivez@m0uchie @franaby @hiraethsdesires@wanderingconstellations@serenitiiy @yzashaven @adeptuscharm@trxshhsstufftatsumimiko@bredbyscara @qqingque @bxbblenajimi @v3lv3tf0x @missunstxble @sleepycoffeecups

DAY 5 — APHRODISIACS

kinktober 2023. — masterlist | ao3

𖧡 — including — tighnari, kazuha

𖧡 — warnings — fem! reader, aphrodisiacs, dry humping, cowgirl, a little sweaty (side effect of the drug) & lots of cum, feral feral feral, both parties are consenting

𖧡 — TIGHNARI

before you can blink, tighnari presses a metal, at a size of a toothpick, with a drop of crystalline liquid against your tongue, the fluid thawing into your flesh before you're closing your mouth, watching how he's planting the exact same dose on the inside of his lips— moreover, in just a matter of time the bizarre solution began to express certain signs on the state of your body and overall mental capacity when you're touching all over each other, lightheaded tearing and feeling each other up, as if detained by a beclouded response.

the wet sounds of your lips crushing on top of his, rounding your tongue inside his mouth in an almost animalistic rush while your nails were desperate to rake over tighnari's scalp, digits brushing over his sensitive ears to pull him close, the kissing turning heavy when he settles one of his hands on your back, squeezing you against his scorching hot, reactive body with his growing erection nestled in between, in dire need to expose of those tight, uncomfortable pants.

it feels like torture was slowly being forced on to the both of your bodies— despite it being tighnari himself assuring you about the strange substance he was researching on, that you will experience a sense of unwavering calmness, hand in hand with a collected perception by an additional seventy percent.

the side effects would barely show themselves, he promised before muttering something under his breath, but now— the obscene sounds of sloppy kissing slowly drilled and conquered your mind, by now being pressed tightly against the bed, your pussy soaked through the flimsy material of your panting and clenching in longing for his cock to finally bore inside.

tighnari humps his aching cock into your clothed pussy, adding and greatly fueling the frustration and helplessness, if neither of you don't turns out mad because of the mixure taking your mind hostage, you would certainly go mad from lust.

whilst, particularly how tighnari was placing his length just the right way on your core— with towering on top, adjusting his hips and grinding in between your folds until all the way up to your clit, he rubs you there too, thrusting fast with no remorse as to how you're being ruined by not only the drug rampaging inside your blood, but him appearing feral alike.

"fuck—" tighnari moans, "i feel.. hot." and almost winces, cupping the side of one of your thighs to pull you close, his disheveled clothes glued on his body due to the excess sweat the drug was producing, his lips shortly after trailing down against your ear to your neck which also had a faint film of perspiration on top, causing the helplessly rocking of his hips pressed against your wet pussy to increase, hitting extremely near to an orgasm without even taking your clothes off.

"baby.. please." you say, "tighnari— i feel so good.." you repeat and say it loud enough that it would suffocate you— and everything feels heavy around your muscles, your drenched clothes webbed on your skin, the humidity of the room burdening a hefty amount that it limits your capability to breathe as tighnari hides in the nook of your neck, your head falling back before he ends up to shifts his entire weight on top of your body.

you're distorted with pleasure, welcoming the blows of his hips rutting into your clothed pussy as your panties messily crumble against your folds— dried up with your arousal and a surplus of sweat you have to tell tighnari about adding on to the possible side effects.

although in spite of that, neither of you cared about that presently, tighnari was more so occupied on crumbling his eyes down to your wet, fluttering hole and your underwear soaked, presenting the outline of a perfect cunt to his hankering gaze.

𖧡 — KAZUHA

kazuha grins widely at you, drunken on a literal winning smile when you swallow down the strange pill he flaunted in front of your very curious, enchanting eyes— to take it, gulp it down and let it work it's so called “magic”, as he tends to say, whereas his hands were there to take you, listlessly going around the plush of your ass while he's aiding you in straddling his lap.

interestingly enough, it has merely been a good ten minutes before your reactive senses sharpened and you perceive everything to a greater degree now— the aphrodisiac expanding in your system, littering around your body to work when you flinch at the uncommon sensation, then whine against kazuha’s lips, melting your tongues in a heated exchange. his traces and rubs on you felt like fire against your hypersensitive flesh, but, archons, how come being on fire suddenly feels so unexpectedly good?

with deft movements, kazuha clumsily unbuttons his pants and tugs them down his legs so they'd hang uselessly around his knees, opening the view to his cock throbbing in between your thighs— he's swollen and his girth looks in pain, and you're taking it in your hand before placing your cunt right on top, small, needy ruts sending shivers down the entirety of your spine.

his mouth finds yours the second your hips roll into his ache, hungrily pressing your core on him yet all you really longed for was for him to sink his cock inside you, right now, please.

neither of you was intending to wait any longer, especially with the pent up frustration growing and being amplified by a ten fold. you quickly push your panties aside, your boyfriend watching you intently whilst drinking in the moans you'd let out against his lips from his cock fusing on your soaked cunt, his mouth attaching around your every curve on your face as you hear him sigh heavily against your ear.

whilst kazuha was left with no choice, thinking that if he wasn't about to slide his cock inside your warm, wet cunt, he would end up exploding from the painful bristling on his groin, together with your hearts racing and synchronizing, chests pressed against one another, his free hand helping you to take him inside as you're sinking down on his inches, swallowing him whole, the movements slow yet powerful enough to have you whine through a clenched jaw, responding to the slow, deep kisses of his swelled tip nudging against your fuzzy patches with gentle ruts of his cock, jointly with his other hand swiping over your hips, your body jolting at the contact of his nails digging into the plush of your ass.

and when it's all said and done, the drug had sent you into a frenzy, the small dose of the aphrodisiac long since devouring you.

by contrast, kazuha was insatiable, the sweet moans from your lips growing a warm, flushed shade on his face as his cock drags against the spongey spot within your walls, hips rolling, pressing inside the flesh fast and your cunt giving his length good squeezes that he's sighing your name in a breathy heave. the stickiness between your legs and across kazuha's lower stomach making your toes curl in both embarrassment and the need to continue.

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