Oh My God, YES! This Is Exactly What I Had In Mind, Thank You So Much For Making This Come True, It Was

Oh my god, YES! This is exactly what I had in mind, thank you so much for making this come true, it was truly glorious!

Honestly like:

Kidnapper/thief: Are you scared little thing?

MC:

Suitors mentioned above:

Hi again! So I had this, I think, glorious idea for headcanons. Can I please request Dazai, Comte, Leo, Theo and Jean (if that's alright) where they're out with their s/o and they get jumped or kidnapped and the thieves/kidnappers threaten to stab the s/o, but the s/o has a total gen z moment and is like "Try me. I welcome death with open arms. Do it coward." It's just so funny to me and I hope it makes sense. Thank youu! ^^

This really was glorious. The way I laughed just trying to think about how this would go down. You with your galaxy brain over here. I just hope you like it!

Dazai:

⦁ If you didn't before then you now have this mans upmost respect lol

⦁ He is chuckling before he even saves you. Dark humor is something he can't help but find amusing

⦁ You have to teach him more about that kind of humor from your time. He wants to have a few of those lines on hand should an opportunity come up to use them

⦁ After he saves you of course

Comte:

⦁ You do remember he's the immortal one here right?

⦁ He's to focused on the problem at hand, aka the knife in the thieves hand, to deal with anything else

⦁ After everything is said and done, expect to get the Look

⦁ He has a whole mansion full of big personalities though so really this is far from the worst thing he's had to endure hearing

Leo:

⦁ It takes about .2 seconds for him to realize that you are in fact not serious

⦁ You want to kill him, don't you? Just cause he's a vampire doesn't mean his heart didn't just drop while his brain fought to catch up

⦁ He's just gonna pretend he didn't hear that till you're safe

⦁ It'll be the walk home that he reacts. Just silent till about halfway when he just starts chuckling, turning to you with amusement, "Do it coward?"

Theo:

⦁ This might the one time Theo is shocked into silence

⦁ Cue him and the kidnapper both looking at you like "you wanna run that by us again chief?"

⦁ Once he's done knocking out some teeth he's got questions for you. He knew you could be careless but really hondje?

⦁ Honestly, he should really be used to this kind of thing by now from dealing with Arthur

Jean:

⦁ If that isn't the most relatable thing he's ever heard

⦁ Not that it makes him worry about you any less. Jean isn't the fastest when it comes to understanding jokes or sarcasm

⦁ Once he's dealt with the thieves expect him to ask you about it. You are going to have to break down the joke for him and why it was funny at the moment

⦁ He still doesn't get it. But you're safe and he knows that you don't ACTUALLY want to die so he doesn't dwell on it

The state in the middle of a depression nap and depression awakeness: depression awakening.

The dissapointment from waking up from a depression nap, crisis over what the fuck do I do now and then after a crying session fueled by feelings of hopelessness going to do activities typical for depression awakeness.

opposite of depression nap. depression awakeness. refreshing the same three websites over and over. there’s nothing new on any of them. eight seconds have passed and it feels like a century

Oh my, thank you! I actually love Brahms, he's so precious (if I push aside the almost yandere behaviour he showed near the end of The boy XD) This was so nice, thank you so much, I really loved it ^^

Hi! If you're still taking requests, I'd like to ask for a matchup ^^ I'm panromantic and nonbinary (but all pronouns are fine with me), I like art, especially reading, writing and drawing/painting. I also love nature and learning about it (learning in general). Although I try ro be kind and respectful to everyone, I am not afraid to fuck shit up to stand up for someone. I have problems with mental health (mainly depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts/tendencies) and cope with selfharm. (1/2)

i pair you with, 

Brahms heelshire! 

he loves your artistic skill and will go crazy if you draw/paint him! he will carry the drawings round in his pocket if possible, or hang it in his den if it’s a painting. 

he finds books about nature and animals in the library that he leaves on your bed or nightstand, and he especially enjoys it when you read those books out loud. 

he tries to help you with all of your metal health problems, making sure you feel safe and happy. 

if you are having a bad episode of depression he will be more clingy than usual, but not for selfish reasons. he wants to give you kisses and head pats, 

he tries okay?

thank you for the ask! 

and i’m sorry if i didn’t describe your mental health properly, i have no experience with it but i tried to do it well. 

At first, I had no idea that talking to your f/o's was considered as self-shipping. It started happening by itself and I was like: Am I going crazy??

But it didn't feel bad 95 percent of the time (the other 5 I triggered myself into a panic attack/a breakdown, but that's 'cause I'm a dumbass XD) so I just let it happen. And then I learned about self-shipping and platonic f/o's and... Yeah, here we are XD

Never be embarrassed about having conversations with your f/o’s!

If you imagine them reacting to something you see or do, that’s great! They like to be involved in your day to day life.

If you talk out loud and imagine that they answer, that’s so good! They like your voice a lot. They love to hear you say their name, especially. It gives ‘em butterflies.

Do they hold your hand while they talk to you? Hug you? Sit next to you, knees touching? Do you lean in closer to them? Adorable. They might even fall asleep on your shoulder sometimes.

Personally, I keep a running note on my phone of our silly or interesting conversations. I like to look back at them and laugh with them at something they said or remind myself of a sweet compliment they gave me. I’m particularly fond of the time one of them couldn’t pronounce ‘enchilada’ and spent an hour repeating it over and over and pestering all my other f/o’s about how it’s supposed to be pronounced.

Sometimes they like to pop in out of nowhere and give their two cents. Sometimes when I can’t sleep they count sheep for me. When I’m studying Japanese, my Japanese voiced f/o’s help me practice. Sometimes they talk to each other, not just to me! Sometimes they take a phone call or talk to someone else from their source material. Sometimes they even talk to someone from a different source material. Sometimes I rewatch their source material and they have a running commentary- “Yeah, that guy was a jerk.” Or “I had a scar from that fall for weeks!” Or even “You can’t tell, but (other character) was behind the camera making stupid faces at me this entire scene.”

Talking to your f/o’s isn’t weird, it isn’t just talking to yourself- it’s a dialogue between you and someone you love. And they love talking to you. Even if you ramble, even if your thoughts go a mile a minute or trail off to something unrelated, they’ll listen. Even if they have absolutely no idea what you’re talking about, they get to hear your voice, and that’s what matters.

FINALLY

SOMEONE

FUCKING

GETS IT

i found it i found my favorite artistic and literary movement holy jessica christ

Thank you so much, this was honestly so soothing! Oh, I'd hate to make them worried like this, but then again it'd be nice to have someone like that, so I'm torn XD. Thank you so much again!

Hi! I'm from the messages! I hope it's alright to ask now... I've read your rules and If it isn't too much to ask, could I request headcanons with Simeon, Solomon (and whoever else you'd want to choose) with a suicidal s/o? Either having thoughts or attempting, doesn't matter and I don't care what pronouns you choose. Comfort fics like these help me cope so much, but if It's too much that's alright. Thank you so much, hope you have a great day!

Yes love i remember.

Before I start this request I will repeat what i have said many times before

IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW NEEDS TO TALK/A SHOULDER TO CRY ON/HELP, PLEASE REACH OUT TO SOMEONE. MY MESSAGES ARE ALWAYS OPEN FOR YOU GUYS

Warning: mentions of suicide, suicidal thoughts

SIMEON + SOLOMON with a suicidal MC

Simeon:

This is such a tough topic for him because to him, you are beautiful, inside and out. You are God's child and his friend/lover. Why would you want to give up your life? Put those blades away, dear, and flush the pills. Theres no need for such extreme measures; talk to him. Let him hold you. He will run his fingers gently across your back, pushing you into his chest. He hates to see you like this, and quite honestly he feels as lost as you are. What brought this on? Please talk. Hes here. Youre not any less of a person just because you have worries clouding your mind. Youre not worthless or good for nothing. You are a person with valid feelings and thoughts, now you just need to learn how to control them. And he will help you, every step of the way.

Solomon:

His heart would drop. Why? The question would cloud his mind over and over again, knowing that there was no singular simple answer. He, too, would be at a loss. He would try to reach out, gently pulling you into his arms, and he would silently cry with you. You mean so much to him, why do you think this is the only way out? He can get you help. He can be your help. You cant just leave him! There's other options. Hold on, please, to him and for him. Things will get better, he promises. Dark times pass and good times will come. Just keep fighting for a little bit longer, for him. And yourself. He'll walk this rough path with you and he won't give up on you.