Roachsauce - Flygon Enthusiast - Tumblr Blog
i have been constantly in tears over this newly hatched duck i found on instagram last night
“Living weapon” covers a lot and all of it is hot
baby bird burrito!!! that boy likes to be so cozy! and a part of him never grows out of it….
i’m a little stressed rn so i wanted to draw bruce putting on clark’s flannel when he thinks no one is looking…. and dick <3
artist in denial of being depressed: omg this 2 month long art block has been crazy... sorry i haven't updated any of my fics in a long while! it's just been super difficult to daydream! so weird that i've lost a little bit of passion for my current comfort character and ocs... this couldn't possibly have any implications or alternative explanations
USERNAME LORE GIVE IT TO ME NOW YOU ALL
Father and daughter bonding time ft. Deadpool
Jason would wear tanker boots.
Forget the obsession with laced combat boots and all those other military grade footwear. Jason wouldn't wear laces. They're impractical. They're flammable. They're dangerous. That was the only good thing about the og Robin suit.
He'd have tanker boots. With straps and buckles. They're made to be easier to remove, and that can be a simple comfort if he's coming back home injured and just wants to get out of the heavy getup. Or y'know, if he rolls an ankle on wild bat stunts and it swells.
They also have better circulation! Tankers can spend a lot of time sitting. Jason's not a stranger to long stake outs either.
Anyway, tanker boots.
truly nothing about house md prepares you for wilson. he's fucking insane. he's been divorced three times. he's the only person who can scheme just as well as house. he gives a patient his own liver bc he felt bad for him - a patient who didn't even know wilson's name. btw. he noticed a patient had depression bc he never mentioned his grandkids. he starred in a porno. he dosed house with antidepressants for several weeks. he allowed his boybestie and his gf to share custody of him and didn't even try to stop it. house told him to buy a piece of furniture that represented who he was, and he bought a $4000+ organ for house. he was gonna torpedo his career to talk abt euthanasia bc one of his patients suffered longer than he had to. he let house move into his 1 bed apartment bc his therapist thought it'd be a good idea. this man would do anything for anybody if they let him. he'd fucking quit his job to save a snail off the sidewalk. bro is not normal in the slightest
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BATFAM BIRTHDAYS IN AUGUST I CAN’T KEEP TRACK :shinji chair:
anyway!!! hitting two birds with one stone HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JASON AND ALFRED WOO 🎉🎉🎉
i am forcibly furry-izing your batfam (human version)
Generation 4: Make a nice, homemade pastry for your Pokémon! With some berry infusion it’s sure to be tasty!
Generation 6: Play fun games and collect sweet tasty puffs for your Pokémon to eat! They’ll surely love them!
Generation 3: We used our SCIENCE GRINDER to mash berries into PERFECT MATHEMATICAL CUBES that pokemon CANNOT RESIST for their GEOMETRICAL REGULARITY
Generation 7: travel to the mythical Beane Land™…. meet the Beanse Guardian……. Collect Bean™ for yuor creatures?. maybe you will return. maybe not. unlock ALL secret beanes islands for ALL your beaning. needs
Cassandra Cain is the most character of all times cause everyone around her is like "oh no, we need to explain to her how to people properly" meanwhile her internal monologue is something along the lines of "I'm surrounded by idiots (affectionate) but it's okay, they can't help that I'm better than them".
It's especially hilarious when she's clearly in the wrong. Like I wish we had more female characters like that.
To anyone who thinks Bruce has a clear and consistent favourite child I raise you this: it is infinitely funnier for Bruce to have a complicated and elaborate “ranking” system of his kids that only he’s privy to.
Picture this: Batman, dosed with truth serum, gets asked as a gag from one of the goons holding him captive who his favourite bat-vigilante is and instead of giving a straight answer, he launches into this whole explanation about the ranking system and who’s in the current lead, who’s hanging behind, etc. At some point (this is a mystery to everyone involved) a whiteboard appears and he starts explaining his system like he’s a football coach before an important match. Out of nowhere he starts pulling out little cardboard cutouts of his kids and pins them to the board. At some point the red string comes out.
Jason hasn’t killed someone in a week? Automatically promoted to favourite. Tim hasn’t caused an international incident in the past month? Puts him a few points ahead that keep decreasing the longer he refuses real sleep (20 minute power naps don’t count Tim! Says powernap inventor Bruce Wayne). Cass gave him a hug this morning and wished him a good day? Favourite until he gets a call from dick telling him (without shouting!!!!) that he’ll be there for this week’s Sunday dinner. Duke accidentally scratches the Batmobile? Demoted to the “in trouble” zone (which, honestly, that’s where his kids spend most of the time in😭). Damian did not attempt to free all the animals in the zoo they visited? Favourite. Until Bruce found out he was just trying to conceal the cat hidden in his room that Bruce explicitly forbade him from keeping.
Dick arrives at the family dinner with a busted shoulder and a bruise the size of Texas on his face? Gets demoted so far down that even azraeil scores higher than him. He’s in the “in trouble” zone for a constant month after that. Oh one of them survived an almost death? Favourite for at least the next week. At least. Multiple people survive an almost death? EVERYONES the favourite. The least favourite is the growing grey hairs on his head.
The end of day results are decided by who bothers to wish him goodnight and if all of them have fucked up in some way the past week then Jon (Kent) becomes the automatic favourite until someone cracks a joke that Bruce actually finds funny.
The favourite child changes daily, hourly even, and his kids are aware this system exists and keep trying to crack the code but he always Knows and just smirks smugly.
BatCat as that one picture of Christian Bale and Samantha Mathis
more Dad Things that Bruce Wayne definitely does:
makes the kids hold the flashlight when he’s working on the Batmobile and yells at them when they don’t do it right
makes lots of weird gross dad noises (groaning, hacking, etc)
snores like a fucking freight train. like seriously, there should be a noise warning on his bedroom door
snack tax in the car!!! reaches his hand back and does the little grabby thing
“when was the last time you changed your oil”
gives the worst directions
“so you’ll pull out of here and go north about three miles—“ “what the hell are you saying to me”
gets to the airport five hours before the plane takes off (it’s a private plane, it’s not leaving without him)
this is more of a mom thing, but he gasps like he’s just been stabbed when someone wakes him up
*whispering* “B…B…Bruce” “HEUEUH. What.”
Texts “Call me now.” and when the kids do, assuming something horrible has happened, he’s like “what should we eat for dinner tonight.”
on the other hand, he also forgets to tell the kids very important information
“how’s it going, B?” “not much just recovering from my wrist surgery last week” “your WHAT?!”
(that just happened to me. thanks dad)
