I See Myself

I see myself

in her

and him

his twisted thoughts

her wanted whims

I see myself

in craving

and criticizing

his judgemental smile

her grin of beguile

I see myself

when I don’t want to

recognize this strife

I feign to forget

these hearts

created mine

maybe in another life

I’ll grant myself the grace

to see myself

as a story not so foreign

one that’s truly mine

A young teens questions and a young adults revisions

“I restore myself when I’m alone.”

— Marilyn Monroe

I can feel my heart beat

in my chest.

As though

despite the blood flow,

my mind detects

unrest.

We’re always moving

spinning on an axis

time fading into tiny facets

it all passes too quickly

to fathom.

I can’t keep up.

To be a woman

is to change

constantly.

Raised to know your name

is temporary

and your home is fleeting.

When I was little

I envied my brother

our last name was forever his.

Our family line

is one and the same

and yet I will be

some forgotten member

of the family tree.

I struggled to accept

my storyline would soon enough

be lost in time.

To be a woman

is to bid farewell

to multiple versions

of yourself.

- fleeting thoughts 9/26/24

“Solitude is dangerous. It’s very addictive. It becomes a habit after you realize how peaceful and calm it is. It’s like you don’t want to deal with people anymore because they drain your energy.”

— Jim Carrey