It's A Full Moon Tomorrow, You Know What That Means!? Get Ready To Howl At That Beautiful B!tch

it's a full moon tomorrow, you know what that means!? get ready to howl at that beautiful b!tch

One of the baristas at a nearby Starbucks makes me lose my mind every time I’m working there by saying things that are not outside the spectrum of normal human words but are just slightly off-the-wall.

Barista: Welcome to Starbucks, home of delicious, what deliciousness can I put in motion for you today?

Customer: … Can I get a trenta pink drink please?

Barista: Go big or go home, we here at Starbucks appreciate your commitment, what else can I get started for you?

***

Customer: Nitro cold brew with shots of espresso please.

Barista: Brave of you to commit to staying awake for three days, anything else today?

***

Barista: *slams open drive-thru window* HI HOW ARE YOU?

Customer: …I’m pretty good.

Barista: Are you ready to be even better? Because you’re about to be. *hands them their coffee* 

***

Barista, realizing that a drink was made wrong: *slams open window* SO how do you feel about surprises?

Customer: ….they’re okay.

Barista: Great because I’m about to give you one.

***

Barista: You have two drinks so I am going to hand you two straws which means, FANTASTIC news, these straws double as drumsticks. / You have one drink so I am going to hand you one straw and, promise not to tell anyone, this straw doubles as a magic wand.

***

Barista: Here are those cake pops, I plucked them fresh from the tree myself.

***

Barista: *slams open window, holding drink* Amazing, fantastic, delicious, you are a very lucky man/woman!

***

Barista, realizing drink is being delayed or remade: Looks like it’s gonna be just one minute so they have time to put the extra love in.

***

Barista: I’ll be with you in one hot second. *beat* WOW that second sure was hot!

Anyway she has a few dozen catchphrases she rotates appropriately and it’s both distracting and fantastic to listen.

I reblogged this like a year ago but it's back on my dash so here y'all go again

Farewell online privacy

Tumblr,

Earlier today we announced to the press that we are running a beta test program for Post+, Tumblr’s newest add-on subscription tool. Post+ is a completely optional tool that will allow creators to make some of their posts exclusive to their paid subscribers. You can read more about it right over here on our @postplus Tumblr. This feature is being tested by a small group of incredible creators on Tumblr.

We want to hear about what you like, what you love, and what concerns you. Even if it’s not very nice. Tell us. We can take it. We WANT that feedback. It helps us make Tumblr better.

What we won’t ever accept is the targeted harassment and threats these creators have endured since this afternoon. These creators are some of the most talented people around, and all they’re doing is testing out a feature. These are the people who graciously agreed to pilot a program to help us discover bugs before we open it up to all creators. These are the humans who are testing a feature that we hope will soon help thousands of Tumblr creators feel empowered, get rewarded for their efforts, and find support within their community.

Our Community Guidelines are clear: Don’t engage in targeted abuse, bullying, or harassment.

Anyone in violation of these guidelines will be dealt with swiftly and will be forced to contend with the appropriate consequences. It’s okay to tell us how you feel. It’s not okay to bully someone because you disagree with their choices.

I’ll never not be amused by the fact that I can drop the words “crucifix nail nipples” into a conversation and some of you who have been with me since the livejournal days will join me in the flashbacks, screaming and crying all the way.