Hi, I Saw Your Post And Wanted To Tell You That Im Excited For The Following Chapter Of Reliability!

hi, i saw your post and wanted to tell you that i’m excited for the following chapter of reliability!

i also want to send you a virtual hug after what you said about adult life and being too tired to write, i understand completely... i hope you can relax soon and be able to find time for yourself in this very overwhelming world 🥺🤍

in the best way, i love this fic... i’m so thankful for your brain for writing it and sharing it! (and please never ever feel pressed to write, take your time!!)

juliette, hiii 🥺 first of all, let me hug you right back bc this is such a lovely message! i’m smiling so big right now

thank you for being excited and loving reliability as much as i do. it’s so fun and rewarding to write knowing amazing ppl such as yourself will read it

your kind words and support will never go unnoticed or unappreciated. please stay healthy and safe! don’t be a stranger, let’s keep in touch

xx

masterlist

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

ON GOING⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

↳ snowed in chapters: 06/10 pairing: jimin x reader genre: fluff, romance tags: single dad!jimin, journalist!reader, strangers to lovers

thanks to your dog you met the cute but guarded neighbor. thanks to a snowstorm you discovered he could be much more than that. would the two of you be ready for new beginnings, even if your pasts left deep scars?

alternatively: how you and park jimin fell in love by christmas

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

COMPLETED

↳ dear soulmate word count: 3.614 pairing: namjoon x reader genre: romance, fluff tags: soulmate!au, idol!namjoon, strangers to lovers

once a year, the system assigns soulmates according to the sincerity of their submission letters. ready to have your lives completely changed, namjoon and you sign up for the program, receiving on the first week of january the highly anticipated green envelope with each other’s message

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

↳ like no other [+18] word count: 6.937 pairing: taehyung x reader genre: smut tags: exes!au, shameless smut, big dick!taehyung, possessive!taehyung

great chemistry is an extreme waste when people are terrible at communication and feelings

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

↳ the dinner [+18] word count: 1.888 pairing: namjoon x reader genre: smut tags: slice of life!au, shameless smut, boyfriend!namjoon

the thought of having Namjoon fuck me hard while everyone else was downstairs, and could look up at any time and catch both of us, had my pussy throbbing.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ↳ hangsang word count: 1.268 pairing: yoongi x reader genre: light angst, fluff tags: slice of life!au, established relationship, musician!yoongi, boyfriend!yoongi

on a particular difficult day, while feeling at your absolute lowest, you confess to yoongi he would be better off without you

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

↳ reliability chapters: 10 | word count: 31.424 pairing: taehyung x reader genre: light angst, drama tags: ceo!taehyung, enemies to friends to lovers

a predictable mistake in buying shares becomes the perfect opportunity for taehyung to show everybody in the company no one is above his rules. what he didn't know was that his plan would backfire making him question what the real meaning of trust is

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

DRABBLES

#24 namjoon x reader || action, fantasy || 493 words

#35 taehyung x reader || romance, fluff || 599 words

#54 seokjin x reader || angst || 806 words

#89 yoongi x reader || angst || 1.301 words (oops?)

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

WORKING ON

↳ chaptered the messers (become the messies) ∙ yoongi x reader

↳ one shots reality or illusion ∙ jungkook x reader selfless ∙ namjoon x reader how much love (how much joy) ∙ hoseok x reader

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

SOON

↳ short stories last night ∙ namjoon x reader back to you∙ jin x reader unexpectedly ∙ yoongi x reader aligned ∙ hoseok x reader the lake ∙ jimin x reader next to you ∙ taehyung x reader everything & everywhere ∙ jungkook x reader

↳ series dangerously in love ∙ bts mafia!au

↳ chaptered one for the laugh, two for the show ∙ jin x reader

01. hide and seek | snowed in • pjm

index | next

pairing: jimin x reader word count: 1.349 genre: fluff, romance rating: pg15 warnings: none au: single parents trope: neighbours to lovers tags: single dad!jimin, journalist!reader crosspost: ao3

summary: thanks to your dog you met the cute but guarded neighbor. thanks to a snowstorm you discovered he could be much more than that. would the two of you be ready for new beginnings, even if your pasts left deep scars?

alternatively: how you and park jimin fell in love by christmas

A/N: this is my very first attempt to write fluff and i’m super excited! i’m really into hallmark movies and cheesy romantic comedies so i hope it’s light and fun, and you have a great time reading it. thanks for being here <3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

“Eighteen, nineteen, twenty! Ready or not, here I go” Jimin turned from the wall and scanned the place. He moved quietly through the living room, looking over every corner and possible hiding spot. Nothing.

“Where are you? I’m gonna find you” he said in a sing-song voice.

The apartment where Jimin lived was a medium-size loft with high ceilings, big windows, and an open concept. There weren't that many corners to hide, especially in the kitchen with a big island in the middle so he moved his search to the bedrooms.

"Jia" he called, feeling desperation build up in the pit of his stomach, "Jia?" he repeated again, louder now. She wasn't in her bedroom or in his suite.

"Jia, you can come out now, sweetie…” Jimin was trying to stay calm, but as he entered the bathroom he saw it was also empty. With two big strides, he reached the bathtub and pushed the shower curtain. Nothing. She was gone.

This has never happened before and fear took over every fiber in Jimin's body, making him start to shake and his eyes burn with tears threatening to escape. He immediately ran across the apartament to get the car key. She might have left without him noticing and headed for the street. What if she wasn't on the street? What if somebody took her? God, he would have to go to the police!

“No no, no police, calm down Jimin!” he mumbled to himself.

Jimin left his apartment and started shouting for Jia as he walked through the building's corridors. The silence was excruciating.

“Jia, where are you?” he cried out now totally desperate and with tears streaming down his cheeks.

He felt so helpless and unbelievably guilty. How did he let that happen? He was always so careful. You have to keep your eyes on kids at all times, what the hell was he thinking? And he didn't even check beforehand to see if the door was locked? Idiot!

As he reached the front door of the building, he saw a tiny figure wearing cute pigtails and a pink tutu right in front of the stairs, crouched down petting a dog. He took a deep breath and wiped away the tears, a wave of relief starting to settle him down. Once he collected himself, he opened the glass door with a strong pull, running towards the girl.

“Oh my god, Jia!”

“Hi daddy!” the girl smiled like nothing happened and this was a casual conversation, eyes making a crescent moon shape, just like her father’s on happier occasions where he hadn’t just taken the biggest scare of his life.

Still feeling a bit overwhelmed he kneeled and enveloped her in a tight hug for a few seconds. “Jia, we agreed that we were going to play inside, what are you doing here?” he asked as he pulled away to look the little girl right in the eye and caress her little cheeks.

“I’m sorry, daddy, I wanted to play with the doggie” she shyly replied feeling suddenly sad. Jimin didn’t sound mad but she felt as if he was.

“Hello, I'm sorry. I didn't know she sneaked out” a stranger intervened.

Jimin finally realized there was someone else present. He stood up, taking Jia's and giving the strange woman a scornful look.

“Since when does a small child wander around by herself?”

The woman was speechless, completely shocked, and not knowing how to reply because she was sure he would thank her for looking after the girl until an adult or parental figure arrived, however, her good deed was found with contempt.

She wished to explain what happened, especially the part that she wasn't a crazy child thief but it was best to leave him be. He was visibly altered and wouldn't think logically. She didn't expect him to.

Still, she felt somewhat embarrassed by the tone he used and decided to just leave. “Come on, Bo” she said, pulling the dog by the collar and giving Jia an apologetic smile before entering the building.

“Bye doggie!” the girl waved.

“Jia, you scared me. Please don't do this again!” Jimin bent over with a soft but worried expression, “It's very dangerous to be out here without an adult, okay?” he explained and kissed his daughter's forehead.

“Okay…” she nodded.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞ ∞

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Later that night, while Y/N was making dinner, she recalled the morning incident and went over a bunch of possible things she could have said instead of I'm sorry. I didn't know she sneaked out. It sounded super dumb now that she thought about it, no wonder the guy replied like that.

Bo barked.

“I know!” she stirred the meat in the pan, “So obvious but it all happened so fast”

Bo barked again, wagging his tail. Y/N thought he was trying to be part of the conversation but the dog was just really hungry and the smell that permeated the kitchen was driving him nuts.

“One minute we were getting out of the car, the next she was right in front of me scrubbing your belly” she looked down at Bo, “I didn’t even see where she came from!”

Bo jumped on Y/N legs trying to get closer to the stove.

“You are not listening, are you?” she sighed amused, “Okay, fine, I’m gonna feed you”.

While Y/N waited for the meat to grill a little more she grabbed Bo's food from the cupboard under the kitchen island and put it in his bowl by the door. He definitely wasn't going to pay attention to her until he ate. Hungry furball!

In the unit next door Bo was also the topic of conversation.

“Daddy, I want to play with the lady’s dog” Jia announced with a serious look on her face.

Jimin was cutting some vegetables on the kitchen table while she was coloring a drawing in the middle of the living room floor and he thought the bossy tone she used was very amusing as if she were letting him know what she was going to do instead of asking for his permission. Exactly like her mom.

“What?”

“Please? He’s really cute!” she got up to look directly at him with a pout.

“What dog?” he asked confused, not even remembering the interaction, “What lady?”

“Today! When we were playing hide and seek.”

Flashes came to Jimin's mind and he quickly remembered the woman who owned the dog and how he cut her off. He said something about kids not walking around by themselves? What was it again? He couldn't remember but it was not nice at all. Amidst the rush of emotions he felt in less than ten minutes, her presence was not registered properly and now he regretted not even saying ‘thank you’.

“Oh…” was all he managed to say.

Jia came running and stopped in front of the table, both hands together, absolutely desperate, “Can I? Please? Pretty pleeeeease?”

Her big eyes made Jimin melt on the inside. How could he say no to that face? And it wasn’t like she was asking to go out on a date, she just wanted to play with the dog. Yikes, dating. She was almost 5 but he knew time would fly pretty quickly and soon enough she would be 16 and getting into high school.

“I'll ask the lady tomorrow, okay? Right now it’s time for dinner!”

Jia looked at the vegetables on the cutting board and gave her dad a side-eye, "I'm not hungry" and put both of her hands behind her back as she rocked back and forth.

“Jia, we already talked about this, remember? You need to eat your greens. You are a big girl now!”

"I'm not that big" she raised an arm and stood on her tippy toes.

"Oh no? Too bad," Jimin shrugged and he kept slicing, "babies can't play with dogs. They might get hurt”

“No, no, wait! I’m a big girl” she quickly corrected, making Jimin burst out a laugh.

"That's what I thought"

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 ❤ 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗺𝗲 𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝘆 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝘀𝗸! 𝗶 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆⠀

03. a little honesty never killed anyone | reliability • kth

previous | index | next

pairing: taehyung x reader word count: 1.671 genre: drama, light angst rating: pg-13 warnings: cursing, sensual innuendos au: ceo/office trope: enemies to friends to lovers tags: ceo!taehyung, office!au, best friend!yoongi, unresolved emotional tension, mutual pining, slow burn crosspost: ao3

summary: continuing exactly where we left off in the last chapter, now it's time to check out how Y/N's interview went

A/N: i love writing this series! i really do. i have so much fun coming up the dialogues and even though sometimes is hard to set the scene how i want to, i’m proud of how it came out. hope you like it <3

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

10 years before

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

“Excuse me?” I blinked twice. Did I get it right? Did she just say what I thought she said? Who answers a polite greeting like that? Doesn't make sense. I said ‘Hello, long time no see’ and she immediately mocks me for it? Where are we? 5th grade?

“You are very predictable” she reiterated more slowly as if she were talking to someone old and deaf. Y/N was definitely fucking with me and I decided to indulge in her little game just to see how far it would actually go.

“Really?” I mocked, coming around the table, walking towards her, and pointing to the couch.

“Come on, did you really think I wouldn't know that you were going to do the interview?” Y/N sat down and stared at me.

“Why would I withhold this information?” I sat next to her and crossed my legs, resting my hands on my lap.

“For many reasons” she said.

Y/N looked so sure of herself. Scratch that, so full of herself. Since college, she has always had this ‘know it all’ attitude and was absurdly irritating. Some might even call it tenacity, but I wasn't so sure because from the tone she used and even her body language, in my opinion, everything screamed: insecurity. That's right, she is insecure. There is no other reason why a person would want to reassert herself all the time by claiming to have every answer in the universe other than trying to prove something.

However, for recreational purposes, I will continue to comply.

“Such as?”

Y/N leaned forward a little, speaking in a lower tone as if she were about to tell me a secret, “The main one?”

“Sure” I imitated her gesture, getting close to her face but not enough that neither of us would be uncomfortable with.

“I wouldn't come” she returned to the previous position, leaving me leaning in the middle of the couch.

“But you did” I raised my eyebrows.

“I said you were the predictable one, not me” Y/N smiled and paused so I could absorb the words, “This is a great opportunity. It would be stupid to refuse for the simple fact that we don't like each other”

“Ouch!" I leaned back with both hands on my chest, receiving the metaphorical shot, “Blunt and straight to the point”

I honestly don't know if this hurts my pride a little bit or if it delights me.

“It's the way I like to do things” Y/N shrugged. “So, shall we start?”

“Who is conducting the interview? Me or you?”

Y/N laughed looking down. I couldn't decipher if she was embarrassed that I called her out or if it was just her way of laughing. The times she technically laughed at me back in college were in a sarcastic tone and now her intention seemed different. Maybe I'm funny, I don't know.

“Do you want anything to drink?” I offered while filling a glass of water with the jar my secretary had brought minutes before.

“No, thank you” she replied, watching me drink.

“We haven't seen each other for a long time. How are you, Y/N?” I asked, putting the glass back on the coffee table and taking my folder with a notepad, her resume, and some other papers.

“Good” she said. For a brief moment, I felt some sort of hesitation as if maybe it was a lie, “I just got back from England, I think you saw the MBA on my resume” Y/N pointed at the folder in my hands.

“Impressive. Congratulations” I replied without taking my eyes off the paper in a neutral and completely impassive tone. If that was her attempt to impress me, it didn't work.

“Now I'm looking for a place where I can practice everything I learned” Y/N continued.

“And you think Vante is that place?” I closed the folder and gave her a confused look.

“It could be” she mused.

“I don't get it. I thought this was a ‘big opportunity’ for you” I argued, placing the folder on the coffee table and crossing my arms. This woman confuses me sometimes. She says one thing but does the complete opposite, then she's utterly mysterious, and other times she goes straight to the point.

“And it is. Vante is one of the largest companies in the country and being able to be part of its history would certainly be a milestone in my career” Y/N looked at me sternly.

“But?” I asked.

“My decision depends on confirming who, in fact, is in control of it” she replied.

Who does Y/N think she is? That's hilarious.

“Decision? There's not even a proposal..." I scoffed.

Y/N paused for a moment relishing my words. She was in control of the conversation and knew it. Unconsciously, me too, but I didn't want to admit it. After a few seconds she simply stated, “Yes, there is, Mr. Kim, because I am the best person for the job”

She wants to play? No problem. I love games.

“Let's say the person in control is me” I conceded.

“Then I would accept”

“Really?”

“You are intelligent, obstinate, and responsible, as well as result-oriented but in a bold way” Y/N replied with complete honesty and, again, bluntly. It was impossible to predict what was going in her head, let alone anticipate any kind of response. In chess, every move has a purpose and I was trying to find out hers.

“Bold?” I disputed with humor this adjective that sounded very strange and did not match me at all.

“Yes, you are not scared to take a risk” she quickly answered as she leaned over to the coffee table and seized a glass of water for herself, “I saw you go against all odds several times, convinced that things would work out” she paused to take a sip before continuing, “and they did” she raised her glass as if she was to make a toast.

Okay, well, perhaps it does match me.

“And here I was thinking you didn't like me” I stated, unable to contain the big smile forming on my face. The ego massage masked some of my embarrassment.

“You and I have more in common than you think” she noted “In my opinion, working alongside someone so similar, yet completely different, is stimulating and only adds to the business. Don't you agree?” she tilted her head with lips pursed in a single line.

Y/N had a good point. Right then I saw an opportunity to take advantage of her initiative because one thing was certain in life: if you wait for somebody else to make a decision for you, they will, and you won't like the result.

“Maybe you’re not the person I remembered” I noted in a tone that I hoped was friendly enough but at the same time didn’t over-implicate my curiosity (which at this point was about to explode) and my desire to win the psychological game of chess (which also increased exponentially by the minutes of this interview).

“Probably. A lot has happened in three years” she crossed her legs and held her knees with her hands clasped.

Damn Y/N. She knew what to say and how to speak to test my limits. What 'things' happened? And was it really time to shift positions? Really? With that dress? Rude.

Lost in my thoughts I ended up being quiet long enough for her to just get up and say, “I'm gonna get going"

“But the interview is not over” I said confused, looking at my watch and then up, finding Y/N's sarcastic smile, the one I was deeply familiar with.

“It is” she replied, reaching down and grabbing her purse from the couch “You already saw that I changed enough to be part of your team but not so much that you will doubt my choices. Like it or not, deep down you trust my character and judgment” she looked me up and down and continued “In fact, I think you had already made your decision before I even walked into your office. You needed to see for yourself that I want this job as much as you want to hire me”

While what Y/N had just said was pretty unbelievable, I expected no less from her. Even though our lives have changed in the last few years, her essence has remained the same and I was happy to have scheduled this interview. She’s still opinionated but in a calmer and more analytical way, just as her letters of recommendation suggested.

“Isn't it tiring having this amount of self-esteem?” I teased.

“Not when you're right” Y/N shrugged.

“Guess some things don't change after all” I grinned, standing up and pointing to the door.

Y/N started walking towards it and even though I couldn't see her face when she replied laughing “I bet this is one of the things you hate about me”, I was sure it was a genuine laugh. Oh yes, I am funny.

“We are not close enough for this to be true” I leaned against the doorframe, “And 'hate' is a very strong word” I shook my head.

“I suppose so” she looked up, pondering my statement for a couple of seconds. “We'll find out in the next few months” Y/N shifted her gaze to me in an intense way before heading towards the office lobby to take the elevator.

Just like in chess, in life, we can't jump to conclusions, and if I were to have Y/N by my side as operations manager, I would have to let go of the impression I have of her. 

Replaying our conversation in my head as I went back into my office and closed the door, I leaned against it for a brief moment not knowing what exactly had changed in our dynamics but feeling for the first time in a long time that I was no longer alone.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 ❤ 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗺𝗲 𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝘆 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝘀𝗸! 𝗶 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ revised version: 09.25.2021

WHAT !!!WHY... he just realized it.. a little late

well, in ofc’s mind it wasn’t a little and she felt like she needed to move on. the things is though: is tae gonna do something to change her mind? is he ready to tell her how he feels?

07. a double-edged sword | reliability • kth

previous | index | next

pairing: taehyung x reader word count: 4.738 genre: drama, light angst rating: pg-13 warnings: cursing au: ceo/office trope: enemies to friends to lovers tags: ceo!taehyung, office!au, best friend!yoongi, unresolved emotional tension, mutual pining, slow burn crosspost: ao3

summary: over the course of a month, tae is forced to face his feelings in order to fix things with Y/N. but will he be able to? she has some news.

A/N: a double-edged sword: a situation or course of action having both positive and negative effects. in this particular chapter i wanted to show that even when you have the best intentions at heart, things might take an inexpected turn and get you back to square one

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

≡ 24 hours later ≡

 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

Saturday. 11pm. I was trying so hard to fell asleep but my stupid and stubborn brain only knew how to repeat Y/N, Y/N, Y/N, over and over and over and over again — it was driving me nuts.

Yoon Gi helped. He truly did. I felt so much better after talking to him but to be completely honest he stirred some shit inside me too and I wasn't sure how productive the next few days were going to be. If I can't sleep, how am I supposed to focus on work? Y/N may have quit but I was still CEO and had a lot of people depending on me.

In the dark, the light beams that came in through the bedroom window made shadows with interesting shapes and I stared at the ceiling as if it was going to give me the answers I needed.

I took a deep breath.

They say there are 5 stages to grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. I already went through 3 but out of order. Does that count?

At first, I tried to bargain with Y/N. No success there. Then I went to straight denial as Yoon Gi casually pointed out how dumb and blind I have been. Now I'm getting depressed because I don't really see a way out of this. Y/N is gone.

Another deep breath.

Maybe I should go make ramen.

In the kitchen, while setting everything up, I went over different conversations I had with Y/N over the years, looking for any hint that my subconscious could have given me that I genuinely liked her. It was still weird to talk about it so openly, even in my own head. Bringing to consciousness something that was asleep, for whatever reason, was uncomfortable.

I'm not sure why I made a point of burying the possibility inside me. Maybe because I believed she hated me (but if she hated you so much, why did she go to work for you?), maybe because I thought she didn't have time for a relationship (she didn't have time because you loaded her with work, idiot) or it was because I was simply afraid (this seems like the most logical option, congratulations). The dialogue with myself went on for a while until the ramen was just the way I like it and I ate out of the pan sitting at the dinner table.

What do I really feel for her?

Is it attraction? Admiration? Lust?

What do I like about her?

If I text Yoon Gi right now will he block me? Probably.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

≡ 1 week later ≡

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You have been quiet since you got here, honey. Did something happen?” my mom asked as she calmly sliced her steak. Joining us at the table were my father, my brother, and his fiancee Hyun Jae.

“Don't tell me you lost the exclusivity deal with that Australian company” my dad sipped some of his wine while my mom gave an elusive nudge with her elbow making him almost spit his drink.

“No dad, I renewed the deal” I replied.

“So what happened?” my mom insisted, more concerned now, even making Ye Jun lookup.

“Nothing, nothing” I reaffirmed with a (fake) smile making her smile too. “Tell me about the wedding, Jun. Have you guys set the date yet?” I pointed the knife at my brother and my future sister-in-law.

“September 15th” Hyun Jae nodded sheepishly.

“Excellent! I will ask Eun Ae to block my schedule"

“Thank you, Tae” Ye Jun smiled.

“It will be here in Seoul, a classic but intimate ceremony. We are not going to invite many people, just the dearest ones” Hyun Jae explained. “Are you bringing someone?”

I think she must have asked the question that everyone there wanted to ask because the three heads immediately turned to me. My mom because she was curious, my father because he was surprised, and my brother because of Hyun Jae's boldness. Now it was his turn to nudge her with his elbow.

“You can bring someone, or not, it’s fine, we don't care” she laughed embarrassed. “I mean, we do care, you are very important, we are family…” she immediately corrected herself.

“Baby, I think he got it” Ye Jun put his hand on top of Hyun Jae's, making her stop and breathe. It was actually funny the way she blushed. My brother, poor guy, head over heels for her, admired every tiny detail on her face. They deserve each other.

“You should bring Y/N” my mom commented with a smirk as if she had said the most brilliant thing ever.

My dad looked at her a little surprised, “She's a good girl, but wouldn't she give the wrong impression?”

I didn't even have time to say anything, because my mom already intervened as if Y/N was her own daughter, “What do you mean wrong?”

“No, not like that” said my father, “She works at Vante, she is not Tae Hyung's girlfriend. People gossip, you know Soo Jin?”

“And what do you know about gossip, anyway?” my mom narrowed her eyes.

“I'm right here, guys” I remarked, “Doesn't my opinion count?”

“Right” my dad rolled his eyes at my mom and turned to me, “What do you think? Would she accept the invitation even though she only has a professional relationship with you?”

“Maybe, I'll have to ask her” I took another bite of my food. With my mouth full I can't spill out that Y/N no longer works at Vante. My father would kill me.

* * * *⠀

As I'm walking to the front door to grab my jacket and car keys after I said goodbye to my family, I hear footsteps approaching behind me. To no surprise at all, it was my mother.

“You used to stay longer, you know?” she stood beside me, snuggling to her beautiful peach cardigan. Her cheekbones had a light shade of pink and her hair was up in a ponytail. She looked so young.

“I'm sorry mom, I really have to go”

“But it's Sunday” she pouted, hugging my right arm and stopping me from putting the other side of the jacket on.

My mom had this adorable side that came out every once in a while, whenever she needed some attention. Didn't happen much, but at the same time, it made my heart grow bigger. It also made me a little bit sad too since I knew it was because she was feeling either sad or lonely.

“Yeah, I know, I wish I could but there's a lot to be done at the company and I have to prepare for a big meeting tomorrow” I (white) lied since I'm embarrassed about the actual reason why. A part of that statement was true though.

“I know that excuse all too well” my mom side-eyed me, letting go of my arm, “Your dad used to say it quite a lot”

More and more I see traits of my dad in me and I hate it. I swore from the beginning that I was going to be different. Better. Look at me treating my mom the same way he did for so many years. I'm pathetic.

“Can't you ask Y/N to help you or handle the meeting? Just this once” she pleaded, watching me put the car keys in the jacket’s front pocket, “Your brother's wedding it's in 6 weeks and I need to discuss some things with you before"

“Uh…” I paused for a second. I should have seen this question coming. “Y/N is very busy too” I shrugged nonchalantly.

My mom furrowed her eyebrows.

“Let me check my schedule” I quickly intervened, holding her by the shoulders, trying to change the subject, “I think I can come to dinner next Friday and we’ll talk about the wedding”

“Fine” she sighed in defeat.

I gave her a big box smile and a kiss on the forehead, “Okay, I gotta go now, mom”

As I was reaching for the doorknob she said, “Wait, just one more thing”

“Yeah?” I turned around.

She looked me dead in the eyes, cute attitude long gone. “Apologize to Y/N”

“W-what?” I stammered in shock.

“I don't know what you did, but just apologize” she pointed her finger at me as if I was five years old and just did something naughty.

“How did you…” I avoided her stare, letting out a nervous laugh.

“Whenever we asked about her you gave evasive answers” she said just before poking me in the chest, “And I know you"

This was my problem and I didn’t want my mom worrying about it. She had a tendency to want to solve everything for everyone and I suspect she would also like me to date Y/N. To this day, I don't know what her real intention was in insisting on hiring Y/N, but something tells me that it was love at first sight for my mother — unlike me, which was not even on the 8790th sight. If my mother could have chosen to have a daughter, I’m sure she would describe Y/N head to toe, flaws and all.

“Thanks mom but I'll find a way to fix it” I replied with a faint smile, barely holding it together. If she only knew how I was feeling inside.

“Oh, I know that, you always do” she gave me a wink, “Just remember to speak from the heart” and rubbed my chest.

“I did that. Didn't work"

“Are you sure?” she squinted her eyes.

“What do you mean? Of course!” I pulled away.

“Tae Hyung, you have a terrible way to communicate your feelings” she looked back at the living room making sure no one was close by to listen to the next part as she whispered, “and that's on me and your dad" I laughed and she returned to normal volume, “So I highly doubt you knew what you were doing”

“I asked her to stay, that I needed her there”

“Wait, why?” she grabbed my arm again and led me towards the door.

“She quit” I whispered as we crossed the threshold.

“What?” my mom shouted.

“Shh!!” I said while closing the door behind us and pulling her close to me as we walked to the driveway, “Yes, I fucked up really bad mom, but I know that if I can just talk to her one more time I'll convince her to change her mind”

“Where is she now?” my mom asked, lowering the hand that was over her mouth.

There’s no more hiding, I guess. I need to come clean.

“I don't know"

“Good God, Tae Hyung” she slapped my arm, “How in the world did you manage to lose your most devoted and talented employee?”

“By being an asshole” I confessed.

She rolled her eyes, “Lovely”

The moment we approach my car I suddenly turn around, desperation fully displayed on my face, “Can you just please keep this a secret? I'll figure something out, just don't tell dad yet”

My mom pondered for a few seconds. Not if she was going to tell my dad or not, because I knew she wouldn't do it, but what to say to me next. I could see in her eyes how worried she was and how badly she wanted to offer me some kind of solution (the family's problem solver, remember?). Instead, she just used the old-fashioned threat, “You better!”

“Now I really have to go” I gave her a hug. “I love you”

“I love you too” she squeezed me a bit tighter before taking a step back and cupping my face, “And remember: be honest. With her, and with yourself”

“I will…” I nodded, promising myself that as difficult as it was, I would try. My mom was right and that was good advice.

“And stop being an asshole” she moved her hands from my cheeks and rested them on my shoulders.

That was also another good piece of advice, although more difficult to execute, so I just laughed, “I will”

 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

≡ 1 month later ≡

 ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Right after I got out of the shower, while still drying my hair, I noticed my phone light up and vibrate over the sink. It took me a few seconds to register the name that appeared in large letters at the top: Y/N. I threw the towel away and picked up the device as fast as I could, almost dropping it on the floor. Desperate was an understatement.

“Hello?” I answered.

“Are you at home?” she asked, which I immediately replied with a grunt which made her continue, “Can I come in? We need to talk”

The tone in Y/N's voice was serious but didn’t show anger as I thought it would; not like that day on the emergency staircase, at least. I ran over to the intercom and saw her on the camera. The request was surprising, the time even more so. It wasn't like her to show up here at my house, so whatever she had to talk about it must be urgent. Okay, Y/N was the topic of conversation, but something stirred inside me and I started to feel restless.

“Sure” I replied, pressing the button that opened the gate and ending the call right away.

She caught me so off guard and I didn't even have time to put clothes on! I was still in my bathrobe. Damn, this doesn't seem appropriate. As soon as I heard the front door open, I ran into the bedroom and put on the first outfit I saw, a set of black sweats.

Back in the living room, Y/N was sitting on the couch with her elbows resting on her thighs and her chin in her hands, swinging back and forth. Was she nervous or just bored?

“Ah, hello!” I coughed first to announce my presence, “Sorry, I just got out of the shower”

“That’s okay” she straightened up and smiled, watching me walk around the couch and sit, “I should have given you a heads up before coming and not simply show up at your doorstep”

“You are always welcome” I adjusted the glasses on the bridge of my nose, still unsure of what to say next and somewhat afraid of what she had to tell me, “Did something happen?”

Y/N took a deep breath.

Oh-oh, that doesn't sound good.

“Over the past few weeks, I thought a lot about what happened, about the things I said and, especially about the things I didn't say” she looked away, now staring at the tv on the wall in front of us. “Do you remember that acquisition in Hong Kong?”

It took me a few seconds to pinpoint the memory but I smiled when I did, “Sure, it was your first international purchase”

That day Y/N was so happy and I remember thinking ‘It's just another purchase, why is she smiling so much?’, without even considering how meaningful it must have been for her.

“Yes, but what I remember most vividly about that day was the way you treated me” her gaze now returned to me, nostalgic and a kind of sad, “I felt invincible because you believed that I could be invincible” she smiled without showing her teeth as if the memory itself was a little painful to talk about.

“I thought you knew” I replied frowning, “You always acted like you were” I chuckled and Y/N blushed.

“Apparently, we never properly recognized how alike we are and how we have influenced each other over the years, have we?” she asked.

I thought about it for a moment, “Yeah, I guess you’re right”

“Everything has always been so implicit” she nodded, “At least for me…”

“Of course, for me too. I was never big on words, you know that” I agreed.

“Maybe that was our mistake too” she observed, suddenly making me understand exactly what this conversation was about. Watching my reaction closely, she continued, “You know what I'm talking about, don't you?”

I knew, of course I did, but it is so difficult to say it out loud.

“My inability to say thank you?” I teased, trying to be funny, too much of a coward to keep going. Why am I like this? Why do I have to make things more complicated? It's so simple. She is so simple.

“I was talking about how we both took each other's trust for granted and ended up abusing certain situations, thinking it would be okay and just brushing them off when in fact the chance of us getting hurt and feeling betrayed was pretty big” Y/N shrugged, “but sure, you can be really ungrateful”

Shit.

I must have spent a lot of time staring at my feet, searching for the right words, because she took advantage of my silence to keep talking.

“Precisely because I knew you trusted me so much, it didn't even cross my mind to consult you on such a small acquisition and, at that time, very insignificant and disconnected of Min Industries, because I had done it before” she paused and glanced back at me just to make sure that I was following along. “You, on the other hand, thought that I would stay, even after I was humiliated and hurt because that wasn’t the first time that we disagreed on something and you put on a little show”

Yup, she called me on my bullshit. I really took our relationship for granted. When I think of the selfish way in which I made certain decisions or how I treated her, it almost seems like an out-of-body experience. It is as if I look at myself and couldn’t recognize the person in front of me.

“My mistake was to assume that you knew and respected me enough not to use me as a pawn in a pathetic power scheme” Y/N continued, now with a little more urgency in her voice, “And yours was that I was going to tolerate this behavior forever and quietly; a bit submissively too”

She got up and started pacing around the room, “I should have told you that your attitude bothered me but I was busy and naively waiting for that Hong Kong Tae Hyung to appear. The one who was kind, empathetic, and also funny” she seemed lost in thought but not for long. She then regained focus and asked me with bitterness in her voice, “I wanted to be your friend, wasn’t it obvious?”

“No, quite the opposite” I snapped.

“Since college”

“What?” I widened my eyes, “You ignored me in college"

“Because in the few interactions we had, you always found a way to criticize me”

“Wait, you criticized me” I said, getting up and pointing a finger at Y/N.

She watched me do this and pointed her finger back, stammering a little bit, “I-I did it because you did it first”

“I'm so confused…” I massaged my temples as I walked towards the kitchen. Water, I need water.

Y/N was right behind me. She stopped in front of the island and watched me open the fridge. “You really have no idea what's going on around you, do you? Always oblivious”

“I don’t do it on purpose, Y/N” I justified, slamming the door and opening the bottle of water. My voice came out a little harsh because of the mocking tone she had used before — I couldn't help it, this is how we communicate. She noticed.

“But it doesn't hurt any less because of it” she whispered, lowering her head and staring at the counter.

Even after I realized my reaction was exaggerated and being completely aware that this was the whole point of the conversation, I couldn't hold back the following words and kind of shouted, “Is that what you wanted to tell me? At this hour of the night? That I’m a bad person? Thanks, I got the memo”

Y/N took a deep breath, “I'll let this one slide”

Does she want to lay all the cards on the table? Great, let’s do it.

“You know what?” I started, taking a quick sip of water and closing the bottle, “I've been waiting to hear from you for over a month. I was desperate thinking that something had happened. Now you show up here, late at night, with what I thought would be an explanation or at least a productive conversation, but no” I faced Y/N, my hands resting on the cold marble, fingertips gripping the edge tightly. “What do you want?”

“To tell you straight up I’m tired” she replied without any emotion in her voice, “I'm tired of your games, trying to understand your obsession with rules, sympathizing with your family problems, giving my blood sweat, and tears for Vante, acting like your work wife, giving up quality time with my family or any possibility of personal life” she shifted the weight from one leg to the other and tilted her head a little to the side, “I just wanted you to see me as worthy”

“Worthy?” I asked.

“Worthy of your time, of your friendship, and who knows, maybe something more” Y/N ended with a humorless laugh, the kind you give after hearing something absurd or a bad joke.

“Something more?” I blinked trying to assimilate the information.

Y/N rolled her eyes, “Don't try to be funny now”

“Promise I’m not” I raised both hands.

“Tae Hyung, for God's sake, the tension between us is palpable, it always has been. Can you honestly tell me you didn't feel it?” she leaned over the island and grabbed the water bottle in front of me and drank right away.

“Well, yes... I did” I scratched my head, “but you are so hard to read…”

“That's because you never bothered to get to know me. Not really” she capped the bottle and tossed it back to me, “Back in college you made sure to put up a wall between us. I don't even know you”

“What are you talking about?” I grabbed the bottle with one hand in a quick reflex, “You’re the person who knows me the best, Y/N” I pointed the bottle back at her.

“You only get that impression because we spent hours on end together, but when was the last time you told me anything personal?”

Wait, that was a valid question. When was the last time? I'm sure it wasn't that long ago. Hold on, I'll remember. It was that day... no, it was that time...

“See?” she crossed her arms, taking advantage of my inner monologue.

“We’re digressing” I walked around the kitchen, returning to the couch, “What is this worthy thing all about? Do you…” I paused as I sat down, biting my bottom lip “Do you like me?” I asked.

Y/N, still in the kitchen, laughed to herself before slapping the island's surface, “Out of everything I said, is this the part you’re focusing on?”

“Oh I'm sorry if I'm a little shocked by the ton of information you just dumped on me” I said in a sarcastic tone, getting up from the couch feeling the adrenaline running through my body, it was impossible to stay still. “It’s obvious that I had no idea that you felt so bad working at Vante, if I had known I would have done something about it. I never wanted or expected you to give up your life for me or the company, now I feel bad”

“It is what it is” she put her hands in the front pockets of the plaid maxi blazer and walked towards me.

“No, it doesn't work like that” I shook my head “It’s like you don't know the basics”

Then that's it. We reached the point of no return. With each new information Y/N revealed, more urgent was my need to make everything clear. I was scared as hell, but we had no choice. Either we talked about how we really felt or we would end our relationship for good.

“You can't come to my house and say everything you want to say and hope that I don't say anything back. The last month was a fucking nightmare for me, I replayed that night over and over in my head, dissecting all my answers and finding three new ones, because I knew I made the biggest mistake of my life” I felt like my heart was going to come out of my mouth, blood pumping in my ear, my hands were starting to sweat, “If I could go back in time, I would, but I can’t. And where were you for me to properly apologize?”

“I needed some time” she muttered.

“Yes, I understand, I don’t blame you. But now you’re here. Let's talk!”

Y/N was still standing behind the couch, her facial expression impassive, just waiting for what I was going to say next. I, on the other hand, had already taken off my glasses and moved to the front of the tv, walking back and forth in an attempt to calm down a little and choose the right set of words.

“I know I already said it, but I’m gonna say it again, I shouldn't have humiliated you in front of the shareholders, let alone questioned your trust or loyalty to me and Vante. For that and also for being an absolute jerk most of the time, I sincerely apologize”

Y/N nodded.

“It was never my intention to hurt you, drive you away, or disrespect you. You are the person I admire the most within the company. That day I saw the perfect opportunity and went for it. I thought that if I showed the shareholders that even the “boss’s favorite” didn’t have privileges, of course, they wouldn’t” I said calmly and slowly so that she had time to absorb everything.

“I am obsessed with rules because they help me find order amid chaos” I continued, “I’m terrible with surprises. I hate the feeling of helplessness that comes attached to error. My perfectionist nature limits me more than it helps and if I could change something about myself it would be that”

I walk towards Y/N, the only thing between us is the couch.

“Believe me, I didn’t make a conscious choice to use them as an obstacle to anything, including a relationship. I'm sorry for that too” I rubbed my eyes, taking a deep breath.

“About telling you things about my personal life, I honestly thought you didn't care at all” I looked up to meet her eyes, “Even before Vante, you never seemed to care about me that way” I put my hands in my sweatshirt pocket, “You mentioned the wall I put up, but you must have helped me build it because I also know very little about your life. Have you noticed that?”

Y/N was speechless. From her reaction, I could see I struck a nerve. She was too focused on pointing out my defects and forgot to recognize her own.

“Huh…” she said, narrowing her eyes after thinking for a while, “I think you’re right. Better late than never then”

“What?”

“Eric proposed to me” Y/N stated.

I shake my head, suddenly dizzy by what I just heard. Torn between confusion, despair, and a nervous breakdown, I feel like screaming and laughing at the same time because if I heard her correctly it is ridiculous. 

“Are you serious?”

Was Y/N testing me? I thought she liked me. Up until three minutes ago, that was what she made me believe. I’m not crazy, she said 'something more’, didn't she? So how could she be marrying another guy? And that stupid englishman of all people? It must be a joke.

“Didn’t you want me to tell you about my personal life? This is personal” Y/N crossed her arms, “Eric proposed to me”

“Okay, you are serious” I said to myself, “What did you say?” I turned my face to her, a pleading look on my face. At that moment it was impossible to read her expression and the silence was killing me, “Did you accept, Y/N?”

“Yes”

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗱𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗺𝘂𝗰𝗵 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗱 ❤ 𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗺𝗲 𝗮 𝗿𝗲𝗽𝗹𝘆 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝘀𝗸! 𝗶 𝘄𝗼𝘂𝗹𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ revised version: 09.25.2021