How To Write A Haiku (Explained As A Haiku)

How to write a Haiku (Explained as a Haiku)

Five syllables here.

Something seven syllables.

Five more syllables.

Bespinben’s MIDI of “Through the Sea Of Time/Grovyle’s Sacrifice for Piano” From Pokemon Mystery Dungeon 2 edited to play as a soft harp tune. Album art by me (X)

Help me Explain

Help me explain to my mom that:

- She needs to stop pressuring me into social situations than I am not comfortable with.

- I am perfectly comfortable with the number of friends I have.

- My aversion to social interactions is not because of my roommate.

- I do not just “Think [I’m] asexual because [my] roommate constantly talks about being asexual.”

- Being ace is a real thing and that my roommate is ace.

- I should be allowed to question my sexual orientation.

- I am not cishet: I’m a demigirl, and questioning my sexual and romantic orientation

- I am LITERALLY too busy trying to do well in college to deal with the drama of dating

-I want to get through college before I even start thinking about marriage

- I do not want to have kids

It is time to purge the bots in a righteous storm of fire. Let’s give them hell.

🔥Purge the bots🔥

The Great Bot Purge: Stage 3 ‘War’

Friends, bot purgers, warriors, it’s almost time to move on to stage 3: 'war’. Now that we have proof that our efforts are working, we are going to eradicate thousands every day. The enemy made a big mistake. Porn bot boosted posts. In the botting world it’s called 'incest’. Yup.

I have a list with 100k+ bot accounts that need to be eradicated. Since this is such a big task, I call upon everyone to join @purgethebots and to turn on notifications for this blog. Please reblog this post, maybe tag a few friends, and prepare yourselves for stage 3.

Story of my life:

“I’m going to get some food and then do my homework.”

*gets food then watches youtube for four hours*

“Fuck.”

[Video of venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough standing amid vegetation.  On a near-horizontal branch above his head is a brown and yellow greater bird of paradise, about the size of a crow, with big floaty yellow plumage puffing out along its back.]

Bird:  Pwuk.  Pwuk. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  This, surely – Bird (hopping along the branch):  WUKWUKWUkwukwukwukoooh.  Oooh.  Oooh.

[Cut.  Same shot.]

Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  This, surely, is one – Bird:  Kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark kark. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  This, surely –

[Cut.  Same shot but the bird is on the other side now and venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough has his hand on the branch.]

Bird (hopping up and down on venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough’s fingers):  Eh-eh.  Eh-eh.  Eh-urrrr.  Eh-urrrr. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  Close up – Bird (hopping away from him):  Tiktiktiktik.  Tiktiktiktik. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – the plumes – Bird (hopping around):  Huek. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough: – are truly – Bird:  Huek. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – exquisite. Bird:  Huek.  Eh-eh. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  The gauzy – Bird (hopping and spinning on the spot):  HukWUKWUKWukwukoooh.  Oooh. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  …

[Cut.  Same shot but the bird is back on the original side of the branch.]

Bird:  Aark. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  Of course, by the eighteenth century – Bird:  Ehhh. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – naturalists realized that birds of paradise – Bird (hops across to the other side of the branch) Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – did have – Bird (hopping back again):  Krrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – legs.  Even so – Bird:  WUKWUKWUKWukwukwukooh.

[Cut.  Same shot.] Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough (apparently trying to tickle the bird’s tummy):  – by about the eighteenth century – Bird (hops away and spins round) Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – and so – Bird:  AAAAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK AAAK aaak. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough (wearily):  …  Very well.

[Cut.  Same shot.]

Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – but Karl Linnaeus, the great – Bird (vibrating rapidly on the spot and then flapping its wings):  PWAAAAAAAK. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – classifier of the natural world – Bird:  AAAAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAAUUUH AAUUH. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – when he came to allocate a scientific name – Bird:  … Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – to this bird – Bird:  … Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – called it – Bird:  Wooo-ooo. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – wooo-ooo – Bird (surveys the surroundings with a dignified turn of the head) Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  ‘paradisia apoda’: the bird of paradise – Bird:  Hoooo. Venerable TV naturalist David Attenborough:  – without legs. Bird:  Eh-eh.

[Close-up of the bird.]

Bird:  WUKWUKWUKWUkwukwukwukwukoooh.  Ooh. Bird:  Ooh.

[Fade to black.]