
Creator/writer of I Need A Miracle, host of Merely Roleplayers. (Those are podcasts.) He/him.
1362 posts
Midnight Pals: Physical Fitness
Midnight Pals: Physical Fitness
[at the beach] Sonia Greene: oh howard this was such a lovely idea! Greene: a romantic seaside picnic and just the two of us! Greene: and we've got your favorite food right here - untoasted white bread! Greene: isn't this nice? HP Lovecraft: [sweats, stares at ocean] right sure
HP Lovecraft: Hey! Quit kicking sand in our faces! Sonia Greene: that man is the worst nuisance on the beach! Aleister Crowley: [grabbing Lovecraft] listen here, I'd smash your face, only you're so skinny you might dry up and blow away!
Crowley: [to greene, as he manhandles lovecraft] look babe, why don't you drop that zero and get with the hero Crowley: i'll show you how a real man kicks sand in people's faces! Crowley: THE GREAT BEAST!!! DO AS THOU WILLT!!!!
Lovecraft: The big bully! I'll get even some day! Greene: oh don't let it bother you, little boy Greene: i'll fix you up a nice big meal, put some meat on those bones Lovecraft: and that'll help me build muscle? Greene: [sweats] um muscle? um sure yeah muscle
Poe: howard, you need to stop letting aleister pick on you Lovecraft: but he's twice my size! he's all buff cuz of all the mountain climbing! Poe: you could start working out? Lovecraft: you mean physical labor? Lovecraft: sport?! Lovecraft: [sweats] like a common cornishman?!?
Poe: you should try it Poe: a good regimen of rowing and swimming helped me build mass Barker: oh come on edgar Poe: no really! Poe: [removes shirt, revealing he is super swole] Barker: Barker: oh right Barker: right i forgot about that
Mary Shelley: listen up nerd you don't need exercise Shelley: what you need is one of these [flips switchblade] Poe: oh come on mary, what if he gets attacked when he doesn't have knife on him? Shelley: dunno, that's never come up
Shelley: next time aleister gives you shit, you give him one of these [pantomimes shivving] Poe: mary, violence never solved anything Shelley: it does if you're good at it Poe: Barker: ah ha ha she's got you there edgar
Lovecraft: Darn it! I'm sick and tired of being a scarecrow! William Hope Hodgson says he can give me a real body. all right! i'll gamble a stamp and get his free book Lovecraft: i'll just not eat this week to afford the stamp
William Hope Hodgson: are you "fed up" with seeing the huskies walk off with the best of everything? Hodgson: sick and tired of being soft, frail, skinny or flabby? Hodgson: i know because i myself was once a puny 97 pound "runt" Hodgson: today, I am two separate gorillas
Hodgson: give me 5 weeks and my body building plan will turn YOU into the bronzed adonis you were meant to be Hodgson: through a dynamic combination of cardiovascular training, lifting big kegs, and standing in the desert while getting your balls tanned by an ultraviolet machine
Lovecraft: wow, how's you get so buff?? Hodgson: from constant brawling during my navy days Lovecraft: w-wait Lovecraft: you're a sailor?? Hodgson: yeah you should know from my popular lecture series about how much the navy fuckin sucks ass Lovecraft: [sweats]
Hodgson: ugh, i tell you Hodgson: it's just impossible to pay the bills with pseudoscience fitness programs catering to mens' insecurities Hodgson: i'm gonna pivot to weird fiction instead Hodgson: that's where the big money is
Hodgson: what if a bunch of pig men attacked a big house Smith: [on phone] hey clark ashton? it's me! your cousin! marvin smith! Smith: you know that new horror genre you're been looking for? Smith: well, listen to this! [aims phone at hodgson]
-
ibrithir-was-here liked this · 9 months ago
-
duwango reblogged this · 9 months ago
-
duwango liked this · 9 months ago
-
chijaru700 liked this · 11 months ago
-
morebadbookcovers reblogged this · 11 months ago
-
interdimensionalfreak reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
interdimensionalfreak liked this · 1 year ago
-
heavenlymusickcorporation liked this · 1 year ago
-
missbananarose reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
missbananarose liked this · 1 year ago
-
vespertilianthing liked this · 1 year ago
-
paraprosdokia liked this · 1 year ago
-
mulder-its-me-223 liked this · 1 year ago
-
kurascoffeesips liked this · 1 year ago
-
thescienceofbeans liked this · 1 year ago
-
ticktopsworld liked this · 1 year ago
-
plummetationzigzags reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
plummetationzigzags liked this · 1 year ago
-
angryoldtree reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
silverblood10 liked this · 1 year ago
-
lost-carcosa reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
localfreak liked this · 1 year ago
-
sofiaandoslo liked this · 1 year ago
-
selenpress reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
strangemajik liked this · 1 year ago
-
marks6cherry liked this · 1 year ago
-
voxrolly liked this · 1 year ago
-
houseofzann liked this · 1 year ago
-
anxiousteacher liked this · 1 year ago
-
occasionallydiverting liked this · 1 year ago
-
floating-on-the-river liked this · 1 year ago
-
thera-prickle reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
thera-prickle liked this · 1 year ago
-
anxietyfroggo liked this · 1 year ago
-
coffeeflavoredyogurt liked this · 1 year ago
-
me3dia liked this · 1 year ago
-
tentacledwizard liked this · 1 year ago
-
nofasstuff liked this · 1 year ago
-
paarthurnax44 liked this · 1 year ago
-
the-god-of-death liked this · 1 year ago
-
upstartraven liked this · 1 year ago
-
harusamemosuke liked this · 1 year ago
-
janedrewfinally liked this · 1 year ago
-
vampiiriic liked this · 1 year ago
-
kerflufflepuff reblogged this · 1 year ago
-
kerflufflepuff liked this · 1 year ago
-
williamjbowles liked this · 1 year ago
-
sage-outrage liked this · 1 year ago
-
daystarsearcher liked this · 1 year ago
More Posts from Merelymatt



this is the funniest overlap to me. elsa killed those guys

apparently someone in Edinburgh has been updating the street signs for pride
CAST ANNOUNCEMENTS HAVE BEGUN, follow @inyourbenevolence to get them.hot off the press instead of when they roll off my queue!
"Can you grieve for something that hasn't had a chance to really exist yet?"
Kildress, the Artist – played by David Holt


In your benevolence, the Artist appeals for A dream come true.
@merelymatt says, if you've ever been stuck at the final hurdle of a fic, or a drawing, or any artwork – so near, and yet so far – this one's for you. David absolutely nails the frustration and the yearning, the wanting it to be finished but also wanting it to be perfect, just like you imagined.
I love podcasts bc on episode 1 you can't tell the characters apart but by episode 20 you can recognize their breathing

Description below the cut:
@thekilda
In this supernatural thriller series, listeners will follow Lockie, a charismatic con man who escapes to St Kilda with the promise that this time he’ll change his ways. Unfortunately, the island and its unusual inhabitants have other ideas. He seeks redemption and they seek a saviour, but you know what they say - no change without sacrifice.