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The wolf is so done with the fox’s bs 😂

Emilia Clarke being interviewed at the Met Gala, 2018

I need this!

I am fascinated with the concept of Itachi being Lan Xichen and the different relationships he would have, especially with JGY. Like Itachi is nowhere near naive enough to be completely fooled by the man, but he wouldn't necessarily dislike him? Maybe? And what his feelings about WWX and his relationship with LWJ? I can definitely see him giving WWX the shovel talk that he never got in canon

Meng Yao: says something Lan Xichen, internally: awe, that's such a cute attempt at manipulation. Such a cute baby, why yes he is. I can't wait to see how he progresses.

Itachi can't help but be fond of Meng Yao who's the closest to having a shinobi mindset in this world.

BUT IMAGINE the ways in which Itachi likes to fuck with Meng Yao. Like the little crush Meng Yao has on him. Itachi makes sure to be a little more smiley, a little more physically affectionate around Meng Yao as a result, tripping up the poor guy's mind from having another go at trying a manipulation attempt. He teaches Meng Yao a fun little Uchiha song for children instead of Clarity and smirks. He says leading sentences that makes Meng Yao sweat, thinking he's been caught, before saying the rest of the sentence which is about a whole different topic.

Itachi feels like Wei Wuxian is the sunshine to Lan Wangji's more reserved demeanor. It's cute, almost like watching Shisui and him interacting. Plus Wei Wuxian is pretty smart and Itachi does want to get his hands on Wei Wuxian's newest inventions, so what better way than to have Wei Wuxian as an in-law?

Itachi gives Wei Wuxian a shovel talk with threats about dogs and a certain Hound popping up where the rabbits reside. (Itachi has kept his sharingan a secret, but he gives Wei Wuxian a couple nice nightmares about what could be if he doesn't treat Lan Wangji right.)

👏🏾Education 👏🏾is 👏🏾a 👏🏾right,👏🏾 not👏🏾 a👏🏾 service 👏🏾

Pass along and use the shit out of them

I posted 1,686 times in 2021

128 posts created (8%)

1558 posts reblogged (92%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 12.2 posts.

I added 1,760 tags in 2021

#gif - 579 posts

#fanart - 185 posts

#one piece - 184 posts

#video - 141 posts

#animal - 139 posts

#trafalgar law - 129 posts

#art - 127 posts

#monkey d. luffy - 113 posts

#alice in borderland - 85 posts

#writing - 78 posts

Longest Tag: 135 characters

#lmao so many ppl raging in the notes about how the science of one sentence is wrong and i just like the fact that the scenery is pretty

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Title: Long Live the King (And His Immortal Court)

Fandom: Solo Leveling

Character/Pairing: Sung Jin-Woo, Sung Jin-Woo & National Level Hunters, Thomas Andre & Sung Jin-Woo, Goto Ryuji & Sung Jin-Woo, Sung Jin-Woo & Woo Jin-Chul, Liu Zhigang & Sung Jin-Woo

Rating: G

Word Count: 11202

Summary: Thirty-odd years after time was turned back, the war is won, the Monarchs are dead, and Jin-Woo is… no longer human, long since broken down into something Other, and then risen again as his own monster-god. He feels that more on some days than others, with an ever-growing army of dead at his back and the rest of eternity laid out in front of him, and not much attachment left to anyone or anything beyond a handful of individuals he still considers his.

His to guard, his to keep, his to hoard, because once upon a time in another life, they were friends and allies and almost-enemies who'd each glimpsed at least a little of his shadow-drenched inheritance. They'd looked into the void of his dominion, however unknowingly or even unwillingly, and Jin-Woo has never been all that good at letting go.

(Besides, one could definitely argue that this wasn't all on Jin-Woo alone. Woo Jin-Chul definitely helped goad him into it.)

Tags: Epilogue AU, Future Fic, Post-Canon AU, Canon Divergence AU, Recovered Memories, Identity Reveal, Eldritch Sung Jin-Woo, Possessive Behaviour, POV Outsider, Immortality

Exchange Tags: Bonding over shared memories of past lives, POV Outsider, Character Is A Supernatural Creature/Something Non-Human, Awkward and Unconventional Gestures of Friendship

Submitted For: - Gen Freeform Exchange 2021 - Gen Prompt Bingo [Round 19] - Memory Related

68 notes • Posted 2021-05-02 08:21:45 GMT

#4

Monday, August 16th, 2021 - Sunday, August 22nd, 2021

~

Twitter | AO3 Collection

~

General Info

What is Solo Leveling Week?

It’s a week-long fanworks event to promote the Solo Leveling fandom. There’s no sign-up, it’s just for fun, and everybody can participate. Completed works and WIPs are both acceptable, and any type of fanwork (fanfic, fanart, gifsets, etc.) is welcome. Works can focus on a character or a ship so you’re free to submit gen or ship-focused content (or both!).

General Rules:

- No harassment of any kind for any reason. You can DM the mods at our SL Events Twitter Blog if you have any questions/complaints/etc.

- Fanworks can be any rating, from kid-friendly to explicit, but we do ask that you tag properly when you post (including ships and other necessary warnings) so people will be able to avoid them if the content is something they’d rather skip over.

- Crossovers are allowed, BUT for Solo Leveling Week, an emphasis on at least one SL character is required. More specifically, please don’t place all the focus on the character(s) of a different fandom, combine them with SL’s magic system or necromancy, and call it a day. This can be considered a type of crossover, but for the purpose of this event, we want to concentrate on SL-centric works only. (ie. A BNHAxSL crossover where Midoriya gets the system to level up, and SL characters are only cameos or straight-up nonexistent would not count for this event. On the other hand, Jin-Woo attending UA and meeting Class 1-A would count.)

- Prompts have been included for SL Week (listed below), but they are only suggestions to help you along if you’re stuck on what to write/draw/etc. Feel free to come with your own ideas and post them on Creator’s Choice day!

- Again, there’s no signups for this event, and you can participate by posting a fanwork for just one day, every day, or whichever days suit you best. There’s no minimum number of fanworks you need to meet, SL Week is purely for SL fans to create new content for fun.

Posting:

- AO3 would be the easiest medium for everyone to share their works, and the link is up above. The collection will open shortly before the Week begins, and everyone with an AO3 account can add their works to it.

- For those of you with Twitter, you can also post there and tag your works with #SLweek2021, and we’ll retweet everything you post.

~

Themes

And here are the themes! You can use them for inspiration, or come up with something completely different.

Day 1: Loyalty Kink | Possessive

Day 2: Accidental Relationship | Touch-Starved Character(s) | Eldritch

Day 3: Canon Divergence AU | Bond

Day 4: Time Travel | Dimension Travel | Shadows | Sacrifice

Day 5: Soulmates AU | Memory

Day 6: Time Loop AU | Crown

Day 7: Creator's Choice

~

We look forward to all the new content come August!

71 notes • Posted 2021-05-10 04:20:51 GMT

#3

Current Mood: tfw you want to write but also don't want to write

73 notes • Posted 2021-09-06 04:27:35 GMT

#2

Thank you so much. Bc of u I started reading Trash of Count's Family and I've been super hooked! By any chance, do you have other webnovel/manhwa recs? T^T

I'm glad you like it! It's one of the best novels I've come across. For recs, you can check out my webnovel and webcomic tags, and I have a list of webnovels I'm either currently reading or have read here which you can check out. Off the top of my head though, here's a couple must-reads that are completely translated:

The Earth is Online

Supernatural Movie Actor App

Global University Entrance Examination

My Husband is Suffering from a Terminal Illness

Very Happy

Rebirth of a Movie Star

And a few ongoing ones that I'm currently following:

Don't Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin

I Became a God in a Horror Game

The E-Sports Circle's Toxic Assembly Camp

Psychic

86 notes • Posted 2021-08-25 21:39:10 GMT

#1

For @/badthingshappenbingo, for the square “Betrayal”

Title: the world turns (to the rhythm of a god-king's rage)

Fandom: Bleach

Horoscope Prompt: Scorpio: you may not want to change, but the world is unforgiving and will do it for you anyway.

Character/Pairing: Kurosaki Ichigo & Urahara Kisuke, Kurosaki Ichigo, Urahara Kisuke, Hirako Shinji, Kyouraku Shunsui, Hirako Shinji & Kyouraku Shunsui, Hirako Shinji & Kurosaki Ichigo, Hirako Shinji & Urahara Kisuke

Rating: T

Word Count: 8888

Summary: Betrayal is a choice that should only be made when you are prepared to accept whatever retribution follows.

Tags: Post-Canon AU, Canon Divergence AU, Soul King Ichigo, Post-Quincy War AU, Apocalypse, Post-Apocalypse, Character Death, Ichigo vs. Gotei 13, Post-Betrayal, Touch-Starved

Also Submitted For: 100 Prompts Challenge - 002. Final UraIchi Prompt Challenge 5 @uraichievents

149 notes • Posted 2021-01-04 22:09:14 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

I posted 1,686 times in 2021

128 posts created (8%)

1558 posts reblogged (92%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 12.2 posts.

I added 1,760 tags in 2021

#gif - 579 posts

#fanart - 185 posts

#one piece - 184 posts

#video - 141 posts

#animal - 139 posts

#trafalgar law - 129 posts

#art - 127 posts

#monkey d. luffy - 113 posts

#alice in borderland - 85 posts

#writing - 78 posts

Longest Tag: 135 characters

#lmao so many ppl raging in the notes about how the science of one sentence is wrong and i just like the fact that the scenery is pretty

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Title: Long Live the King (And His Immortal Court)

Fandom: Solo Leveling

Character/Pairing: Sung Jin-Woo, Sung Jin-Woo & National Level Hunters, Thomas Andre & Sung Jin-Woo, Goto Ryuji & Sung Jin-Woo, Sung Jin-Woo & Woo Jin-Chul, Liu Zhigang & Sung Jin-Woo

Rating: G

Word Count: 11202

Summary: Thirty-odd years after time was turned back, the war is won, the Monarchs are dead, and Jin-Woo is… no longer human, long since broken down into something Other, and then risen again as his own monster-god. He feels that more on some days than others, with an ever-growing army of dead at his back and the rest of eternity laid out in front of him, and not much attachment left to anyone or anything beyond a handful of individuals he still considers his.

His to guard, his to keep, his to hoard, because once upon a time in another life, they were friends and allies and almost-enemies who'd each glimpsed at least a little of his shadow-drenched inheritance. They'd looked into the void of his dominion, however unknowingly or even unwillingly, and Jin-Woo has never been all that good at letting go.

(Besides, one could definitely argue that this wasn't all on Jin-Woo alone. Woo Jin-Chul definitely helped goad him into it.)

Tags: Epilogue AU, Future Fic, Post-Canon AU, Canon Divergence AU, Recovered Memories, Identity Reveal, Eldritch Sung Jin-Woo, Possessive Behaviour, POV Outsider, Immortality

Exchange Tags: Bonding over shared memories of past lives, POV Outsider, Character Is A Supernatural Creature/Something Non-Human, Awkward and Unconventional Gestures of Friendship

Submitted For: - Gen Freeform Exchange 2021 - Gen Prompt Bingo [Round 19] - Memory Related

68 notes • Posted 2021-05-02 08:21:45 GMT

#4

Monday, August 16th, 2021 - Sunday, August 22nd, 2021

~

Twitter | AO3 Collection

~

General Info

What is Solo Leveling Week?

It’s a week-long fanworks event to promote the Solo Leveling fandom. There’s no sign-up, it’s just for fun, and everybody can participate. Completed works and WIPs are both acceptable, and any type of fanwork (fanfic, fanart, gifsets, etc.) is welcome. Works can focus on a character or a ship so you’re free to submit gen or ship-focused content (or both!).

General Rules:

- No harassment of any kind for any reason. You can DM the mods at our SL Events Twitter Blog if you have any questions/complaints/etc.

- Fanworks can be any rating, from kid-friendly to explicit, but we do ask that you tag properly when you post (including ships and other necessary warnings) so people will be able to avoid them if the content is something they’d rather skip over.

- Crossovers are allowed, BUT for Solo Leveling Week, an emphasis on at least one SL character is required. More specifically, please don’t place all the focus on the character(s) of a different fandom, combine them with SL’s magic system or necromancy, and call it a day. This can be considered a type of crossover, but for the purpose of this event, we want to concentrate on SL-centric works only. (ie. A BNHAxSL crossover where Midoriya gets the system to level up, and SL characters are only cameos or straight-up nonexistent would not count for this event. On the other hand, Jin-Woo attending UA and meeting Class 1-A would count.)

- Prompts have been included for SL Week (listed below), but they are only suggestions to help you along if you’re stuck on what to write/draw/etc. Feel free to come with your own ideas and post them on Creator’s Choice day!

- Again, there’s no signups for this event, and you can participate by posting a fanwork for just one day, every day, or whichever days suit you best. There’s no minimum number of fanworks you need to meet, SL Week is purely for SL fans to create new content for fun.

Posting:

- AO3 would be the easiest medium for everyone to share their works, and the link is up above. The collection will open shortly before the Week begins, and everyone with an AO3 account can add their works to it.

- For those of you with Twitter, you can also post there and tag your works with #SLweek2021, and we’ll retweet everything you post.

~

Themes

And here are the themes! You can use them for inspiration, or come up with something completely different.

Day 1: Loyalty Kink | Possessive

Day 2: Accidental Relationship | Touch-Starved Character(s) | Eldritch

Day 3: Canon Divergence AU | Bond

Day 4: Time Travel | Dimension Travel | Shadows | Sacrifice

Day 5: Soulmates AU | Memory

Day 6: Time Loop AU | Crown

Day 7: Creator's Choice

~

We look forward to all the new content come August!

71 notes • Posted 2021-05-10 04:20:51 GMT

#3

Current Mood: tfw you want to write but also don't want to write

73 notes • Posted 2021-09-06 04:27:35 GMT

#2

Thank you so much. Bc of u I started reading Trash of Count's Family and I've been super hooked! By any chance, do you have other webnovel/manhwa recs? T^T

I'm glad you like it! It's one of the best novels I've come across. For recs, you can check out my webnovel and webcomic tags, and I have a list of webnovels I'm either currently reading or have read here which you can check out. Off the top of my head though, here's a couple must-reads that are completely translated:

The Earth is Online

Supernatural Movie Actor App

Global University Entrance Examination

My Husband is Suffering from a Terminal Illness

Very Happy

Rebirth of a Movie Star

And a few ongoing ones that I'm currently following:

Don't Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin

I Became a God in a Horror Game

The E-Sports Circle's Toxic Assembly Camp

Psychic

86 notes • Posted 2021-08-25 21:39:10 GMT

#1

For @/badthingshappenbingo, for the square “Betrayal”

Title: the world turns (to the rhythm of a god-king's rage)

Fandom: Bleach

Horoscope Prompt: Scorpio: you may not want to change, but the world is unforgiving and will do it for you anyway.

Character/Pairing: Kurosaki Ichigo & Urahara Kisuke, Kurosaki Ichigo, Urahara Kisuke, Hirako Shinji, Kyouraku Shunsui, Hirako Shinji & Kyouraku Shunsui, Hirako Shinji & Kurosaki Ichigo, Hirako Shinji & Urahara Kisuke

Rating: T

Word Count: 8888

Summary: Betrayal is a choice that should only be made when you are prepared to accept whatever retribution follows.

Tags: Post-Canon AU, Canon Divergence AU, Soul King Ichigo, Post-Quincy War AU, Apocalypse, Post-Apocalypse, Character Death, Ichigo vs. Gotei 13, Post-Betrayal, Touch-Starved

Also Submitted For: 100 Prompts Challenge - 002. Final UraIchi Prompt Challenge 5 @uraichievents

149 notes • Posted 2021-01-04 22:09:14 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

Bella is doomed

Kind of a continuation of my previous post.

By the end of Breaking Dawn, Bella is wonderfully happy with her life. Edward, Renesmée, Cullens, material wealth, vampirism, she has it all. Unfortunately I don’t think she has any idea what she signed up for, and it’s not just because this girl thinks being a vampire means being a sparkly princess.

So, when it comes to being a Cullen, Bella signed up for this really specific type of lifestyle that can’t last forever. Even if living among humans while keeping the secret in the 21st century was sustainable (and it isn’t - facial recognition, social media, and our tech overlords mean that the Cullens are playing with fire), human society will still change. The day will inevitably come where Bella looks around herself and doesn’t recognize the world she’s living in. And I think that will be a very real problem for her.

Bella is by no means poor, but she is a lower middle class girl who has been working on the side since she was fifteen so she can get into college. When she meets the Cullens, she very much notices their material wealth. She notices their cars, their clothes, their house. She’s mortified by Edward’s ostentatious gifts, but she clearly covets that wealth. And she very badly does not want to be that kind of person. She is every bit the romantic who wants true love and the whole shebang, so for her to ever admit that Edward’s wealth is a perk she enjoys, something about him that she’s attracted to, would be up there with aborting Renesmée on the list of things Bella is never, ever, doing. I digress.

Bella’s happiness in Breaking Dawn is built on three things, there’s 1. Edward, 2. Renesmée, and 3. the Cullen family package. And the Cullen family package is the people in the family, the family dynamic, and their lifestyle.

So, the lifestyle is doomed. This is just a fact of life. Environmental change alone means things will change.

Then there’s the fact that the Cullens are a very dysfunctional, and quite young, coven. Edward and Rosalie don’t get on at all, he consistently believes the absolute worst of her, that she’s out to get him (in this outtake he thinks she’s lying about Bella being dead because it’s Rosalie, she’s the worst), and the nicest thing he’ll say about her is that she’s too headstrong and proud to eat people. Just… this guy despises her on every level. Alice and Rosalie are not close either, they seem to be civil enough around each other when times are good, but Alice jumps on Bella with far too much zeal. Rosalie herself reflects (x) that Alice seems to prefer Bella over her. Then we have Jasper and Edward, who also don’t seem close at all, in Midnight Sun Edward has so little faith in Jasper’s ability to learn control that he wonders why the guy even burdens everyone else by trying. In every way he seems to hold Jasper in very low regard, and they don’t seem to be at all close.

You also have Rosalie and Emmett eloping every now and then, you have Edward leaving for years at a time, you have New Moon where the whole family scatters.

I don’t think the Cullens staying together forever is a given at all, in fact I believe a split is inevitable.

Just - Bella signed up for this wholesome, stable family, but she doesn’t know who these people are at all. In Eclipse she’s shocked to learn Jasper and Rosalie have personalities. She also very much see them as a nuclear family of father, mother, and children, but do Carlisle and Jasper have a father/son dynamic? Esme and Alice a mother/daughter dynamic? They love each other like family or believe they all do anyway but the nuclear family is just the cover story they need to blend in.

The point I’m trying to get at here, is that Bella signed up for a lifestyle that won’t last, with a family filled with people far more complicated than she realizes and that most likely will break apart down the line as the cracks become chasms.

I also think that Edward is not such a certainty in her life as Bella thinks, I think he fell for the human and that their marriage only survives in Breaking Dawn because Bella’s amazing control lets her remain human in so many ways, and even that survival is untenable. But that’s for another post.

Bella wanted vampirism because she wanted this happy ending she didn’t fully understand, and as that happy ending starts falling apart she’ll come to resent vampirism.

Basically, by the end of Breaking Dawn I’m just left feeling bad for Bella. She has no idea what vampires are or what she signed up for, she signed up for a very specific type of lifestyle that won’t last forever. America won’t last forever, society will turn like a kaleidoscope, and a time will come when the world she’s living in is one that isn’t hers any more than the 21st century is Carlisle’s. And this is all even assuming the Cullens last forever, when this is a very young coven who have serious, deep-running internal strifes and dysfunctions.

The great mystery of life: how are there only thirty something Aro/Carlisle fics on ao3. Unbelievable.

Well, remember that until @therealvinelle and I showed up talking nonsense, if Aro/Carlisle was brought up it was to mock the ridiculousness of the ship.

This is a fandom that lives and dies by canon couples. (If you need evidence, just look at the relative unpopularity of Jacob/Edward, which in any other fandom would be the slash ship that utterly dominates everything else but especially Edward/Bella. It is not in the top slot.)

My TLTIC Bingo Card

I left a comment on @therealvinelle and @thecarnivorousmuffinmeta's fic The Less Than Immaculate Conception about bingo cards and Vinelle asked me to share with the class.

In the spirit of class assignments, I made this in under an hour on a time crunch (I have to go to work righ after I post this) with little thought or effort whatsoever. The walls are covered in half-cooked spaghetti. If nothing else, though, I had a ton of fun making this!

i love your metas! I just discovered them today and have spent all afternoon reading them. I have two part ask, if that's okay. Firstly, do you think a sensible version of bella could survive if she recognised early on that keeping on Edward's good side was her only survival option? and secondly, on the flip side, just how unhinged do you think bella could be before edward rejected her?

Ooh, both interesting questions, anon. Let's do this.

Sane Bella and the Yandere Simulator

Last time, on The Carnivorous Muffin's ridiculous blog, we covered what would happen to a sensible Bella who realizes the Cullens are not fluffy bunnies she should take home.

The long and short, Edward eats her.

Edward's romantic interest in Bella, the thing that has him fighting his own baser nature to keep her alive, is dependent on a few things.

One of those is Bella's interest in turn.

In time, if Bella truly was not interested in him, he would eat her. Alice tells us there's only two paths for Bella: death or vampire. Leaving her and walking away is never a true option for Edward.

So, Sane Bella loses Yandere Simulator because she doesn't realize the key aspect of Yandere Simulator: You Never Say No to Yandere.

However, you point out something interesting here, that this is a sensible Bella.

Sensible people do not immediately think they're playing Yandere Simulator. You don't run across people like Edward often, there aren't many of him, and while there are red flags early in Twilight Edward did a pretty good job of making them not particularly visible.

By the time we hit Eclipse he's pretty much thrown pretending to be nice and sane out the window. Luckily for Bella, that doesn't appear to bother her as much as it should.

Bella thinking "if I don't play along with this inhuman whack job he'll eat me", is paranoid lunacy. It is not the first conclusion a reasonable person would jump to.

That it happens to be the right conclusion is irrelevant.

But alright, I'll play ball.

Paranoid Bella and the Yandere Simulator

Bella is utterly paranoid and wearing her tin foil hat when she enters Forks. She remembers Biology very well and when Edward comes back and pretends to be nice she gives him a strained smile and thinks, "This motherfucker will eat me the moment my back is turned."

Bella considers travelling back to Florida, but that would be leading Edward to her mother, more it would be very easy to find Bella if he truly wished to.

Florida isn't an option.

Bella tries to keep her distance from Edward, hard when he sits next to her in Biology, but he seems willing to ignore her. Bella calms down a little, maybe this will work out.

Bella is nearly crushed by a van, desperately pretends she definitely did not see Edward fold that van like a pretzel. Nope, no siree Bob, Bella is concussed! She then stays awake all night in terror and OH GOD HE'S CLIMBING THROUGH HER WINDOW! HE'S GOING TO EAT HER IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT! HE KNOWS THAT SHE KNOWS!

Bella pretends to sleep, horrified, and Edward stays there all night. Staring.

(Edward, meanwhile, is realizing he's in love.)

Bella enters school a nervous wreck, waiting for that fateful Biology class and... Edward is studiously ignoring her. He doesn't even say hello.

Bella would be relieved, except he keeps sneaking into her bedroom at night, staring. Bella gets no sleep for weeks.

Then the blood testing happens and suddenly Edward is talking to her. He tells her they shouldn't be friends and he doesn't want to be friends, GREAT, EDWARD, THAT'S GREAT. But then it's very clear that he's after something, and Bella's spidey senses are tingling.

Edward doesn't want to be friends.

Oh, oh shit.

Suddenly, Edward sneaking into her room at night takes on a whole, new, sinister twist. First he'll rape her, then he'll eat her (or who knows, maybe vice versa, Bella certainly doesn't want to find out).

Bella is driven home by Edward (he insists) and enters the house to wheeze into a paper bag.

She thinks over her options.

Edward can crush cars, Bella trips over asphalt. Even if she wasn't Bella, there's no way she could outfight him even if she wanted to.

Edward was very concerned when he suspected that she knew, he likely still suspects and Bella's not a very good liar. Bella doesn't want to find out what happens to her if Edward realizes she really does know.

Edward appears to have a romantic interest in her. Does Bella really have the option of saying no?

Bella, still wheezing in her bag, comes to what seems like an inevitable decision. She must humor Edward at all costs. For the sake of her family, of her own life, she must play into his romantic overtures. Bella can't act but now, her life depends on it.

Well, Bella still can't act, but luckily for her Edward doesn't care.

Edward just thinks Bella's very jumpy, a little nervous and shy, and just plain weird (given he thinks Bella's just plain weird in canon this is not too far from normal events).

So Bella gets to live in terror for things like the meadow, where Edward talks about how easy it would be to eat her, how he contemplated murdering Biology in cold blood to eat her in the most efficient manner, how he loathed her for daring to smell delicious, how Alice warned him there was a good chance of him eating Bella in the meadow today, all while pressing his cheek against her hammering heartbeat.

"AH HA HA HA HA, EDWARD, YOU'RE SO CHARMING."

Edward invites Bella to the house. These creepy, man eating, people all meet her with smiles. Edward has composed her a lullaby. One of them, Alice, tells Bella they're going to be best friends.

"AH HA HA HA HA, EDWARD YOUR FAMILY IS SO NICE."

In other words, somehow, all of Twilight still happens because Bella is terrified of saying no.

At least, until Volterra. Given Bella's being hunted by Victoria, even had Bella not gone cliff diving eventually Alice would see her eaten and then black out as the wolves chased off Victoria instead.

Bella spends New Moon having a great time. Mostly. The Cullens are finally gone, she's free, she spends weeks on edge thinking they might come back.

Just when she starts to relax, fucking Laurent shows up and learns Victoria's trying to kill her. Because of Edward, because of course, it's always about Edward. WHY ARE VAMPIRES ALWAYS TRYING TO KILL HER?!

Regardless, Alice shows up and goes, "Bella, my god, you're alive!" And Bella dies inside. Alice Cullen is back. Oh no.

Bella pretends she's thrilled to see her. Alice, her best friend, her favorite demon. Hurray. Alice fills Bella in on the New Moon scoop, Bella pretends to be very invested. Then Alice gets the vision.

Edward has decided to commit suicide via the Volturi.

Bella has no problem with this, unfortunately, she realizes that Alice clearly has a problem with this. Alice fully expects Bella to run off to Italy to save Fucking Edward.

Once again, Bella isn't sure she's allowed to say no.

Bella runs to Italy, finds herself saving Edward's life, and then she's brought before the Volturi where she might very well be executed because Edward Cullen happened to involve her in this mess.

BELLA NEVER WANTED TO BE HERE.

Bella snaps. She's crying, she just can't take it anymore, and she finally loses her shit at Edward. SHE NEVER LOVED HIM! HE IS SCARY AND WON'T LEAVE HER ALONE! IF THEY'RE GOING TO KILL HER JUST DO IT NOW BECAUSE SHE CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE.

Aro watches Bella's mental breakdown in utter amazement. Naturally, while Marcus suspected something was funky with those two, Aro did not see this coming from Edward's perspective.

Aro offers Bella her out, it is unfortunately death or vampire, but vampire is very much an option and Aro will offer Bella sanctuary in the Volturi.

Bella takes that offer and runs with it.

Edward is devastated and blindsided.

Somehow, neither he nor Alice saw this one coming.

But to answer your question: Paranoid Bella survives Yandere Simulator By Defecting to the Volturi

How Unhinged Does Bella Have to Be For Edward to Dump Her?

He won't.

Remember, Edward in canon thinks there's something legitimately wrong with Bella. She doesn't think like normal people, she always makes the least rational choice, and he can't hear her thoughts.

Edward doesn't think Bella's gifted just that she's... different. (Bella, hilariously, immediately picks up that Edward's calling her a freak. Edward backtracks hard on that one.)

Bella's decisions also become increasingly ridiculous as the series goes on.

She stabs herself in the middle of a battle, she insists on having sex with him while human, she consorts with shapeshifters (to Edward this is lunacy), she picked up motorcycle riding, she threw herself off a cliff, she ran from his sweet protection to the reservation, she believes he doesn't love her, and she doesn't want to get married.

I imagine Edward thinks there isn't anywhere left for Bella to go. She's left the planet, unhinged is her middle name.

But none of that matters.

I already linked the Edward/Bella post I always link near the top so I'll just recap. For Edward, it's all about the blood, the silence, and the projection.

An unhinged Bella is still a delicious and silent Bella. He can still pretend she's Carlisle.

Even if Bella became addicted to cocaine, and ruined that sweet scent, it wouldn't tarnish her memory. He'd nurse her back to health, then eat her so she never relapses.

That's the trouble with Edward/Bella, it's not about Bella, not at all. You could replace her with sweet smelling cardboard and Edward would not notice a difference.

The fandom ghost and I had fun on artbreeder, and bred our respective attempts to create Carlisle. The result was perfection.

Truly a face that makes his hospital colleagues feel they’re in the Night at the Museum franchise, and the reason they never see him in the day is because he has to return to the museum’s Greek statues exhibition before sunrise.

Jarvis is my co pilot by woshizhazhazha

After that,no one has ever called him Sir…  

Me 6 months ago(pre-tumblr): Ugh this fic is so good, I really love JARVIS and Tony. But that's creepy *Puts Cyberhusband thoughts in a box*

Current day me: *calmly sips tea and succumbs to cyberhusbands and irony OT3 and watches as the world burns around me*

Idea for Cyberhusbands

J.a.r.v.i.s - Just a rather very intelligent superhero.

After the Age of Ultron, people thought Jarvis was now in Vision but the truth is some part of he was still around the internet. Having most of the memory loss, Jarvis just remembers his name and over time, he’s able to regain some abilities. He found out that he could help people with their computer.

As someone doesn’t know much about technology, I’d love to have something or someone fix my laptop. it drives me crazy sometimes. 

I also imagine Jarvis fights against Ultron and he becomes powerful Skynet but he still our sweet and sassy Jarvis. 

Sorry for my English. XD This couple needs more love.

I’d pay top dollar to watch this for an hour

tywinning asked you: 2012-08-09 03:37

As a professor, may I ask you what you think about fanfiction?

I think fanfiction is literature and literature, for the most part, is fanfiction, and that anyone that dismisses it simply on the grounds that it’s derivative knows fuck-all about literature and needs to get the hell off my lawn.

Most of the history of Western literature (and probably much of non-Western literature, but I can’t speak to that) is adapted or appropriated from something else.  Homer wrote historyfic and Virgil wrote Homerfic and Dante wrote Virgilfic (where he makes himself a character and writes himself hanging out with Homer and Virgil and they’re like “OMG Dante you’re so cool.“  He was the original Gary Stu).  Milton wrote Bible fanfic, and everyone and their mom spent the Middle Ages writing King Arthur fanfic.  In the sixteenth century you and another dude could translate the same Petrarchan sonnet and somehow have it count as two separate poems, and no one gave a fuck.  Shakespeare doesn’t have a single original plot–although much of it would be more rightly termed RPF–and then John Fletcher and Mary Cowden Clarke and Gloria Naylor and Jane Smiley and Stephen Sondheim wrote Shakespeare fanfic.  Guys like Pope and Dryden took old narratives and rewrote them to make fun of people they didn’t like, because the eighteenth century was basically high school.  And Spenser!  Don’t even get me started on Spenser.

Here’s what fanfic authors/fans need to remember when anyone gives them shit: the idea that originality is somehow a good thing, an innately preferable thing, is a completely modern notion.  Until about three hundred years ago, a good writer, by and large, was someone who could take a tried-and-true story and make it even more awesome.  (If you want to sound fancy, the technical term is imitatio.)  People were like, why would I wanna read something about some dude I’ve never heard of?  There’s a new Sir Gawain story out, man!  (As to when and how that changed, I tend to blame Daniel Defoe, or the Modernists, or reality television, depending on my mood.)

I also find fanfic fascinating because it takes all the barriers that keep people from professional authorship–barriers that have weakened over the centuries but are nevertheless still very real–and blows right past them. Producing literature, much less circulating it, was something that was well nigh impossible for the vast majority of people for most of human history.  First you had to live in a culture where people thought it was acceptable for you to even want to be literate in the first place.  And then you had to find someone who could teach you how to read and write (the two didn’t necessarily go together).  And you needed sufficient leisure time to learn.  And be able to afford books, or at least be friends with someone rich enough to own books who would lend them to you.  Good writers are usually well-read and professional writing is a full-time job, so you needed a lot of books, and a lot of leisure time both for reading and writing.  And then you had to be in a high enough social position that someone would take you seriously and want to read your work–to have access to circulation/publication in addition to education and leisure time.  A very tiny percentage of the population fit those parameters (in England, which is the only place I can speak of with some authority, that meant from 500-1000 A.D.: monks; 1000-1500: aristocratic men and the very occasional aristocratic woman; 1500-1800: aristocratic men, some middle-class men, a few aristocratic women; 1800-on, some middle-class women as well). 

What’s amazing is how many people who didn’t fit those parameters kept writing in spite of the constant message they got from society that no one cared about what they had to say, writing letters and diaries and stories and poems that often weren’t discovered until hundreds of years later.  Humans have an urge to express themselves, to tell stories, and fanfic lets them.  If you’ve got access to a computer and an hour or two to while away of an evening, you can create something that people will see and respond to instantly, with a built-in community of people who care about what you have to say.

I do write the occasional fic; I wish I had the time and mental energy to write more.  I’ll admit I don’t read a lot of fic these days because most of it is not–and I know how snobbish this sounds–particularly well-written.  That doesn’t mean it’s “not good”–there are a lot of reasons people read fic and not all of them have to do with wanting to read finely crafted prose.  That’s why fic is awesome–it creates a place for all kinds of storytelling.  But for me personally, now that my job entails reading about 1500 pages of undergraduate writing per year, when I have time to read for enjoyment I want it to be by someone who really knows what they’re doing.  There’s tons of high-quality fic, of course, but I no longer have the time and patience to go searching for it that I had ten years ago. 

But whether I’m reading it or not, I love that fanfiction exists.  Because without people doing what fanfiction writers do, literature wouldn’t exist.  (And then I’d be out of a job and, frankly, I don’t know how to do anything else.)

Abusers don’t come with warning labels.  Abusers don’t hit you on the first date. They don’t write “I will humiliate and belittle you” on their Tinder profiles. They don’t wear “I break things to intimidate my partner” t-shirts. People don’t get trapped in damaging relationships because they saw an abuser coming from 20 yards away and decided “I’m going to date that person anyway”. That’s not how any of this works.  In the beginning, abusers can be some of the most thoughtful, attentive people you’ll ever meet. They’re obsessed with you; that’s what makes them so toxic and deadly as time goes on. Abusers buy you flowers. They remember your birthday. They remember to text you “good morning” and “good night”. They listen to your problems, confide in you and share silly inside jokes. They can keep that “loving, doting partner and best friend” mask in place for months or years if they have to.  So the first time they scream at you or hit you, you don’t see an abuser. You see your best friend, your confidante, the person who brought you soup when you were sick and always laughs at your stories about your nutty coworker. You tell yourself they just had a bad day. Maybe they were tired, sick, hungry, or under a lot of stress. You know them. You’ve made a life with them. And they’re so sorry and so ashamed of what they did. This isn’t who they are.  And so things go back to back to normal for a while. Wonderful, even. This is still one of the best relationships you’ve ever been in, even counting that one incident. You go back to date nights, cozy nights in and 5-hour-long conversations that feel effortless. And then it happens again.  And you still don’t see an abuser. You see the person who means the most to you in the whole world. You decide that maybe they’re just struggling. Maybe they have mental health issues. They’ve told you every horrible thing that’s ever happened to them as a child, and maybe it has something to do with that. But either way, they’re not an abuser. Not yet. They’re just a person who needs you more than ever.  Then things are good for a while. Then something bad happens. Then it’s good again. Then it’s bad. Good. Bad. Good. Bad. And every time it happens, it gets a little harder to get out. The time you’ve invested in the relationship goes up, and your self-esteem goes down. By the time you realize that, yes, the person you thought you knew is an Abuser with a capital A, you’re in deep. You’re a frog that stood in a pot of water so long it turned you into soup before you even noticed it was getting a little warm. But you didn’t ask for this. And you certainly didn’t know it was coming.  We have this image in our heads of what abusers must look like. We picture brawny men with low foreheads and stained white tank tops, screaming at their wives while they drink beer in front of the TV. We think they’re like wildlife, as if we could spot them with the help of a guidebook and know to stay far away from them. But they’re not. Abusers can be anyone. They can be female. They can be accomplished. They can be well-groomed. Queer. Politically far-left. Politically far-right. Artists. Athletic. Charitable. Intelligent. They can come from any walk of life, any spot on the gender spectrum, any religion, any background. It’s not the abused person’s fault for not spotting them - they can’t always be spotted. It’s the abuser’s fault for abusing. 

LOVE IS LOVE. 🌹🌹🌹

let 👏 bisexual 👏 girls 👏 love 👏 boys

let 👏 bisexual 👏 girls 👏 love 👏 boys

I’m 101% aware that most of my ships have like 00000.0001% probability of becoming canon, but I keep shipping bc…

unwind

never lose your passion folks