Stray Cat

Stray cat

here, eat

a dead mouse

laid at your feet

you didn't ask, but I hunted for you 

you looked hungry

I had time

between tissue protected fingertips

you pick it up to take it elsewhere

when you return I'm still here

you pat me on the head 

a muttered thanks

an attempt to hide the disgust on your face

an improvement from the ones before

that shoved my face in it

then threw me out

and you still look hungry

the flavors of gay thoughts and repression in wangxian are the most fun

LWJ: loud gay thoughts on the inside; enormity of my desire disgusts me; oh god he's hot oh no; repress repress repress; no one will know so long as I don't make eye contact with anyone ever again, especially xiongzhang; my purpose in life is to be pure and noble, not be gay do crime; peace and tranquility, meditation and silence, once familiar, now empty, but at least they remain; I will simply be absent of desire as far as anyone is concerned and it will be fine;

WWX: gay thoughts but for the meme, they are universally true thoughts, regardless of gender, ok, shidi; if I flirt with everyone, no one will know that one man gets the True Flirt, including myself; if I keep moving and talking and laughing then I can live head empty no thoughts as fate intended; when you think about it, like when you really consider, like I'm just saying; look at me look at me look at me, need it need it need it; did I mention it was for the meme because it seems you are taking it seriously; why are you tying that, you won't even listen, what will you do to me~~

I don't think any protagonist can ever top Wei 'Yiling Laozu' Wuxian. No one is doing it like him. He is an icon. He can shoot arrows blindfolded. He is a prankster. He falls for a boy and decides immediately that he must have said boy's attention on him at all time. He is necromancer exacting his vengeance. He is just three years old. He is a flirt. He has his first kiss in his twenties. He does not remember your name. He does remember that one song his crush sang to him in a cave when he was injured and feverish. He is a sunshine boy. He survived the hell of hells. He died and was unhappily brought back to life. He's the bizarre genius, the miraculous hero, the force of the rebellion, the flower that blooms alone. He walks the single plank bridge alone. He is the awesome gay uncle who knows everything. He is a pretty boy. He is the most moral, steadfast person you know. He is just a man throwing flowers to his love. He rips his hard won talent out to repay a debt that never was. He is a sister's boy. He is an abuse survivor. He is an urban legend. He is one of the most handsome men of his time. He has so much trauma. He plants children like radishes. He threw the arrow he was shot with from a rooftop and killed someone. He is a talented musician. He is a scheming fox. He can drink you under the table. He is so fucking tired of this bullshit. He has probably long since burned his tastebuds with the spice he puts in his food. He is broke. He kisses skeletons on their hands in gratitude. He confesses his deep, abiding love in the middle of being held hostage. He attempts the impossible and succeeds. He is an untamed hero, standing against a world condemning the innocent. He is everything.

How to Finish

I drew this poster for Jon Acuff and his FINISH book tour. Big thanks to Jon for this collaboration, his book has some great ideas about how to complete creative and life goals.

The pain wasn't the issue. Pain was a part of life, part of his training, his willful personality requiring discipline he lacked from the time on his own. The pain was fine, expected if not welcomed, a representation of his acceptance at Lotus Pier. It was a sign of investment from the Jiang: time and resources to shape him into a strong cultivator, a right hand man to Jiang Cheng worthy of their philanthropy when the time came, at the very least not a blemish on their sect lineage.

The issue was that Wei Ying needed to be unconscious. He needed the time spent away, in darkness, left from his body so it could heal while he wasn't there to hinder it. He could feel the tightness of his eyes, bloodshot with too much continuous time here, present, active. He needed his time to be nothing so that tomorrow he could attempt to be something.

A snippet from the fic doc I write in when I feel like shit. 😆

I am physically holding back the urge to post fic content before I am at least most of the way through if not done because I am not leaving another unfinished fic to haunt me at night

shinzawa fic I will come back to you please be patient with me, mxtx has me by the throat

I can delay this gratification. I can. Save the dopamine. It's possible.

(it's wlw wangxian modern au, little bit of foster care a-yuan and other bits 👀)