The Main Problem I Have With Trying To Talk Batman With My Siblings Is That We Have All Seen Batman But

The main problem I have with trying to talk Batman with my siblings is that we have all seen Batman but non of us have seen the same stuff. My younger brother has seen teen titans, my older brother has seen Batman: the animated series and Batman beyond and I’ve seen part of young justice, part of the 2004 the Batman show, Wayne family adventures and way too much fanfic. Even if we all wanna talk about dick Grayson we’re all talking about a different dick or Bruce or whoever. There is no winning.

Invite a friend to come over. Leave your front door unlocked, leave your phone on the table and climb out of your window. When they show up to your place, just sit quietly nearby and observe. See if they try the door. The door is unlocked. If they go in, wait a few minutes. Come home like normal. Act spooked that they're there. Demand to know what the fuck they're doing in your house. Act confused by their claim that you invited them, and point out that your phone was at home this whole time. They could have sent those messages to themselves from your phone to invite themselves over.

It's your word against theirs and you both have the same defense: nobody normal would do that for no reason.

Eight-year-old writes in the to editors about Jason Todd's death

Hanahaki as a fanfic trope is so funny to me. Like op I’m coughing up flowers. If I don’t tell my crush I like them I’ll die! Guess I’ll die

It’s especially funny fics where they are just normal characters

Idk maybe I’m just aroace but how down bad/ afraid of rejection do you have to be to come to that conclusion

Funniest possible stance for Brucie Wayne to publically take is a firmly-rooted belief that Batman doesn't exist.

"I've never once been rescued by this so-called hero and I've been kidnapped 14 times already this year."

"Why would the police summon him with a giant lantern? Wouldn't that make more sense for Mothman?"

"I know what you can do with Photoshop, these doctored pictures can't fool me! Tim's a whiz with photos, have you seen his latest exhibit..?"

"Vigilantism is illegal, you can't do that."

Idk if I’ll ever write this but I love the fics where one of the robins is brought to the future to see the modern fam but often times they don’t get to meet the adult version of themselves so this is what I think that would look like for them.

Let’s put Damian at about 14 here so it’s a fresh from the league, maybe a few months into living with Dick as Batman. He is enraged to find his older self so soft. He wastes his time on pointless things like painting, animals, and video games. (No he is not jealous, he is disgusted by how happy and relaxed he looks in the future, of course)

I imagine Tim’s mini popping up when he’s around his team. Cassie, Bart and Kon can’t stop gushing about how cute the baby Robin is. Red Robin Tim is trying to talk baby Tim out of a panic, because where is Batman? Why isn’t he with him? Who are these teenagers who keep trying to hug him and make comments about his bowl cut? (He can’t believe how self assured his older self is, or how comfortable he is with receiving attention. Or how obviously loved he becomes)

Steph’s Robin sees the spoiler costume and asks if they’re back to working on their own again. Steph smiles sadly and makes the kid a plate of waffles and tells her that she doesn’t need to be one of Bruce’s adoptees to be one of his kids. (She is a part of the family. Tiny Robin Steph is amazed by the confidence she injects into the words. They don’t sound like a mask anymore)

Jason Todd’s Robin finds himself in a dark living room at night. It’s clean and decorated. A little girl walks through holding a cup of water, she can’t be too much younger than he is. Lian sees him and calls for her dad(s- she hasn’t called Jason her dad yet but she considers him her other parent). Once both Jason’s figure out who the other is, both have very different internal monologues. Bitty jay is shocked by how domestic he gets to live, he gets to have a loving family and a home with a big bookcase, warm blankets and a full kitchen. (Older Jason is suddenly terrified because he does not remember being that tiny when he was that age. Lian is a couple years younger and they’re the same size.)

Dick Grayson sees his older self and thinks he went back in time. Why? Because that man looks like his Tati who is dead. It’s a heartbreaking realization for Dick who, despite having pictures of his parents, had no idea he looked so much like John Grayson. (It’s a difficult conversation, to explain to a child who just wants to see their dad one more time that you aren’t him)