Talking Mad Shit About An Article As A Seasoned Alienfucker

Talking mad shit about an article as a seasoned Alienfucker

SO. The article in question is this:

https://reelrundown.com/movies/The-Top-10-Sexiest-Aliens

I’m going to rant about why it was funny to me in a strangely not funny way. Keep in mind this is written out of sheer boredom, this isn’t supposed to be serious, but I’m criticizing this article because I want to and because its actually bullshit.

So basically the list counts as such:

10. Serleena Xath (Men in Black)

9. Queen Tyr’ahnee (Duck Dodgers)

8. Princess Neytiri (Avatar)

7. Aayla Secura (Star Wars)

6. Ella (Cowboys and Aliens)

5. Gamora (Guardians of the Galaxy)

4. Leeloo (The Fifth Element)

3. Caprica Six (Battlestar Galactica)

2. Darth Talon (Star Wars)

1. Sil (Species)

I sorted them out into four distinct categories.

I reckon you can already see why this is funny to me. Because most of their choices. Don’t look like aliens. You can’t make a list of fuckable aliens and list off aliens that look indistinguishable from humans. That just means you like humans

I can excuse Neytiri and Aayla and Talon, Gamora’ and Tyr’ahnee are on thin ice, but c’mon man. Come on man. At least put some actual aliens for the rest.

I dunno, maybe I just don’t understand the Normal Person Gaze (tm) but if you ask people who I feel like this article is for then Venom would be on there without question.

Anyways. Have a good evening.

*gripping beard*

No dude im so excited for the barbie movie im not being ironic im not joking im so fucking excited i wanna go see it right as it comes out dude hear me out please

SOME MORE

Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children

Both of us have seen this before (as seen in my incessant ranting abt a payday au) but regardless it remains a fantastic movie. I am here for Enoch and his weird fucking necromancy. Makes me wanna read the books.

Get Out

It was my partner’s first time seeing this movie; I had seen it when it first came out, and my opinion stays the same; Get Out is one of my favourite unsettling movies purely because of how good the actors are at selling it. Freaks me out <3

Lucy

AAAAAA WHERE DO I START. Oh. Oh my fucking. Oh. Graphic surgery/medical scenes freak me out to no end but it was such a cool ass movie. My stomach hurt the whole time so there’s that. Beautiful visuals and metaphors.

Lightyear

Lightyear managed to do something no other movie has done. It genuinely made me forget that it wasn’t a live-action movie. Not because of the style, the animation is very obviously cartoon-y and stylized, but it’s done like a live-action sci-fi action movie. It made me think a lot about movies like Interstellar and Martian purely because of some of the shots.

More to come :)

General Opinions on Movies me and my partner marathoned recently written before the melatonin wins

Planet of the Apes trilogy

LOVED THEM. SO MUCH. I care a lot about Caesar and Maurice so the end of the third movie really had me in tears. So good.

Jurassic World Movies

Pretty alright, docked some points because of real world opinions of Crisp Rat, but I am HERE for Blue and the T-Rex. The Indominus Rex was, imo, a really cool dino. Fed my childhood love of scaley boys.

Puss in Boots: The Last Wish

YES KING ITS WHAT HE DESERVES. So happy to see Kitty again and Harvey Guillén did a great job. 10/10 will watch again.

The Golden Compass

Lost to the mf ages. I had a preview for this movie on a dvd I had as a kid, and only now got to watch it. So sad there wasn't a sequel.

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

YES. YES. YES. EVERYTHING I WANTED IT TO BE.

All of the Michael Bay Transformers movies

Ugh took us so long to get through cause each movie is a little over 2.5 hours but we made it! I watched the first one as a kid (as well as read some of the comics) and Ive always loved Bumblebee. I loved all of the movies. LOVED HOUND he was my childhood second favourite. Im a little sad that Arcee didn't get nearly as much of a part as she deserves but I'll live. I'm more partial towards Sam Witwicky but Cade Yeager is alright. Hes cool.

Transformers: the Movie (1986)

Partner's childhood favourite so naturally we had to. Was really good! Reminded me of why I love 80's cartoons so much, it was a huge nostalgia trip and got me wanting to watch all of my childhood shows and movies (X-Men, TMNT '87, Rainbow Brite, etc.). I will always love the style and the way they did the backgrounds. As for the movie itself, I got my fill of Arcee, and I'm happy with the experience. Will watch again.

Bayverse TMNT movies.

YES FINALLY. Ive had these on my watch list for. A WHILE. I loved them, loved Mikey and Donnie specifically. Not my favourite iteration of Casey but he was fine. Overall p good, happy to see Bebop and Rocksteady. I think they should've used '87 Krang's voice in the second movie but he's squeaky and kind of annoying so I get it. Reminds me to watch ROTTMNT.

Dinosaur

Literally didnt even know this was a Disney movie but was fantastic. Beautiful animation despite being old. Loved it.

Hook

*Points at Rufio* its him officer. Its the homestuck flashback. Despite the fact that I had to explain why Rufio cause me to uncontrollably laugh to my partner, was a really good movie. Hook and Peter were both played by amazing guys.

I'll add any if I missed them, and I'll reblog with our next batch. :)

Hey guys, I dont wanna do this but here goes.

My power might be getting shut off soon.

I need money to pay for medical bills.

I need money to be able to register my car when I get it finally.

So please, please order a commission if you can, every little bit helps.

Etsy

Butterbear14Art - Etsy

Shop Butterbear14’s Art Commissions! by Butterbear14Art located in Grand Junction, Colorado.

If you want, you can also dm here and we can go over any ideas you have.

The miles

The miles

FIGURED OUT ONE AND IMMEDIATELY FOUND ANOTHER

Horns

This on isn’t as deep at the wings. Horns are meant for one thing; defense. So, I’m looking at it from less of a functional standpoint and more of how I want them to look. I’ve messed with a few designs and I think I’m gonna settle for some ram horns. When in doubt always resort to ram.

Combining all my favourite charcter design traits into one mf, I’ll keep yall updated