Woodstock Is Staring Directly At The Sun, But Never In The Mirror

woodstock is staring directly at the sun, but never in the mirror

9 you want to know better tag :)

three ships: eleanor and chidi (from the good place), finnick and annie (from thg), and sam and mercedes (from glee)

first ship: ella and prince charmont from ella enchanted (og comfort movie)

last song: “kaleidoscope” by chappell roan!!

last movie: deadpool 2 (i’m prepping for the new movie 👀)

currently reading: nothing but i have been on the hunt for don’t want you like a best friend by emma alban to read next!!

currently watching: i’m watching supernatural for the first time (i’m on s12), and i LOVE it

currently eating: homemade chicken and gnocchi soup :)

currently craving: a good loaf of bread i can bite a hunk off of

i don’t really have anyone to tag i don’t have that many mutuals… but feel free to fill it out if you wanna be moots!!

tagged by @themarydragon 🥰

9 people you want to know better tag

Three Ships: Zelink (Zelda/Link, Legend of Zelda), Shirbert (Anne/Gilbert from Anne of Green Gables or Anne With An E) and Locklyle (Lucy/Lockwood from Lockwood and Co)

First Ship: i joined tumblr in 2017 for BoTW Zelink and all of my fandom experience spiralled from here. i started playing LoZ games before that though, maybe 2008? and there was a fanfic tab (though it wasn't called like that) on the help website i used

Last Song: ......... "Last Night - Official Madison Song" by Chris Anderson and DJ Robbie (it's on my summer playlist bc of childhood nostalgia, i don't go out of my way to listen to it usually 😂)

Last Movie: Maze Runner: The Death Cure (justice for Newt)

Currently Reading: book wise, I just finished The Two Towers (and am not so patiently awaiting Return of the King to, well, return to the library so i can borrow it)

Currently Watching: Once Upon A Time (nearly done with S1)

Currently Eating: waiting for my dinner to cook (ratatouille and semolina and eggs)

Currently Craving: CHEESE. my kingdom riches gratitude for a scrap of french cheese!!!!

tagging: @js589 @ohmyoverland @hailqiqi @unnamednarrator @practicallyasleep @cateringfears @applesjuice @redplaidjacket @beckybubbles would love your thoughts on this if that's something you're up to :)

quick kisses and a white lie

gwen stacy x reader

type: tooth-rotting fluff

word count: ~0.6k

warnings: like one dirty joke

summary: stupid peter and his stupid questions and gwen’s stupid time management skills.

a/n: as much as i love peter parker, i LOVE me some gwen stacy

i couldn't help but let a giggle erupt from my lips as i wrapped my arms around gwen.

her brilliant smile graces her face once more. i couldn't help myself. i kissed her face again, and we both let out girl-ish giggles.

"how did i get so lucky to get you as a girlfriend?" i whisper into her hair.

gwen shakes her head, her ponytail swaying with the motion. "moderately lucky, i guess," she says.

i gasp, pulling away from her slightly and smiling down at her. "i have no idea what you're talking about, stacy," i say. "i have the most beautiful-" kiss "-smart-" kiss "-funny-" kiss "-girlfriend in the world-" kiss "-who has the most-" kiss "-wonderful smile!" kiss

her beautiful smile graced her face again, and i kissed her again.

"well, when you put it like that..." gwen says.

i laugh with her again as her hands snake around my neck.

"i'm so glad you're mine," i whisper into her smile.

"i'm so glad you're mine," gwen whispers back.

she tightens her grip on the back of my neck, pulling me towards her lips. i smile, our lips about to touch for what seems like the 100th time today, when—

KNOCK KNOCK

i stand up, stumbling away from gwen and turning towards my door.

"shit shit shit shit shit," i say, smiling to myself and to gwen. she stands up and collects herself, attempting to take her hair that had become slightly wild from my hands running through it.

i do the same while also straightening my clothes. "coming!" i yell.

"so soon," gwen whispers, throwing me a wink.

i gasp, a mix between a laugh and a scoff leaving my lips.

i turn back to the door, shooing gwen to one of the corners out of view of the door before opening the door.

"hey!"

peter.

"hey, parker. what's... how- uh- why are you here?"

peter shrugs. "gwen and i had plans at 4, and it's 5 right now, and i haven't seen her yet."

i didn't know gwen had plans! she always forgets these fucking plans, and now parker is at my door looking for gwen, aka my secret girlfriend hiding in a corner in my fucking room!

"oh, that sucks, i'm sorry," i say, gritting my teeth as i hear the very faint giggles of gwen.

parker shrugs. "yeah. i stopped by her house, and she wasn't there. and i thought since you're always hanging around her..."

"you think i know where she is," i say.

parker nods. "so..."

i shrug. "i... don't..."

the boy nods. "alright."

i'm about to close the door before peter lodges his foot between the wooden door. "look, just tell me the truth. is she here and you're just covering for her?"

"i- uh... well..."

peter chuckles and gazes behind me. "i'll see you at school, gwen!"

he finally moves his foot away and walks away from my room.

i slam the door shut before gwen topples over, bursting out laughing.

"this isn't funny, gwen! i had to lie to peter, and he's a really nice boy!" i scold, walking over to her and slapping her shoulder.

she only laughs even more. "i'm sorry, baby," she finally says after her laughter fit is over. "i forgot. besides, it's so easy to get distracted when i'm with my wonderful girlfriend!"

she wraps her arms around my neck as mine snake around her waist, resting loosely on her hips.

she pulled my into a quick kiss, smiling as she pulls away.

"i'm sorry you had to lie to peter," gwen says, her nose nudging mine.

i sigh. "i forgive you, i guess," i say.

gwen chuckles and presses another kiss to my lips.

"i love you."

"i love you more, stacy."

snoopy def be getting the best sleep ever. i envy him for that.

upon further reflection, i do believe finnick odair would be left shark and would ask annie to be katy perry.

i’m very curious about what you think modern thg characters would dress up as on halloween

heartbreaking, earth shattering, soul crushing. i have never been so invested in a story. i’m liyrrally crying in the school library as we speak. this entire series was so good and so well-executed.

so in conclusion, i am screaming, crying, throwing up, and i will never recover.

two sides of the same coin | finnick odair [final part]

previous part

“no. you can’t stop a fool in love.” hemlock offered calmly. “unless they believe they are not loved in return.”

all for nothing at all.

tags to be found each part.

cw: none.

final part.

everything aches. your heart feels icy in your chest as you sit on the edge of your bed and your teary eyes absorb the green walls. inhaling shakily and exhaling just the same, your cold hands press to your face as you attempt to push away the urge to cry. you didn’t sleep a wink, all you did was cry and scream and destroy more of your room. it’s cruel, it’s unfair – it’s monstrous. you left one dark pit to find finnick and now as you feel the heavy weight of an expensive ring on your ring finger you know you’ll be falling into another pit. permanently. there’s no point in evading or escaping, no point in attempting to escape your fate. maybe it was set the moment you “kissed” finnick, or maybe it was set the moment you began to feel for him. regardless, it’s set.

downstairs you hear finnick call after you after the front door shuts. exhaling shakily and sitting up, you fan your features and tug off the ring. you drop it onto your bed and you stand while looking around the room in destruction and disarray. “i’ll be right there!” you shout as you make your way out of the bedroom into the contrasting corridor of perfection. blinking rapidly and inhaling deeply, your bandaged hand presses to the green walls as you slowly make your way towards the man who’s no doubt trying out what you cooked on the stove and baked in some attempt to gain control of yourself. your eyes screw shut and your jaw sets.

“he won’t let me go without a fight!” you shouted so loud it shook your ribcage.

the cold air hit your skin harshly as you stopped just outside of the hotel doors. hemlock hummed. he stopped on the snow and he slowly turned around. your wide eyes looked at him, mascara stained your cheeks and your hands grasped the card and small velvet box. blood stained the velvet, it stained the white of the card. you shook your head. “he loves me.” you breathed, fog gathered around your lips. “he will fight for me. i can’t–i can’t stop him if he does.” you said tightly as hemlock slowly walked back towards you. his dark gaze held yours.

“no. you can’t stop a fool in love.” hemlock offered calmly. “unless they believe they are not loved in return.”

your heart sank. “he’ll see right through me if i lie.”

hemlock smiled. “oh come now. have some faith in yourself.”

you fold your hands behind your back as you step into the kitchen. your brows twitch and your resolve begins to shake just seeing finnick standing over the pot slurping up the broth you’d made. it smells of delectable foods and seasonings, of finnick – cinnamon and vanilla. for a moment you think you might break, but you can see it. finnick on the ground, dead. mags just a room away. you’d said your goodbye to her the day after the hotel, it’s day three. you have to be in the capitol by the early morning. you’d told her the truth, all she did was hold you. and as you gaze at finnick who turns around and meets you with a crooked smile, you wish you could give him the same.

his smile falters just a bit as he looks you up and down. “hey…” he speaks softly with a small furrow in his brows. setting down the wooden spoon, he walks over to you with a gentle tilt of his head. “you don’t look so good – what’s wrong? you never ask me over this early.” finnick stops in front of you and when he tries to reach out to hold your face, you pull away with furrowing brows and a soft frown. and it feels as if someone’s pushing a blade through your heart, he flinches slightly and he blinks softly. your gaze holds those sea-green eyes.

“two nights ago i met with a regular.” you begin as your hand tightens so tightly behind your back you feel the stitches snapping and opening up beneath white bandages. finnick stands in front of you with an expression of focus, his brows furrowing and lips thinning. you keep your voice steady, bored – you keep the voice you held the first day you spoke to him. as if he’s a stranger and not the man you know yourself to feel for. “i’ve been meeting with him most of the time when I go into the capitol. we’ve talked a lot.” you lie through your teeth and finnick shakes his head gently, blinking softly.

“why are you telling me this?” he asks with confusion. but then his eyes widen slightly and a deep exhale leaves his nostrils. “did he hurt you?” he asks with concern and worry pulling and twisting his features. your insides begin to dry and die, when he steps forward you step back. and you can see the dread that spills into his mind through those pupils.

“he proposed to me.” you plunge the blade into his chest. he flinches and you nod gently, wetting your lips and looking away from his eyes – your gaze looks to the pillar painted a lighter shade of green. an olive. “he’s very important in the capitol. not only can he give me everything i need but when i marry him i can leave everything behind. i don’t need to be in the district–”

“stop.”

“i don’t need to become a mentor.”

“please.”

“and i can forget i was ever even alive outside of the capitol.” your gaze meets his and the blade twists in his chest. finnick’s eyes are wide, they’re glassy. his brows twitch and his lips part with shaky breaths and exhales. you swallow thickly and you hold your fist, you can feel the dampness of the blood through the bandages. it hurts, it’s hot pain but it doesn’t compare to what you’re pulling through. “i said yes.” and you shove the blade in deeper. finnick’s eyes search yours, your jaw sets and you keep your facade. but finnick shakes his head and steps towards you.

“no. no. you’re lying n-none of this can be real.” his voice is tight, it sounds as if his heart has lodged into his throat. you blink softly and your eyes flutter shut as he steps forward. coarse but gentle hands hold your face and he brings your gaze to his as your eyes open. looking up into his sea-green eyes, your hand tightens around the grip of the blade in his chest. “you wouldn’t ever. you–you’re joking, right?” finnick’s voice shakes as your gaze holds his. his thumbs stroke your cheekbones. “i love you a-and i thought–” and with a rough pull away of your face, you scoff as your hand pulls the blade out.

“what?” you offer sharply. “that i loved you?” your brows raise as you let out another sharp scoff. finnick flinches again and you shake your head gently as your brows furrow. “i cared about you but you knew what this was. you were the one that proposed it in the first place, remember?” there’s a bitterness in your tongue, but you worry. you begin to worry as your eyes sting and your stomach twists with sickness while your heart pushes up into your throat. his eyes search yours. “you were a means to an end, odair. and now he will be. with him i can leave all of this behind.”

finnick exhales shakily as tears roll down his tan cheeks. you feel the blood pushing through the bandages and dripping onto your palm that grasps the injury. “why are you doing this?” he breathes out shakily, his brows twitch and his nostrils flare as his adam’s apple bobs in his throat. and your hand grips the blade’s handle yet again. the point presses where his heart has been wounded severely and you shake your head gently.

“because i want to leave all of this behind. it’s all i’ve ever wanted. i don’t want to be stuck forever, under president snow’s thumb with the games tagged on my ear. i refuse to be a sow for the use of those above me.” you plunge the blade into his heart yet again. and your hands begin to tremble. “and you weren’t enough to change that fact.” and you rip the blade out. turning around, you quickly switch the positioning of your hands to fold in front of you as your vision blurs. “now get out.” your voice is tight, tears brim along your waterline as blood drips between your fingers and hits the wooden floorings.

there’s a long silence. then finnick exhales shakily, almost choked. “watching your games – i can remember the last kill that crowned you the victor.” he begins, his voice tight and wavering. “it was a twelve year old from district 12. she begged for her life but you shoved the blade down her throat.” you flinch as you recall the memory your mind seems to have burned out. more tears roll down your cheeks. “i should have known you were heartless then and there.” and you hold your breath, his tone is ice cold – empty. you blink rapidly as more tears spill. it isn’t until the front door slams shut do you fall towards the pillar. blood splatters to the ground and smears on the pillar you grasp.

and now you’re in the pit again.

time moves slowly – agonizingly slowly without finnick. you find a routine, you stick to it, and you put on a face. a facade. finnick hates you, he would forever hate you and you’d never see each other again but at least he’s alive. at least mags is alive. the scent of cinnamon and vanilla sears into your nostrils like copper once was, it never leaves. not while you sleep on expensive sheets with hemlock’s arms around you and his expensive aftershave suffocating you, not while you’re styled and dressed by the best designers by the day, not while you look over a table of enough food to feed an entire district – nothing rids finnick from your body and your senses. nothing. but you manage to find footing in a loveless marriage with a man that is less than a friend but more than a stranger.

especially after the birth of a beautiful boy.

“welcome home, miss.” one of the nannies greets you.

you offer her a soft smile before you look at the three year old in her arms and he reaches out with a big smile, he makes grabby hands at you and giggles loudly. “hello, my lovely boy. did you miss mommy?” you coo sweetly at the baby. with a scrunchy of your nose against his neck he giggles joyfully. you pull back and brush away some of his hair, sea-green eyes glow as they look at you. your eyes flicker to the nanny and you nod gently. “i’ll be in the living room – please bring some of his toys and books.” she offers a nod and bow before she walks off.

softly cooing at the boy, you hold him on your hip and enter the living room with a smile across your lips. his cheeks rosy, dusted in moles and various freckles. you kick off your heels before you step onto the soft carpeting. one of the maids fluffs the pillows, you shoot her a momentary smile before you look back to the boy in your arms. “should i notify the mister that you’re here, miss?” asks the maid with a gentle tilt of her head. you raise your brows gently.

“he’s here?” you question in surprise. she smiles and nods, with a soft frown, you shake your head and put on a smile. “that won’t be necessary. i just want to spend some time with my sweet, sweet boy.” he giggles as you nuzzle your face against his, his arms wrapping around your neck. when the screen suddenly flickers on, your gaze shifts towards the screen. gently rocking with the boy on your hip, your brows furrow as your eyes are met with president snow announcing the 75th anniversary of the defeat of the rebellion. “please turn this off i don’t…” you trail off softly and take notice of the headline. president snow’s voice fills your skull as he reads from cards.

“on this the third quarter quell games. the male and female tributes are to be reaped from the existing pool of victors in each district.”

suddenly, you can’t feel your legs. your eyes widen and your jaw falls slack as your heart drops into the acidic pits of your stomach. “miss?” the maid calls cautiously. your entire body feels cold, it feels numb as your gaze burns into president snow.

“victors will present themselves on reaping day. regardless of age, state of health, or situation.”

falling to your knees, hot tears sting your eyes and everything sounds muffled. the maids' voices of concern, the nanny trying to pull your son out of your arms, hemlock’s footsteps. everything is distant, nothing exists as you feel the weight shift off your hip and you crumble to the carpet. grasping the carpet as your forehead presses into the fabric – you let out a guttural scream that echoes through the room and brings a burst of tears from your son that calls after you. hemlock falls beside you and you thrash as he attempts to hold you.

“no! no! no!” you scream and shout helplessly as apologies leave his lips.

nobody wins the games.

nobody.

taglist:

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