I Know He's Not The One But What If No One Ever Cares About Me Like He Does?

i know he's not the one but what if no one ever cares about me like he does?

bhai sab badiya toh tha ikdam se crippling self esteem ne hit kyu kar diya

this pretty much sums up my life

i enjoy the simple things in life like sleeping, daydreaming, ignoring reality, listening to music, being delusional, recklessly spending my cash, being a disappointment to my family and eating fruits

the act of offering someone the most random thing to make them happy is so wonderful. going the wrong way on your way to them to pluck some flowers and watch their face light up as they realize its for them and mumble a surprised, "oh, thank you!" is lovely. even if it lasts only a second, even if you find that flower on the ground two hours later. that one flash of happiness, and knowing it was because of you makes the day worth living.

and i hate it

what they don't tell you about maladaptive daydreaming is that every once in a while when you're imagining a convo with some therapist or your best friend or someone you care about to comfort yourself and it's working wonderfully, you get the soul crushing realization that you're alone. the words your imaginary people said were nothing more than what you wanted someone to say to you. you've been pacing round your room saying what you wanted to hear to your own self because you have no one who'll say them to you as you're crying into their chest.