They're Part Of A Well-balanced Breakfast

they're part of a well-balanced breakfast

Dp x Dc au: Normal is Good

Okay so hear me out— i see lots of “you can’t control Danny he’s a wild child” premises and like, I agree, I love that, but JUST hear me out. Danny who is just entranced by being treated like a NORMAL KID.

I think for best results this should be done with de-aged Danny so he’s a bit younger, but it can def work with regular Danny too.

Danny winds up running around Gotham for one reason or another doing INSANE SHIT to try and help or just survive and his family is out of the way. The explosion, Bad Fentons, etc— and one of the bats picks up Danny. This can be a dad!Jason, or dad!Dick, or classic Bruce Adoption. But they see this little shit running around and are like “no fucking way, not on my watch you little maniac”

Now, a lot of people use the “Jazz practically raised Danny” card, and I love that card and fully support it, but she was also a kid. With no other parents to consult. Who was raised by the Fentons originally and def has no clue what normal parents are like. So she probably didn’t exactly measure up to how a kid is MEANT to be raised. So Danny still had an incredibly strange childhood that just was Not Normal, but I feel like we see Danny with a deep desire to be normal. He doesn’t even really like being a superhero that much, he just wanted to be a kid.

So he gets bat adopted, and Danny is just functioning how he did growing up with the Fentons, which is No Restrictions Do What You Want. And then his bat dad (using Jason for this) is like “No. It’s Bed Time.” And Danny. Danny is ALL for that. He’s bewildered. Mystified. He’s not grumpy about being told what to do at ALL, because he’s just so shocked.

“You’re serious? You’re fucking dead-ass serious? It’s bed time? Oh my god this is so cool. I’ve never had a bed time before! This is great!” Because this is the first time he’s EVER been treated like a normal child by a parental figure. He just got sent to bed. Wow.

Having a parent who is in charge of keeping him healthy and actually enforces Danny taking care of himself is kind of cool.

“Eat your vegetables, they’re good for you.” And they won’t try to eat him back? Fuck yeah, he’ll eat his vegetables!

“No you aren’t allowed to go out at 2 in the morning, go back to bed, you have a doctors appointment for your yearly checkup tomorrow.” oh ancients, Danny has always heard other kids complain about not being allowed out at night, but to have himself told he can’t? This is so weird. And he’s never been to a yearly check up before!

“Brush your teeth before bed” “I can’t get cavities, I’m dead!” “Ya know, for some reason I don’t believe you. When was the last time you went to the dentist? Are you sure you can’t get them?” Danny has 7 cavities.

The first time Danny gets to actually use the “my dad said No” excuse, he is ECSTATIC. Jack and Maddie have LITERALLY never told him he can’t go out somewhere. Ever. He’s in a whole new world where he doesn’t have to fight ghosts, or be a hero, or anything and he loves it. He has a normal kids room without deadly weapons in it and normal kid hobbies and a fridge full of normal food and a parent who enforces a bed time, and it’s weird as hell and it’s great. Normal is pretty damn good, he has no clue what Sam and Tucker were always complaining about. Shits sweet.

Meanwhile on the ENG TWST Ch 7 update…

Crowley: Everyone stop Draconia at once!! *chucks entire cast into battle without any consent whatsoever*

Inky’s team vs pre-Overblot Malleus:

UMMMMM SIR

gender neutral reader

“Goodnight!” You shouted down the hallway before you shut your door, unable to not smile after you heard the muffled replies of the brothers shouting back to you.

Climbing into bed had never been a difficult task and today it was no different. With you safe under your covers and your phone to distract you, you were perfectly content.

But, then, of course,  Mammon came marching in as he had always done since your first week here. However, you had grown so used to this that it no longer disrupted the peace anymore.

So, you ignored him and simply lifted up the covers for him to slide into.

After a few minutes of DevilTok, you threw your phone onto your nightstand and covered yourself up with your blanket. You were finally ready to sleep.

Mammon curled closer, his face hidden in the blanket over your stomach. You smoothed his hair down, smiling at how he only pressed closer at the touch.

Your door creaked open. You raised your head but you were unable to tell who it was. They settled on the side opposite of where Mammon had gotten in and rubbed your shoulder gently instead of saying anything.

The lamp turned on. It was Satan. You rolled onto your stomach, trying to shield your eyes from the light. Mammon grumbled, annoyed that he could no longer hide his face in your body comfortably.

Your door once again creaked open. You groaned.

Another weight to the bed. Someone had decided to lay on your back. Four people in your bed was too unusual. You peeked an eye open.

Mammon was baring his teeth like a feral animal at whoever was on top of you. You would bet a thousand Grimm that it was Belphie.

You looked to your right. Satan wasn’t even reading his book and was instead looking at you.

You rolled your eyes. You knew what was happening. Your demons had once again came to the conclusion that you were human with a human lifespan.

You decided to just let them angst this one out.

The door opened and this time, two pairs of footsteps wondered to your bed. “Sorry, hun,” Asmo whispered as he crawled over you and Mammon. “Wanted to see you.”

“Uh huh…” Levi took his spot on the outside of your legs, your left calf acting as a cushion for his head. You prayed that you wouldn’t accidentally kick him in your sleep.

Then you heard the crunching of chips and a crinkle of a bag. You hadn’t even noticed him walk in.

You moaned into your pillow, exhausted beyond belief. “Beel, please stop eating. I know it sucks to be told that, but go outside if you’re going to crunch.”

There was an incoherent reply and then silence. The edge of the mattress dipped down. Satan turned his lamp off.

You worked on ignoring all of them, closing your eyes tightly and hoping for the best. Asmo dragged his manicured nails up and down your arm and it pulled you into a sleepy haze. You hummed out your appreciation and Asmo giggled tiredly in response.

You felt yourself rocking in and out of sleep, even drooling with how at peace you were. Maybe it wasn’t so bad having six demons in bed with you. Maybe it was worth it for this amount of comfort.

And then your door slammed open.

“Get out of their room, now.” A deadly aura made you choke on air, shivering violently. Lucifer was in his demon form and livid.

Belphie jolted awake on your back, making you gasp in pain as his elbows and knees dug into you. Mammon reacted, scrambling to pull you out from under him.

“Mammon,” Belphie growled, easing his weight back down onto you. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“What do ya think YOU’RE doing?!” Mammon huffed, irritated. “You’re hurtin’ ‘em!”

“They’re fine. They can handle it.” He patted you on the head. How were they ignoring Lucifer? You shifted warily under his weight, unable to see anything happening.

Lucifer started stomping over. You shrunk under Belphie, trying to hide.

“Who do you two think you are, ignoring me?” Lucifer loomed over you three, Levi rolling away to avoid confrontation. “You will all go to your own rooms immediately. The rest of you as well.”

“Lucifer!” Asmodeus whined, leaning into a dozing Beelzebub’s side. “Why can’t we stay? What’s the harm?”

“They were just about to sleep but someone decided to wake them back up,” Satan glowered up at Lucifer. “I think you should be the one to leave.”

“Oh my god, Lucifer just let them stay.” You took matters into your own hands, rubbing at your face tiredly. You wanted no more arguing tonight. “Thanks, but if I didn’t want them here I would’ve gotten rid of them long ago myself. Stay or leave, I don’t care just please turn off the lights.”

He walked away and flipped the switch, darkness fortunately covering the entire room once again. You relaxed and felt Belphie nuzzle into the nape of your neck.

You heard a chair being dragged on your wooden floor and then Lucifer sitting down. You rolled your eyes. Of course he would choose to stay but not be in the bed.

Now, with everything and everyone finally settled in for the night, you got to thinking.

How could all of them be upset over the same thing at once? You think quietly as you can in your bed filled with eight people and come to a damning conclusion. One that makes your stomach twist painfully.

“You had a family movie night without me, didn’t you? And it had someone dying long before someone else, didn’t it?” The sound of breathing stops, seven pairs of eyes stare at you, all conveying different degrees of guilt. “What the hell?”

Percy’s New Yorker genes unlocking the moment someone cuts him off and sending him into a fit of 12yo road rage

Belphegor: Any last words?

MC: You're the ugly twin.