Innocence Part 2

Innocence Part 2

Pairing: Neteyam x fem!Metkayina reader. Reader is 18, Neteyam is aged up to 19. Part 3 in the works. 

Summary:  You’re the youngest daughter of Tonowari and are very sheltered and innocent. After you’re punished for sneaking away with Neteyam, you worry about when you’ll see him next. 

Warnings: Angry parents, mature themes, size kink, fingering, slight dacryphillia, awkwardness? I’m not really sure how to write warnings but there you go.  Please keep in mind I have 0 experience writing the scenes at all, so they may be super awkward. I apologize in advance. 

word count: 9,593 

Notes: I tried getting this out asap, so there may be some grammatical or spelling errors. I tried to tag as many people as I could, so I’m very sorry if i missed you! Once again, I want to thank all of you for the amazing response to part 2!!! I really, really hope this lives up to your expectations and is as good as the first part :) Also, I use a dictionary I found online for most Na’vi words, but they don’t have a word for punishment, so I used the French word for revenge. 

As the ilu came around the bend, finally nearing Awa’atlu, you felt your stomach drop. You could see the red glow of the torches from here, surprised to see so many of your clan out this late. They should have been at home eating or sleeping, not out here searching for you. 

“Oh Great Mother,” You groaned. “The whole village is still awake.” 

Neteyam stopped the animal in the shallow water just outside the village. The two of you reluctantly dismounted. You brushed the hair out of your face as you stood from the water, and started towards the village. A hand grabbed your arm, stopping your movements.  

“Y/n, look at me.” Neteyam tugged you around to face him, his hand coming to hold your cheek. “No matter what happens tonight, we will be okay. They might try to punish me, they might try to keep you from me, but I will come back to you as many times as I have to.” 

He hoped you could tell how serious he was. He had never felt this way about anyone, and Neteyam could only pray that you felt the same. “I know that Eywa has fated us to meet,” He placed his hand on your chest, over the space where your heart beat. “I can feel it, here.” He tapped the spot, drawing a short, dry laugh from you. 

He pulled you into his arms for a tight hug, arms around your neck. You instinctively melted into his embrace, wrapping your own arms around his body and pressing your head to his chest. Having Neteyam’s arms around you made you feel safe, cherished. He was so gentle with you, holding you like he thought you were going to float away if he let go.

“Y/n?” Your sister’s voice brought you back down to earth. You quickly pulled away from Neteyam, turning to face her. 

She rushed over to you and yanked you into a hug. “Where have you been? We have been looking for you everywhere.” Her voice was relieved, glad you were home safe. Tsireya pulled back a bit and her gaze shot towards the Omatikaya boy standing stiffly behind you. “What are you doing with him?” She was confused, eyebrows furrowed as she looked to you for answers.

“Are you okay?” She asked, voice dropping to a low whisper.   

You thought about lying to her, but Tsireya was the one person you had never been able to keep secrets from. She would see through any story you tried to tell her. Instead, you reached for her hand and attempted to explain yourself. “Sister, it is not what you think. You know mom and dad never let me do anything, and I knew if I asked to leave they would say no….” You trailed off, giving her a meek smile.

“He’s my friend.” 

Tsireya was relieved that nothing terrible had happened. However, she knew how trusting you could be; You never questioned other people’s intentions, choosing to only see the best in them. She worried that he had taken advantage of you. 

“Have you mated with him?” Her question was aimed at you but her eyes were focused wearily on Neteyam.

The man in question was quick to defend your honor. “No! We have done nothing like that.”

You felt your ears begin to warm. You didn’t think you guys had done anything bad, but your activities early had felt special, private, and…kind of dirty.

But you knew, or rather you thought you knew, that mating was the forming of tsaheylu, which you guys hadn’t done. So you hastily agreed with Neteyam.

Your sister’s eyes widened as she looked between the two of you, inspecting the red hue on your ears and the sheepish look on Neteyam’s face.

“But you did something, didn’t you?” You assumed she was referring to the way Neteyam had touched you earlier, and you remembered him briefly mentioning “potential mates.” Did she mean to ask if you kissed? This whole process was confusing, and you made a mental note to ask her later. 

Keep reading

dazzling haze, mysterious way

(eren x female reader)

college au; enemies to lovers

wc: 7k+

warnings: cursing, suggestive if you squint really hard

a/n: i have no excuses for this madness, please know i am embarrassed. considering writing a part 2 if you enjoy!

Things being back home for the holidays usually means:

a) indulging in your dad’s creamy homemade hot cocoa, b) having at least one christmas movie night with Christa, c) spending half of said christmas movie night repeatedly asking Christa to put her phone down (she can text her girlfriend after Juliet answers the doorbell to find Mark carrying a boombox playing a christmas carol and large cue cards), d) getting some well deserved rest after a decent finals week

Things being back home for the holidays doesn’t usually mean:

a) forgetting your favorite sweater at your dorm like a dumbass, b) finding out your dad fell prey of food poisoning, c) having to threaten to throw your brother’s nintendo switch out the window if he doesn’t stop smoking in his room, d) being so short on money you’re forced to look for babysitting jobs to roll out the slim earnings you get from working as a tutor on campus

So here you are, buried in a gigantic white puffer jacket and handmade scarf, backpack heavy with books, DVDs, craft supplies. Here you are, ringing the doorbell of one of the fanciest houses of the entire, affluent neighborhood you’ve been directed to by the woman who had called you yesterday. You sincerely hope you didn’t get off the bus too early nor too late, as this is not really a part of your hometown you’re familiar with.

You are, however, fairly familiar with the 5’12 broad chested green eyed cable knit sweater and pajama bottoms wearing figure opening the door.

“Thanks, we don’t need anything” he says, gaze flickering over your outfit, only one second spent wondering where you could possibly be hiding a vacuum cleaner.

Does he really not recognize you? Is it the scarf or is he actually that much of an idiot?

“Does Gabi live here?” you ask, unimpressed.

His eyebrows raise in interest.

“She isn’t old enough to buy anything”

“Eren, I’m here to babysit” it feels so weird to say his name out loud to someone that isn't Mikasa or Christa. It’s weird to call him by his name while he’s there to actually hear it.

“Do I know you?” his gaze narrows, gears in his head working exceptionally hard to try and remember a face that simply isn’t familiar enough for him to pinpoint.

You sigh.

“Isn’t your mom here? She asked me to come today and has already paid in advance. I can leave but—”

He finally opens the door fully, a gust of wind makes him shiver and it finally dawns on him that it’d probably be rude to let you freeze on his doorstep.

“Come in, I’ll call her” he moves to the side and you accept the invitation with relief, hands ice cold even if buried inside your pockets.

The house is warm, smells nice and you can hear that the tv is on in the living room. You stay by the door, watch as he heads to what you can only guess is the kitchen and comes out shortly after, phone squeezed between his cheek and shoulder as he removes the hair band sitting around his wrist with his teeth.

“Hey mom” you do your best not to stare as he ties his hair back and the sweater rises up slightly, revealing part of an annoyingly toned stomach “yeah, ‘m fine. Someone’s here, she says it’s to babysit Gabi?”

However, you are staring. Which explains why you slightly jump when his gaze is suddenly on you again as he hums, listening to whatever explanation his mom is giving him.

“Ah, right. She says you already paid?”

“I can leave and send the money back” you take a small step forward but Eren motions you to keep quiet with a raise of his pointer finger.

“Okay, I got it. Yes, I’ll tell her. Thanks, you too, tell dad I said hi” he smiles softly before ending the call and shoving the phone in his pocket.

“It’s honestly my fault, I came back one day earlier than expected. She’s embarrassed and so sorry and will call you later to apologize”

“It’s really no problem, I’ll just send the payment back” you’re already with one hand on the door handle, hoping to god the next bus will come within an hour, when his fingers delicately close around your wrist.

“Don’t be ridiculous. You can stay”

“There’s no need, just take the money and I’ll be on my way”

Eren suddenly furrows his brows for a second, then his hand reaches over to your scarf and gently pulls it down enough to reveal the entirety of your nose and mouth.

“Ah, you’re the tutor girl. Thought I recognized that polemic tone” and now you finally find him more familiar as well, with that snarky smirk and teasing gaze.

“I wouldn’t need to be polemic if you actually cooperated for once in your life”

He brings both hands to his chest, a fake grimace distorting his features.

“Ouch. Still can’t believe Armin describes you as pleasant to be around”

You click your tongue in annoyance.

“Likewise. I’ll send the money back when I get home” you grumble, turning around to open the door once again. It sucks, cause you need it and your house is half an hour away and it’s 28.4 °F outside, but it’s the right thing to do.

“Hey, listen” Eren doesn’t grab your wrist a second time, his hand reaches the door handle instead. In an attempt to keep it shut, he’s basically hovering above you, an invasion of your personal space so sudden you barely have the time to register that he smells sickeningly nice. Way better than you have anticipated, given that he usually looks like someone who showers once a month and even then refuses to wash his legs cause water and soap rinse down on them anyway.

“She has homework, some kind of project to do. I’m too tired to deal with it, just do the job so you can keep the money and I can keep watching house of the dragon”

“Who is that? ” a high pitched voice asks, making you jump. Eren’s infamous smirk appears once again as he leans forward even more to whisper a good luck though, she’s a pain in the ass right to the shell of your ear. The shudder is a perfectly normal, balanced reaction that you hope to fuck he doesn’t notice.

“She’s your new mom, Gab! Mine finally decided I’m the only one worth keeping around, so she’s given you up for adoption, again” he finally pulls back and winks at his sister, who returns him an unimpressed look.

“Hi, Gabi, it’s so nice to meet you. I’m just gonna be here for a few hours to keep you company” you take off your scarf and attempt a smile. The petite, young girl staring back at you seems offended.

“I don’t need a babysitter, I’m twelve”

God, she really is his sister. The medium length black hair half tied above her head with large strands framing each side of a very skeptical face is the same as his, only darker.

“Have fun” Eren grins, patting your shoulder once before disappearing into the living room once again.

You clear your throat and kneel down to place your backpack on the floor, unzipping your jacket in an effort to stop sweating. What do they have in the house, radiators buried in the damn walls? 

“I’m not here to babysit” you smile again “I won’t even bother you if you don’t want me to. Just thought I could give you a hand to finish whatever schoolwork you may have, so you can enjoy the rest of the holidays doing whatever you like”

Gabi weights down her options, studying you for a few moments. She knows she’s gonna have to do her homework anyway, sooner or later, so if this stranger suddenly appearing at her house is going to be there regardless, she might as well be of use.

“Whaddya have in there?” she suspiciously eyes your backpack and you zip it open to give her free peeking access. Gabi kneels on the carpet as well, snooping around the content of the indigo eastpak. “These movies are lame” she grumbles, holding one of the DVDs in between her pointer and middle finger.

You fake a gasp.

“Hey! I’ll have you know that Balto is an all time classic” you grumble back, taking the DVD back. Gabi fights the smile already tugging at her lips. She usually likes adults who talk to her as if she’s one of them, and you seem kinda fun. But it’s too early to let you know.

“What’s the crafting stuff for? I’m not three” she bites again, standing up with her arms crossed. You shrug.

“Those are for me, in case I get bored. I create killer notebooks from scratch, sometimes a pinwheel or two if I feel inspired enough” you casually wink, finally taking off your jacket and hanging it by the door, over your scarf.

“So, I guess, if you don’t want my help I may as well go craft myself something” you dramatically sigh, throwing your backpack over one shoulder and starting to march towards the living room.

“Actually, I kinda have a project for school” she mumbles under her breath, still loud enough for you to hear.

“Oh?” you turn around, brows raised.

“I have to make a snow globe and associate a story with it”

“D’you think I could help with that?”

She casually scratches her nose, shifting her weight from one leg to the other.

“Okay”

“How did you even manage to fit all that in one backpack?” Gabi eyes the materials scattered on the kitchen table, appalled. There’s paint, fake snow, fishing line, brushes, some small wooden decorations, ribbons, a glue gun.

“I have my ways” you chuckle “do you have everything we need?”

“I guess” she sounds skeptical, your favorite emotion to work with.

“Great! Let’s wash the container first, use warm soapy water and scrub well”

“Aren’t you supposed to do that?”

“Nope” you pop the p “you’re the one in charge, remember?”

She snorts but heads to the sink anyway, to do as instructed. You wait at the table, foot tapping lightly on the polished parquet floor. When she comes back and sits next to you, you can tell that she’s holding back some curiosity about how the whole thing is going to turn out.

“Wanna pick the decorations we’re going to use?” you smile, pushing the small wooden figures towards her “I have stars, trees, a truck, a bear, I think that’s a reindeer and, well, a slightly crooked snowman”

Gabi takes the decorations in her hands one by one, carefully inspecting each of them, pensive. The crests forming on her forehead as she focuses remind you of the exact same ones Eren gets when trying to understand how to solve a problem sheet.

“Let’s use the stars, the trees and the crooked snowman. We could give him a nice story”

“Sounds good to me. Wanna do the honors?” you ask, handing her a brush.

“I get to paint them?” her voice comes out slightly squeaky, coated with genuine excitement and, as you nod, she finally rewards you with a big, warm smile.

With your chin resting in the palm of your hand, you fondly watch as she focuses on making the stars, the trees and the snowman come alive with gentle strokes of color. She’s pretty talented and gets into it soon, asking for your opinion from time to time. As soon as she’s finished with the stars, you cut two pieces of fishing line and glue the stars onto one end. Then you take the other end and glue it to the inside of the lid, letting the stars dangle downward. This earns you a wow, you’re actually good at this stuff.

Time passes comfortably as you continue to work on the little project. You help Gabi glue the red ribbon around the (now painted green) lid, adding some twine to keep it in place. She fills the inside of the container with the fake snow and insists on getting some pink glitter from her room to give the snow more character. Lastly, she carefully glues down the decorations in the container, places the lid on top and snaps it closed.

When Eren steps into the kitchen, almost two hours later, he briefly stops to take in the view of you two bent over the messiest table he’s ever seen, paper sheets and colored pencils scattered everywhere as you confabulate in soft whispers occasionally interrupted by genuine giggles. He doesn’t remember seeing his little sister giggle with a stranger, like, ever.

“What’re you doing?” he inquires, finally bringing himself to interrupt the magical exchange he’s witnessing. You both look up as he approaches the table and Gabi proudly indicates your work of art.

“We made a snow globe!” she announces.

“Did you, now?” Eren fails to hold back a smile as he takes a look, carefully twisting the container in his hands.

“And we’re giving the snowman a story” Gabi grins, handing him one of the sheets on which she has drawn a scene from the tale you’re both trying to come up with.

His gaze flickers on you, amused, as if waiting for you to add something.

“His name’s Holly” your smile is uncharacteristically sheepish as you take back the page from his hands, accidentally grazing his fingers.

“Holly Berry” Gabi clarifies, which causes another sudden fit of laughter Eren can’t help but feel dragged into. He doesn’t really understand why or how he ends up sitting at the table as well, examining each drawing and handwritten paragraph you have produced. He can’t pinpoint the exact moment he starts coming up with ideas for the plot himself, suggesting that Holly Berry was actually a human raised in a village of snowmen for so long he eventually turned into one, although slightly imperfect, thus not always treated kindly by his fellow villagers. Eren Yeager actually takes a pencil in his hand and starts sketching drawings of gingerbread houses, candy cane forests and lakes of ribbon candies. He gives Holly Berry a human face and is offended by the way you steal the pencil from in between his fingers, mumbling that those features resemble more a potato than a human being. And yet he isn’t offended for long, because you reach across the table to fix the sketch with decisive and unforgiving strokes, but he can smell your shampoo and feel the warmth radiating from your face on his, so he has to lean forward just a tiny bit more.

“It does look better like this”, he concedes. The slight gruffness punctuating his words makes you look up and pull back to your chair immediately, in what definitely isn’t a suave motion. You know how attractive he is, because you’re not blind nor an idiot, although you’ve never been this close to him. He appears to reach a whole new level of attractiveness when his features are relaxed, cheeks slightly dusted with pink, eyes focused on whatever his skilled hands are tracing on a page. What makes it worse, is that he clearly knows. Which is not a bad thing per se, but just adds perfectly to that asshole attitude of his.

You know Eren Yeager because he’s like a celebrity. Best player of the Trost University men’s basketball team, decent grades, a party thrower that usually spends said parties sitting in a corner making out with hot girls, part of a large, loud group of friends, doesn’t smile much in public, usually dresses in black. You’ve seen him around campus for so long and yet only got to talk to him once, because of Armin, who works as a tutor as well. One afternoon, Eren had suddenly decided to barge in your friendly study session, annoyingly talking over and over and over again about trivial matters, not even acknowleding your presence until you asked him if he was aware of the interruption he was causing.

“Sorry, you are?”

“This is y/n, we tutor students together”, Armin cleared his throat, uncomfortable, apologetic gaze finding your annoyed one.

Eren had barely spared you a glance and a slight nod.

“’Kay, well, can’t you leave early today? Jean’s being a massive pain in my ass about tonight’s party and-”

“He can’t leave early, we’re busy”, you cut him off impatiently, pencil drumming on the textbook page opened in front of you.

He looked at you like he couldn’t believe you were still there.

“Listen, this kinda doesn’t concern you so can you give us a sec?”

Armin sighed as you put down the pencil in disbelief.

“No, I can’t give you a sec. I’m waiting for you to leave so we can resume a work that kinda doesn’t concern you”

With his eyebrow muscle contracting involuntarily in a twitch, Eren suddenly slammed his backpack onto the table, pulled out two thick textbooks, a notebook, one pencil, and stared at you with a challenging look in his sage gaze.

“It does now. I need help with this assignment”

Armin rolled his eyes as you pursed your lips, incredulous at such nerve.

“D’you think this is some sort of game?”

“Nah, a game would require you to remove that stick up your ass”

“Eren!”, Armin elbowed him in the arm, cheeks burning from an embarrassment that shouldn’t have been his.

So, in both your mind and conversations with friends, he became asshole, drunk on self-confidence, narcissistic Eren Yeager. Someone should’ve told him that being hot doesn’t give you a free card to also be a cocky fucker, so you simply won’t allow to whatever magic he works on everyone else to affect you as well. Even if his smile is warm as he jokingly throws a crumpled up piece of paper to his little sister, even if that dishevelled bun gives him a laid back look you can’t help but feel drawn to because it’s real, void of his usual, arrogant nonchalance.

“I’m kinda hungry” Gabi says after a while.

Eren glances at the clock hanging over the counter.

“Well, dad’s conference’s gonna last at least two more hours. Whatcha feel like eating? Grilled cheese?”

Her nose scrunches up in a disgusted but cute grimace.

“I’d like real food”

“Didn’t know bread and cheese were considered abstract food”

You can’t help but chuckle at the exchange and, as they both direct their gazes at you, an idea pops in your head.

“I could make noodles?”

Gabi perks up noticeably.

“Sure, we should have some instant noodles somewhere”, Eren gets up and walks towards the stove to start checking in drawers and cupboards. You get up as well, gently pushing him aside to grab a cutting board and carefully select what you need from the spices and sauces shelf: curry, cumin, white pepper, soy sauce. He looks at you, appalled, which makes you laugh again.

“I mean, I can make them from scratch if you don’t mind me messin' up your kitchen a bit. It’s healthier” you suggest with a shrug.

“Yes please!” Gabi cheers as her brother rolls his eyes at the enthusiasm. How on fuck did you manage to make her warm up to you that much in such a short time?

“I feel like you don’t get paid enough for this” he mumbles, to which you scoff.

“Don’t be ridiculous, it’s nothing. Gabi, why don’t you keep working in the living room? I’ll have to set the table” you turn around to glance at her and she gets up right away, diligently collecting everything she needs in her little arms. Eren waits until she’s out of the room to lean on the counter, arms crossed as he follows your every movement around the kitchen.

“Can you stop staring?” you ask, focused on emptying a generous amount of sesame oil in a non-stick frying pan.

“Why, do I make you nervous?”

“If you’re asking whether your presence is bothersome, the answer’s yes”

An amused smile tugs at his lips as he watches you cut a red onion into thin wedges and then add them to the pan while softly humming.

“Didn’t know we’re from the same town” Eren finds it only slightly annoying that you’re being such a sealed box to him. He’s seen the warmth you have so effortlessly unleashed on his sister and can now find it less astonishing, the fact that his best friend likes spending time with you.

You snort as you keep cutting other ingredients: mangetout, some baby park choi, three spring onions, baby corn. You’re good at it, even if you’re so fast his eyes can’t help but nervously flicker from your face to your fingers, tense at the idea that you migth cut off one of your digits. In his kitchen.

“Can you even remember my name?” the question is dripping with sarcasm but your hands are forced to come to a halt when he mutters it without hesitation. He finds pleasure in proving you wrong, in witnessing the way your shoulders had slightly jumped up in surprise. And you feel brain stuck on how his lips must’ve wrapped around your name, making it sound so much better than what you’re used to. It’s just a name and he’s just a guy, what kinda freaky black magic is he working?

“My sister likes you” as much as it’s fun to tease, he finds he enjoys seeing you at ease, relaxed enough to spend an entire afternoon giggling with a twelve year old and actually enjoying it. It works, because you instantly offer a gentle smile as you crush a large garlic clove with the pressure of your palm on the knife you’ve been using.

“I like her, too. It’s scary how clever she is”

“Runs in the family”

To his surpise, you can’t help but let out an airy laugh. It’s authentic, definitely not coated with snark, and he likes it. How many more times could he make you laugh like that again, he wonders?

“Can you pass me some udon noodles?” you ask after a few minutes of comfortable silence. By now everything you’re frying in that pan looks and smells delicious, the curry powder and soy sauce have given all ingredients a golden brown appearence that makes his stomach rumble. As you add some previously heated water to the pan, you can hear Eren opening drawer after drawer, until the distinct sound of plastic being ripped open makes you think he’s found what he’s looking for. You don’t have the time to turn around and reach out to grab the pack of noodles from his hand because he’s already right behind you, so close his chest actually presses to your back for a second as he reaches over to pour the noodles in the pan himself, his other hand casually gripping the counter inches away from your hip. The proximity is unexpected, shocking and pleasantly warm, so you swallow and clench the handle of the wooden spoon you’re using to stir the ingredients.

“Set the table, please” the strangled way words come out makes it sound as if you’re begging, which would usually entertain him but for some reason he can’t bring himself to find it funny, the way you’re luring him in. In fact, the whole situation is so far from being funny, he has to force his body to move away from yours and towards the cabinet where his mom keeps the plates, because what would become of him if you sensed he was on the verge of getting fucking hard from the domesticity of it all? For someone he’s never even actually talked to, no less. What kinda fucked up witchcraft were you practicing? And what on earth did you even use to wash your hair?

It’s soft, the way you call Gabi once the food is ready and it’s playful, the way you urge her to turn around and go wash her hands first, as she dramatically sighs but complies nevertheless. Against all odds where odds = vegetables, she ends up devouring two servings of what, he has to admit, is the best yaki udon he’s ever had. You’re barely picking at your small portion, too busy making sure Gabi eats all she wants.

By the end of a dinner mostly spent coming up with more story options for Holly Berry and giving patient answers to the hundreds questions Gabi has directed your way (Eren now knows your favorite color is turquoise, your younger brother’s name, what you’re going to give Christa as a christmas gift, when your birthday is, which exam took you the longest to study for) he has to insist both of you leave the dishes to him and go finish Holly’s story. You protest—it’s his house and you’re being paid to work—but he simply motions Gabi to drag you away and she surely complies, her small hand closing around yours to not so gently guide you out of the kitchen.

It’s hard not to marvel at the Yeagers’ living room, fire crackling in the wreath covered white marble fireplace beneath the 80+ inch tv mounted to the wall. In the corner stands a second christmas tree (they have one by the kitchen door as well), twice as high, glistening with golden and silver decorations, red ribbons sitting on alternated branches. The big, sectional sofa is covered in what’s probably soft leather and curled up on it is a snoozing tabby cat. Gabi drags you to the right side of the gigantic room, where a bigger, more elegant table stands in front of a gorgeous library with egg-crate shelves filled with books, finely framed family pictures, candles and white Chinese vases decorated with blue patterns made of dragons, clouds, tree branches filled with tiny flowers.

Of course Gabi has made a mess of the table but you smile as you sit, closer this time, letting her fill you up with the latest details she’s come up with for the now almost ten pages long story. She asks you to produce a few more sketches as she focuses on writing the big conclusion and you abide, the snow globe you have both created sitting in your periphereal view right next to your left arm.

“Are you gonna come over again?” she asks without looking up from the snow covered village she’s coloring in.

“If I’m needed and you don’t mind, sure” you smile, not looking at her either.

“What will we do if I don’t have any other schoolwork?”

“We could bake, start a puzzle, come up with another story to fill one of my killer notebooks in. Whatever you’d like”

This time she does look up to meet your gaze and you’re surprised to see the blush blossoming on her cheeks.

“Next time I could show you my room” she suggests while twisting an orange colored pencil in her hand.

“I’d love that” you smile again and she relaxes on the chair, acknowledging your reply with a slight nod.

Fifteen minutes later, you’re done. The story is complete (Holly eventually turns back into a human but decides not to leave the village he grew up in, to protect his friends and make sure his family of snowmen never melts) and the drawings are a wonderful addition to a heartwarming tale you’re sure her teacher is going to appreciate. You get up and help her tidy up the mess scattered across the table. As paper sheets are neatly piled, glitter pens are reunited with their caps as colored pencils with their box and the table is cleared of colorful shavings, Eren returns from the kitchen with hands buried in the pockets of his pajama bottoms and a fond smile tugging at his lips.

“So? How does Holly’s story end?” he asks, not once looking away from you.

“You’ll have to read it to find out” is the playful reply he gets and Eren crosses his heart that he will, in fact, read Holly Berry’s story. It’s only fair.

“I have to go now” you smile down at Gabi “I’ve had so much fun today, thank you for trusting me with your project”

She opens her mouth in a disappointed expression, hand reaching up to grab your sleeve and lightly pull.

“But we still have to watch that lame movie of yours!” she protests, outraged.

“Hey, I have already asked you to respect Balto” you jokingly reproach her “we’ll watch it next time, promise”

“Please, I want to watch it tonight! I won’t call it lame again!”

“Gabi, it’s really late—”

“Can I bribe you with hot cocoa?” Eren’s voice is softer than expected, which causes you to look at him, startled. Why isn’t he beaming at the idea of you finally leaving?

“With marshmallows” Gabi adds, tugging at your sleeve once again.

“Unless you’re so sick of my little sister you’re anxious to leave as soon as you can”

Low fucking blow.

“So long as I don’t miss the last bus home” you sigh, having barely the time to spare his smirk a glare before Gabi drags you all the way to the couch and promptly runs to the kitchen to get your backpack right after you fall on the soft fabric, waking the cat up. It’s not diffident as you might expect and after carefully sniffing the two fingers you politely offer as a personal introduction, it simply hops on your lap to curl up once again. A soft but demanding meow seems to ask for head scratches and, obviously, there’s nothing left to do but to comply.

“Are you plannin’ on winnin’ over every single Yeager family member?”

You don’t look at him, a weak attempt of playing your uneasiness off as indifference. But if there’s one thing you can’t guess about Eren Yeager, is that he’s in no rush, ever. Contrary to popular belief, he likes taking his time.

He’s not sure what it is about you, a stranger who’s barged in unannounced (well, to him, anyway) only to so effortlessly light up each room they’ve walked into. Someone capable of earning Gabi’s affection in such a short amount of time is bound to intrigue him at the very least, it’s normal, nothing unusual there. Right?

So what could be bothering him so much, he wonders while stirring cocoa powder, sugar, milk and salt in a saucepan. You haven’t been hostile, well, you’ve tried, but you were just unable to keep the facade up. You’ve laughed and smiled and joked and he feels this weird sting in the back of his throat just thinking about how nice of a person you must be on the daily, probably as good as the scent you carry around, and Eren has never wanted something as much as he now wants the book Christa is about to get as a christmas gift.

His hands are certainly big enough to comfortably balance tre mugs to bring to the couch with no risk of spilling but you’re so quick to turn around and reach over to get one, a soft I got it muttered with urgency as you pass the mug to Gabi and extend your hand to grab yours next. It’s probably for the best that his younger sister sits between the two of you and it makes him smile how invested she already is in a movie she didn’t even want to watch in the first place. The smile is still there when you both turn to look at him and laugh, Gabi pointing to his lips as he rolls his eyes and licks them clean of any whipped cream remains.

Gabi’s commentary slowly decreases in frequency and after ten minutes of silence, right as Balto and the sled team finally make it back to Nome, you feel a sudden, light weight on your shoulder. As you carefully take the empty mug out of her hands and place it on the coffee table, next to yours, you whisper an almost inaudible Eren.

“Should’ve guessed” the remark is gentle and there’s fondness in his gaze as he gets up to slowly pick his sister up, her arms finding their way around his neck as he balances her against his shoulder with a small hop.

“Be right back”  he whispers and you hum, briefly allowing your gaze to follow him as he exits the room, headed to the stairs. You get up as well, collect the emptied mugs and take them to the kitchen. Even if it’s late, so late you’ll probably have to find a cab and spend a fortune to reach your house, the least you can do is wash them and put them away. It’s been a long day but you’re not tired, quite the opposite actually. For whatever reason, you feel so on edge all you know is it’s time to leave that weird house, filled with a weird warmth that barely allows you to catch your breath, and get back to the comfort of your bed with its ice blue duvet and soft pillows.

“You’re missing the movie” the weird warmth carrier himself speaks, arms crossed, leaning into the door frame of the room as you dry your hands on your jeans.

“It’s for the best, I always cry at the end” you let out a faint chuckle and he mirrors it with a smile. He’s changed clothes and is now wearing a pair of washed out jeans and a v-neck shirt that has your gaze inevitably flicker to part of his inner forearm tattoo, one you can’t completely see because of how he’s standing. Does he also have one on his collarbone or are you seeing things?

“Before or after Rosy stops by the memorial in Central Park to thank Balto?”

“You’ve watched it! ” it’s hard to suppress the surprised smile immediately stretching your lips, the excitement in your voice. Damn it.

“And cried” he shrugs and you scoff as you walk past him to get your jacket from the coat rack by the front door.

“I’ll believe it when I see it” you put it on and pull the zipper, feeling some sort of discomfort on your back as you reach to grab your scarf too.

He’s in front of you in the blink of an eye, his hands casually slipping past and under the collar of your puffer jacket, fingers warm against your skin, nails only slightly grazing your neck as he fiddles around to pull out the hood of your sweatshirt. His fingers linger by your now feverish skin a few more seconds, definitely more than they should for someone who merely wanted to be of assistance.

Eren’s literally on the verge of asking you to stay. It doesn’t make sense, it’s ridiculous and lowkey pathetic, but he’s oh so bothered by the idea of losing whatever sudden, fragile wire you had managed to tie in the course of one afternoon. He wonders if you feel it, the way he’s so eerily drawn to you. And it’s not just because he hasn’t been laid in weeks (lost a bet to Connie and is now forced to keep it in his pants for a month), it’s not because he likes a challenge nor because he knows he’s been an asshole. You just feel so authentic. Unexpected.

As you let out a quivering breath, green eyes silently asking yours something you absolutely cannot pinpoint, the front door unlocks and your neck is left cold once again.

Eren’s parents come inside, his mom is a little taken aback at first but then puts the pieces together and begins to profusely apologize for both not having warned you that her son was back early and the fact that it’s so late you’ve probably already missed the last bus home.

“Please don’t worry about it, I had the best time with Gabi” you smile shyly, palms raised in an attempt to quell the string of embarrassed apologies threatening to submerge you. Carla looks at her son for some sort of reassurance, brows still distressingly furrowed.

Eren hums from behind you.

“Can’t remember the last time she had so much fun. She’s already asleep”

They both smile and Grisha gives you a soft nod while taking off his coat.

“Thank you. We know she’s not the easiest to deal with”

“Took her ten minutes to win her over” Eren speaks again, he feels closer this time but you don’t dare turn around. Carla puts both her hands on your shoulders and squeezes lightly.

“Please accept an extra for the trouble”

“There’s been no trouble Mrs. Yeager, I promise” you attempt a reassuring smile and she sighs, turning to look at her husband with a troubled look in her big eyes.

“Let us call you a cab at least” phone is already in his hand as he gently pushes back the thin framed glasses on his nose.

“No need dad, I’ll drop her off”

This time you do turn around, mouth open on the verge of objection, but he’s already put a jacket on and has your backpack in his hand.

“Good idea. Take my car” Grisha takes the keys out of the pocket of his now hung coat and casually throws them at his son.

“You really don’t need to” you do your best to sound polite but Eren can see the daggers you’re shooting him and simply smirks, eyes rolling by default.

“Always so polemic” he mutters under his breath as his dad opens the front door once again and there’s really nothing left to do but to sigh into your scarf, repeat ten more times or so that you had a wonderful time with Gabi and you’d be happy to be back whenever they’d need you to and awkwardly return the hug Carla decides to abruptly give you on your way out.

You climb onto the passenger seat of the black mercedes-benz waiting by the end of the driveway and you exhale with relief as your butt comes in contact with the heated leather of the seat.

“I meant it, y’know. I live half an hour away” you mutter while fiddling to fasten your seatbelt. Eren glances at the rear window as he skillfully turns the steering wheel, one hand closing on the gear knob to move the lever gently.

“D’you always protest against everything?” the question is friendly as he releases the clutch pedal and presses on the accelerator. The engine purrs pleasantly underneath you.

“If needed” you shrug, determined to focus on the houses and gardens you’re driving by at a sustained speed. It’s dark enough for you can spot glistening trees by windows and sparkly christmas decorations in yards. You briefly wonder if your dad’s feeling better, good enough to have had a few spoons of the soup you’ve left him.

“You forgot the movie at mine” Eren says, with studied casualness. It’s the perfect excuse to ask you to come over again, or to bring it back himself. Hell, he will hand it to you in the middle of any class if he has to.

“Let it be my christmas gift to Gabi. She never got to see how it ends”

His hand tightens around the steering wheel.

“How’re you so good with kids?”

Finally, you turn to peer at him, head pressed against the warm leather seat. It’s kinda annoying, how he’s wearing a jacket, because you still can’t find out what his tattoo looks like. However, you do take notice of how pretty his nose is, of the shape of his jawline and of how the intermittent, orangy light of street lamps shines on the darkness of his hair, eyebrows, eyelashes. And who even has cheekbones like that?

When his gaze flickers to you with a soft yet amused, questioning hum, you remember he’d asked you a question.

“I used to take care of my brother when dad was at work” you clear your throat, directing your attention to the road in front of you once again “and I like spending time with ‘em. It’s a nice break from adulthood”

He hums again but this time you don’t dare look at him.

“So you’re good with kids, school, great at drawing and cooking. Is there something you’re bad at?”

“So many things” you softly chuckle “besides, you’re good with kids and at drawing too”

“How d’you know? That I’m good with kids”

“Gabi told me you’re the best brother in the world. But you haven’t heard it from me”

“Not really a secret, I already knew that” he sounds cocky but you can guess from his tone that he's smiling. All day long he’s looked at his sister with a fondness impossible to conceal, the kind that stems from pure, raw affection. The kind that soothed you, because how to not be happy before the evidence of Gabi having an older brother that loves her so much? It reminded you of how you used to be with your brother, the way he’d scoff and tell your dad never to leave him with you all day again, only to slide onto the mattress beside you in the middle of the night.

“I wish I still had a little brother to take care of” you find yourself mumbling.

Eren glances at you, to his annoyance you’re still facing the other way.

“How old is he?”

“Old enough to smoke in his room but still dumb enough to think I can’t smell it” you snort and he laughs a genuine laugh. The car stops at a red light, even though the streets are empty. It’s good to know that he drives responsibly, or maybe it’s just because it’s his dad’s car, who knows.

“I’ll have to teach him my ways, he’ll never get caught again” he’s half joking but you pull a face, rolling your eyes.

“You would” it’s inevitable, turning your head to look at him again. It’s also a big ass mistake, because who in hell looks that attractive underneath a basic, red traffic light?

“What’s that supposed to mean?” his pitch is amused but the way he’s staring at you almost, almost makes you wince. Okay so, eyes? Dangerous. Note taken. You focus on the bridge of his nose instead.

“You seem like the type of person to do that. Get away with things”

Eren Yeager isn’t one to get insecure. In fact, he doesn’t even remember the last time he has felt uncertainty, or self-doubt. And now he ever so slightly shuffles in his seat, suddenly self-conscious and preoccupied with what you think of him. Not concerned with the superficial thoughts you might have about his cocky attitude or vanity, he’s worried about what you might think of him as a person. How bad does your opinion actually get?

“And you don’t like that” he states, with studied but careful measure. You frown.

“Well, duh. You just volunteered to cover for my brother”

He lets out a puff of air from his nose, both relieved and annoyed at your humor. Guess he’ll have to add deflecting to the list of things you’re good at.

“What did you get him for christmas?” he asks as his eyes are on the road again, the traffic light turning green. Safe from his piercing gaze, you don’t look away yet.

“The new pokemon legends game so he can say I’m the best sister in the world and forget about it ten minutes later” Eren’s smile mirrors yours by default as his grip on the steering wheel relaxes.

“What’s Gabi going to get?”

“A portable speaker, so she can blast Taylor Swift for the whole neighborhood to hear”

“Excellent music taste” you grin and he rolls his eyes with fake exhaustion.

The rest of the trip is comfortably quiet and so peaceful you struggle to keep your eyes open. When the car stops right before your house and you reach across the backseat to grab your backpack, there’s a weird gloom churning in the pit of your stomach. You clear your throat as you unlock the door, one leg already out of the vehicle.

“Thank you” your tone is soft as you glance at him one last time. Eren nods, hands now awkwardly resting on his knees.

You step out of the car and close the door as delicately as possible.

Things being back home for the holidays usually means:

a)indulging in your dad’s creamy homemade hot cocoa, b) having at least one christmas movie night with Historia, c) hugging your brother until he pinches your hip because he can’t breathe from how tight you're squeezing him, d) cooking and eating and napping on repeat

Things being back home for the holidays doesn’t usually mean:

a) forgetting your favorite sweater at your dorm like a dumbass, b) finding out your dad fell prey of food poisoning, c) acknowledging that your favorite blanket is nowhere to be found, d) having Eren Yeager call you by your name right after you step out of his car, only to peer at you with staggering eyes and ask

“What are you doing on new year’s eve?”

part 2

YOUR TEETH IN MY NECK | ARMIN ARLERT.

➳ synopsis. you’re new to the university and already struggling with classes. it’s a good thing your ‘friendly’ classmate, armin, offers to help. where would you be without him?

➳ contains. bimbo!reader, nerd!armin, college au, filthy praise/degradation, slight fear play, manipulation, condescension, voyeurism, sadism (if you squint), lying, library sex, slight dubcon, creampie, perverted behavior, unprotected sex, 18+ mdni.

➳ word count. 3,576

the vacant corridor felt like a slew of mazes as you tread along the unfamiliar path, keeping your eyes up above the many doors you passed in search for the name of your teacher that was brazenly written on your schedule. it was bad enough that it was your first day of school but to make matters worse, you also transferred in the middle of the semester.

when the recognizable name, paired with the room number came into your line of sight on the dark oak sign bolted into the wall, you slowly opened the door, certain that this was the class you were supposed to be in.

Keep reading

call it what you want

part 2 of dazzling haze, mysterious way

(eren x female reader) college au, enemies to lovers

wc: 8k+ lmao

warnings: cursing, alcohol, suggestive

Sure, you've babysitted his little sister for one afternoon, but Eren doesn't expect you to actually show up at the nye party he's impulsively invited you to. Not one thing about that night he was able to predict

“Didn’t you say this was going to be a low-profile thing?”

Connie snorts, taking a step back to admire the order of the bottles placed on the kitchen counter for a second, only to disrupt it and rearrange them completely.

“You always force me to lie” is his casual reply. Armin sighs, irritated.

“I just wanted to keep it chill for once. And, ideally, not wake up in a puddle of your vomit”

Jean chuckles at that and lands a not so gentle pat on his friend’s back.

“Cheer up, ‘Min. I’ll take care of that for once”

“And who’ll take care of you?”

“Our lover boy, of course” Jean sneaks behind one of his best friends, who’s sitting on the counter right next to the bottles, feet dangling nervously and phone in his hand.

“The fuck—” Eren gasps when two hands painfully squeeze his shoulders and not so gently shake him twice.

“Are you gonna tell us? ‘Cause if you keep staring at that screen, you’re gonna burn a hole in it”

“There’s nothing to tell, get off me” he slaps Jean’s hands away with a glare that only makes his friend laugh harder.

“Can’t remember the last time you had a crush” Connie grins, finally satisfied with the order of the bottles and ready to engage in the next activity that requires his undivided attention: annoying the shit outta Eren.

“I don’t have a crush”

“So you just wanna fuck her?”

“I’m sorry, when did I give you the impression that this was any of your business?”

Jean hums solemnly. “He’s getting defensive. Definitely a crush”

“Y’know, I heard Mikasa may come tonight” Armin casually takes another sip from the cup of tea he’s holding in his hands. Jean’s reaction is immediate, eyes like saucers as he runs to him and what, how do you know, where did you hear roll off his tongue in rapid succession. Eren shoots Armin a grateful look and seizes the opportunity to get off the counter and out of the kitchen. The guest bathroom is the only place where no one, not even Connie and his narrowed gaze will follow, and he needs a second to collect his thoughts.

He remembers the day Connie’s mom had ordered the pink microfiber toiled lid cover he now sits on, because he was there that afternoon and she had specifically asked for his opinion about it. As he unlocks his phone and taps on the cracked screen to open his instagram directs again, teeth mercilessly dig into his lower lip when he reads the same thing he’s been reading over and over again under the only message he has sent you.

Seen 18h ago.

To be absolutely fair, you never promised anything and he had barely mustered the courage to do something as trivial as following you on social media the day after christmas. It took you eight hours to follow him back but still, you did. He liked the story showcasing your brother unwrapping his gift but you didn’t like his story back, the one displaying Gabi carrying around her brand new speaker while blasting love story by Taylor Swift at full volume around the living room.

He shouldn’t expect a reply, after all. His message merely consists of Connie’s address followed by a just in case you change your mind. Still, as Eren leans back and rests his head against the cold, marble tiles, he can’t help but close his eyes and replay the stupid scene in his head once more. How your name had slipped past his lips for the second time that day, the casual question and the puzzled look on your face. Your I’ll stay home with my family, I don’t love parties. The pathetic disappointment crawling all the way up to his stomach as he mumbled a fair enough. Goodnight, then.

“This is fucking ridiculous” he mutters to himself, lightly bumping his head on the tiles behind him. So what if you don’t reply, if you don’t come? You don’t even like him, don’t even bother hiding the fact that you find him unpleasant to be around. He remembers how tense you were in his car, the way you could barely bring yourself to look at him, always facing the other way, a look so flat as you grumbled you seem like the type of person to do that, get away with things.

Eren conveniently erases everything else from his memory. Your smile, the jokes, an airy laugh, you’re good with kids and at drawing too, hardly held back giggles as he handed back his finished drawing, how your hands looked while slicing up ingredients and you seemed to belong in his kitchen, on his couch, at his table. The way he had shortly wondered how it would feel to lift you up on the same marble counter you were working on, jeans pulled all the way down to your ankles, legs looped over his shoulders as he crouched down, never breaking eye contact, fingers tangling in his hair tugging tugging tugging against the strands hard enough to make him groan-

“Okay, no” he grumbles, shutting his eyes again. The issue here is clearly coming from his groin, Connie and his bet be damned. It’s not that there’s anything special about you or wrong with him for caring so much about a stupid text, it’s just plain, ordinary sexual frustration. You’re a stuck-up tutor girl who accidentally happens to also be oddly attractive and nice to kids, s’all. It’s not like he doesn’t have any other options.

Eren unlocks his phone again, this time tapping on Wildcats, his basketball team group chat. A few seniors are part of the team as well, which always comes in handy when throwing parties.

(Eren, 3:56 pm) who’s coming tonight? Connie’s, 9pm

(Erwin, 3:57 pm) hard pass, I can only have him throw up on me so many times

(Niccolo, 3:58 pm) lmao

(Niccolo, 3:58 pm) I feel brave, I’ll come and bring food

(Bert, 3:58 pm) Reiner has to pick annie up so we might be late

(Eren, 3:59 pm) just be here before everyone’s too wasted to open the door

(Marco, 3:59 pm) @Eren can jean give me a ride?

(Eren, 4:01 pm) he will if you lie and tell him mikasa is coming with you

(Colt, 4:02 pm) holy shit, he’s still on that?

(Floch, 4:04 pm) sorry guys, already made plans

(Porco, 4:04 pm) I’ll be there just fucking stop spamming this chat

(Niccolo, 4:04 pm) @Floch you finally getting laid?

(Eren, 4:05 pm) be useful for once in your life and bring pieck @Porco

(Porco, 4:06 pm) eat shit yeager, stop sticking it in my sister

(Eren, 4:06 pm) she didn’t mind last time I checked

(Niccolo, 4:07 pm) king shit

(Porco, 4:07 pm) @Eren you’re repulsive

(Eren, 4:07 pm) don’t be late buddy

Eren smirks as he gets up and slips his phone, promptly put on silent, in the back pocket of his black jeans. He feels better, definitely closer to getting his shit together, your features slowly blurring out in the corners of his mind. As if.

“Are you taking a shit in there, man? I swear if you’re sending nudes from my goddamn bathroom—” Connie’s brutal knocks make him jump and he’s quick to open the door only to be met with a killer glare.

“Can’t even jerk off in peace” Eren mutters, theatrically wiping one of his hands on his jeans as he passes his horrified friend by.

As he gets back in the kitchen and hops on the counter, he’s finally more present and actually updates his friends on the new guests he had just invited, much to Armin’s annoyance. They’ll spend the afternoon playing call of duty, filling out bowls with snacks and then they’ll order enough pizza for an army as soon as the first guests start showing up.

Armin suspiciously eyes his best friend as he throws his head back in laughter at Connie’s expression when Jean voices his predictions on how many people will get drunk enough to jump naked in the jacuzzi sitting outside in the garden. Something has shifted and it’s too early for him to tell if it’s for better or for worse, still, he hopes it’s not one of those times when Eren screws everything up for himself without even realizing it.

Armin’s the only person who knows about you and the afternoon spent at his house, the fact that he had invited you to the party and has been nervously waiting for a response for an entire day. By now he’s known Eren for enough years to sense that nothing good would come from the sudden spike in energy he’s witnessing. Especially because all at once he seems too focused on Connie and Jean jokingly wrestling by the sink to notice how the screen of his phone, now sitting on the counter right next to his thigh, lights up.

You shuffle nervously in the backseat for the nth time and there’s no need to peer at the designated driver to guess that she’s rolling her eyes once more.

“You okay?” Christa turns to look at you from the passenger seat, worried frown barely twisting her delicate features.

“She’s fine” Ymir mutters under her breath, making your eyebrow twitch.

“I’ve been better” you grumble between gritted teeth and she huffs out a laugh.

“Better? As in wearing sweatpants and watching it’s a wonderful life with your dad while choking down jumbo blueberry pop tarts better?”

“Remind me why we’re even going to this stupid party?” you conveniently ignore the mean words directed your way and keep doing what you do best: pout and complain until Ymir is so exhausted she has to drop the mean act and actually feel bad for what she’s putting you through.

“Because we had no other plans, one of our new year’s resolutions was to try new things and you look hot in that dress”

You narrow your eyes as Mikasa, sitting next to you, chuckles.

“Do not lie to my face, you’re just happy you get to drink for free”

She shrugs and you groan.

“Maybe we’re gonna have fun” Mikasa timidly suggests and you direct a skeptical look her way.

“I’m just happy I get to spend the night with my best friends” she adds, gently nudging you with her shoulder.

“Oh don’t mind her, she’s just annoyed Eren Yeager turns her on” Ymir’s comment earns her the lightest slap on her leg from her girlfriend.

“I think I just barfed in my mouth a bit” your nose scrunches up in fake disgust.

Liar, Mikasa mouths and your knee bumps aganinst hers. Shut up, you mouth back.

When you had first told them the Eren Yeager had invited you to a party, their eyes had nearly popped out of their heads. You had to go through the entire day spent at his house, patiently explain that nothing had nor could’ve happened, carefully leave out any reference to the warmth of his chest pressing on your back whilst making dinner or the goosebumps you got from the feeling of his fingers under the collar of your jacket.

He’s hot and you’re a woman, no need to make a fuss about it. You’re allowed to admit how attractive he is, even if you can’t stand him. Even if you couldn’t believe he had actually followed you on instagram, the notification popping on your screen nearly giving you a heart attack. He has over 8k followers, barely any pictures (most recent one is from six months ago, depicts who you can only guess is one of his friends from behind, sitting on the hood of a car and wearing a black hoodie with a white writing that says get off my dick), but shares stories regularly and reposts stupid videos downloaded from tiktok.

Your friends had forced you to get out of your white sweatpants, wear the damn black sequin dress jacket and actually get out of your comfort zone for once. You’re not going for him, you’re going for yourself. You want to indulge in some fun, do something different, let go for once. It’s not going to be that bad, right? It doesn’t mean anything, that he’s invited you to the party. It doesn’t mean anything, that you’re going. Besides, Armin is probably going to be there, a prospect that soothes you.

As you get out of the car ever so carefully (it’s been a minute since you’ve last worn 6 inch heels), you watch as your friends to the same, Mikasa and Christa holding the paper bags with the wine bottles you have brought as a gift. Ymir pulls out her key fob from the pocket of her coat and the familiar chirp of her car’s locking mechanism echoes in a night that would be quiet if it weren’t for the loud, banging music coming from the villa at the end of the driveway.

Ymir casually throws an arm around your shoulders and lightly squeezes you against her for a second.

“If you feel uncomfortable at any moment tell me and I’ll kick ass” she whispers in your ear, managing to make you smile. They all look so nice. Mikasa with her black jumpsuit, Christa with her navy lace dress, Ymir absolutely rocking that burgundy flare pant suit.

It’s gonna be alright, you decide, as you all walk up to Connie’s front door and gingerly ring the doorbell. The door swings open in a second, making you slightly wince, and you recognize one of Eren’s friends right away.

“Hi, Jean” Mikasa smiles and the tips of his ears become pink.

Right, you remember, they know each other. They were assigned to the same group project last semester and they had hit it off, something you really don’t understand because every time you’ve seen Jean around campus he’s always been quite loud, obnoxiously jumping on Eren’s back or lying on the grass with one hand behind his head, eyes closed with Armin unsuccessfully trying to wake him up by slamming a notebook on his forehead. But when Mikasa is around he becomes quiet, almost shy, attentive with words and gestures. She finds it adorable and you do too: must be nice having someone who turns into the best version of themselves just for you.

“Mikasa! I’m so happy you made it! I mean— that you all made it” his gaze flickers to you for a second, then he steps aside, allowing you to get in.

Christa has to turn her head to hide her smile as he offers to take off Mikasa’s coat and is then forced to collect everyone else’s as well. Arms full, Jean leads the way to the living room, where everyone is, and indicates the kitchen with a struggled motion of a hand.

“Help yourselves to anything, I’ll be right back!” he smiles to Mikasa one last time before quickly leaving the room, headed upstairs.

You nervously look around, relieved as you take note that almost no one has noticed your arrival. However, Connie Springer, the host himself, comes out of the kitchen and instantly opens his arms in a welcoming gesture as he approaches your little group.

“Girls, hello! What can I get ya?” his smile is wide and genuine so you can’t help but mirror it.

“Thanks for inviting us. We brought these” Christa gently offers the paper bag in her hand and Mikasa does the same. Connie promptly accepts them with a small bow.

“Ah, you didn’t need to. I’m sure we’ve seen each other around campus but it’s nice to officially meet y’all, I’m Connie!” his grin is so infectious even Ymir cracks a small smile. As introductions are made, she asks if mixology is allowed and his eyes glow with genuine excitement as he asks her to follow him to the kitchen. She looks at Christa to silently ask if she’d be alright and she squeezes her hand twice with a smile and a small nod.

“Ohmygosh, hi!” you stumble as you suddenly find yourself wrapped in an tight embrace, with a high pitched voice ringing in your ears. You pull back just enough to be met with a pair of big, familiar and currently quite clouded eyes.

“Sasha!” you smile and hug her back, as an attempt to both reciprocate her affection and keep her steady on her feet.

“I didn’t know you knew these maniacs! M’so happy you’re here!” she kisses you on the cheeks and you giggle, catiously untangling yourself from her arms as Mikasa’s hands ghost over her shoulders, just in case.

“Girls, this is Sasha, we have the same major. Hey, are you okay? Do you need some wat—” Sasha literally throws herself over to your friends, hugging them both at the same time and chanting about how delighted she is to meet such beautiful women on such a fine night. You’re still laughing when your gaze casually meets a familiar one that has your insides twisting. There’s a girl sitting on the couch next to him, so close her thigh is basically flush against his, and some guy with blond hair is talking to him. But Eren Yeager is looking at you, eyes boring into yours as he slowly gets up and leaves the beer bottle he was holding on the coffee table. The dark haired girl looks displeased by her leg being left suddenly cold.

It’s embarrassing, really, how fast your heart is beating as he makes his way through his other friends to approach you, sage eyes never leaving yours, as if he can’t quite believe you’re actually standing there. You can’t quite believe it yourself, to be honest.

“You came” the blunt, almost breathed out observation serves as a greeting and you give him a coy smile, one that, paired with the outfit you’re wearing, is almost enough to shatter all the progress he feels like he’s made throughout the afternoon.

“My friends insisted and I thought it might be fun after all” your shoulders shrug out of a weird, awkward rigidity.

“So, polemic and skeptical” he can’t help but crack a smile.

It’s infuriating, really, how good he looks in just a pair of black jeans, a white shirt and some consumed dr martens. His hair is left down for a change and you feel the sudden urge to tuck the strands framing his face behind his ears.

“Can I get you anything?” Eren clears his throat and you blink as you realize you’ve been staring, letting the silence stretch way past a reasonable interval. Damn it.

“Uh, sure. Yeah. A beer?” he has to fight back another smile at your quizzical tone.

“You got it”

But the opportunity to get you a drink is taken from him as a heavy hand lands on his back, the blond guy with an undercut from before materializing next to him and offering you his hand.

“Hey, I don’t believe we met. I’m Porco” he smiles as his grey eyes light up. Uncertain, you smile back and introduce yourself, squeezing his hand. He turns to Eren, who is glaring at him in a way that makes you think he’s trying to burn a whole in his forehead.

“You can’t keep all the pretty ones to yourself, man. My sister’s waiting for you, remember?” Porco grins and squeezes his shoulder one last time before looking back at you. “We’re missing some players for beer pong. You girls wanna join in?”

“Yes!”, Sasha hollers and you turn around to find her squeezed between your friends, who are doing their best to keep her from collapsing on the floor.

“You’ve played enough, Sash” Christa chuckles at her pout. She offers to sit with her and cheer for your team in case you want to play and a newfound confidence warms your chest as you turn back to look at Porco. He’s good looking, seems nice and you’re there to have fun. To experiment. He doesn’t look like a bad place to start experimenting from and, most importantly, no one’s sister’s waiting for him.

“Me and Mikasa will play. Get yourself a good team” you smile and the pleased laugh he lets out heats up your cheeks. Eren, who hasn’t looked away from you once, wishes he still had that beer bottle tucked between his fingers to hold onto.

Letting go is fun, you decide.

You, Mikasa, Jean and Annie, some girl you had hit it off with right away, ended up winning against Porco’s beer pong team and they were all forced to pass around a cup filled with scotch whisky (singleton of dufftown, 54 year old, single malt) to honor the bet you had previously agreed to.

Throughout the entire night, both you and your friends have easily warmed up to the other guests. Ymir’s drinks became an instant success and she is happy to sit down and discuss different mixology methods with Annie, Connie and Jean, although you suspect the latter is just joining the conversation because he gets to sit next to Mikasa. Sasha’s had some water and a slice of pizza, so by now she’s feeling good enough to excitedly guide Christa and some guy named Niccolo through the best things she got to eat over the holidays and the topic she’s thinking of centering her senior thesis presentation around. You’ve been mostly standing in the kitchen, because it’s fairly quieter than the dining room, comfortably leaning against the wooden table to chat with Armin, Porco and some nice guy named Marco.

You’ve had two beers so far, not enough to get you drunk but a decent help nonetheless. You’re relaxed enough to have a friendly, far from awkward conversation with guys you have barely just met, laid back enough not to remove one of their arms from around your waist as you ask Armin about the new students he’s offered to tutor for the new semester, unbothered enough not to replay the scene of Eren Yeager sitting in a corner of the dining room lazily making out with couch girl in your head. It’s perfectly normal, it’s what he does. And it doesn’t faze you, the fact that he hasn’t talked to you all night. He’s invited you to a party only to ignore your very presence at said party. Normal. What he does. Again, not fazing you.

When Marco and Porco excuse themselves to take a short smoke break, the latter gently squeezing your hip before leaving the room, Armin clears his throat in a way he hopes sounds natural enough.

“So” he casually swings his cup filled with jungle juice, the orangy liquid dangerously swooshing around the red plastic “you babysit, huh?”

Oh no.

“Not often” is your cautious reply.

His blue eyes bore into yours. “I heard you’re great”

You hum, pensive, leaning against the table a little more. “I try. Most of the time s'just an excuse to watch disney movies”

He slightly pushes his lower lip forward, giving his cup another swing. “Heard you’re also good at cooking”

With a sigh, you surrender. “Armin, just get to the p—”

“I think he likes you”

Trying your best not to choke on your own spit, you blankly stare at him waiting for a hah, you totally fell for that. But it never comes. Armin just keeps staring back at you.

“You’re drunk” you state matter-of-factly, to which he finally cracks a smile.

“This is my first drink of the evening”

“I see. You’re just insane, then”

“Is it really so hard to believe?”

You frown. “What? That your friend, currently sitting in the other room with someone else’s tongue shoved down his throat, likes me? M'gonna have to say yes”

Armin scoffs. “You’re too smart to let his dumb act fool you”

Your ears start ringing as a result of your body heating up at an alarming speed, increased blood flow and everything. There’s really no point in arguing with him because you can feel your insides twisting once more. Desperate times call for desperate measures so you grab a clearly used cup from the table behind you and down its content, some amber-colored liquid that pleasantly burns your throat and explodes like fireworks in your chest. It’s Armin’s turn to frown at the fact that, clearly, you are letting Eren’s dumb act fool you. But if you are, it means there’s a chance you’re not as indifferent as you want him to believe. Which, finally, gives Armin something to work with.

“Listen…” he almost whispers, one hand gently grazing your arm, but Connie suddenly bursts into the kitchen, whining (more like slurring) about you missing all the fun as he grabs you both by the wrist and quite literally drags you out of the room. Armin decides to empty his cup in one go instead of risking to spill the drink on his light blue shirt and the way his nose wrinkles in distaste makes you giggle.

Someone has dimmed the lights to the point where you can barely see your feet as you stumble behind your abductor and now the beat blasting from the speakers connected to god knows whose laptop makes it impossible to hear anything else. All furniture has been pushed to the sides of the room, which now looks like a temporary but not least frenzied dancefloor.

“Connie, I don’t—” you attempt to free yourself but he only drags you more energetically towards the mass of bodies clashed together and yet still managing to take up the whole space in what's a definitely not narrow room. Your alarmed gaze meets Armin’s resigned one but you soon lose sight of him as someone else grabs you by the arm and pulls you right in so violently your bodies collide and you almost tumble on the floor.

“Sasha!” you groan in a faint attempt to escape her grabby hands, but she just shakes her head and yells an excited dance with me! right to your ear, making you wince.

Soon, however, your brain is saturated enough with the sweet liquor you’ve downed in the kitchen for your body to move on its own accord. Maybe tomorrow you’ll remember why you never mix when drinking, and possibly curse Ymir for sharing a video of you clumsily jumping around with Sasha and Connie on her instagram stories, but right now, this very moment, feels glorious.

You’re unaware of your surroundings and so deliciously ignited by a newfound boldness, there’s really no time to think or wonder or notice one of the very few people who aren’t dancing, leaning against the door frame and unable to cast his eyes away from your figure, discernible to him even amidst the throng of bodies taking up the makeshift dancefloor. It’s a fun sight, really, you arm in arm with two of his closest friends, Connie suddenly breaking free to gracelessly twirl both you and Sasha at the same time. She ends up colliding with Armin’s back and grabs him by the hand, yelling something right to his ear as she forces him to keep up with her moves, absolutely oblivious to the grumpiness sharpening Niccolo’s features. You’re having a good time, it seems, and it’s amusing how you jump around on those hellish heels when one of the most iconic (according to whoever lacks basic music taste, he believes) pop hits of the early 2000s comes up. The beat is so deafening Eren can’t hear himself think, which is a good thing, especially after the extra ten minutes he’s spent in the garden freezing his ass off following the annoying-to-a-whole-new-degree conversation he’s had with one of his teammates, who had casually offered him a cigarette after bumping into him on his way out with Marco.

So smart. Yeah.

She can keep up. He knows.

Holy shit. And she gets to be beautiful too. Accurate.

It’s fun, getting to look at you as you accidentally bump into Reiner and start apologizing at the top of your lungs, a loud, unbroken string of oh my god, I’m so sorry, are you okay, oh my god, I’m really sorry, that have him and Bert look at each other and erupt in laughter. It’s fun, until it’s not. Porco is laughing too as he gently grabs you by the waist to balance you on your feet and against his chest, a position you seem to appreciate as you welcome his touch and lean on him, your head lazily resting on his shoulder. You’re both out of step and he must point that out in your ear because you giggle and shrug, your hands covering his only to guide his arms further around you.

Eren isn’t really a drinker. He doesn’t like how alcohol tastes, never needs liquid courage, merely indulges in a beer or two at parties or celebrations. But holy fuck, if he isn’t on the verge of downing as many drinks as needed to get absolutely shit faced.

“You okay?” someone shouts so close to his ear he almost feels his brain rattle.

“What?” Eren shouts back, glad to have an excuse to finally look away from the dancefloor. Colt repeats the question with an even higher pitch.

“I’m great!”

His friend rolls his eyes and places a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Don’t take it personally!”

Eren frowns and follows his gaze, only just locating Pieck in the middle of the dancing crowd, smile fondly mirroring Marco’s. He almost throws his head back in laughter but is able to hold back, placing a hand on Colt’s shoulder in turn instead.

“All good!” and his friend smiles at that, giving him a thumbs up as he takes a sip from the cup he’s holding.

But, honestly, all is very fucking far from being good. Because Eren is left staring at you once again as the song changes and a lo-fi house mix starts blaring from Connie’s speakers which are, incomprehensibly, still not detonating. You’re nothing more than a silhouette in a light so dim he can’t quite discern your features anymore and still his jaw clenches as you turn around and wrap your arms around his friend’s neck. Eren exhales through his nose because how could this be happening? How is Porco the one getting to feel the back of your thighs, to take a handful of your ass in his hands? How are you pressing your body flush against him as he leans forward just enough not to leave any more distance between you two, the sight of your lips on his sufficient to make Eren's stomach churn?

“Be right back” he doesn’t even look at Colt to make sure he’s heard the deafening yell that bubbles from his throat as he turns his back to the mess he’s witnessing and makes his way upstairs, away from the pounding beat that’s making his head throb.

Two seconds after Colt is left alone by the door frame, you take a cautious step back, hands sliding down to Porco’s biceps to balance yourself.

“I need a second!”, you shout, to which he frowns, so you repeat yourself leaning a little more into his ear and there’s really no time to check if he’s heard you because two palms flatten against your back and lightly shove you out of the mob and towards the couch pushed to the side of the room. You clumsily land on it, heels be damned, and Mikasa almost trips on you in an attempt to sit down more gracefully. For what you’re able to see in the semi darkness, her cheeks are flushed and some strands of raven hair are sticking to her forehead.

“What’s wrong?” your first instict is to be alarmed as you grab her by the arm and offer your ear for her to shout into. Has Jean been grabby? Is she uncomfortable? Why are her brows so furrowed?

“What are you doing?” she asks, voice oozing disapproval as you blink in confusion.

“I was dancing?” you ask back, to which Mikasa rolls her eyes. The exasperated sigh she breathes out loud, clear, intimidating despite the banging music. She leans over to shout something back in your ear as a response but you only manage to catch a bunch of disconnected words instead of a rational sentence. Tongue, wrong, mouth.

“My tongue is wrong?” you cup her ear with your hand in an attempt to make sure she, as opposed to you, understands what you’re saying. Mikasa is annoyed but still, she indulges in a giggle.

“Your tongue was in the wrong mouth!”

“Why isn’t yours somewhere else right now?” you pull back slightly in hopes she can see your narrowed eyes. Mikasa lightly slaps your arm, a blush creeping up all the way up to her cheeks.

“Don’t deflect!”

Your throat is sore from screaming so you simply roll your eyes and pull out your phone, frantically typing in an empty text box and then proceeding to hold the screen in front of your friend’s face, the sudden light making her eyes squint.

He’s hot and he likes me, when will that ever happen again?

Mikasa snatches the phone from your hand and types back.

It’s already happened. Go find him.

Your gaze flickers from the screen to her, disbelief embedded in your features. Why is everyone convinced something as unthinkable as Eren Yeager being suddenly interested in you is real? Why are you getting shit for making out with a guy when he’s been making out with someone else all night?

You’re so fed up and tired of having to explain yourself and worn out from the tension clenching your limbs. As you take the phone from Mikasa’s hands one last time, you refuse to look at her.

I’m gonna go find a bathroom.

The room is slightly undulating as you get up and it takes a second to make sure you’re steady enough on your feet to walk away. Mikasa calls your name but you dismiss her concern by gesturing vaguely with one hand, not even bothering to turn around.

Throughout the years, movies and shows and books have taught you that bathrooms are upstairs at the end of the hallway, usually on the left, so that’s where you decide you’re headed to.

You stumble on the stairs, a hand is kept on the handrail for good measure as you grumble to yourself that maybe a pit stop in the kitchen to get some water would’ve been a smart move. Heels annoyingly click on the linoleum flooring as you arrive at your predefined destination. You abruptly let yourself in a random room by pushing a barely closed door open and squint your eyes for a second, not expecting the light to be on. Eren looks up from the bed covered with coats and jackets he’s sitting on. The beat of silence stretches for a moment too long: he doesn’t cast his eyes away and you awkwardly stand with one foot in the room, the other still by the door.

“Everything okay?” you hear yourself ask.

“You alright?” he inquires in synch.

He chuckles, you smile. Bathroom be damned: freshening up can wait a few minutes, you decide as you step in.

“No, don’t—” Eren suddenly raises his voice with an urgent pitch that makes you wince as you shut the door behind you, brows furrowed in confusion “close it” he sighs, hand coming in contact with his forehead with a loud smack.

Huh?

“D’you suffer from claustrophobia?” it’s incredible, really, that you’re able to spell out such a big word at the moment.

“Handle’s broken” he groans.

Oh.

You give it a hesitant try and sure enough it sinks easily under your grip, the door remaining locked. Great.

“Can you call someone?”

“Phone died. Can you?”

You promptly unlock your phone and select Mikasa’s name to tap on in your most recent calls list. Nothing. You try both Ymir and Christa next but who knows where they left their phones, it’s almost midnight and you doubt anyone’s stopped dancing to check their messages yet.

“Someone will come looking for us eventually” you shrug and walk over to what you can only guess is Connie’s bed, only to sit on the cream colored carpet on the ground, back pressed against the bed. Your shoulder is close enough to long legs wrapped in dark jeans and you have to resist the urge to lean into one of them as you stretch your own towards the wall, too tipsy too care about how exposed your legs actually are.

“What’re you doing here anyway? Everyone’s dancing” you hope you sound casual enough.

“I fled to avoid killing whoever is in charge of that playlist” his tone is playful, something that, for some reason, fills your chest with relief.

“So you’re a music snob” you glance up at him “who would’ve guessed”

“It’s called having taste”

Your snort comes out as a badly concealed laugh and he shortly turns his head to look at the wall on his right, to hide his own smile. He can tell it’s going to be a short-lived resistance but he isn’t willing to cave in to your warmth so easily. It’s immature, the annoyance churning in the pit of his stomach: he doesn’t own nor he has claimed you but he can’t bear the thought of Porco’s hands on you, the way you had melted into his touch, how your fingers must’ve tangled in his hair—

“Eren, d’you want to fuck me?”

He freezes, breath hitching in his throat. The first thing he registers, is how freakishly good you can make his name sound. The second, is the way your lips must’ve wrapped around the words fuck me. Certainly good enough to make his cock twitch in his briefs.

“What?” his voice comes out uncharacteristically choked and you look up at him through thick lashes, gaze so innocent he has to inhale deeply through his nose.

“S’that what you want? Why you’ve been so nice to me?”

It’s a pin-drop feeling the disappointment that suddenly washes over him like a tidal wave, sharp and powerful in its density. It’s like his stomach is crumpling up like a piece of paper, abdomen so squeezed he feels on the verge of throwing up right then and there.

“Can you elaborate?” he politely asks, as if one of his hands isn’t clenching the sleeve of a random leather jacket from the pile of outerwear scattered on the bed he’s sitting on. You shrug.

“Everyone’s been implying weird stuff ‘bout you liking me and I thought yeah, he’s been unusually nice but he probably just wants to fuck, s’all”

Is that what alcohol does? Turn you into this inhibited, brutally straightforward person?

Your words sting. Not because they’re true but because they could’ve so easily been true and Eren knows that all too well. He’d lie if he said he didn’t enjoy having a reputation, getting stopped by other students willing to compliment him on a particularly good game, having girls casually stop by his table at the campus cafeteria, receiving smiles and salacious proposals and having notes slipped underneath his door when they know he’d be in his dorm.

Eren dates but doesn’t actually do relationships. Being casual about flings means he gets to have more options and keeping things relaxed, temporary even, means he both doesn’t have to give in to actual intimacy and handle someone else’s depth. But that’s the thing: he doesn’t engage with any of that if he’s not absolutely certain the other person is willing to stay on the same, exact page. Not that he’s always been this considerate, by any means, but he’s learned his lesson and now strives not to be too bad of a person.

Has he fantasized about having his head buried between your thighs? Has he wondered how you’d look underneath him, if you’d ever want to be there in the first place? Yes. Does he like the idea of you thinking he’s spent an entire afternoon sketching candy cane forests and gingerbread houses, washing the dishes cause he could guess your tiredness, making hot cocoa to make you stay a little longer, inviting you to the stupid party, all just because he wanted to get in your pants?

No, he hates the idea. Fuck the idea, actually.

“If you believe I can only be nice to someone if I want to fuck ‘em, you’re not so different from what you think I am” he mutters bitterly, words cutting through the air like a knife slicing through softened butter.

Truth is, he’s being unfair and he knows it. Deep down he just didn’t believe you’d be the type of girl to be able to let go, enjoy a party, make out with some random guy and let him touch you in front of everyone. He didn’t think you’d be easy to charm but, hell, he at least hoped he’d be the only one attempting to.

“Well, you’ve only ever been an ass to me” your reply is just as bitter.

Has he? Well, it’s possible.

“You’re not a walk in the park yourself”

“Excuse me?”

He huffs.

“It’s practically impossible to approach you. And you’re judgmental, all the time”

You prop your elbow on the bed to gain some leverage as you turn your body towards him, mouth indignantly open to let out a string of protests.

“Don’t even get me started on the polemic tone” he rolls his eyes and you have to fight the urge to clench your fingers around the duvet.

“Okay, first of all, you just lack basic human courtesy” you intentionally ignore the being judgmental accusation because, much to your annoyance, it’s legit. Each time you’d get a glimpse of him or his friends around campus you’d only be able to think about how insufferable, obnoxious, annoying they were. A single night with them and you’ve already found out how sweet Jean can actually be, how friendly and genuine Connie is, how no one has made you feel uncomfortable or unwelcome even though you’re a stranger to all of them. Each of them went out of their way to make sure no one felt left out and that’s something you never would’ve guessed about some of the most popular people who usually roam around your school shouting loud, inappropriate jokes and randomly start piggyback ride challenges across campus.

“S'that all you got?” his chuckle is, for a change, infuriating. You want to slap his stupid knee. “You didn’t seem to mind my courtesy degree back at mine”

Yes, because you were actually surprisingly nice to be around.

Eren’s eyes are on you in a second while you struggle to come up with an effective comeback.

“Was I, now?” a smirk stretches his lips and you’re horrified to find out you’ve actually voiced your thoughts out loud.

“Let’s not talk” you cross your arms ovef your chest and lean with your back against the bed once more, face heating up so quickly you’re not sure hiding it it’s of any use.

“Or we could let this pointless hostility go”

“I’m not hostile, just reasonably annoyed”

“So we should just sit in silence?”

You’re certainly obstinate enough to let your non-reply speak volumes and it takes a whole lot of resistance not to snap at his chuckle.

And so minutes pass, the only sound punctuating the quiet being the muffled beat coming from downstairs, bass still managing to rattle your very bones. You could pull out your phone again, check social media to kill time, play a game of sudoku, but you don’t. Instead, you just keep staring at the wall, hyperaware of yet another not-entirely-unpleasant proximity.

It’s so fucking annoying, the effect he has on you. There’s something wicked about him, some sort of mysterious way that pulls you in, closer than what you’d like, words making blood rush to your head only to be turning you into a godforsaken, flustered mess the second after. You feel in this sort of haze whenever he’s with you, but it’s not a dark, smoky one: it’s ignited, blinding, dazzling. Like an obscuration of better judgment and rationality that feels just too threacherous to give in to and yet so appealing.

“I’m sorry” it’s soft, sudden and almost a whisper that causes you to glance up at him once more “I can be annoying but I’m not a bad guy, y’know”

You’re startled by his change of tone and feel the sudden, unwanted urge to get up and sit next to him. Threacherous indeed.

“It’s fine” and it really is, for fuck’s sake “I don’t think you’re a bad guy”

Your mind is slowly starting to gain back its clarity and you realize that you’ve actually, non ironically asked Eren Yeager if he’s only treating you like a human being because he’d like to have sex with you. Christ, someone can’t come open the door and let you out fast enough.

“Just an ass?” he asks and you’re relieved to recognize the playfulness embedded in his tone once again.

“Just an ass” you confirm, forcing yourself not to add a lenient sometimes at the end.

Eren sighs but you can tell you’re past the unsettling tension just experienced. As he slides down to sit on the carpet, awfully close to you once more, you’re left thinking about two distinct things: how freakishly long his legs are compared to yours and the fact that holy shit Eren Yeager has just actually apologized to you.

“Are you not enjoying the party?” the question comes out naturally as you carefully avoid his gaze, one ankle crossed over the other.

“What makes you think that?”

“You sitting in a room on your own right before midnight?”

With the corner of your eye you’re able to catch his shrug.

“As I said, bad playlist. Terrible headache”

“You left her alone”

“Who?”

“Your girlfriend”

A pause.

“Why’re you not looking at me?”

Reluctantly, you do. And there’s nearly not enough alcohol left buzzing through your veins to bear that gaze.

“She’s not my girlfriend” he spells out the words attentively, taking his time. Which makes the moment weird, uncomfortable, borderline intimate. God.

“Okay” you mutter back, uncertain. It’s pathetic, honestly, how thin your voice comes out.

He seems on the verge of saying something but that’s when you hear it: someone’s calling your name from the hallway. Is it Armin? No, his pitch is not that deep.

As he gets closer, you recognize him. It’s Porco. Of course he’s nice enough to come looking for you while your best friends are apparently too goddamn busy to give a shit.

Eren hasn’t cast his eyes away from your face, now so intently turned to anxiously look at the door handle being lowered multiple times to no avail. Porco is knocking, your name becoming a question as he waits for a reply that never comes. Why you keep sitting there in silence is something you can’t quite understand but it just happens. You don’t call back, you don’t frantically ask him to get Connie and the key to let you out. So, eventually, the handle stops moving and Porco’s voice fades once more. And Eren doesn’t ask why you haven’t moved, apparently more uncomfortable than relieved at the idea of the door being pushed open. He doesn’t, because he feels the same. And he’s done trying to give the feeling a name. Who cares?

“What if I do?” he mutters, certainly patient enough to wait for your gaze to meet his.

“What if you do what?” you dare look up from your lap at last, you dare let his challenging eyes bore right back into yours.

“Like you” the casualness with which he bares the very words that cut through the sudden, sweltering heat of the room, is jarring. Eren assesses the incredulous look taking over your features but doesn’t make fun of it. He wants you to take him seriously, just this once at least.

The music downstairs is suddenly turned down and you swear you can hear the echo of your pounding heartbeat, which is odd, because one would think the high-pitched buzzing in your ears would be enough to cover any other sound.

“You don’t know me” and he can’t fucking help it, the smile that rises to his lips. Because it’s not a protest, it’s not repulsion. It’s just doubt. And he can handle doubt.

“I’d like to start” you can barely register that his leg is flush against yours and so warm as he gets a little closer “if you’ll let me” and that right there is probably your favorite version of him: cautious, attentive, charming.

A deafening countdown begins a floor down as he waits, patient. You get closer, pulled in by the familiarity of his scent and sure enough you’re back in the blinding, gleaming haze he carries with him. Eren gets closer too, noses grazing and lips ghosting over each other as one of his warm, solid hands chastely closes around your knee, a gesture so simple and yet still capable of making you shiver. His breath is warm on your lips as he exhales gently, praying you can’t catch the desperation embedded in it.

Loud cheers erupt from a distance that seems infinite.

“Okay” you whisper.

Rush

Chapter 1: Reputation

Pairing: Eren Jaeger x f!reader

cw: explicit language, college au, fraternities and sororities, eventual smut, underage drinking

Summary: After an uneventful freshman year, sophomore Eren Jaeger joins Alpha Tau, the top fraternity at University of Paradis. In the aftermath of last semester’s scandal, the fraternity makes the decision to partner with the academically successful but socially unpopular sorority Sigma Nu Kappa in hopes of building back their reputation.

As a new member of Sigma Nu Kappa, you meet the mysterious Eren through your roommate and now sister, Mikasa Ackerman. His good looks and intensity pull you in at first. But like it is often portrayed in television and movies, finding love in a frat house is never that simple.

ao3 | Next Chapter

Rush Series Masterlist

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Alpha Tau fraternity. Arguably the hottest, most popular frat at University of Paradis. Ask any sorority girl who their favorite type of guy is. Nine times out of ten, their answer is “an Alpha Tau”. The same answer applies if you ask any goddamn independent who the worst type of guy is. Girls want to fuck them, guys want to be them, GDIs want to hate them. And that’s why they are the kings on campus. 

For the past ten years, Alpha Tau has always had the most numbers when it comes to recruitment, also known as “rush”. Every potential new member puts them at the top of their list. But that didn’t mean they had the most members.

The thing about Alpha Tau is that they pride themselves on being exclusive. As if a fucking frat wasn’t already “exclusive” enough. They are notoriously critical when it comes to accepting new members, often spending hours during rush week to decide who is worthy of being a brother. The basis of this is usually looks, athletic ability, legacy, and sometimes even academic prowess.

That’s how current sophomore Eren Jaeger and his best friend, Armin Arlert, managed to finesse their way into the elusive club. Eren’s older half-brother, Zeke, who graduated from Paradis a few years back, was a legend in Alpha Tau, known as “The Beast”. Zeke told him all kinds of wild stories about his college shenanigans, specifically about his time in the fraternity. Crazy parties, drunken adventures, all the hot chicks he hooked up with. It sounded like a dream come true to Eren after his horribly boring freshman year. That’s what inspired him to rush this year as a sophomore, dragging Armin along with him.

Once the frat found out Eren was a “legacy”, being related to “The Beast”, he was a shoo-in. He also persuaded them to give a bid to Armin, convincing them that he is the smartest and most strategic man they’ll ever meet, right next to Erwin Smith, the current president of the fraternity.

The others in his pledge class are Connie Springer, Jean Kirstein, and Marco Bott. Jean and Marco got in based on their athletic ability; they are members of the college soccer team. Connie was recruited purely for his funny personality and good nature. And maybe also the fact that he is a massive stoner, which they took a liking to.

Tonight is the first chapter meeting that the new pledge class is allowed to attend. After a few weeks of new member development, taught by the strait-laced and straight-edge senior Levi Ackerman, Eren and his class are officially Alpha Tau brothers. Now the fun begins.

As they fall in line outside the chapter room, Armin leans in close to Eren and whispers, “Some of the members got kicked out.”

He whips he head around and asks, “Huh? Are you serious?”

“Yeah. I heard that the last president, Nile Dok, messed up big time last semester. He was turning a blind eye to all the problematic members. They were caught cheating and trying to pay their way out of trouble. Obviously, they didn’t get away with it.”

As some of their other brothers start falling in line in front of them, Armin continues in a slightly hushed voice. “Also, they called themselves the Mega Pornstars, or the MPs for short. They had their own group chat, rating the girls they’ve hooked up with and ranking them. They had a whole list. Someone in that chat let it slip to Erwin, who immediately brought it up to Nile. And Nile knew about it all along. He was in the group chat himself, but never participated in it. But he knew about it. Saw what they were saying and didn’t do anything to stop it. So now, with Erwin being president, those members were immediately suspended during the summer. And the ones who graduated, he stripped them of any association with the fraternity.”

“How do you know about this? You seem to have all the details.”

Armin looks down to his side, and in an even quieter voice, replies, “Mikasa told me.”

Mikasa.

At the mention of her name, Eren instantly feels guilt. Ever since he decided to rush, he hasn’t had time to spend with his other best friend. Well, truth be told, he hasn’t made the effort to spend time with her. Armin, on the other hand, has. Making him feel even worse.

Realizing what Armin just said, he asks, “Wait. How does Mikasa know?”

Armin gives him a small smile and states, “Mikasa joined a sorority.”

~~~

Rushing a sorority was not something you thought you’d be doing the start of your sophomore year of college. But somehow, a few weeks later, you find yourself sitting beside your roommate and now pledge sister, Mikasa Ackerman, in your first chapter meeting as an official member.

The two of you have an interesting relationship. You were roommates in your freshman year, but it almost felt like you lived alone. She was always out with her friends and she only came back to the room to sleep and bathe. While she wasn’t necessarily your best friend, the few times you interacted were always cordial. Sure, she is a little intense, but she is never rude. Just absent.

It surprised you when you received a text from her over the summer asking to be roommates again. You thought she didn’t care enough to even consider you. Honestly, you felt a little honored. Despite her intensity, you always found Mikasa Ackerman to be cool. Aside from her dashing good looks, she had a confidence about her that just screamed badass. You lacked confidence yourself, finding your looks to be unassuming and plain. It didn’t help that your freshman year turned out to be as uneventful as you were hoping it wouldn’t be. How does one even find a party to go to? The few friends you made are just as home bodied as you, so spending time inside the dorm was the norm.

Sophomore year has proved to be much different than last. Mikasa, who used to be a ghost roommate, is now your friend. She spends most of her time with you now. Obviously, you don’t question it. Instead, you embrace it. You like Mikasa. It’s fun hanging out with her. It’s like you’re making up for lost time.

When she suggested rushing, you couldn’t help but think it was a joke. But no, she was dead serious. And as if Mikasa wasn’t already convincing enough, she asked you, “Don’t you want to be more social this year? Go to college parties? Meet boys? Have fun?”

And that’s how you end up as an official sister of Sigma Nu Kappa.

The thing about Signa Nu Kappa, or SNK for short, is that they aren’t the most popular sorority on campus. Notoriously, women rank it last on their interest list during rush week. On paper, it’s an organization that has great academic reputation, making it well liked among the professors and staff. They are the ideal representation of what the Student Affairs Committee want a sorority to look like. However, to the fellow students, they are boring. They don’t party. Their social reputation amongst the other organizations in Greek Life is essentially nonexistent. It’s also seen as the place where all the women who couldn’t get into their first pick, maybe even their second or third, end up joining. The rejects.

Is it true? Maybe for some women. But after getting to know the sororities during the first week of recruitment, both you and Mikasa end up ranking SNK first. You feel comfortable with the women there. While the other sororities are nice, it’s Signa Nu Kappa that feels like home, as cheesy as that sounds.

Now, after a few weeks of getting familiar with the sorority and Greek Life in general, you and Mikasa sit beside each other, attending your very first chapter meeting as Sigma Nu Kappa sisters. Current president, Hange Zoë, stands at the podium, reading announcements off a piece of paper.

“Welcome new babies to your first official Sigma Nu Kappa chapter meeting! Woohoo!”

The other sisters clap, beaming at you and the rest of your class. You give Mikasa a knowing smile, which she returns. Hange reads off a list of housekeeping items, none of which apply to you considering you don’t live in the house yet.

“Okay! The boring stuff is out of the way. I’ll let our Social Chair take the stand now!”

Petra Ral, another senior, take’s Hange’s place at the podium. “Hi sisters! I have a very exciting announcement to make. This semester, we are being paired up with a fraternity in the effort to build stronger relations with the others in Greek Life.”

This news creates a buzz around the room. You hear one of your pledge sisters, Sasha Braus, squeal two seats down, “Ooohhh boys?!”

Petra continues. “Now I know we don’t have the best reputation for being the most social sorority, and this partnership might be a little bit out of the comfort zone for some of you. But we strongly believe this is a great way to improve the status of our organization. We don’t want to be seen as a sorority that only performs well academically. If we want more women to join us, we need to be seen as fun! Which we are! They just don’t know it yet!”

Hange exclaims, “Well said, Petra! There’s no doubt that we are a fun group of women. People don’t know it yet. But they will soon enough!”

“So which frat are we pairing up with?” Nanabe, another senior, asks.

With a bright smile on her face, Petra announces, “Alpha Tau!” The buzz in the room is even louder now.

Suddenly, you feel Mikasa stiffen beside you. You turn to her and whisper, “Are you okay?” There’s a worried look on her face, but she doesn’t say anything.

Three seats down, next to Sasha, you hear a sarcastic snort from Annie Leonhart. “Great. We’re getting paired with a bunch of disgusting pigs.”

Christa Lenz, who sits to your other side, leans forward to ask innocently, “Annie, what do you mean?”

Ymir puts her arm around Christa’s chair and answers, “She means exactly what she said, sweetheart. Alpha Tau is a frat of disgusting pigs.”

Mikasa snaps her head towards Ymir and yells, “They’re not!”

You and the rest of your pledge class are taken aback by her outburst. Annie leans forward to face Mikasa with a smirk. “Don’t worry, Mikasa. I don’t include Armin when I say that. But everyone else in there can choke and die for all I care.”

Mikasa glares at her, fury in her eyes, looking like she’s ready to attack. Before anything escalates, Hange joins Petra at the front. “Okay, listen everyone. I know this is a very…controversial decision. Now, let me reiterate that what is said in this chapter room, stays in the chapter room. Got it?” She eyes you and your pledge class before proceeding.

“Alpha Tau is very close to being on probation by the Student Affairs Committee. Some of you may already be aware of this, but a small group of their members participated in some very inappropriate conduct. Since Erwin has been president, those members have been kicked out and properly dealt with. Erwin has made sure that they no longer represent Alpha Tau in any way whatsoever. Both Erwin and Levi Ackerman, their vice president, came to me and Petra wanting to form a partnership this semester in an attempt to improve their besmirched reputation. By pairing with us for a semester, they hope to prove to the committee that they can be a respectable fraternity, both with academics and towards women.”

Nanabe questions, “Why us? The other sororities perform fine academically too. Seems so out of the blue they want to partner with us.”

“Well, based on numbers, we have the highest average GPA. Also, truthfully, none of the other sororities were willing to partner up with them. Considering the circumstances.”

“What circumstances?”

Hange pauses, unsure whether to continue or not. “Okay. Let me say this again. What is said in this room stays in this room. The now banned brothers from Alpha Tau made a list ranking the women they had sex with.” There are a few gasps and shocked reactions at this news. It makes you sick hearing it. “This includes many women from the other sororities. So, naturally, the presidents of each of those sororities are choosing to distance themselves from Alpha Tau, at least for this semester, once all the smoke clears. Until then, we are the only sorority who has a clean slate with Alpha Tau.”

Petra adds, “Also, both me and Hange are close to Levi and Erwin, respectively, and they’ve been wanting to pair with us for quite some time. Now that they are prez and vice prez, they have more say in those matters and are finally making it happen.”

“So, we’re just supposed to be okay with pairing with a fraternity that ranks women based on their skills in bed? How is this okay?” Annie argues.

“They kicked out those members! The current brothers had nothing to do with it!” Petra cries out.

Ymir chimes in with a smug expression. “Wasn’t their last president in on it too? That Nile guy? And is it true they called themselves the Mega Pornstars?”

Hange answers with a frenzied look, “Nile didn’t participate in it! And he’s already graduated, so it doesn’t matter anymore! But yes, unfortunately the Mega Pornstars thing is true.”

More groaning surrounds the room. You look over at Annie, who crosses her arms with a furrowed brow, silently sulking. Turning your head the opposite way, you see Ymir whispering to Christa, who eyes are wide with shock, the poor thing. Suddenly, Mikasa stands up straight, the unexpected movement making you flinch.

“My vote is yes for this, President Hange! We have to help them get their reputation back. For Armin…and…and for Eren…” She stops talking, looking deep in thought at that last part.

Eren? He must be the other friend. The one she no longer hangs out with.

Hange looks over at her, confused. “Uhh, we don’t technically need to vote on this, but thank you for the vocal support, Mikasa. Look everyone, I know this is unprecedented, but I can assure you: This is going to be beneficial for both parties. They need our help to build back a good reputation; we need their help to further improve ours. It’s a win-win.”

“We’re going to be collaborating with them mostly for charity events. But we were thinking we can also have a couple of exchanges, for fun. Oh, by the way, for our new members, exchanges are social events between a sorority and fraternity. We haven’t gotten down to the nitty gritty details, but I will update you soon on a schedule of events!” Petra explains.

The president takes over again and ends the chapter meeting, thus ending the conversation on Alpha Tau all together. You and Mikasa gather with the rest of your pledge class to walk back to your dorms. Sasha is the first to bring it up once you’re well away from the house. “So, what do you ladies think? About the whole Alpha Tau thing?”

Ymir scoffs, “Well, you all certainly know how Annie and I feel. I’m trying to convince little Christa here to feel the same, but she’s not having it.”

“I just think we should give them a chance. Just like they’re giving us a chance, right?” Christa says, as sweet as ever.

After having a few minutes to digest the information, you say, “I agree with Christa. I think we should go in with an open mind. I trust Hange and Petra’s judgement. I don’t think they’d put us in a situation that would harm us. This Erwin Smith guy seems nice enough.”

“It’s not Erwin Smith I’m worried about,” Annie says.

“Annie, stop being so cryptic and just tell us what you know!” Sasha exclaims, biting into a piece of bread that she somehow conjured from her pockets.

“There are these two guys I know in there. One of them isn’t so bad. Bertolt. He’s actually okay. The other, well. He’s just a straight up dick. Reiner. Reiner Braun. Straight up asshole.”

“What makes him such an asshole?”

“He’s just a typical frat boy. Obnoxious, cocky, a player. The three of us went to the same high school. They’re a year older than me.”

“Just because he’s a fuck boy doesn’t mean they all are! Armin’s in there, and he’s a total sweetheart! Right Mikasa?” Sasha turns to Mikasa, begging for a comment.

Mikasa stares at the ground with her hands in her pocket. Quietly, she replies, “Yes. Armin is a sweetheart.”

“Isn’t your other friend in there too? Eren? What’s he like?”

You try not to let your curiosity show, but you can’t help but perk your ears up to Sasha’s question.

Mikasa stays quiet for a few seconds, before saying, “He’s nice too.” No more elaboration.

“See, Annie? All we have to do is avoid this Reiner guy and it should be fine! Don’t let one rotten potato spoil the whole bag!”

“Why does it always seem like you’re talking about potatoes, you doofus?” Annie snaps.

You all veer off into different directions, saying goodbye for the night. As you and Mikasa walk towards your dorm, you let a comfortable silence fall between you, not wanting to cross any lines with your roommate. At the door, Mikasa mutters, “Wait.” You turn to face her, listening.

“I’d like to get some things off my chest.” You mentally brace yourself for what she’s about to reveal to you.

“I know that you’re probably wondering who Eren is. He’s my best friend. Him, me, and Armin. We all grew up together, but Eren is practically a brother to me. And I know you must have been curious why all of a sudden, I’m hanging out with you more than them.” She swallows before she continues. “The truth is, ever since he rushed Alpha Tau, he’s been too busy to hang out with me. Sometimes I think he’s forgotten about me completely. Armin still makes time to see me, but even he’s too busy nowadays. So, I joined a sorority to make more friends and be more social, instead of sulking in my own loneliness. And I don’t harbor ill feelings towards Eren. Maybe I did at the start, but not anymore. I just…I just want to make sure he doesn’t forget about me.”

She stares at the ground the entire time, arms crossed over her chest. “I guess what I’m trying to say is thank you. For being my friend. And going through this with me. And since we’re going to be seeing a lot of Alpha Tau now, you should know about Eren, since you’ll probably be seeing him too.”

This is the most you’ve heard her speak. It stuns you for a few seconds. You let a moment of silence pass before you walk towards her and put an arm around her shoulder. “Mikasa. Thank you for telling me. I know it’s not easy opening up.”

She looks at you, expression still serious. “It’s not, but I feel like you should know.”

“I appreciate it. Hey, I know it feels like you may have lost a brother, but at least you gained a sister, right?”

Finally, a small smile forms on her lips. “Yeah, I guess that’s one way to look at it.”

“You should just try talking to him, tell him how you feel,” you suggest as you swipe your ID to open the door to your dorm.

“I’ve tried to text him, but he never responds. I can’t ever get a hold of him.”

“Well, maybe this collab with Alpha Tau is exactly what you need to reconcile with him.”

“I guess.”

Back in the room, the two of you change into pajamas and start getting ready for bed as you continue to chat about other topics besides Eren. Once in bed, you turn to your side and contemplate the night’s events.

There’s no denying that this partnership with the most popular fraternity on campus excites you. Disregarding the giant shit stain from the bad apples, everyone knows that Alpha Tau are the “cool” guys on campus, whatever that means. Maybe this is exactly what you need to work on your confidence. It’s a good opportunity to meet new people, maybe practice a little bit of flirting. Maybe even make some new friends.

One thing is for sure: You are determined to make this year more exciting than last.

~~~

Erwin Smith, Alpha Tau’s chapter president, stands up straight in the front of the chapter room. His first announcement of the night is regarding “big brother” assignments.

“New pledge Armin Arlert. Your big brother is Bertolt Hoover.”

Bertolt, who sits in front of them, turns around to give Armin a kind smile, which is returned.

“New pledge Eren Jaeger. Your big brother is Reiner Braun.”

Right next to Bertolt is blond-haired junior Reiner Braun, who turns to give Eren a cocky smirk before saying, “Hope you’re ready to fucking party, man.”

Eren smirks back. “Hell yeah. You gonna show me the ropes?”

The blonde only scoffs as he turns back around to face the front.

Eren nudges Armin before paying his attention back to the president. After he reads off the other big brother assignments, he says, “I’d like to give the floor to our vice president, Levi Ackerman.”

“Good evening, everyone. Welcome new members to your first chapter meeting. On a serious note, I have some news that I know most of you are aware of already.” He explains the situation about Nile Dok and the “MPs”, more or less of what Armin told Eren just a few minutes earlier. “I know it’s a bit of a hit to our numbers, but those members did not exemplify the values of Alpha Tau. President Erwin did what needed to be done.”

“Hear hear!” one of the seniors yell, followed by some cheers from the others.

Another senior that Eren met a few days ago, Mike Zacharias, says, “Fuck the MPs. And fuck Nile Dok.”

“Mike,” Erwin warns from the side. Nile was Erwin’s big brother, unfortunately.

Levi continues. “Honestly, we should be ashamed we let those fucking pricks into our organization in the first place. But what’s done is done. Now onto my other big announcement. To atone for what those fucking shit stains did, Erwin and I have decided the best way to move forward is to pair up with one of the sororities on campus.”

This news results in an overwhelming round of cheers and hollering from the brothers, to which Eren can’t help but join in on. He nudges Armin again, who smiles.  Jean, who’s seated on Armin’s other side, leans in close to whisper, “Who do you think it’s gonna be? I hope it’s the Delta Mu’s, they’ve got the hottest chicks.”

Connie chimes in, “Eta Iota girls are hot too. Walked by them while they were doing their porch yells last week.” He lets out a low whistle.

“Oh yeah! All the sororities had their first chapter last Sunday,” Armin notes.

Levi raises his voice over the commotion. “Alright brothers, settle down, settle down. After a lot of discussion, we’ve decided that the sorority we’re pairing with is Sigma Nu Kappa.”

A different outburst fills the room now. There are a few cheers, mostly from the seniors, but there is an overwhelming sound of disappointed groans.

“Sigma Nu Kappa? Are you fucking serious?” Reiner grumbles to Bertolt, who just nods with a neutral expression on his face.

Armin, on the other hand, can’t help but grin and exclaim, “Yes!”

“You know about them?” Eren asks.

“That’s Mikasa’s sorority!” he answers, excited.

Eren still can’t get over the shock that Mikasa Ackerman, the girl he grew up with over the last ten years, the woman who looks like she couldn’t hurt a fly but can actually kick your ass, is now in a sorority. It’s something he has to see to believe. And given this announcement, he’s going to see it sooner than he expects.

“Now, I know a lot of our brothers aren’t familiar with the sisters of Sigma Nu Kappa. This is a great opportunity to get to know them. Most of us seniors are familiar with the other seniors in Sigma Nu Kappa and I can say with full confidence that they are a group of fine, albeit unique, women,” Levi tells them.

Erwin stands up and walks beside Levi, adding, “Yes. It’s in all of our best interests to be respectful and welcoming to the sisters of SNK. As Alpha Tau men should be to all women. I will not tolerate disrespect or harassment of any kind. I am quite close to President Hange Zoë, so be warned. Any hint of misconduct, you are out.”

“Petra, who is their social chair, and I are working on a schedule of events. We plan to have our first exchange in two weeks, followed by a volunteer event a week after that. I’ll send an email reminder later, along with role assignments for the exchange. Any questions, you can come directly to me. My room is on the second floor.” With that, Levi adjourns the meeting. Before they file out, Levi yells, “Pledges. Meet in the kitchen in five minutes. I’d like to have a word before you leave tonight.”

Armin and Eren tail the rest of their pledge class as they make their way downstairs towards the kitchen.

“This is exciting! I’ve been curious about this sorority ever since Mikasa told me she was rushing. She said this was her top choice.”

“Why didn’t she say anything to me?”

“I’m sure she tried to, Eren. You don’t ever respond to her texts.”

“Well, how am I supposed to respond to a text that just says ‘Eren’? If she has something to say, she should just say it.”

“Oh, Eren,” Armin responds, shaking his head in disappointment.

They gather in the kitchen, waiting for Levi to meet them. He comes down two minutes later, a stern look on his face, as usual.

“Pledges. Just wanted to clarify some things. An exchange is a gathering between a sorority and fraternity. I know I said I have some role assignments, but I can assure you, you will not have any assignments during our first exchange with Sigma Nu Kappa. We want you to enjoy your first party as official Alpha Tau brothers.”

Jean responds, “Hell yeah. Good shit, Levi!” Marco follows with a cheerful, “Yay!”

When the vice president dismisses them, Armin and Eren make their way towards the front door to start walking to their dorm. Before they reach the handle, Reiner’s voice booms from the top of the stairs.

“Eren! Armin! Bertolt and I are getting McDonald's. Want to come?” 

The best friends look at each other for a second before agreeing with a resounding, “Yes!”

A few minutes later, Eren and Armin ride in the back of Bertolt’s Honda Civic while Reiner occupies the passenger seat. Classic 80s rock blasts through the car’s speakers as they ride off campus with the windows rolled down.

Reiner turns the volume lower on the car to speak. “So, what did you guys think of your first Alpha Tau chapter meeting?”

Armin replies, “It was cool! I’m excited to be paired up with Sigma Nu Kappa.”

Reiner scoffs, similar to what Eren heard earlier in the chapter room. “I don’t know about these Sigma Nu Kappas. I heard they’re pretty lame.”

“My best friend is in SNK, she’s in the new pledge class,” Armin says, a bit defensively.

“Annie’s in there too,” Bertolt adds.

Another scoff from the blond. “Annie? Now I know for a fact they’re lame if they gave her a bid.”

Eren notices Bertolt’s grip on the steering wheel tighten but doesn’t say anything in response.

“Hey, Eren. Did Zeke ever tell you how he was my big bro when I first joined? He was a senior when I was a freshman, and he already had two other littles from the previous pledge classes. But he still picked me up. Dude was a legend,” Reiner says.

“I didn’t know that. I guess it’s fate that brought us together,” Eren responds, with a deadpan expression.

Reiner laughs. “You’re a little crazy, you know that? You say some weird shit, but I like you. This is going to be fun.” He turns towards the front and blasts the music on high again, drowning out any potential for further conversation.

Eren nods his head along to the music, leaning his face towards the open window to feel the coolness of the night air against his skin. The breeze blows through his long hair as he repeats the sentiment from Reiner in his head.

This is going to be fun.

𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐄𝐆𝐎

↳ a foul-mouthed, aggressive, pro-soccer player on the verge of being disqualified from the biggest game of his life, is tossed into a fake relationship with a spoiled heiress to salvage their bad public reputation. what exactly could go wrong?

𖨆♡𖨆 itoshi rin x fem!reader

cw. mentions of alcohol, mentions of food, sexual tension, mean!rin, fake dating, language, suggestive content, reader wears makeup & does skincare, one slap, slow burn

masterlist | playlist

#2: LOVE ABUSER

That morning, you woke up on the soft bed, unsure how you had found yourself here. 

The last thing you remembered was Rin’s cruel words, and then you had sat on the sofa in a huff, fatigue overtaking you; where you fell into a quick slumber with your arms crossed tightly around your frame, and a frown etched on your face.

While you were still in your dress from the night before, your limbs and neck did not hurt, evident from the good sleep you had managed to get. Your phone on the nightstand chirped, and a notification popped up.

The production team is about half an hour away from your penthouse.

Your brows furrowed at Anri’s message, your foggy mind sifting through your commitments for today. 

It hit you the same moment Rin’s loud swearing reached your ears. 

“—the production team is coming today!” 

“—fuck, they’re on the way.” 

You both blinked at each other. Rin’s hand on the doorframe was curled into a fist, frustration on his pretty, sleep-warm face. He had barged into the bedroom at the right time, still in his dress shirt from yesterday, and looked a little worse for wear after his night on the unforgiving couch. Between your smudged makeup, his rumpled clothes and the animosity which existed between you two, there was a lot of work to do before the studio team arrived.

They were a production house hired by Ego to film you and Rin for a segment called Living With You—a popular reality show where the everyday lives of famous couples would be streamed for the world to see. Frankly, the thought of such invasive media made you uncomfortable, but it was the price to pay for being in a relationship with Itoshi Rin—albeit a fake one, of course.

You shared a look with him, one that said we’re fucked. Rin didn’t spare any time to think. 

“Get dressed. We have to clean the house before they arrive.”

It was the fastest shower you had taken in your life. Rin threw open the balcony doors and windows to let in fresh air, and sprayed a ton of Febreeze on the couch; conscious to pick up any evidence that he was spending nights separately from you. He kicked his blanket and pillows into the spare room, and once you were out of the shower, he brushed past you to clean himself up. 

It was your turn to wipe down the counters and sanitise the kitchen. Running a quick mop on the floors was a feat considering you were suffering from a hangover. 

The throbbing in your temples were aggravated by the sight of your shirtless “boyfriend” exiting the bathroom, water sticking to his abs and the ends of his dark hair damp. You tried hard not to stare at him, averting your gaze to the task at hand. Rin brushed past you, helping you clean up the dishes and storing them overhead, oblivious to you growing flustered from his close proximity and blatant half-nudity.

Stop staring at him! You bit your lip, focusing hard on removing a stubborn stain on the otherwise pristine marble. 

“Did you put on some makeup?” Rin demanded. Though the professional team would handle your appearance, you had to withhold a semblance of self-possession; judging from your disorderly countenance, they could tell you weren’t in the right train of mind. Your hair was sticking up in odd ends, and your face was too plain.

Shooting him a glare, you tossed the soiled cloth at his broad chest with a huff. “Fine. Make sure that spot is gone when I come back.”

You didn’t stop to assess his reaction, thundering towards the bedroom to make up your face and try to arrange the bed. Once your cheeks and lips were shining with health and you looked somewhat invigorated, unlike a corpse suffering from a hangover, you laid the duvet flat, fluffed up the pillows and yelled for Rin to put his shirt on.

His gruff protest reached you, and you rolled your eyes. Stupid, over-sized man child.

A knock on the door halted your frantic movements, and you sensed Rin freezing, too. The both of you were thrown into such an unprecedented scenario that neither of you knew what to do next. Another knock persisted.

Finally, it was you who unglued your limbs and rushed to the door, plastering on a smile. “Coming!”

The production crew were younger than you expected, and returned your tight smile with bows and quick introductions. They set up their equipment on the sidelines, while you were prepped by the makeup team. In keeping up with the homey-theme, you could not appear too glam and they chose a more natural finish for your skin which complemented Rin’s healthy glow. 

He was sullen when the stylists brushed his hair and primed his skin with a light layer of foundation, reminding you of a puppy that was forced to be sent to a pet groomer. 

The director arrived an hour later, holding a cup of coffee and an apology for his tardiness. 

He shook hands with Rin and gave you a low bow. Ego had sent a Blue Lock representative, the PR manager whose name you still did not know, and Anri herself. On your side, your father sent his assistant to make sure you were on your best behaviour.

The time to shoot was almost on you both, and before the cameras could roll, you were surprised when Rin pulled you into a corner. His sudden close proximity after last night’s tension laden confrontation made your stomach turn funny, and you tried to mimic his deadpan expression, a similar scowl on your face.

“What, Itoshi?” 

“I know you’re pissed off at me, but our reputations are hanging by a thread here.” He spoke in a low, deep whisper. You hated how it sent shocks of electricity up your spine, your skin prickling from every warm exhale caressing the nape of your neck; goosebumps rising from the closeness this sudden proximity forced you in less anyone else accidentally overheard the both of you plotting. “I need your help to cooperate, okay? I really want to go to the World Cup and Coach Ego will ban me if I get more bad press.”

The power you held to have the Itoshi Rin begging for you to work together with him. You bristled and frowned. Wasn’t it the exact same thing you had told him yesterday? His switch-ups were making you dizzy with whiplash. 

“Whatever.” 

Your callous response must’ve shocked him because a furrow appeared in between his brows. Hammering in your insolence, you pressed your palm flat on his chest and pushed him aside with a scoff.

“Wait—” Rin reached for your wrist and tugged you back into the alcove, his body pressed tightly to yours. You tried not to warm at how you were close enough for your chest to brush his defined one, those teal eyes boring down into your face with a glare of desperation. “You were… you were right.”

You could tell it took a lot from Itoshi Rin to admit his mistake judging from his gritted teeth and clenched jaw. “We have to be teammates. I… fuck. Help me and I’ll… help you.”

Rin trailed off, unsure if he was saying the right things.

He was such a ball of constipated emotions, you could not tell where his consternation started and his desperation ended. 

Deciding that it would be easier for you to accept his truce than to drag it on for the sake of today’s shoot, you reluctantly nodded.

“Fine.” Your voice was cold, remotely absent of the fondness you would hold for everyone around you, even for your distant and indifferent “boyfriend”. Rin’s furrowed brow deepened, and he was about to ask you if you were kidding when you squeezed past his tight grip and back into the living room.

Your expression did a complete change, and you grinned at Anri. “Is it time to shoot?” 

She glanced at the camera setup and nodded, a quick, eager bob of her head. “Almost. Are you and Itoshi-kun ready?”

Speak of the devil and he shall appear. You felt his arm wrap lightly around your waist and stiffened slightly. But, if Rin felt your sudden clamminess, he didn't comment on it, fixing Anri with a reserved stare. “We’re ready.”

The Blue Lock co-founder smiled fondly. “Remember to show some emotion, Itoshi-kun. It would be good for your ranking.”

Someone yelled action!, and the silent cameras started to roll.

The crux of Living With You was a show where couples would go about their daily lives and the cameras would follow them. Based on your knowledge from a few clips, it was sort of like a voyeuristic look into the world of the rich and famous—who just so happened to be in love with each other. 

Your stomach grumbled at a good time, and you padded over to the kitchen, humming lightly. Rin’s scene was scripted to start from the home gym where he would be doing a set of reps, designed to emphasise his intense dedication to soccer. On your end, you were the supportive, slightly exasperated significant other who prepared a meticulous breakfast for your boyfriend in the hopes he would pay attention to his health.  

You started out with some fresh fruits, chopping them up and blending strawberries, blueberries and kiwis together for a vitamin-C rich smoothie. Next, you got a handful of granola and placed them in a bowl topped with some yoghurt.

“Morning.”

Rin’s voice, scripted out to sound loving, greeted you and you turned to smile at him. His teal eyes were soft, expression hazy to show a man utterly in love with his girlfriend. 

“Morning,” you murmured, and handed him his breakfast. Despite the numerous people on set, you couldn’t help but rake your eyes up and down his bare body. You were sure the comments online later would catch this bit and gush at how you were checking out your “boyfriend’s” physique.

“Thank you for the food,” he murmured, and shot you a small smile.

You returned it with a nod and a grin. “You better eat up, Rinny. I have some repairs I need your help with.”

He pretended to grumble, sitting at the kitchen counter with his bowl of granola in hand. “You’re always making me work, woman. I want to rest.”

In retaliation for his sour retort, you stood on your tiptoes and pecked his cheek. “Don’t you go acting like Nagi now. Otherwise, Ego-san will have a handful with two lazy players.”

Rin glowered playfully and poked your side. “Fine. Let me handle that later.”

Thankfully, the streaming would take about half an hour for them to highlight important bits of the episode when Rin fixed a conveniently “broken” shower head, and then, you both would be taken away separately on a short confessional regarding this entire relationship to intersperse it with the final cut. 

Your turn came up soon, and when the interviewer sat you down, you suddenly felt too nervous. However, your expression schooled into a bright smile when the cameras started to roll.

“So, Y/N,” the man with a slicked back pompadour and heavy cologne asked. “How did you and Itoshi-san meet?” 

You pretended to look away shyly and avoid the camera’s lens. “Oh. Um. Wow—uh, okay. We met at a record shop and debated about Green Day for a bit. He had very, um, high standards for music, and I was trying to convince him that my taste in music wasn’t as bad as it seemed.” 

A pretend laugh, and the corners of the interviewer’s eyes crinkled in pleasant surprise. “I had no idea it would lead to him asking me out on a date and, well, here we are.”

“Aww.” You could just picture the other viewers cooing along with him. “That is so cute! What do you like the most about him—and remember, please keep it PG!”

You chuckled along with his innuendo and remained bashful. “Um, I really like how he—” you paused, suddenly coming up blank; the string of designated answers you were supposed to give eluding you. The red camera light flashed, waiting for your response. You cleared your throat. 

“I like how strong he is,” you finally confessed, and this time, it was not the repertoire of answers Ego and your father sanctioned for you to give. You were speaking from the depths of your heart. “Many people may see Rin-san as a cold, aloof man, but behind it all, he’s a person who has strong principles and goals. Sometimes, it may rub people the wrong way, but Rin doesn’t mean any harm. He wants what is best for himself and others around him, especially his Blue Lock team.” You ended your confessional with a short laugh. “I guess that’s what I like the most about him—his unwavering passion for the things he loves in his life.”

Your segment ended with a round of bows and expressed gratitude. You did not see Rin emerge from his own confessional, and you wondered what he would say about you. If he could even say anything about you. 

Anri took your arm and gave you a warm smile. “You did great. Your father told me to congratulate you.”

Your smile was paper thin and you nodded weakly. I just want to go back to bed.

Finally, Rin emerged from the guest bedroom where he had his segment, and the production house called it a wrap. The equipment was stowed away, the place cleaned and finally, you both had the apartment back to yourself.

Funnily enough, you and Rin both sagged onto the couch at the same time, exhausted from the unexpected ambush Ego and your father set on you two. He turned to face you, unexpectedly asking how your confessional went.

“Did you tell them the correct story of how we met?” 

You nodded, closing your eyes for a second. “Yup. The record store story.”

Rin paused. “Oh. I fibbed on the first date because I forgot what Ego said but I mentioned the second one. The—”

“Museum date,” you both said at the same time.

“Yup,” you murmured. “That’s fine. You’re a man, you’re allowed to forget stuff like this. They won’t crucify you for it.”

Evidently done with this awkward conversation, you stood up and stretched. “I want to go back to sleep. You do whatever you want to do.”

For the second time, Rin hesitated. You found you were growing intimately acquainted with his quirks at an alarming rate; first his eyes would glimmer with uncertainty, his brow would furrow and then his mouth parted as if he was about to ask a question.

You didn’t want to speak to him after what he said last night, and turned on your heel before he could say anything else to ruin your mood.

Despite your exhaustion, you could not fall back asleep. You tossed and turned while the morning sun streamed through the curtains, only to sit up at the smell of something tantalising from the kitchen. The last thing you expected was Rin to be cooking at the stove, in his simple shirt and shorts combo, the combination of sunlight and shadows bringing attention to his toned thighs.

You rubbed your eyes, smudging a little of the undereye concealer as a shuddering yawn overtook you. “What did you make?” 

He turned around and regarded you neutrally. “Katsu curry. I know it’s your favourite.”

How did he know? You never told him that. 

“It was in your profile,” he murmured curtly, answering your silent question. “Now, eat. You barely had anything yesterday.” 

Rin set a plate down in front of you, and you eyed it apprehensively. “Did you poison it?” 

His glare was back and he crossed his arms. The sight would’ve been more frightening if his tousled dark green hair was not sticking up at odd ends, evidence of him struggling to figure out how this high-tech kitchen operated. 

“No. And even if I did, I wouldn't waste poison on you. It probably cost a bomb. Now,” he scoffed. “Eat.” 

You picked up your chopsticks, grumbling bossy asshole under your breath. But, you thanked him for the meal and bit into the first scoop of rice and curry, surprised to find how good it was. You ate heartily, pausing to scrape the remaining curry from the plate and down it with your last scoop of rice. 

Rin let you wash up, and he was back on the sofa, reading a book. You paused, unsure if he wanted to be interrupted since he was staring intently at the pages. Curiosity won, and turned to fire off your question. “Aren’t you going to train today?”

“It’s Sunday,” he rebuked curtly. “The training centre is closed.”

Oh. You struggled to return back to your task, suddenly feeling foolish.

“Don’t you… don’t you have anything to do today?” 

Your repetitive motion of scrubbing the plates ceased, and you set the sponge back in its container. Was the Itoshi Rin actually trying to make conversation with you? 

“Nah,” you murmured after a beat of hesitation. “I’m going to chill today and do some skincare.”

“Oh.” Another drag of silence. “Can I do it with you?” 

This time, you did not hesitate to gape at him, soap suds clinging to your hands. “Uh. Why?” 

He pointed to his skin, as if it would give you the answer you needed. When you didn’t get it, he huffed in frustration. “Clogged pores,” Rin murmured. “Help me with it?” 

You supposed there was a first time for everything. Like how you were currently standing above Rin who was leaning his head back, two eye mask patches resting snuggly on his face and your jade roller gently de-puffing his cheeks and chin.

“I never understood what that shit did,” he grumbled, gesturing to your roller. You snorted and angled it to his neck, rolling it upwards to pull his skin taut. 

“It’s supposed to tighten your skin and drain your lymph nodes.”

“My what?” 

You sighed. “Men just don’t understand.”

Rin’s skin was surprisingly soft as you worked an exfoliating scrub on the planes of his face. “Don’t you have some expensive esthetician to help you with this,” it was your turn to grumble.

“It’s Sunday,” he growled, like it would give you an answer to your question. You snapped your mouth shut and continued to scrub his pores clean of any gunk.

When you were done, Rin checked his skin out in the grand bathroom’s mirror and nodded. 

“Nice. Thanks.”

“Welcome,” you mumbled and started on yourself. Rin remained seated on the plush makeup bench, watching you work without saying a word. You paused from scooping out your LaMer scrub and darted your eyes to him. “Anything else I missed?” 

He shrugged. “I want to take notes.” 

Such a weird dude. You didn’t question his strangeness and continued with your motions. Occasionally, Rin would glance at his phone, but his attention would return to you. How meticulous you were with your skin reminded him of how some of the guys had a strict pre-game ritual they always committed to.

It was strange to see this sort of diligence and dedication outside of the field.

“My job demands this,” you murmured, taking him quietly by surprise. How did you know exactly what he was thinking?

“I have to always look good for the camera no matter what so I cultivated this really strict skincare routine,” you said frankly. “It sucks, but I have to always be on top of my game.” You flickered your gaze momentarily to his broad and muscular frame. “I’m sure you understand what that dedication is like.”

Rin cleared his throat and nodded, unsure why your little motion of checking him out left his cheeks feeling a little too warm. It made him feel insecure, and he quickly stood up, backing out of the bathroom with a low mumble of gotta train.

You tried to ignore him and took your time in making yourself feel better through these little acts of selfcare. Despite this uneasy truce between you and him, you weren’t sure when the other shoe would drop; when he would revert back to his condescending mannerisms and scald you with his sharp tongue.

Time passed on and you were finally done, stepping out of the bathroom in time to run into one very sweaty and half-naked Rin.

“Wh—!” 

“Watch it,” he grumbled, steadying you. 

Ugh! You clapped your hands to your eyes, shrieking when the sight of his bulging abs and flexing biceps burned into your eyes. You stepped back from him, and shook your head from side to side as if to rid yourself of the image of his bare body seemingly ingrained on your lids. “Will it kill you to wear a shirt once in a while?!” 

“I’m at home.” You didn’t have to look at him to know he was scowling. Sometimes, you wondered if he had any other facial expressions besides those tinged in anger and insolence. “I don’t need to dress up.”

“You’re insufferable.” You peeled your hands away from your face to give him a mutinous glare. “I thought you made it clear you didn’t want to stay a single second here.” With me. 

Rin narrowed his teal eyes, his chest puffing with anger. “Huh? Why do you care?” 

Because you basically told me you didn’t like me yesterday. You bit your tongue before you could spill those incriminating words; they would have to send you to Guantanamo Bay to get that bit of information out of you. 

You would rather burn off your fingernails than admit to Itoshi Rin that you hated how he didn’t want to be your friend. This went against the laws of nature. Everyone in your life liked you; even if they found you ditzy and comically dense, you had people that genuinely cared for you. 

Unlike Rin. His bad manners and even worst temper got the better of you; made you think he hated you with his entire soul.

You stepped back and crossed your arms. “I don’t. I just thought you made it clear that you and I both can’t be friends.” 

Rin paused for a few short seconds and instead of apologising for what he said last night, his glare deepened. “Are you fucking expect me to say sorry? You started it. I was only being truthful.”

“You were being a dick.”

“A truthful one.” He mumbled, rolling his eyes. “Look. In what world can you and I be friends? I think not. We can be civil, but I sure as hell do not want to be your friend.”

The people–pleaser inside of you gasped in offence; the hurt rearing its ugly head. 

“Fine. I didn’t want to be your friend, either. You’re too blunt and mean, I can see why you don’t have anyone in the first place.”

You hadn’t expected such simple words to touch a nerve. Rin’s temper flared and he growled—actually growled—grabbing your arm and walking back into the opposite wall. He pressed you to the cool surface and his even cooler eyes bored into your wide ones. 

“Don’t you ever fucking shut up?” he demanded, nostrils flaring. “All you do is fucking whine and whine. Why don’t you get drunk and die in a ditch or something? It would make both our lives way easier.”

Your shoulders fell, and you didn’t expect his harsh words to elicit such hurt in your soul. The fog of anger clouding his mind parted slightly to give him snatches of his self-consciousness back, and he realised a second too late that your eyes were glimmering with tears.

“Hey—”

You pushed him aside roughly, dashing at your eyes. The emptiness in your soul throbbed, missing the shape of her—a mother you had little memories of because like what Rin said, she got drunk and died before you could even walk.

“Y/N—” he reached for your wrist and you let your temper take over, the loud sound of your palm meeting his cheek echoing in the silence of this penthouse. His face snapped to the side, cheek throbbing. Did she just fucking hit me—?

Rin’s teal eyes were narrowed slits, his teeth bared, but when it dawned on him that you were sobbing, that famed temper he was known for suddenly ebbed away, like water drying under a scorching sun. Your eyes were red-rimmed, and your chest was heaving up and down violently, holding back your cresting emotions and tears. 

“Fuck you, Itoshi.” 

Your hoarse whisper surprisingly made him hurt more than your slap, and before he could reach for you, to tell you he didn’t mean those words, you stormed away from him, shoving your arms into your hoodie and slamming the door shut behind you.

Itoshi Rin was a man who cared little for anyone around him.

His whole life was centred around games and goals and rising above high enough so it was Sae’s turn to look up at him. 

And in this instance, he wondered if this unhealthy single-mindedness was the right thing to nurture when he couldn’t even find the right words to name the sinking pit he felt in the middle of his chest. 

The same one which echoed in the shape of your absence. 

tagging: @chronic-claire-universe @simpfully-heartbroken

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