Things That I Needed To Hear But Never Did (Part Two):

Things That I Needed To Hear But Never Did (Part Two):

- Someone loves you, somewhere. Even if you feel like they don't. They do. They do. I promise you, they do.

- You're important to someone. You're just as important to someone as they are you. To them, you are the first choice.

- Nothing is wrong with you. There is no coding that needs to be fixed.

- You are you, and that is so great and so important, and you are unique and original. No one could ever replace you.

- Someone will fall for you as much as you fall for them. Those sappy notes and letters you write? Someone will do the same for you.

- Hugs are important. Physical affection is important. Not everything results in you getting hurt.

- Someone would die for you as much as you would them.

- You matter in someone else's world. You are apart of their story as they are yours.

- You can and will be found.

- The darkness isn't forever.

- If you disappear, someone will go on a journey to find you.

- There will be someone that will never, ever leave you despite anything you say or go through.

"I told you I loved you 500 times. I proved it too. Over and over, every little action, I made sure it counted. It took everything out of my heart. I poured it out for you, and then I waited for you to pour yours out for me.

Then you said it.

Those three words.

Right back to me.

I swear I blacked out, but I remember it crystal clear.

As time went by, I saw you with the others. How your smile was brighter, your laugh louder, you genuinely loved everyone and everything. But with me? It all toned down. I shifted you. It felt like you shut me out. But then I realized it. Whether it was you ignoring me or avoiding me, I got the message. And then I felt it. The storm. I cried for weeks. You never noticed.

I loved you.

You said you loved me.

You

Liar. "

- Dreaming of Wolves // Liar

"It's a sad truth that I will write about everyone I love, but none of them will even try and put me into a sentence."

- Dreaming of Wolves

I never really got a childhood. Sure, I had a beginning, but a troubled one. I became an escapist from day one, always flying to my imaginary world instead of the real one. I didn't like reality, and frankly, I still don't because of the people inside them. I had to grow up too fast. They pushed me into the blinding reality, and I got hurt. They laughed when I fell in my hole, and they never helped me get back out. I never forgave them for that. Now, as I look back, my beginning was stolen, my middle was me realizing it, and what will my end be? All I want is a happily ever after, something of fairy tales. I want to be the girl raised by wolves, or protected by the forest creatures. I want to find someone who makes me feel so loved I won't even have to doubt it anymore. I need something to prove me wrong that my end won't be as tragic as how it all was written in the start. It's time I pick up the pencil. It's time I start rewriting my life.

- Dreaming of Wolves// Short Stories

Personality Quirks/Quirks in General I Have:

-Flinch at physical contact

-Can't navigate for the life of me, but once I have a path down, I will never not go that path

-Can't solve most school locks

-Always paranoid that someone is going to hurt me. Mostly stab or shoot me.

-Paranoid of people behind me, that's why I never turn my back on people. Literally.

-Can't eat in front of people because I'm messy, and another reason.

-Literally the most mess of a person you will ever meet.

-I use literally too much.

-I cry over everything. I know I'm over emotional.

-But some reason, can't show weakness in front of strangers/my parents.

-I have a very, very good long term and short term memory.

-I always have a weird way of thinking and cannot follow the way teachers teach me.

-Due to my number phobia, both clocks and math are hard for me to deal with.

-Seriously. I have no idea what goes on during math. I just pretend to know what I'm doing.

-And also, I have a schedule for sleeping due to the phobia of numbers.

-I need every friend of mine to give me a gift, preferably a plushie, once we get close because I need something that reminds me of them + bares their smell in case I lose that person.

-I am too much of a perfectionist and can't stand when things are out of order.

-If the house is messy/my room, I can't work, sleep, and I become restless.

-I have a MASSIVE fear of losing my friends/my friends being killed my enemies.

-That's why I'm overprotective of them.

-I wear my heart on my sleeve too much, and always get broken in the end.

-I either trust completely or not at all, there's no in between.

-I have two personalities, the way I see me, and the way my friends see me. Both are very accurate to who I am.

-I constantly struggle with balance in my life.

-If you are my enemy, yoU'RE GOING DOWN. I will not let you hurt my friends. Ever. Fight me.

-I have an overwhelming fear of school shootings/mass shootings and always prepare myself for one.

-I watch scary documentaries and then go to sleep and have nightmares.

-I count nightmares as just dreams.

-I remember all of my dreams. I frequently lucid dream, but just see what happens instead of controlling myself.

-I seem chill, but I'm super uptight.

-I am drawn to people that have the "bad boy" look.

-I read too many X Readers because I need to feel loved.

-I love people watching.

-When I have a crush, I'll stalk them online.

-Animals always consider me their mate for some reason??

A List of Things That Signal I'm Sad or Feeling Something Very Deeply (But I Won't Ever Tell You-):

- I start being very short with you. Instead of thoughtful sentences, you only get (Oh. Oh cool. Ha. Etc.)

- I start having a very pessimistic drop in my tone

- I start changing the convo

- I start changing the topic to you rather than me

- I take longer to reply

- I use hhhhh a lot

**In irl**

- I avoid your eyes

- My posture drops

- I start fidgeting

- I stay silent

- I rest my head and just look like someone who got stabbed