dorotheataylor - Old habits Die Screaming
Old habits Die Screaming

18 | a simp for fictional characters | Delusional AF | I write fics to feed my delusions

93 posts

Begin Again

Begin Again

Pairing- Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader

Summary- Based on Begin Again (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift <3

Warnings- Slight angst, kissing, a lot of Fluff and as always my poor english :)

Word count- 1.6k

A/N- Long time no see people. So here I am with a Fred Weasley fic coz I love this dork sm. Also this happens after the war and yes Fred is alive coz he never died (im delusional)

Begin Again

It was Wednesday, probably your least favourite day of the week. You were getting ready for work, deciding to wear heels for today.

“Don’t wear them, they don’t look good on you.” Your ex-boyfriend would have said if he were here. You sighed and looked into the mirror.

“But I look good in them.” You smiled at yourself before leaving. You decided to walk to the ministry for today rather than apparating, stopping by a cafe to grab a quick morning coffee for a head start for the day. Your headphones played a song you loved.

“I don’t get this song.” Your ex-boyfriend would’ve commented if he were here. You shook your head and smiled through the song.

“But I do.”

As you walked towards the cafe, you suddenly bumped into someone who was much taller than you. The things they were carrying dropped on the floor as you quickly bent down to pick them up, removing your headphones from ears to your neck, apologies never stopping to leave from your mouth.

“I’m really sorry for not paying attention, hope I didn’t break anything.” You said, finally looking at the stranger’s face as you gave them the last thing you picked.

It was a man. A really good looking and tall man. He had red hair, which were perfectly messed up, his smile looking genuine as he smiled at you.

“It’s alright.” The handsome stranger said, “I hadn’t been paying attention as well. Reckon its partly my fault too.”

Damn, you could listen to his voice forever if you could. It was as clear as crystal water, as smooth as silk.

If it had been your ex-boyfriend, he would’ve gotten mad. Mad that because of you he dropped his things. He would’ve cursed at you, maybe even yell. You shook your head and quickly came out of your thoughts.

“Guess we’re both sorry then.” You said, trying not get awkward. He chuckled and extended his free hand.

“I’m Fred, Fred Weasley.”

-

Three weeks later on a Wednesday, you walked inside the same cafe, half expecting that Fred wouldn’t arrive. But you were immediately proven wrong when you saw him, already standing near a table, waiting for you.

He waved at you when he saw you and gestured for you to sit across from him. You walked towards him, sitting down as he pulled out the chair for you. He didn’t know how nice this gesture was but you did.

You small talked about everything. You attempted to make jokes about things to which he responded with throwing his head back laughing like a little kid. “That was the funniest thing someone has ever said to me.” He said.

You were surprised at his response. “It wasn’t even funny, why do you even try to be funny when you’re not?” Your ex-boyfriend would’ve said if it were him instead of Fred.

As your conversation went on, you thought that maybe not all relationships are the way your previous ones were. Maybe some included this. Happiness. Because today, on Wednesday, in this cafe, you watched your feelings begin again.

-

“I’ve never met someone who has the collection of all the chocolate frog cards.” He had said laughing a little when you showed him your card collection. “Well except my brother Ron of course. This is impressive.”

You had smiled and responded, “thanks. I’ve liked chocolate frogs since I first ate them on my way to Hogwarts, back in first year.”

“I kind of figured, it’s cute if you ask me.” He had smiled, making you blush.

He had been telling you about himself and his family. You had been listening intently and laughing every time he told you about the pranks he had played on other students along with his brother George, back when he was in Hogwarts.

You told him about yourself, getting shy occasionally which he couldn’t comprehend why, but you did. He was the sweetest man you had ever talked to.

He eventually took you to meet his family. You were a nervous wreck, to which he had assured you that there was nothing to worry about and his family especially his mother were going to love you.

And he was right. His mother, Molly Weasley who was also a redhead welcomed you as if you were her own. His father, Arthur Weasley was also genuinely interested in knowing about your work. He had asked you many questions related to your work field, making you smile a little as you didn’t really have anyone who was interested in what you did.

His siblings were all friendly towards you. You had immediately gotten along with George, which made Fred smile to himself. You had even given some advices on how they can improve their shop works. Ron showed you his chocolate frog card collection and told you how he still had some missing. You offered yours to him to which he smiled and agreed happily. Ginny treated you as her sister, very much interested in getting to know you more.

You liked the Weasleys, and the fact they accepted you made both you and Fred happy. He had kissed your forehead once you reached your doorstep, after he had insisted on walking you home. That night neither you nor Fred slept, replaying the moment you spent together.

-

Christmas was around the corner and snow had started to gather everywhere. Everyone you could see were busy shopping for holidays.

You were in a shop, buying gifts for Fred and his family. You smiled when you saw the things that Fred had talked about many times and how much he would love it if got it. You made your way to pay, the cashier surprised to see you buying gifts.

“You’re buying gifts for yourself?” he asked. You and the cashier had been friends for many years as you were a frequent customer in his store.

“No, they’re for my- friend and his family.” you had hesitated because you two hadn’t made anything official. Hell was there anything even to make it official? You thought.

The cashier smiled, “explains why you look better than before since last few weeks. Finally got someone right?”

You smiled and nodded back at him and said, “I’m giving love a chance to begin again.”

-

You and Fred were walking back to your house, hand in hand as he small talked about everything. You hadn’t been paying attention, your mind going back to your ex-boyfriend.

You didn’t remember anytime when you and him were like this, peaceful and most of all- happy.

You decided to tell Fred about him so you said, “I wanted to-”

“I wanted to-” he said at same time as you, making both of you laugh.

“You first.” You said.

“I wanted to tell you that my mother wants me to invite you home for the Christmas dinner.” He said sheepishly rubbing his neck.

“I don’t know, Fred. Christmas dinner is for families and-”

He interrupted, “But you’re a part of the family now. Please come, Y/N. I’ll feel better if you did. Plus we’ll get a jumper knitted by my mother herself with our initials on it. It's a family tradition for every Christmas."

"Okay, I'll be there." You said with a smile. Fred grinned widely and kissed your cheek in excitement making you a flustered mess and you thanked Merlin for the cold.

You forgot all about your ex-boyfriend as Fred went on to tell you stories of pranks he played on Ron with George. You had a small smile on your face as you listened to him, and for the first time you thought 'what happened in the past stays in the past'.

-

It was New Year's Eve and you and Fred were decorating your house for the party later tonight. He watched you as you were focused on shaping the cookie dough to bake. Your tongue was grazing your upper lip, ounces of flour around your forehead.

He blushed and looked away when you caught him staring and resumed his work, smiling to himself.

Night came on and the party was in full swing. Fred and George were entertaining the guests with the products from their joke shop. Ginny and Hermione helped you serve the drinks as Ron and Harry small talked, drinks in their hands.

And the time came for which everyone was waiting. The new year countdown. Everyone gathered around near the clock as it ticked. Suddenly, Fred took you by your hand and led you to the balcony.

People started counting backwards as Fred took your hands in his. He looked nervous and your heart couldn't help but pick up its pace.

"10!"

"Y/N, I've known you for almost an year now and I don't think I can deny it any longer."

"7"

"You have always been so kind to others but never to yourself. So I want to be the one to take care of you. You have showed me many times what I'm worth of. You showed me a new way to view life."

"5!"

"Fred, what are you saying?" You asked, quietly.

"3!

"I'm saying that I love you, Y/N. All of you. And I'll never get tired of admitting it. Be my girlfriend, Y/N."

"1!"

You didn't say anything as tears fell down your cheeks. You grabbed him by his collars and attached your lips with his. He immediately wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you closer when you heard everyone screaming.

"Happy New Year!"

Fred and you smiled into the kiss as he sealed the promise of never hurting you by deepening the kiss. Surely you have had some bad relationships but it was all worth it if it had brought you to Fred Weasley, the redhead which made your belief in love begin again.

______________________________________________________________

Ah I loved writing this. Thank you for reading!

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More Posts from Dorotheataylor

1 year ago

realest thing i saw this month

maybe i was born to read fanfic and obsess over fictional men idk

1 year ago

imma just leave this here </3

these dating apps are stupid. where is my academic rival who 3 years later of meeting me, confesses in a love letter, that I'm the fond object of all their desires and the keeper of the key to their heart? where is the lover who builts a fire just to keep me warm? where is the person who secretly reads my favourite books and gets so invested in them just because they observed my bright enthusiasm about them? where is the person who lays in the grass with me to discuss an impromptu script while also talking about our general interests and knows that in the end we're gonna end up with each other? where is the person who gives up the opportunity to have an iPod in exchange of a teapot that contains lil inside jokes we've had going on since years? where is the person who runs to the station just to take me to the place which captures the most enchanting sunrise before i leave the city forever? where is the person who sings their favourite songs with me in a train with a shared earphone? where is the person who saves their dirtiest jokes for me while i save a seat on every table for them? where is the person who after knowing my flaws and fears, says yes to running away with me? where is the person who would come out of Eden to open the door for me if they knew i were there? where is the person who makes me realise that our joy is so bright I cannot see anything beyond it? where's the person who'd choose to hang out with me in every universe? who's going to take me to the lakes where all the poets went to die? where is the bestfriend who looks at me in the eyes and says "this thing we're doing here, me, you- i just want you to know I'm in. I'm all in." and means it!?

1 year ago

Lover

Pairing- Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader

Summary- Listen to Lover by Taylor Swift

Warnings- FLUFF FLUFF FLUFFF, established relationship, really really small adult talk, this is really cliché, no curses!au, modern!au, my poor english, reader and satoru are so in love :( (i wanna cry) Based on Lover by Taylor Swift <3

Word Count- 2.7k words (excluding lyrics)

A/N- The amount of love I have for this man is insane. Gege when I catch you Gege!! Anyways this is something I imagine everyday with this man and decided why not share this with y’all? Hope y’all like this!

Lover

"Good morning Toru," you said in a sleepy voice as you rubbed your eyes.

Satoru smiled and said, "Good morning, my love," placing the coffee mugs on the nightstand nearby and leaning down to kiss you. You kissed him back for a moment but then immediately pulled away.

He looked at you with a frown and you spoke, "you know I have a very bad breath in the morning."

His frown suddenly turned into the grin you adored so much. "And you know that I don't care," he said before leaning down once more and kissing you. And this time you didn't resist.

You snuggled up into him to cuddle. He wrapped his hands around you as he laid beside you.

We could leave the Christmas lights up ‘till January

This is our place, we make the rules

"Happy new year," you beamed before moving even closer (if possible) to him. His body was warm- the body heat you’d always miss when you woke up in bed without him engulfing you.

"Well there's still some couple of hours left," he chuckled before kissing your forehead, "but happy new year."

Although the Christmas tree was gone by now- from the holiday a week ago- multiple strings of Christmas lights remained hung up on the living room walls. Turned off, the fluorescent lights were more gloomy than cheerful due to the festivities being over.

It being the first Christmas with Satoru in the new apartment, the one you both collectively bought together just over six months ago, the holiday was a milestone for your relationship. Decorating the small apartment was fun, placing ornaments carefully on the tree with Satoru while he broke over half of them; accidentally of course.

And now the lights remained, hung up on the walls of the open living room. While you took the first sip of the coffee- the caffeine sliding down your throat and almost scorching your tongue- it was as if Satoru read your mind.

“The Christmas lights are still up, we forgot about them.” There had always been a mysterious way about him, always seeming to know what you were thinking or feeling at any given time.

You'd heard of him in your university days. The uni heartthrob, star basketball player and the guy of every girl's dreams studying with you. Your friend would go on about him every now and then until she found her 'the one' as she called it.

You had to admit that you'd grown a crush on him too but you were too scared. He was the popular guy every girl swooned over, and then there was you, just managing to get through the uni. You doubted if he even knew about your existence. So you never worked on your feelings and just continued the way you lived.

The first time you officially met and talked with him was on the annual prom night. You were sitting alone, trying to get a shot as you watched everyone, including your best friend, dance on the slow song playing in the background.

You'd come there without a date as no one had asked you. You were slightly upset but your friend cheered you up, ditching her own boyfriend to go with you. But after a few hours of having fun, she wanted to spend time with him and of course you didn't mind.

So here you were, deep in thoughts and didn't notice someone coming up to you until the person spoke.

"Hey."

You immediately knew who's voice it was. You turned your head to look at them. And there he stood, dressed up in a black tuxedo, his white hair perfectly styled and faint blush on his cheeks as he showed his smile. Your heart started to pick up its pace as your cheeks heated up. Why would they not? Satoru Gojo, the popular guy of the whole campus and your long time crush, was talking to you.

"Hey," you replied, surprised and internally relieved you didn't stutter.

"Mind if I join you?" he said gesturing over the empty seat besides you.

"Not at all." You said and handed him a drink as he took the seat.

You were surprised, that 'The Gojo Satoru' would be so sweet and awkward at the same time. Still you two talked and got to know each other. Apparently, his date ditched him when he refused for PDA, and he claimed to enjoy your company more.

Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?

He almost got shy when he asked you for a dance. But you still accepted nevertheless. And let's just say it was the best time of your life. Neither of you two knew how to dance and all the time you were just stepping on each other's foot or just laughing your asses off. You knew you'd just met him but it felt like you'd known him for years.

The night ended with him asking you out. You gladly accepted. And with that, started a beautiful love story one could only ask for.

“I think we should leave them up,” a quizzing look you gave him with your eyebrows prompted him to explain, “you know, ‘cause why not? We’re adults, we don’t have to listen to any rules anymore, right?”

You laughed. “I guess I see your point... but it’s already New Year’s Day, and Christmas was a week ago. If others come around, what will they say?”

"Who cares, this is our place. Meaning," he held you tighter and continued, "we make the rules here. We could live it 'til the next January."

"You're crazy, Gojo." You said playfully and he rolled his eyes.

"Well sorry to break it to you sweetheart but you're stuck with me," he said with a little smirk.

"Wouldn't have it another way." You said giggling and giving him a quick peck on lips before getting out of the bed. As you were about to leave, he held your wrist and pulled you back. You landed back on the bed as he held you tightly once again.

"Let's just stay like this for the whole day." He said as he closed his eyes.

You giggled, "’Toru, if you don't let me go then we won't be getting any breakfast today."

"I don't care." He said as he buried his face in your chest, "you're warm and I want cuddles." You laughed at his childish behaviour and cuddled back with him. You slowly ran your fingers in his hair just the way he liked. He groaned at the feeling and hugged you even tighter.

There was a comfortable and peaceful silence until he said, "by the way I already made us breakfast."

You widened your eyes when you heard him. "Really? I'm surprised the house is not on fire yet."

He sat up and rolled his eyes. "You know I'm a better cook than you."

You hit him playfully on his chest as he laughed. He got out of the bed and went into the kitchen and you went to the bathroom and quickly brushed your teeth, excited to see what he had prepared for both of you.

He came back with two plates of honey-drizzled pancakes. You were sitting on the bed by then and your mouth immediately started watering after seeing the pancakes.

"Tell me how it is." He said after putting down the plates. You took a bite before widening your eyes and looking at him proudly.

"I see you've gotten my recipe perfectly." You said wiggling your eyebrows making him chuckle.

He chuckled, his eyes shining with satisfaction. "I wanted to do something different this time. You're always the one making breakfast, so I thought I'd give it a try and show you that I can make your recipes too. Consider it my New Year's resolution. Plus I know how much you hate to get out of the bed in the morning, so breakfast is now my duty."

Your heart melted at his thoughtful gesture. He had gone out of his way to make you happy, to bring a change to their routine. It was a small act, but it spoke volumes about his love and dedication. You couldn't help but fall in love with him even more if possible.

Moved by his sincerity, you leaned in and kissed him passionately, feeling the warmth of his embrace. In that moment, your connection deepened, your love reaffirmed. Your lips gently parted, and your foreheads touched as you locked eyes, sharing an unspoken language of love and understanding.

You’re my my my my Lover.

"You don't have to do anything special to make me happy." You whispered, "as long as you're with me, I'm content."

A smile graced his lips, and he spoke softly, "I love you."

"I love you too. More than words can express." You said before attaching your lips with his once again.

-

"Cheers to the New Year!" echoed throughout the room as everyone joyously raised their glasses and took hearty sips of their drinks. The lively party was in full swing, with conversations overlapping and laughter filling the air. To your right, was a group engaged in a spirited drinking game, while in a quieter corner, a few couples were making out while Satoru and Suguru shared jokes and laughter near the balcony, relishing their drinks.

I’m highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

You tried to focus on the conversation you were having with your friends but failed miserably. All you could see was the unfamiliar girl who was now flirting with Satoru. He looked like he had no clue about it. Beside him, was his friend Suguru. Unlike your boyfriend, he noticed the dirty glances you were throwing at the girl.

You see him nudge Satoru with his elbow and point your way. Your eyes met his blue ones for a moment when you instantly looked away. You didn’t want to admit that you were jealous but god you couldn’t help it.

I’ve loved you three summer now honey but I want ‘em all

He was so gorgeous with his soft white hair and cold blue eyes that any girl would fall for him. But those cold eyes only showed warmth and love when they looked at you. You were the only one Satoru loved and will continue to do so till the end of time.

You looked at him again only to see him smirk. Can’t able to bear the sight of it, you decided to take matters into your own hands.

You excused yourself from your friends and walked over to where Satoru was standing. “Darling, It’s getting late. We should head home.” You said in a saccharine voice with a forced smile. Not waiting for his reply, you pulled him by his arm. The last thing you heard before exiting the venue was some words of 'good luck' directed towards Satoru by Suguru.

When you got into the car, you immediately turned towards the windows, not in the mood to talk. Satoru got inside and smiled at your behaviour.

When you got home, you both had to run inside because it had started raining. You immediately went to the bathroom to get dressed for bed, without sparing Satoru a look. After you were done, you laid on your bed and pretended to fall asleep.

Satoru, very well knowing that you were awake, gave your shoulder a nudge. “Y/N?”

"Go away, I'm trying to sleep."

“I highly doubt that. Is it something I said?”

“No.”

“Then what is it?”

“Well, I wasn’t the one who was totally oblivious to a girl hitting on me when my girlfriend stood just a few steps away.” You scoffed as you sat up.

“You can’t be serious.” He chuckled.

“Of course, I am.”

“Baby, look at me.” He said. When you didn’t listen to him, he cupped your face and made you look at him. He looked straight into your eyes and said, “You know you’re the only one for me, right? You’re the one who I’m deeply in love with.”

When you didn't say anything, he sighed and stood up. "Come with me." He said giving you his hand.

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my Loverr

You looked at him confused but took it nevertheless. "Why are we going outside? It's raining." You said when you noticed you were being led outside the house.

Satoru knew how much you loved the rain. That’s why if he was going to do this, he’ll do this with the things you loved.

You were still trying to comprehend as to why you were in the rain but you didn’t complain. You loved rain. It helped you calm down and helped relaxing your mind.

Satoru led you in your small house garden. You had already started getting soaked from the rain as you asked, “Why are we here?”

And you’ll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

“Why? Getting wet already?” he said as you rolled your eyes and laughed. He smiled at you. He swore his heart swells every time he hears you laugh or sees you smile, especially when he is the reason behind it.

“Let’s dance.” He said and spun you around. You laughed when he pulled you towards him and tried to waltz.

“You’re still a terrible dancer.” You said jokingly.

“Well you’re the only one who gets to dance with me so I suggest you get used to it.” He said, trying his best not to mess up the steps.

“Did you learn the basics of waltzing?” you asked when you saw him doing correct steps.

“Well, I know you love to dance and I’m a terrible dancer. So I tried learning just so you can have, not excellent but at least an average dance partner.” He said, scratching his neck sheepishly.

And at every table, I’ll save you a seat Loverr

You didn’t know that you could fall for him even more. He learned to dance, just for you. He knew you loved to dance so he tried to become better at it, just for you. You knew how hectic his schedule can get but still he took some time off it to learn how to dance, just for you. You loved this man so much and you’ll never get tired of admitting this.

Can I go where you go?

“There’s still something I need to do.” He said, now sounding somewhat nervous.

You raised an eyebrow and looked at him in suspicion, “what is it?”

You didn’t want to think the worse but with the way he was behaving, you couldn’t help it. Is this it? Is he going to break things off? You didn’t know how you will survive if your thoughts came true.

Can we always be this close?

He took a deep breath before reaching for his pocket and taking out a small box. He bent down on his knees and held open the box in front of you. You widened your eyes at sight before you and gasped when you realised what was happening.

“Y/N, I never knew I could love someone as much as I love you. You’re the ride and die for me, the one who is everything to me, the one who’s laugh and smiles makes my day, the one who’s tears break my heart, the one who will always own my heart. And I can’t believe that you love an idiot like me. I want you to be the first and only love for me. I want you to be the one who lights up my day with just a smile, who makes my nights beautiful with just a touch.”

Forever and ever and Ah

“I want to be the one for you who you’ll spend forever with just like you have always dreamed of. I don’t want to spend another minute without you being by my side.”

You’re my my my my

“So Y/N L/N, will you marry me?” he finished, tears falling from his eyes. You didn’t know when you started crying but this moment was the best moment of your entire life. You practically jumped on Satoru as you hugged him.

Oh you’re my my my my

“Yes, yes a million times yes!” you said in between your tears as Satoru hugged you back. When you pulled away, he slowly slipped the ring onto your ring finger.

You immediately leaned in and kissed him, pouring all your unsaid love into this kiss. He kissed you back with the same passion as you. You felt like you fell for him all over again. The love story that started long back when you were in university, when you never thought he even knew your existence, when you never thought he’ll notice you, when you never thought he would even speak yet alone dance with you. And you definitely didn’t think that out of everyone, Gojo Satoru was ‘The One’ for you. But even after everything, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Happy new year, Gojo.”

“Happy new year to you too, soon-to-be Mrs Gojo.”

Darling you’re my my my my

Loverrr <3

________________________________________

ever blushed while reading your own writing? I just did lmao. Hope y’all liked this!


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1 year ago

Back to December

Pairing- Geto Suguru x Fem!Reader

Summary- You broke up with him because you thought he deserved someone better than you. But here you stand, outside his door, apologising for that night, after realising you loved him too much to let him go. Based on Back to December (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift.

Warnings- angstttt but fluff at the end, hurt/comfort, no curses!au, swearing (maybe), slight ooc suguru (hes called clumsy hehe), probably my english lol.

Word count- 2.3k (excluding lyrics)

A/N- atp yall just know how much big of a swiftie I am lol. So here’s a new fic based on another taylor song haha. And from now on I will write for JJK fandom too coz i’m obsessed lmao. Let me know if you find any mistakes coz this isn’t proofread and hope y’all enjoy.

Back To December

Knock. Knock. Knock.

You knocked three times on the door of the house you knew all too well as you picked your nails.

Will he want to see you? Will he shout at you? Will he tell you to get lost? Whatever he does, you knew you deserved it.

You stood outside his door impatiently, nerves getting the best of you while you waited for him to open the door. You could hear things falling down from behind it.

You couldn’t help but chuckle. He was always the clumsy one. One of his things which you missed too much. Your eyes fell on thought of this. Oh how much you wished for a change in your mind back then.

You heard the lock of the door being undone and you started to freak out from inside. Was it a good idea to come here? Maybe. You were about to find out.

“Sorry for the delay. I was caught up-” You heard his voice quiet down when he saw you. God how much you missed his voice. You could listen to his voice every second of the day if possible.

You’ve been good, busier than ever

"Y/N," he breathed, his voice barely above a whisper as he took in your presence on his doorstep, as if he was making sure he wasn’t hallucinating.

The way he said your name, ached your heart. Because it wasn’t filled with love or warmth as before, instead it was more like recognising a stranger.

You took a deep breath before speaking, “long time no see, Suguru.” You smiled slightly.

He couldn’t believe it. He never thought he’d ever see you again after that unfaithful night. The wishes he made to see you every night before he went to bed actually came true. He could actually hear your voice after whole six months. He felt like he was about to cry.

Your guard is up and I know why

All he wanted to do at this moment was to take you in his arms and never let you go again. But he knew he couldn’t. What if you were here to make things even more awful than they already were? He couldn’t handle another heartbreak. So he stood his ground and decided to talk to you in a civil way.

“Come inside. It’ll start s-snowing soon.” He said, mentally cursing himself for stammering as he stepped aside to let you in.

“Thank you.” You muttered before entering his house. The familiar feeling came back to you. The aura and memories of his house, where you had spent countless nights together crashed into your mind like ocean waves. It was overwhelming and you did your best not to burst into tears.

“I’ll bring you something to drink. You can make yourself comfortable till then.” You heard him speak as he quickly walked into the kitchen.

Because the last time you saw me

Is still burned in the back of your mind

You knew he was doing his best to avoid a more than casual conversation with you. Because the last time you had talked, things turned bitter.

You gave me roses and I left them there to die

You still remembered that day like the back of your hand. He had showed up at your house with roses to surprise you and take you out on a surprise date. And you, being a stupid person, ruined it all.

“Here. I didn’t have anything else except for hot chocolate plus I know how much you love it.” He said handing you the cup filled with hot chocolate, his voice becoming a soft mutter at the last part.

‘He still remembers my likes and dislikes.’ You thought as you smiled softly at him and took the cup, your hands brushing a little. Your cheeks immediately turn red as you tried to hide them, while Suguru thanked the gods that his red cheeks won’t be obvious because it’s winter.

I’d go back to December, turn around and make it all right

But you knew him. You were slightly relieved you still had some effects on him like before. How much you regretted leaving him like that. If only you could go back time and make things right.

You took a sip of your hot chocolate before speaking, “thanks for the hot chocolate, Suguru.”

Geto thought he’d just die right now. The way you said his name, it made him want to forget everything that happened and just hold you into his arms, never letting you go again. But he knew he couldn’t do that.

After some long moments of silence, you decided to break it and said, “how have you been, Suguru?”

“I’ve been- good.” He said with a pause in between. He was lying, but he didn’t want you to know his mental state ever since you had left. “What about you?”

You couldn’t repeat his answer for this question, because you knew it was far from the truth. You couldn’t quite recall the last time you slept peacefully. Maybe it was when you were in Suguru’s arms, safe and loved.

Staying up playing back myself leaving

Your mind replayed memories of that unfaithful night, as if trying to torture you for what you had done. It had started to hurt physically. How much you just wanted apologise and hold him into your arms. But you knew you had lost that right. Why? Because of your stupid insecurities.

You had been in a few relationships in the past apart from Geto. And you were always called out for every little thing you did. Whether it was from the way you ate, or the way you talked, they’d make sure to remind you that you weren’t enough and weird, until they all left you alone. This lead you to believe the same, that you were the problem.

That was until you met Suguru. He was everything you could ask in a man. He was charming, a true gentleman, kind and caring boyfriend who never failed to remind you how much you mean to him.

And I think about Summer, all the beautiful times

You often daydreamed about all your memories from your relationship, from sneaking out at night to late night car drives, from celebrating each other’s birthdays to forgetting plans you’d made with your other friends. Your relationship with him was something you read in books about.

You still remembered the day when you realised that he was the guy you were going to marry someday. You had overheard him talking to Gojo about you. You hadn’t meant to eavesdrop but when he mentioned your name, your ears had perked up. And the way be kept on talking about how amazing you were and how much he loved you, you knew he was the one for you.

Then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept right into my mind

But of course you had to ruin it all. The ‘what if’ thoughts came back to you. The thought of losing him because you weren’t good enough for him, scared you. You had told him about your past relationships, and he always reminded you that you are more than enough for him and he loves you with all of his heart.

Fuck your stupid negativity. You tried to believe him, you really did. But your mind wouldn’t let you. So it lead you to the one thing which you knew you were going to regret for the rest of your life. You let him go. And you hated yourself for it.

You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

You still remembered the way his face had immediately fallen the moment you spoke those words. He had tried to reason with you, but you wouldn’t listen. And you had slammed the door shut on his face.

Geto didn’t stop bombarding your phone with countless texts and missed calls for days. But you didn’t reply to any of them. Until one day he stopped. Maybe he realised that he was just wasting time being after you. Maybe he realised that you were the problem after all.

It turns out freedom ain’t nothing but missing you

Wishing I’d realised what I had when you were mine

You thought you had did the right thing but turns out, you didn’t. You had only made things worse for both of you. Because you know what they say, you only realise the value of something when its gone. And it turns out that you had loved him too much. You couldn’t let him go. Because you had realised that he was too precious for you to let go and you couldn’t survive without him.

So here you were, six months later, on his couch, drinking hot chocolate. You slowly came out of your thoughts and said the only thing which came into your mind, “I’m sorry.”

To say Geto was surprised was an understanding. He expected anything but an apology from you tonight. Blame him for being conscious and hurt. He didn’t say anything, giving the cue to continue.

“I’m so sorry, Suguru.” You started, trying your best not to sob, “I know this is probably the last thing you expect from me and won’t believe me but I mean it. I’m really sorry. I’m such a fucked up person, who always makes things worse, ruins perfectly going on lives of people, who always lives in self-doubts.”

“Y/N, I-”, Geto started to say something but you cut him off before he could say it.

“Please let me finish.” Geto nodded in response.

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me so right

And how you held me in your arms that September night, the first time you ever saw me cry

“I miss everything about you, about us. I miss how every morning you didn’t fail to wish me ‘good morning’, I miss how you never forgot to check up on me, I miss how you always found a way to make me feel special. I miss how you always held me close to you whenever I didn’t feel like myself. And most of all, I miss the way you used to love me.” You said, tears now falling uncontrollably from your eyes but you don’t care, determined to make things right.

I’d go back in time and change it but I can’t

So you continued, “thing is that I love you, Suguru Geto. And I love you too much to let you go. I made a stupid move by letting you go when all I wanted to do was hold you into my arms. And I hate myself for it. These past six months, I’ve been terrible. There’s not been a single day where I have not wished for myself to be somehow able to go back in time and make things right, stop myself from leaving. But I know I can’t.” You took a deep breath.

So if the chain is on your door I understand

“I know my actions are not something to be easily forgiven, but I promise to do anything to win your trust and love back. I’m willing to change. I’m willing to make things up with you. I swear that if you take me back again, I will love you right and never let you go. Because I have realised my life is nothing if you’re not in it. Please take me back, Suguru. I promise to prove myself worthy of your love.” You couldn’t speak anything after this, sobs continuously escaping your mouth.

Geto stood there, tears in his eyes as well, contemplating what to say. Your apology had caught him off guard, but he knew you had meant every word. He knew that his life was incomplete without you too.

But this is me swallowing my pride

You didn’t hear him speak for a good few minutes, so you take his silence as rejection. Of course he would reject you. You had hurt him, why would he want to get back with someone like you. You let out a shaky breath as a sigh, disappointment for you escaping through it as you stood up.

Standing in front of you saying I’m sorry for that night

You attempted to smile through your tears. If this was going to be the last time you see him, might as well say goodbye with a smile.

“I got your answer, Suguru. Thank you for giving me best moments of my life. Maybe I didn’t get to have you back, but at least I can live on with your memories. Maybe I-” You didn’t get to finish your sentence as you felt a pair of all too familiar lips on yours, shutting you up.

It turns our freedom ain’t nothing but missing you

You widened your eyes from surprise but immediately shut them as you kissed back, your hands reaching to hug his neck, bringing him closer to you. Suguru wrapped his one arm around your waist and other made its way in your nape, holding you just like he always used to.

Both of you could taste salty tears as you kissed, but weren’t sure who’s they were. All that mattered in that moment was the two of you. You poured all of your love, apprehensions, bottled up feelings for him, regrets into this kiss. He kissed you with same passion. As if your lips were the only thing he needed to survive.

Few moments later, Geto pulled away, foreheads still attached to yours, as he looked into your eyes. “Y/N, in these six months, you made me realise that the only thing which can complete me whole is you. Not getting to tell you these was tearing me apart. I thought I had lost you for good, but then you showed up at my door and all those feelings I had for you doubled. I love all of you, Y/N and I always will. And I’m willing to give us another chance, just promise me that you will talk to me next time you have those negative thoughts.”

Your heart melted hearing his words as you nodded, “I promise.”

Suguru ran his hand through your hair as he spoke again, “and I-I’ll need some time to completely forgive you. I hope you understand that. I’m just scared that you’ll leave me again.”

You quickly shook your head, “I mean it this time, Suguru. I’d never even dream of leaving you. I just got you back. And it’s okay. Take your time. I’m willing to wait for you, even if it is for an eternity.”

Suguru smiled at your words and pulled you into his chest as he swayed you slowly, holding you tightly close to him, and you finally felt complete again. You kissed his neck as you returned his gesture, silently promising him and yourself to never give up on him and let him go ever again.

I’d go back to December all the time

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Ahhh I loved writing angst sm but it always breaks my heart if it doesn’t end with fluff. Anyways hope y’all liked this and if you want, you can send in request for JJK characters too!

(I might’ve gotten a little carried away at the end but i think it was worth it lmao)


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2 years ago

thank you for 1k <3

Who he really loves

Pairing: Harry Potter x Fem!Reader Summary - Who knew that one star-gazing night and a simple question could change everything?

Warnings: Super ‘fluffy’ (iykyk), very very little angst in between and as always my poor English :)

Word count - 1.3k

A/N: I've had this idea for a while so decided why not post it. So here it is. Hope y’all enjoy <3

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Who He Really Loves

The cold prickly grass was nipping at your arms and legs through your clothes as you laid down near the Black Lake, and warmth radiating from your side where Harry Potter laid. The light from the stars and moon was the only source of light. The dim lanterns of Hogwarts seemed like fairy lights.

It wasn't uncommon for you and your best friend Harry to sneak out of the castle at late nights, or in this case very early in the morning. At this time, it was 1.45 am. For the most part it would be a comfortable silence, you both star gazing, deep in thoughts, or small talks about random things.

You had always loved space and everything about stars because everything about them fascinated you. So while you two lay in the grass, you often looked at the constellations or wondered about moon and it never tired you.

"Um, Y/N?" Harry called breaking the silence. You hummed in response not taking your eyes off the night sky.

"I need your opinion on something. Something important." His voice wavered a little, so this had to be important if he was so nervous about it.

"Oh okay, go on," you said and waited for him to continue.

"So, um, well, I-I think I'm in- in love with two different people," he said not looking at you but the moon and placing his one arm behind his head like a pillow, "and I don't know who should I go after."

"Well," you paused not really knowing what to say as no one ever has asked you such type of question.

"Well, tell me about the first girl. What do you think of her, how you feel for her." You said quietly finally getting a head start.

"Well, I've know her since our first year but didn't really start talking to her until our last. She is really pretty and I do like her, and I want to protect her but I think these feelings that I have kind of shrunk, when I realized I liked the second one. I know I still I like her but not just as much as I used to," he finished slightly glancing towards you. You were thinking.

"If you don't like her as much as you used to do, why are you still hanging on?" you asked glancing at him as well.

The moonlight made your skin glow and your eyes got a nice twinkle to them, and that one glance made Harry's heart flutter.

"Because I think she is the only one I really have a chance with and can have a two-sided relationship." He turned his gaze back to the sky.

You thought even more. There were so many girls out there who would date him in a heartbeat. And okay, you included. Because even though you've tried to deny it, you had fallen for him. And you'd fallen hard. Very hard.

You were best friends for years and it just happened. Maybe because it was the way he looked, the way he smiled, the way he laughed, the way his hair would always be messy, you just couldn't help it.

But this isn't about you, it's about Harry.

"Okay, now tell me about the second one." You said slowly coming out if your thoughts.

His face turned pink, "I realized it only a couple of months ago, but I thought it was just a crush but I don't know when this crush became more. I'm friends with her, and the more I am with her I only fall for her more. But I don't know if she feels the same." He said his voice getting smaller and smaller.

"So you knew you liked-loved the first one, correct? But then you fell for the second one?" you glanced at him.

"Yeah." He said simply.

"Well, who do you think you should go for?" you ask looking back at the sky.

"Um, I think I should go for the first one, as I loved her first right? And I have more chances with her." He said with the same quiet voice. "But who do you think I should go after?" he asked his hands getting sweaty as he waited for your answer.

You thought for some more time and finally came to a conclusion.

"I think you should go for the... second girl." You said. Harry's heart bounced hearing you.

"Why do you think that?" he asked a little more quietly looking at you with pink face.

"Because you said you still loved the first one when you realized your feeling for second, right? So if you truly loved the first one, then why would you fall for second one?"

The only sounds that could be heard now were of the crickets, some owls, rustling of winds in the trees and water from the lake.

Harry laid there quietly, taking in every word you said. It all made sense now.

Why he would mostly be awkward with you, why he would mostly get nervous when you're around, why you were the only one who could make him smile even in his dark moments, why he would seek only your cuddles and sweet words whenever he would have a bad day.

Thoughts went through his head and then he realized. He was truly and unconditionally, deeply and undeniably, in love with you. He was in love with your smile, your laugh, your silly jokes, your personality. He was in love with everything about you.

He just thought he loved Ginny but it was you all along.

"Why did you ask me this, anyways?" you asked bringing him out of his thoughts.

"The first girl asked me out on a date and I wanted to know who I really wanted to be with before I said yes." He admitted. You felt something inside you by thinking of him being someone else.

"And have you made up your mind?" you asked looking at him.

He had a soft look in his eyes and even though the night was chilly on the December night, they still gave a warm look.

"Yeah, I'm going with girl two." He said casually.

"Really?" you asked with a teasing voice.

"Yeah, I'm gonna tell Ginny how I feel about her tomorrow." He said as he let out a deep breath.

Your heart sunk deep in your stomach when you heard him. Some tears came but you blinked them back. Was Ginny the girl he loved?

"You- your in l-love with G-Ginny?" you asked trying to sound as casual as possible.

"No, she was girl one. She asked me out earlier today and I'll tell her tomorrow what I feel about her." He replied.

You were somewhat relieved hearing this but still worried who this second girl might be. He can love whoever he wants and it couldn't be possibly you right? You didn't stand a chance. But maybe you could help him get with her if you knew who she was. Then he would be happy. And that was all you wanted.

"So who's the second?" you asked your heart beating faster than ever.

Harry softly smiled to himself and looked at you. The smile never left his face. His green eyes glistening behind his round glasses from moonlight and his messy hair all over his forehead, you couldn't help but stare with pink cheeks.

"You."


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