I JUST WANNA WRITE

I JUST WANNA WRITE

I have a hidden identity

No one knew

but this was a wish of mine,

wish of being a writer

For a long time now...

I wanted to deliver messages,

messages that make one smile

And am smiling telling this to you:

'I am not in search for perfect lines

I just wanna write and keep going '.

It's okay it's not good today

But I wanna write better tomorrow.

There's always a message

I am sending through these works

And hope you keep smiling.

This was the first poem I published back then to introduce myself and tell for why I am writing.

Insecurities & Imperfection:

Truth is I'm too imperfect

it includes both from within and without.

May not be beautiful for everyone's sight

but, whoever sees

what's inside, will surely adore it

even if from far.

Truth is I'm insecure of many things

don't just choose to show

in fear of being bullied when they know.

I keep me so private

even from the one whom

I am closest to.

I don't want to die of that same pain again,

don't want to fall in the same pit twice.

They once pushed me.

They are not humans I say.

They are more of monsters!

that makes you feel so insecure

and down.

They speak things so mean.

Brown and blacks are not liked

for when it's skin tone,

but I don't understand

they still carry

red blood.

Then where's the difference?

aren't we all the same inside?

Laughed at, for acne marks

no matter

friend, relative, or a complete stranger.

All they care about is breaking hearts

and making me feel not good enough.

These monsters have a common goal,

they all just want to look down at me

and make me feel crushed.

Maybe all they want is to feel superior?

for their own insecurities.

Could they not just make fun?

or not give that look as if I am the monster?

AQUA BEACH

I love the breeze, Love walking on the beach.

Making castles of wet sand . Leaves fluttering like my heart ❤ Watching the glittery waves.

Hearing the birds chirp and fly in the violet blue red sky .

Tribe putting up the fire 🔥 by the side,

I walk by Thinking to join them .

Can smell the salty water and steak .

Found a shell under my toe So, Grey and yellow.

Looking at the sunset. I knew it was the best thing 😌 That evening.

Staying friends

Nothing really matters

now that I have learned

not to be ever an option

of anybody.

After so long I liked a guy.

A wrong guy

and I know it in my senses,

knowing we don't hold a future

but what do I do?

He makes me smile, blush,

my heart flutter like no one ever did

I like the way he puts his words

together.

Though he says,

he wants to give this a try.

I know he is a fuckboy,

so, I don't want to.

I know I will be wounded further more.

So holding on as friends

which I will let go off soon

because for him it's just my body

Saying 'NO' to dates

'NO' a response to start something new.

Fear of past repeating

or my wounds worsening

How do I tell him?

This is the best was we can live.