Brocessed

Brocessed

It was supposed to be a regular Friday night, just us nerds crowded around the table, rolling dice and fighting imaginary dragons. Our group had been together for years—me, Scott, Joey, Derek, and our Dungeon Master, Eric. We had snacks, character sheets, and an epic campaign planned for the night. Nothing out of the ordinary, right?

Except when that knock came at the door.

“Who could that be?” I muttered, looking at the clock. None of us had ordered pizza, and it was almost 11 p.m. We all exchanged looks, and Eric, the tallest of us and thus unofficial “leader” of the group, got up to answer it.

Before he could even turn the knob, the door exploded open, and six guys stormed in. They were huge—like, NFL linebacker huge. All wearing golden jerseys with a crest I didn’t recognize, but I swear I’d seen before. They had an intimidating presence, like warriors marching into battle.

“Who—who are you?” Eric stammered, backing up as the tallest of them—a guy built like a truck—stepped inside.

“We’re the Golden Army,” the guy growled. “And you’re all about to be brocessed”

“What the hell?” Derek muttered, his glasses slipping down his nose as he looked for somewhere to hide. Joey was frozen in place, clutching his character sheet like it was a life preserver. Scott had already backed up against the wall, hands raised in surrender. And me? I couldn’t move. My heart pounded as if I’d rolled a nat-1 on a saving throw.

“Get the gear,” the leader of the Golden Army barked. One of the guys—a muscular dude with short black hair—opened a duffel bag and tossed something onto the table. Golden jerseys.

“What... what are you doing?” Scott’s voice cracked as the jerseys landed in front of us. They shimmered in the light, catching my eye with an almost hypnotic glow.

“You’re gonna suit up,” another one of them said, smirking. “Or we’ll make you.”

I felt a strange urge as I reached for the jersey in front of me. My mind screamed no, but my body acted on autopilot. I slipped off my button down and pulled the golden jersey over my head. The moment it touched my skin, I felt a jolt—like electricity coursing through my veins.

The room began to spin. My body... it didn’t feel like mine anymore. The tight fabric hugged my chest, arms, and stomach, and I realized I was growing. My muscles were expanding, filling out the jersey as if I had spent years in the gym. My scrawny arms were now thick and solid, and my legs... they bulged with muscle. I could feel power surging through me.

“What the... what’s happening?” I gasped, looking down at my arms in disbelief. My voice sounded deeper, more authoritative.

“You’re part of the Golden Army now,” the leader smirked, his eyes gleaming with satisfaction. “We’re training for the championship.”

“Championship? What... sport?” Eric asked, his voice thick with confusion.

The leader smirked. “Football.”

I blinked. Football? I hadn’t played since high school, and even then, I was a benchwarmer for the JV team. I never even made it onto the field. But now, standing in this new body, it felt... right. Like I could take on anyone. Like I was born to play.

“I... I don’t know anything about football,” Joey muttered, but even as he said it, I could tell his hands itched to throw a pass. My body was already anticipating the rush of the game. My mind was trying to resist, but it was like the jersey was seeping into my thoughts. Changing me.

“You will,” the leader said, tossing us a football. “Golden Army doesn’t lose. The brocess make sure of that.”

The transformation wasn’t just physical. It was mental, too. As my body transformed, so did my mind. At first, it was subtle—just a heightened awareness of my surroundings, a sharper focus. But then, new thoughts and feelings began to flood in. I started thinking about football in ways I never had before. Plays, tactics, strategies—things I barely understood a few minutes ago suddenly made perfect sense.

The old me was fading away, and in his place, a new Ryan was emerging. This new version of me *knew* how to play football. I could picture myself on the field, reading defenses, making quick decisions, anticipating the moves of the other team. It felt as natural as breathing, like I had been doing it my whole life. The Golden Army had imprinted these skills and knowledge into my brain, reshaping my very identity.

I glanced around the room, watching as the same thing happened to my friends. Scott’s face, once sharp and angular, was now broader, his jawline square and strong. His glasses had been discarded, replaced by eyes that gleamed with a newfound confidence. He flexed his arms, grinning, clearly enjoying his new muscular form. His mind had changed too—I could see it in the way he held the football, like he already knew he was the leader on the field, our quarterback.

Joey, who had always been shy and soft-spoken, was now looking at his reflection in the window, grinning at the sight of his bulked-up body. His usual slouch was gone, replaced by a straight-backed stance that radiated self-assurance. His fingers twitched as if he was itching to catch a pass or make a play. He looked over at us and smirked, as if he had always been a part of this, always belonged here.

Derek, the smallest of us, was perhaps the most drastic transformation. He had gone from being the least athletic among us to one of the most intimidating. His shoulders had broadened, his neck thickened, and his arms were massive now, bulging with muscle that strained against the golden jersey. His usual timid expression was gone, replaced by a fierce determination. I could tell that the mental shift had been even stronger for him. The Derek I knew was quiet, bookish—but now, there was fire in his eyes. He looked ready to bulldoze through anyone in his way.

Even Eric, our Dungeon Master, was no longer the same. The intellectual intensity he’d always carried was still there, but it was tempered with an aggressive edge. His muscles were as big as the rest of ours, and I could see the gears turning in his head, already calculating plays and strategies for our new team.

And me... well, I was fully immersed in this new identity now. The Golden Army had done more than just change my body; they had rewired my brain. My old memories—of late nights rolling dice, debating over character stats—felt distant, like a dream fading in the morning light. In their place were new memories, new desires. The thrill of competition, the rush of adrenaline on the field, the camaraderie of my team—it all felt real, immediate, and, more importantly, right.

I could feel the old Ryan—the one who would rather hide behind a character sheet than step onto a field—slipping away. In his place was a new version of me. Someone who thrived on strength, speed, and competition. Someone who wanted to win, not just in a game of fantasy but in real life. The football field wasn’t just a new battlefield; it was where I belonged.

“Ready to crush it, man?” Scott asked, tossing the football to me.

I caught it effortlessly, my reflexes sharp, my hands steady. The old Ryan would’ve fumbled it, too shocked by everything that had just happened. But the new me? I was ready. I grinned, feeling a surge of confidence I had never known before.

“Yeah,” I said, my voice deeper and more assured. “Let’s go win this thing.”

We weren’t just a bunch of nerds anymore. We were the Golden Army. And there were more nerds waiting to be brocessed.

So who converted you? Are you particularly interested in soccer? what all thisaboutbeing a linebacker too

It was partly myself at first when I was first interested though because absolutely sure on doing it after talking to my twinbrah @scott-golden9. I am actually more interested in soccer now after joining than I was before all of this. As for also being a linebacker, most of us do other sports besides soccer with football being my main non soccer sport since I was a football jock before joining.

My bros @scott-golden9 and @golden-logan10 wanted to pose with all the different variations of the golden knight mascot. We have different costumes for different sports, but Grayden is the lead mascot for a reason. I've got the stamina to wear any of these costumes for hours.

Wait how come Scott and Logan got stand-ins and I had to stand in all these sweaty costumes for hours for the photoshoot? You bros better be ready for a musky Grayden after all these hours of promo photos.

Like the costume, join the team to see it up close bro.💛

Xander here brahs! Tryin out for the lacrosse team! Mah bros tell me Imma shoo in! What do you think guys? I think I look hawt. Shoutout to @dylangold20 for the pics! Fucking awesome bro!

Road-Trip: Hawaii

The bros have reached their first destination on the road-trip: The sunny beaches of Hawaii! There are so many things to see and do here, but the bros are most excited about the sports.

Aside from the usual soccer on the beach, we’re also looking at beach volleyball for our sports arsenal. The golden swimsuits are looking good, and we’ve already had several people come up and beg to join! We’re always looking for new bros, and our new beach volleyball team is sure to dominate next season.

That was a fun stop for the road-trip, and there are so many more places to visit and sports to try out.

Where should we head next? What sports should we try out there? Let me know!

Here are some of our Golden Team Boxers, modelling for the team photos, and it is another sport we do as part of The Golden Army, all of these boxers are Alphas and always win their matches as their opponents underestimate them.

@toxicafaesthetic

@brodygold

@romangolden68

Come and join us bros or we have other openings like mascot, waterboy etc..so if you want join hmu brahs