The New Angle Maximizing Mirror Chris Got For His Birthday To Was By Far The Dopest Gift Brad Ever Bought

The new “Angle Maximizing Mirror” Chris got for his birthday to was by far the dopest gift Brad ever bought him.

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Chris couldn’t tell so he snapped a selfie.

Brad replied, “Well. That’s the right arm right? So you must be driving. You look like a woodchuck Chris.”

Chris: “Yeah you like that?”

Brad: “How much wood, would a woodchuck chuck?”

Chris: “A lot of wood.”

Brad: “Like how much wood?”

Brad: “How much wood Chris?”

Brad: “Wood.”

(Two minutes of garble from Chris’ phone)

Brad: “Chris?”

Jim on Chris’ Phone: “Hi Brad? This is Jim. I’m a medic at Ceaders. Chris has been in an accident.”

Brad: “Was he driving?”

Jim on Chris’ Phone: “Chris was in the passenger seat. No one was behind the wheel. We’re trying to figure that out.

Brad: “Us too. Hey can you put Chris on the phone? I need to finish off this wood business.”

Brad’s tummy kept making noise. Maybe it was trying to do the laundry. Chris hoped so. His mind was dirty. Sex obviously got in the way of any further intelligible conversation.

Brad was pissed. His sleeves weren't "missing." He never saw a sleeve pictured on milk carton in his life. That woman was rediculous. Why wouldn’t she just go away? She couldn’t see a cute t-shirt if it hit her over the head. Now where was Chris with that crop top? Brad needed to cool off.

Chris was 76% sure he put his singlet on correctly. No matter. It shan't be on long.

Zach Riley sure looks ready to wrestle. Question is, is he? 

With Brad asleep, Chris thought to wonder down the Appalachian Trail.