Semblance Of Self

Semblance of Self

Arkham!Riddler x GN!Reader, word count: 1k commission: urgh ok thank you @necromances-chances for this soft prompt with eddie!! please also note that in my mind, there was 5 months of constant arguing to get him to the point where he considered dressing up nicely lmao commission me here! request info • prompt list • send me a request • kofi • masterlist minors DNI!! 🔞 cw: stubborn eddie, some angst with eddie's inner turmoil, soft fluff

When you found the source of the noise, and along with it, Eddie, you put on the sternest voice you could muster and flicked on the light switch.

“Shower. Now.”

This morning you had reminded Eddie that he had an event that he had promised to go to. When you placed his lunch down in front of him at his workbench you had reminded him again. And an hour ago, you had told him that he had to stop what he was doing and go take a shower. But when you had walked past the bathroom, there was no sound of rushing water, and the lights were out. And it wasn’t that he had forgotten, because after traipsing around the sewers on the hunt for him, you found him crouched amongst some of his old robotic prototypes, idly tinkering with them. 

“I’m a tad busy.”

“With old parts and machines that weren’t up to your standard? Sounds completely believable.”

You placed a hand on his shoulder, showing your support. It wasn’t easy for him to live as though things were normal. In solitary confinement down here he could be exactly who he was without worrying about social conventions, small talk, and the odd rules he couldn’t quite follow with regards to being polite and modest and human. 

“Come on, I’ll give you a hand.”

“I don’t think we have time for that.”

It was impossible not to smile, or to blush, at the nonchalant comment, but he was right. You couldn’t indulge yourself. He had to get ready, there was no getting out of it. He couldn’t charm his way out of it by charming his way into you.

He stood with a sour face the entire time you tugged at his clothing in the cold air of the bathroom. Not once did he make an effort to lessen the burden. Instead, his awkward, dead limbed stance made everything harder. And he pouted, sighing and grumbling under his breath when you informed him that you wouldn’t be leaving the bathroom until he was finished. Muttering his complaints under his breath, he washed while you stood cross-armed waiting on him. 

When he was finally finished, you marched him to the bedroom where he stood awkwardly, wrapped in a towel and dripping onto the concrete floor. 

“Come sit on the edge of the bed, please. Since you refuse to wear gel, I’m going to brush your hair while it’s wet, that way it might settle nicely.”

Edward did as he was told, but that didn’t at all mean that he was pleased about it.

“I’m not a child. And I am certainly intelligent and capable enough to dress myself.”

“And yet, you couldn’t get showered and ready on time?”

“That has nothing to do with my abilities, and far more to do with my unwillingness to attend this ridiculous party.”

Tutting, you tried to focus on combing his hair, brushing the dark, brown strands into a neater style than you were used to seeing on him.

“It’s not as though it’s some wild party with karaoke and cheap alcohol. It’s Harvey’s birthday. You have to show. It’s in the sort of… ridiculous rogue code, no? You have to pretend to get along. Or something.”

Eddie’s reply was curt, to his usual standard.

“Or something.” 

Sitting down next to him, you placed your hand on his. Sometimes, a simple gesture was all it took for him to open up or to better express himself. You hoped it would prevent an all-out huff if you could get him to talk.

“What is it that’s bothering you about tonight, Eddie?”

“Everything.”

“Because it’s out of your comfort zone? Because you have to speak to people? Because you have to wear that suit I bought you?”

You glanced over to the wall where the suit was hanging by a hanger and a rusted nail. In your peripheral, you could see Eddie was staring at it too. 

“It’s a boring suit.”

“It’ll look very good on you.”

With a sigh, Edward stood up from the bed and began to pace, as he was wont to do when he found himself overwhelmed or emotionally spent. He picked up the white shirt on one of his loops and began to button it up as he walked, clearly trying to keep to the schedule you had set. Even in his determination to express to you how deeply he did not want to go, he was bound by his odd habit of being punctual. 

“Regardless of how it might look when draped over my body, it is not emblematic of the Riddler. Hardly. This isn’t me. That is what I have a problem with. I am stripped of the essence of self. There’s nothing recognisable, nothing truly Edward Nygma about this facade that you-”

His mouth stayed open, lips parted in surprise as he stared at the items in your hands. 

“It’s not you as you are right now. But how many changes have you gone through? How much of you is kept in your appearance, and how much more is in your actions and your words? I know it’s difficult to lose the items that make you feel secure, but hopefully…”

You looped the dark, forest green tie around his neck, letting the ends hang over his shoulders against his chest. The tiny silver cufflinks, which you had custom-made, you fastened onto his sleeves, watching his smile stretch out as he admired the shape of them. Subtle, but still question marks. Still something identifiable. Something that made him feel like himself. 

“I can assure you, Edward Nygma, that the moment you begin monologuing about their various inadequacies, they’ll know it’s you.”

He smiled towards you, ignoring the obvious but playfully intended insult, knowing it was hard to argue with the reasoning. 

“Do you think so?”

“Of course. You’re a very difficult man to forget or ignore. No matter how hard someone might try.”

His lips curled up at the edges, a mischievous grin you were very familiar with. He might not be happy about attending the party, but in true Riddler fashion, he would make sure the party was just as unhappy about that.

I am brought so much joy and delight by every scene in this show like this where he just goes nuts I love it all so much

First thing you see after you zoom in is how you die

How you dying 👀

We should be fine as long as we do not reblog bread.

The band, the music, the dance.

puts on sound 📣🎶🎵