One Day - Adam Stanheight / Reader

One Day - Adam Stanheight / Reader

A/N I heard the song Gonna Love Ya - by Avicii on the radio and I thought of a story immediately. I know it’s an old song, idk what it was doing on the radio. Also this story is long!!

Winter was harsh this year. The snow was piling up outside the door, the wind was shaking the windows, and the thunder roared overhead violently. Your lights flashed and flickered every once in a while and the chill outside was seeping through your thin walls. You shivered, and clutched your blanket closer. Your hot chocolate was still sitting on the counter, where you had forgotten it a long time ago. It was probably cold by now.

Adam Stanheight was your roommate. He had left to get groceries about an hour and a half ago when the sky was still clear. You’d insisted on going with him, but he was determined to go by himself. You understood his need for alone time. He usually did the grocery shopping by himself.

But something was wrong. It never took him so long to get the groceries before. You were concerned. Shaking your head, you muttered something about being more firm with him.

Adam walked through the door at that exact moment. His arms were full of grocery bags, but that was the least of your concerns. Adam’s face was white, and his eyes were red. He was shaking from the cold as he dropped everything onto the counter, and slumped back against it.

You folded your lips nervously, as your heart started pounding a little. Leaning against the counter like that, giving you a side view, made Adam look so much more attractive than he already was. He huffed out in fatigue, and closed his eyes.

You had always had feelings for Adam, but you didn’t do anything about them. Mostly, you were too shy to make a move, but… you were also scared of ruining the good relationship you had with him right now. Hesitantly, you stood up and went to him. “Adam…” you whispered.

After the severe events of Jigsaw, you could understand his emotional issues, but it hurt every time you saw it happening. But Adam was recovering well from that due to the therapy and some extra precautions. You could guess that this was something else.

“Adam, what’s wrong?”

Adam didn’t look at you. Now that you were closer, you could smell the strong scent of smoke. He’d been smoking. That meant his life was really shitty right now.

“Would you like to talk about it?” You asked.

“What’s wrong with me?” He wondered miserably. “I thought the therapy would help?”

You looked at him up and down, stunned a little. “It is. It IS helping. You’re being helped.”

Adam looked into your eyes. “Then why do I feel like this? I’m not like you.”

His words hit you, and you frowned. “That doesn’t matter. If everyone was the same, life would be boring.”

“No,” Adam added instantly. “I’m not… normal… I’m not happy anymore. I was different before Kramer took me for his twisted game.”

You felt your heart break. Hastily, you replied, “You ARE normal. You’re just lost… Your therapist and I are trying to help redirect you.”

“ ‘Redirect’ me? You make it sound like a good thing.”

“That’s because it is a good thing. It’s okay to feel like this. You are okay.”

“No,” Adam insisted, glaring at the floor.

“Yes,” you assured Adam firmly. You grabbed his hands in yours.

“No.” Adam tried to get past you, but you blocked his way. “Why do you care?”

“Because…” Your mouth was dry, and your throat was tight. It surprised you how quickly the words, ‘I love you’ wanted to escape your lips. But… you weren’t even dating. That would be weird. “I care about you a lot…” you said vaguely.

Adam cast you a dubious look, and let out a scornful snort. “Yeah. Yeah, like I believe that.”

“It’s true,” you grumbled under your breath. Adam didn’t hear you, which was the point.

But this wasn’t about Jigsaw’s game, and you knew it. Adam was dealing with a difficult breakup at the moment. He had been with another woman, she hadn’t been one of the nicest people. She always tried to take advantage of Adam’s trauma instead of trying to help it. She’d lied to him all the time. She cheated on him.

That woman had never loved Adam and it had been painstakingly obvious to you, and to everyone else around you. Just not to Adam. She didn’t love him, not like you did.

“That’s not what’s bothering you,” you told him.

“How do you know?” Adam asked bitterly.

Because I study everything you do? Wait, that’s creepy! Not what I meant!

But it was partly true. Due to your little crush on Adam Stanheight, you had become very observant of him; you noticed things about him, and spotted patterns in his behavior. Not to mention, you’d been living with him for about two years now - things were bound to start calling out to you.

“Because,” you said quietly, unsteadily. “I know you.”

Adam sighed heavily, but didn’t answer your question.

“Is it about HER?” You pressed.

“Yeah,” Adam responded eventually.

“Want to talk about it? Have you talked about it with your therapist?”

“No,” Adam answered blatantly. “I mean, no, I haven’t talked about it with my therapist. But yes, I would like to talk about it.”

“Well, go on. You know I’m here for you, right?”

Adam looked out the window sadly. “I just thought… we had something…” he stammered halfheartedly. “I thought she was who I thought she was. And you know… I feel like I deserve what she did to me.”

“You don’t deserve that!” You exclaimed defensively. “Nobody deserves that. You of all people! There’s no need to be so harsh on yourself.”

“Then why did she leave me?” Adam shot at you. “It must have been my fault she’s gone. Probably my trauma scared her away. I fucking hate that about myself.”

You stared at him helplessly. You didn’t like hearing Adam talk about himself that way, but there wasn’t anything else you could think of to say. “That’s not true,” you mustered. “She was using you. She didn’t sleep with you because she didn’t love you, not because she was disgusted by you. There’s a difference, you know. But there ARE people who care about you. Many people care about you. You just have to look around.”

“Who?” Adam asked bluntly. “And saying my therapist doesn’t count. My therapist is SUPPOSED to care about me.”

“And do they?” You questioned.

“Yeah. I guess,” Adam said begrudgingly.

You gazed at Adam, your cheeks hot and your mind numb. Standing so close to Adam was definitely not good for your mental state, but… you were holding his hands… That was pretty big!

“Well, let’s see. Your friends care about you. Your doctors care about you… You know, the barista at Starbucks cares about you because you guys are like friends now.”

Adam stared at you miserably. “Is that all?”

“Of course it’s not all. I’m sure your family cares about you.”

Adam didn’t seem satisfied with those answers. He raised an eyebrow. “What about you?”

You felt very self-conscious, but didn’t look away from Adam’s curious gaze. You didn’t know what to say to that. “I care about you,” you said slowly. “Of course I do, because you're my roommate. You’re my best friend.”

“Hmm,” Adam grunted. “Is that it?”

“I-I don’t know… I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”

“You don’t want to talk about what you think of me? That must mean you don’t like me.”

“No,” you growled. “That’s not what it means. I just care about you, I don't have a reason.”

And Adam seemed to fill in the blanks. “Oh…” he mumbled. “Does this make things awkward between us?”

“If you think it does,” you said offhandedly.

It was dead silent in the room, and you stalked back over to the couch, and flipped on the TV. After some scrolling through the crappy shows and movies, you turned it off again. Adam was still standing by the counter, a distant look in his eyes. His face was still white, but at least his eyes looked normal now; not so much like he’d be crying.

You picked up your phone and turned on the pop radio. You didn’t know what it had in store. The first thing on the list was a song you didn’t recognize, but the heavy beat and the loud synthesizer were both very appealing.

Adam looked at you when he heard the music. “What’s this?”

“I dunno.”

He came to sit next to you, as the lyrics started, and you bit your lower lip nervously. This was the song that had to play, wasn’t it? This one. Among every song in the universe, this one was the coincidental song that decided to play? You listened to it anyway, letting the meaning resonate within you. It felt good. A little bit, anyway.

“I’m gonna love ya…”

You put your head in your hand, and looked the other way. Oh this is a love song…

“I know I could. I’m gonna love ya, like no one could.”

This song isn’t even that great… No… It’s alright… I suppose.

You were self-conscious of yourself suddenly. This wasn’t what you had been expecting. While the song wasn’t TERRIBLE it wasn’t AMAZING either, but what got you really feeling nervous was how much you related.

“Make your heart feel the way it should. I’m gonna hold ya, when no one would.”

Adam’s physical presence was making you uncomfortable. You could now feel him pressing against you. It was only lightly, but you’d been the one to start the cuddling thing between you both. You could remember that fateful day.

“ ‘Cause I swear you deserve so good.” That was the breaking point. You felt those words within you greatly, and you wished you didn’t. But Adam was wholesome, and didn’t deserve the things he’d been put through. You wanted the best for him entirely. You muttered aloud unintentionally, “Shit.”

Adam glanced over immediately. “What’s the matter?”

You didn’t answer though. The song was coming to a close, and you still felt very unsatisfied.

“I’m gonna love ya, I know I could. I’m gonna love ya, like he never could. ‘Cause I know you deserve so good.”

“Oh, shit…” You breathed, your mind feeling slightly overwhelmed with emotions and thoughts all colliding into each other all at once. It made it hard to concentrate.

It was like this song was MADE for this situation. It made you think of your relationship with Adam all the way. You did love Adam… or at least your feelings for him were strong enough to be love. And you believed that you were good for Adam, you hoped to be, you wanted to be; and you were certain you could love him much better than his ex did. And you also believed that he deserved a better life than he was living. He was worth so much more than this.

“What?” Adam asked, a smile on his face. “Are you okay? Are you going to tell me what’s up?”

You reached for your phone and stopped the music. That was enough. Your mind was fried now. “Y-Yeah. I think so. Why don’t we go to bed? We can do something fun tomorrow. I’m really sorry you had a difficult day.”

Adam nodded gloomily. “Yeah. I guess. But, you never answered my question-”

You shrugged him off of you. “-I am really tired. Sheesh.”

“You know we should put the groceries away, right?” Adam reminded you from behind.

You turned to look at the counter, and stared. “Uh… Oh yeah… Do you want me to help you with them?”

Adam sighed. “You want to go to bed, don’t you?”

“Do you want my help? I’ll help.”

Adam thought for a moment, then said, “No. It’s okay. You’re really tired, you should go to sleep. I don’t mind. It’s only one bag anyway.”

“Oh…” You wandered off to your bedroom, and closed the door behind you.

In a few quick sweeps and swooshes, you had a pair of your most comfortable pajamas on your body. You leaned back into the bed, feeling your heart beating heavily in your chest. It was slowly starting to calm down, but you still felt a little agitated from the earlier situation. You had leaned on your pillows and were getting ready to fall asleep, when Adam peeked inside. He appeared quiet and uncertain, with a look of worry on his face.

“Am I interrupting?” He inquired calmly.

You looked at him. “No. What’s up?”

He came to sit on the edge of the bed. “You never answered my question… I’m concerned about you, you know. You’ve seemed a little off lately.”

You listened thoughtfully, then said, “No. I’m okay. I don’t want to talk about it.”

“So, you’re allowed to pry into my life, but I’m not allowed to pry into yours?”

I never forced you to open up. You did that. I would have left it alone, if you said ‘no’. But you didn’t.”

“Well, talk to me anyway. I’m not the only one who needs support sometimes.”

You considered his words for a minute, then finally you mustered stiffly, “It hurts me to see you hurting. I like you a lot, Adam, and I want you to see that you deserve better than your ex. That’s why I’m acting different, because I don’t HOW to act.”

Adam’s expression was blank, which disconcerted you very much because you couldn’t tell what he was thinking. Was he going to judge you for your feelings? If he did, then would it be in a positive or negative light?

Your heart and nerves were starting to act up again. It didn’t help that Adam was sitting next to you. All you wanted was to cuddle up next to him, or hold him, just holding hands would be enough. But you didn’t know if you could handle the pressure.

“I understand,” Adam breathed somberly. His voice was quiet and empathetic.

You grit your teeth awkwardly. “So… what does that mean?”

Adam laid down next to you, so close to you that your bodies were touching. You let out a breath and closed your eyes. “You’re a really good person, Y/N. I’m glad you’re with me, but… I can’t be in a relationship right now. But maybe one day.”

You shuddered when you felt his words vibrate through your shoulders, but didn’t say anything. You didn’t know WHAT to say.

It got darker and darker in your small bedroom, as the light dipped away from your long window. Twilight had passed a long time ago, but everything was at peace. You didn’t feel hurried, or anxious. You didn’t feel worried or scared. You didn’t even feel happy or excited. You were just present.

For once you felt at ease. And for the first time the urge was being satisfied. The urge to be as close to Adam Faulkner Stanheight as possible was finally becoming true. But would it remain that way? That was the real question.

“Mind if I stay?” Adam’s low tone was gentle, and echoed a little through the dim room, setting a kind of metallic air to the situation but not quite unsettling it.

You pressed yourself into the mattress, pushing into Adam, and sighed contentedly. Nothing could be better than this. You calmly responded, your voice soft and full of emotion, “No. Please.”

And that was all he needed. He relaxed into you, warming you with his own body heat, keeping you secure against his chest and lulling you sleep.

It was silent after that, all for good reason of course, and encouraged a perfect sleeping atmosphere, allowing an unconsciousness to sweep you both away.

Snow White Kisses - Adam Stanheight / Reader

A/N Been busy, but here’s a short story I managed to write up. Been in a writer's block as well, but please enjoy! Sorry for spelling/grammar mistakes, posting late.

Bright, sparkling, lights gave the room a silver tint. The table was a solid chestnut brown, and the walls and ceiling were creamy. There was only a soft, black, carpet for the flooring. Golden stars were plastered to the walls, as well as red and purple hearts. You leaned way back in the recliner, as the sun sprinkled down on your face. You sat next to the large window, overlooking the beach. The water was smooth today, and not many people were clustered down there. You would have been down there yourself if it wasn’t so cold. The sun soothed your spirits and warmed your skin, making you feel giddy and a little bit lightheaded. You were glad for the distraction.

Adam Faulkner Stanheight would have most definitely been snuggling with you, but he had gone to walk the dog. He’d be back in an hour. No, not even. Probably thirty minutes by now. You couldn’t wait for his return; you were lonely.

You rolled your head from side to side, taking in all the minor details that you hadn’t noticed before; you’d never been in a beach house before and you wanted to remember it. Long white curtains covered all the large, square, windows. They reached all the way to the floor elegantly, and flared out at the end. Paintings of sunsets and twilight scenery were spread throughout the building, covering every other wall majestically.

You felt a chill coming in through the window and stood up to close it, your thin blanket drifting from your fine shoulders, and settling around your feet, on the floor, prettily. You tripped delicately over the soft floor, your feet crossing the carpet swiftly.

Leaning into the misty cool air and allowing your vision to be engulfed by the white layer of snow, you stretched your arm out. It was slippery and chilly, it was almost like you could literally feel the silkworm cocoons. The silk touched your arm gracefully, and made your skin cold. You would have enjoyed the feeling of such silks better if it wasn’t so freezing outside.

In a haze of white, you reached for the window frame, and pulled your hand back again. Softness fell on your skin, and passed through your fingers gently, like wavy fiber. Some white got onto the floor, and you stepped back to examine the snow that was littering half of your living room.

You turned at the sound of a quiet click coming from the front door. Your boyfriend swept into the room swiftly, and the dog followed quickly. She ran up to you and tipped her head lovingly. You rubbed her head and rustled her ears, and then looked up at Adam.

Adam appeared exhausted and out of breath. He let out a long sigh and flopped onto the couch. Leaning back, Adam raised his arms up and rested his head on them. “God,” he mumbled. “The rain is coming down hard.”

You looked at him empathetically. “Did you get drenched?”

“Fortunately not for me,” Adam cast a disapproving glance at the dog. “I can’t say the same for Starshine.” He shuddered obviously.

Starshine gave a loud bark, as if she could understand, and proceeded to chase herself ‘round and ‘round.

The both of you ignored your dog and leaned in close to each other. “How was the walk?” You asked him softly.

Adam smiled happily. “Great! Really, even though it was raining. How was your morning?”

You liked the feeling of your boyfriend in your arms. You huddled closer to Adam. “Extraordinary. But not nearly ‘perfect’. You know what would make it better?”

Adam shook his head, nuzzling your cheek.

“You,” you whispered smoothly.

Adam scoffed at your words. “Oh please…” He was blushing brightly.

You dropped your mouth to his mouth. Your lips were nearly touching but not touching yet. “It’s true, baby. Nothing you can say will change it. You're the light of my life. That one piece of diamond among all the stones. I love you.”

Your breath passed over his lips lightly, making him even more crazy for you. You felt him put his hands up your shirt. You were okay with this, you loved the feeling of his soft skin on you.

“You happy?” You asked him.

“Mmhmm.” He nodded slowly, rubbing his nose up and down your cheek.

You smiled in satisfaction. Seeing Adam go all woozy for you was attractive. It made you feel powerful. It gave you energy.

You put one hand on his chest, and with the other hand you combed your fingers through his hair. Slowly, you pushed closer, kissing him neatly on the lips. It lasted for a moment, and then you pulled away again.

Adam didn’t look pleased. You only cupped his cheeks with both hands, and smiled at him proudly. “My baby,” you murmured.

Adam’s annoyance seemed to dissipate. He groaned a little desperately. “You make me feel so many things!”

You lowered your head down again, this time kissing him harder. You rubbed circles on his cheeks with your thumbs. You could feel Adam’s hands rising up your body.

Electricity pulsed between your mouths, making them tingle slightly. You couldn’t get enough of him!

Adam’s palms skimmed your belly. You took his lower lip in your mouth, and dropped your hands to his waist. You traced them down his thighs. Adam rocked his hips onto you.

You brought your hands up, smirking at him sympathetically. “Someone’s excited.” You observed seductively.

Faulkner let out a sigh. “I can be patient,” he promised insecurely.

You raised a skeptical eyebrow. “Let’s see. I think you’ve been too good for me to be patient.”

You kissed him down the neck, leaving soft traces of you on his skin. Your lips were like cotton candy, soft and sweet. Elegant in movement and graceful in technique. You were tangled up in each other’s hot passion.

You felt your boyfriend break away, gasping and heaving. He had on a look of bliss. You watched him blankly, though your thoughts were running wild and your emotions longed for more.

“Y/N,” Adam wheezed in between breaths. “You mean so much to me…”

You opened your mouth to reply when the sun came out from behind a cloud. It’s golden rays fell on to you, and warmed you all up.

You turned to look out the window, and sighed. “Mmmh, baby. The world is a scary place. I’m glad I’m getting to spend my life in such a safe place; with you.” You put your head on his shoulder. “I love you.”

Adam hugged you back tightly, squeezing all the air out of your lungs, resting his forehead on your collarbones, still breathing heavily, and making the atmosphere hot. “I love you, too,” he hummed out contentedly.

Perfectly.

Longingly.

Nothing was better than this.

A/N I apologize for the mistakes in the last one. This one will be done more carefully. I wrote this one on my phone, btw, so the layout is different. Anyway, enjoy.

The orange tabby cat purred loudly on the couch. He weighed about seventeen pounds, but despite anybody’s best efforts, he just wouldn’t lose it. Most of the time he lazed around, much like his human owners, but his favorite task to do was eat.

You never realized how fat your cat was until he would jump up on your lap. His heaviness pressed you to the couch and kept you there, and often times the pressure would start to hurt your thighs. But you loved him all the same, and really, you didn’t mind the pain you had to endure just in order for your cat to lay on your lap.

Today was no different. You had, just like yesterday, sat upon the couch with the cat. It was three fifteen in the afternoon. Adam Stanheight would be home soon. He went out to a client’s house to help them with taking photographs.

You waited for him everyday at this time. He didn’t always have to go out to work, but this week he’d been extra busy. And as of recently, he hardly had time to produce the photos that he was taking. But nevertheless you would still happily wait for him.

It had been nearly three years since the incident had occurred, but Adam was struggling along fairly well. The only reason he was taking therapy was because you had convinced him to, though he would have much preferred to manage on his own. A year had shown you that Adam was not really good at supporting himself yet; the therapy was definitely needed. And it was certainly helping him drastically, no matter what Adam told you.

Papaya purred proudly as he playfully batted at the strings hanging off your jacket. You didn’t try to stop him, even though you didn’t want him to pull your jacket apart either. Mostly, you didn’t want to make him leave, you were enjoying his company.

Your loneliness was eating you up. Because of your boyfriend’s absence as of late, you hadn’t gotten much time to talk with him. Your short intervals together were precious and very important to you, but it didn’t feel like enough. You missed the time you used to spend together. However, you were glad to see Adam working again as well, as it was a sign of his recovery.

Then, to your disappointment, the cat stretched and padded off your lap. He leapt onto the coffee table and began to bathe. The empty space on your lap left your legs cold.

“Awe, Papaya,” you complained out loud. “I just need some sort of social interaction and comfort. Don’t leave me!”

Papaya jumped off the table and nonchalantly strode up to the front door. He meowed loudly as the door opened up. Adam was behind it, holding his camera in his hands and clutching a grocery bag to his chest.

You hopped up and ran to help. You didn’t need to worry about Papaya because he was a fraidy cat and would stay inside.

Taking the bag from Adam, you greeted him cheerfully and asked him about his day. You were happy to finally have some human company again. All day had been pretty quiet and lonesome.

Adam could see the exhaustion on your face. In one swoop he wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you in close. His camera had been placed on the counter right next to the door, where you had dropped the grocery bag.

He kept his eyes fixed solely on yours.

Adam loved those deep, adoring, eyes.

The ones that were always there for him.

The ones that never hurt him or neglected him.

The ones that hadn’t betrayed him.

The ones he could trust.

In a single rapid breath he told you about everything. Never once did he stop to breathe. His words were rushed and slurred together, but you could understand them. You listened willingly. Adam’s enthusiasm gave you energy. You craved that.

Lived off it.

He started briskly, with eagerness in his voice, “I had the best day!”

You couldn’t believe how happy he looked right now. It warmed you up inside.

“It was… different, (Y/N). I don’t think I’ve ever had so much fun before… I mean before the incident. I forgot what it was like, you know? To actually enjoy doing what I’m doing.” He gasped. “I feel…” he seemed embarrassed to have to admit it. “I feel good.”

“Yeah,” you whispered. Leaning back, you smiled in amusement. You had been working at your job for five years. You loved the way it made you feel, so you could understand what he was feeling. But seeing the way your boyfriend’s face lit up when talking about it, made your heart happy.

Adam lifted you off the ground with both arms and nuzzled his nose against yours. You kicked your feet back and forth with force. He sighed. “I’m so tired now.”

You tried to get down, but Adam wouldn’t allow it. “Why don’t we sit down then?” You questioned.

“Uh…” he considered your words halfheartedly. “I’d prefer to stay here.”

“Then why are you c-“

Adam didn’t let you finish. He promptly kissed you on the mouth, excusing any kind of relations to the previous conversation.

You groaned in surprise, but Adam didn’t want you to leave. He gently set you down on the counter top and proceeded to aggressively make out with you.

Your cat was completely forgotten about by now. In fact, Papaya had meandered somewhere back into the bedroom to take a nap. Apparently, his job now was done. He’d stayed with Y/N all evening so that you wouldn’t get lonely, and once the other human had arrived home he had helpfully announced Adam’s presence. Now it was time for a long nap. Besides, the things that were going down in the kitchen were a bit unpleasant for a cat. And he wanted NOTHING to do with THAT.

You laced your fingers with Adam’s encouragingly, which only tempted him more. With his other hand he stroked your cheek and tilted your head back.

Heart beating excitedly and stomach swimming nervously, you could sense the passion. Heat was pulsing from your cheeks, and longing crisped your lips. You kissed him harder, and tightened your hand on his.

Adam pushed you onto the counter so that you were on your back. You gasped as he pinned your hands to the counter surface.

You smiled timidly up at Adam. “Well, well. What inspired the dominance?”

Adam’s eyes flashed down your body, and then came back up to yours. You felt your body tingle all over while he examined you closely.

“A-Adam…” You whispered.

Adam leaned his head down to your ear. “I love you,” he purred.

You relaxed against the counter, as he started to kiss you again. You had no idea what had gotten him so hyped, but you were all for it.

Your boyfriend backed away after a long time to look at you. “I’d get comfortable.” His voice was soft and flirty. It excited you.

The moment was heated now. You were expecting things to escalate, but you would be just fine if they didn’t. Either way, you eagerly awaited the upcoming events. You pulled him back down, and kissed his cheek. Swiftly, you answered him back with a snarky remark. Your tone held all of your wittiness. “Good luck, baby. We’ll see how long you can dominate.”

Stained - Adam Stanheight / Reader

A/N I had inspiration from Staind's songs, Something to Remind You and Right Here. So, the songs might not be about what I wrote, but this is what I had thought every time I heard them. I hope you enjoy it. (lol, I know naming the story after the artist is cliche and pathetic but I didn't know what else.)

You had a fever of one hundred and six degrees. You could barely feel or see anything. All of it was just a blur, the noise was muffled in the background, and the lights over head gave you something to concentrate on. You were exhausted, and hot. No, blistering was a better word. You felt like you were literally on fire, but you doubted that was the case. If you were on fire, you would be in a lot more pain than you were in now, and not to mention you'd probably be dead.

People moved around you, voices spoke above you, and things flashed in front of your eyes. You couldn't keep track of it all, so you eventually rolled your head to the side and closed your eyes. Your whole body was hot, you were getting hot flashes and chills, you were sweating profusely. You had wet cloths on your skin. Pretty much every part of your body that wasn't covered by the hospital gown, was covered in a wet cloth. The cloths were slightly cold to the touch and you tried to shrink away from them, but someone held it there for you.

Shivering, you tried to sit up only to be shoved back down. Uneasily and a little bit scared, you stared dizzily at the ceiling as yellow, fluorescent, lights flashed past you. Horror filled you as you tried to breath. You thrashed and kicked trying to free yourself, but you only exhausted yourself out greatly. In a matter of seconds heat flashed over you and you passed out.

Adam paced back and forth anxiously. He was desperate to see his significant other wake up, but so far it wasn't like that would be happening any time soon. There was a doctor in the room, watching over Y/N to make sure everything went as planned. He had a grave expression on his face.

"How are they?" Adam demanded for the fourth time.

The doctor stared at him over the rim of his glasses, and said in a clipped tone, "We are working on it."

"Well, clearly you're not doing enough! You can't just let them die! They needs more help!"

The doctor's calm voice answered directly; he was not taking anyone's bullshit. "What Y/N needs is rest. We are trying our best to keep their fever down, but it... Well..." The doctor trailed off, then said, as delicately as possible, "The patient's condition is declining rapidly, you see. Our best efforts may not be enough to help. Y/N might have to fight this on their own."

Adam was thrown off his guard at this. He shook his head repeatedly, as if he was trying to shake honey out of his hair. "You must be dull," he said at last. His tone was cool. "MY partner won't be going ANYWHERE."

"The body won't..." Adam heard the doctor mutter to himself, shuffling through some papers and moving across the room.

Adam was disconcerted now, not to mention a little bit angry. Who was this doctor, thinking he could stroll in here and act like he owned the place? Y/N wasn't going to die! It was quite inconsiderate of him to pretend that they were. Adam wanted to do something, but nothing would come to his mind. As he started pacing again, the doctor said from the corner, "If you've nothing better to do, I suggest you go for a walk."

Adam glared at the doctor. "Who are you to tell me what to do?"

"I'm the person keeping you lover alive, I think I would know a thing or two about health. And staying in here, isn't going to help yours."

Adam stared at the man in reluctance. He felt slightly offended, but also embarrassed. Of course the doctor would want to help EVERYONE he could, which would include Adam himself. The audacity he had to tell Adam to leave while his partner died on a hospital bed was more or less insensitive, but the doctor just wanted to help. That's why he took this job, right? So, really, all in all, how cruel was he being?

It still doesn't matter, Adam thought to himself. He still told me to leave Y/N all alone while they died. That's so overpowering, I think it was just rude at this point.

"No," Adam said quietly, taking a seat next to you. "I'm not going to LEAVE them."

The doctor nodded curtly. "Suit yourself then."

You were in a deep sleep. The covers were all put away, due to the fact that you didn't need to be hotter. You were hyped up on medication all the time, Adam wasn't sure what it was they were using. A towel was on your forehead, you were dressed in pretty cool clothes, but you did have a thin blanket over your lithe body. Your temperature was... wavering, in all honestly. It looked like your fever wasn't even beginning to die down. Adam's heart sank into his stomach miserably.

But unbeknownst to Adam, or even the hostile companion that was the doctor, you were no longer asleep. You had overheard their conversation, but had been unable to speak up. You were tired and weak, but now that you were awake you didn't want to go back to sleep. In fact, you wanted to see Adam one more time before falling asleep again. You feared it would be the last time you would get to.

You started humming to yourself a little bit. You were unsure why that was your first response, but you thought it would be the best way to grab your boyfriend's attention. Subconsciously, you started singing the song that had been playing on your first date with Faulkner. Now that you thought about it, this choice was actually very depressing. In fact, having the song play on your first date had been a little ironic, seeing as a first date was happy and the supposed song was not so much.

The song you were humming was by the artist Staind. You had listened to their songs before, but it wasn't like you deliberately sought them out. This one had a place in your heart because it was the one on the radio during your first date with Adam. Your boyfriend still hadn't heard you singing, but that was alright. The windows were open, so the traffic was loud.

As you kept humming though, you started to have enough strength to say the words. Very carefully, you raised your voice. It was steady and brave, though sickness was evidently present. It dampened your ability to sing, and gave off an eerie feeling to the room, but you couldn't bring yourself to stop; Adam should hear this, you weren't sure how long you had left. "When the day comes... the sun won't touch my face. Tell the ones who cared enough... That I finally left this place-"

"-Y/N!?" Adam exclaimed, looking at you in alarm. His eyes were wide with horror. "Shh! D-Don't say anything, you'll hurt yourself."

But you didn't care about hurting yourself. You simply smiled at him in a soft amusement as you continued, "That's been so cold. Look at my face, all the stories it will tell I can't erase..."

"Y/N, what? That's... the song we heard on the radio-"

You raised a weak hand up to his mouth, and hushed him with your finger. This was something you would never do, but today was different. You needed Adam to listen to you. You traced you thumb down his cheek. "The road is long... just one more song, a little something..."

Adam seemed to understand then what you were tying to tell him, and he got to his knees. He bowed his head on the bed, grasping both of your hands above his head. "You don't know what you're talking about. S-Stop... You're gonna be okay, just... go back to sleep."

You gazed wistfully at Adam's bowed head. "To remind you..."

"Stop it." Adam's voice cracked, and he looked up then. Tears were streaming down his cheeks. "Please."

"When..."

"Don't!" Desperation clawed into Adam's tone. "Don't say it."

"I'm..."

Adam looked at you in the eyes. They were red from crying, and his face was pale white from nerves. "Goddamn it, Y/N! Why are you singing this right now? Are you trying to hurt me?"

You stopped singing and gazed at him dolefully. "I love you, baby." Your voice trembled brokenly.

Adam frowned at you, seeming to come to the conclusion that there was no avoiding this. Not in the slightest. "No."

Smiling encouragingly at him, you felt the need to continue the song. It was only traditional. In a sweet voice you started to sing. You were able to grab some energy and put it into you voice and emotion. You were scared, but at peace, and you needed you Adam to understand that everything was okay; he was okay. The words came out purely, boldly, lovingly. You placed your hand on his face, and traced it weakly down his cheek. Calmly, you sang out, not once stopping, not once faltering, and kept your eyes solely on Adam's. "Something to remind you when I'm gone."

Adam gasped sharply at your words. "Fuck..." he murmured.

"Don't be afraid, Adam... I'll be with you... I promise."

Adam hung his head, as if unable to look at you while the life of his lover was deprived slowly out of their fragile body. You stared at him dishearteningly.

Reluctantly.

Miserably.

"I love you," you repeated.

Adam let out a choked sob. But the words were still mustered, "I love you, too."

You rolled your head to the side. You didn't want to leave him all alone, but there was nothing you could do. You wanted to stay with him and help him recover from this, but, you knew you couldn't do that either. You just had to sit it out, and it would be harder for him to accept your death than it would be for you to die. But the lights started to envelop your vision, they were bright and blinding, and the blistering temperature threatened to swallow you whole, while cold chills ran up and down your back and limbs. Your voice was sore, and your head throbbed painfully; You had to get out of here, it was too painful.

You forced yourself into the bed and tried not to thrash, your suffering ten times worse now. The light expanded and you were consumed entirely, leading you into a black well of dark. It was quiet here, and not so hot. Your cold flashes had stopped and you felt energized at last. As you gazed around the place you couldn't really see anything. However the song that was playing caught your attention. It was perfect, though, not the song you had been humming earlier. It was Staind again, and this song seemed to accompany the last one so well, it hurt. It was the ending of the song, and it just had to be this one that was playing. You listened closely, and realized the lyrics resonated within you strongly. You couldn't even believe how much you related to them. It was funny how once you had experienced the life lesson, how painstakingly obvious the truth hurt. You closed your eyes and listened. You knew this song as well.

But I always find a way, to keep you right here waiting.

I always find the words to say, to keep you right here waiting.

But you always find a way, to keep me right here waiting.

You always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting.

If I chose to walk away, would you be right here waiting, searching for the things to say, to keep me right here waiting?

An emptiness filled you up. "I miss you already," you whispered aloud. It was cold - too cold - and you drifted back, feeling Adam's presence fading. Peace would find Adam eventually, even if it was only a phantom of a feeling; a stain of ruin splashed across the art. He would make it.

Yes, he would.

Happily Ever After - Adam Stanheight X Reader

It was your favorite month. The temperature was perfect, and the trees were beautiful. The sky was exactly the way you wanted, as you marched down the sidewalk. Your favorite shoes skidded across the pavement gently, barely making a sound. You stumbled along, a cool wind blowing at your clothes.

You had left your apartment not long ago to find Adam Stanheight, your boyfriend. He lived across the block from you. Your apartment was in much better shape than his, but considering his current circumstances, the reasons were valid.

Tripping a little bit over your own feet, you came to Adam’s apartment. He had given you a spare key a while back, so you could easily get inside. The only things that disconcerted you were the other people already in the building. They gave you nasty, judgmental, looks. It seemed they didn’t like you being there. This was nothing new, Adam’s neighbors had made it evidently clear that you did not belong here. They hardly let you pass by them without making sharp remarks. Adam was the reason they stopped. Self-consciously, you walked by and up the stairs, to Adam’s room. It was silent all the way there.

When you creaked the door open you were unsatisfied to find the lights turned off, the windows shuttered and Adam’s coat missing from the coat hanger, as well as his shoes missing from their place by the door. You clicked the door closed behind you, and ventured inside hesitantly. “Adam?” Your voice echoed lonely around the entire room. You flicked on the lights.

They buzzed dully, but you didn’t mind. Adam’s camera wasn’t on the coffee table. His ashtray hadn’t been emptied yet today. The smoke scent was strong, but you tried not to think about it.

You checked, halfheartedly, in the bedroom and the bathroom, and - of course - Adam’s dark room. Apparently, he wasn’t home. Where was he?

You had been with Adam for at least three years. You both thought it was best to take things slow for a while, whilst he recovered mentally from Jigsaw’s game. You were proud of him. He had come a long way from where he was before, though sometimes he would still have panic attacks, as was understandable.

Lately though, the two of you had been thinking about moving in together. It was Adam’s idea actually, and you had been surprised when he brought it up. Of course you could understand that his apartment might not be the healthiest place for Adam to be, but it was the only place that had a dark room available. It seemed Adam was ready to leave the trauma of the past behind completely now and start new. You would love to support him through that.

He had asked you to come over today, to maybe help with packing but maybe not; he hadn’t been precise about that. You wandered around for a couple minutes longer, and then figured you had no reason being here, and left.

Standing on the staircase in the wind, you tried to call your boyfriend, but he didn’t pick up his phone. This alarmed you because usually he was quick to answer his calls, especially if it was you calling. You called your best friend. Maybe they would know?

“Hello?”

Yes! You got an answer!

“Hi.”

“Y/N! Oh, W-What do you need?”

You noticed how your friend had stammered.

What the hell?

“Uh…” You said thoughtfully. “I was looking for Adam. Have you seen him?”

“No.” The response was too instantaneous for your liking.

“You haven’t seen him? Do you know where he is?”

Silence on the other end, then, “No.”

“ ‘No’?” You repeated skeptically.

“No,” your bff confirmed.

You frowned. “Well, will you call him for me? He won’t pick up. I tried calling him just now, but I also tried at my apartment.”

“Why don’t you wait? He’ll be back before long. Or are you paranoid that he’s seeing someone else?” There was a suspicious silence and then your friend burst out laughing. “Relax, I’m joking.”

“I am relaxed,” you said matter-of-factly. “You don’t have to tell me that he wouldn’t cheat on me. I know that, you idiot.”

“Awe. Did you hear that? Yeah? I know.”

Your friend was having a conversation with someone else, but you couldn’t hear who it was. You couldn’t hear them at all. “Who are you with?”

“One of the other friends. Now we will have juicy gossip for the group.”

“Right,” you sighed irritably. “Where is Adam? I thought we were going to pack some things so he could move in with me?”

“I don’t know,” your best friend sounded genuine. “Listen, Y/N, I don't know where he went, and I would love to help you but I’m busy right now. I’m sorry. Maybe just wait for him to get back. He’ll answer you when he returns to the apartment.”

“Okay, well, should I start packing up his things, or not?”

“It’s up to you.”

“I’m at his apartment right now.”

“Sure. I mean, he would probably appreciate the help.”

“Really, you’re sure you don’t know where he is?”

Your best friend only said, “I’m sorry, Y/N.” And hung up.

You scowled at the floor in annoyance. That had been uneventful… There was definitely something up with them though. That was some seriously strange behavior.

You gathered up your things once again, and went back inside. This time the hall was empty, no passersby to see you. You were mildly grateful for that.

You started in the living room, examining certain things and contemplating what to do with them. For now, you were just gonna leave everything in its place because you didn’t know how Adam wanted to situate his any of if for moving. You would just consider solutions and strategies and then consult your boyfriend when he got home. Whenever that would be.

Sitting on the couch to get comfortable while you waited, you pushed open the windows. While you tolerated the smoke smell for Adam, this was obnoxious. Why were the windows closed when the scent was so strong? You pushed a window open just as your phone lit up with a message.

You lunged for it, hoping it was Adam. You were disappointed to find that it was just a scam text asking you to click the link to some sketchy porn site. You made a face in disgust. That kind of thing did not hold your interest… Unless of course you were performing with Adam...

You tossed the phone next to you onto the couch, and went back to opening up windows, though your thoughts were now preoccupied about what kind of THINGS you might get up to with Adam, since you were on the subject already…

Unfortunately, you thought reluctantly. Adam isn’t here for me to ‘perform’ anything with.

You spent about fifteen minutes sitting on the couch, trying to figure out packing arrangements. There were already some things put in boxes and sealed away, but mostly everything was piled everywhere. You did notice though, Adam’s camera resting carefully and securely on the breakfast table. It was evident that Adam took more care of his very expensive camera than the rest of his belongings. This did not surprise you.

Absently, you picked it up in your delicate hands, and turned it over a few times. Adam would be panicking if he was here; he got way too anxious if the camera wasn’t in his own hands. But… he was not here… Which - you should have admitted to yourself first, but were too preoccupied with your discovery - this fact did not give you permission to go snooping through his privacy.

Hesitantly, you turned it on. It came on immediately, which only made you realize even more how good this camera was. This was like, top-notch perfect. No wonder it had been so expensive. No wonder Adam took such good care of it. No wonder he preserved it like it was the last one in existence. This was a damn good camera.

It felt cool on your fingers, and the buttons worked perfectly. None of them were sticky, or oversensitive. Just one gentle tap was enough to get the desired reaction.

And not to mention the photos inside. Adam had a talent for photography, that much was already apparent, but these were like… nothing you’d ever seen. They were clear, and straight on. Sometimes they were from angles so that the sun crossed right over the lens.

There were pictures of people, mostly you and sometimes Adam, but there were mostly pictures of the scenery. This must not have been his work camera, though even that one was just as expensive as this one.

Your breath had been taken from you, as you set his camera back on the table. The photos he’d taken of you were… amazing… Well, all his photos were amazing, but you hadn’t thought that you could be highlighted in such an incredible way. You hadn't even looked through all of them because you did feel guilty about prying. Adam would show you when he was ready to show you, and that’s what you were looking forward to.

You went back to the couch and peered out the window. There was traffic on this tiny road? Bizarre. Usually this street was empty. Police lights flashed passed and then the traffic cleared.

Frowning, you considered a fact about today. Today so far had been really, really, strange… You hadn’t found your boyfriend, even after a long time of searching, your bff seemed to be hiding something, and the events of the day were just weird; like for example a police car driving down the quietest street in your town.

For the first time you felt a little off, like you had teleported through another dimension and no one even knew who you were. It was an alarming feeling. You didn’t like it.

You stretched your legs out on the coffee table, wondering if Adam would mind if you turned on the TV. It seemed a little inappropriate to just… be at his house while he wasn’t there, but you were really freaked out, and… watching something to get your mind off it seemed like the best course of action. Or maybe you should just go home? That was a smart idea, right now you were essentially trespassing!

But… Adam would be home any second now, you were sure of it. Just a little longer… Just a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt anyone, and besides Adam wasn’t going to report his girlfriend for trespassing. He would understand.

Where is he? I haven’t seen him all day. I worry about him sometimes, does he know that?

After a moment’s hesitation, you took the TV remote into your hand. It was then that the door was pushed open wide, casting light into the dark room, and revealing a very tense Adam Faulkner Stanheight.

The remote slipped from your fingers dejectedly, hitting the floor with a quiet thud as you were no longer interested in it anymore. Running for your boyfriend, you called his name a couple times, apologizing for the unintended hangout at his place.

Adam smiled at you warmly, as he wrapped his arms around your waist and bent his head down to kiss you. You leaned into it willingly, moaning in surprise.

Adam pulled his head away again, and examined you. There was a gleam of adoration in his eyes. He shivered, and, without even looking away from you, said, “You opened the windows?”

You were flabbergasted. This man didn’t have to look to know you had opened them; he was so… amazing… “Yeah,” you whispered.

Adam raised a hand to your cheek, and held it for a moment, then brushed a strand of hair out of your face. His hand was warm and gentle. You pushed your head into his grasp. It was silent between you for a long time. Neither of you broke eye contact, or pulled away. This moment was perfect; exactly what you both needed.

“Adam?” You asked eventually.

Adam’s gaze flickered down your face for a moment, then back to your eyes. “Hmm?” He seemed so at peace, you didn’t want to bother him with the question.

“Where have you been?”

“ ‘Where have I been’?” Adam wondered aloud. “Well, let’s see…” He trailed off as your best friend walked into the room.

“I’mma watch the action’ah,” they popped their lips at the end.

You spun around to face them. “What are you doing? I thought you were with friends?”

“Adam’s my friend, isn’t he?”

You stared back at your bff, feeling slightly indignant, and jealous. “What the hell!?”

Your friend only nodded to Adam, a smile on their face. “Don’t jump to conclusions, baby.” There was sarcasm in their voice on the last word.

Flustered, you turned back around in a rush, not able to look at your friend anymore. You were sure it wasn’t what you thought it was, but why had they gone off to do something without you? Something wasn’t right about that.

You nearly fainted at what was in front of you.

On one knee, with his hands outstretched, was your boyfriend, looking rather smug with himself. A ring was placed in the middle of a tiny, black, box. “Will you marry me, F/N L/N?” He asked very bluntly.

Your heart seemed to stop beating. Your mind seemed to shut off. You were just… so stunned you were unemotional. All you could do was stare at Adam. “I-I-I-” You stopped talking at once.

The two others in the room were watching you intently, stiffly, apprehensively.

“I,” you found your voice finally. “Don't know what to say!”

Adam looked at you dumbly. “ ‘Yes’? ‘Yes’ would be preferable, please!”

And you realized that, in your current state of bliss, you had indeed forgotten to enlighten your boyfriend on your answer, which to yourself had been obvious - of course! You would spend everything to marry Adam! That’s what love was, right?

“Yes!” You exclaimed guiltily. “I’m so sorry, I was so shocked, you know? ‘Cause I wasn’t even thinking about the question, I was just thinking about the state of affairs, I can’t believe that this is happening right now, you know, I didn’t mean to leave you -” You said in a single breath. You were so busy you didn’t even notice when Adam stood up. In one fell swoop, Adam’s lips were back on yours, silencing you abruptly. You melted into his embrace, bringing your arms up around his neck, pushing into him, giving him all of yourself.

Your heart fluttered, your cheeks were hot, and your lips were tingling. Inside you felt a thousand things at once, but all of them were stemmed by one thing - joy. Adam pulled you closer to him, if that was even possible; you both were already practically standing on top of each other's feet. A couple of gasps and sighs were released but it was nothing that forced you to stop the make-out session. In fact, it only encouraged it more.

Somewhere behind you both, your friend arranged themself on the couch, tucking their feet under their butt, and staring, eyes wide, at the scene in front of them. If there was popcorn, they’d definitely be eating right now.

Adam let his hands trail your body, and you allowed him to feel you. He stopped kissing you to whisper in your ear, “I love you. I’m sorry I ditched you earlier, but… I do love you.”

“(bff’s name) was with you, buying the ring?”

Adam nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t want to get it wrong.”

“You wouldn’t have,” you whispered back, burying your face into his shoulder. “All that would matter was that you got me something beautiful. All gems are gorgeous, I think. Especially if they’re on a ring.”

Adam hadn’t gotten you something large, but you appreciated that, you had room to move your fingers. But it was still a very pretty color. Your favorite gemstone was in the middle, and the ring part was embedded with your birthstone. You couldn’t believe how pretty it looked altogether. “Adam,” you murmured desperately. Adam brushed his fingers through your hair. “I wouldn’t have made it this far without you, Y/N.”

“Don’t say that.”

“No,” Adam insisted. “You convinced me to keep up the photography. You convinced me to get therapy. You convinced me to… try to stop smoking…”

You laughed. “Yeah. The last one has yet to work. I don’t think I did very much convincing.”

“You convinced me to propose,” Adam admitted attentively.

You pulled back, smiling in amusement. “How so?”

“Well, last night, after -” he seemed to remember that there were more than TWO people in the room with you and started again. “What you said last night got me thinking about how much I love you.”

“Adam.” You shook your head dishearteningly. You hadn’t meant to pressure him. “I said ‘we have a unique relationship, I wonder where it will take us,’ not ‘I want you to propose to me tomorrow.’

“I do want this, though,” Adam continued hastily. “I was just nervous before. But what you said last night convinced me that I was ready to take things to a different level with you.”

“Well I’m glad you asked, because I want this, too. And the answer would have always been ‘yes’. And I’m glad that you want this. That’s what’s important.”

“It’s also important what you want,” Adam chimed in.

But I’M not the one with the trauma, you thought to yourself. You wouldn’t bring THAT up right now, but that was the reason why your relationship was moving slowly. You chuckled under your breath. Adam was way too wholesome for you.

“What?” Adam asked. “What did I say?”

You grit your teeth. “Nothing,” you told him firmly. “I’m just happy that you're happy.”

Adam smiled at you, then looked up at the third wheeler on the couch, who was leaning over their legs in utter astonishment. “Was that good?” He questioned.

“That was wonderful,” your friend exclaimed.

“Adam needed a pep talk? Really?”

“No, Adam needed confidence,” your bff retorted, then stretched and stood up lazily. “I think I’ll be leaving now. I don’t think I’m of any service here anymore.”

The couple didn’t object to the previously stated statement, in fact they were in full agreement. You watched your friend exit the apartment, and then close the door behind them. “So did you get any packing done?” Adam wondered hopefully. “You said you were going to.”

“I did some planning. But I wanted to confirm it with you first,” you confessed.

“Oh.” Adam shrugged. “I have no idea how to start! Anything works!”

“Nice!” You said, all your ideas coming to the front of your mind. “Let’s do it tomorrow, yeah? I’m tired. You know I was up late LAST NIGHT.”

Adam scoffed. “Baby, how could I forget LAST NIGHT?”

You walked into the bedroom, with Adam following closely - too closely. You got the sense that tonight and last night were going to be pretty similar. There was one key difference though. Could you guess it?

Of course.

You weren’t going to sleep next to your boyfriend anymore, you were going to sleep next to your fiance.

Now what did you think about that?

Wishful Thinking- Adam Stanheight/Reader

A/N, okay like a warning. I write on my computer so this is gonna be a long one. IDK if that's what tumblr's for but... this is for anyone who wants it.

You hadn't slept in days. It had been rough with the loss of someone so close to you and you often had to think back to a time when life wasn't so hard. It was difficult, seeing as you had lost two precious people right after the other. The thing was, you couldn't seem to remember who it was you had lost. Could it have been your mother? Could it have been your father? Or was it a distant relative? A second cousin? A third cousin? Maybe an aunt or an uncle? In any case, the fact still remained, you couldn't recall who had passed away. It was almost like, you chose not to remember.

But why would someone like you want to forget the people who had passed? Wouldn't they be special to you? Didn't you have a relationship of some kind with the deceased? It shouldn't be so blurry. This was... nonsense! You weren't that heartless of a person. At least, you hoped you weren't... And you certainly didn't srive to be. But it didn't matter anymore. You were home, a pie was baking in the oven, and your significant other was working in his darkroom.

You had moved in with your boyfriend six months ago. He was nice, but... he had anxiety issues. Not like it was easy to recover from one of Jigsaw's games, but... it was a work in progress. His therapist said he was doing well. You sat down on the couch, the smell of cigarette smoke filled your nose. It was a relaxing scent; it made you think of HIM: Adam Faulkner Stanheight.

Speaking of which, out of nowhere Adam appeared around the corner. He was setting up some pictures in his darkroom. It was nearly eleven thirty, but you didn't mind, you liked staying up with Adam. Although, he had kept you out of the room this time, claiming that he was going to surprise you with this new set of photos. You were suspicious. Not that you didn't trust Adam, but... mostly, you were concerned about what embarrassing pictures Adam had taken of you behind your back. You weren't looking forward to finding out.

You gestured to the spot next to you all the same. It would take some time for the pictures to develop anyway, and Adam wasn't about to ruin the surprise. He had a grim look on his face. It worried you. "Is everything okay?"

Adam sat down next to you, and stared at the coffee table dully. His eyes were dark, and unseeing. After a long couple minutes, in which you started to wring your hands, he spoke at last. His words were slow and thoughtful, and his voice was hollow, but you could detect some kind of worry in it. "I just realized one day, you're gonna be gone. Then what will I do? Once you leave me and never come back, I don't think I'll be the same again."

You looked at Adam in alarm. What did he think was going to happen to you? You were completely fine and well. "Adam," you said soothingly, patting him on the shoulder. "Why are you worrying about that right now? I'm not going anywhere for a long time. I promise." You turned his head towards you, and he looked at you desolately. You leaned over and kissed him on the lips. You hadn't been expecting such a vehement reaction from Adam. Apparently he was eager to continue.

He lifted you from the couch and put you on his lap, never once removing his lips from yours. You started to smile at his affection, but Adam gave you no breathing time; he wanted more of you. So, you obliged.

Pushing him up against the couch, you kissed him harder, deeper, fiercer. You felt Adam sink into the couch willingly, tilting his head upwards in order to give you a better angle. You combed your fingers through his hair, tempting him to relax entirely.

There was no rush.

Everything was going to be fine.

You were right here.

Adam had his hands up your shirt in a matter of seconds, traveling up and down your body. You leaned into him, feeling him speed up the kiss. Your heartbeat was hammering, your cheeks were burning, and your head felt light. You loved the way Adam made you feel. But before anything could start, you pulled away. "I love you," you whispered.

"I love you more," Adam said softly and you chuckled.

"Undoubtedly," you agreed.

The oven blared loudly from behind you, and you stood up. "Hang on, baby. I don't want to burn the apartment down. Besides don't you want to try the blackberry pie?"

Adam gazed at the oven distantly. Fear flashed across his face, but it was gone so quickly you had a hard time believing what you saw. "Are you okay if I leave to go get the pie?"

The oven beeped again.

Adam didn't look at her. He leaned forward. "Don't go," he whispered to himself over and over. "Don't go, don't go, don't go..."

"I'm just getting out the pie, Adam. Where do you think I'm gonna go?"

Adam looked at her, a realization seemed to have sunk in. He seemed calm now, but dispirited. "Y-Yeah," he stammered slowly. "I guess I can't keep you here forever. I... hate this part... I wish... Oh, never mind I'm not gonna say that. You'll see for yourself any moment now."

Adam's words disconcerted you to an exceedingly far amount. You threw him a fearful glance. "Uh, what?"

"No, don't worry about it." Adam smiled. "Come on, I'll go with you." He brushed past you hastily, and began to open the oven.

Hesitantly, you turned around and stared after him. He was setting the pie on the stove now, allowing it to cool, but something didn't seem right. You now had less motivation to walk over and help him. You wouldn't have, if it wasn't for the smile he shot you. Surely, Adam was just being anxious. You approached him, your feet feeling heavy like stones.

As you neared the kitchen you could see the look in Adam's eyes. There was sadness, and a little bit of reluctance, but he didn't stop you from going. Finally, as your feet reached the tile of the kitchen floor, there was a wave of blurriness and you collapsed onto the ground.

You awoke with a raging headache, wet eyes, and a dry throat. You coughed a couple times and then raised your head. You found yourself in a busy bar. The lights were blinding you in streaks and the music blasted your eardrums. You gazed around dazedly, shuddering at the ache in your neck. It had formed from sleeping over the counter for so long. There was a glass of something next to you. It appeared to contain some alcoholic beverage, but you couldn't remember what it was you ordered.

You felt alone suddenly. Coldness seeped into your body, as the harsh reality sunk in. You turned around, not wanting to believe it, and called for Adam, but you were alone. Utterly and miserably alone. And then you remembered.

It came back in a flash so overwhelming you nearly fell off the bar stool. Your boyfriend hadn't survived Jigsaw's game. Your heart was ripped in half as you realized this. You almost couldn't move, and you burst into tears. You had been dating him for a year and a half, your lives had been going smoothly, and then John Kramer took him from you. You screamed and ignored the people who looked at you, that wasn't really something you were concerned about right now.

Halfheartedly, you began to trudge over to the door. You needed to get home, and clean up. There was something you hadn't done yet. You had been too scared to do it at first, but now you felt brave enough. Though your dream had mostly been wishful thinking, there was something true behind it. The darkroom had been left unattended for a while now, and Adam had been working on something for you on the day he had died. It seemed that your dream had given you a revelation.

Through a haze, you drove back to Adam's apartment. After his death, you didn't move out. You wanted to stay in the apartment because it was the last thing you had of him. That and the rest of his belongings. You couldn't leave this place, the thought gave you extreme anxiety. You bundled yourself into the apartment, and looked around the room.

Instantly, you had flashbacks to your dream. You glanced at the couch, and your heart felt heavy. You could feel Adam's hands on your body, and feel his lips on your mouth. The smoke had long ago been filtered out, but you could still smell and taste the dry flavor. You swallowed, and looked back in the kitchen. There was no pie baking there now, it hurt you too much to acknowledge this.

You lightly crossed the wooden floor and glided over to the darkroom. It had been three months since you had gone in there.

Three months since you had talked to Adam.

Three months since you had been WITH Adam.

Three months since the DEATH of Adam.

You gasped as you put your hand on the cold and dusty doorknob. The door creaked sorrowfully, as it pitifully gave in to your demands. It was dark inside, which was ironic, seeing as the purpose of the room was to be lit up. And the name made it funny, it was a 'darkroom' after all.

Unenthusiastically, you stepped inside. Your hand trailed the wall, like it had done many times before, and flicked on the red lights above. They came on with a light buzz, they were older than you had expected them to be. Had Adam even changed them while he was still alive? You let your eyes fall upon the photos that were all strung up in a row. They had developed nicely, it seemed.

You plucked one off the line and held it up to the light. It was a picture of you, in all your glory. You were in your best outfit, sitting in a patch of sunlight on the couch. The setting sun captured your face and darkened everything else, highlighting only your face. The rest was in dim shadow, so you could still see it but nothing was drawing attention to it.

The other pictures were similar but not the same. The majority was of you, but there were still a good number that were of you and him together. They were taking from interesting angles, with different lighting. Sometimes he was posing and other times you were posing. You couldn't help biting your quivering lip. This was all too much! Why hadn't Adam been here to see your reaction? Why hadn't he given them to you from the beginning? Why hadn't you looked at these before now? Why, why, why, why?

Sadness tugged at your heart and you sat down on your knees, clutching the photographs to your chest. You wouldn't be giving these up. They were too precious for you. You couldn't think properly; your mind felt like it had lost all of its abilities. The only thing you knew how to do was cry. You missed him. You missed him so much. The world was lifeless and hopeless, nothing would ever be the same. All you wished was to be back in that moment within your dream, outside was too gruesome. But alas you could not go back to then, and you were trapped in this miserable hellhole. You wondered why your life was so unfortunate. What had you done to deserve this?

In your fit of sobs and whimpers, you lost yourself to the grief. A long time passed after that, and you spent it all on the floor, but as the light peaked over the horizon and spilled through the living room window, your crying was put to a stop, and you yourself were dragged down by something stronger, and certainly much more necessary; slumber held you close and refused to let you go but something more was there, hidden under the photos that were pressed firmly to your bosom. There was something familiar about the warmth though, almost like it was Adam's loving embrace. It wreathed around you, and in the darkness it soothed you into a fitful burrow of sleep from which you did not know if you would even awaken.