Silly AU #1

Silly AU #1

Imagine if Vladimir and Ștefan focused on living their best life instead of relentlessly perusing their vengeance against the Volturi.

[Vladimir x Ștefan]

Vladimir works as a ghost writer for a History magazine. His lengthy articles are extremely detailed and accurate.

Ștefan somehow works as a Natural Science professor at a local university. Every student wants to enroll in his courses because he's the funny, easy-going and relaxed professor.

Sometimes Ștefan's students spot him around town on his red convertible. They also spot the professor's Mysterious Boyfriend™, who hides behind his long white hair and sunglasses.

They live in a pretty loft that has a magnificent view of the city below them. Each night they spend some time looking at the city bustling and have a toast.

Vladimir with human girl headcannons please and thanks? 💞☺️

It takes this vampire forever to admit that he has feelings for a human.

He's forgotten everything about humans, from the fact that they have to sit from time to time to the fact that need to eat regularly and not once in a fortnight.

He's lived isolated for a long time, but still tries his best to update his skills.

"Hey Y/N, what is woke and how do I get it?"

Would 100% love it when his human mate buys him clothes. He loves the soft fabrics like wool and flannel, but wears things like jeans because he saw just how much his girlfriend loves it.

He would shower the girl with gifts, with no apparent reason other than "I saw, it reminded me of you/how much I love you, so I got it for you".

Tries to keep the relationship secret to protect her from the Volturi.

Ștefan is the official Third Wheel™.

The human girl would get a flat for the two three of them, not far from one of their semi-abandoned castles. Vladimir decorates it with trinkets from his life and she absolutely adores it.

He wants to turn her as soon as the relationship gets serious. She asks him to wait but a few months later, when she's sitting in am armchair in front of the fire pit with the syntomps of the flu, he kneels in front of her and begs her to let him change her.

"I've never begged in my entire life, yet here I am. I don't want to lose you, and you deserve to be happy. Let me change you".

VLADIMIR HEADCANONS PLS

So, I kinda cheated because I said that requests were closed so that I could get back on the old ones, but honestly this headcanons just came to me. Naughty anon successfully tempted me!

For the last couple of months, he's let his hair grow out and just loves it when Ștefan braids or styles it.

At first, he wasn't fond of the nomadic lifestyle, because he understandably missed all the comforts his previous life as a king/emperor gave him.

He l o v e s swimming, especially in natural lakes.

Has a beautiful singing voice, he is constantly humming under his breath.

Sometimes he eats human food, even if it does weird things to his vampire body.

He's fluent in pretty much all the European languages.

At first he wasn't fond of the nomadic lifestyle, because he missed of the comforts his previous life as a king/emperor offered him. Slowly, Ștefan made him look on the bright side of the situation: they get to explore marvelous places, meet all kinds of people and even have a certain freedom.

He befriended Demetri. Well, half seduced him and half befriended him. Now every time the tracker "hunts them down", they all have a great time partying and hunting.

He likes music and he loves dancing. His favorite partner of all times is Ștefan; once he joked that he was glad Ștefan survived the wars because he could never survive without his dancing partner.

He likes sitting at those little tables in the streets.

He supports Ștefan no matter what, and is 100% commited to him. He's also very protective of the brunette.

He's a very good kisser. And like, the king of cuddles, even if he doesn't flaunt it.

Has a weird moral compass: he's not a vegetarian vampires because he doesn't have the heart to kill "those poor animals".

Speaks Ștefan's dialect solely to please him.

Likes to lay in meadows.

Thanks to Demetri, he wears clothes that suits him well and he's aware of that. Nonetheless, every and each time someone compliments him, he giggles and turns away.

He's hypnotized by fire, from small candles to bonfires.

He's a great storyteller but literally never mentions the Great Fall™, if not for some vague and non important details.

Surprisingly, he knows how to drive.

Sometimes, on Date Night™ he wears eyeliner.

He would never admit it, but he wants to enjoy life with Ștefan more than he wants to go back to his position as a king/emperor.

Volturi guard + guilty pleasures

Has long bubble baths, for which he uses tons of products. From bath bombs to conditioner, this man spares no expenses when it comes to his personal beauty routine.

He lives for shopping. Like obviously he buys the latest trend of clothes, for his wardrobe is always up to date, but he also likes to buy what cannot be described as nothing else if not "useless stuff". He accumulates so many things that periodically, say every month or two, Felix and Heidi have to help him clear out his rooms. Usually, the majority of the objects gets handed out to someone from the coven.

He flirts with absolutely everyone and anyone just because he can (he necessarily doesn't want to do anything with the people he first with).

On his days off, he never gets out of his pajamas. Why does he even own pajama? To see Demetri's Iconic Eye Roll™.

Whenever he's driving a car, he sings loudly the most obnoxious songs. Sometimes passengers like Jane and Alec join him, but once again Demetri is annoyed.

Basically one of Felix's guilty pleasures is annoying Demetri.

Jane loves people watching. Whenever she's out and about she always take time to sit for a bit and watch the people around her. She's both fascinated and repulsed by the humans, who hurry for no reason at all in her eyes. When Alrc joins her, they comment what they see. Sometimes Alec purposely brings Jane out when she's upset for some reason so that she can let her rage out with mean comments to strangers rather than in the castle.

She loves make up and continues to buy the lasted trend, even if she already owns the equivalent amount of items that can be found in any make up shop. Sometimes, when she's in a good mood, she's accompanied by Demetri during these trips to make up stores.

She loves make up not only on herself but also on other people. Everyone in the castle let her practice on them, from Aro, who usually requests something with an excessive amount of glitter, to Demetri, who totally rocks the basic look of eyeliner and lipstick. Even Alec let's her practice on his face, sitting patiently while she figures out contouring. Felix loves when she finds a particular shade of lipstick, like green or blue.

He loves proving his sister wrong about something.

He sometimes continues to play video-game even after his presence has been requested elsewhere -but he only does this when he's sure there won't be dire consequences.

Likes to watch on to the next episode of a box set, ahead of his viewing partners, Felix and Demetri, who inevitably discover his betrayal and kick him out of Movie Night, only to apologize and let him in not even 5 minutes later.

Hi! I saw that in one of your posts you said that our bois Vlad and Stef bit people with Covid-19. Isn't that dangerous? :/ Also why would they do that?

Hello curious human! My idea is that Vladimir and Stefan have a bet each year to decide where to spend the holidays. This year’s bet was: whoever saved the most humans affected by Covid-19 won.  Soon they started to realize that they could turn the situation in their favour... Our favourite Romanian vampires had two weapons up their sleeves. One: take the humans to a hospital, so that the humans would owe them a favour. Two: change a good part of the humans, so that they would have an army without the Volturi finding out. 

The second part is what’s really interesting! I think that the Volturi get their information throught official sources, so they actually wouldn’t know that Vladimir and Stefan are creating an army because, well, the patients officially fell to the desease! Evil but genius. 

To answer to your question: I personally don’t think it’s dangerous for vampires to bite humans affacetd by any deasease. Maybe they can taste a change in the blood’s taste, but that’s about it. 

A tiny author’s note: this is my very personal way to deal with the pandemic. I don’t want to offend or trigger anyone. Sorry if I did. Stay safe everyone! 

Semi-silly Demetri headcanons

He is scared of snakes. You can only imagine how awful it was while he was living with Amun in Egypt.

He is constantly worried that he smells bad. He showers twice a day and scrubs his skin so vigorously that he almost irritates it. People joke that they can find him following his scent; he laughs but he's truly happy. Felix is the only one who knows that at the lowest point of his human life, Demetri couldn't stand the smell of his family's house -he comes from a very poor family.

His conquests are immediately drawn and open to him, they like to tell him things they never told anyone else. He's more closed and doesn't share a single personal thing. He likes to bathe with his favorite partners, those with whom he feels a deep connection; with them he feels free. Only Felix and Heidi made it to his bathtub.

Always lets Felix choose the name of his pets because of a lost bet a few centuries ago.

Doesn't allow anyone to borrow his clothes because he's secretly worried that they would suit other people better.

Always has to go to Felix or Alec for help when he tries to use technology.

He's banned from game night because he's too easily irratated when playing board games.