You Know What They Say About Assuming: It's A Natural And Fundamental Aspect Of Communication

you know what they say about assuming: it's a natural and fundamental aspect of communication

when you talk to someone else, you are making subconscious assumptions that you both have:

similar definitions of words

trustworthy info or advice

a grasp of what is or isn't a joke

fully expressed thoughts

a clear understanding of all key points

all of these, and especially the latter, are frequently untrue! and there is often no way to know unless you spend five times as long discussing the fine details of every single point, which is simply not feasible... especially when you don't know what details are missing.

this is where assumptions come in, because once the speaker is done talking, the listener needs to fill in the bigger picture somehow. and those details are often filled in subconsciously via quick decision making – by instinct, if you will.

it was the speaker's job to either fill in those details, or expect the listener to do it instead. but when the listener gets it "wrong," the speaker gets to... blame the listener for making independent decisions, aka "assumptions"?? how is that fair at all???

and after the listener hears this again, and again, and AGAIN, the listener eventually learns that they cannot trust their own decision making, instincts, or ability to communicate... even when the real issue was the speaker's miscommunication and lack of clarity.

and sure, the listener may have misheard too; communication is a two-way street, and both parties can get it wrong. but assumptions themselves are not the issue – assumptions mean there's a lack of communication that needs addressing. focus on that!

you know what they say: people who assume everyone else is bad at communicating, are probably bad at communicating themselves

today's Gender Realization: as a kid i was teased when i acted like a girl AND when i acted like a boy. teased when my hair got long, teased for playing in the sand, teased for going down the "wrong" toy aisle, teased for going down the RIGHT toy aisle, what do you want from me??

as i grew older it only got more complicated: i had very few role models in my life outside of TV, which often depicted men as violent, women as temptresses, and positive qualities as punchlines.

and, ugh, my parents explained NOTHING about puberty. it was all just more teasing!

multiply all that by autism and is it any wonder that my gender identity was so repressed? that i started at nonbinary because i was so confused by everything and everyone?? that even now i worry my boy feelings are """toxic""" and my girl feelings are """lustful"""???

it's only as an adult that i've seen positive reflections, depictions, and discussions of gender in my life… and they're all queer.

every. single. one.

(i could say the same for relationships, honestly…)

skyso.me

Skysometric

Here's where you can find Skysometric on the web!

i made a links page! it's pretty snazzy~

all of the animations on the site, including the opening animation above and the icon animations below, are made entirely with css – no javascript here! the icon animations for the social media icons are particularly fun, you should go see them for yourself 👀

the only javascript on the page powers some keyboard shortcuts, like skipping the animation with esc / tab, or switching between ☀️light and 🌙dark theme with L

i made the site with extensibility in mind, so i can easily add more links later. colors automatically cycle between blue, purple, and pink, and the icons automatically swap to the left or right; all i have to do is add text and an icon, and the css does the rest of the heavy lifting.

i can even add custom color palettes with minimal effort! it's as easy as plugging a few colors and then typing, for example, "green link" (insert zelda joke here)

besides just web dev, some graphic design went into the site as well – namely these two icons for my journal (left) and portfolio (right). i'm particularly proud of the journal icon, it's easily one of my best yet!

speaking of my portfolio, you may notice it says Coming Soon, i.e. it's not done. in truth, it's been coming "soon" for about five years now, waiting for inspiration to strike... and it finally did 👀 i'm hoping to make that my next web dev project~

anyway i have a few more ideas for what to do with this links page in the future, but hey, not half bad for a 1.0 release, right? ✨

check it out and let me know what you think! https://skyso.me/tric

i've spent a ton of my creative energy lately investing into myself (links page etc) and that's cool and all but i really miss making stuff that makes others happy too

one thing i need to remind myself is that not everything needs to be a big production, like a stream or a mappack – sometimes just a single level or blog post will do the trick. and while they may not seem as grand or important, people still find enjoyment and insight in them!

like, those three months from dec 2019 to feb 2020 where i was pumping out blog posts and mario maker levels? that was kickass! i wanna go back to that level of productivity... but not the extrinsic stressors that led to it.

not to say that the pandemic killed my momentum, but i can definitely see the throughline that led me to focus more of my creative energy on myself. in fairness, i needed that (and still do!). in practice, i like getting more engaging feedback than "oh that's neat"

i still get nice comments on my old streams, levels, blogposts – i want to both share the love and remind myself of what i'm capable of. my recent projects have really only benefited me, but if i put in the work then i want everyone to benefit!

in some ways i feel like this desire conflicts with my new years resolution of "Oh God I Am In Desperate Need Of Rest And Healing" but restoring my creative energy *is* healing. and as long as i remind myself that not everything needs to be a Project, it should still be restful.

Rivers finds a little friend 🦋

this is an admittedly trivial thing but i think i might finally break the intimidation factor of posting on my blog if i start referring to it as my "journal" instead

i don't know where i picked this up (and i'm only just realizing it) but sometime in the past few years my blog became like this sacred cornerstone of my online presence where i have to put my best foot forward and show off my finest finished works and, uh, No?

meanwhile a journal is messy and scattered, full of finished and unfinished ideas alike, that shows far more personality and insight than just The Big Stuff

plus i have a lot of personal attachment to carrying a journal around as a kid and excitedly showing off the pages

so yeah! i'm gonna do that now ✨