Passing Is Not An Obligation Btw And Whether Or Not Youre Passing As Cis Does Not Make You More Or Less

Passing is not an obligation btw and whether or not you’re passing as cis does not make you more or less trans. If you’re not interested in passing, you’re valid and great. If you’re not able to pass currently but plan to, you’re valid and great. If you’re not able to pass at all because of whatever reason and you won’t be able in the future, you’re valid and great. You aren’t doing “too little”, you aren’t “not trying hard enough”. There’s no getting A+ in being trans. You’re fine, you’re great, you’re valid.

It's the fabled turtle metaphor :0

I like it

Trying to figure out if you’re ace or aro can be so goddamn hard because it’s like, trying to find the absence of something. Imagine you’re at a pond and you want to know if there are any turtles, or fish. Say you find a turtle and you’re like “great! Now I know there are turtles.” Or a fish, now you know for sure there are fish. Or you find both, and now you know for a fact there are both turtles and fish in the pond.

But like, if you don’t find any turtles it might be that there are no turtles or maybe you’re just really shitty at looking for turtles and maybe you THINK you saw a turtle over there or maybe it was just a stick. Maybe there are only a few turtles. Maybe you need to do something special to find the turtles. Maybe a bunch of these rocks are actually turtles but you couldn’t tell them apart. Maybe there are no turtles. You have no idea. Meanwhile some people are saying “Oh there have to be turtles! You’ll find them eventually ;)” or “How many turtles have you found in your pond?” or “Try planting some vegetables at the shore to attract the turtles.” Or “Oh no! What disaster happened to your pond that there are no turtles?” And you’re just standing there wet with an empty net and a tired expression.

But whatever because whether there are turtles or fish or not your pond’s ecology works just fine without them because that’s what eco-communities do they form a system around what they have. You aren’t missing anything if you don’t have turtles you just have a pond system without turtles. If someone tried to change you by pouring a bunch of turtles into your pond it would probably fuck something up.

So you don’t have to be entirely sure. You don’t have to search every inch of the damn pond before you can decide there are probably no turtles. If you want to take the aro or ace label because you think it fits go for it. And if you do find your turtles you can rename the pond. That’s fine.

There are plenty of posts that go around focused on hating t*rfs/exclusionists. I wanted to make a post that is about love.

I love you, gay people. I love you, lesbians. I love you, bisexuals. I love you, pansexuals. I love you, asexuals. I love you, aromantics. I love you, people on either or both of those spectrums. I love you, polyamorous people. I love you, queer people.

I love you, transgender people. I love you, transfemmes and transmascs and transneutrals and trans-something elses. I love you, nonbinary people. I love you, genderfluid people. I love you, genderqueer people. I love you, two-spirit people. I love you, intersex people. I love you, people who can’t or don’t want to medically transition. I love you, people who are cis and unapologetically fuck with gender.

I love you, people who are out. I love you, people who are in the closet. I love you, people who are both in different circumstances. I love you, people who are only out about parts of their identity. I love you, people who feel the need to simplify their identity down to something people understand better.

I love you, people who are still figuring it out. I love you, people who are actively putting off figuring it out because you are not in a safe environment to explore that. I love you, people who have changed labels multiple times. I love you, people who have experimented with your gender or sexuality and found it wasn’t for you, but you have a better understanding of yourself from it.

I love you, cishet allies who are actively fighting for our rights, whether it’s on behalf of people you love or because it’s the right thing to do. I love you, supportive cishet parents, partners, and friends.

I love you.

(If you disagree with any of these statements, I kindly ask that you do not reblog this. Thank you.)

God I'm so fuckin tired of trying to find new xenogender servers to join and almost all of them are anti mspec lesbian/gay, anti endo, or both. Like Jesus Fuckin Christ, dude.

Anyway, if you're xenic and are an mspec les/gay or endo system (or supportive of mspec les/gays AND endo systems), please feel free to join our server. Yeah I got ya, this is an ad/hj

⚠️new plan for joining, DM me for a link to the server, as I am too bad at keeping up with replacing the link here⚠️

Also we're age regressor friendly.

Exclusionists, please respect that this is a safe space, so keep your opinions to yourself and leave us alone. Thanks. <3

Plain text: Exclusionists, please respect that this is a safe space, so keep your opinions to yourself and leave us alone. Thanks. <3

Oh, and any contradictory label havers/supporters are allowed. This includes, but isn't limited to, lesboys and gaybians. Hope to see you there!

Edit: so we've had a few people join and then leave — not that that's an issue! — so I feel the need to explain how to get verified if that has been or is a problem for anyone. You go to the channel labeled 'rules-verification' and fill out the form by interacting with it. Once the form is accepted by a mod, you'll be verified. Please note that you have to have an account (It can be on any platform, not just tumblr) that we can look at to ensure that you're chill (as in, not an exclusionist): this is a security measure to help keep this space troll free. Thank you.

Another edit: heads up, our mod team gets inactive at times, meaning the verification process can get rather slow. Additionally, if you're likely to just up and leave, maybe don't join the server; I don't mean to vague anybody, but we've had people do that and it causes me slight to moderate stress when people just… leave.

"No Pride for some of us without liberation for all of us." -Marsha P. Johnson