The Distance Between Them Is Excruciating Every Touch, Every Shared Glance, Is Temptation Enough To Forget

the distance between them is excruciating — every touch, every shared glance, is temptation enough to forget all about his vow to leave their bond in her hands. her whisper is an invitation, providing the exact amount of bravery he needs, along with the alcohol, to finally throw caution to the wind & satiate the relentless longing. he tells himself that to have her just once, even if it's written off later as a drunken mistake, is all he needs. his eyes are locked onto hers, darkening with uncompromising will. lips part to speak, however she's already beating him to it, bringing him back down to earth.

he leans back, spine instantly straightening against the back of his chair, eyes flickering to the dart board behind her, adjusting to the sudden shift. he ignores how much it stings, & is reminded of their harsh reality: this is what she needs, after everything she's been through, a friend. nothing more. he scoffs, as he finishes off his drink, a smile slow to appear onto his lips, not quite meeting his eyes. brows raise, adjusting the collar of his shirt — unimpressed with her challenge. " what i heard from that, was that you want to get your ass kicked in darts. "

for a moment, i thought i may have forgotten how to breathe -- realizing that if he were to lean in and take advantage of the dim faelights and close proximity to brush his lips against mine, i would have let him. shame wracks through me at the thought, but not enough to discourage it entirely. it was too easy to imagine knotting my hands in his hair, before ripping through the remaining buttons of his shirt -- my teeth grazing against the veins of his throat, as i peppered kisses along his jawline . . . i told myself it was purely primal, carnal desire that would subside soon -- rumbling, but fleeting temptation only derived from a decrepit sense of loneliness, that was simply heightened by liquid courage.

i bit my lip as he spoke, the soft purr of his voice sending a shutter down my spine -- his confession clamoring at a part of my soul in a way i still didn't understand. the way i could feel his pain and self-loathing permeate throughout my body as if it were my own. my hand pulled away slowly, tracing the sharp point of his ear. " maybe it's not about what we deserve, " i whispered, almost forgetting that anyone else was in the tavern with us, as we held each other's gaze a moment too long. the heat and sincerity burning in his stare, threatened to dissolve me -- i had no choice but to look away so i could regain my composure. glancing over my shoulder, desperate for any sudden distraction, " i bet i could beat you in a game of darts. "

" talk, without wanting something? hm. perhaps you have changed in my absence. " rhysand chuckles, distracting himself with the sleeve of his jacket. family dinners had become daunting, somehow overwhelming since his return. the idea of getting home to velaris, to them ... it's what kept him going, all of those years. & yet, every moment he spends with them feels fleeting, now. as if he's expecting to lose them again. " you know as well as i do, they've already started without us. " a beat, before a bottle of amber, along with two glasses, appears onto the coffee table. he flashes an innocent smile, head tilting. " i suggest we at least try to catch up with them, before we grace them with our presence. "

he's relaxing a bit already, and mor finds herself softening her smile in return. she doesn't need to be anyone other than who she is around rhysand, just as he doesn't need to be anyone he isn't around her; it's been this way for as long as she can remember. ❝ you think that's the only reason i'm here? maybe i just want to talk you, rhys. ❞ though rita's is definitely one reason she's come to visit, but best not to admit that just yet. ❝ why don't we start with dinner? you look like you haven't been eating much lately, and i can't recall the last time i saw you eat with my own eyes. ❞ mor pauses, but only for a few seconds before going on. ❝ cass and az are both already in the dining room. they're just waiting for us to join them. ❞ dinner as a family is something they've only shared a few times since rhys had come back from under the mountain, and it's something mor craves now given how long they'd been apart.

rhysand steps out from the shadows, the wicked mask of viper slipping to reveal something more vulnerable, more tired. the prince of darkness, cruel & cunning, stripped down to just this: a prisoner, finding solace only in these moments. feyre's cell was the only place he could let this facade slip, even for just a moment. even if she looked at him with such hatred, sees him only as the monster he's become so good at playing, it was a welcomed break from the torment of their captor ... the insults hurled at him from the others trapped, plaguing his every thought. her whore. that is all he will be in this story, all he will be remembered for — but the sacrifice, his family's safety, velaris still untouched. it's worth it.

" isn't that sweet? " the loneliness flashing in his eyes comes & dies out just as quick, hand running through his hair as he leans against her cell wall. to love someone so much, that you would willingly put yourself through this torment. if only she knew they weren't so different. " i have no question of your heart. " she's proved herself enough. but he puts himself in tamlin's position more often than he'd care to admit, what it'd be like to feel such love ... how he wouldn't be able to just sit there & watch, without a single word. not lifting a single finger to put an end to this. he would never be in his position to begin with. he put himself here to avoid his family going through what she is.

he waves off the criticism of the high lord that dares to slip past his tongue — whatever hope she has in him has to stay intact for her next trial, he's said enough. " your human heart is what's keeping you alive. " even if tamlin is undeserving of it.

@rhysie said: “You really do love him, don’t you?”

“ of course, ” it’s stated simple and clear, presented as the obvious fact that it was. there was nothing in the world in which i was more certain. i only wished i had realized it sooner. i should have told tamlin well before he sent me back home. if i could have gone back in time i would have screamed it from the rooftop, begged him to let me stay and help him break the curse. together we could have saved his court and neither of us would be trapped down here. it was my pride and arrogance that had secured our fate — my reluctance to admit the truth getting the best of me until it was too late. the intensity of our love was now all i had left to hold on to — to remind myself why i was here and what i was fighting for. i held onto it desperately, a single lifeline. “ i wouldn’t be here if i didn’t. ”

“ why does that surprise you? you can’t really believe the lies she spews about human hearts. ” i studied rhysand’s features — my brow knitting as i contemplated the veracity of his question. his tone lacked the typical flippancy that defined his usual regard, instead replaced with a fervor i couldn’t quite place. could it be jealousy? no. it felt deeper than that — something dangerously close to bitter loneliness even. and for once, against my better judgment, i almost felt sorry for him, knowing he was as much of a prisoner as i was. cursed to a fate even crueler than mine. amarantha’s whore. no one had ever come to save him. even if i died in this desolate hell, at least i knew that for a moment i had been loved.

i was meaningless. her thoughts echo over the bond tying them together, loud enough that his lips part to object, to bring her any sort of comfort — to ensure feyre of what tamlin hasn't. that he'd do whatever it takes, give his own life, to make sure she leaves this mountain alive. he decided it as soon as she showed up: the human girl who has kept him going, without even knowing it. it was now his turn to repay the favor. but the risk of amarantha catching even an inkling of how important she is to him … it’s enough to kill his urge. he’s already risking too much with these visits, as is.

but that softness lingers in his features, that mask becoming harder & harder to wear around her. everything he has gone through, every awful command he has followed, the faces of everyone he’s had to kill. it all flashes before him, with enough detail to make him flinch. after all of these wasted years, he was barely surviving. his will to live had been shattered, any hope of seeing his family again lost, until he started dreaming. visions of quiet peace suddenly flooded his mind, then: beautiful paintings, soft hands, sunlight beaming through trees onto the forrest floor. to know of such an existence out there, that wasn’t plagued by all of this darkness, pulled him through. gave him some semblance of hope that had been lost long ago. how cruel the cauldron must be … to show him all of that, just to make him watch as all of that light is killed. to make it worse, she doesn’t even know. how he’s survived — it’s all thanks to her human heart, too.

rhysand shrugs, that sadness traded for a cold exterior, as if he suddenly remembers the part he must play again. even if she knew, would she be happy to hear it? that she helped such a monster continue on … the disgust in her gaze, every time she so much as looks at him speaks enough. & suddenly, all of that sly charisma is turned back on, forcing a smirk that’s unable to meet his eyes, finally allowing himself to glance at her. “ i’m more adaptable to the darkness than most, feyre darling. “

my final trial was fast approaching — just a couple more nights and it would all be over. certain death awaited. i knew amarantha would never let me out of here alive, but i would still do everything i could to ensure that tamlin and the others had a fighting chance. my life had been forfeit the moment i went under the mountain. all we would have left were a few decades — an otherwise, insignificant amount of time in a immortal high lord’s powerful existence. i was meaningless. they would all forget about me as soon as i was gone. my human heart was failing.

my nights had blurred into days, as i accepted my looming fate. somehow rhysand had become my most frequent companion — the most pitiful part of myself was almost grateful for it. even if that meant being subjected to his depravity and condescension, it was still somewhat better than being left to waste away on the cold floor with nothing but my doom and despair. rather it was simple boredom or a ploy to get under tamlin’s skin that brought him here, i no longer had it in me to care. i ignored his attempt to place any doubt in my mind — i knew not to question tamlin’s heart. i knew that even in his silence and stoicism, he was protecting me in his own way — even if that lack of acknowledgment was killing me just as slowly.

i didn’t move from my spot on the ground, leaning against my knees to relieve my aching back. i’m sure i looked as pathetic as i felt, crouched in the corner surrounded by filth. i blinked up at rhysand — it’s perhaps the nicest thing he’s ever said to me, that anyone had for months. i did not understand this side of him — such a far cry from the high lord who had almost crushed my mind with a flick of his fingers, or the one who sauntered through the throne room with his head held high. there was the slightest hint of defeat that hung from his shoulders now, just as it did mine. perhaps, because i was so tired of fighting, and of being alone, i found myself asking, " how have you survived for so long down here then? "

send  an emoji  for  a  starter  based  on  the  trope.

tw:  dark  themes  present  ( blood,  death  etc )

“  my  muse  ”  is  the  muse  of  person  receiving  the  meme.  “  your  muse  ”  is  the  muse  of  the  person  sending  the  meme.

🛏️  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  have  to  share  one  bed.

💍  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  are  enemies  forced  to  marry.

⚔️  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  are  fighting  and  my  muse  admits  their  feelings  for  yours.  (  add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  admit  their  feelings )

😴  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  is  comforting  your  muse  after  a  nightmare.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  comfort  mine )

🤕  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  is  patching  up  your  muse’s  injuries.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  be  patching  up  my  muse’s  injuries. )

🥂  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  drunkenly  confesses  their  true  feelings  about  your  muse  to  them.

💭  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  chooses  to  give  up  their  memories  of  your  muse  to  save  them.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  give  up  their  memories  to  save  mine )

🥊  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  pins  yours  whilst  sparring.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  pin  mine )

🛡️  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  protects  yours  from  a  fight.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  protect  mine. )

🩸  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  is  injured  and  yours  demands  to  know  who  hurt  them.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  be  injured )

💋  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  have  to  kiss  to  maintain  their  cover.

🧑‍🤝‍🧑 -  a  starter  where  our  muses  are  fake  dating.

🤐  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  have  to  pretend  they’re  not  dating.

🤯  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  recognises  yours  from  a  past  life,  but  your  muse  does  not  remember  them.

☠️  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  admits  their  true  feelings  for  your  muse  after  believing  they’re  about  to  die,  but  they  survive.  (  add + reverse  for  your  muse  to  admit  their  feelings  to  mine )

🔪  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  kills  to  protect  your  muse.  ( add + reverse  for  your  muse  to  kill  to  protect  mine )

💔  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  breaks  your  muse’s  heart  to  save  them.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  break  my  muse’s  heart )

🌪️  -  a  starter  where  our  muses  are  trapped  together  during  a  storm.

💰  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  has  to  seduce  yours  for  information.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  try  to  seduce  mine )

✋   -  a  starter  where  my  muse  traces  your  muse’s  scars.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  trace  my  muse’s  scars )

🫂  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  runs  to  embrace  yours  after  winning  a  battle.  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  embrace  mine )

👗  -  a  starter  where  my  muse  helps  yours  get  ready  for  a  fancy  event  [ eg.  fixing  their  tie,  zipping  their  dress ]  ( add  + reverse  for  your  muse  to  help  mine  get  ready )

@volchtsa : ‘ sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt, you just looked sad. ’ — amren

sad seems to be an understatement, with the high lord being multiple drinks in — alone, surrounded by a mist of shadows, eyes burning a hole into the paperwork that was neglected hours ago. it's become a nightly routine since returning from under the mountain, wrapping up his days of hunting rogue illyrian war bands with anything to take the edge off. they were gruesome confrontations over the fifty years they'd decided to push boundaries, that ended with blood being spilled more often than not. a waste of life, especially when they'd need as many bodies as they could round up for the festering war. what he'd thought would be a decent enough distraction from the upcoming wedding, ended up only adding onto his stress.

her words pull him from his thoughts, gesturing to the chair in front of his desk. after so many years, isolating himself to deal with his problems on his own had become second nature — but in moments like this, he is reminded of what it is to have a friend again. his family. he straightens, waving a hand. " no need to apologize. don't tell me you've gone soft in my absence. " a glass appears before them, a gift from the house for amren, filled with blood. " i was just lost in thought, i suppose. "