Domestic Life Of A Living With A Runaway Assassin. [Intro.]

Domestic Life Of a Living With a Runaway Assassin. [Intro.]

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x soulmate!reader

Summary: you hate many things in life. you hate soulmates. you hate the avengers. you hate guns. you hate loud snorers and complicated relationships.

Bucky Barnes is associated with all of those things, yet you can't find yourself hating him

W.c: 2.1K

Series playlist linked here

Author note: this was actually one of my first long form fics I wrote in many years, its carrys a nostalgic feeling and means a lot to me. i wrote it like last October and thought abt kinda rewriting some stuff and posting it here! I thought some of you guys woudk enjoy this story. this is only a short darbble that teases the story, next chapter shows how they met and everything after that. It takes place right after CA:TWS and it’s a soulmate AU!

Masterlist

Soulmates.

The legend goes that when the universe was created and whatever higher power you believed in created humans to have two sets of legs, two sets of arms, and two heads. Now because the world is cruel and no one can have nice things, whoever is in charge up there split us up into two beings but forever being connected by our souls. Spending the rest of our life waiting and searching for our other halves. Never being our true whole selves without them. How poetically tragic.

It turned into a weird way to make money nowadays, you felt like no one really cared about the reality of soulmates now. It was made into shitty romance movies, or stupid scientific searches for your one and only soulmate that was definitely an internet scam. People literally faking soul marks towards celebrities for their one chance with them that their delusional minds make up. 

All just a desperate attempt to feel whole and loved but your one and true person. Always and forever destined to be.

What a touching story. Too bad you think it's all bullshit

No genuinely, you were supposed to believe your life's purpose was to find this one person in the entire universe that matched you, and without them, you what? you were going to be miserable for the rest of your life? The universe is a scam. You had given up on the whole mad search for your other half years ago, you didn't understand why you couldn't go out and find your own partner without having to match up those stupid words on your shoulder. 

“I'm sorry, you probably don't feel very safe with me.”

Those stupid words. You hated the idea of soulmates but you couldn't stop yourself from the hours of wondering just what the hell that was supposed to mean. You had no interest in seeking out your soulmate but you could wonder what type of person they may be. Were they really a dangerous person? Would you genuinely not feel safe with the said person when you first meet? Would you even meet them?

Questions had swirled through your head since the day you got it. Those questions had died down a little, you were getting older and most of your peers had already met their soulmates. You noticed soulmates were not just romantic, they came in friendships, some didn't work out, some came between children and parents, and some came through your fire escape at night, covered in blood and knocking down your favorite plants.

With a loud crash, your feet carried you through your new york apartment to your living room. You saw the outline of him crouched down on the floor. “I'm so sorry, I know that was your favorite plant.”

Okay, spoiler. You had found your soulmate. You weren't excited about it as the rest of the world expected, but it happened. You weren't some hypocrite that would suddenly abandoned all beliefs and fell head over heels for your soulmate once you met like one of those stupid romance movies you mention earlier, you were not some cliche. Especially not with a poor excuse of a runaway-brainwashed-assassin soulmate, at least you would try convincing yourself that.

“My god Bucky, how many times do I have to tell you to just go through the door.” you pinch the bridge of your nose as the tired old man scrambles to clean up the dirt and scattered pot beneath him. “I mean, you practically live here now.”

“I'm not using the door, someone could see me.”

You think Like that's better than having someone see you climb through the fire escape, asshole. You scoff and shake your head and begin dragging yourself to the kitchen. You had a slight quirk at the end of your lips, an amused smile, you hoped Bucky didn’t see in the dark. Maybe he did, you didn’t really have enough time to ask him the deets on the effects of the serum. 

You swing open the cabinet door and grab a trash bag and first aid kit. God only knows how bent out of shape bucky is tonight. Making your way back into your living room, Buckys still muttering under his breath about your stupid plant and “god dammit it's fucking freezing out there.”

throwing the trash back at him, he looks up at you. His eyes are beautiful. His hair is sopping wet and you were hoping to any god above that he wasn't bleeding out on your floor. You were not losing your security deposit for your reckless runaway assassin soulmate. God, that's a mouthful, you need to give him a new nickname.

 “So, what's the damage?”

“s’ nothing, I'm just cold. It started raining hard.” he looks like a wet shaking dog. Your heart aches.

You look him up and down. Noticing the water dripping from all his clothing. “I see that.”

You sigh and take a few steps toward him. Bucky eyes follow your moments precisely. He has a bit of a staring problem. You snag the hair tie off your wrist and swiftly tie his brunette wet mop of a head into a little man bun. Cute. you shake your head.

“Stay, I'll be right back.”

Bucky watches you in awe as your body ascends back into the darkness of the room and around a corner. He's uncomfortable and his socks are wet. The leather vest is wet and he feels like he's trapped in his own skin, and Bucky feels too heavy. 

Slowly, he begins to unstrap all weapons on his body and toss them to the side so you don't have to see them. You didn't like guns. He had a designated place where he hides them because god-forbid Bucky messes up your apartment aesthetic with his dozen of unsettling and quite scary weapons. Your words, not his.

Unzipping the leather top and peeling the fabric off himself was less than a nice feeling, it made him cringe and sent a quick shiver down his spine. Bucky tossed it to the side, he’ll deal with that tomorrow. His hands feel the thin black shirt that's left, it's wet too. Fucking hell. He doesn’t remember the New York weather being this bad in September, he also barely remembers anything so his memory isn’t too reliable. Bucky slowly peels the fabric over his head, he hopes he doesn't mess up the bun you did, he never did it right.

Bucky hears your feet pad against your floor. He pushes back a smile. You're holding a towel and some clothes. He watches you as you crouch down next to him on the floor, he notices that your eyes are squinted and your bed head is apparent. A twinge of guilt hits him now knowing he had woken you up. Bucky whispers, “I woke you up.”

You sigh, again. “I was having a bad dream anyways.”

“About?”

You inhale, scoffing to yourself. “I was being chased by Jimmy Fallon with a jar of pickles – because you know, I hate pickles – and he was yelling at me about the importance of eating vegetables, but he sounded just like my mom.”

Bucky didn’t remember who Jimmy Fallon was, “you must think you’re so amusing, don’t you?”

“Maybe.”

Bucky curls his toes and is unfortunately reminded of his very wet socks. He leans forward to untie his hefty boots. Your eyes trail along his naked back, his muscles flex and suddenly you are just a little more awake. You watch his left arm in all its glory, taking note of the ragged and scarred tissues where metal meets skin. Scratch marks are littered around the edges, and you feel sad for him, imagining how those got there. The moonlight highlights his metal arm, making it shine and look quite beautiful. You could never tell Bucky that.

“It's been a week.” you finally breathe out. Bucky freezes in place as his fingers wrap around his laces. He feels guilty again. “And you didn't leave a note this time either. I thought...”

Trailing off, you stop yourself before you say something you were going to regret. Your mind wanders, you felt so incredibly stupid right now. Truth is, you didn't agree with the whole soulmate ordeal but it seemed like ever since your unconventional first meeting with Bucky, he has stuck to you like glue. He just kept coming back and then leaving again. 

It took you many of his overnight stays and weirdly domestic mornings making scrambled eggs together and then turning into a worry machine after he leaves. You realized had grown to care for him deeply. Bucky always came back, but you were scared for the day we might not. 

Bucky is– literally, a lost puppy. He had been on the run and actively avoiding the few stray agents that knew he was still alive when he met you. 

Bucky remembered back when he was a kid, dreaming about the day he would meet his soulmate. He and Steve would stay up all night talking about their soul marks, or just words (as they used to call it), and what they thought their soulmates would be like. Bucky was obsessed and simply put, a hopeless romantic. 

Then Steve met his soulmate, Peggy. And then he technically died and Hydra happened, Bucky thought his soulmate would have been dead because he was out of his time now. After being brainwashed and having been broken and put back together by Hydra, Bucky could still never shake the feeling of you still being out there, it was like some instinctive feeling in his bones, he had hope and it was one of the only things keeping him going. 

And he was right.

Bucky had many doubts when he first met you, given his situation. But you were not scared. And that was enough for him at the time.

But now he just feels guilty for giving you the burden of being his soulmate. He was trying, really.

“I'm sorry, doll.” his voice didn't sound like his own, he shrugged the rest of his boot off and followed with his socks. Finally. “I should have left a note. I'm safe, you're safe, and I'm here now.” 

Bucky heard you sniffled and you turned your head with an embarrassment look and glossy eyes. Like you were ashamed for caring.

“sweetheart...” he scooted closer, hoping you wouldn't mind his damp skin on yours. Bucky reached for you, wrapping his flesh hand around yours and giving you a small squeeze. Your head turned to him, a small smile hidden on your face by the darkness of the room. He saw it. Bucky might even think you're an angel. “I won't leave without saying something next time, I'm sorry.”

“Do I even want to know what you were doing out there?”

He hated lying to you but his life was complicated. “Just trying to fix some things I did.”

You nod. “Good.”

The silence between the two of you isn't uncomfortable, the past few months have been silent– at least with bucky. He is your soulmate. He is also the winter soldier, and the winter soldier is always moving and hiding. Bucky Barnes is always moving, always. He had been that way even way back in the Howling Commandos. 

You were his safe haven. Your relationship was on and off but your bond was strong, it was wordless and tentative and strung together by patching wounds at midnight and soft, domestic glances over coffee. Your house– just you were his place where he could just stop, pretend as if nothing mattered and sit on the couch and watch reality television that you loved. Bucky found it questionable but you said “it will help you get with the times.” Bucky just watched it because he knew it made you happy. 

Bucky Barnes had been moving all week, fast. He had almost died, twice. He was never going to let you know that though. Bucky was due for some Hell's Kitchen or dance moms. He was also not going to tell you that. 

The moonlight was fading and you could hear the faint sound of birds chirping outside, barely silenced by the bustling city life of people leaving for work. You are still sitting next to Bucky, and you nudge him with your elbow. His attention is now drawn to you. You bite your bottom lip, a horrible habit you had, bucky hated it. Bucky brings his thumb up to your face and pulls your lip away from your teeth. He wants to kiss you.

“Go take a shower, you stink.” That works too. He smiles and you laugh. Yeah, Bucky thinks he can stop for just a little longer this time.

-

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Tag list : @ivywasmaroon @ozwriterchick @slytherinambitious @wintermischief

MY PERSON OUR LUNCHBOX 😩😤😱🤥😍

☆ OUR LUNCHBOX

pairing: seungkwan x f!reader

genre: fluff, friends to lovers, highschool!au

wc: 2k

warnings: i tried to be as inclusive as possible (physically) but i realized after that yn blushes :( I'll try my best to find an alternative for that!

a/n: HAPPY BDAY EJUUUU @yeokill !! i love you lots and i’m so happy i get to celebrate ur bday with uuuu <3 ur finally 15 ahhhh my sweet sweet éjoopoo *teary eyes* they all grow up so quickly 🤧 alala i’m very proud of you and i hope you have a good day! u got this and don’t worry too much, u know we all have ur back and love u much 🫶🫶

back to masterlist !

you’ve known seungkwan for years, since the last year of middle school and frankly, you’ve never been lucky enough to be in the same class as him. each year you would see all your friends be put in the same class as his but never you. over time you learned to deal with it, but secretly you still hold a grudge against the school.

in your last year of highschool, luck finally waltzed over to your side, making you and seungkwan share a class. it was only one class and it was math, but at that point, you weren’t going to complain.

besides the very few classes you shared with him per week, you would still see each other in group hangouts, directly greeting each other when arriving at the place of rendez-vous.

but exam season has arrived and that means one thing, no group hangouts anymore for the time being.

you had a hard time going from almost daily group hangouts to weekly group hangouts to monthly group hangouts, all your friends busy studying at home or at the library in their free time.

but you simply couldn’t lock yourself up in a room and study all day, you need fresh air and other people around! so because of the lack of group hangouts, seungkwan proposed something; weekly hangouts for the two of you, one on one.

so every thursday after math class, the one class you share, you two meet up at your favorite table bench near the cherry blossom trees and behind the science building, away from prying eyes.

you often share snacks then, greedy hands picking another grape out of your my melody lunchbox seungkwan gave you for your middle school graduation, or gossip, sharing the latest secrets and news about your peers or acquaintance and giggling loudly about your teacher’s third husband or your classmate jongsu’s obvious crush on his deskmate, mikyung.

it’s always a nice moment, spending time with seungkwan– one you cherish, and you always look forward to it, passing little paper notes to each other in math class in excitement, pens scattered over your joint desks.

there was not one time you recall where you weren’t happy to spend time with seungkwan, where you didn’t have a big smile on your face, where you didn’t joyfully run over to the table bench and take the spot in the sun, always claiming it was your favorite spot but really letting seungkwan sit in his favorite spot right under the cherry blossom trees.

so when you two walk over to the table bench and you don’t run towards it and you don’t call out his name as you throw your bag on the wooden table, seungkwan gets a bit confused, eyebrows furrowing as he watches you slowly and quietly take a seat on the other bench, the one in the shadow.

he doesn’t really know what’s wrong and he’s scared to bring it up, scared that he’s going to look dumb for asking. because then you would find out he notices your little routine and maybe you would find it suspicious, and maybe you would finally realize that the glint in his eyes when he looks at you isn’t malicious but full of love.

seungkwan knows he’s staring so he looks away, eyes lingering on the way your fingers play with the elastic pink band from your lunchbox. it’s pretty quiet for your usual afternoon hangout, but to his surprise, seungkwan doesn’t find it that unpleasant.

if he didn’t know you weren’t your usual self, the silence would have probably been very comforting.

“so, did you hear what happened to jieun? i heard she tried to steal the test papers for english class.” seungkwan’s voice is soft as he speaks, eyes slowly peeking at your face.

you smile a bit, taking off the elastic band around your lunchbox and seungkwan chuckles, nodding as you glance up at him.

he continues, “apparently she didn’t show up for tutoring like she usually does because she was out with a boy from another highschool..”

your eyes widen a bit in curiosity and he knows you’re starting to become more like yourself again, more like the yn he knows. “-so she stole the papers because she didn’t study?”

the boy grins, “tried. she got caught by the gym teacher when he came by our class during lunch break.” seungkwan shakes his head at the information, a chuckle leaving his mouth. “i knew there was something going on between the gym teach’ and english teach’, he’s always hanging around her class and she even steps out sometimes to talk to him.”

at this point, you’re full on smiling, biting on the straw of your favorite cardboard juice box. “wow, i didn’t think jieun would ever even miss a tutoring session– she always said she could never take her eyes off the hottie who tutors english.”

seungkwan blinks, throat running dry. he snatches a slice of apple out of the lunchbox, eyes following your every movement as you fiddle with the strap of your bag.

“you think the guy is hot? how old is he even, 35?”

seungkwan sounds way more jealous than he wished he would but luckily, you don’t pick up on his bitter tone, arm stretching out towards him as you offer him another apple slice. the boy takes it eagerly, a blush creeping up on his cheeks as you continue to behave oblivious to his obvious attraction to you.

you tilt your head back, body leaning backwards as your hands keep a tight grip on the edge of the table. seungkwan gulps, he can see the wind blowing through your hair, sending you shivers.

“mmmh, not sure. he was cute before, but then he cut his hair.”

your tone is one he could describe as unbothered, and he’s glad that you don’t sound regretful or upset.

“yeah i’ve heard about the hair thing you girls talk about.” he starts off, genuinely curious about the whole ordeal. “i didn’t know a bad haircut could change your opinion on someone so quickly.”

for the first time since you two left math class that day, you lock eyes and you smile at him. a beautiful smile that makes his heart flutter and his cheeks heat up, ears reddening.

“you don’t have to worry about something like that, ‘kwannie. nothing could ever change the way i feel about you.”

his heart skips a beat, eating up every word that falls from your lips.

you don’t seem to notice how serious what you just said is. how important it is to him. how much it made his love for you grow. and if you did, then you’re really good at hiding your true intentions.

he doesn’t really know what to say, shuffling in his seat on the bench. suddenly, his favorite spot now feels like it’s closing down on him, nonexistent walls trapping you both inside a bubble until you’re inches apart and the tension breaks.

it’s again silent for a little while, the wind being the only one disrupting it. promptly, he starts to look around again, finding comfort in the most mundane things. he finds himself staring at a bird on a branch of one of the cherry blossom trees surrounding you. the bird hops towards the end of the branch before flying to another one, chirping and hopping again. out of nowhere, a second bird arrives and flies over to sit next to the first one, chirping too.

it makes him smile a bit.

seungkwan doesn’t know how much time passes until he decides to finally break the silence. he also doesn’t know what to say, so he opts for the safest option– something that’s normal during your weekly hangout; gossip.

“so, do you have an update about the prank those three freshmans are trying to pull on your chem teacher– what’s her name again, miss jung?”

you hum but shake your head. “no, they are still working on it. apparently, one of them got scammed while buying the bugs online.. tsk, i don’t think they will be able to pull it off before summer break.” you audibly sigh, biting one last time on the straw of your drink before placing the now empty juice box on the table.

with the way you frantically look around, seungkwan knows there’s something you’re not telling him, so he keeps quiet and waits.

“but, i heard something else. something interesting.”

seungkwan almost immediately gives you his full attention. normally, when gossiping with him, you would always blurt out the information or tease him about the new things that you heard. but never before had you done this, avoiding the subject until it was impossible to run away from it. was what you had found out really that bad?

the wind picks up a bit and he leans forward, arms crossed on the wooden table as cherry blossom petals slowly succumb to the sudden breeze, landing on the fresh ground and creating a realm of light pink clouds.

“moonbin told me something he wasn’t supposed to.”

his breath hitches in his throat. his body stills. his palms begin to sweat. seungkwan just watches you from across the table, a surprised but worried expression on his face. his hair flies with the wind and suddenly, he’s cold, even with his uniform jacket on.

he doesn’t notice it at first, too busy panicking internally, but then he sees it, the light red hues appearing on your cheeks. as if roses bloomed beneath your soft skin. it’s only visible for a fleeting second but he noticed, mind going blank. it wouldn’t be…

seungkwan doesn’t know where the sudden confidence even comes from but he finds himself looking you right in the eye and asking, “what did moonbin tell you?”

now there’s no going back, for the both of you.

you fiddle with your fingers, the words almost not being able to leave your mouth. “he told me that we always talk about other people’s crushes when instead, we should talk about our own.”

he knows that it was probably an accident, a moment in class where moonbin didn’t think twice before blabbering, but it doesn’t make him feel any better. “what else did he tell you?”

“he told me you had a crush, and that i know her.”

you don’t look at him anymore and the air feels almost suffocating. you could slice the tension between you two with a knife.

“you do know her. quite a lot actually.”

the knife took its aim, slicing through the thick cloud of tension.

you smile, heart eyes evident. “well, then you should know that i have a crush on someone too, and that you know that person very well too.”

this time it’s seungkwan’s time to smile, his short hair falling elegantly around his eyes. he leans forward a bit more, elbow and palm supporting his head as he stares at you, trying to remember every part of your face.

“my person always brings grapes to school, and she always shares.”

you grin, popping a grape right in your mouth, glossy lips gaining seungkwan’s attention.

“well, my person likes apple slices, and he always steals them from me.”

a chuckle leaves seungkwan’s mouth and he beams, unable to stop himself from blushing, again and again.

you decide to tease him a bit, absolutely craving to see his love-struck smile again, even if it’s only for a second. “you’re lucky your person brings her lunchbox to school then.”

seungkwan doesn’t mind the teasing, a sweet smile adorning his face as his shoulders relax, a cherry blossom petal falling next to him.

you stretch your arm out again, one last time as the lunchbox is now empty, holding up the last apple slice for him. the boy– your friend, crush, lover, you’re not sure what to call him yet, takes the piece of fruit from you, happily munching on it while keeping his eyes on you.

“my person, our lunchbox.”

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