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Bound By Names

Bound by Names

Bound By Names

Pairing: Haku x Reader (You)

Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Subtle Romance

Word Count: ~2,500 words

Synopsis: After Chihiro is freed, you find yourself drifting away from Haku, believing that with his newfound freedom, he no longer needs you. Struggling with loneliness and exhaustion, you distance yourself, despite the bond you once shared. One night, after a rough encounter in the bathhouse, Haku finds you injured and broken, leading to a quiet, heartfelt conversation that forces both of you to confront the feelings left unsaid.

Bound By Names

The river was always quiet at night. You had known this place for as long as you could remember, the soft hum of water flowing endlessly, a comforting rhythm beneath the chaos of the spirit world. You and Haku had grown up together, both bound by the strange rules of this place, but you always had each other.

Though Haku had grown distant over the years, especially after he began working under Yubaba, you could still remember those early days, when he would sneak away from the bathhouse just to sit by the river with you. Back then, it was easier. Life was simpler. But things had changed.

You watch him now, hovering by Chihiro’s side. She’s different—human, lost, and frightened. Haku has taken it upon himself to protect her, just as he always protected you, and you can’t fault him for that. But as you stand in the shadows, watching from afar, there’s a heaviness in your chest. It’s not jealousy. It’s the realization that you’ve started to miss him—miss the way things used to be.

You shake your head, trying to dismiss the thought. It’s not fair to compare. Chihiro needs Haku. And besides, he’s always been this way. He has a way of making people feel safe, of being their anchor when the world becomes too much. You know that better than anyone. After all, you’ve been the one to patch him up when his dragon form was injured, when he returned from Yubaba’s dangerous tasks, battered but unbroken.

But lately, you’ve been feeling more alone, and that’s what hurts the most.

Bound By Names

The first time you realized something had shifted between you and Haku was after Chihiro called him by his true name.

You were there, hidden in the shadows, when Chihiro gave Haku the gift of remembering who he truly was. You saw the moment it happened—how his eyes widened in shock, how his entire being seemed to glow with the realization of his true identity.

Kohaku River.

The name echoed in your mind, and you felt your stomach drop. It wasn’t just a name—it was his freedom. You knew it before anyone else did. Haku could leave now. He could leave Yubaba’s clutches, leave this world, leave you. And once Chihiro was free, he would have no reason to stay.

The thought festered in your heart, though you never voiced it. Instead, you did what you always did. You stayed in the background, watching as Haku continued to help Chihiro, wondering if he realized what this meant for the both of you.

As the days passed, you found yourself avoiding him. It wasn’t intentional at first. You told yourself you were busy, that the bathhouse and the spirits demanded your attention. But deep down, you knew the truth. You were pulling away because you didn’t want to face what was coming.

If you distanced yourself now, maybe it wouldn’t hurt so much when he eventually left.

Bound By Names

Tonight had been particularly rough. One of the spirits you were tasked with serving was more aggressive than usual, and in the chaos, you found yourself slammed into a pillar, the sharp edge cutting deep into your side. You winced, feeling the warm trickle of blood beneath your clothes, but there was no time to stop. Not when the bathhouse was in full swing. Not when Haku was nowhere to be seen.

You managed to slip away to the riverbank once the night grew quieter, clutching your side as the pain throbbed. The wound wasn’t life-threatening, but the dull ache mixed with the exhaustion and the loneliness in your heart was becoming too much to bear.

Sitting by the river, you stared into the water, trying to steady your breathing. The night was quiet, but the emptiness inside you was louder than ever.

Bound By Names

You had hoped to disappear quietly into the night, but fate had other plans.

Haku appeared beside you, his presence as quiet and calm as always. “I’ve been looking for you,” he said softly, kneeling beside you.

You didn’t look at him, keeping your eyes on the river. “You shouldn’t have,” you replied, voice tight.

Haku’s gaze sharpened, noticing the way you clutched your side. His expression darkened as he knelt closer, pulling your hand away gently. “You’re hurt.”

You tried to pull away, but the pain made it hard. “It’s nothing,” you muttered, turning your face away from him. “You should leave.”

“Let me help you,” he said, his voice low, filled with concern as he carefully peeled back the fabric to inspect the wound. Despite your resistance, he started to patch you up with practiced hands, hands you’d once seen mending his own injuries. But now, they were focused on you.

“No.” You shook your head, your voice breaking, filled with a mix of frustration and sorrow. “Haku, you need to leave. You’re free now. You don’t need to stay here anymore.”

He continued tending to your wound, ignoring your words for a moment. When he finally spoke, his voice was steady but filled with something deeper. “Is that what you want? For me to leave?”

Tears welled in your eyes as you struggled to speak. “You deserve to go,” you whispered. “You deserve to be free, to live without worrying about anyone else… without worrying about me.”

Haku’s hands stilled, and for a long moment, the only sound between you was the river’s soft flow. “You really believe I’d leave you behind?” he asked, his voice quiet, almost hurt.

You swallowed hard, not trusting your voice, but nodded slightly. “You should.”

Bound By Names

Haku didn’t let go. Instead, he finished tending to your wound before sitting back on his heels, his gaze locked on yours. “There’s something you don’t understand,” he said quietly.

You frowned, the ache in your chest growing as you tried to meet his eyes. “What?”

“Chihiro helped me remember my name, yes,” he began, “but that’s not all I remembered.”

You blinked, confusion spreading across your face. “What do you mean?”

“I remembered more than just my own name,” Haku continued, his voice soft but firm. “I remembered your name too.”

Your breath caught in your throat, your heart pounding in confusion. “My… name?”

Haku nodded, his gaze unwavering. “When Chihiro helped me, something else came back. Something I had forgotten until now. I didn’t just regain my freedom. I remembered that I’m bound to you too.”

Your mind was spinning. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I took your name too,” he said softly. “I’ve always been tied to you. That hasn’t changed, and it never will.”

Tears blurred your vision as you processed his words, the overwhelming realization sinking in. “You… took my name?”

“Yes,” Haku said gently, his hand resting over yours, his touch warm and reassuring. “I’m not leaving you. I never planned to.”

For the first time, you let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding. The loneliness that had been suffocating you began to ease, if only a little. Haku wasn’t leaving—not without you.

“I thought…” You couldn’t finish the sentence, the words catching in your throat.

“I know,” Haku whispered, his hand squeezing yours gently. “But you don’t have to push me away. We’re in this together.”

The weight of everything that had happened—the distance, the fear of losing him, the pain of seeing him with Chihiro—began to lift, just a little. And for the first time in what felt like forever, you felt less alone.

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 Love Of My Life // Yoon Jeonghan
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 Love Of My Life // Yoon Jeonghan

It has to be at least two in the morning when Jeonghan's ringtone blares throughout his bedroom, and he rolls over with a groan, grappling blindly at his nightstand before finding his phone and pressing it against his cheek. 

“Who is this and what do you want?”

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Jeonghan rubs his eyes, before taking his phone away from his cheek and peering at the screen so he can read the time. “See, you’re not presenting a very good argument,” he says, once he’s put the phone against his ear again. It’s almost three in the morning. What are you thinking? “I don’t wanna date you that much.”

You make a sad sound on the other end of the phone. “What will it take to get you out of the house?”

“Wire me an obscene amount of money right now and I’ll think about it.”

There’s a pause.

“No. Best I can offer is a pretty please.”

Jeonghan can’t help smiling at your dry tone, and he rubs his eyes once again with a yawn. “Fine. I guess I can’t expect anything better from you, anyway.” He can almost see you biting your lip in annoyance, wanting to quip something witty back at him but also wanting to keep quiet so he’ll actually come. 

“You know me so well.”

“Yes I do,” Jeonghan teases, and groggily hauls himself out of bed. “I’ll be ready in ten. Where do you want me to go?”

“Don’t worry, princess, I’ll pick you up,” you say, suddenly sounding excited. “Just wait for me and I’ll come over to take you out.”

Jeonghan raises an eyebrow. “Is that a threat?”

You laugh, bright and happy, like it’s not four in the morning and you’ve asked your best friend to go on a date with you. Jeonghan can’t help but smile again, even as he grapples blindly through his dark room to find some clothes.

“Don’t worry. It’s a promise.”

───────────── 🌘

Jeonghan is, admittedly, more than a little confused when you just take him to the nearest playground.

Sure, maybe this entire thing is weird—you calling him up during ridiculous hours of the morning to “go on a date” is definitely not something you’ve done before—but that’s just the kind of friendship he and you have. 

It’s like how, last year, he spent an entire month calling you increasingly ridiculous pet names, ranging from “beloved” to “honey butter snuggles bunny bear”, and purposefully took you out to public cafes and restaurants to test them out for everyone to see and hear, preventing you from punching him as hard as he probably deserved. 

So this is, like, nothing new. Just a funny and silly thing the two of you do, because you've known each other for the whole of your lives, and when it comes to the way your relationship works, the lines separating “platonic” and “romantic” have always been curiously nonexistent. 

It doesn’t mean anything. It’s never meant to mean anything.

But sometimes, sometimes, it feels like it should.

“I think I’m going to end up alone forever,” you say abruptly, and Jeonghan looks over at you in surprise. You’re sitting on the swings next to him, dragging yourself back and forth as you look up at the sky. There’s nothing to see up there, with the clouds obscuring any moonlight, so it's obvious that you're just looking away so he can't see your face. 

It's so quiet; Jeonghan didn't realise that the world could be this quiet at 2 in the morning, and it makes your words echo extra loud into the abyss, before they're swallowed by the darkness. 

Jeonghan shrugs. “Maybe you will.”

Instantly, you're leaning over to swat him on the arm, and he laughs. 

“Asshole,” you say, but there's no venom in your voice, even as you level him with a glare. “You're really no help. I'm trying to unload all my deepest fears for you, here, practically begging you to reassure me, and yet all you can do is be mean.”

“You said one thing,” Jeonghan points out. “I don't think that counts as unloading all your deepest fears.”

“Yeah, well, maybe it's my only deepest fear.”

“Why are you unloading your deepest fear on me?” Jeonghan asks, kicking his legs out in front of him. “We're on a date. Our first date, mind you, so this hardly seems appropriate.”

“Asshole,” you say again, but like before, the word has no bite. You glance over at him, before realising that he's looking at you, and then quickly raise your gaze to the sky. “I'm being serious about this, you know.”

Jeonghan says nothing for a long moment. Watches the way the pale light from a nearby lamppost gives you an unearthly, almost otherworldly glow. 

“I'm being serious too,” he decides to say, looking up at the cloudy sky with you. “You shouldn't be saying that stuff on a first date. Kinda makes it sound like you don't think things will work out between us, you know?”

You huff a confused laugh, looking over at him again. “Jeonghan, wha—?”

“And maybe you will end up alone,” he carries on, thoughtfully, as if he's talking to himself, forgetting that you're sitting there too. “But maybe you won't. I think you probably won't. And even if you do, it's fine, because I'll still be with you.”

It's a painfully vulnerable thing to say, made doubly so by the quietness of the night. Like a love confession, almost. Except it's not, because he's not in love with you. 

He isn't. 

“That's really sweet,” you say, almost begrudgingly, as if it pains you to admit that Jeonghan actually said something nice, and he laughs. “Though wrong. If you’re with me, then I'm not alone, am I?”

“Oh, I see. When you said alone, you meant in general. I thought you meant, like, romantically.”

“Well, maybe. But maybe I also meant overall,” you shrug. “I didn't think you'd want to spend the rest of your life with me.”

Jeonghan swallows, tilts back on the swings, head still raised to look at the sky. “I want to spend every life with you.”

You look away from the sky at his words, turning to face him in surprise. The echoes of what he’d just said were already fading away, muffled and pressed into the velvet dark of the night, but the surprisingly soft air that followed in its wake still remained.

 Now, he's the one avoiding your gaze, keeping his eyes firmly locked on the shapeless, misty blur of clouds above him so he doesn’t have to look at you. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see you tilt your head, and smile. 

“Oh, look at you, you sap,” you say, bright and teasing. “Face it, you like being with me. Oh! I bet you're in love with me, seeing as how you agreed to date me and everything! Isn't that right, Jeonghan? You love me.”

Jeonghan pulls a face, and you burst into laughter, so ridiculously loud and happy even though it's two in the morning and the whole playground is silent, the sound of your happiness ringing against the cool air of the night. He can't help but look at you then, exasperated and fond, shaking his head as you grip the swing chains and sway back and forth, still giggling to yourself. 

He sniffs, feigning annoyance as he leans to the side, making a dramatic show of pulling his swing away from you. 

“This isn't a real date. I could never date you.” He scrunches his face in faux disgust for good measure, and you laugh again, rolling your eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. And yet you still came out when I called, didn't you?” you tease, smiling widely, and Jeonghan has to admit that you're right. He's here because you asked him to be here. He’s here for you.

Hm. This was getting weirdly soul-baringly truthful for what he’d thought would be a silly little hangout in the middle of the night.

“Next time you call me at 2am, I’m blocking you forever,” he says dryly, giving you an exaggerated look of disdain just so he can revel in the laugh that it pulls out of you.

“No you won’t,” you say cheerily. “Because you looove me.”

“Um, lies.”

“No lies. You literally love me so much.”

“I don’t.”

“You do.”

“No, I don’t.”

“You do. You do, you do, you do, you’re actually genuinely in love with me and there’s nothing you can do to deny it, because it’s so obvious that I’m literally the love of your l—”

Jeonghan makes a clicking sound with his tongue and leans over to shove your arm, causing you to swing to the side as you cackle with delight at his reaction. He glares at you, again, sighing with exasperation as you continue to laugh.

“Yes, yes, I love you, just as much as you love me. Now if we’re not actually doing anything of importance, then can I go home?”

“What?” you say indignantly. “Of course not! If I can’t sleep, then that means you’re not allowed to sleep either.”

“I knew it. You called me out here because you couldn’t fall asleep.”

“Duh. Now come and push my swing, will you?”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes and stands up from his swing, groaning and holding his knees like he’s some kind of grumpy grandpa. You laugh, mocking him for his bad joints as he walks around to stand behind you, and he snarks back something ridiculously funny and rippling with light, twisting through the cool air.

And then his hand presses against the small of your back, soft and yet sure, and suddenly all you can focus on is that gentle, feathery point of contact that connects you to him.

Your laughter subsides as he begins to gently push your swing, and you move up, and down, and up, and down, the fleeting warmth of his hand an intermittent pressure against your back. He doesn’t say a word. Everything is quiet, in your head. Like his touch alone could silence any worries that still floated around in your brain.

It’s one of the things you adore most about Jeonghan. He makes you feel safe.

“For the record, by the way,” you say, voice quiet, “I really do love you.”

There’s no noise but the metallic creak of the swing, sounding weirdly small in the yawning abyss of the dark. Jeonghan’s hand is still steady as he pushes you, again and again.

“As a friend?” he asks, eventually.

You can’t see him, and maybe that’s for the best. His voice is tinged with a colour, an emotion, that you can’t quite name, warm and cool and fleeting and present all at once.

Yet more silence greets his words. You continue swinging, and he continues helping.

It’s hard to know what he means by that. As a friend, in a hopeful way? As a friend, in a meaningful way? Or as a friend, in a way that could maybe, maybe, signal that he thinks, or wishes, that you mean... something else.

More.

These things are difficult to tell, when it comes to Jeonghan. Who wears his heart on his sleeve and yet also hides it away where no one can see.

“Yeah,” you say, after it has been far too long since he’d asked, but it’s clear that you were both waiting for your answer anyway. The word leaves you as a sigh, threadbare and thin. “As a friend.”

Jeonghan huffs a soft laugh. Maybe because he believes you, or maybe because he doesn’t. You’re not too sure.

“Okay,” he murmurs, pale as moonlight. “In which case, I love you too.”

 Love Of My Life // Yoon Jeonghan

fics tags: @jeonginssa @weird-bookworm @minhui896 @slytherinshua @haowrld @belladaises @moonlitskiiies @mirxzii @zozojella @kawennote09 @a-wandering-stay @abibliolife @doublasting @wonranghaeee @icyminghao @sweet-like-caramel @your-yxnnie @odxrilove @kyeomyun @crackedpumpkin @jeonride @kellesvt @eightlightstar @onlyyjeonghan @aaniag @starshuas @raevyng @isabellah29 @hrts4hanniehae @mcu-incorrect @dokyeomkyeom @suraandsugar @haodore @tulsa24 @melodicrabbit