I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 38

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 38

"I can't believe we're actually doing this." Jessie seethed as she walked through Tanneyhill with Rafe in tow to pack up their belongings.

"I know, Jess, but... this matters to them, so it needs to matter to us." Rafe explained with pleading eyes as he followed Jessie around aimlessly, now going into the immaculate dining room. It was still clad with the fine china, Jessie wondered if that long dark table was ever not set for a dinner party of 12.

"Since when do you care about the pogues, huh? What happened to the Rafe the pogues talked about? The Rafe that was only out for himself? The Rafe with a back bone, huh?"Jessie spat as she turned to look at Rafe.

Rafe's facial expressions shifted from one of desperation to one that was unreadable. Jessie knew that expression well. After all, she knew how to get under his skin better than anybody else.

It was clear Rafe was trying to collect himself, and he was grateful Charley and the pogues were not in the room with them, although he still had every reason to try and keep his cool. Rafe clinched his firsts, broadened his chest as he took a deep breath, and pursed his lips.

"You don't mean that." Rafe simply stated with sharp eyes. The accusation hurt of course, but Rafe was more pissed off than anything in that moment.

"No, I think I do. Because although in high school you turned into a rude, condescending, strung out coke addict who hated everyone and everything, at least you had a spine! You're seriously just going to follow the pogues around like a lost puppy? You have a business, an empire, a family and you're just gonna-" Jessie couldn't continue her rant for the impending fist she watched hurl into the wall. The memory of that fateful night played in her head, and although this time Rafe didn't punch the wall inches beside Jessie's head, the feeling was the exact same: fear and disbelief.

Rafe took his hand out of the wall, watching the drywall fall the ground and the dust fly up in the air as he took a breath. He looked back over at Jessie, who had taken a step or two back from Rafe through now labored breaths. Rafe could see the fear on her face, the same look he tried so hard to erase from his memory years ago. He wanted to apologize immediately, to beg on his knees for Jessie to forget what he just did out of anger. Instead, he continued to try and prove a point. He was done being insulted, even if it was coming from Jessie. His dad never raised him to be spineless, and that's not what this situation was, and Rafe was going to prove that.

Rafe walked over to Jessie, still trying to catch his breath. Jessie's steps backwards from him only pushed her up against the wall, Rafe happily pinning her in between himself and the sage green wallpaper. Rafe grabbed Jessie's jaw with his hands and squeezed ever so slightly to get her attention. He was waging a war in his mind, half of him absolutely gutted that he was making her so scared, yet half of him feeling like this was necessary to get the point across. The room went quiet except for their labored breaths, then finally Rafe spoke through a whisper.

"What I am doing is not weakness. What I am doing is tactical, for you, and for Charley. We have strength in numbers, and strength in allies, and without the pogues we have none of that. Yes, I have a business and we have money but all that means nothing if Rose finds me." Rafe seethed, a stray tear rolling down his cheek. "You haven't seen the Rafe I was after you left. And you better thank God you won't. This isn't the Rafe you think you want to see. I'm trying to protect us, Jessie." Rafe choked out, still balancing the perfect act of terror and trembling.

Rafe knew there was a risk in reacting the way that he did, he knew Jessie scared easily, and she could just as easily pack up her things and leave all over again, but he also trusted that she would believe him, at least he hoped so anyways. Rafe finally let go of Jessie's face and backed away from her. Jessie was still frozen in fear on the wall, however, her fear suddenly turned into a much more serious face, one of anger.

Unfortunately, Jessie understood damn well what Rafe was talking about, she just needed to hear him say it. But did he have to get so physical? Jessie was positive he didn't. She felt her fight or flight mode activate the second Rafe took his hand off of her, and she felt the all too familiar feeling of wanting to flea from the trouble, just like she had done with her dad, and just like she had done with Rafe four years ago. But Jessie thought maybe she shouldn't have laid into him like she did. That was the thing about Rafe and Jessie, they were so similar that they knew exactly how to push each other's buttons, to a point of lethal toxicity to one another if left unchecked like in a moment just like this. Their whole relationship was always a dance of both of them holding the match that could set the two of them ablaze with either love or hate. They'd be lying if they didn't say they each had abused that power a time or two in the past, and this moment was certainly no exception.

"You know what's worse than the regret of leaving?" Jessie whispered with a cold sadness behind her eyes.

Rafe just looked at Jessie with an inquisitive look, imploring her to go on. Jessie being so unpredictable in situations like these always had Rafe hanging on her every word.

"The regret of staying." Jessie answered her own question, this time with a harshness to her voice.

Rafe's face fell, as he knew exactly what she meant. Jessie took the opportunity to do what she does best and capitalize on the fact that Rafe was maimed by his emotions. Jessie slowly walked closer to Rafe, her face eventually only mere inches from his as she looked into his eyes with a fierceness he hadn't seen since she first walked into that house in the Bahamas. Much like their first reunion, Jessie was on a mission to send a message.

"Don't make me regret staying." Jessie growled. Rafe swallowed the lump in his throat and managed to nod his head showing he agreed. Words were clearly too hard for him in the moment.

Jessie was still a Maybank through and through, and she'd be damned if she let any man scare her into or out of anything. Despite Rafe's explosion, Jessie still made sure she was in control, she had to, she had a daughter wrapped up in this. But who was she kidding, she was hopelessly devoted to Rafe no matter how much he did to her, and the same could be said of Rafe. They were loyal to each other to a fault, and although they might not have been together physically for the past four years, they were still always one in their hearts. 

With nothing else needing to be said, Jessie darted her eyes towards the door and escorted herself out of the room with a noticeable strut, leaving Rafe to collect his thoughts.

Rafe wanted to make things right, his first instinct was to follow Jessie and profusely apologize, but he knew she wasn't ready for that. Jessie had a stellar fight and flight response and he knew that she was acting rather flighty right now, so he better not push it.

Jessie made her way up the stairs, taking a glance at John B, JJ, and Pope all entertaining Charley on the front lawn, at least that's what Charley thought it was. Really, the boys were clearly out there to keep watch, but somebody had to watch Charley right? They had all played around with the idea of someone staying behind at the Chat with the toddler for safety, but they all knew that would probably keep them even more compromised if they didn't stay together, so, to everyone's behest, Charley was brought back to Tanneyhill with them only for a moment long enough to grab the necessities.

As Jessie walked down the upstairs hallway towards Rafe's room, she caught Sarah in her old room out of the corner of her eye. Jessie noticed she was packing a few things of her own, what looked to be like clothes and such, but she noticed she had moved onto her small cork board over her desk, the board held many different pictures that she was taking down.

Jessie slowly tiptoed into the room, careful not to intrude or startle the blonde as she knocked on the door. Sarah's head swung around and she looked sad.

"Come in." She simply said. Jessie managed a sympathetic look.

"Whatcha lookin at?" Jessie asked, amazingly being able to hide the fact that she was still on edge from the enormous fight she just had with Sarah's brother right under her feet.

"Just some pictures..." Sarah trailed off as she handed one of the pictures over to Jessie. Jessie held in her hands a photo of Rafe and Sarah when they were 16 and 14, Rafe's arms wrapped around Sarah as she was smiling.

"How times have changed right?" Sarah chuckled.

"You have no idea." Jessie said sarcastically with a slight laugh.

A hush came between them as neither one of them could think what to say next. Finally Sarah thought of something.

"You're the only one that can fix him, Jess."

That statement made Jessie's mind race with emotions and words that she couldn't say.

"Actually, Sarah, I think I'm the one that broke him." Jessie admitted as she looked at Sarah with tears in her eyes. Sarah had never seen Jessie so vulnerable, it was a little weird to her but she played it off.

"Jessie... he was broken long before you ever came into the picture." Sarah replied barely above a whisper. The idea that Jessie carried that weight on her shoulders broke Sarah's heart, and although she knew what Jessie meant, she still didn't believe it to be totally true. "Dad put way too much pressure on him from a very early age, he was always striving and never received love because dad never thought he was good enough. I know he's told you this. You're the one that set him free from that."

"And he just exchanged one vice for another. Instead of fighting for Wards love he ended up fighting for mine, and now look where we are." Jessie said, irritated with herself as she numbly looked at the cork board in front of her.

"Jessie, nobody's blaming you for doing what you did, not even Rafe. He just needs someone to stick around... for once."

Jessie couldn't respond to that, she didn't know how. Sarah just didn't even know the half of it, and that's what Jessie had to keep repeating over and over in her head. Sarah could see she had struck a nerve and she looked down at the pictures.

"I can't imagine what you and Rafe have gone through, and the decisions you've had to make, but you know Rafe better than anyone else, and I think you're the only one that can truly tell if he's genuinely trying, you're the only one that can see he's just a work in progress."

Maybe I'm tired of projects Jessie couldn't help but think to herself. Instead, she opted to give Sarah a slight smile of understanding and nod her head. She was trying to take Sarah's words into consideration, but she couldn't help but feel responsible for Rafe's behavior in more ways than one. It was one thing to be volatile while strung out, drunk, and high... but Rafe was stone cold sober downstairs.

"I'll meet you downstairs in a few minutes, just gotta grab our stuff from Rafe's room."

Jessie made her way down the hall and to the familiar gray and navy blue room, the bed still unmade from where Charley slept the night before. The glass of water still by their bed for when the toddler got thirsty. The diamond ring still on the dresser from where Jessie had taken it off before making snacks for everyone that evening.

Jessie walked over to the bed and began to grab the stuffed animals from the middle of it. As she grabbed the covers to pull them to their rightful place she saw her husband appear in the doorway with his head hung low and a face that showed he was trying to gauge what to say or if to say anything at all. Jessie gave him a glance but quickly went back to making the bed. Rafe met her on the opposite side and began to help her fold the duvet over, eventually grabbing the king size pillows and fluffing them and laying them on the bed just how Jessie liked. Jessie didn't argue, she just let him help, and Rafe was grateful for that.

"I'm sorry." Rafe choked out, his voice already shattered from the weight of the tension in the room. Jessie took a deep breath and looked at Rafe, genuinely at a loss for words, whether that was from anger, sadness, confusion, or all of the above, neither of them knew. Jessie exhaled and walked over to the opposite side of the bed where Rafe was. Jessie stopped in front of Rafe and looked behind him, Rafe wasn't quite sure why but gave her an inquisitive look.

"I need in the closet." Jessie said shortly and with a tinge of annoyance in her voice. Rafe just quickly moved to the side, not wanting to take up anymore space and annoy Jessie. His wife made her way into the walk in closet, finding the suitcases still opened and rummaged through. She began to straighten them up as she heard Rafe speak up again behind her.

"Jessie..." Rafe sighed. "I know... what I did back there was wrong... and I..." Rafe couldn't hardly get the words out without crying. Jessie didn't dare look at him, she couldn't, she knew she would break, and now was not the time. "I- I'm trying... to get better. And with last night with my dad, and this morning you just not trusting me it was all a perfect storm... and I'm-" Rafe paused to swallow the lump in his throat to get through his next sentence without bursting into sobs. "I know it's not an excuse but I need you to understand where my head is at and I'm just.... I'm sorry. Please don't leave me again."

Again. The word stung way more than Jessie anticipated. It made Jessie wonder if he reacted this way the first time she left. Rafe didn't have to wonder, he couldn't forget what happened to him after she left if he tried.

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 28

As Jessie was getting ready to leave for the restaurant, Rafe came into the bathroom as she was brushing her hair. Rafe wrapped his arms around Jessie's waist and pulled her in close.

"Where's Charley?" Jessie asked as she looked at Rafe through the mirror.

"She's playing in her room." Rafe answered. Jessie simply nodded and went back to getting ready.

"She called me daddy this morning." Rafe said simply with a small smile on his face. Jessie stopped what she was doing once again and looked back at Rafe with a grin.

"Seriously?!" Jessie asked with wide eyes.

"Seriously." Rafe replied through a slight laugh. "She said it this morning when she woke me up wanting breakfast."

Jessie couldn't help but be filled with tears of joy. This was more confirmation that her and Charley would be just fine following Rafe back to OBX or wherever they needed to be. No matter where they went, Jessie knew she couldn't split up their family again. Jessie couldn't choke out any words, instead she opted to wrap her arms around Rafe's neck.

"I'm so glad baby, you deserve that." She whispered as she buried herself further into Rafe.

"Thank you." Was all Rafe could say as he breathed a sigh of relief. Suddenly they both heard little footsteps coming to the bathroom door.

"What we doing?" Charley asked with knitted eyebrows. She was already ready to go in her yellow sundress and high pigtails. Rafe bent down to be eye level with his daughter as Jessie went back to fixing her hair.

"We are going to find you some shoes to wear." Rafe replied as he pointed at Charley and booped her nose. She giggled and ran away to her room, clearly anxious to pick out a pair of shoes. Rafe simply followed behind her, but not before giving Jessie one last loving look.

- - -

"We ready to go?" Jessie asked as she slipped on her converse and met Rafe with Charley on his hip at the door.

"Yep." Rafe responded as they walked out the door and towards the bar downtown. Living in Manhattan everything was within walking distance, which Jessie loved. It was always a great way for Charley and her to get some fresh air and a little exercise. Plus, it saved on gas. Jessie didn't even have a car until after a year of living there, with the help of Mama and Tom getting her a job and hooked up with a friend selling one for a good price. However, she couldn't part with the small motorcycle she brought with her from OBX. That was all she had besides a few other belongings when she left. She left both her small car and motorcycle parked in the parking garage connected to their building.

The three of them had finally made it down to the small local dive bar. If Rafe would have blinked he would have missed it. He almost did, thankfully Jessie knew where it was and side stepped him just in time. Jessie had a key to the door of course but also told them she was coming and that she was bringing a friend. Considering they were stopping by before they opened she knew they wouldn't mind. They never minded having Charley there either. Many a night has been spent bartending with Mama while young Charley slept in the back room in a cot built just for her under Tom's desk.

"Hey Mama!" Jessie exclaimed enthusiastically as she let Charley down to run to her grandparents.

"Hey darlin!" Mama replied as she bent down to accept the impending bear hug from Charley. Soon after Tom rounded the corner.

"I thought I heard my favorite girls." The bearded burly man said as he came out of his office and around the counter to give Jessie a hug.

"Hey sweetheart." Tom exclaimed as he hugged Jessie and gave her a kiss on the head. Before Tom was done with the motion he eyed Rafe up and down. "Is this the guest you were talking about?" Tom asked with knitted eyebrows. At the same time Mama came walking up behind Tom with Charley in tow.

"Yes! This is Rafe. Rafe, this is Mama and PopPop. But you can call them Maci and Tom if you'd like." Jessie proclaimed as she introduced the two parties. Rafe stuck his hand out nervously with a soft smile towards Tom. Rafe couldn't belive how nervous he was. He had done billion dollar deals with gun wielding maniacs and their goons surrounding him with no nerves and yet this had him shaking.

"Nice to meet you." Rafe blurted out with his hand still extended. Tom looked down at his hand and back up at Jessie, still trying to decide if he was going to shake it or not. Tom saw the plea on Jessie's face and decided to go with it.

"Nice to meet ya Rafe." Tom said simply in his grisly tone he always has. Thankfully, Mama decided to break the very clear tension.

"Well, y'all want something to eat or drink? It's almost lunchtime!" Mama exclaimed as she made her way back behind the counter hoping everyone would follow.

"Chicken nuggets!" Charley quickly demanded as she ran alongside Mama.

"We'll just take whatever you make." Jessie answered as they sat down at the bar, Tom opted to stand alongside it beside Rafe, still unsure of the man he was looking at. For Tom, no man was good enough for Jessie. Jessie was not looking forward to telling Mama and Tom about her and Rafe's history.

"Can I get you anything to drink, baby?" Mama asked Rafe as she got Jessie started with a Moscow mule, remembering it was her all time favorite.

"Oh I'm okay, water's fine." Rafe replied, politely putting a hand up.

"What, you don't drink?" Tom asked with his eyebrows furrowed. This kid was seeming more and more peculiar to him.

"Uh... just not feeling it today, it's only lunch." Rafe joked looking at Tom for any semblance of understanding.

"Oh come on." Tom bantered as he slapped Rafe's arm with a little too much force for Jessie's liking. Thankfully, Rafe wasn't phased, his strong arms could definitely withstand the blow. "Little whiskey won't hurt ya. Put a little hair on your chest. Get him a whiskey and coke, Mama." Tom insisted. Jessie gave Rafe a look as if to silently apologize. Rafe reciprocated with a soft half smile as if to tell her it's okay. Mama gave Tom a look of disapproval but continued to make a drink for Rafe and slide it his way. Jessie tried to brush it off as best she could despite Tom's best efforts to intimidate Rafe.

"Sooooo..." Jessie began as she stretched her hands across the bar and look around bashfully. "There's a reason that I wanted to come and meet with you guys today."

"Uh oh, here we go." Tom joked as he finally took a seat at the barstool beside Rafe. Charley at that point was playing contentedly in the corner but Jessie wondered if she should redirect her to Tom's office.

"So, Rafe is actually... um... Charley's father." Jessie explained as she gripped Rafe's hand over the bar. "And we're... m-back together." Jessie didn't have the heart to tell them they were already married. She thought that would be way too much too soon. She knew eventually they'd get around to that conversation though. Mama and Tom just exchanged looks that neither Rafe nor Jessie could quite interpret. Were they angry? Confused? Surprised? Did they expect it? Probably a combination of all those things.

"This..." Tom began as he pointed at Rafe. "This is the guy you left home for? And this is the guy you had to protect from Charley?" Tom asked with a dangerous calm in his voice. Rafe couldn't let that slide.

"Hey man you don't even know me." Rafe spat as he immediately stood up from his chair and looked at Tom dead in the eyes, who had also stood up at the same moment to meet them. Despite Tom being slightly shorter, his gaze was just as fierce. Jessie didn't expect that to escalate so quickly, but she thought maybe she should have considering Rafe was never one to accept insults.

"I know enough." Tom answered with just as much vengeance in his voice. "I know that you were the reason Jessie had to leave wherever she came from. I know that you were the reason she felt she and her baby were unsafe. I know you were the reason she came here with no money and nobody to rely on." Tom continued, never breaking his death glare up towards Rafe. At this point their faces were mere inches away from each other. Rafe was trying to prove to Jessie that he had changed, but he still wasn't going to let disrespect slide.

"Yeah well that was the old me, okay?" Rafe replied. Tom just scoffed.

"You may be fooling Jessie with that but you're not fooling me alright I'll be damned if-"

"Stop it! Both of you!" Jessie interrupted, loud enough to get the point across but not loud enough to disturb Charley from across the room.

"Alright, come on now. Your daughter and your granddaughter is in the room right now." Mama spoke up as she went to grab Charley and take her to Tom's office to play with the toys they always kept in there.

"Yeah, and you're lucky she is." Tom retorted, narrowing his eyes at Rafe once more. Rafe was finding it increasingly difficult when a man was judging him so harshly without getting to know him first. Still, he had a point to prove. He remained stolid, not fuming, but he made it clear he was not afraid. Jessie decided to butt in before Rafe had a chance to say what he was really thinking.

"Tom, I promise you nobody is being more cautious about this than I am. I could never forget the reason that I came here, and I could never forget what you and Mama did for me..." Jessie trailed off as she wedged her way in between the two most important men in her life. "... but it's time for me to give Rafe another chance now that he knows about his daughter and is willing to change for us. Okay? Can you just trust me on this?" Jessie said as she looked up at Tom with hopeful eyes. Rafe had softened his look slightly and had un clinched his fist despite him still being angry deep down.

"I guess, sweetheart, whatever you want." Tom sighed as he looked at Jessie lovingly, then back up to Rafe with a hardened glare once again. "But if you step one toe out of line-"

"I'll handle it myself, like I always have, pop." Jessie interrupted with a knowing stare. Tom knew she was right, and so did Rafe. Jessie really hadn't changed that much in four years, she was still that strong, independent, snarky, know it all that was perfectly fine with taking care of herself. Rafe still appreciated that about her... that freedom she always found within herself to live life and not be afraid. Tom sighed in agreement.

"Lets eat you two!" Mama butted in, trying once again to break the tension— and the death glares— between the two men. Jessie moved from her spot back to sit at the bar, the others doing the same as Mama platted everyone's food, including Charley's, who had now re entered the room.

"So is Rafe who you were going to see last week?" Mama asked as she ate over the bar counter in front of them.

"Yeah, actually. I met him in the Bahamas to... tell him about Charley." Jessie answered. Her and Rafe both knew that was a lie, but they couldn't exactly tell the truth. How do you casually mention that you went across the world to take half of what you rightfully own as the wife of a murderer, drug addict and convicted thief of your own brother? Mama and Tom, despite how close they were to Jessie, never truly knew her history, and there was clearly a reason.

Tom put his fork down and swiveled in his chair closer to Rafe. "So what do you do for work son." Tom asked, this time a little friendlier, but not by much.

"Oh, I uh, run my dad's company. He passed away not too long ago so I'm kind of in charge of it now. Cameron Enterprises." Rafe answered, returning the same tone to Tom, friendly, but still not letting his guard down.

"Cameron? Oh! We heard about your dad a couple of weeks ago! Yeah, he was the one who..." Tom began, then realizing what he was about to say.

"Killed himself by blowing up his own boat, yeah." Rafe finished the sentence for him with a calmness in his voice that showed he was oddly un phased. To distract himself from the thought he took a sip of the whiskey and coke in front of him... well, more like a chug.

"Well, we are so sorry, honey." Mama spoke up, putting her hand on Rafe's with a sympathetic look. Jessie knew Rafe never liked pity looks, besides, he never had the best relationship with his father anyways so the loss wasn't as hard as the world may think.

"I appreciate that." Was all Rafe could muster as he pursed his lips together. He really wanted to say it was no big deal, but clearly that would raise some red flags. Instead he opted to grasp the small glass even more firmly. Jessie seemed to be the only one who noticed.

"Yeah, well, that's the main reason I needed to see Rafe. I knew his dad had just passed and as hard as it was to go back and see him, I felt it was only right that Rafe finally know what happened to me and that he had a daughter." Jessie took the moment to capitalize on her story. Truth is, as hard as it was to lie, she knew that Mama and Tom would probably never know the full story, that's just the way it goes when you're tied up with treasure hunts and ruthless tycoons like Ward Cameron.

"And I'm glad she did... she really pulled me out of the pit there." Rafe half smiled as he placed a hand on Jessie's thigh. That was the truth.

"Aw, well we're glad you two have found each other again." Mama simply stated and Tom nodded half heartedly in agreement. It was clear Tom was still fishing for information and looking for something to be wrong. Jessie didn't blame him, it was in Tom's nature just like it was in hers.

"Yeah, about that..." Jessie sighed as she grabbed Rafe's hand, she couldn't tell if it was for his support or hers. Regardless, Rafe squeezed her hand back. "I'm... well, we're... moving back home... to be with Rafe." Jessie finished, almost wincing not wanting to see the look on their faces in response.

Mama and Tom just paused in thought and looked at each other. Tom was quicker to speak than Mama of course.

"What do you mean? You can't be serious. You're gonna go back with the man who you ran away from four years ago just like that? Come on, Jessie, you know better."

"Pop... he's changed. He's not who he used to be. We're going to just try it out. What happened was four years ago. If I can see past it surely you can." Jessie insisted, this time with a hint of annoyance. Tom looked down at his plate and sighed. He finally nodded in agreement, knowing that at the end of the day it just mattered what Jessie wanted and what she felt was right for her and Charley.

"I think we're just... shocked is all. It was like one day you were perfectly fine with the life you had and now..." Mama explained.

"It's all changing. Yeah, I get it." Jessie sympathized. "And I know it's going to be hard and I know there are a lot of things we haven't thought about yet but we're just going to try. We're gonna start by visiting Outer Banks as a family... that's where I used to live." Jessie answered with a soft tone in her voice.

"You used to live steps from the beach and yet you chose to come here?" Mama joked. Jessie and Rafe just laughed.

"Yeah, this was the place I knew I could disappear. You know that, Mama."

"Yeah, I remember darling. I'm just glad you guys are getting another shot at being a family. Pop and I always wanted that for you, but we weren't quite sure it was ever going to happen." Mama ended her sentence with a giggle looking over at Tom. Tom chuckled as well.

"Of course we want the best for you, and hope everything works out, but you better come back and see us!" Tom exclaimed.

"Of course we will! I couldn't imagine a life without you guys." Jessie reassured as she went to give Tom a hug. Rafe sat there with a content smile on his face, silently thanking them for understanding.

"I promise we'll come back to visit as often as we can, and you guys are more than welcome to come see us anytime, my treat." Rafe said as Jessie went to hug Mama also.

"Oh, Tom wouldn't a vacation sound so fun?! Maybe one day we might even be invited to a wedding!" Mama hinted with excitement as she held Jessie's shoulders. Jessie just giggled nervously while looking at Rafe. Rafe smiled and hung his head down as if to prepare for the news they were both about to break.

"Hehe, yeah... about that..." Jessie started as she looked around at Mama and Tom with a clear nervous look. Mama and Tom looked confused as they narrowed their eyebrows.

"We're already married." Rafe chuckled as he threw his hands out awkwardly and slowly nodded his head.

"You got married to this man while you were gone? Thats what you were doing?!" Tom asked as he looked back at Jessie with judgement written all over his face. Oh great, this was about to be the cherry on top.

"Um, no.... We got married four years ago... before things went sour and I left." Jessie replied sheepishly, her posture showing she wanted to physically retreat into whatever shell she could find. There was an awkward pause as everyone tried to collect their thoughts, thankfully Charley was still eating her chicken nuggets happily in the corner and completely oblivious. Finally Tom slowly turned his head back to Rafe with a clear look of anger.

"You let your pregnant wife leave you and you didn't even think to go after her and make this work four years ago?!" Tom exclaimed a little louder than he should have.

"Tom!" Mama whisper-shouted, signally that he needed to keep his voice down. Tom breathed out heavily in frustration but understood.

"I didn't know she was pregnant. Jessie didn't tell me. But either way don't act like you know me, okay? You don't think I tried to find Jessie in every corner of this earth? You don't think I loved her enough to try and find her? Don't insult me like that ever again! You don't know the sleep I lost and worry I couldn't get away from when she left. Hell, that never went away! I never stopped looking for Jessie. There was never a moment when I didn't want to find her." Rafe spat as he got out of his seat and hovered over Tom with a look in his eyes that could kill. Tom didn't take that sitting down- literally- he stood up to meet Rafe with just as much fierceness.

"Well clearly you didn't look hard enough!" Tom retorted, still a little too loudly.

"It's not like I made myself easy to find, Pop! I changed my number, changed where I lived, and everything in between! I knew Rafe wouldn't have let me go that easily, that's the very reason I didn't tell him I was pregnant. I would've stayed and we wouldn't have grown up! But we're adults now and we can handle this! Rafe isn't to blame for all this. I left! This is the last time I'm going to let you fault Rafe over something that happened years ago!" Jessie demanded. Despite all that Rafe had done to Jessie and to many others, Jessie always saw something in Rafe that nobody else did. Rafe was always her Achilles heal, and that's exactly why she left years ago.

"Tom, she's right. You need to settle down." Mama said with a much more serious tone in her voice. Tom took the hint and sighed as he sat back down.

"I'm sorry, Jess, I just-"

"Don't be sorry Pop." Jessie said as she went around the counter to give Tom a hug. "You're like a father to me, you know that. I appreciate that you care so much... but you've gotta trust me on this one." Jessie assured. Tom nodded in agreement and quickly tried to change the subject to something more hopeful.

"So, when you leaving?"

DO URSELF A FAVOR AND LISTEN TO “HIDE MY GUN” BY POSTY AND JUST THINK ABOUT RAFE CAMERON

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 39

*** Rafe drove away from JJ's house in a panic once he realized that Jessie really was gone and JJ really didn't know where she was.

Rafe couldn't contain his emotions, leaving him no choice but to pull over. Rafe stared out into the space of the dark road in front of him, only lit by the night sky. All the realization hit him at once as his lips quivered and he narrowed his eyes, trying not to let the tears spill out.

He almost hit Jessie. Over a simple conversation that she was totally justified in having. She wanted him off the coke. But she started it right? Rafe thought that argument was childish. He felt nothing but childish after the temper tantrum he threw at both Jessie and JJ. Rafe wondered what was wrong with him, he had been angry before, but he felt a new sense of helplessness... like he was spinning out of control and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

Rafe finally let it all out. The sobs were ugly and reckless as he lost control of his breathing. Rafe had nobody there to calm him down, only the voices in his head.

Be a man. Men don't cry. Rafe heard his father's voice. The same words he heard when he was ten years old, and from that point forward. The words be a man plagued him everyday of his life. Those words were enough to make him dry his eyes, wipe his face, and somehow go completely numb inside. Ward always had that affect on Rafe.

Deciding not to let Jessie have any more of this night, Rafe called the only person he knew could fix this, but fix was a strong word, it was more like putting a bandaid over a bullet hole. Rafe didn't care.

"Man, what do you want? It's too late for this sh-"

"I'm coming over." Rafe interrupted Barry, who sounded less than thrilled.

"Man you were just here?!" Barry replied annoyance and disbelief. "Are you already out?!"

"Not yet, but I will be." Rafe responded with numbness that chilled even Barry through the phone. Rafe simply hung up and Barry knew it couldn't be good.

Barry did the only thing he could think to do: call Jessie. Him and Jessie had a very odd relationship, one that was constantly moving and changing, one minute she would be a smoke buddy, the next minute a buyer, and the next a bitch. It all depended on each other's mood, but in a weird way, Barry always felt bad for Jessie. After all, Jessie only started buying for her father, eventually letting it trickle into her life as well, and now Barry had a front row seat at watching the drug trap another man that Jessie cared about.

Barry called Jessie over and over again, to no avail. The fact that she didn't answer really concerned him, his mind began to wonder to the worst possible scenario, especially with Rafe being so... unpredictable at the moment.

Barry blew up Jessie's phone, every passing ring only adding to his worry, until he saw Rafe pull up. At this point Barry was just plain mad, knowing that Rafe must've had something to do with Jessie not answering her phone.

Barry was anxious to meet Rafe right in the middle of the yard, not letting Rafe come to him like he usually does.

"What the hell, country club? Why your girl ain't answering her phone?"

"Shit, I don't know man. Just leave me alone." Rafe mumbled as he put his hand in Barry's face and walked right past him towards the front door of the trailer. Barry couldn't believe the balls Rafe had on him at the moment, clearly not caring about anyone or anything. It was only a preview of the facade he would adopt for the next four years.

"You don't know? Bullshit you don't know Rafe! You know damn well where Jessie is! You better not have sent her into hiding until the bruises heal-"

"I didn't touch her, okay?!" Rafe screamed, not being able to take the mental gymnastics any longer. "And I'm not bullshitting you... I don't know where she is man!" Rafe explained still heated. He finally looked down at the ground then back up at Barry with more sadness behind his faded eyes. "She left."

"What the hell does that mean, she left?" Barry asked, trying to adopt the same demeanor of not caring, even though he clearly did, at least in a "she's my best customer" kinda way.

"She left. Are you slow or something?" Rafe laughed maniacally as he furrowed his brows and walked closer to Barry. Rafe had no regard for his life any more, and at this point he was looking for a fight— another defense mechanism he would become very familiar with over the course of the next few years.

"No I'm not slow you piece of shit!" Barry mouthed back as he shoved Rafe back. "You're just being vague as hell and it doesn't sound very convincing."

"Well I'm not worried about convincing you." Rafe whispered with a twisted smile. He began to look off into the dark distance. "I'm not worried about convincing anyone." He explained with a dark glint in his eye that Barry hadn't seen before. "So you got more coke or not?" He asked, this time a little more in touch with reality.

"Yeah..." Barry trailed off as he was trying to read whatever Rafe was fantasizing about behind those eyes, he was unsuccessful. Barry just walked inside, looking over his shoulder, feeling like Rafe could easily kill him quickly and quietly with the way he was acting.

"Take your shit and leave." Barry snapped as he took the money from Rafe.

"It was good to see ya." Rafe said as he turned and walked away with a smile Barry couldn't see.

Rafe climbed back into his truck and sped off, pulling out his phone to call the only other person on this island he could count on. 

"What the hell, man? Do you have any idea what time it is?" Topper's voice sounded through the other line. 

"Yeah, yeah, man, whatever. Hey, party at my house tomorrow night. My parents will be out of town. Invite anyone. Party of the century man." The line went dead for a couple seconds. 

"Anyone?" 

"Anyone." 

- - - 

Music was blaring. Bodies were taking up almost the entire first floor of the house. If there was one thing about Topper, he knew how to throw a rager. Kooks, tourons, even pogues were at the Cameron's that fateful night. But Rafe said anyone, right? At that point Rafe didn't really care, the more people the better. Every person was just one more distraction for Rafe Cameron to forget about the one person he wanted to see there. To say it didn't work was a lie, it did work, and that's what threw Rafe into four years of sex, money, and drugs. The parties, the drugs, the fights, seemed to be the closest thing to numbing the pain. 

Rafe made his way around to everyone at the party, slapping his friends on the back and saying hi to everyone he could. The smile on his face was bold, but not the same one he used to beam when he had his Jessie around. 

"Dude, you were right. This is the party of the century! I'm pretty sure some girl is topless in the pool right now." Topper laughed as he met Rafe in the kitchen to pour himself another drink.

"I knew it would be, thanks to you." Rafe replied as he squeezed Topper's shoulders. "But hey, the real party's upstairs." Rafe trailed off with a smirk and a raise of his eyebrows. Topper searched Rafe's bloodshot and watery eyes for a semblance of what that meant, and he thought he had a pretty good idea. Up until tonight Rafe was decent at hiding his coke addiction from his friends and family, Jessie really was the only one who ever saw it, and for good reason. 

"Dude... what do you mean?" Topper asked with a hint of worry to his face. He figured Rafe's newly disheveled and reckless state had to be tied to whatever he was referring to upstairs.  

Rafe didn't reply with words, only a swift nod of the head as if to say come with me.

The sound of the party faded into the distance as Topper followed Rafe up the winding wooden staircase, to be met with a new smell, one that replaced the smell of sweaty bodies and alcohol and was replaced with a smell of skunk and other substances. Topper had a feeling he knew where this was going. 

Rafe opened the door to a spare bedroom, smart enough not to let anyone use his room for such activities. After all, his room was a mess anyways, he hadn't cared to clean it ever since Jessie left. He had let himself go in just about every way possible, and his room was no exception. 

Topper was met with a sight to behold, plenty of people doing lines right off the glass table and  enough weed to go around for the rest of the night. 

"Dude," Topper harshly whispered as he pulled Rafe's shoulder so he would face him. Topper looked less than impressed, and Rafe didn't look too fond of the judgement Topper was so clearly giving him either. "Are you insane? W-What you're into hard drugs now? Is that why Jessie left?" Topper snapped with furrowed brows. He had never seen Rafe so wild and careless, the kook king was typically anything but those two things. 

"Don't" Rafe snapped back with a little too much force, he stopped himself from laying a hand on Topper as he withdrew his fist and let his hand hang loosely beside him. "... talk about Jessie, okay? She's gone. And this night isn't about her." Rafe mumbled with a sly smile, trying to play it off like he didn't almost just pummel his best friend over speaking the name of the love of his life. He had successfully managed to dodge those questions and those feelings tonight, and Topper clearly just ruined that streak, making Rafe feel like he definitely needed a line now. 

Considering the newfound mix of emotions Rafe was feeling, he did just that. He went over to the glass table, not bothering to pay anyone considering it was his coke and lined up the white powder just right before taking a quick drag and sniffling soon afterwards. Topper still couldn't believe his eyes, he genuinely thought he was dreaming. 

"Okay, seriously," Topper began as he rubbed his head, "did someone slip something in my drink or did you just do coke right in front of me?" Topper asked. Rafe just stood up from the couch and laughed. 

"Dude, you're not hallucinating. And you need to chill, it's just something to take the edge off." Rafe replied as he patted Topper's shoulders. 

"Why're you doing this Rafe? Why're you throwing your life away? You know that's where this leads, right? You're starting to act like a po-"

"Shut up, man!" Rafe corrected Topper as he gave him a swift and forceful shove. Rafe gritted his teeth as the words left his mouth, clearly fed up with the accusations. 

Rafe already felt his life had been thrown away, and that was long before Jessie ever entered the picture. Rafe got dangerously close to Topper, this time looking him dead in the eyes with his chest moving rapidly and his blown pupils looking strait at Topper's normal ones. 

"The rest of my life is going to be filled with kook dinner parties, kook business deals, and all other kook shit. For just one night, I wanna have a little fun." Rafe said through anger, doing a great job at disguising the hopelessness he had been feeling since Jessie left, the same hopelessness he had when he met her that night at the Island Club, the same hopelessness that Jessie so effortlessly relinquished him from. 

Whether it was through fear or pity, Topper received the message loud and clear, only nodding his head, not daring to peel his eyes away from Rafe for one second for fear of what he could do to him. Rafe noticed one thing in particular about the past 24 hours. Barry and Topper seemed to look at him differently, with a newfound fear-no, respect- for Rafe Cameron. Rafe thought maybe this is what his father was meaning all those years, maybe this level of reverence was what Ward was trying to instill in him, and he just never found it until tonight. Rafe started to relish the way everyone looked at him, like he held all the power in the room, like he was unstoppable, unapproachable, and untouchable. He loved it. 

What started as a night meant to mask the heartache turned into a lifestyle of commanding the room. 

be mindful of why you're on tumblr to read fanfics readers, u see how i don't post hateful comments on other writers' works, cause that's very inconsiderate and not cutesy. instead, if i don't like the fic i simply stop reading it and move on to read another fic that i'll like, very demure, very respectful, very approachable. let's be mindful 🙄

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 27

Rafe and Jessie slipped back down the stairs after putting Charley to bed. Jessie sighed as she took the last step off the stairs with Rafe behind her, looking at the mess in front of her. Toys everywhere, food still out on the counter, etc. but Jessie wouldn't dare complain, her house and her heart were full. Still, Rafe understood the reason for her sigh.

"What would you like me to do first? Pick up the room or help in the kitchen?" Rafe asked as he snaked his arms around Jessie and lowered his head to be next to hers. Jessie grabbed Rafe's arms in response and leaned her head into Rafe's chest.

"Why don't you just help me in the kitchen and we'll work our way through everything together. Can you start by grabbing the plates from the table?" Jessie inquired with a half smile.

"Of course I can." Rafe whispered as he planted a kiss on Jessie's cheek and pulled away.

Rafe did just that, eventually working his way into the kitchen to help load the dishwasher and wipe the counters. Once that was done, the two of them made their way into the living room to pick up Charley's toys. They both ended up on their hands and knees crawling around looking for any toys that could be hidden or lodged underneath any furniture. Eventually they both made their way around the coffee table from opposite directions, their eyes meeting thankfully before their heads collided.

As their eyes locked, no words needed to be said, a clear message being received. Rafe looked at Jessie's lips and then back to her eyes. Jessie leaned in and their lips finally crashed together. Rafe pulled Jessie closer as their lips moved in perfect sync. They eventually sat in the floor in between the coffee table and the couch making out innocently. They both were simply enjoying each other's presence. Eventually Rafe broke away, despite his desire to keep this going for hours on end.

"We need to talk." Rafe proclaimed out of breath as he held Jessie's face, both of them propped up against the couch while still sitting on the floor. Jessie tried to catch her breath also, clearly annoyed and focused on other things.

"Do we have to?" Jessie whispered, still locked on Rafe. Rafe just chuckled in response and looked down at the carpet.

"Yes... we do." He answered with a half smile of assurance as he brushed some hair away from Jessie's face. "It's nothing bad, but I just want to talk."

"Ugh come on Rafe, I just need one day where everything is perfect. Can we please just do this tomorrow?" Jessie pleaded.

"That's what I want to talk to you about... tomorrow." Rafe trailed off. "What does tomorrow look like for you?" Rafe asked. Jessie just sighed, clearly she was being roped into this conversation one way or the other.

"I don't know." Jessie stated honestly. "What does it look like for you?"

Rafe looked down at the shaggy rug they were sitting on and began to play with some loose strings of the carpet as he contemplated his answer. He wanted to be honest, but he also wasn't sure how honest he should be.

"I want you to come back with me." Rafe looked up and into Jessie's eyes with hope. He decided to just cut to the chase. Jessie was a little taken back by his boldness, but she knew this conversation was going to have to happen.

"Well, it's not that easy, Rafe. I mean, Charley and I have built a life here and we-"

"And I get that, and I would move here but... you know that all of my business is back in OBX." Rafe replied in a hushed tone, trying to show sincerity and regard for Jessie's point of view. Jessie just sighed and looked down, suddenly finding the carpet just as interesting as Rafe did.

"Yeah, I know." Jessie said sadly, never looking up as she played with the carpet. Rafe could tell he had upset Jessie, and that was definitely not his intentions. Maybe he should have waited to have this conversation tomorrow.

Rafe sighed and tilted Jessie's chin up to look at him as he cracked a half smile.

"I just thought since you only left OBX because of me you'd want to come back now that we're back together. I just figured you missed everyone." Rafe replied. Jessie knew he had a point, she had dreamed of coming back to be with the pogues, but she never did because of Rafe. Now that Rafe and her were back together, she had no reason to stay in Manhattan right?

"You can't really tell me that you're tied to this place like you are OBX can you?" Rafe insisted as he brushed some hair out of Jessie's face.

"No but, I am a part of a family here that took me in when I needed them most. I can't just forget that." Jessie answered.

"Well this isn't to say we can't come back and visit, baby. And one day I might be able to move business here. But either way, if they're your family, they'll understand and support you." Rafe said. Jessie looked down again to think for a moment.

"Yeah, I guess. It's just going to be a big change for Charley and I don't know how she's going to adjust. She's going to meet a lot of new people that know a lot about the both of us and growing up in that is going to be hard." Jessie continued.

"I understand, I really do, but her being so young might help. She won't exactly remember this place in detail. And besides, you've already seemed to introduce her to the idea of OBX. I mean... her room looks just like something you'd see back home." Rafe assured her with a smile.

"Yeah... she does like to dress up like an island girl." Jessie laughed.

"See, exactly! She'd fit in great and she'd love Sarah and Kie." Rafe explained with more hope in his eyes.

"Well, how about we do this in baby steps for everyone involved? How about we just visit OBX as a family, get all of the pogues introduced to the idea? Oh and before we do that we also need to introduce you to Mama and Tom." Jessie stated.

"That's just fine, whatever you want baby." Rafe reassured Jessie as he nodded his head in agreement with an even bigger smile on his face. Jessie just smiled in agreement. She began to form this look on her face, showing that she was thinking about something. She began to trail her hand towards the waist line of Rafe's jeans and eventually trailed her fingers upwards across his chest.

"You know what I want right nooooow..." Jessie insinuated as she had her bedroom eyes in full force looking dead on at Rafe.

"Oh I got a pretty good idea." Rafe understood the assignment as he leaned in to kiss Jessie tenderly, eventually deepening the kiss. Jessie reciprocated by cupping Rafe's face and scooting closer towards him, eventually finding her way on his lap. Rafe found his way to Jessie's hips, giving them gentle squeezes. Between kisses, Rafe eventually moved Jessie down to the carpet, hovering over her. Between the movements, Jessie started giggling against Rafe's lips.

"What are you laughing at?" Rafe asked as he pulled away to laugh a little himself.

"Nothing, we're just rolling around on this floor like I don't have a perfectly good bed upstairs. And Charley could come down here any minute." Jessie explained with a smile as she looked up at Rafe. Rafe was supporting himself with his arms as he hovered over her and laughed again.

"Some things never change." Rafe responded as he got up from the floor and grabbed Jessie to wrap her legs around his waist so they could continue kissing, making his way upstairs.

---

Rafe woke up the next morning feeling a heavy weight on his chest. Not figuratively, literally. He also felt a small finger poking at his face.

"Daddy?" Rafe heard a small voice whisper ever so close to him. That was enough to pull him out of his slumber and make him realize it wasn't a dream. He opened his eyes to his beautiful daughter sitting a on his chest and indeed poking his face.

"Daddy?" Charlotte asked again, this time a little louder now that she realized he was awake. Rafe couldn't believe his ears. She already caught on to the idea that he was daddy, whether she knew what that meant, he didn't know, and he didn't care. He tried not to jump for joy and wake Jessie up, who was asleep up against his side cuddling his arm wrapped around her.

"Yes, princess?" Rafe mumbled with sleepy eyes and a groggy voice. He squinted to try and get a better look at Charley.

"Daddy!" Charley said with excitement as she realized she had called him by the right name. "I'm hungry." She said as she laid her head on Rafe's chest. Rafe melted at the contact, wrapping his other free arm around Charley to pat her back.

"Ok, darling, I'll make you some breakfast." Rafe replied as he tried to ease his way out of bed so he didn't wake Jessie.

"No, mommy make it!" Charley demanded a little louder than Rafe would have liked. Rafe immediately put his finger up to his lips to indicate Charley needed to be a bit quieter. Funnily enough, Charley understood and showed remorse by widening her eyes and covering her mouth with both of her little hands. Rafe found it completely adorable and really funny.

"Mommy's sleeping, daddy can make it." Rafe assured through a whisper as he got out of bed. He put some sweatpants on, realizing he was only in his underwear. Rafe was grateful he at least had those on. Charley just simply nodded and waddled out of the room in anticipation. Rafe followed behind with a smile on his face as he shut the door and went downstairs.

He found Charley trying to get up onto the island as she grabbed her step stool. Rafe understood and rather than let her struggle, he picked her up and put her on the counter.

"What do you want for breakfast?" Rafe asked her as he set each arm on different sides of his daughter on the counter and looked at her lovingly.

Charley scratched her head almost comically as she looked around trying to think of what she wanted... or more so what it was called. When she realized she didn't know what it was that mommy made her she just threw up her hands and shrugged in defeat. Rafe laughed and went to fridge.

"I bet I know something you'd like." Rafe said as he looked in the fridge. Sure enough he saw just what he was looking for. He figured Jessie always had the stuff on hand to make her favorite.

Rafe begins to make the chocolate chip pancake batter that he never forgot how to whip up. Charley watched intently, the steps looking familiar to her. Rafe noticed her ogling the batter.

"Is this what mommy makes?" Rafe asked as he continued whisking. Charley simply nodded frantically in excitement. Rafe laughed as he made his way behind him to the stove to start making the pancakes. What he didn't know is that Charley was sneaking chocolate chips out of the bag he left open behind her. Rookie mistake. Rafe eventually heard the bag crinkle and without hesitation corrected his daughter.

"Get your hand out of the chocolate chips." Rafe sassed with a half smile as he continued flipping the pancakes. Charley straightened up immediately, looking straight at Rafe as if to show she had never done anything wrong. Once Rafe was at a stopping point, he went back over to Charley and put her on his hip and continued cooking.

Rafe let Charley help of course, instructing her to put some pieces of bacon on the other skillet in front of him. They weren't laid in there perfectly of course but they would do just fine.

"You're a great helper, you know that?" Rafe smiled at Charley. Unbeknownst to Rafe, Jessie was watching the whole exchange at the bottom of the stairs. Seeing Rafe standing there looking so comfortable with his daughter and in that environment filled Jessie with so much joy and assurance. Jessie couldn't imagine a life without Rafe now, whatever that looked like. Seeing the sight in front of her really gave her the reassurance she needed that she could follow Rafe wherever they needed to go, as long as it kept their family together. How could she separate them now? After all, they were all doing so great.

Jessie eventually made her way into the kitchen in a large tshirt and pajama shorts, running her hand against Rafe's shirtless back and swinging around to give him a gentle kiss. She eventually gave Charley a kiss on the cheek as well.

"Good morning." Rafe said as he pulled away from the kiss with a small smile.

"Good morning." Jessie replied. The sight in front of her couldn't help but make her want to kiss Rafe again, so she did, this time not breaking away. The two of them both forgot for a moment that their daughter was right there. Furthermore, Charley had never seen her mommy with someone like that before, so she wasn't quite sure what to do. Like any three year old, she slowly inched her face closer to her parents just staring intently until she was mere inches away from both of them. They both stopped as they felt Charley's breath on the sides of their faces, causing both of them to giggle.

"Can I help you?" Rafe sassed as he looked over at Charley, who had since backed up. Charley just giggled in response and bashfully dipped her head into Rafe's neck.

"Breakfast is almost ready." Rafe laughed as he let Charley down to grab some plates. Jessie got Charley in her high chair and got ready to eat.

All three of them sat down to eat, sitting in a comfortable silence until Rafe finally spoke up.

"So have you thought anymore about what I said last night?" Rafe asked in between bites of his food. Jessie looked down at her food trying to come up with a suitable answer.

"Yeah... I think today we should at least introduce you to Mama and Tom and then plan when we're going to visit OBX." Jessie replied as she picked at the pancakes in front of her. Rafe nodded in reply as he continued to eat.

"I can have a flight for us ready by tomorrow morning." Rafe said with hope in his voice. Jessie still thought it was a little quick and maybe too much too soon for Charley but she agreed.

The next hour was spent getting the kitchen cleaned up and getting ready for the day, specifically getting ready to go meet Mama and Tom and tell them the plan. Jessie felt this had to happen considering she worked at the bar they owned and pretty much owed them her life considering the big help they always were to her. 

With all that being said, they decided to meet Mama and Tom at the restaurant before they opened for the day.