Katvenus - PANDORA

I used to take some pretty dope photos back then...

My girl, my girl, don’t lie to me, tell me where did you sleep last night…

So yesterday, July 27th 2024, I had this random urge of downloading tumblr, rediscovering my account. Since I didn't even remember I had an account, I had to request a new password, leading me to my old hotmail outlook so I could change it. To my surprise I found not 1, but 2 emails from Tumblr; a recent one requesting the password change and one sent earlier at 15:27 stating: "PANDORA turns 12 years old today!".

At first glance I was confused since I knew "Pandora" was the name I gave to my alter ego when I was a teen, but I didn't remember anything about this old tumblr account of mine, at all.

Apparently, part of me (Pandora, perhaps?) did remember though, since I just happened to log back into my dead tumblr exactly on its 12th anniversary, unbeknownst to me, and stumbled upon my old posts, pictures, scattered thoughts, narrow interests of that time... and upon the "#2014 revival" hashtags and blogs, which has surprisingly awakened a spark of nostalgia to my 2014 days...

I never really used tumblr that much even back then (as you can see if you look through my blog) and I highly doubt anyone will read this, but I thought stumbling upon my old blog on its anniversary and revisiting the sh*tposting of my younger self seemed like such a fated thing that I've decided it was worth writing about it and the feelings and thoughts it has evoked in me so that when 12 years from now I remember tumblr again I get to see a glimpse of yet another version of myself through the years.

Although I am a completely different person now (or perhaps, just a different version of the same person) and everything has changed so much, inside and out, I think I'm finally able of doing what 2014 me couldn't do and reconcile all parts of me, both good and bad, dark, light and even grey, and leave this blog up just as it was, even though I don't relate to past me anymore, because I guess she's still part of me somehow and I'm not ashamed of her the way she used to be.

And maybe even... with this whole 2014 nostalgia, looking back at my own picture and remembering those times... I might as well try to relive the blog to further feed into the nostalgia. Oh, to be 16 again, listening to the Arctic Monkeys and taking soft grunge/tumblr aesthetic photos as I changed my hair color every other week... Such a time of my life I truly thought I would never really miss but I guess it's already been long enough by now that it is worth the nostalgia!

She said, "I want to sleep in the city that never wakes up and revel in nostalgia"