I Want To Hug The Moon, It Looks Like She Would Like One

I want to hug the moon, it looks like she would like one

this girl was bitching about me and when I found out, she said she is sorry not because she actually was but because I found out, basically, she got exposed and all okay but ykw she said to me she was like- "I am really sorry yaar flow flow mein bol diya tha tu toh hai bhi 'therapist friend' toh maaf kardegi na. We good?" 'we good?' jaaye tel lene, mtlb yaar chomu bhi mein banu aur dyaalu bhi aur god ji I was toh flabbergasted. She was acting all 'not my fault' about what she did like totally avoiding being accountable for her actions, the AUDACITY

I'm definitely a big fan of sharing love, but when my younger sis goes all huggy and kissy with our mom (not w me, as I genuinely dislike this and she knows she might get a smack for it), it's like, "Okay, that's cute, I guess?" But tbh, it sort of makes me cringe, and I'm silently pleading, "Could you maybe not do that when I'm around?" or I make a concerted effort to ignore it before I lose my mind. It simply feels different and strange.

cupid is shooting its shot and I am constantly dodging it bc my attachment and abandonment issues said, "no thank you, we have got enough problems"

the urge to look at the moon and ask her "do you think, I am good enough?" the urge to let out all the secrets to her that I haven't even told myself out loud

I think something is wrong with me but at the same time idk what is right with me so does that automatically make it sound like something is wrong with me? Does this make sense? I hope it does.