clouditae

the sun kissed him

ivory | writer | 18+

808 posts

Always Find You

Amazing banner maker @ressjeon thank you so much love ♡

Word: 3.9k

Again and again Taehyung has seen you appear before him, and again and again you’re never within his grasp. No matter where you go, what life you live, he’ll always find you.

To @crazy4myself I’m your secret admirer :) I truly hope you like this fic. I know I told you that I had something planned based off everything you told me, but I couldn’t help but write this, and the time crunching is totally my fault because I do not know what planning is lol. But I hope you like it and I really enjoyed our conversations even though school was just kicking my ass lol. Happy Valentine’s Day! ♡

When Taehyung first saw you, he forgot how to breathe.

You stand on the balcony looking out onto the hundreds of knights pledging their lives to your family. He is one of those knights.

Your hair is up in a perfect bun, the crown shining brightly at the top of your head, but your smile—God when you smile it’s like his whole world is brighter than it’s ever been. Your father—the king, is speaking to the crowd below him. He’s loud, encouraging, speaking with so much motivation that he knows His Royal Highness is so well versed in this that there’s no emotion in them anymore.

They’re all sent off to a worthless war and nearly less than half comeback to tell the tale. It’s just an endless cycle until all kingdoms stop fighting for land. It’s a cycle Taehyung happened to be born into. A simple commoner who was chosen to fight for his king.

His eyes avert back to you, watching you as you remain stoic and beautiful. He wonders if he were born into a higher class, would you notice him? Would those mysterious eyes meet his one day? Would you smile his way? Would he be your first pick over the huge line of suitors wanting to take your hand even though he has nothing?

“The kingdom and its people are forever grateful for your heroic actions to protect us!” the king bellows, his hand outstretched towards his knights as if he’s blessing them all before their deaths.

The men yell in response as they march forward, through the gate and towards the enemy line. As he follows, Taehyung manages to get one last glance towards you, your radiant smile sending a chill down his spine. It’s all the encouragement he needs to march forward and fight this damn fight.

Taehyung never made it back home that day.

When Taehyung was a kid, his dad told him the stories of soulmates. A story that when two soulmates meet, their fate is sealed with a kiss. A kiss that binds them together forever. Taehyung always thought that story was ridiculous. A kiss sealing the two?

He thought it was even more ridiculous when his dad added, “When two soulmates do not seal their destiny with a kiss, their life is repeated. When they die, they are reincarnated and are set to find their soulmates once again. This cycle is repeated over and over again until they’re together.”

He would laugh at the story his father always told him until one day he saw you.

You’re wearing a black and white polka dot dress, your small heels clicking against the concrete floor as you run, a book clutched to your chest. You look excited, your eyes shining more brightly than they did when you looked out across the sea of knights ready for war. Taehyung never believed in soulmates until that day. Until that day where he saw you for the second time in his life, a memory he always thought was a dream became his past life.

He wonders where you’re heading. To school maybe? The building is in that general direction. What are you like in class? With that excited look on your face, he’s guessing you’re the first one to raise your hand when the teacher asks a question. The kind of student who writes almost everything down so that you can go over it after class when you’re home. You might be the kind of person who prefers to study and learn new things rather than play with the other kids.

He wishes he can go to school. To see what you’re like personally. Yet he can’t. Taehyung learns what he can from his mom when he’s not working. It seems like in this lifetime, Taehyung has to make ends meet.

Taehyung wants to meet you. He wants to meet the person who may be his soulmate—who he wants to be his soulmate. He’s seen you before, and here you are again… this is fate right?

“Taehyung! Get back to work,” his boss yells, lifting a rock almost twice Taehyung’s size up and onto the wooden barrel.

“Yes Sir,” he calls back, grabbing a rock heavier than his own weight to place into the barrel that is one rock away from breaking.

Would he want to kiss you in this lifetime? In this lifetime where your life is so much better than his? Where you can find a better suitor than him that will take care of you because he’s better than Taehyung? What if you already found someone? Is it too late for him to meet you?

What if you’re not his soulmate, but someone who is sent to make him believe you are? What if in every life he lives, you’re there to torment him?

Soulmates are stupid. They don’t exist—

“Taehyung watch out!”

Soulmates are stupid… right?

When he sees you again, Taehyung learns your name. Y/N.

He’s never heard such a beautiful name in his entire life. Your name makes his heart race, and your voice…

He finally gets to meet you—see you closer than he has before. See the details in your eyes, the way they gleam when you talk about something you love. The way a blush tint crosses your face when you realize you’ve been talking for too long.

You’re perfect.

Everything about you is perfect to him. He wants to be with you already. He’s seen you in so many of his past lives, learning a thing here and there, but now you’re here. Sitting across from him in your yellow dress, your hands clutching onto it as you watch the bottle spin round and round.

Will it land on him? Will today be the day your fates are sealed?

The bottle slows, his heart practically in his throat as the bottle finally comes to a stop. Butterflies erupt in his stomach as he glances up at you from the bottle that is pointing at him. He can see that cute blush tint on your cheeks as you meet his eyes.

He’ll make you happy. He’ll give you everything you want if it means he can see that smile everyday for the rest of his life. He’ll work ten times harder to give you the life you deserve—nothing will stand in his way.

The crowd cheers as the two of you lean towards one another, but their cheers are soon tuned out by the rapid beating of his heart. He can feel your warm breath hitting his lips, your nose brushing against his own.

“The cops are coming!”

He no longer feels your breath against his skin.

“Fuck,” he mutters, head hanging low in defeat.

Why is fate toying with him?

Jumping to his feet, Taehyung runs with the crowd of frightened and excited teens up the stairs towards the kitchen and out the kitchen door that leads to the backyard. No cops have entered the backyard yet, so he can just hop a few fences and be in the clear.

“Damn shame you didn’t get that kiss,” Zane says, placing a hand on Taehyung’s shoulder in sympathy. “That would have been one helluva kiss.”

Taehyung sighs, “No kidding.”

“We better leave before the cops show up,” Zane says, running ahead and over the fence with ease.

Of course he makes it look easy. He’s the school’s star athlete, but Taehyung on the other hand…

Getting a running start, Taehyung grabs onto the fence, jumping as high as he can, throwing one leg over the fence. His other leg, on the other hand, hits the fence, causing him to lose his grip and sends him to the ground, landing on his back. Taehyung lets out a low groan, lying still as he regains his ability to breathe.

Zane leans over him, a smug grin plastered on his damn face. “For someone who fights a lot, you sure don’t know how to land on your feet.”

“Shut the hell up,” Taehyung mutters, taking Zane’s extended hand as he gets up. The sound of sirens are loud and clear, yelling is faint but there.

“Put that stamina to good use, Tae,” Zane says before taking off.

Taehyung got away like usual. With how often he’s had run ins with the police, he might as well be an expert in getaways. That’s no life he should be living if this is the life he completes with you. He needs to do better—be better for you.

Tossing the extinguished cigarette along with the pile, Taehyung walks past the library building with a direction in mind. If you’re not in the library like he originally thought, that means you’re somewhere on campus chatting with your friends or alone, letting the warm rays of sun keep you warm on this breezy day.

Rounding the corner, Taehyung stops dead in his tracks, his heart dropping to his stomach. Zane breaks the kiss, a familiar blush tint gracing its presence across your face as you look down in embarrassment. Zane grins as he caresses your cheek—the cheek that only Taehyung is meant to touch.

Once again, you’re taken away from him.

“So it’s a date then?” Zane asks, his tone full of pride it makes Taehyung sick. What pride does he get out of this for taking someone else’s soulmate away from them?

“It’s a date,” you mutter, the smallest smile showing on your lips.

Taehyung doesn’t stick around to see your lips meet Zane’s again. He doesn’t stick around for the next class to start.

He’s tired.

He’s tired of being born over and over again. He’s tired of seeing you within his grasp only to be taken away from him. He’s tired of going through family after family—each family slowly being forgotten—so many memories blurring together that he doesn’t know which parent belongs to which life.

But he knows one thing. His dad is a liar. Whichever one told him of soulmates is a liar. They’re not real. Having a soulmate is bull shit. There’s no binding, no happily ever after. Everything is a lie. The only thing Taehyung is living a life where he sees the one person he believes to be his soulmate taunt him with the idea of being together.

“Damnit,” he cries, furiously wiping away the tears that never seem to stop falling.

He wants to be happy, why is that so hard to ask for?

Taehyung feels the warm rays of the sun warm his face, the sounds of people chatting, and a few birds chirping as he slowly begins to wake up. He wonders how long he’s been sleeping. A few minutes? Hours? Either way, after a whole day of cram studying, that rest was definitely needed.

He opens his eyes to a slit, shutting them close from the bright sun. He sits up, resting his elbows on the table and rubbing his eyes of sleep. “Morning, sunshine,” a voice next to him says as he turns to look at the figure.

You don’t bother looking at him as your eyes travel from your textbook to your notes. “How long was I out?” he asks you in a gravelly tone.

“Not sure. I’ve been here for about fifteen minutes, so more than that,” you answer, flipping to the next page to continue your notes. Taehyung rests his chin on his hand, watching you work diligently.

He wonders how much longer fate will toy with him. Life after life he’s watching you slip through his fingers. He’s tried different approaches to getting you, and each attempt was a joke. Heartache after heartache.

This time… he could just laugh at how fucked up fate is.

In this life, Taehyung grew up to be your best friend since the two of you were infants. Your mom has been friends with his mom since they were in college. The two of you are inseparable. Wherever you go, he’s right behind you. Taehyung has been with you through it all. From when you lost your favorite toy, to your first ever heartache. Everything you’ve been through, and you’re still a fighter.

He admires you and in love with you. There’s the smallest chance that this life will be his last. Maybe he’ll finally be your soulmate like he’s meant to be. He wants to—oh how he wants to be.

“What are you staring at?” you ask, bringing him out of his thoughts.

He blinks a few times, watching you stare at him with curious eyes. “Do you believe in soulmates?” he finally questions.

You frown in confusion. “Soulmates? Where’d that come from?”

He shrugs, dropping his hand from his chin and leans back in his seat. “Just curious.”

You don’t remember him. In all your lives you two have had, never once did you recognize him. He wonders, if you remembered, would you kiss him? Would things change if you remembered?

You’re quiet for a moment, thinking about his question, eyes drifting off somewhere he believes is your own world. You tap your pencil against your notebook, the small beat matching his heart. “I do,” you begin, setting your pencil down, “I believe you can have multiple soulmates in your life. Sometimes you can look at a stranger and just know they’re going to be very important to you in the near future, and I love moments like that.” You look to him again. “I think you’re my twin flame,” you add, that adorable blush gracing your cheeks.

“Twin flame?” he questions. What’s a twin flame? Why are you blushing? Is it embarrassing? What the hell is a twin flame?

“Well would you look at the time,” you start, suddenly changing the subject, “I’m gonna be late for class if I don’t leave now.” He watches you rise from your seat, collecting your belongings as you rush to leave.

“You can’t just leave without telling me what a twin flame is, Y/N,” he tells you, trying to grab something of yours so that you don’t leave, but you’re quicker than he is. “Why were you blushing? Is it something embarrassing? What does it mean,” he complains, watching you leave him alone at the table. “Y/N!” he calls, groaning when you don’t turn around.

He never got you to explain what a twin flame is, and it slips his mind to just look it up. It’s not that hard for him to get easily distracted by you. Especially when he’s head over heels in love with you.

You leap onto his back with little time for him to catch you. You wrap your arms around his neck as you nestle your head on his shoulder. “Thanks for walking me home, Tae,” you tell him.

“I think you mean ride,” he corrects, hoisting you higher so that he has a better hold of you.

You giggle in response before going silent. Nothing is said between the two of you as Taehyung walks the two of you towards your house. He feels you grip him a little tighter before breaking the silence, “Do you believe in soulmates?”

Taehyung almost stops in his tracks, but he manages to keep going, never showing a small change in his pace. If you knew the lives he’s lived, the different ways he’s met you…

“I want to,” he answers.

“What’s keeping you from believing?”

He’s quiet for a moment. How does he tell you it’s because every time he sees you, you don’t see him? How does he tell you that he’s been in love with you for as long as he can remember, and that every life you two have lived, you were never his?

“What if in our past lives, we were never soulmates? What if we crossed paths, but never met the way we are supposed to?” Taehyung looks left then right before crossing the street. “There’s no real sign in knowing who your soulmate is.”

You hum in response, but that hum tells him that you think differently and that you’re about to tell him he’s wrong. And he’s right because you say, “I think if you’ve met your soulmate in your past lives, then they are your soulmate. It just wasn’t the time to be with them. Fate is just waiting for that perfect moment before you two find each other again.”

Taehyung scoffs, “You and I are completely different, Y/N.”

You giggle as he helps you down from his back, the two of you stand in front of your house. “Everyone has a soulmate, Tae.” You dig in your bag for your keys, looking through each key for your house key. “And as my twin, you’ll always find me, right?” You look up to meet his gaze.

He frowns in slight confusion, but answers, “I’ll always find you.”

You smile at him, and the world around him seems to stop. “I’m glad to hear that.”

A few days have passed since Taehyung last saw you. You told him you’ll be busy with an assignment that’s due this Sunday, so Taehyung agrees to let you have your space.

It’s Sunday and Taehyung is sitting at the usual meeting spot on campus. He’s surprised there are quite a lot of people on campus when it’s a Sunday and Valentine’s Day to be exact. It’s the day of love, a day Taehyung has experienced way too many times.

He stares off in the direction you should be coming from, complete boredom etched onto his face as he waits for you. You better get an A if you’re making him wait for you on campus...on a weekend. As he begins to close his eyes, a shadowed figure appears in his peripheral. Taehyung turns in the direction of the figure to see a familiar face. A familiar face with no name coming to mind.

“Hey, I thought I’d find you here,” she says, twirling her blonde hair with her fingers.

“Ah, yeah. Just waiting for Y/N,” he replies. What is her name?

She nods. “Then we have time to talk real quick before Y/N gets here.”

Taehyung gestures to the seat across from him. “What’s up?”

The blonde takes the offer and sits across from Taehyung, looking nervous suddenly. “We’ve known each other for a while, and during that time we’ve known each other, you’ve been a great guy. You’re kind, funny, very good looking”—there’s no way this is going where he thinks it’s going—”and during that time, I’ve grown to have feelings for you.” She fidgets in her seat like some lovesick teenager. “I really like you and I was wondering if you would like to go out sometime,” she rushes, looking down then back up to Taehyung.

This is a first. In all his lives, no one has ever confessed their feelings towards him.

“Um.” He clears his throat. “I’m flattered, but there’s someone else I’ve been chasing my entire life.”

“Oh,” she mutters, looking dejected as she looks down. “She’s a lucky girl.”

Taehyung wants to laugh. If only she knew.

Another fifteen minutes go by and he grows tired of waiting for you. Grabbing his phone, Taehyung begins his search for you at the building you said you would be at. He searches high and low, but you’re not there.

Where the hell are you?

Thinking of all the places you can be, Taehyung begins his search all over campus. It takes him almost half an hour of searching when he finally finds you. His anger is on a whole new level when he reaches you.

Your back is to him, but he finds you sitting on a bench practically at the edge of campus. “Why didn’t you answer your phone? I’ve been looking for you for half an hour, Y/N,” Taehyung says, frustration clearly evident in his tone.

You jump from the sudden break in silence. You don’t turn around to look at him, so he goes to take a seat across from you, but when he sees you, his anger is gone and is replaced with concern and confusion. “Have you been crying?”

“No,” you lie.

“Y/N,” he begins, waiting for your gaze to meet his, “I’ve known you for our entire lives. I know when you’ve been crying. Did you get a bad grade on your assignment?” he asks, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.

“I’m surprised you found me,” you confess, trying to change the subject.

Taehyung isn’t having it. “I told you I’ll always find you. So you failed and that’s why you’re crying?”

You sniffle and scoff, “I wish that was it.”

Taehyung sighs in slight frustration. “Then what is it?” You’re silent for a while, avoiding his gaze. “Y/N,” he says more firmly. He’s not playing these games today.

You groan in your own frustration. “It’s this stupid guy,” you finally answer.

Taehyung wants to leave. Of course it is. Of course fate isn’t done playing with him.

“What? Did he reject you on Valentine’s Day? Should I go kick his ass?” Fuck fate. Fuck soulmates. Fuck all of this!

“If you can kick your own ass then go right ahead,” you reply in an aggrieved tone.

Taehyung is frozen, your words not registering in his head. “What?”

“Oh my God”—you jump to your feet in pure frustration—”it’s you! You’re the stupid guy!”

Taehyung rises to his feet as well. “Me? What’d I do?” What the hell are you talking about?

“I sometimes wonder how you can be so oblivious, or maybe I’m not good at showing how I feel.” You run a hand through your hair, that familiar tint of blush growing on your face. “I’m in love with you, Tae—hell, I think I’ve been in love with you since we were kids. But then I saw Stasia with you, and I heard her asking you out and-and I just couldn’t stand by and watch another person try and win you over when I’ve been standing beside you for years!”

It’s like everything fell of deaf ears after he heard the word “love”. You’re in love with him. You love him. Is this a joke? It can’t be right? Because after what felt like hundreds of lives—life after life of just chasing you, has he finally caught up with you? Is this it?

“—I mean she’s beautiful and funny and talented. I would go out with her, too, if i were you. Anyone would be lucky—”

In a few quick strides, Taehyung is in front of you, his hands cupping your cheeks and bringing your face up to look at him. There’s a look of shock on your face, but he can’t hold back any longer. He brings his lips to yours, and after a few seconds, you kiss him back.

Taehyung had always wondered if soulmates are real. He always wondered if kissing your soulmate would bind two people together. He always thought it was a tale, but as he kisses you, he feels like the clock within him finally begins to tick. Like his life is finally beginning. His life with you is beginning. No more being reborn. No more chasing.

He finally caught up to you.

Tears stream down Taehyung's face as you break the kiss. "What's wrong?" you ask with worry in your tone.

Taehyung shakes his head, opening his eyes to meet yours. "I've waited so long for you."

You give him a small smile, wiping away the tears. "I'm sorry it took me so long." He shakes his head again and kisses you. It doesn't matter how long he'd have to wait.

If it's you, he'll wait a lifetime.

Always Find You

More Posts from Clouditae