Elder Scrolls Madlibs

Elder Scrolls madlibs

Or more like Elder scrolls autocomplete/ auto-correct / mad libs.

Here is my first one:

THE OBLIVION CRISIS, behind the scenes

Lucien Lachance don’t mind that we offer free delivery to your door and Vicente Valtieri did a quick overview of the vampires of our lives.

Martin Septim went from being s little too small to a high risk business strategy. Uriel sent the wrong thing to the blades master and now Jauffre is not available for immediate delivery. Baurus and the others think that the company has taken a fantastic job and that everything is going great.

Meanwhile, in Oblivion, Mehrunes Dagon can’t find his laptop and Sheo is about to change the world of Harry Potter and the E bay. Haskill thinks that it would be better to just let Jyggalag, the driver, make a real problem.

Mankar Camoran and his merry band of cultist kraken cauliflowers sing the ancient woodland songs to appease the gross jesters of Nocturnal because she got mad after they kept stressing her favorite clients. I mean dogs.

Also, Mannimarco, the king of Wuv has come back to Cyrodiil and is in the mood for some fun with his pals, the judges of Tamriel’s got talent. But Arch-operator Traven of the Arcane Brewery wants to ruin his face and won’t let him do it. So, instead, he is stuck with a couple of cool looking retards and is trying to get some high.

M’aiq does not want to know how things will work out. He and the Nerevarine go for a drink in Todd Howard’s garage. There they meet Gabe Newell and gossip about Sload mash.

And that is how COC!Sheo got the most amazing idea to create the minions.

Notes:

I am surprised that it connected Vicente with the word vampires.

Also, according to Cyrodiilians of E3 433, the Nerevarine is on an expedition to Akavir. Either the Nerevarine was lying or Todd Howard’s garage is (in) Akavir and Gabe Newell is in Akavir.

Or Todd Howard has kidnapped Gabe Newell and now a doppelganger is posing as him. Or the Nerevarine and M’aiq are Gods that mastered Chim or whatever and they can get out of the godhead or the screen to chill irl.

In that case, M’aiq in our world, outside the godhead, has a human form. Who do you think he is? Please suggest only mortal people, not any religious figures from non-media related religions.

Or are Todd Howard and Gabe Newell friends? Like Zeus and Odin?  Idk. I googled it. I don’t think so...

So... I guess the highest mountain in Akavir (Todd Howard’s Garage?), please suggest name, is like the Olympus where all the gaming and in-game gods hang out? M’aiq does not want to know how things will work out. He and the Nerevarine go for a drink in Todd Howard’s garage. There they meet Gabe Newell and gossip about Sload mash.

And that is how COC!Sheo got the most amazing idea to create the minions.

Notes:

I am surprised that it connected Vicente with the word vampires.

Also, according to Cyrodiilians of E3 433, the Nerevarine is on an expedition to Akavir. Either the Nerevarine was lying or Todd Howard’s garage is (in) Akavir and Gabe Newell is in Akavir.

Or Todd Howard has kidnapped Gabe Newell and now a doppelganger is posing as him. Or the Nerevarine and M’aiq are Gods that mastered Chim or whatever and they can get out of the godhead or the screen to chill irl.

In that case, M’aiq in our world, outside the godhead, has a human form. Who do you think he is? Please suggest only mortal people, not any religious figures from non-media related religions.

Or are Todd Howard and Gabe Newell friends? Like Zeus and Odin?  Idk. I googled it. I don’t think so...

So... I guess the highest mountain in Akavir (Todd Howard’s Garage?), please suggest name, is like the Olympus where all the gaming and in-game gods hang out?

How I kinda see the meeting between the ldb (Lord/Lady Decibel?) and Miraak (Mimi) went down.

Pretty much what I get from a combination of fanfics and the original voice lines.

I know, my audio editing skill are kinda bad but I hope you get it.

Like Ganon from Zelda? He also gets trapped in a book, I think?

Lady Decibel ‘cause loud. That was my nickname at uni

Daedra Translate: Molag Bal

Google-translated Molag Bal. Like Malacath, there is too much modern AU of military and Christian-based cults in here.

Molag Bal: Google Translate

 Molaga Bal - Servant of the leader of domination and spiritual relations, it begs the question that he can catch the spirits of their domination.

Prince Moragbar The ruled and spiritually enslaved prince tried to tie his soul to his land [ Molag ]

 Molaga Bala - the leader of the slave country and tried to convey its spirit.

 Molga Baal - The prince is the Holy Spirit, who is trying to bring contentment and spirit to the kingdom.

 Mareg Bell - The Prime Minister is trying to stay on the moon

Mareg Bell-The incumbent Prime Minister trying to sit down on the moon.

Mulleg Bell - the Prime Minister, as a slave, tries to earn a living in the field.

 Mulleg Bell - Prince of the government as a slave, and tries to take lives in the field.

Prince Moragbar was once known as Mulleg Bell, a slave that was used on the fields. After leading a slave rebellion, he brought contentment to his kingdom and is venerated as the Holy Spirit. He is currently trying to conquer the moon but is unable to stay there due to Gravity issues but does not want to leave.

Daedric Dragonborn Fetish

The five pieces of evidence for the Oblivion Fad of ‘Dragonborn fetish’ are as follows

Piece of Evidence 1: Uriel VII was in oblivion for 10 years, I guess in Dagon’s realm.

Piece of Evidence 2: Sanguine and Martin

Piece of Evidence 3: If you have COC x Martin or COC!Sheo x Dragonborn with Martin as his bestie.

Piece of Evidence 4: Mr. Hentai Thingy with Miraak. Why else would he keep him for so many years? ;)

Piece of Evidence 5: Basically, almost all daedric princes want the ldb as their champion.

SCENE

In Judge Stendarr’s court room:

Judge!Sten : Mr. Daedra, you are being accused by Mr. Akatosh Aedra to having stalked, corrupted, harmed and even indirectly murdered his babies! What do you have to say for yourself?

Daedric princes minus Jyggy-poo but especially Sheo, Mora and Guiny:

What can we say, Dragonborns are HOT!

Akatosh*screaming hysterically, like Draco’s mom after she heard about the hippogriff incident*

Oh my Godhead! U hearin’ this? Punish them! Punish them! Punish them!

*Mara is at his side, with tissues and holding him back*

Judge!Sten: Mr. Daedra, how do you plead?

Daedra: Guilty, Guilty, 10^(Miraak’s age) Guilty! It’s all worth it and you can’t stop us!

Judge!Sten: You are all sentenced to a week of being lock and chained in a room at your Dad’s with Jyggalag babysitting you!

Cephalopoda traumatizing my favorite anti-heroes

Why?

After Miraak escapes with the last Dragonborn, I can see tentacles trying to pull Miraak back to apocrypha and Mimi screaming for the ldb to help.

Uncle Mory only has a taste for first dragonborns, apparently, and just doesn’t like the remake as much as the original? Even though it was partly his fault that the original was ruined?

So Miraak screams for the ldb to help but they’re just chill, like Smee and playfully slapping the tentacles away enough to keep him.

Like Captain hook and the Octopus from Peter Pan 2.

Slapstic ensures. By the end of it Miraak’s robes are ruined and he is pretty much in just his mask and his adorkable heart boxers. IF he even wears underwear. I don’t think people had underwear 4000+ years ago.

Google translated Daedric Princes Bios. Namira is a Blackface king that buys out her fans adoration with gadgets.

Namira: Google Translate

 Namira -  is the prince of "ancient darkness, and is revered as the patron saint of things."

Mira Prince of "Ancient Darkness," which is considered to hate everything [ Namira]

Namira - the boss of the old "darkness", the builder of everything that fans do.

Namira - a former "black" leader who did everything fans did.

Namira - the former "black" leader of all achievements.

Everyone thought that Teilhard was the "old black" king. [Namira]

Tiger - the prince of the "dark old", all things are considered protectors. [ Namira]

Daedra Translate

Namira "Mira", is the "old black" king of Teilhard who hates Everything. Once known as Tiger Prince of Ancient Darkness, this former "black" leader started new fads, listened to her fans, built everything they wanted and was revered as the patron saint of "Things".